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“Remember she likes her fruit cut in stars because it reminds her of god papa Regulus” Pandora said teasingly.
“Got it.”
“Oh, if you aren’t a bit stern she will never go to bed-”
“Pandora!” Regulus cut her off, “It will be okay, me and Barty will take good care of her now go have fun with James and Lily”
Pandora's shoulder shagged, smiling sheepishly. “Sorry, I picked you both as her godfathers for a reason and I know you will take good care of her.”
“We will,” Barty said, looking down at Luna who was currently playing with his chains.
“You will.”
Regulus rolled his eyes and grabbed them by the hips, turning them around and pushing them out of their door “Leave you menace.”
“Buuuut Reg,” they whined playfully, putting their body weight on him.
Barty looked down at Luna, who was now looking at the interaction curiously. “Maybe your mama is the one in need of babysitting.”
“Ma!” Luna repeated, clapping her hands.
Barty grinned. Then looked at Regulus, who finally managed to send Pandora on their way, turning around and looking at them as he leaned on the door.
“So.”
“So?”
“Do you have any idea how to take care of a four year old?” Regulus asked, tilting his head sideways.
Luna glanced at Regulus and mimicked his movement.
Barty blinked. “I was hoping you did.”
“Oh my god we suck. Luna! Want star-shaped fruits?”
“Papa Weg, yummy fruit,” Luna replied, squealing and bouncing on Barty's arms.
Barty snorted. “Papa Weg, give princess Luna her star-shaped fruit.”
“Shut up.”
“Your godfather is such a cranky man Lulu,” Barty said, walking towards the kitchen behind Regulus who was already cutting a few apples with the star shaped mold that Pandora left them.
“Down!” Luna wiggled in Barty’s arm, looking at him with her big blue eyes.
Barty glanced at Regulus. “Is it a good idea to put her down?”
“Yes, unless you want her to start crying”
“Right… I don’t want that, okay princess.” Barty softly said, putting her down on the floor as she immediately started to run around.
“I-..”
Barty blinked. “Where the..”
“Go find her?!?”
“Right, yes, I'll go find her,” Barty nodded, running around the apartment.
Regulus shocked his head, and proceeded to cut all the fruits into a bowl and turned around right as a giggling Luna came back to the kitchen and grasped Regulus leg and looked at Barty with a mischievous grin.
“To low papa arty,” Luna giggled.
“Damn papa arty, why are you so slow?” Regulus asked teasingly.
Barty put his hands on his knees, breathing heavily, throwing him a playful glare. “She could basically be in the track team, what is Pandora feeding her?”
“Food? I don’t know what parents feed their children,” Regulus said, glancing down at Luna with a soft smile. “Fruit?”
“Fruit please!”
Regulus chuckled, reaching down and picking her up and putting her on his waist and nodding towards the bowl. “Can you grab that Love?” he said, walking over to the couch and sitting down with Luna on his leg.
“Fruit and some water for the princess, and a kiss for my peasant.” Barty grinned, sitting down next to them and giving Regulus temple a kiss.
–
After an hour of feeding Luna her fruit and watching Toy Story, Regulus knew that it was too good to be true for a toddler to be entertained just by that. It was like once that hour hit, Luna was injected with a sudden surge of energy.
“Play!” Luna demanded, climbing off Regulus' lap and jumping around in a circle.
Barty and Regulus blinked. Regulus glanced over at Barty, “I thought if you feed them and make them watch TV they fall asleep after.”
“She’s not a baby Reg, she’s a toddler and they get bored easily”
“Fuck.”
Luna stopped jumping and looked at them both, her eyes quickly filling up with tears.
Regulus' eyes widened and kneeled in front of her. “No, no, don’t cry mi niña. What do you wanna play?”
Luna glanced at Regulus and considered for a moment, blinking and a small tear running down her cheek. “Princess and tea party!”
“Princess and tea party!” Barty clapped, glancing at Regulus.
Regulus lip twitched. “Yes, I’ll make us the tea and see if your mama has some cookies.”
“No! You princess and you princess” Luna stomp her foot, pointing at Regulus and Barty.
“I-..”
“Right. We are all going to be princesses”
Luna squealed, grabbing Regulus hand and pulling him towards Pandora room. “Dress up!”
Regulus opened and closed his mouth, shaking his head with a chuckle. “Okay, and am I going to have a pretty tiara?”
“Yes,” Luna said very seriously, as if this was a very important question.
“Good, Barty?” Regulus called out.
“What?”
“Come here, love. We have to be pretty princesses for our queen” Regulus snorted.
Barty walked into the room, “What?”
“We can’t have a tea party without wearing a gown,” Regulus replied, with a small smirk.
“Right..”
“And a tiara, that Luna will give us. Right princess?”
“Yes!”
Barty nodded, corner of his lip twitching. “Of course, what dress should I wear for my queen?”
Luna looked at them with a surprised expression, looked at the big closet and pointed for Regulus to open the door for her, and walked closer and pursed her lips - thinking very hard and pointed. “This one.”
