Chapter Text
Jisung was exhausted. It was early morning and he was making the walk of shame back to his apartment. He promised himself he wasn’t going to do this again, but alcohol was a bad influence.
He had gone out the night before with his roommates Felix, Seungmin and Hyunjin. He really had no intention of going home with a random guy. Before leaving the house, he even told them he was done with that. But all of it seemed to fly out the window when a cute guy started flirting with him. Felix tried to stop him but Hyunjin and Seungmin, of course, encouraged it.
He groaned as his head throbbed, trying to hold back his nauseousness. He was expecting everyone to still be asleep, so it startled him when Felix was sitting at the counter scrolling through his phone.
Felix’s eyes lifted to him, shaking his head with a smile.
“You’re back early.”
“You’re up early,” he retorted, and Felix shrugged.
“Hyunjin was taking up all of my bed,” he groaned, and that made Jisung's eyes go wide with surprise. Felix’s face turned a little red. “He just passed out on my bed because he was drunk, it’s not what you think.”
Jisung sighed with a soft smile, taking a seat across from him. Felix ignored his sympathetic eyes, taking a sip from his coffee mug. Jisung had been trying to get Felix to confess his feelings for Hyunjin for almost two years now. He was still waiting for the inevitable moment. But Felix was shy and Hyunjin was an idiot.
“Anyway, how was your night?” Felix asked then and Jisung rested his pounding head on the counter.
“From what I remember, not that great.”
He recalled that the guy could barely get it up since he had been drinking so much. Jisung had to do most of the work too. It ended up being more exhausting than enjoyable. He didn’t even help get him off after he finished.
“I thought you were done with random hook ups?” Felix frowned at him. Jisung knew he wasn’t a huge fan of him sleeping around. It wasn’t really his business if he were being honest, even though he knew he was just worried. He was single, young and dumb and finding the right guy was hard. He wasn’t sure if he would ever find someone who was perfect for him.
“I know, he was cute though,” he told him, but even though he was cute, he definitely wasn’t worth it. Felix just finished his coffee, standing to refill his mug.
“I thought you were trying to find a nice guy?” Felix asked him then, and Jisung shrugged his shoulders.
He did say that, after he had broken up with his boyfriend who was a complete and total asshole. Unfortunately, he was incredibly hot and knew just what Jisung liked in bed, but he was mean and belittled him whenever they would argue. Hyunjin almost punched him in the face when he heard him degrade Jisung for his looks and his weight in front of them. Felix always had to hold Hyunjin back when his ex was around, especially when he put his hands on him. That’s when he knew that he had to break up with him.
It was common for Jisung to fall for looks without considering their personality. He liked a pretty face. He also liked a dominant guy in bed, and those jerks definitely knew how to give it to him the way he liked.
Felix was extremely worried for him when he dated a guy who laid a hand on him every time he got angry.
After that, he promised them he would find someone who deserved him.
But it was hard to find someone he was interested in for more than one night. It was also hard to find someone who didn’t treat him like shit, was good looking and knew how to fuck him right.
“You know I’m not good at that,” he chuckled, thinking about his shitty past boyfriends.
“Maybe you should try a dating app,” he suggested, and Jisung made an uninterested face.
“I don’t know, I probably don’t even have time for a relationship right now,” he mumbled as Felix handed him a mug full of water, denying the coffee since it would definitely stir up the sickness in his stomach.
His senior year of college started tomorrow and he was working a part time job at a local music store to help pay for tuition. He also coached a youth soccer team, which he had been doing for years now, and the first practice was tomorrow too. He decided he was way too busy for any kind of relationship.
“Yeah, I get it,” Felix nodded, because he was starting his final year of college tomorrow as well, “I just hope you meet someone who’s right for you.”
“Thanks Felix,” Jisung smiled at him, because he knew Felix just wanted him to be loved and happy.
He instantly frowned when his head had a striking pain. He groaned and placed his face in his hands.
“I’ll get you some ibuprofen.”
Jisung thanked him once again for being an amazing friend as he left the room to grab the medication.
Jisung loved coaching. He also loved kids. He always looked forward to this time of the year. He loved meeting his new players and reuniting with his returning ones.
He coached a boys youth team from ages seven to nine. They were definitely a handful, but it was always a great time since they were always full of energy.
He was going over the roster, and he noticed he had seven new players this year.
His assistant coach Changbin, a friend from high school, was helping him set up a few drills before the kids arrived.
“Okay, I think everything is all set.” Changbin brushed his hands on his shorts, the dirt from last season was still caked all over the orange cones.
“Sweet, the parents will be here soon,” Jisung mentioned. Every year, they would meet the parents and hand out the practice times and game schedules. It was also nice to meet the adults of the children he was responsible for a few nights a week.
Jisung had introduced himself. His smile was bright and warm as always. He knew how to draw people in. Not only was it important to inspire the kids, but the parents needed to be motivated as well. It helped when the parents were involved and excited about their child’s team. Their enthusiasm was crucial. He needed them to bring their kids to practice. He needed their support and cheering on the sidelines. He also wanted them to feel comfortable and confident leaving their child in his care. Their trust in him was just as important. And he wanted everyone to have fun.
He was one of the more popular coaches in the lineup. Everyone wanted their kid to play on his team. He was definitely the youngest coach, at only twenty-one, but he knew his stuff. He had played when he was a kid. He had been coaching since he was eighteen, and his team had finished in the top three every year.
Practice was going well. Most of the older kids were easily dribbling through the cones, and the returning players were helping the new ones learn the drills. Jisung was observing his players, and he noticed one who was nervously dribbling by himself.
There were twenty kids on his roster, but three of them were absent tonight, therefore there was an odd number. He was one of his new players this year, and he was mostly keeping to himself. Number twelve. He checked his clipboard for his name.
“Jeongin!” he yelled out, startling the boy slightly. He looked up, panicked, and Jisung could see him swallow nervously. He didn’t say anything, he just stared back with an uncertain expression as Jisung was jogging over to him.
“Let’s do some passes together,” he smiled at him, and Jeongin nodded quickly. He could see how shaky he was. He noticed on his player information sheet that he was his youngest member.
He was definitely struggling to keep the ball under control, and he was sure he had never touched a soccer ball before tonight. Which wasn’t a problem. This was a recreational league, so he had a lot of experience with completely new players. He liked teaching kids to fall in love with the sport.
