Chapter Text
The sound of the instruments that echoed in his ears was slowly fading as the audience started to clap. Jaehyun smiled and started clapping too, eyes shining in satisfaction after seeing that performance which the songs he was already very familiar with. The young man with the long black hair tied in a ponytail on top of the stage was bowing and thanking the crowd for being so heated in welcoming him and his band into the club. Jaehyun felt his heart beat faster as the man looked back at the audience as if looking for someone until his eyes landed on him. He then put his hand over his mouth and blew a kiss to Jaehyun causing him to blush automatically. Yuta was like that, he always liked to show who he was with, it was like he needed to show Jaehyun to others and say that he was his, and the other clearly liked that.
Seeing Yuta on stage was one of the things that made Jaehyun fall in love with him, the way he is gracious and gives his all to give the best show he can, even with his limited repertoire of self-composed songs. Jaehyun firmly believed that his talent was unrivaled and that major labels were losing a star. His bandmates were also talented, but Yuta was always the image and soul of that group of friends.
Jaehyun waved at him but he had already turned around and his band was pulling out their instruments. It was the band's last stop on their small, but successful, state-wide tour, in all its stops the audience was entertained and praised them for the show. The long haired man kept a wide smile on his face whenever he finished each of those stops and even though Jaehyun couldn't be present at every show, he knew that it was a great experience for the other. He was always texting and texting thrilled at how well the public had received them. And that's what he deserved, there was no one who believed more that Yuta was made for the stage than Jaehyun.
When the band had withdrawn, he was quick to go after them. Doyoung protested but followed him, he knew very well that when it came to Yuta, there’s nothing he could say to stop his friend from seeing him. When he saw the singer, he and his band mates were talking to a well-dressed man. It seemed important so they waited for the man to leave to reach them at the exit of the club.
“You were great."
Jaehyun said as he jumped on his boyfriend’s back. Yuta looked at him with a fond smile on his face. He quickly turned around to put his hands around Jaehyun's waist and pressed their bodies together for a kiss.
“It's all because of you, Jae.”
"Because of me? I'm merely a 7th sense’s fan you know.”
Yuta laughed lightly.
“I'm really glad you came today, it means a lot to me.”
“You know I would never lie to you. I love to see you sing.” He pouted. “Do you trust me that little?”
“So dramatic.” Yuta stuck his tongue out at him. “I love you, babe.”
"I love you too." He smiled brightly. "Who was that guy talking to you? I didn't want to interrupt."
"Oh, Jae you won't believe-"
“Hey lovebirds!” Junmyeon called out to them as he helped the other band members load the instruments into the van. “It's time to go. My uncle will kill me if this van is not in the garage by three in the morning.”
"Okay, okay. Come, I'll tell you on the way."
"Let's go." He smiled and gave another kiss to Yuta who intertwined their fingers together and guided him to the van. "Doyoung are you coming?"
Jaehyun looked at his friend who was behind him, he had his brows furrowed as if he was analyzing whether or not it was safe to climb into the vehicle.
"Is this safe?"
"Only one way to find out. Bun Bun." Johnny, the guitarist, muttered in his ear making him jump slightly in fright.
"Don't call me that. We're not intimate, hunf."
"If you say so." Johnny shrugged as he climbed into the van.
"Come on, Doie. Are you sure you want to stay?" Jaehyun held out his hand to his friend who stared at him before taking a deep breath.
"Huh, okay." He said holding the other's hand and climbing behind him.
"Please, let's stop somewhere to eat or order something. My stomach is begging for a cheeseburger or a pizza." Yuta said as he closed the back doors of the van and sat next to Jaehyun.
"Do we have time, Junmyeon?" Johnny asked the drummer while cleaning his own guitar.
"Huh, what time is it again?"
"It's almost one in the morning. Junmyeon." Ten, the bassist, who was sitting on the bench next to him said while rolling his eyes. "You were rushing us like crazy and you didn't even know what time it was?"
"Well, I was nervous! You guys know how things are."
Yuta laughed lightly.
"Junmyeon you’re always in such a hurry, breathe a little." He put his arm around Jaehyun's neck. "Are you hungry?"
"Not much, but… I think a pizza wouldn't be bad."
"A pizza then. You guys agree?"
"The princess has already chosen, of course it will be pizza." Ten turned to look at the four in the back of the van with the instruments and stuck his tongue out at Jaehyun who stuck it back at him. "Didn't expect to see you today, Jeong."
"I… huh…" He looked at Doyoung who rolled his eyes. "We did our thing. I didn't want to miss it.”
"What was the lie this time?" Johnny asked curiously.
"Theoretically, we're at an acquaintance's birthday party." Doyoung completed. "I just hope this van doesn't overturn"
Johnny laughed.
"You are so over the top sometimes."
