homicide has never been groovier (jazz hands)

by dethtoons

Summary:

Jackalope gives the prisoners exclusive MILGRAM phones in order to create community bonding.

they ruin it obviously

takes place at the very beginning of MILGRAM even before Haruka's verdict

Chapter 1: 7:30 — new devices, strange place

 

Everyone is in the cafeteria. They're mostly quiet with a little buzz between the adults. Jackalope speaks on the intercom as Es enters through the door.

 

"Hello Prisoners! In order to encourage higher levels of bonding between you all, Es will be giving you certified MILGRAM phones! Have fun. And no, the only apps you can access are the camera and text apps hehehe—"

 

Es passes the phones around. Most of them are shocked to actually have phones in prison and others are just glad to have a sense of normalcy. Es doesn't bother speaking with any of them, their own phone will be blowing up in a matter of days anyway.

 

---

 

7:30AM

 

Kazui: Goodmorning everyone.

 

Shidou: Goodmorning Kazui. How are you?

 

Mahiru: Goodmorning! I hope you both slept well! <3

 

Kazui: Thank you. I slept well, Mahiru and feel great, Shidou. Getting these phones really does make things easier to communicate. Especially between the hours we aren't allowed out of our cells.

 

Fuuta: god ths is dry

 

Yuno: rightttttt???? im yawning js reading it <(=_=)>

 

Kazui: Goodmorning Yuno and Fuuta. You both seem lively.

 

Fuuta: ye and u seem dead 

Fuuta: u txt lik a 75yro man jfc

 

Yuno: ^^^^ (no offense kazui (^>^))

 

Kazui: None taken. I am an old man after all.

 

Kotoko: So this is the group chat that Jackalope was talking about

 

Kazui: Goodmorning Kotoko.

 

Kotoko: Goodmorning Kazui.

 

Mahiru: Goodmorning Kotoko! And to Yuno and Fuuta too! <3333

 

Kotoko: Morning.

 

Fuuta: ths is the dryest fucking chat 

Futta: yall r borin and massive L's

 

Kazui: That isn't the nicest thing to say Fuuta. Especially when you don't know any of us truly.

 

Fuuta: L + ratio + bozo

 

Yuno: lmao is that a twitter user i see lmaooooooooooo

 

Fuuta: kys ur probably a fucking murderer bith

 

Yuno: we're all murderers u dumbass. did u suddenly get amnesia dummy?

 

Fuuta: kys i mean with ur own hands idiot

 

Mahiru: This isn't very nice nor does it count as bonding :(

 

Shidou: Nor is it productive.

 

Kazui: Yikes.

 

Fuuta: imagine a grown man saying yikes roflllllllllll

 

Yuno: leave Mr. Kazui alone u incel 

 

Fuuta: who

 

Yuno: ??? wtf the dude who's user is literally Kazui

 

Fuuta: asked 

 

Notes:

Haruka and Amane don't know how to use phones at all. Amane knows enough to be able to read the messages but Haruka's phone is still turned off (despite his best efforts)

Mikoto is still sleeping lol

Es doesn't even want to pick up the phone

Muu is taking pics of herself