“So, Jeongin,” he spoke as he passed the ball back to him softly so he wouldn’t miss it, “how old are you?” He already knew the answer, but he wanted to get him comfortable and talking. It took him a minute but he eventually spoke, his voice tiny.
“I’m seven.” He stumbled as he passed the ball back, Jisung easily catching it under his cleats.
“Is there any position you’re interested in playing?” he asked then, and Jeongin just shrugged.
“I…I don’t know. I don’t play soccer.” He frowned, and Jisung could see him blush slightly. Jisung smiled, trying to ease his nerves, but he wasn’t sure if it was working.
“That’s okay. We’ll learn which one fits you best as we practice these next few weeks,” he assured him, and that made Jeongin smile slightly.
He could tell that he was still nervous as they continued to practice together. He could practically see his anxiousness as the other players tried to talk to him. He barely made eye contact and isolated himself whenever he could.
The end of practice finally came around and Jisung was watching as the kids were reunited with their parents. After most parents had picked up their kids, he noticed Jeongin was still sitting on the sideline bench instead of playing with some of the others who were messing with the ball waiting for their parents to show up.
He sighed seeing that sad look on his face.
“Is everything okay?” Jisung asked, and Jeongin was clenching his hands together.
“Yeah.” He clearly wasn’t in the mood to talk, but Jisung couldn’t help but feel like he had the responsibility to make him feel better.
“You did really great today, especially for your first practice.” He tried to cheer him up, but Jeongin just shook his head.
“I don’t really like soccer.” He frowned, and that made Jisung frown too, seeing his upset face.
“No? Why not?” he asked then. He knew sometimes that parents would place their kids in soccer to get them to try a sport or just get them out of the house to be active for a few hours a week. Jisung always tried to make it as fun as possible so the kids would fall in love with the sport, but he could see in Jeongin’s demeanor and expression that he really didn’t want to be there.
But Jeongin just shrugged, not answering his question. He noticed then that Jeongin’s eyes sparkled suddenly. Before Jisung could say anything else he was jumping up from the bench. His gaze followed as the young boy slammed himself into a man approaching from across the field. He smiled as he watched him grip onto him tightly.
He could see him kneel down, running a hand through his black hair, tussling it gently. Jisung stood up then, making his way over to them.
“Hi, you must be Jeongin’s father?” he questioned, and when their eyes connected Jisung couldn’t believe how attractive he was. He felt like his breath left his body as he smiled at him, his dimple prominent and bold. His eyes crinkled slightly, and Jisung was pretty sure he was the hottest man he had ever seen. He was still wearing his suit, likely from work, and Jisung bit his lip, his mind immediately wandering.
But he pushed those thoughts away immediately, remembering Jeongin, one of his young players, standing right there staring up at them.
“Hi, yes, my name is Minho,” he introduced himself, and Jisung gave him an even bigger grin.
“It’s nice to meet you. I’m Han Jisung. Jeongin did really amazing tonight. I was impressed.”
Maybe he was lying a little bit, but there was no harm in making Jeongin feel a little more confident in himself and making his dad feel proud. He felt successful because he did receive a smile from both of them.
Minho was then kneeling down again, placing a hand on Jeongin’s shoulder.
“Hey bud, why don’t you go to the car and I’ll be right there? Your favorite snack is in the front seat, you can have it.”
“Really? Before dinner?” he asked excitedly, and Minho nodded with a smile. Jeongin was then taking off for the car in an instant.
“He’s a really sweet kid,” Jisung told him then, and Minho smiled after him.
“How was he really today?” he asked him with a little concern. Jisung blinked back at him with a small shrug.
“He was fine, really. He was a little nervous, but that’s normal for new players. I’m positive he'll warm up soon.” He tried to assure him, but Minho just rubbed the back of his neck.
“He struggles with meeting new people. I was hoping maybe a sport would open him up a little.” He seemed like he was conflicted, like maybe he made the wrong choice. Jisung didn’t like the expression on his face, wanting that pretty smile from earlier to come back.
“He was a little bit shy, but we practiced together and we talked a bit. I wouldn’t worry too much. The other kids are really kind, they’ll take him under their wing, and so will I.” He tried to be as supportive as possible, but he couldn’t help but notice Minho’s eyes were wide with surprise.
“He talked with you?” he asked, and Jisung cocked his head to the side in confusion.
“Yeah, just a bit. I asked him what position he was interested in but he doesn’t seem to know the sport well yet, but that’s no problem,” he explained but Minho was still shocked.
“He hasn’t spoken to anyone other than me in almost three years.” Minho was staring at him, his eyes searching his face. That made Jisung's heart burst. Not only because this attractive man was looking at him with wonder, but also because he had no idea that Jeongin was that antisocial.
“Oh…” he really had no idea what to say. He noticed Minho was smiling again, and that made him blush a little.
“Thank you,” he said suddenly. Jisung shook his head, his hand came up to his face to try and hide his small blush.
“Oh, I…It’s no problem. I just tried to make him feel as comfortable as possible. I want him to have fun, and I want you to know that he’s having fun too,” he smiled back, and Minho was looking at him so fondly, he might start to get the wrong idea. They stared at each other for a moment, and Jisung could feel his heartbeat go wild in his chest.
“Well, I should get back to the car.” Minho threw his thumb over his shoulder, where his car was parked and Jeongin was waiting for him.
“Yeah absolutely. I’ll see you both on Wednesday? Practice is at six,” he asked and Minho was shaking his head yes immediately.
“We’ll be there.”
Sometimes, Jisung couldn’t help but become obsessed with certain people. Especially people he found incredibly attractive. Ever since Monday, he couldn’t stop thinking about Minho. His pretty face. His lithe body. His perfect smile. His beautiful eyes. It was ridiculous actually. But he knew he was off limits. There was no way he could even consider it. Those thoughts were immediately shoved down when he thought about Jeongin’s innocent face.
But unfortunately, they kept popping back up whenever he would pick him up from practice. Minho had even stayed for practice sometimes, and he swore he could feel his eyes on him. Maybe he was just being delusional.
His final roster ended up being nineteen players, because of course someone had quit. It happened every so often, and it hurt his heart to know that he couldn’t make it work. But it was inevitable that it wouldn’t work for everyone.
