Chapter Text
If you're looking for Park Jimin, you need to go past the pack village's border, follow the curvy path through the murky land just beyond the last building, and then cross the meadow to reach his cottage on the edge of the forest.
Visiting might be a hassle to go that far to some, but if you ask Jimin, he’ll tell you his home is an herbalist’s dream come true. Although his living arrangements may not be exactly as he imagined as a pup, he cherishes the abundant sunlight shining upon his cottage, and his vibrant green garden that owes its lushness to the humid air of the forest right behind it.
He rarely has guests unless there are festivities approaching, even though his door is always open for anyone looking for herbs and herbal remedies. It’s only partly because the murky lands scare away half the population between twilight and dawn. Sometimes, Jimin suspects that people have forgotten about him after his parents passed away and he left the village to live on the outskirts and study herbalism from old herbalist Byugom-ssi—who has also passed away since.
Nevertheless, certain people come around weekly, and that's why there’s currently a nonsensical conversation unfolding in his kitchen.
“No, hyung, you did every step wrong,” Jimin says, his patience running thin while, at the same time, he’s trying really hard not to make his amusement obvious. Only Jung Hoseok is capable of making him feel at the opposite ends of the mood spectrum at once. “Sage is to cleanse your space inside the house. You burn it like incense. Basil is to protect your home from spirits who want to enter, so you hang it next to your door outside. It’s literally so easy to tell them apart, look, the sage is sun-dried and the basil is fresh. They also smell very differently.”
The things he’s doing for his best friend’s peace of mind... Jimin is no witch, but he’s willing to skirt the lines of witchcraft when his friend swears there’s a spirit haunting his and his mate’s home.
Also, it’s fun listening to the nonsense spilling from his mouth, because even if Jung Hoseok is convinced of the existence of spirits, Jimin, like every other wolf in the pack, has doubts about their realm.
“Are you sure?” Hoseok asks, not looking very convinced as he lifts a limp bunch of fresh basil from Jimin’s work desk.
“What do you mean, am I sure?” Jimin grumbles. “Who is the herbalist in this pack, me or you?”
“You, but the herbs were ineffective the last time, so allow me to feel doubtful.”
“Because you were burning the fresh basil and hanging the sage by the door. I know you did because Tae told me your house smelled like charred boar toes for five days after you set the basil on fire.”
“I didn’t know an herb that made food so tasty could smell so bad!” Hoseok exclaims.
Jimin purses his lips and bites his cheeks because he really doesn’t want to ruin the fun by laughing, but more than that, he does not want to look towards a certain spot in his kitchen, currently occupied by a brooding Jeon Jeongguk who looks anything but amused.
Jimin doesn’t look at him because he knows the alpha’s stone-cold face would successfully freeze the mirth in his heart. He gets to have so little fun nowadays that he doesn’t want to ruin it by giving in to his omega’s urge to ogle some cocky alpha's stupid face.
Jeon Jeongguk is silently observing the absurd banter unfolding in front of him with the patience of a true hunter. He does this all the time: he tags along with Hoseok whenever he visits Jimin, stands in the same spot in Jimin’s humble cottage, and observes Jimin with unreadable eyes. Jeongguk never seems to enjoy these visits, and he never has anything to add to the conversations either, so Jimin wonders why he bothers to waste his time like this.
Maybe he's displeased with Jimin's existence so much he needs that feeling validated on a weekly schedule.
It’s just so sad if you consider that once upon a time, Jimin and Jeongguk were a pair of inseparable pups. Sworn best friends, even though they were omega and alpha.
Many pups like them end up in courtship, and then they mate once they both come of age, but there are always the rare exceptions who go against all odds and grow apart.
Like Jimin and Jeongguk.
It may be an unfortunate twist of fate or the Moon Goddess’s cruel joke—either way, Jimin sometimes fears that the Moon Goddess hates him. First, he lost his parents to a wildfire right after his first heat. It was no one’s fault that the fire trapped them along with a dozen other unfortunate wolves, but understanding that did not elevate Jimin’s pain. He lost his home to the fire too, so he moved in with old herbalist Byugom as his apprentice, killing two birds with one stone since he'd been yearning to deepen his knowledge about useful plants and flowers. Jimin lost the track of time after that—and lost himself for a while, too. While he was too busy studying and licking his soul’s unhealable wounds, Jeongguk had his first rut. He took upon the role of a hunter shortly after, spending every day in the forest learning how to track prey and kill like a true predator. They just woke up one day and stopped being each other's priorities.
When on the rare occasions Jimin and Jeongguk crossed paths, the alpha looked the other way without uttering a word, as if even the sight of Jimin irritated him. Jimin isn’t proud of the person he was back then, bitter and sad and jealous of everyone whose life wildfire didn't ruin, and that, unfortunately, included the only people he had left: his group of friends.
But even without these aforementioned complications, a fallout in their group of seven was inevitable: they were an uneven number, three of them alphas and the other four omegas, so it was simple to figure that one omega would remain without a mate.
It just sucked to be the one nobody wanted.
Namjoon and Seokjin mated first. They orbited around each other the same way Jimin and Jeongguk used to. And then Hoseok and Taehyung followed them with quick success, their wolves claiming each other as soon as Taehyung presented. With only Jimin and Yoongi remaining, Jeongguk’s options narrowed down to two wolves, and with the cold shoulder he was giving Jimin, it wasn’t hard to guess who the youngest alpha chose.