The others just laughed. Sometimes it was funny to see Doyoung in that environment with him, they had known each other for as long as he could remember, they were always supporting each other despite their differences being noticeable. Jaehyun was seen as a free spirit, he was never afraid to get into the most diverse situations, while Doyoung was someone who always tried to keep his feet on the ground. He always kept everything under control and made sure they were safe, sometimes it even seemed that he was much older than Jaehyun because of that.
"And we're spending the night at this friend's house." Jaehyun said looking at Yuta who smirked.
"The whole night, huh?"
"Interested?"
"Gross, get a room." Ten rolled his eyes.
"Oh we will get one." Yuta said in a confident tone. "As soon as we arrive home."
“I see I won’t be able to sleep tonight.” Ten shrugged. “Hey Junmyeon, we could make out.”
“What? Ten you’re nice but-” The drummer blushed.
"Dumped." Johnny laughed as he seemed to adjust something on his own guitar.
"You're no fun."
"Huh, Hey, is there anywhere for me to sleep there?" Doyoung said in a suspicious tone. "Never been in your apartment before."
"Well, Ten sleeps on the couch which also turns into a bed and Johnny has his own room so…" Yuta replied, making Doyoung sigh at the realization.
"You will have to sleep with me. Bun Bun." Johnny said with a satisfied smile on his face. Doyoung widened his eyes then grimaced at Jaehyun who grimaced back.
"Huh, Okay then. Better than nothing I guess."
"Anyway… Guys, I can't believe it's over." Ten said with a smile on his face. "I mean, real tours must be a lot more tiring since they involve trips to even other countries and ours was limited to clubs with a very small capacity but…"
"It was amazing wasn't it?" Yuta smiled and stroked Jaehyun's brown hair. The other band members just nodded.
"You guys were really great." Doyoung said and that clearly got Johnny's attention.
"Did you like what you heard?" He asked, making sounds with his fingers running over the guitar strings. “I thought rock wasn't your thing.”
"Don't tease me, big guy."
Johnny just laughed. It's always like this when they met, Johnny and Doyoung were always bickering.
"Hey Junmyeon." Yuta called for the drummer. "Where's the card?"
"Right! Where's it…" Junmyeon felt in his pockets without losing focus on the road ahead of him until he found a small card. "Here! Something really great happened after we finished the show, you two won’t believe it.”
"What is that?" Jaehyun asked curiously.
"This man came from nowhere and started to talk about how he had seen a few of our shows before and said something like 'if you want the real deal, give me a call.' and gave us this card, he didn't seem like he was a liar or anything." Junmyeon continued, the words coming out of his mouth clearly showing his excitement. "He really seemed serious about that."
"I really hope It’s not a joke or something like that…” Ten said almost like a mutter.
"It's not! Guys, I’m sure It’s not!" It was possible to see Yuta's eyes shine. “I think this is real. This could change everything. It could be our chance to have a real manager and-"
Jaehyun hugged his boyfriend tightly. Happiness coursing through his entire body.
"That's amazing, babe!" He then turned to look at the others. "I told you that you guys would get noticed with this tour."
"This really looks legit." Doyoung was staring at the card intently. "You guys should call as soon as possible."
"I knew I shouldn't have doubted our biggest fan's prediction." Johnny chuckled lightly and raised his fist for Jaehyun to bump his.
"I still have no words…" Yuta took a deep breath. "But let's stay calm first, tomorrow when we are all well rested we can make the call."
"I won't be there, my old heart can't take it!"
"Junmyeon you're only twenty one years old, just because you're the oldest of us doesn't mean you're an old man!" Ten said, making the others laugh.
"You have a serious problem with thinking you're too old, Junmyeon." Johnny continued. "We're in this together, it's only fair that we're together for this, it's important."
"Exactly." Yuta said with a wide smile. "We've been together for how long? Three years just as a band? We're finally getting some real shit from our hard work, it's our big chance." He laced his fingers with Jaehyun's and pulled him down to place a kiss on his hand. "If you want to be together too, babe."
Jaehyun just shook his head.
"This is your moment, Yuta." He ran a hand through the other's black hair that was now loose and falling over his shoulders. "Besides, I have to go home with Doie early in the morning tomorrow, just in case."
Yuta pouted.
"Okay. But you're still spending the night with me, right?"
"I said I would. Silly." They kissed one more time and Johnny strained like he was going puke.
"You two can kiss too. I'm used to being the fifth wheel at this point." Ten pointed at Johnny and Doyoung with a sly smile. The two looked at each other and then looked away again. Jaehyun couldn't even imagine them kissing.
"Leave them alone, Ten." Yuta laughed. "They're still figuring out that they belong to each other."
"How long will it take for us to arrive?"
Doyoung asked after clearing his throat. He was clearly impatient. But luckily they were already in the suburban neighborhood where they lived. Halfway through they found an open pizza joint, Doyoung thought it was suspicious but as it was already very late at night there was no way they could be picky about where to buy and the band members were starving after the show.