He was just happy that Jeongin decided to stick with it. He was still as unsure as day one, and he didn’t talk to anyone. Just like Minho had said. He barely even talked to him, only sometimes, but he was an incredibly quiet kid. He knew pushing him to speak when he didn’t want to wouldn’t be helpful to anyone.
He preferred to be alone, and Jisung could see that. He refused to pair up, unless Jisung chose a partner for him, and he knew the other kids thought he was weird. He didn’t seem to mind it much when Jisung would practice with him though. In fact, he seemed more comfortable. In soccer, communication is key. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy to get him to open up, but he was determined to do so.
Currently, they were playing a scrimmage match and Jisung was observing as they ran back and forth on the field. He couldn’t help but let his eyes linger a little longer on Jeongin, who seemed confused no matter what position he tried. He was pretty confident with his other players, knowing where they would excel, but right now, he wasn’t sure if Jeongin could be good in any of them. Changbin must have seen the concerned look on his face because he was bumping his shoulder.
“I’m thinking maybe we could try him as a striker, it might give him a chance to build his confidence,” he offered his idea, and Jisung sighed deeply.
“I’m not sure. He’s timid, we could start him off in midfield, keep him running and focused,” he suggested and Changbin seemed to be contemplating it.
“That could work. There’s no way we can put him on defense. If he gets burned in a game and they score, it might strip away any sort of confidence he has.”
“I agree.” Jisung watched as that exact scenario just happened. Jeongin looked absolutely flustered as one of his best players flew past him. He was just thankful the goalie made a save.
Changbin was then writing down on his clipboard, tapping his pen as he finished.
“Alright, midfield it is.” He was then making his way down the field and began to observe the other players. Jisung sighed as he was still watching Jeongin, his face blushed red, likely from embarrassment and less from lack of breath due to running. He hoped he hadn’t seen the concern on his face.
Their first game was the week after next, and he knew that they were running out of time. He really thought he would have gotten a little better, but honestly, there wasn’t much improvement since his first practice.
He blew his whistle, signaling that practice was over for the evening. He noticed out of the corner of his eye Minho standing up immediately from his spot in the stands. He had arrived a few minutes ago, waiting for practice to conclude. Jeongin was kneeling down by the side of the bench, tugging at the grass. Jisung instantly jogged over to him when he saw a few tears hitting the ground below him.
“Jeongin, what’s wrong?” He bent down to his level, but Jeongin just hid his face. He could see his hands pulling even harder at the weeds under his feet. The young boy shook his head, and Jisung frowned.
“Today’s practice was hard, wasn’t it? I pushed a few of you to try some new things you weren’t familiar with, so don’t feel bad if things didn’t go the way you wanted them to.” He tried again, but he still wasn’t looking at him, his fingers becoming dirty as he scratched at the soil.
“Defense is hard. But you did well when you were playing midfield, so you won’t have to play that position you were in today ever again if you don’t want to,” he assured him, and that made his head lift slightly. His eyes were red and a little puffy.
“I’m not good,” he mumbled, and that made Jisung's heart crack in his chest.
“That’s not true. We just need to practice a little more.” He smiled at him, and Jeongin shook his head again. He was clearly feeling defeated from today’s practice, and Jisung couldn’t help but feel like it was his fault. It was hard to devote time to some players who needed more guidance, even with an assistant coach to help him out. That’s when he had a small idea.
“Look, I promise I’ll help you become a great player. Maybe if your dad is okay with it, I can give you some personal lessons during the week,” he offered, and Jeongin blinked back at him with a little bit of hope this time.
“Really?” He sounded so small, and Jisung was just happy he was talking. He knew it wasn’t easy for him. He could still see the uncertainty in his eyes.
“You bet, but we have to ask your dad first.”
Jisung could hear someone approaching behind him, and Jeongin was lifting his eyes to catch a glance at them. Jeongin immediately jumped to his feet, attaching himself to his father’s hip once again.
“Hey Innie, is everything okay?” He sounded concerned as the child buried his head into him. He let his fingers card through his hair as Jisung stood from his crouched position.
“He had a hard practice today,” he informed him. That made Minho frown and Jisung once again didn’t like that look on his face. “On the bright side though, I think we found what position he likes and doesn’t like, so that’s good.” He tried to lighten the mood, but Jeongin was still lightly tearing up into the bottom of Minho’s shirt. He was dressed in shorts and a light sweater today. He looked rather attractive in regular clothes.
“Jeongin, it’s okay. Sometimes you’ll have hard days, you don’t have to be upset.” He tried to console him as he pulled back from him a bit.
“Can Coach Han come over and teach me?” he asked suddenly. Jisung felt himself blush as Minho blinked back at the child confused.
“I thought…well if it’s okay with you of course, that I could give him a few private lessons,” he suggested, and Minho still looked shocked.
“Do you think it would be beneficial?” Minho asked, and Jisung was nodding his head instantly.
“Yes, of course. It would be easier to teach him one on one. Having nineteen kids at once makes it kind of hard,” he chuckled, and for the first time tonight, he saw a small smile pop onto Jeongin’s face.
“That sounds great then. How much do you charge?” Minho asked, and Jisung waved his hand back and forth.
“Oh, you don’t have to worry about that.”
Honestly, he never gave private lessons before, so he didn’t have a rate or anything. He just wanted to help Jeongin become better. He hated seeing that sad frown on his face. Even though he knew it would be hard to schedule lessons between work, classes, homework, practice and games. But he knew he could do it. Besides, then he would also get to see Minho a few more times a week as well. He knew that thought was completely selfish, but he would be lying if he said that he wasn’t excited about it.
“Are you sure? I can’t just not pay you.” Minho was holding onto Jeongin’s shoulders then as the boy looked at him with those hopeful eyes. It almost made him feel an intense amount of pressure to help him. He never felt this way with one of his players before. But for some reason, he couldn’t help but want to make him improve. He wanted Jeongin to fall in love with the sport, just like he had all those years ago.
“It’s no problem, really. I just have to review my schedule and then we can do an hour for two nights a week. How does that sound?” He directed that towards Jeongin, and the boy was nodding with a little bit of excitement. Jisung didn’t miss the relieved look on Minho’s face at that.
“Han, I really appreciate this.” Minho said then, and Jisung shook his head, assuring him that it was his pleasure.