Not Jimin.
In hindsight, maybe Jimin should have acted more like a human and less like a feral wolf in the beginning. Maybe then Jeongguk wouldn’t have stopped loving him.
The worst part is that Jimin can’t blame him; he wouldn’t have chosen himself either back then.
It’s okay. His secret crush harms no one (except maybe Jimin). It’s not like alphas and betas are lining up in front of his cottage with courting presents, and Jimin has a pair of very well-functioning eyes which just happen to be drawn to good-looking alphas. It’s a superficial weakness Jimin refuses to be ashamed of, especially since it’s nobody’s business if he happens to find his childhood best friend the most attractive wolf in the pack.
And he has Jwi, anyway. It’s not like he’s completely alone.
It’s fine. Jwi keeps him company, and even though a mouse can’t hold conversations, Jimin enjoys watching the little critter—labelled a pest by most of his friends—hunt for edible stuff in his kitchen. He—Jimin assumes it’s a he—has been around since spring, so Jimin supposes he plans to live the rest of his brief life in the comfort of the cottage. Lately, he’s started to get used to Jimin’s presence, and Jimin’s been able to hand-feed him with small snacks.
“I’ll take both, if that’s okay,” Hoseok says, startling Jimin out of his reminiscence.
“Sure, just don’t forget which is which.” Jimin manoeuvres a glass jar of special tea blend off the top shelf to measure some into a linen pouch. “Stop being careless if you want to keep Tae and your unborn pup safe.”
Hoseok gapes at him, and Jwi stops munching on whatever yummy thing he discovered behind Jimin’s heavy wooden cupboards.
Another thing Jimin won’t deny if accused of: he loves teasing Hoseok because he’s about the only wolf in the entire pack who believes in the existence of spirits. He also happens to be fatally scared of them, and thus he’s doing everything he can think of to protect his pregnant omega from them.
It’s a ridiculous thing to do, but on the lonelier evenings, when not even Jwi’s little whiskers poke out from under the cupboard, Jimin yearns for an alpha like Hoseok.
“Seriously, I can’t stand you, hyung. Just take both. The fresh bunch is the basil,” Jimin grunts grumpily. He ignores the pang of jealousy in his heart caused by his own silly thoughts and seals the pouch with the tea in it. “This is tea for morning sickness. Tae should feel better by the end of the week if he drinks this three times a day.”
“Will he like the taste?”
“I mixed rosehip in it, so it should be okay. He likes rosehip,” Jimin says.
“He’s very particular about the taste of everything these days... He says he can only stomach salmon, so I hope you’re right about the rosehip.”
“Oh? And where do you get him salmon?” Jimin perks up, his mouth watering at the corners at the thought of the pink, juicy fish.
Salmon is a delicacy, so obviously, Jimin loves it. Their village is located relatively close to the ocean—the hunters say it’s only a three-day-long run away—so every autumn, salmon migrate up the river to spawn. Autumn is the best time to catch them before they die. If the wolves are too late, they have to wait until the eggs hatch and the juvenile fish grow, but even when they become big enough to be worth an effort, they won’t taste the same as the salmon that make it to the ocean to mature—just to migrate back years later to complete the cycle of spawning.
Catching salmon needs equal skills and patience, and its difficulty surpasses most alpha’s capabilities. Coincidentally, alphas measure their strength by killing mountain sized bears, so hardly any of them even tries to learns how to fish. Most of them don’t even know what salmon tastes like. Jimin only knows because his omega dad used to enjoy catching them. They used to grill them above small fires on the riverbank.
On the upside, the village kitchen never lacks elk, boar, rabbit, pheasant and wild duck meat. Bear meat isn’t edible, so those stupid alphas really are just killing innocent animals to show off like barbarians. If anyone asked Jimin, Jimin would tell them that even though the winters are cold, elk and rabbit furs are almost as warm as a bear’s pelt, and they’re a lot softer, too.
It’s a pity Jimin is about the only wolf in the pack who disapproves of the reckless murder of innocent wildlife.
“I catch them! Why do you think I’m always asking for a remedy for a runny nose?”
“I don’t know, allergies?” Jimin says with a shrug, once again suppressing the jealousy rising like bile inside him.
“Why the crestfallen face?”
“I thought you traded in the market. I’d have tried my luck with the fisher, too. I thought they might like herbs in exchange.” This pack might consist of incapable alphas, but there must be a pack out there that discovered how delicious the fatty fillets of salmon are.
Or maybe Jimin should learn how to catch them. If his dad could do it, and if <i>Hoseok</i> can do it, who says Jimin can’t?
“Tae likes them fresh, so I never looked for them at the market,” Hoseok replies, completely unaware of the salmon crisis Jimin is going through.
“Salmon is a lovely gift. Tae is lucky to have an alpha like you.”
“I’m sure alphas would stand in line to get you salmon, if you asked for them, you know,” Hoseok says while he packs all the herbs and tea Jimin gave him into his leather shoulder bag. “If only you’d socialise with someone other than that monster behind your cupboard.”
“Thanks, but no thanks,” Jimin says, now a pout finding a way to his face. “Jwi is actually pretty cute if only you’d give him a chance.”
“He chews your furniture and contaminates your food.”
“I’m pretty sure that the woodboring beetles are doing more damage to my furniture than my mouse, and he can’t contaminate my food because I keep everything in glass jars.”
“What is he munching on now, then?” Hoseok asks, his eyes thinning into suspicious lines.
