Chapter Text
House is caressing your leg with his palm, his other arm rests on his forehead. He has a smile on his lips and light sweat on the sides of his head. You look similar, rolling over to press kisses to his pectorals. It causes House to glance down at you.
“God, you’re pretty.” He murmurs. You chuckle, and his smile brightens.
House tugs on your elbow and you scoot further up until he can kiss you. Even though you just had sex, he kisses you hungrily, apparently unsatiable when it comes to having you close. You enjoy it thoroughly, resting your hand on the side of his face.
“You hungry?” He asks quietly.
“Very.”
“I don’t have food.”
You laugh out loud.
He leans aside to grab his phone from the nightstand. “Pizza?”
“Perfect.”
While he orders, you go to the bathroom to freshen up and put some comfortable clothes on.
As you exit the bathroom, you call: “Want a beer?”
House’ reply gets drowned out by you loudly cursing: “Holy shit, how did you get in here?!”
James Wilson is standing in the middle of the living room, staring at you wide-eyed.
“I-“ He blinks. “I have a spare key.”
“Right.” You look back at him, equally startled.
House enters, wearing a robe and a smug smile on his face.
“Hello there.” He nods as if this were totally normal.
“What- ehm,” Wilson keeps stumbling over his words, eyes darting over you. He clears his throat. You wink at him and saunter to the kitchen to get beer.
As soon as you’re out the room, he whisper-shouts at House: “Why didn’t you tell me you had a prostitute over?”
You freeze for a moment, waiting to open the fridge because you want to keep listening.
“Would you like a schedule for when I have sex?”
“No! Just…” Wilson sighs exasperatedly.
When you reenter the room, you see that his cheeks are flushed – whereas House looks awfully pleased with himself.
“There is a case.” Wilson finally says and hands the file to House. “I tried to reach you, but…” He clears his throat once more.
“I was busy.” House tells him and opens the file with one hand to quickly scan it. “Where are the lab reports?”
“Not in yet.”
“Then why did you even bother to come here?”
“Because I was worried!” He throws his hands up.
“About what? Me overdosing?”
You press your lips together, not sure if it’s appropriate to find this amusing, since Wilson appears honestly concerned.
“Well, yes!”
“How did you come to that conclusion?”
“It- you’ve been very cheery recently.”
“Sure, and the only explanation is that I’m having a little too much fun with my pills.”
Wilson rubs his face, and House looks at you with a smile on his lips.
“Let me assure you, it’s not the pills.” He pauses. “It’s sex, lots of it.”
“Oh my god.” Wilson cringes.
“We ordered pizza, you want to have some?”
“Fuck, no.” He replies and makes his way to the door.
“While you’re here, do you have some cash on you?”
“What?”
House nods towards you: “To pay her.”
“You can’t be serious.”
“Deadly.”
Now you cannot help but chuckle, but not for the reason Wilson thinks.
With a sigh, he gets his wallet out. “How much?”
You look at House. He raises his eyebrow.
“Three hundred.” You say.
“Three hundred!?”
“I’m very good.”
“And some for the pizza.” House adds.
Wilson takes all the cash he has out of his wallet and hands it to you.
Then he points at House and says: “You’re a terrible person.” He yanks the door open but pauses to tell you: “Nice to meet you.”
“Bye, Dr. Wilson.” You wave.
As soon as the door falls shut, you start laughing.
“He-“ You wheeze. “He believed that!?”
House walks towards you and presses a kiss to your lips: “I told you you’re pretty. Too pretty for me.”
You roll your eyes and brush his dick through his boxers with the back of your hand. “You’re big enough to make up for your terrible looks.”
House bites his bottom lip, appearing at least a little flustered.
“Yeah?” He murmurs, leaning in for another kiss.
You nod: “I told you while you were in me, I’ll gladly tell you when you’re not as well.”
Now his cheeks flush.
You stroke his cheekbone with your thumb and pull him in for a sweet kiss.
“I’m keeping the money, by the way.”
~
By chance, you find yourself in line in the cafeteria behind Wilson and House.
House gave you a grin, while Wilson hasn’t noticed you yet. Probably, because you look very different from last time, he saw you. In formal attire and all.
When it’s their turn to pay, you speak up: “It’s on me.”
Wilson flinches and turns to you, mouth agape.
“Very kind.” House says.
You get out some of your, well, Wilson’s, money, and hand it to the cashier.
As soon as the three of you are back in the lobby, everyone now with a coffee in hand, Wilson speaks up: “What on earth is she doing here?”
“I work here.”
“I gathered! House, I cannot believe you would- Cuddy!” He waves her over.
“Are you seriously going to snitch on me?” House asks.
“Damn right I am!”
“Bitch.”
“What’s going on?” Cuddy looks at the three of you.
“House-“
She interrupts to ask you: “What did he do now?”
“Wait, you know about this?” Wilson looks like he’s about to cry.
“About what?”
“That House,” He lowers his voice even more, “has a prostitute-“
“Wilson!” House gasps.
Cuddy stares at him, aghast: “You did not just call the new head of HR a prostitute.”
“What?!”
“I’m so sorry.” Cuddy apologizes to you.
“Don’t worry about it.” You smile.
Glaring at Wilson once more, she leaves.
“Dr. Wilson, Dr. House.” You nod at them, also about to leave.
“Wait, wait, wait. You cannot be serious…oh, god! That’s the reason you’ve been to HR so much in the past weeks. And, and that’s how you knew my name!” You can see how it clicks in his head.
“And you still took the money!”
“You called me a prostitute. Might as well pay me like one.”
“I cannot believe you make look like I’m the insane one here.”
“Would you like to talk to HR about it?”
He takes a deep breath and then says: “You know what, good for you, House. And thank you, ma’am. Your methods might be unethical, but who here cares about that anyway, however, they are effective. So thanks, I guess.”
“Effective?” House asks.
“Well, how many times were you forced to see HR, like actually see, because you did something outrages, like-“ He gestures around. “I don’t know, push a thermometer up a cop’s ass and then leave him in that examination room for hours.”
“You seriously did that?”
House shrugs his shoulders.
“What you are trying to say, is that because I’m bedding this exquisite man, who even takes time out his full schedule to protest ACAB, he became easier to deal with?”
Begrudgingly, Wilson agrees: “I guess so.”
You feel like House and you both made your point, so you glance at House who gives you the quiet go ahead.
“Dr. Wilson.” You offer him your hand, “I believe we never were properly introduced.” You state your name and add: “New head of HR. I started last month.”