“Do you want to go out tonight?” Hyunjin asked then, as he was sprawled out over the couch.
Jisung was currently trying to finish his homework and was organizing his calendar so he knew when and where he had to be. He wasn’t going to lie that he barely had any time to himself. If he wasn’t at school then he was at work. If he wasn’t doing either of those things, then he was at practice. Then, whenever he could, he would fit in his homework. It was kind of exhausting, but it had kept him busy, and away from the bars.
“I can’t, I have to study for a test tonight. I’m busy tomorrow too before you ask,” he informed him and Hyunjin just groaned.
“But Hannie, it’s been weeks since we’ve gone out,” he complained, and Jisung just sighed.
“Ask Felix to go with you.” And that must have been the wrong thing to suggest because Hyunjin made an annoyed, irritated sound.
“He’s been hanging out with Chan all fucking week. He’s barely even texted me back,” he grumbled and that made Jisung roll his eyes.
Chan was one of Felix’s friends from high school. He was in town for a few weeks, and Hyunjin wasn’t a huge fan of his. Only because he thought Chan had a thing for Felix, even though Hyunjin wouldn’t admit that. Because Chan was genuinely one of the nicest people Jisung had ever met. He also had been nothing but nice to Hyunjin, but he hated the way he would steal Felix’s attention whenever he was in town. Hyunjin was kind of a huge child about it.
“Why don’t you ask them both to go out with you then?”
“And have them ignore me all night as they hang all over each other? No thanks.”
“Hyunjin, you know they wouldn’t do that.” He gave him a disappointed look. Hyunjin just huffed, his hair blowing out of his eyes as he did so.
“Whatever, you know I don’t like the guy.”
“You can just say you’re jealous,” Jisung teased then, and that made Hyunjin glare at him.
“What are you talking about?” He sat up then, and Jisung sighed. Usually, Felix was the one he would talk to about this. Hyunjin didn’t understand his feelings, so talking to him was pointless and painful. He loved Felix. Everyone could see it. Well, everyone besides him and Felix.
“Nothing, just forget I said anything.”
It was quiet for a few minutes, and Jisung was hoping that Hyunjin was contemplating what he had just said in his brain, but he gave up on that quickly when he changed the topic.
“Well, why are you busy tomorrow?”
“I’m giving private lessons to one of my U9 soccer club kids,” he told him, and Hyunjin gave him a confused glance.
“I didn’t know you gave private lessons.”
“I don’t usually, but I told the kid I’d help.” He shrugged as he finally submitted his homework questions for the night.
“How kind of you.” He reached over to pinch Jisung's cheek but before he could make it hurt he slapped his hand away.
“I guess, but I may or may not have been more than willing to help because his dad is totally hot,” Jisung told him, and that piqued Hyunjin’s interest, making him chuckle.
“Oh wow, I didn’t know you were into the daddy type,” Hyunjin teased then, and that for some reason made Jisung blush deeply.
“I—I’m not, well usually.” He shrugged, because he was right, that was totally outside of Jisung's normal dating and hookup circle. He had never been interested in someone who had a kid before.
“How old is the kid?” Hyunjin asked then.
“He’s seven.”
“And how old is his dad?” He kept questioning, and Jisung bit his lip.
“I mean…I don’t know, I didn't ask him how old he was. If he had him young then he’d probably be around my age, but I think he’s older than me,” he told him and Hyunjin was smirking at him.
“Are you going to try and make a move on him? Holy shit, are you going to his house for these lessons?” Hyunjin looked way too excited about this, and that made Jisung roll his eyes.
“No we’re meeting at the soccer fields, and of course not. I just said he was hot. Besides, he probably has a wife so it doesn’t really matter.”
“That’s lame,” Hyunjin groaned out, and Jisung knew he was suddenly losing interest. He knew Hyunjin had been wanting him to find a nice guy as well. He knew he wasn’t very good at finding a decent guy to date, so Hyunjin was always trying to get him to tell him about the people he was seeing. After his last few boyfriends, he knew he couldn’t blame him for being a little bit protective.
“You’re not talking to that piece of shit still are you?” he questioned suddenly, and Jisung couldn’t help but flush.
Jisung shook his head. He was ignoring his phone calls now and only answering his texts occasionally. He hadn’t answered him since classes had started, and they hadn’t slept together in months.
“No, I told you we broke up. I’m done with him.”
“Good. You know I hate that guy and he doesn’t deserve you,” he told him, and Jisung just smiled.
Like Felix and Seungmin, he had met Hyunjin his freshman year of college. They all decided to get an apartment off campus together, splitting the rent. They had all became the best of friends, really looking out for one another.
“Well since you’re too busy for me, I guess I’ll have to ask Felix if he and Chan want to go with me then.”
“Ask Seungmin too, I’m sure he’ll be in,” Jisung smiled as Hyunjin groaned.
“Seungmin’s busy too. I swear you both hate me,” he complained, and Jisung just laughed as Hyunjin began texting away on his phone.
It might have been a little late for practice, especially for a seven year old, but it was a Saturday and the only time Jisung could make it work. He smiled as Minho and Jeongin hopped out of the car. It was nice since the fields were mostly empty. Just a few older kids practiced on the pitch next to them.
He waved them over as he was taking a few cones out and placing them on the ground. It wasn’t often Jeongin had a smile on his face, but he did tonight. He couldn’t help but notice him running over to him with a soccer ball in his hands.
“Coach Han, look, my dad got me this new ball. I saw it at the store and he said I could get it.” He showed him, and Jisung's heart couldn’t help but swell at how cute he was.
“Wow, that ball is really cool! The blue matches our team uniforms.” He pointed out and Jeongin nodded excitedly.
“It does!” he agreed, and Jisung just smiled widely at him.
“Why don’t you go take a quick lap around the field to get warmed up?”
“Okay!” He seemed more energetic than he had ever seen him. Jisung was starting to think that maybe the other kids at practice were making him nervous. He knew some kids were just introverted. Hell, even he was, even if he didn’t act like it. It was a struggle to get to where he was today, but he learned how to manage it.
Minho was walking up to him then, his eyes just as shocked as the first day he had met him.
“It’s incredible.” Minho breathed out, and Jisung looked at him with wonder.
“What is?” he asked as Minho placed his hands in his pockets.