“I leave him food to discover all over the house. I think it’s fun.”
“I think living alone is having a toll on you, Jimin-ah.”
“If you got what you needed and you only have insults left to tell me, then you can leave,” Jimin says, maybe just a fraction colder than intended.
He really hates it when his friends are right, especially when they paint a miserable image of him in front of Jeongguk. Jeongguk doesn’t need to know about any of what Hoseok is blabbering about; Jimin doesn’t want that kind of humiliation, especially since it’s only a matter of time before Jeongguk mates with his chosen omega.
(Not Jimin.)
“Jimin-ah...”
“I’ll see you next time. Bye.”
The air lifts as soon as Hoseok and Jeongguk walk out of his home. Jimin watches them from behind the curtain, eyes set on a particularly broad and muscled back, his heart aching for something he can’t have.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with the village centre, per se, except it’s always loud. Jimin flinches when a pair of pups runs past him, screeching like crows. He focuses on the road ahead of him, careful not to stumble over a rock or something, given that he can’t see what’s in front of his feet because of the gigantic basket he’s carrying with both arms wrapped around it.
He’ll stop by the kitchen to drop off the kitchen herbs, and then he’ll stop by Taehyung and Hoseok’s place. Not because he wants to see whether Hoseok remembered which herb is which, but because he’s familiar with the tantrum Taehyung will throw if he hears that Jimin braved society without visiting him. Also... from what he heard from Hoseok, Taehyung’s tummy is finally showing. As little as Jimin likes obnoxious pups, he wants to be with his friend every step of the way during his first pregnancy.
“Jimin-ah!” Seokjin announces his arrival as soon as his enormous basket squeezes through the backdoor of the kitchen.
“Hh-Hyung—” Jimin heaves in response.
He throws the heavy basket on the long counter, and it lands with a dull but loud thud, sending a cloud of herb dust and soil into the air. He sweeps his sweaty strands of black hair out of his forehead, fanning himself with his hand. The autumn equinox is weeks away, and though the trees have started to turn orange and yellow, the heat doesn’t want to mellow.
“I told you to wash them before you bring them into my kitchen,” the head chef complains as the layer of dirt settles on the floor and on the counter.
Jimin shakes his numb arms, willing life to return to them after carrying such a heavy thing through the village. And—oh. At the other end of the counter, where no people except Seokjin and his helpers are supposed to be, Jeon Jeongguk is bending over a big bowl of rice and meat. He watches the scene unfold between Jimin and their hyung with that brooding expression he always displays in Jimin’s presence.
Jimin is totally being judged for the extra work he’s causing their hyung.
Oh well. That’s not a good enough reason to stop Jimin from saying, “And I told you, I’m not your kitchen hand but your supplier, and I won’t participate in ruining the taste of my excellent quality herbs by subjecting them to pre-washing procedures. They’ll taste foul if you make them soggy days before cooking them.”
Seokjin gasps so loudly the people in the next room hear him. “Park Jimin, this is no way to talk to your hyung.”
“But you know I’m right. Also, consider this: I’m a one-omega business here. I plant the seeds, tend to the seedlings until they’re ready to harvest, I protect them from the scorching sun and the deadly raindrops, and then I harvest them, dry them, make balms, brews, and ointments for the healers, and deliver the rest to you without anyone coming to help me from your kitchen, all on my own... And you want me to wash them too, when you have a dozen kitchen helpers at your disposal to do it and to also sweep the floor?”
“If what Jimin-ssi is saying is true, then you’re very unfair to him, hyung,” Jeongguk grumbles from his spot at the table when Seokjin puffs his chest out and opens his mouth in retaliation.
“Oi, you betrayer, who do you think is the one that fills that bottomless hole that is your stomach every day?”
“Seems to me like it’s Jimin-ssi. Without his tasty herbs and expertise, the food you cook would be inedible.”
Jimin stares at the usually mute alpha, willing his heart to calm down. Any wolf with a conscience would stand up for him. The fact that Jeongguk did just means that somewhere in his stony chest, the heart of a decent person is still beating.
“I see how this is. Park Jimin, you’re turning my favourite dongsaeng against me.”
“First of all, ouch. I’m your dongsaeng too,” Jimin says. If the smile Jimin attaches to the statement isn’t completely genuine, nobody but he needs to know. “Second of all, I’m literally just standing here doing you a favour. Byugom-ssi never did deliveries. You could just ask Joon-hyung to grab the herbs on his way back from the forest. His biceps are thicker than my neck.”
“But then I’d see you even less,” Seokjin shoots back.
That’s not untrue. But when a hyung does nothing but complain when Jimin is doing a favour, visiting stops being tempting. It's been like this for a long time... And even if Jimin knows it's mostly his fault that things are like this between him and his friends, he can't change his nature. If he doesn't stand up for himself, no one will.
Or maybe Jimin is just too sensitive lately. Taehyung and Hoseok are happy and expecting, and he knows Seokjin and Namjoon are trying, too. When Jeongguk starts to court Yoongi, Jimin will be truly alone because he’ll be no one’s priority. He isn’t anyone’s priority right now either, but… still. There’s still a flimsy illusion he can cling to.
“Whatever. I’m leaving, and I’m taking this with me.”
On top of the gigantic basket is a wooden crate which Jimin packed full of the tea blend he gave Taehyung a few days ago. Hoseok reported back to him, saying that it was working like a spell even though the week wasn’t up yet, so Jimin made plenty more that would last his omega best friend for a while.