The group settled in the living room as comfortable as possible to eat, although Junmyeon didn't stay for long, he just grabbed some slices of pizza and returned to the van to take it back to his uncle. He kept talking about how he was on the deadline that his uncle had rented the van and he didn't want to delay returning it to him otherwise he wouldn't be able to rent it again if the band needed it.
“Are you really going to call the number on that card tomorrow?” Junmyeon asked looking at Yuta who nodded as he swallowed a piece of pizza.
“We'll wait for you. We’re a team after all.”
The eldest smiled and said goodbye to the group. Jaehyun took a piece of pizza to eat, but quickly returned it to the box as the smell of the food made him feel a bit of nausea and suddenly got up from Yuta's lap making him look at him worriedly.
“You okay, Jae?”
“Uh-huh. I don't think I'm hungry, those muffins Doie bought before we got to the club might not have done me so well.”
"But they were great!" The brunette protested.
"Well, if the princess doesn't want it, there are those who want." Johnny said as he took the slice that Jaehyun didn't eat. Jaehyun just rolled his eyes, but as soon as the feeling of nausea passed he sat back down on his boyfriend's lap.
“How long did you guys stayed there waiting for us?”
“About an hour?” Jaehyun asked looking at Doyoung who nodded.
“Almost two, but it was kinda fun.”
"If you say so." Johnny said with a disdainful tone making the other just roll his eyes.
“Well, I think we’re done here.” Yuta patted Jaehyun on the thigh. “Wanna go to bed?”
He looked at him with those big round eyes. The singer seemed to be holding back the entire way and Jaehyun knew it, the way he looked and touched him was enough for him to know what his boyfriend wanted. After all, they barely saw each other this summer due to the tour. They just called and texted almost every night, but it wasn’t the same thing. Jaehyun also needed his touch.
“Okay.”
They said their goodbyes to the group and went to Yuta’s room. By the time the door closed behind him, Yuta didn't waste any time putting his hands on Jaehyun, if his boyfriend was touchy before, now he was famished. His mouth was leaving a wet path on his neck and his jaw while sucking on his skin. It was definitely going to leave a mark and it would be a bitch to cover up in the morning, but that was a problem for tomorrow's Jaehyun. Current Jaehyun was too busy wanting Yuta to take off whatever he was wearing.
“Someone is needy today.”
“Yes, Jae with so many good things happening at the same time, nothing better than being able to end my day with you. Missed you so much.” Yuta's hands went to Jaehyun's waist and then his ass. Jaehyun held on his shoulders and wrapped his legs around his boyfriend's waist and allowed himself to be taken to bed.
His back felt on the bed sheets and Yuta was quick to cage him with a smirk on his face. Jaehyun smiled at his boyfriend as he opened his legs to accommodate Yuta between them as he gave small trusts to get some friction with their still clothed cocks.
"Fuck, I've been wanting to do this since I got my hands on you after the show."
"You don’t say." Jaehyun smirked and they kissed again. His hands holding into the others neck pulling their bodies together.
Being in Yuta arms felt as amazing as ever, the way he managed to touch him and kiss him and fuck him always made Jaehyun felt like he was going to melt. His kisses on his neck started to go down until he wrapped his tongue around Jaehyun's nipple while his other hand teased the other bud. It was getting hotter and Yuta just pulled out Jaehyun's shirt and threw it somewhere, neither of them cared about where their clothes were anyway. They just wanted nothing between them.
“Turn around.”
He muttered in Jaehyun's ear and he was quick to do it. The long haired man just pulled Jaehyun’s pants with his boxers in one go before putting his hands on his asscheeks as the other remained there on all fours. He squeezed it strongly before pulling them apart to take a look at his hole. Jaehyun bit his lower lip already anticipating what was going to happen. Yuta pressed a kiss there and then It didn’t take long for him to be making a mess of Jaehyun as he eated him out making the most lewd sounds he could with his mouth. By the time his tongue entered his rim Jaehyun was already panting with his head on the pillows and his cock dripping precum on the sheets.
He saw Yuta smirking with the corner of his eyes and then the other just unfolded his belt and took off his ripped pants followed by his boxers. Luckily, Yuta had lube and condoms on his first drawer, he surely was prepared to have Jaehyun on his bed anytime since most of the times they fucked were there. They did have their adventures along the two years they've been together but that's another story.
“Y-you can put it in already .”
Jaehyun said with a groan as the first lubed finger went inside. He was impatient, after all. It was around a month since he felt his boyfriend dick inside him and he couldn’t wait anymore. The other just giggled.
“Who’s the needy one now?”
He asked as a second finger went inside and teased his prostate. Jaehyun hid his moans by putting his face completely on the pillow. Then the other stopped and turned him around. Eyes full of desire as he put on the condom and then lube on his dick. Jaehyun gasps as one of his legs were over the older man's shoulder and he feels the tip of Yuta’s cock tease over his hole before slowly pushing inside. When Yuta bottoms out, the first thing Jaehyun did was to put his hand on his mouth to try to make his moans not be that loud. He didn't want to put on a show for their friends but Yuta had other plans.