“He’s so comfortable around you. It…gives me hope that one day he can talk to everyone like that,” he smiled as he watched Jeongin jogging around the pitch, and Jisung couldn’t help but glance over to see his fond gaze. He could see the pain behind his eyes, but the love was stronger.
“Is he really that shy with others?” he asked surprised, and Minho sighed.
“He always was since he was really little, but with his mom gone, he completely changed,” he told him, and that made Jisung's heart drop to his stomach. He looked down to see his left hand, a gold wedding band wrapped around his finger.
“Oh my, I—I’m so sorry. I had no idea,” he apologized, and Minho quickly shook his head.
“It’s alright. I thought he was too young to really understand, but I guess I was wrong.” He could see that frown returning. Jisung felt the urge to reach out and touch him, but he held back, his hands clenching into fists.
“Sometimes, I’m not sure if I’m doing anything right. I thought maybe putting him in this sport might have been the wrong decision, but…I think that you being his coach has been really helping.” Minho leaned his head over to him, his eyes connecting with his.
Jisung felt his heart stutter in his chest. He blushed a little bit, and he had to look away. His eyes were so intense that he couldn’t handle looking into them for too long. He could see the strong emotions in them, and Jisung bit his lip.
“I…well, I’m glad, really. He’s a nice kid.” Jisung knew he was flustered, because he barely knew what to say. It wasn’t often he would blank on his words, but with him staring at him like that, he couldn’t help it.
“I’m sorry you had to take time out of your schedule to coach him. You’re in college right?” Minho quickly moved their conversation and Jisung was grateful for it.
“Oh really, it’s not a problem. And yes I am. I attend SKZ university.”
“Really? I went there too. But that was years ago now,” he chuckled, and Jisung knew that this might be the only opportunity he had to ask for his age.
“When did you graduate?” he asked carefully, and Minho looked up towards the sky then, as if he was trying to remember.
“Well, I’m thirty-three now, so wow, twelve years ago? Has it been that long already?”
If Jisung had been sipping his water then he would have done a spit take, because he never would have guessed he was in his thirties. He looked so much younger than that.
“What’s that look for?” Minho faked an offended face and Jisung just laughed.
“Nothing! I just…I think you look a lot younger than that.” He couldn’t help but blush again, especially when Minho let out a loud laugh.
“Well, thanks. I definitely don’t feel it. Especially with a seven year old always running around at my feet,” he told him, and Jeongin was then running back towards them, looking a little exhausted.
“C-Coach Han I did it,” he said a little breathless, and Jisung stuck out his hand for a high five.
“Alright, great job. Let’s practice some passes, what do you say?” he suggested and Jeongin nodded.
“Can we use my ball?” he asked hopefully, and Jisung gave him a thumbs up.
“Absolutely.”
Jeongin was definitely better when he didn’t have the pressure of his peers around him. Jisung wasn’t sure how to fix that, but he was determined to think of a way. He knew it wouldn’t be easy to get him to open up to others. It wasn’t something that could be forced either.
Minho had taken his seat on the benches, and Jisung would be lying if he said he wasn’t nervous having his eyes on him. He couldn’t believe that his wife was no longer around. He felt bad thinking about it. It hurt more when he thought of Jeongin’s sweet face. It must have been hard not having his mom around, especially at a young age.
The private lesson had gone well, and Jisung smiled and decided to call it when he saw Jeongin yawning up a storm. He knew it was late.
“I’m sorry, I’ll try and find a better time to practice next week.” Jisung apologized then as they were making their way back to the cars. Jeongin was still small enough that he had to sit in a booster seat, so Minho was strapping him in as Jisung was packing away the sports gear into his own car.
“It’s not a problem, I know it’s tough with a busy schedule, and we really appreciate it. So whatever works for you will work for us,” he assured him, and Jisung was really going to start getting the wrong idea if he kept smiling at him like that. They were close now as Minho had closed the passenger seat door. They were merely inches apart.
“Right. Well, I can text you…if you want to give me your number? Or I can grab it from my player information sheet,” he said, but Minho was grabbing his phone from his hand and punching in his number with a soft grin.
“I’ll see you next week then.” Minho needed to really stop with that flirtatious smile, because Jisung could feel himself falling for it.
And he absolutely, one hundred percent, could not think that way.
“I’ll text you.”
“Hold on, how old is he?” Seungmin questioned then, and Jisung wasn’t sure how the topic arose, but he knew everyone was curious as to why he wasn’t seeing anyone lately. It wasn’t uncommon for Jisung to have loose relationships, with a few guys coming and going from the apartment. But recently he had been too busy, and he hadn’t even had sex in over a month. That’s when he told them that he was interested in a guy, but he was too old for him.
They were all at a restaurant down the street from their apartment. It had been a while since they had all caught up, and Chan was only in town for a few more days until he would be heading back. Jisung couldn’t help but notice how close Seungmin and Chan were sitting together as well, with Chan laughing at everything the younger boy had said. Hyunjin was also turned in so he was as close to Felix as possible, trying to gain his attention at every moment.
Jisung had invited Changbin as well, since he was familiar with his college friends. It had been a few weeks since he had started his private lessons with Jeongin, and Jisung was absolutely obsessed with his dad.
Not only was he incredibly hot, he was super kind. He brought him food whenever they would have lessons, even though Jisung told him that it wasn’t necessary for him to do that. He had heard Jisung's stomach rumble once, asking him if he was eating properly. After that, he would bring him something every time they met. He knew Jisung was busy, so he was always checking to make sure that the practice times had worked for him.
He also was learning a lot more about him, since he would talk with him as Jeongin would do his warm up laps.
“He’s thirty-three,” he told them, and even Felix’s mouth dropped open a little this time. Hyunjin looked absolutely pleased, and Changbin was shaking his head.
“So, you’re telling me he’s twelve years older than you?” Seungmin checked, and Jisung just nodded.
“Wait, wait, wait,” Felix interrupted then, “how did you meet this guy again?”
“His kid plays on our soccer team,” Changbin answered for him, and Felix’s eyes couldn’t get any wider.
“He has a kid?” he asked, perplexed.
“He’s into the daddy type now,” Hyunjin smirked.
Felix cringed and Chan laughed. Jisung groaned in irritation at his unnecessary comment.
“Okay, please do not phrase it like that, and never open your mouth to speak again,” Felix said, placing his hand over Hyunjin’s mouth and making him giggle.