“You’re visiting Tae? What a coincidence! Jeongguk is heading that way, too!”
Jimin stares at the alpha in question, still nose-deep in his bowl and very much looking like he isn’t about to head anywhere. The spoon freezes in Jeongguk’s hand midway to his mouth. It’s really unfair that he looks great even with his mouth hanging open dumbly.
“I am...?”
“You are! Because you said you were meeting Joon to discuss the next hunting trip. We’re running low on elk meat, remember?”
“I don’t remember.”
“I don’t care. Get up and carry Jimin’s crate to your hyungs’ house. You had enough to eat and I’ve got to have my space back because I have five hundred hungry mouths to cook for. Got to prepare some of these herbs, too, and clean up the mess.”
Jeongguk’s reluctance is painfully apparent while he pushes away his half-eaten food with a grunt. This is going to be a long walk... An awkward one, too. At this point, Jimin would rather run a race with his full basket tied to his back than walk with Jeongguk.
When was the last time the two of them were alone?
Jimin doesn’t remember.
So, a long time ago.
“Come back for dinner, little one. There’ll be tomato soup, packed full of your delicious basil and oregano,” Seokjin tells him before he follows a grumpy Jeongguk outside.
Jimin wrinkles his nose. “I don’t like tomatoes, but see you on another day, hyung.”
On the way to his friends’ house, Jimin wonders, like an thousand times before, when exactly his friendship with Jeongguk went awry and whether it was entirely his fault. If maybe Jimin is misunderstanding him, if maybe his shyness amplified after he presented. That’s an old habit, finding excuses as to why they aren’t close anymore instead of accepting the cold, hard truth: that he disillusioned Jeongguk while he was angry at the world, but mostly at the Moon Goddess for taking his parents away.
Six years later, at the age of twenty-five, they are now strangers. If they didn’t share the same circle of friends, would they even look at each other as they passed on the street? Jeongguk probably wouldn’t—he probably hates Jimin’s opinionated personality and his fondness for herbs too much to willingly seek his presence.
Still, Jimin manages to steal a few glances at Jeongguk and pouts at the beauty of his longish black hair that curls around his ears, his prominent nose, and sharp, determined eyes that look everywhere except at Jimin.
It sucks when only half of a pair misses the other half.
Jimin stares in front of his feet the rest of the walk, only looking up when Jeongguk silently hands him back his crate, just to turn around and leave him at Hoseok and Taehyung’s porch with a tight-lipped “Say hello to Tae for me.”
“What’s with that face?” Taehyung asks as he watches Jimin preparing tea for the both of them.
Jimin shakes his head, hoping his eyes convey that he doesn’t want to talk about it.
During the thirteen steps it took Jimin to walk from where Jeongguk left him on the porch to the front door, Jimin has worked himself up into an annoyed state: if Jeongguk finds it such a torture to walk Jimin across the village, then he should have told Seokjin so. What kind of alpha lets an omega who isn’t his mate boss him around like that? And if he agreed to walk with Jimin, then he should have at least contained his disdain. It’s not like Jimin doesn’t already know that he bores Jeongguk an endless amount, but saying goodbye should be basic decency.
He snorts out loud, feeling like he’s one of those dragons from the legends that blow smoke and fire from their nostrils.
“Spill,” Taehyung prompts, shimmying in his seat, ready for the gossip.
The cup, filled with fragrant tea to the brim, smashes into the table in front of Taehyung unnecessarily hard, hot liquid splashing onto the hardwood table.
“I didn’t mean the tea. What got you so worked up?” he asks, laughing at Jimin’s misery.
Jimin grabs the kitchen towel from the edge of the table and soaks up the spilt tea angrily. “Just the usual,” he grumbles.
“Which usual? You have multiple 'usual' problems.”
Taehyung knows exactly which, he’s just thirstier for gossip than for Jimin’s homemade tea and wants Jimin to spell it out.
“It means that the older Jeon Jeongguk is, the ruder he becomes. Where does all that attitude come from, huh? His mum is the sweetest person ever and his dad is such a good alpha! Or am I tripping on mushrooms? Do I remember wrong?”
“You don’t remember wrong, and you definitely aren’t tripping on mushrooms,” Taehyung says nonchalantly. “I just think you misunderstand him.”
“What’s there to misunderstand? He’s got this pinched face every time he shares space with me, and he always looks grumpy when he’s being asked to give me a hand—not by me, by the way! I do not ask for his help, or need it, for your information! So, what the fuck is his issue?”
“As I said, I think there’s a misunderstanding.”
“It’s clear as water to me.”
Taehyung sips his tea and Jimin slides into the opposite chair, his lips smacking together around the tasty tea when he finally gets a calming taste.
“You’re hyper-focusing on him because your world literally only consists of him, me, and Hobi. You hardly even see the rest of the hyungs, let alone the other pack members. They only know you’re still alive because the infirmary hasn’t run out of remedies yet.”
“That’s not true.”
“Oh, they ran out?”
Jimin narrows his eyes when Taehyung challenges him by quirking both of his eyebrows.
“I’m in the village at least once a week.”
“Okay, but when was the last time you met someone because you wanted to, not because you had to? Asking this completely aware that the only reason you’re still visiting me is because you’re scared I’d hunt you down if you didn't, even when I’m pregnant.”
“That’s not true either... I want to see you through your pregnancy and help you.”