"No Jae, babe. I want to hear you." He muttered close to his ear as he was thrusting faster. Yuta grabbed Jaehyun’s wrist and pinned It above his head as he pulled back and looked down at him. "Let me hear you."
Jaehyun moaned as Yuta was rolling his hips trying to get even deeper. The other let the leg over his shoulder fall back and Jaehyun was quick to wrap both his legs around Yuta's hips as he pulled their bodies closer for another heated kiss.
"Fuck, you're so perfect Jae. I love you so much."
He was about to say something but a particular thrust made him choke out a moan and forget whatever he was going to say. He just allowed Yuta to do as he pleased as he was zeroing his prostate with his thrusts while chasing his release.
"So tight, so perfect." Yuta moaned and then his words became only Jaehyun's name as he released inside the condom but he didn’t stop thrusting into him. His other hand went to stroke Jaehyun's cock until he climaxed all over his belly between their bodies. Yuta them fell tired over him, his lips on his neck kissing and sucking the pale skin there.
"You're amazing." He managed to say.
"I love you, Yu."
"I love you too, babe."
They stayed all dirty and sweaty for a while before Yuta pulled out and threw the condom away.
"We definitely need a bath... and clean sheets."
Yuta just giggled and kissed him.
"C'mon lets get into the shower and then we solve the sheets situation to cuddle?"
"Please."
The next morning Jaehyun woke up a little dizzy and with the smell of eggs churning in his stomach. He looked to the side and Yuta was still sleeping with his naked back exposed. He looked for his cell phone to find out what time it was and he was ten minutes away from the alarm he had set. He sat on the edge of the bed for a few minutes waiting for that recurrent morning sickness to pass before getting up.
He took a quick bath and changed into his clothes from the day before and left the room only to find Johnny and Doyoung having a silent conversation in the kitchen. He tried to listen but they were practically humming until they stopped to look at Jaehyun as the bedroom door closed behind him.
"Oh, hey." Johnny waved at him.
"Hey, Jae. I thought you were going to take longer to wake up." Doyoung said as he turned off the stove. "Didn't mean to wake you or Yuta-"
"He was afraid of what he would find if he entered the room." Johnny said, interrupting Doyoung and then falling silent as he took a sip of the coffee he was holding. The other just rolled his eyes.
"Actually. The smell of the eggs that woke me up."
"Is everything okay, Jae?" His friend's hand went straight to his forehead to check his temperature. "You are paler than usual."
"I think those muffins really didn’t do me well, Doie. Hugh."
"You were always weak to sweets."
Johnny fetched a chair for him to sit on. Jaehyun blinked twice when he realized that the guitarist was only wearing pants and his chest was bare. He looked at Doyoung with a curious look.
"Did you guys sleep together?"
"What?" The other looked at him with wide eyes for a brief moment before clearing his throat to speak. "Ah… yeah? Ten sleeps on the couch, what could I do?"
Johnny laughed.
"Are you afraid I'm going to seduce your dear friend?"
"As if that were possible."
"Indeed." Doyoung nodded.
"Ouch." The guitarist said in a hurt tone.
"Anyway… I think I need some coffee to get my strength back."
"Ah, the best of the house here for you." Johnny said with a smile on his face as he placed a cup of coffee in front of him.
"Thanks."
"Good thing you're all dressed up…" He looked at his friend more carefully and grabbed his chin to turn his face away. "Jae… And what are we supposed to do with this?" He was clearly talking about Yuta's hickey marks on his neck. “You should have let him mark where no one could see it!”
"I'm sure he didn't have time to think about it." Ten said as he approached them. Jaehyun just lowered his head as he felt his ears burn. The blonde looked closely at the marks. “I have some makeup on me, we can hide it if you want.”
"Thanks. Please."
"Great, I'll ask for a cab to ride home. I also remember your parents are supposed to come over for lunch, I hope you can hide it well and when we get there, we will just brush it up.” Doyoung just sighed. "I'm sure my mom and yours have a lot to say about our college options."
Jaehyun felt a chill run down his spine at those words.
"Huh, now I don't know if I want to leave. Our parents need to have more to do than plan every step of our lives." He said, rolling his eyes.
"You are lucky to have parents who care about your future though." Johnny said as he put on a shirt. "I mean, I know they can be a little stifling but between not having them around and having…"
Jaehyun just sighed. Maybe Johnny was right and he was just too hard on his parents. But still he didn't like how they wanted to force their plans on him.
"If you knew my parents, you might think differently." Jaehyun shrugged.
"We have different lives so we can't compare. This conversation is pointless." Ten said as he finished putting makeup on Jaehyun's neck.
"You're right." Johnny shrugged. "Is Yuta still sleeping?"
"Totally blacked out. But I'll wake him up before I leave."
"Okay."