“Guys, I just think he’s hot, nothing is happening.”
“Nothing is happening yet,” Changbin elbowed him with a grin, and Jisung rolled his eyes.
“Nothing is ever going to happen. He’s a widower and there is no way he would ever consider it.” He frowned as he said it, and Changbin shrugged.
“I heard the other parents talking about it. I guess she was sick and passed away when the kid was like three.”
“That’s really fucking sad,” Seungmin said then, and that made Jisung frown even deeper.
“He’s a really nice kid. He’s got a few issues though, and I think if his coach was seeing his dad things might get a little weird and make it worse,” Jisung told them. Jeongin was already sensitive as it was. Flirting with his dad was an absolute yellow card. Fucking him was a definite red.
“He really likes you though. He won’t even talk to me. Actually, I don’t think he’s actually ever even spoken a word to me before, now that I’m thinking about it,” Changbin said, his face twisted up as he tried to recall if Jeongin had spoken to him before. He definitely hadn’t, but Jisung wasn’t going to stop him from trying to remember, because at least that would shut him up for a minute.
“There’s no way you could take care of a kid anyway,” Hyunjin said, and Jisung scowled at him.
“Why not?” he asked, a little offended, and Hyunjin threw his hands up in defense.
“You’re way too busy for that shit. You’re running around all the time. You don’t even have time for us.” Hyunjin shrugged, and Jisung couldn’t argue that it wasn’t true. He was always busy, and even now he knew he should be studying, but making time for friends was important too.
“Hannie is really good with kids though. I think he’d be a good dad,” Changbin offered, and that made Jisung smile.
“Thanks Bin.”
“So, are you going to try and get with this guy or what?” Seungmin asked then, and Jisung just sighed.
“No. I don’t think it would be appropriate. Even if he is super hot.”
“Why not?” Hyunjin asked then, and Jisung shrugged.
“Well, one, like I said, he’s so much older than me so there’s no way he would consider it, he probably sees me as a kid, and two I just think that it wouldn’t be a good idea to fuck one of my players dads. Might make it a little awkward,” he told him, stirring his straw in his water.
“Age is just a number, though. Who cares if he’s older than you?” Chan said, taking a sip of his drink.
“He’s right. Love is love,” Changbin added.
“Aren’t you curious what he’s like in bed? I know you are,” Hyunjin waggled his eyebrows at him, and Felix was once again slapping his hand over his mouth. Even though Hyunjin wasn’t wrong.
“You really have no filter do you?” he complained. Hyunjin just winked at him, and Jisung could see Felix blushing slightly.
“It’s a bad idea.” Jisung shook his head. He had determined that he would only admire him from afar. He could handle that. He could let his mind fill in the blanks.
“I think you should go for it,” Changbin told him, and Jisung laughed.
“I can’t,” he denied, and Felix sighed.
“Hannie, if you like him, and he’s a good guy, then why not?”
Jisung bit his lip. Because he was probably the nicest guy he had ever met in his life. He was kind and considerate, and Jisung wanted to know more about him. His smile was addicting, and his eyes were gorgeous. He had the prettiest face, and he wanted to kiss those lips. He wanted to feel those hands on his body. He wanted to know if behind that soft and gentle gaze, there was a strong man willing to hold him down and make him cry for it.
He immediately snapped out of it as the food was being placed on the table and everyone was digging in.
Jisung wasn’t happy that they lost their first game. He was good at hiding it though. But he wanted to make sure that his players knew that they had to bring their all next time. Losing was okay if they tried their best, but Jisung knew they could do better.
He knew that Jeongin was still a giant hole on the field, even if he had improved a little bit. He wouldn’t even look Jisung in the eye as he was giving them his spiel. He knew he felt like he had disappointed him. He could see it on his face.
After most of the parents had picked up their kids, he could see Jeongin waiting for Minho in his usual spot on the bench.
“Hey,” Jisung tried to grab his attention, but Jeongin could barely look in his direction, “I’m not upset with you, you know that, right?”
He could see Minho waiting near them, and he could probably hear their conversation.
“I—I’m still not good. Even after you helped me.” Jeongin’s fat tears were sliding down his cheeks and wetting his jersey.
“But think about how far you’ve come since you started. You’ve changed a lot since then.” Jisung rubbed his back trying to encourage him, and he meant his words. He knew Jeongin had learned a lot since day one, and by teaching him one on one, it had helped him improve a lot.
“Coach Han, you’re still going to help me, right? I promise I’ll do better next time,” he cried, and Jisung felt his chest tighten. He placed his clipboard down, and he couldn’t help but wrap him in a hug.
“Yeah, of course I’m still going to help you. You did a good job tonight, but I know next time you’ll do even better.” He held him, and he could feel the boy crying into his chest. He knew Jeongin was a little more sensitive than his other kids. He knew that he felt insecure and anxious whenever he was around others or on the field. And he wanted to help ease that feeling.
Jisung pulled back then, and wiped the tears from his eyes.
“Don’t be sad. C’mon, your dad’s waiting for you.” He could feel Minho’s eyes on him. But this time there was an expression on his face that he couldn’t read. Jeongin jumped up and ran over to him, grabbing his hand and pressing himself to his side.
“Everything okay?” Minho asked Jisung then, and Jisung puffed out a breath and placed his hands on his hips.
“I was just telling Jeongin that we’ll win next time because we’re going to practice even harder, right?” he asked the young boy, and he just nodded his head into Minho’s side.
“C-Coach Han said he’s going to keep helping me,” he whimpered into his body, and Minho chuckled and tousled his hair.
“Coach Han is a really great guy, isn’t he?” Minho asked his son then, but his eyes were connected with his, and Jisung knew he could see him blush.
“Yeah. I like Coach Han.” Jeongin pulled back to look at him as well.
“Me too.” Minho smiled at him, and Jisung felt his heart get stuck in his throat as his eyes never left his face. He had absolutely no idea what to say. His voice was trapped inside him. He couldn’t form any words.
“We’ll see you on Monday for practice?” Minho said then, as he grabbed Jeongin’s hand and pulled him towards the car.
“Um, yeah, Monday.” He was flustered, and he knew Minho could tell.
“See you then.” He waved after him, and his heart was still racing in his chest. He couldn’t bring himself to tear his eyes away until their car disappeared into the distance.