“And I appreciate that. But when was the last time you went on a date with someone? Let someone court you? You should have a pup growing inside you, too.”
“I’m fine without any of that.”
Taehyung’s eyes transform into a pair of thin lines, suspiciously similar to Jimin’s.
“If you truly were, you wouldn’t care whether Jeongguk liked you or not.”
“I’m fine alone, and without him,” Jimin insists.
“You have a pet mouse.”
“Jwi is great to live with. He’s cute and a good listener, and I never come home to him making a mess of my house or demanding I cook dinner. Show me an alpha who is capable of all of that.”
“Not everyone is an idiot, you know,” Taehyung says, going for a strict face but giggling when Jimin stays serious.
“Hobi normally isn’t an idiot—only when it comes to mean spirits—and Joon is a good alpha too, but the list ends here,” Jimin admits.
“What about Jeongguk?”
“You can’t be serious,” Jimin shoots back, rolling his eyes.
“What’s wrong with Jeongguk?” Taehyung asks, suddenly just as offended as Jimin. Makes sense, given that the alpha is Taehyung’s childhood best friend, too.
“Did you not listen to what I said five minutes ago? If we ignore the fact that he hates me and call it a ‘misunderstanding’,” Jimin harps with air quotes, “then take this: he’ll mate Yoongi-hyung soon.”
Taehyung chokes on his sip of tea, and momentarily forgetting that he’s upset, Jimin runs around the table to smack his best friend’s back to help him through it.
“I swear to the Goddess a bison is easier to knock sense into than you,” Taehyung says when he regains his ability to breathe and talk. “Do you know what you need? A reality check.”
“No. What I need is for everyone to get off my back.”
“Wait a second, I just had the most brilliant idea!” the other exclaims, completely ignoring Jimin’s request. “I know plenty of alphas from Hobi’s hunting squad. I can set you up on dates. That would be so good! Goddess knows you need a release for all of this pent-up frustration.”
“You want me to beat up alphas?” Jimin asks, ready to cry. This conversation is getting worse and worse by the minute. It's going nowhere.
“What? No! Are you insane? Sit on their faces so they eat you out until you squirt slick all over them!”
“This is supposed to be less insane?!” Jimin shrieks. He can’t believe the person who knows him the best would suggest something like that. “Is this a sexual fantasy of yours? Is your libido out of hand because of your pregnancy? Do you need tea for that, too?”
“No! It should be your fantasy, too.”
“It shouldn’t. I’ll sit only on my mate’s face.”
“And who do you think that mate will be if you never meet anyone?”
Not Jeongguk, that’s for sure.
Jimin remains stubbornly silent, hoping against all odds that Taehyung will drop the topic.
He doesn’t.
“Let me set you up with some hot alphas. You can have fun with them without actually fucking them. You won’t know how cathartic a good orgasm is until you have one—”
“Thanks, but I can get myself off just fine—” Jimin interjects.
“—and no, your fist doesn’t count as a partner. It’s the best stress relief. It’ll make you feel like a whole new person.”
Jimin isn’t sure he wants to be a whole new person. He just always thought that he’d be free to be himself and be someone’s mate soon. But it’s been ‘soon’ for six whole years already...
Maybe Taehyung is right.
“Hey...” Taehyung’s voice comes gentler than Jimin expects. “I know you, remember? Even if you put up a brave face and run your big mouth, I know that you’re hurting. So, trust me, okay? I have a plan.”
The fight leaves Jimin at once. He nods at Taehyung’s words because he knows he doesn’t have another choice. And also, despite everything, he trusts Taehyung to not set him up for failure.
“I know I have a lot of flaws, but I just want someone to love me like Hobi-hyung loves you,” he admits quietly.
“I know, Jimin-ah. We all have flaws, yeah? Believe me when I say that the right person will love you with yours.”
“Okay...” Jimin finally gives in.
He loves Jwi, but maybe a human-wolf companion would benefit him more.
There are peculiar things in the world that Park Jimin will never understand.
One of them is why a person with a disdain for him keeps accompanying Hoseok whenever he stops by Jimin’s place. But because Jeon Jeongguk will forever remain a mystery and he’s like a magnet to Jimin’s eyes, he fails to ignore his looming form in the corner of the kitchen, his eyes flitting to him time and time again while he tries to focus on Hoseok.
“Do you have something stronger than basil? No offence Jimin-ah, but I’m not sure it’s working, even though I hung it exactly how you said.”
“Hmm…” Jimin contemplates with the serious face this issue requires. “Have you discovered more evil spirits in your house since you hung it?”
“My things continue to go missing, and I don’t care what Tae says, I remember where I leave them. I don’t just misplace my equipment for hunting. I suspect it must be the spirit of an animal I killed that is pranking me. I don’t reckon you have herbs to reveal what sort of spirit they are and what they want? I worry about Tae’s safety.”
Jimin is pretty certain that even if spirits exist, an animal spirit wouldn’t play tricks on folk like them.
“I’m not a witch,” Jimin lets him know kindly. He enjoys watching Hoseok's ghost hunting escapades, but he isn't cruel. “So, I don’t know how to identify evil animal spirits, but if you think the basil isn’t effective enough, maybe you can hang rosemary on the other side of your front door. You can also burn incense in the rooms you suspect are haunted. That should help you make peace with the spirit and help it move on. I can make a mixture for you. Intentions are key when you burn it and spread its smoke through your rooms, so you must firmly intend the spirit to go away and find peace elsewhere.”
