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This year is the year I will finally do it, Anthea swears to herself. I am going to come clean and work up the courage to tell him how I feel.
As if sensing him, she turns around and sure enough, he’s there. She throws a glance, he catches it, and every time this happens, she’s further convinced that maybe all they are aren’t just best of friends.
They spent the summer apart, him going back to his mother’s hometown to get back in touch with a part of him. He crosses the room with a smile, one that was so devastatingly handsome.
“Oh Anthea, I have so much to tell you.” Ares says.
And he tells her. The adventures he went on, the people he met, specifically a girl who managed to capture his heart. He tells her the tales of their afternoons lounging by the shore, the dreams they have of the future– one where they’re together.
Of course, he’s no psychic. He wouldn’t know how she truly felt without her actually saying them, can he? She loves him. So painfully much, unfortunately. She didn't miss the way his face lit up when he was recounting the months he had spent with Callie. It was always like this. Him talking, her listening– cherishing every word he says, and locking them in her heart. It was that fear of hers. She didn’t know why but she had always clung onto his words because of the fear that those are all that would be left of him for her to have. She didn’t have his heart. All she had previously thought had turned out to be nothing but foolish dreams and hopes.
She wants to hate Callie. Hate the girl who had taken the heart of Ares. Her Ares. But he was never hers in the first place. She can’t bring herself to hate her. To pray for her downfall or misfortune because if she was anything, she was selfless. Driving Callie away from Ares would push him into her arms but she can’t do it. Not at the expense of someone else. Because hurting Callie would hurt Ares and Anthea loves him too much to ever harm him. It would be harming herself. She’d so desperately catch any of his misery for as long as he’s alright.
What would Anthea do for the one she loved? Nothing. She wouldn’t do anything. No schemes of breaking them up or any ill-intentions. She will not do anything to get him back. It takes everything in her to hold herself back.
But Ares is happy and that is all that matters. She will be selfless one more time. She won’t do everything and anything in her power to get rid of Callie. She won’t do anything, in fact.
She has resigned herself to the fact that she may never love again. For her, it’s either Ares or no one. Just because she lost the one she loves doesn’t mean he has to lose his too for the reason that it isn’t her.
Losing Callie? That would devastate him. Destroy him, even. And since this boy is still her best friend (and the guy she loves), she won’t object. That would hurt him and she would never be able to inflict such pain on him.
Sometimes, the most painful thing when loving someone is not doing anything. Not doing anything to get him to love you back. Not doing anything to get him to leave the one he actually loves. Not doing anything to jeopardize the love and happiness he has found in the presence of someone else. Not doing anything for yourself to get the life you’ve dreamed of with the guy of your dreams because you aren’t that person for him, and because you love him too much to ever put your wants before his.
So she backs off, and she accepts it.
What does Anthea do for the one she loves? She does nothing.