Jisung knew he was definitely reading it wrong. There was no way Minho was interested in him. But he couldn’t stop thinking about what he had said last week. Those fond eyes devoured him as he had said he liked him.
“Hello? Earth to Jisung?” Changbin was trying to get his attention, but he was staring into space.
“Sorry, what’s up?”
“What’s got you all distracted?” he questioned, and Jisung bit his lip. They were trying to set up cones for the practice drills, and Changbin had been trying to ask him where he wanted them.
He was unreasonably nervous for Minho to show up with Jeongin tonight. After last week, he couldn’t stop thinking about him. His sweet voice rang over and over in his head, like a song on repeat.
“Me too.”
He knew he was reading into it way too hard. He had just helped his son get better at soccer. It was nothing more than him being grateful.
He panicked when he saw Minho pull up in his car. For some reason, his confidence was slipping around him. He wasn’t sure if it was because he was a lot older than him, or if it was because he was so attractive, but it was messing with his head.
Jeongin jumped out of the car first, and ran over to Jisung.
“My dad said to give you this.” He held out his hands, one of Jisung's favorite energy drinks in his little palm.
“Well, thank you. I really appreciate it,” he smiled at him as he could see Minho grabbing his bag and Jeongin’s ball from the car.
“Hey, why don’t you go practice passing with your teammates?” he suggested, and Jeongin bit his lip, but nodded in agreement, not wanting to disappoint him.
He had been getting along with the others a little better these days. He seemed a little less shy, but he still didn’t talk with them. But he told his older veteraned players to make the younger newer players feel comfortable and included, and no one liked to let Coach Han down.
Minho was approaching him, and he knew he had to get his heartbeat under control.
“Hi Han,” he greeted, and Jisung lifted the energy drink in his hands. He had mentioned once that he drank them to get through particularly tough days. Minho clearly remembered.
“Thanks for this.”
Minho smiled fondly.
“Of course. I thought you might need it.”
Jisung felt his insides burn as his eyes crinkled with his perfect smile. He was totally obsessed.
“I know you said tomorrow afternoon would work, but I have a meeting at the office that I can’t miss.” Minho frowned then, and Jisung was quickly pulling out his phone to check his calendar.
“Oh, okay, no problem. I have class until six, but I know the fields are being used for games at that time,” he told him, trying to find a different time to practice.
“If you want, you can come to my house. I bought Jeongin a net and our backyard is big enough to practice in,” he offered, and Jisung felt his nerves spike.
He was inviting him over. To his house. With that damn smile on that pretty face.
He had to remind himself that this was for Jeongin. And for no other reason.
“Yeah that would work. I could be there by seven.”
That made Minho smile extra wide.
“Awesome. I’m sure Jeongin will be thrilled.”
And Jisung couldn’t be sure, but he thought he sounded excited.
He couldn’t focus in class. Honestly, he should have just skipped. He couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that he would be at Minho’s house in just a little over two hours. He knew he was just going there to give Jeongin a lesson, but he couldn’t stop his nerves from racing.
After class finally let out, he made his way home so he could change into some athletic shorts and a t-shirt. Before he could make a clean getaway, Felix and Hyunjin noticed him from the couch.
“Where are you headed?” Hyunjin asked, tipping his head over the back of the couch.
“I have private lessons today,” he told him, stuffing his jacket in his bag since it was warm enough that he didn’t need it.
“I thought the fields were booked on Tuesday’s?” And of course Felix knew and had to ask that.
“Um, I’m going to their house actually.” He blushed as he said it, and it was likely because Hyunjin was looking at him like he was about to run a victory lap around the room.
“Holy shit,” he began to say but Jisung shook his head multiple times, throwing his bag over his shoulder.
“No, it’s not like that. Really, it’s not,” he told him, and Hyunjin rolled his eyes.
“Felix, should we bet on this? Because I know you don’t think he’ll end up fucking him but I totally do and I need to make some money,” he joked, and Jisung gave him an annoyed glare.
“Stop it.” Felix couldn’t help but laugh, shooting Jisung an apologetic smile.
“You guys, I already told you it’s not going to happen.” Jisung knew that Minho wasn’t going to be interested in some college kid. Hell, he probably wasn’t even ready to see someone else, or he could already have a girlfriend that he didn’t know about. He wouldn’t be shocked. He was extremely attractive, and no man who was that attractive was single for long.
“Whatever you say.” Hyunjin threw his arm around Felix then, immersing themselves back into the movie they were watching.
For some reason, that conversation made Jisung even more nervous as he drove over to their house. And it was a nice house. He still had no idea what he had done for a living, but he must have made a decent amount of money to afford this place. He could see the backyard was lit up with lights, and he wasn’t sure if he should just head back there or knock on the front door.
He decided that going to the front door first was his safer option. He rang the doorbell, and before he could even take a breath it was swinging open, Jeongin smiling up wide at him.
“Coach Han is here dad!” he screamed into the house.
Jeongin welcomed him inside, and he was just as mesmerized by the inside as he was the outside. Jisung immediately took off his shoes as he stepped inside, seeing that the white carpet would not appreciate the dirt.
He noticed Minho rounding the corner, wiping his hands on a dish towel.
“Hey, how was your class?” he asked, and this suddenly felt so domestic, that it was borderline uncomfortable. He had Jeongin grabbing at his hand, and Minho smiling sweetly at him, welcoming him home and asking how his day was.
“I—It was good. Ended a little earlier than I thought so I came right over, I hope that’s okay.” He had texted him that he was on his way, but he hadn’t responded.
“Right, I just saw your text. I was making dinner. If you haven’t eaten yet, you’re more than welcome to join us,” he offered, and Jisung shook his head. He hadn't eaten. He forgot to eat his meals sometimes, especially after his late night classes, but there was no way he could just come into their house and start eating their food.
“Oh, I couldn’t intrude like that-”
“It’s no problem. I always make too much anyway, and Jeongin doesn’t really like leftovers.”
“Leftovers are gross.” The boy chimed in, pulling Jisung by his hand into the kitchen.
Jisung couldn’t help but feel a little awkward. He tried to offer to help Minho set the table. He tried to offer to help make Jeongin’s plate. He tried to help do anything, but Minho refused to accept. Jisung had noticed that his smile never left his face as he placed the food down for everyone to dig into. It was just chicken, rice and some kind of mixed vegetable but it was healthy and looked delicious after not eating all day.