“You won’t mix frankincense in it, right?”
“Frankincense is the most effective burnable cleanser, and smoke is the most effective space cleansing tool, so I will.”
“I should have known.”
Jimin hums happily while he collects the jars of sun-dried herbs that he needs for the mixture, ignoring how his skin crawls pleasantly when he brushes up against a stoic Jeongguk to reach a specific jar.
“I hate that smell,” Hoseok complains when Jimin removes the lid from the frankincense resins.
“I’m sorry.”
Both alphas watch Jimin silently while he works. He just needs to add three pinches of mugwort and then the mixture is—
There’s a shriek, so high and loud that Jimin accidentally knocks the wooden mixing bowl off the work desk, its contents spilling all over the floor. Hoseok clambers onto the kitchen table, and from the corner of his eyes, Jimin sees a bewildered smudge of brown zoom across the floor and disappear under a cupboard.
“Stop shrieking, you’re scaring my mouse!” He complains.
“SCARING YOUR MOUSE? What about me? I’m scared!”
“You’re a grown alpha, and he’s just a mouse! Which one of you do you think stands more chance against the other in a battle?”
Hoseok sneers, but he scrambles off the table and straightens his clothes and hair as if he didn’t just scream like a pup.
“Hyung, are you sure your evil spirit isn’t just another mouse?” Jeongguk asks from the background.
Jimin would laugh if he wasn’t still so scandalised on Jwi’s behalf. Or maybe not. What fool laughs at the joke of a person who hates him?
“I’m sorry I ruined your herbs,” Hoseok says with a grounding sigh and crouches on the now mouse-free floor to clean up the mess. He feels so guilty he doesn’t even care about touching the frankincense, so Jimin reluctantly forgives him.
“It’s okay. I’ll make you a new batch.”
“Oh, by the way, do you know Han Jiwoon?” Hoseok asks out of nowhere, emptying his hands over the basket in which Jimin collects rubbish.
“Not really? He’s from your hunting squad, right? The tall one?”
“Yeah! He would love to have lunch with you one of these days.”
“Why?” Jimin asks grumpily, his mood instantly souring. He doesn’t want to walk all the way to the village centre just to spend ten minutes eating lunch in the hall with a stranger.
“Because Tae said you were horny and wanted to spice up your life, and Jiwoon has been asking me about you ever since he saw you and Tae walking to the infirmary together.”
“Is that what Tae is spreading about me?! Because that’s not how it is! I’m not horny!” Jimin shrieks, mortified. His face flames, and he hopes the earth will swallow him before Jeongguk judges him based on a lie.
“Please don’t kill the messenger, I only know what Tae tells me!” Hoseok says, suddenly taking a step back, as if viewing Jimin as part of the many threats looming in this cottage, as dangerous as his bloodthirsty little mouse.
Jeongguk’s shadow mocks him in the corner persistently, his judgemental eyes narrowing into thin slits.
Actually, you know what, what the fuck?! Even if Jimin was horny—which he isn’t—it wouldn’t be anyone’s business, least of all Jeon Jeongguk’s. Why doesn’t he go eavesdrop to hear about Yoongi’s horniness instead of turning Jimin’s life even more miserable?!
If Jimin cracks chilli flakes into the blend of incense alongside the juniper berries, he does that hoping both Hoseok and Taehyung will have itchy eyes for a week after burning it.
Taehyung wants to spice up Jimin’s life? Ha! Jimin will give him spice.
“Okay. What about the day after tomorrow?” he asks sweetly, acting nice just to...
Why exactly?
Ah, right.
To show Jeongguk that Jimin won’t be the leftover omega in their group of seven. Jeongguk wants to be with Yoongi? That’s fine, but Jimin won’t let that make him look undesirable for everyone else.
“I’ll let him know, but I’m sure he’ll make time for you. I’ll tell him to come pick you up from here,” Hoseok says after he tucks the spicy incense blend and the rosemary into his bag.
Jeongguk eyes Jimin for a suspiciously long time before he follows his friend out, and Jimin is convinced Jeongguk noticed the trick with the chilli and will tell on him at the first chance he gets.
“Doesn’t your back ache?” Yoongi is a healer, so he gives a mean massage, and he’s also right. Indeed, Jimin’s back is aching very much. “It feels like I’m trying to massage a bear with all this rigid muscle mass around the shoulders and neck.” For demonstration, he presses his thumbs into those very painful spots until they pop even more painfully under the pressure.
“Didn’t know hyung’s hobby was to massage bears…” Jimin squeezes through his gritted teeth.
“Stop being a smartass.”
Why is it that every friend is giving Jimin the mean treatment lately? He can’t have a conversation without them criticising some part of him. His life might not be up to par with their standards, and he might also have a sharper tongue than them, but that doesn’t justify the way they talk to him.
Jimin’s back and shoulders might ache, and he might spend more time with Jwi than with other wolves, but he’d like to be talked to nicely. Not even always, just sometimes.
He ignores the little voice at the back of his head that tells him he should stop being difficult if he wants people to be nice to him.
“You seem particularly stressed lately. Is everything okay? Is the garden too much to take care of alone?” Yoongi keeps asking while he kneads Jimin’s muscles until they slowly soften and relax. “Have you thought about accepting an apprentice?”
“I’m twenty-five,” Jimin replies. He flinches internally at the tone of his voice: unreasonably defensive when his friend only worries about his well-being. Still, he doesn’t stop his mouth from running. “What do I need an apprentice for?”
