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"Tyrion, I'm sleeping in your place tonight!"
"Jaime, what is it this time?" He didn't even manage to say hello.
Tyrion can't help but massage his head. Jaime probably did something or worse.. being a man-child again.
"Brienne doesn't love me anymore! I need space!" Jaime on his dramatic era.
"I don't believe you Jaime! What happened really?"
"Is that Tyrion? C'mon Jaime! Stop bothering him and I didn't say that I don't love you anymore!" He heard Brienne on the other side.
"Please give Brienne the phone Jaime before I lose my shit on you!"
"Fine!" passing the phone to Brienne while pouting
"Sister of mine, why is Jaime acting like a teenager again?"
"ooh.. it's nothing really, sorry for wasting your time Tyrion. I can handle Jaime."
"I know you can but that son of bitch brother of mine, will pestering me until he get what he wants! So you must tell me."
"I can't Tyrion! It's embarrassing!"
"SHE DOESN'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH ME TYRION BECAUSE SHE HAVE HER PERIOD!" Jaime shouting on the line.
"FUCK YOU JAIME LANNISTER! THAT'S BETWEEN YOU AND ME! ALSO, I DIDN'T SAY THAT I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE!"
"SAME THING!!! WHAT'S THE USE OF THE SWORD WITHOUT A BLOOD?"
Tyrion wants to vanish... forever.
"Hello Tyrion? Are you still there?"
The line hang up.