“Thank you, I really appreciate this,” Jisung said then, waiting for Minho to begin before he did.
It was so tasty that he couldn’t stop himself from going for a little more.
“So Han, you also work a part time job right?” Minho asked, and Jisung nodded his head, swallowing his food before answering.
“Yeah, it’s just at this local music store. They sell records, CD’s, vinyl, stuff like that. It’s not bad and it helps pay for school,” he told him, and since he had asked about his job he decided now would be the best time to ask about his.
“What do you do?”
“I’m an accountant, specializing in auditing, specifically municipalities,” he told him, and Jisung really had no idea what he had even just said, or what that job even entailed.
“Oh, nice.” He tried to sound interested, but Minho just laughed.
“It pays well, even if it sounds boring,” he laughed, and Jisung chuckled a bit himself, “What are you majoring in at college? This is your final year right?”
“Yeah, I’m getting my degree in music production. I’m pretty passionate about music, I’m hoping to work at a big production company some day,” he told him, and Minho nodded, seeming genuinely impressed, and suddenly Jisung felt embarrassed.
Looking at him now, he really did seem and look so much older than him. He was a well off man, with a stable job, a beautiful home, and a seven year old. Jisung was still living with his roommates, with a job that paid him shit money, an apartment that was never cleaned that he could barely afford a fourth of, and he was completely uncertain about his future.
They were in two totally different spots, and Jisung had never felt like such a kid in his entire life.
They finished eating, and Jisung knew it was time to get to practicing. He wanted Jeongin to learn how to dribble the ball better while running. He had been struggling with it, especially when the defense was coming at him full speed.
They went out to the backyard to practice, and Jisung could see Minho watching them from the kitchen window. He tried not to let it affect him, but he couldn’t help the race of his heart like always. Minho seemed to always be watching him. He thought maybe it was because he was worried about Jeongin, but he couldn’t be sure.
He knew that Jeongin was getting frustrated as Jisung had stolen the ball out from underneath him for the tenth time. He tried to give him tips, but he kept losing the battle.
“Try and stand a little taller. If you let the other guy push you down, then they will,” Jisung told him, and Jeongin nodded.
Jisung came after him again, and he could see Jeongin standing his ground. Jeongin was able to dodge him for the first time, getting behind him and scoring a goal.
“There you go!” he yelled with excitement, seeing Jeongin’s happy smiling face. Jeongin was running over to him, giving him a high five. He had never seen him so happy playing soccer before tonight. The sight filled Jisung with warmth, finally feeling a little accomplished.
They practiced for a little longer than they intended, but Jisung was having a great time teaching him. Jeongin seemed to be a little more receptive to his training methods today, and every time he scored a goal, he looked insanely happy. Jisung knew it was time to call it when it was almost nine, and Jeongin was starting to yawn.
“Alright, you did a really great job tonight, but I think it’s almost my bedtime so I’ll have to get going,” Jisung said, and Jeongin frowned at that news.
“Can’t you stay just a little longer?” he begged, and that made Jisung's heart throb.
“Coach Han has to get home buddy. He has a lot of things to do tomorrow,” Minho said then, opening the patio door and coming out into the backyard. Jisung looked over to see him carrying a to-go container, and Jisung smiled with a soft blush.
“Okay,” he pouted, and that made Jisung laugh. He bent down on one knee so they were level again.
“I’ll be back on Thursday, how does that sound?” he told him and Jeongin nodded with a gentle smile. Minho ushered the boy into the house then, telling him to go get his shower ready. Jeongin ran inside with a small wave, and Jisung couldn’t help but think he was the cutest kid on this earth.
“Here,” Minho handed him a tiny container filled with food.
“Thank you so much really. You just fed me for two days,” he laughed, and he swore he saw Minho blush slightly.
“Han, I…I really don’t know how to thank you enough. I haven’t seen him this happy in a long time,” Minho was looking at him with that expression that he couldn’t read again. Jisung felt his breath hitch, especially as Minho stepped a little closer.
“I—I didn’t really do much. Teaching him is my pleasure, he’s a really great kid,” he assured him, and Minho shook his head.
“You’re kind, sweet and patient with him. I’m really glad that we met you. I’m happy I decided to sign him up for this team,” he told him, and Jisung couldn’t help but remember the uncertainty in Minho’s eyes after Jeongin’s first practice. It definitely had changed.
“I’m…happy too. That you signed him up. He’s made me remember why I love this sport so much. Seeing him excited to play makes me happy,” he admitted. He was definitely blushing deeper now and Minho could obviously see it.
“He really looks up to you,” Minho told him, and Jisung realized that they were standing very close, “I love seeing you two together.”
That made his heart burst inside his chest. Jisung couldn’t help but let his eyes linger down to his mouth. His mouth was slightly parted, and Jisung was thinking that it would be so easy to just lean in and kiss him. He knew he was staring, he couldn’t stop. And he wanted this. Even though he knew he shouldn’t. Even if he wasn’t sure that Minho was feeling the same way. Even if he was way older than him. Even if they were in completely different worlds. He didn’t care anymore.
“I…I know. I see you watching us.” His voice was low, and Minho definitely wasn’t expecting him to say that, but it was true. Every single time they had practice, those eyes were on him. He could feel them on his neck. That fond gaze. Minho just chuckled.
“You kids are too cute, I can’t help it,” he admitted, and Jisung bit his tongue as Minho backed away.
Kids.
Right.
He could feel the air returning to his lungs as his face was becoming more distant. Jisung wanted so desperately to pull him back, but he was once again reading too much into it. Minho was just thankful that Jeongin had opened up a little more. That Jisung was taking the time out of his day to teach his son how to become a better soccer player. And that was it, because Jisung was standing there like a fool, ready to kiss a man who clearly didn’t see him the way Jisung saw him.
“If you’d like, we can have his lessons here from now on. I know it might be a little farther away, but—”
“Yeah, we can do that,” Jisung interrupted, feeling like he needed to get out of there now. He was definitely bright red, because he really thought that Minho was going to kiss him. He was embarrassed, because how could he misread that?
He grabbed his bag then and threw it over his shoulder, waving goodbye before he could jump into his car and sigh out a huge breath of humiliation.
God he was such an idiot. A totally smitten idiot.