“You won’t stay twenty-five forever.”
“Old herbalist Byugom accepted me as his apprentice when he was seventy. I was his first and only apprentice.”
“You aren’t Byugom.”
Yes, Jimin is painfully aware. Old herbalist Byugom was a beta with a body built for gardening. On the other hand, Jimin is slim, even if he feels like he’s packing more muscles than any other omega in the pack, thanks to the heavy baskets he carries to the village once a week. He visits both the kitchen and the infirmary every two weeks, so since he’s been to the kitchen last week, the infirmary is where he is now, a week later.
He’ll admit that carrying the basket can be a source of his shoulder and neck pain, though.
“Who even would be my apprentice? The only reason the head alpha allowed me to be the new herbalist was because nobody else wanted the job. And I love doing it. My appa taught me about all sorts of plants in the forest when I was small, and I’m not lying when I say that being among my herbs is calming, so can we please stop making an issue where there’s none?”
“Okay.” Yoongi accepts his pleading surprisingly quickly. “Here’s another fun topic for you. Someone told me you’re going on a lunch date with Han Jiwoon tomorrow.”
“Taehyung has such a runny mouth. Does the entire village know about it already?”
“I don’t know it from Taehyung.”
“Then Hobi. They’re two peas in a pod.”
“Nope, I didn’t hear it from Hobi either.”
“Then really the entire village knows about it. Everyone will watch us at lunch, mark my words. I want to die.”
“Don’t die yet. Do you know why it’s worth sitting through dubious lunch dates?”
Jimin grunts.
“Because of the ridiculous number of gifts that will flow in once an alpha starts courting you.”
“How do you know that?” Jimin grumbles absent-mindedly. For once, his hyung is kneading a spot that feels good.
“Don’t tell anyone, especially not Tae and Hobi, but someone left a courting gift at my door yesterday morning.”
Oh.
Oh.
“Oh...”
“That’s it? That’s all I get? An unenthusiastic ‘oh’ after my pep-talk? You’re the first person I’m telling about the courting.”
Jimin’s heart sinks, and his mood, which hasn’t been soaring, plummets even more. So, it’s happening. It’s really happening. Jimin truly doesn’t have a chance with Jeongguk anymore, even if his wolf doesn’t want to hear a word of it. He wonders if Taehyung knew about the alpha’s intentions, and that’s why he’s eager to set Jimin up with other people—hoping that Jimin will forget Jeongguk before the news of him courting Yoongi becomes a topic of gossip in the village.
The worst thing—not counting the fact that it’s now confirmed that Jimin can’t have Jeongguk—is that he’s sitting here being jealous and too proud to congratulate his friend when he deserves it. It’s not Yoongi’s fault that Jimin’s so hung up on an impossible crush.
“I’m sorry... I’m really happy for you,” he manages to say without choking.
He wishes Yoongi would go back to squeezing the aching spots in his shoulders so Jimin would have a valid reason to cry.
Jimin wakes up determined the next morning: it’s a new day and the start of a new life.
He wears his good breeches and tunic, shades of green that enhance his black hair and eyes. He tries not to overthink during the hours until noon, but it’s hard not to when Jimin wants to show the world—but mostly himself—that he’s perfectly capable of finding happiness next to an alpha who isn’t his childhood best friend slash crush.
He occupies himself by turning over the herbs on the large sheets at the back, where he laid them out for the sun to dry them. He’s got to use the weather to his advantage for as long as he can; once the cold season comes, the sun will lose its warmth.
Jiwoon knocks on the door at that narrow time of the day when shadows disappear completely. Seeing his face, Jimin can associate him with memories, mostly from school. Jimin thinks they might be the same age, and the conversation dies after they confirm that.
To the alpha’s benefit, he’s trying. Hoseok probably wasn’t making things up when he said Jiwoon had been asking about him. He looks interested and asks decent questions. So, by the time they walk past the first buildings on their way to the village centre, Jimin decides he’ll give him an honest chance.
Their legs take them straight to the dining hall where Jiwoon sits Jimin at a small table to ensure some sort of privacy. They’ll need it, going by how everyone who passes their table stares at Jimin while the alpha is away bringing them food. Jimin can’t blame them; he is an odd sight in the dining hall. He rarely eats here, preferring to cook at home from the ingredients that Seokjin regularly gives him in exchange for herbs.
All of that skips his mind when he spots Yoongi with Jeongguk a few tables in front of him, seemingly unaware of Jimin’s presence behind them. The pain he felt yesterday suddenly returns tenfold, and he’s grateful when Jiwoon returns with two large wooden plates packed with so much food Jimin can’t eat in a week.
It’s the action that matters and the thought behind it, so Jimin accepts it with a smile. Not knowing what meat Jimin liked, Jiwoon picked a bit of everything. There are cuts of rabbit saddle and Jimin picks those, munching on them with potatoes and other grilled vegetables. No matter how much he loves to cook at home, Seokjin will always remain the best chef he knows.
They talk about the different cuts of meats, and then the conversation morphs into a talk of hunting. Jiwoon describes how to best kill each and every type of animal in so much detail that Jimin’s appetite disappears and he thinks he’ll never be able to look at meat the same way. Whatever little interest he’s had in the alpha dwindles, and when they both can’t eat more, he thanks Jiwoon for his time and refuses to be walked back home.