-
Jaehyuns sickness didn't get any better in the upcoming days. His stomach was rejecting almost everything he tried to eat, and would wake him up at the crack of dawn like a fucking farm rooster to spill his guts out in the bathroom. The internet suggested it might be a virus or a symptom of stress and Jaehyun couldn't agree more on the latter. Living with his parents had suddenly become a big mine field game and it seemed that he was always on the lookout.
He sat on the edge of the bed as usual and stayed there for a few minutes until he felt that he could stand up and start his day. He certainly should see a doctor at this point, but he didn't want to cause unnecessary worry to others. Maybe he should just buy some seasickness medicine from a nearby pharmacy and hope for the best. He got up and went to the shower. On weekends it was common for him to go to Doyoung's house and spend the day there. His friend luckily lived in the same neighborhood as him but still not close enough for his parents to be checking all the time if he was there or not, so it was easy for him to go to his friend's house but hours later go to meet Yuta.
“Jaehyun, sweetie, did you look at the emails with options for college I sent you?” His mother entered the room after two light knocks on the door. Jaehyun put on his shirt pretending not to hear what she said hoping she wouldn't ask again but to no avail.
“Jaehyun?”
“Oh. No mom, I'll look at it later." He said without even turning to her as he started to put some clothes in his own backpack.
"Sweetie, it's important, you already graduated, now you need to think about the next step."
"I know." He turned to her, taking a deep breath. “I promise I'll look at every email you sent me, okay? I just need not to think about it right now. You haven't stopped talking about it since I graduated."
“Well, it’s two months since your graduation.” She said in a worried tone. “Your father and I worry about you and your future. Sweetie.”
“I know. I worry too.” He approached her and took her hand. Jaehyun had already thought of many ways to say that he would like to do arts & design, but he knew it wasn't what his parents would want. They would never value that career for him, he needs to do something they are proud of, that is good enough for them to brag about to the whole family. “But please, could you just not bring it up for like… a week? I really need to relax and think about this.”
She looked like she wanted to say something but stopped herself and then just nodded.
“Okay, a week.”
"Thanks."
“But you need to see the emails. We found perfect colleges that-”
For Christ 's sake.
"Mom!" He said in a gruff tone.
"Sorry." She pouted. “We are very excited about your options.”
Of course you are. You’re choosing for me.
Jaehyun just sighed.
“I think I'll sleep over at Doie's tonight.”
"Again?" She cleared her throat. "I mean, you spend more time with him than us, I'm starting to get jealous."
Jaehyun just laughed lightly.
"As if you don’t love him, Mom."
“Indeed, he is like the second child I never had.” She laughed. “Tell him I send my regards, okay? By the way, next time I want him to sleepover. It's been a while since we've gossiped about the dramas and…”
“I’ll tell him.” He interrupted her before he started talking about dramas he had never seen in his life. It was scary sometimes how much time she and Doyoung could spend talking about that subject. Jaehyun on the other hand never saw the fun in that.
As soon as he shouldered his backpack and headed downstairs to leave, his mother interrupted him once more.
“Sweetie, are you skipping breakfast?”
He bit his bottom lip before turning to her trying to think of an appropriate answer. He had no intention of telling her that he had been feeling queasy from the mere smell of food lately, not only to not worry her but also to avoid questioning.
"Oh, I'm not hungry, Mom."
“You'll be weak like that, especially since Doyoung's house isn't that close.” She said, rushing down the stairs after him. “Have at least one orange juice or a glass of milk if you don't want to eat anything. I don't want you passing out in the street, Sweetie. Cycling when you’re weak can be dangerous.”
Jaehyun looked at her thinking about it. An orange juice really didn't sound like a bad idea. Maybe it didn't make him nauseous like most of the meals he was having made him feel.
"Fine. I think a cup of juice is not a bad idea.”
She smiled.
“I'll get it for you.”
-
The gate to the Kim’s house slowly opened right after Jaehyun rang the doorbell. On the other side he could see his friend with his arms crossed and a small pout at him. Jaehyun was a little late at the time he said he would come. Blame it on his mother who tried to get him to eat something, which he did but right after he left the house he ended up throwing up the sandwich she had made him eat. But he knew the other would forgive him. Even more so after he staggered to get off the bike to enter the residence and almost fainted, if Doyoung hadn't held him things would have been much worse.
“Oh my god, are you okay?” Doyoung put his arm on his shoulder and helped him up.
“Hugh, I… yeah.”
"That's not a very convincing answer."
"I blame my mother, I said I didn't want to eat anything."
“As if going out without food is any better.” He rolled his eyes and then just helped his friend to sit on the porch. Doyoung rubbed his hand over his forehead as if checking his temperature. “Do you want to come in or are you still feeling weak?”
Jaehyun took a deep breath.
"I think we can go in, I'm feeling better."