“Beautiful.” Barty said, grabbing the green dress and glanced at Regulus and whispered. “Is Pandora gonna have our head?”
Regulus shrugged. “Maybe, what about me?”
“That one!” Luna pointed.
Barty burst out laughing. Regulus' eyes twitched, reaching in and grabbing the pink dress and looking at with a hint of distaste but smiling for Luna. “Ah, sooo pretty..”
“Pretty! Pretty!” Luna chanted, twirling around. “Me!”
“Yes you are so so pretty, now let's put on a pretty dress for you.” Barty said, after squeezing into the green dress and leaving it unzip. He glanced over at Regulus who was currently glaring at the offensive object.
Regulus watched as Luna and Barty walked out and let out a sigh, and reluctantly put the dress on. He didn’t mind wearing a dress, and he didn’t hate the color pink - It was just, the dress was a flamingo pink and it reminded him of glitter vomit. He zipped it up and looked down at him, grabbing the sides and curtsying. “I’m a pretty princess”
“What the fuck?”
Regulus jumped, and glanced at a matching dress Luna and Barty who was trying to hold in his laugh.
“Shut up.”
“No, please you are such a pretty princess isn’t he Lulu?”
“Pretty princess!”
Regulus stared at them, rolling his eyes, and then snorting. “Thank you princessa,” walking out to the kitchen and preparing some snacks and walking back to the living room where Barty and Luna were currently sitting and making paper tiaras.
“Oh wow, are those for us?”
“Yes, Papa Arty is cutting them for us.” Luna replied, concentrating on decorating them.
“Such a beautiful job” Regulus replied, putting the stuff on the coffee table and sitting down criss crossing.
Barty looked very concentrated as he cut the shape of a tiara. “This is nerve wracking, I don’t wanna fuck up”
“Fuck up” Luna repeated in agreement.
Regulus and Barty both froze, and glanced over at Luna who was still very concentrated in her decoration. Regulus slowly looked away and glanced at Barty who was looking at the paper as if his life depended on. “Barty..”
“Sorry, I'm busy cutting tiaras.”
Regulus pinched the bridge of his nose, glancing at Luna. “Love, we do not say that word.”
“Fuck?”
Barty bit the inside of his cheek to keep himself from laughing.
“Yes, we don’t say that. It’s a bad word, and uh icky word” Regulus attempted.
“Icky?”
“Mhm, princesses don’t say that icky word and you are a princess right?”
Luna nodded rapidly. “Yeth!”
“Tiara is-..” Barty choked out, still attempting to not laugh. “Uh, it’s ready.”
Regulus glanced over at Barty unamused, “Thank you dirty mouth.”
“I love you.”
“Mhm, I love you too, dirty mouth.”
Barty smirked a bit, about to say something dirty when he felt a tug to his shirt. “Erm, yes princess?”
“Tiara papa Arty,”
Barty smiled softly, and grabbed the ready tiara and put it over his head, feeling the glitter fall a bit. “How do I look?”
“The man of my dreams”
“Pretty! Sparkly!”
Regulus put the finished tiara on his own head, feeling the glitter fall on his cheek and helped Luna put hers on. “Beautiful.”
Luna smiled toothy. “Thank you papa rew.”
–
It only took Regulus and Barty two hours of playing princess tea party with Luna and a dance party with under the sea blasting in a loop for thirty minutes, and jumping around and twirling her to finally tired her out since it was near her bed time already and the back and forth joking argument on who was going to change her diaper since neither had done that task before; Barty lost of course, and a battle with Luna who refused to sleep in her room and demanded to sleep in the couch where they would be. She was sleeping soundly in between them still in her princess aurora dress and they were also still in the dress, because any time they were about to remove it. Luna almost cried.
“This is a win, I would say so myself.” Barty whispered, playing with the hairs on the nape of Regulus' neck.
Regulus rested her head on Barty’s shoulder, making sure to not disrupt Luna who was draped over them both. “Mhm, I think we did a good job for our first time.”
“We did,” Barty smiled, glancing down at Luna and tucking the blanket more.
Regulus yawned sleepily, feeling his eyes slowly closed. “We should volunteer to take care of Luna and Harry next.”
“Ah, you’re talking sleeping nonsense..” Barty replied, shaking his head. “That’s Remus and Sirius' godfather duty responsibility.”
“Ur’ right..” Regulus slowly drifted away.
Barty turned his head and kissed his temple and leaned down kissing Luna forehead. “I’m always right.” he replied, closing his eyes and soon falling asleep exhausted.
–
“I had so much fun, yeah, I love you both and yeah they are probably busy, if they have sex in my house while my child is here I will kick them.” Pandora said on the phone, walking into their apartment and expecting for Regulus and Barty to be getting it on but immediately surprised with the sight in front of them. “I’ll call you back Lils,”
Pandora softly closed the door, and walked over to the couch and took a picture at the three of them. They smiled to themselves, and shook their heads and glanced at the three of them with dresses on and the glittery tiaras on Barty and Regulus head, Pandora kneeled down and kissed Luna head softly. “Only you would get these two to dress up, what a wonder I made.” Pandora whispered.