The only thing spicy about this date were the meatballs, and Jimin has half a mind to stop by at Taehyung’s to let his disappointment in his match-making skills known, but then decides it’s wiser to just walk back home quietly.
It’s not like Jimin will get any sort of sympathy from him.
There’s a new alpha waiting for Jimin at his door just a few days later. This one is called Lee Sooyun, and she’s cute for an alpha. She’s genuinely interested in Jimin’s herbs, and she’s willing to listen to Jimin drone about how awesomely versatile most of them are in their usage. They spend an entire afternoon in Jimin’s garden and she even helps him organise the heavier equipment in the little shed at the very back.
Jimin enjoys every second of their time together. It’s just a pity that he is more into male alphas. He feels bad for a minute because he doesn’t have experience in the field where gender differences matter the most, but... wolves know what they like without having to experience sex, right?
At least that’s what Sooyun says when Jimin stumbles over his own words, trying to explain how he feels when the sun goes down.
They hug at the front door, and that’s the best hug Jimin received in a long time—he refuses to think it’s the only hug he has gotten lately. They promise to stay in touch as friends, so at least Sooyun gets something out of this date, too.
The third alpha is a male and appears at Jimin’s door exactly two days after Sooyun stopped by. He’s a hunter just about to leave for a hunting trip, but he insists on seeing Jimin beforehand and promises that any game he catches will be dedicated to him.
“If I find a bear, I’ll take it down and bring you back its gorgeous pelt. I’ll work it into the warmest, finest coat for you to wear during the cold months,” he promises at the edge of the forest, where the other hunters are gathering and sharing plans and strategies.
To Jimin’s misfortune, this alpha—is his name Heesuk?—is in the same hunting squad as Jeongguk, Hoseok, Namjoon, and Jiwoon. And all of them are watching him from their respective spots.
Heesuk makes a show of warming up his body, already half-naked and puffing his chest out to make his muscles look even more pronounced while simultaneously doing push-ups. Inch by inch, Jimin puts more space between them.
“Was this loser your idea?” He hisses to Hoseok once he shuffles close enough to where he’s standing next to Jeongguk.
“I swear he’s usually not this cringy.”
“He wants to kill a bear for me!” Jimin complains. “Must he really kill an animal out of sheer selfishness? What good will its death serve if we can’t eat its meat?”
“I’m so sorry,” his friend says, and he sounds genuine. “I know you love every animal and find no pleasure in the killing of innocents for sport, but you know the tradition. The bigger the kill is, the stronger the alpha is considered in the pack. And when an alpha has an omega to impress, they go for the bears and the mountain lions.”
“I don’t care. I can’t respect an alpha who kills for sport. Everyone can train to be strong, but the real strength is in their kindness. If someone doesn’t have a kind heart, I don’t want him anywhere near me. If the Goddess didn’t mean for us to eat the meat of all animals, those animals shall live undisturbed. If that clown brings me a bear, I’ll murder him and offer his blood to the Moon Goddess in exchange for the freedom of the poor bear’s soul, I swear to you.”
“I’ll talk to him,” Hoseok says hastily and jogs away towards Heesuk. For a moment, Jimin wonders whether his upset little speech was effective or if Hoseok is afraid that the bear’s spirit will join the other one to haunt him, too.
Only Jimin and Jeongguk remain in their spot. Collecting all of his courage, Jimin faces the alpha and finds him already looking at him. Their eyes lock for a second, and Jimin thinks there’s a connection, but then Jeongguk looks away just as quickly. Guilt tears into Jimin’s heart because once again, he’s hoping for something he should not hope for from Min Yoongi’s alpha.
“You haven’t changed one bit,” Jeongguk says.
It’s more like a grunt, really. But he’s smiling.
Is this supposed to be a compliment or an insult?
Jimin will never know because Jeongguk walks away, seeking Namjoon’s company instead of his.
Feeling utterly stupid and out of place, Jimin scurries as far away from the hunting squad as he can before Heesuk notices.
Jimin’s had enough. If any more alphas knock on his door, he’ll send them right back to Taehyung and Hoseok with a piece of his mind.
Seems as though his friends sense his disappointment because the next three middays pass uneventfully.
“You’re so lucky,” he tells Jwi when he pokes his whiskers out next to the leg of a cupboard. “I bet your friends don’t make you go on stupid dates with stupid mice.”
The sun is already setting when someone knocks on the door. His friends let themselves into Jimin’s cottage without knocking, so it’s not one of them. Already riling himself up and practising a rude line in his head to disillusion the newest alpha his friends intend for him, he tears the door open roughly just to find nobody on his porch.
He bristles and scoffs at the thought of unregulated pups playing pranks when he smells it.
The unmistakable scent of fish.
He looks down at his feet and that’s when he sees the woven basket with the big, fat salmon in it, carefully de-scaled and gutted, ready to fillet and grill.
Jimin snaps his head up, scanning the meadow and the line of woods along the dusty road in the distance for the person who left this fish on his porch but sees no one.
It has to have been Hoseok, in a hurry to get home with the freshly caught game to make Taehyung happy. He must have remembered Jimin craving salmon a few weeks ago, and he caught one for him, too.
“Thank you so much...” he whispers to the empty meadow before he picks the basket up and hugs it close to his chest, kicking the door closed behind him.
He grills a juicy fillet right away, salts the rest and leaves it in the coldest room built into the ground underneath his feet where the food won’t go bad so quickly.