Doyoung raised an eyebrow at the other. He certainly wasn't convinced, but he didn't question it. He briefly greeted Doyoung's parents as he passed through the living room before heading upstairs to the brunette's room. Jaehyun's first impulse was to throw his backpack on the floor and lie down on that soft bed while the other closed the door and turned to him with a suspicious look.
“Are you going to tell me what is really going on?”
“Huh, It’s nothing, Doie.”
"Jae."
"Okay." He sighed and sat down on the bed. “My parents can't stop pressuring me about college. Like, they're constantly on my back and it's making me a pile of nerves. That must be why I've been feeling this sick lately, they won't leave me alone and it's just attacking my anxiety."
Doyoung knew well what Jaehyun was going through even though he didn't experience the same. His friend's parents were much more relaxed and let him make his own decisions, something he would have liked to have.
“I thought you already talked to them about this. Didn't you already say you wanted to do art & design?” He sat on the bed next to Jaehyun.
“Yes, I want it, but they certainly won't allow it.” He laid his head in the other's lap. "I told you, they'll want to force their professions on me so they can say I followed their example and blah blah." He sighed and felt his eyes fill with tears. Perhaps he was being affected by this more than he realized he was. “I don't know what to do.”
Doyoung stroked his friend's brown hair. He didn't quite know how to advise him but there was only one solution for him and even then things might not work out as he imagines.
"There, there. Jae, I know it's hard but… You need to tell them.”
"It won't do any good." He sobbed lightly.
“You can't know if you don't try. I know they are very controlling, but you have to be strong and say what you want.” He made Jaehyun sit up and look into his eyes. “You're great and you're going to succeed at whatever you want to do, but that doesn't mean you should let them dictate your future.”
"I know. I'm so weak, Doie. I'm scared.”
“Mrs. Jeong loves you, I'm sure of that. I don't think she would turn her back on you just because you decided to pursue a career she didn't envision for you. We just turned eighteen Jae, we still have a lot ahead of us.”
Jaehyun wiped his teary eyes.
“You’re right. Doie.”
The latter smiled.
“Furthermore, this situation is taking a toll on your health, you need to solve this as soon as possible.” He held Jaehyun's hand. “If you need I can go with you to talk about it with them. I'm sure my charms would be enough for Miss Jeong to let you do whatever you want.”
Jaehyun just laughed.
“She wanted to talk to you about those dramas you both watch. She sends her regards too.”
“She always remembers me, doesn't she?”
“Sometimes I think she might replace me with you to be honest.”
Doyoung hugged his friend tightly. Jaehyun didn't expect that action from the other.
“I was a little worried when you almost fell. Are you really feeling better?"
He hugged him tightly too, a slight smile forming on his face. He was very lucky to have someone like Doyoung around, that much he was sure of. Best thing he ever did in his life was punch him in the nose in junior high.
“I already am. Thanks."
“If you want, we don't need to hang out with Jungwoo today.”
“Ah… huh… about that…”
He looked down and felt his cheeks burn. It took Doyoung only a few seconds to understand what that meant and he smiled in a frightening way.
"You already didn’t intend to do that, did you?"
Jaehyun nodded as he tried to avoid looking the other in the eyes.
“Y-yuta said he didn't have to work today so he texted me last night asking me to hang out with him and-”
“Of course he did.” He rolled his eyes. “I just hope he takes you to the hospital in case you pass out or feel sick again.” Jaehyun pouted. Yuta would definitely take him in a heartbeat. “But you need to promise me that you’re telling him if you’re feeling sick.”
“I will. Don’t worry. I truly think that I just need to relax a bit. Doie.” He took his friend's hand. “You know I love you, but hanging out with Jungwoo right now is the least thing I need.”
"Yeah, yeah I know. Yuta can coddle or cover you in kisses or—” He cleared his throat. “Anyway, I'll be back by nine. Are you still going to sleep here?”
"Yes. I am. Don't worry Doie, I'll be back by then too.”
"Okay then." He sighed in relief. “At least you guys use protection, right? There is no risk that what you are feeling is something… else, right?”
Jaehyun froze for a second. A wave of thoughts instantly came to his mind but he forced himself out of that trance before his uncertainty became too obvious.
“Yes, we always use it.” He cleared his throat. “Like I said, I just need to allow myself to relax a bit and not think about anything for the rest of the day. I'm sure I'll feel better.”
He bit his lip hoping his friend wouldn't notice his hesitation. Doyoung just looked relieved.
“Okay then, I’ll wait for you tonight.”
“We can watch a movie. What do you think?"
“Huh, I don't like slashers.”
Jaehyun rolled his eyes.
"You choose."
Doyoung smiled in satisfaction. He was definitely going to choose some sappy romance for them to watch, it was too obvious. Jaehyun allowed himself to laugh a little but something inside him was twisting trying to push away a thought that invaded his mind after his friend's question. He shook his head trying to push the thought away as his ears refused to hear what the other was saying from that point on.
-
“Do you know what I like most about you?”
Jaehyun felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up when he felt Yuta's breath on his stomach. He looked at the other who had a bright look in his eyes, waiting for the answer.
"Well, by my count there's a lot of- ah ."
He was interrupted by the kiss he placed near his navel after lifting his shirt.
“I like a lot of things indeed…” He kissed a little higher. “I like your belly.” Another Kiss. “Your legs.” Another. “Your soft hair.” He continued kissing and lifting his shirt, the shorts Jaehyun was wearing were already getting tight. “Your beautiful plump lips.” And then his tongue wrapped around his nipple making Jaehyun hold back a moan. His hands went straight to cup his boyfriend's long hair and the other to his own mouth. He shouldn't allow himself to make a sound like that with the possibility of Yuta's roommates arriving at any moment. He felt the other suck on his nipple for a while until he let out a light chuckle and looked at how Jaehyun was panting from just that stimulation. “But what I like the most are your dimples.” He was hit by a slap on the shoulder. “Ouch.”
“You will pay for teasing me like this.”
Yuta just laughed and lay down next to him on the bed and poked his cheek with his index finger.
"Show me."
Jaehyun rolled his eyes but smiled anyway.
"Happy now?"
"A hundred per cent." Fingers with black-painted nails caressed his cheek. "I'll write you a song and call it 'Dimples'."
"Another song?"
Yuta opened his mouth in disbelief.
"You don't want? Okay."
"As if you weren't going to write it anyway. Yu." He stuck his tongue out at his boyfriend. "Your bandmates must be tired of having to play songs about me by now."
"What can I do if you're my main source of inspiration? Besides, I didn't write that many songs."
Jaehyun thought of the songs Yuta had already dedicated to him and started counting on his fingers.
"Let me see… There's 'In Your Eyes', 'Lovesong', 'My Heart' and I'm sure 'First Sight' is for me too."
Yuta blushed.
"You really remember them all."
Jaehyun turned to look him in the eyes and caressed his boyfriend’s bare chest.
"Of course I would remember. Didn't I say I am the biggest fan?"
The other giggled and gave him a light kiss on the lips.
"Yeah. You sure are." He smiled slightly. Despite that, his gaze looked hesitant. "I'm a little anxious."
He already knew why the other was like that. The band members were all anxious and he didn't need to talk to all of them to know, the meeting with the man who had given the card to them was scheduled for that week. If that wasn't a lie, as it happened before, maybe that was their big chance to have a real career.
“The meeting, right?”
Yuta nodded with a sigh.
"I know we can't take this for granted and that it's just an opportunity that came out of nowhere, but… I just want it to work and I truly hope this is real, you know?"
Jaehyun intertwined their fingers.
"I know. It will be."
More than anyone else, Jaehyun knew the difficulties the singer was going through with his bandmates. He wanted to be able to help but there wasn't much he could do other than be like an emotional support for the other. He wanted more than anyone else for Yuta to succeed with the band. Not only because of him, but the other band members too. They deserve to be recognized.
"I hope so." He muttered looking away. “If this time it doesn’t work…”
Jaehyun squeezed his hand.
“No negativity! You will be successful and famous. Though maybe I'll be left behind since you guys will have a lot of loyal fans and meet other famous people, probably, and-"
Yuta interrupted him with a kiss.
“You're still going to be the biggest fan…” He buried his face in his neck. “And you're the only one I want. Jae."
“Let's see if you still think like that after you become famous.” He chuckled, Yuta looked at him in disbelief.
“Do you trust me that little?”
"It's not that. But I should become so uninteresting in your eyes, you'll probably meet other people much more interesting than me and-"
“You are soooo dramatic.” Yuta sat down on the bed and pinched the other's cheeks from both sides. “Like that would ever happen.” He then smiled and got up from the bed. "That reminds me, I have something for you."
"What?" Jaehyun watched him with curious eyes as the latter opened his own wardrobe and searched for something inside.
“Do you remember that drawing I did that was supposed to be on one of the tshirts for the tour?”
Jaehyun thought for a moment. He had seen many of Yuta's drawings before, he always thought he was very talented at it. He and Ten were responsible for the artwork for the covers of their singles and the artwork for the shirts they made from time to time. He searched his own memory for the image of that specific drawing.
"The one that's a mouth with a cherry?"
"Yes! That one!" He pointed at Jaehyun and then threw a black shirt at him. "I was supposed to use it, but... you know, I kind of remembered that I didn't get you anything for your birthday but half a slice of cake and I remembered that you really liked that drawing and..." He blushed. "I asked for only one shirt with that design but I forgot to give it to you last week when you slept over but..."
Jaehyun sat on the bed and looked at the shirt. The design was on the left side. It was small and simple on the front, but it had a bigger one on the back center with the name '7th Sense' written just below. The shirt had turned out even better than he'd imagined it would. He ran his hand over the drawing in wonder.
“It’s… It's really beautiful. You didn't need to do this Yuta. I told you that you didn't have to give me anything. Besides, it's been months since my birthday."
Yuta smiled proudly and sat next to him on the bed.
"I know. But I wanted to. Jae, you're my boyfriend and I love you so much, I wish I could give you so much more than just a shirt." He kissed his cheek. "I want you to have It."
He was quick to take off the t-shirt he was wearing and put the shirt on and stood up to look in the mirror that was on the door of Yuta's wardrobe.
"It's perfect."
The older man got up and held him by the waist, pressing his chest to his back.
"Did you like it?" He asked, kissing the other's neck making a shiver go through his body.
"Yes. I loved it."
He smiled as he looked at himself in the mirror. Yuta’s hands were slowly going into his shorts, but he stopped him.
"I just showered. I'm not doing this again."
He turned to the latter who just laughed.
"You know I like to tease you."
"Yeah, I know."
"Well, since we can't… I'll go take a shower!"
"Am I supposed to say something?"
He stuck his tongue out at his boyfriend who just laughed.
"You're no fun."
He stuck his tongue back at him and went to the bathroom while Jaehyun stared at his own reflection in the mirror. He really liked that shirt. He turned around to see how it looked on his back then turned to see the front again. He noticed the hickeys on his neck again but just giggled. He was already used to that. He felt his own body with his hands but as he ran a hand over his belly, his slight smile faded as the thought of earlier returned to his mind.
"No."
He said to himself with a bite on his lip. And then he heard the sound of whistling coming from the front door of the small apartment. He shook his head to dispel the thought as he went to see who it was.
“Oh, princess. How are you?" Ten asked with a smile on his face as he walked in with two bags in hand. “Where is Yuta?
“Hi Ten. I’m fine. Yuta is taking a shower.” He pointed in the direction where the sound of the shower was coming from.
“Phew, I’m glad I made it after the act.” Jaehyun blushed and Ten just patted him on the shoulder after placing the bags on the table. "I’m kidding."
"Sorry."
“You take my joke too seriously sometimes. Relax, Jeong.” He shrugged as he unpacked the groceries. “And johnny?”
“I don't know, when I arrived only Yuta was here.”
"I think he's probably working. I remember him saying something about it." The blonde said thoughtfully. "Anyway, at least I did some shopping for this week so we won’t starve." He placed a small red box in front of Jaehyun and opened it for him. "I couldn't resist and bought one of these, feel free."
Jaehyun looked at the dessert in front of him and a sudden urge to vomit came. He put a hand over his mouth to try to contain anything that came from his stomach and turned his back so that the blonde wouldn't notice. He tried to contain that urge as long as he could.
"Thanks but I already ate." He shook his head. "Actually…" He walked towards the couch in the living room where he had dropped his bag when he arrived and slung it over his back. "I-I was on my way out."
"Oh. Did something happen?" Ten asked confused.
"No, it's just that I have to go. Doie needs me. Can you let Yuta know when he's done with his bath?"
"Of course. But are you sure you don't want to wait for Yuta to take you?"
"No. It is alright."
They said their goodbyes but Jaehyun couldn't say what exactly was his words as he was already closing the door behind him. As soon as he left the building he walked for a few a while until he threw up in a nearby street dumpster.
His heart was beating faster and he wished he could deny the possibility with all his might. That nausea was a reminder to him of what he had been trying to ignore since he talked to Doyoung earlier. Jaehyun leaned against the wall of a house and took a deep breath. He needed to calm down. There was once, only once, on a day that Yuta had come back from another city during the time they were on tour and Jaehyun had snuck out to see him. He was sure it had broke, but neither he nor Yuta noticed it when it happened. The only solid memory was of the wetness inside him the next day. He should know that it would come back to bite him in the ass.
"It can’t be."
He said to himself as he walked quickly through the streets. He was going back to Doyoung's house. But first, he needed to make a detour to the nearest pharmacy.
-
At that moment fear was the only feeling that enveloped his entire body as he sat on the toilet. He arrived at Doyoung's house early. Since he was considered almost family, it was common for him to come and go from the latter house. And it was stupid that he was there but his thoughts or choices about what to do weren't rational at this point. He needed to know what was happening to him and the only thing that everything pointed to was what the small object in his hands was there for.
It took a while for him to actually pee as the anxiety was burning through him. He was unconsciously doing everything he could to avoid knowing the truth. Jaehyun didn't really know how long he would have to wait, but he hoped it would be a long time. He didn't want to see the result. He was more scared than anything. With every second of waiting he felt like he was going to throw up. His stomach lurched as anxiety rose within him. This time he was sure it was anxiety and not the possible baby in his belly.
"Please, don't be that."
He said to himself with a sob. He wanted to just believe he was sick or just under so much pressure that his body was giving up, but something in his core knew it was more than that. It was just his wishful thinking that it would be one of those things. When he raised his trembling hand to see the result he wanted to be able to say he was wrong. But there was no way he could deny what the two bars on the test told him. He was with Yuta's baby growing inside him.