Chapter Text
“Hey, Merlin! Buddy!” Gwaine said, clapping Merlin on the shoulder and nearly causing him to spill the drink in his hand.
Merlin set his drink down on the table as Gwaine stepped up beside him, looking much happier to see Merlin than he had any right to. Giving Gwaine a wide smile, Merlin said firmly, "No."
Gwaine’s smile faltered. “But you haven’t even heard what I was going to say!” Gwaine protested.
“Because I already know I’m not going to like whatever it is you are about to ask me to do.”
Gwaine leaned closer, setting his own glass down beside Merlin’s with a solid thunk and the ice clinked against the glass. “Just hear me out,” Gwaine said. When Merlin opened his mouth to tell his friend no again, Gwaine clasped his hands together. “Please!” he said, drawing out the word in a high whine.
Merlin closed his eyes and exhaled slowly.
When he opened them again, Gwaine was already beaming. “Great! Now-”
“I didn’t say I was considering hearing you out.”
“Ah, but I know what that expression of yours means,” Gwaine said, pointing and drawing a large circle in the air that outlined Merlin’s face. Gwaine pulled out the chair beside Merlin, scraping the legs of the chair against the wooden floor before sinking into the seat and leaning in closer so he could lower his voice. “You see, I got the perfect gig set up for next week.”
“Okay? Good for you?” Merlin said, not understanding why this was something he needed to hear.
“But I have run into a bit of a problem.”
Merlin raised his cup and took two deep swallows, anchoring himself for whatever Gwaine was going to say to make this Merlin’s problem. “What is that?”
“My mum just got scheduled for surgery.”
“For what?” Merlin asked, suddenly concerned.
“She broke her leg but didn’t tell me right away. The surgery needs to be done ASAP, but it’s supposed to be pretty safe so I’m not worried about that. The problem is, she’s going to need someone to look after her when they discharge her.”
“And you want me to go take care of your mum?” Merlin asked, unimpressed. He’d never even met Gwaine’s mother, which would make this a very uncomfortable favor.
“No.” Gwaine pushed his drink over to Merlin with a sheepish grin. “I’m asking you to take the gig.”
Merlin barked out a laugh and pushed Gwaine's drink back. “Hell no.”
“Come on!”
“No. You’ll just have to cancel it.”
“I can’t," Gwaine said, suddenly serious. "Not this one.”
“Why not?” Merlin asked.
“For one, the money is too good to pass up!” Merlin rolled his eyes but Gwaine pressed on. "But what makes this really important is that he’s worried his dad will flip about him being gay so he wants to test the waters before bringing anyone real.”
There’s the problem. The reason this person was desperate enough to hire someone to bring home. “So you are trying to throw me to the sharks? His dad will end up being some homophobic prick and I’ll be expected to sit around and take it.”
“We don’t know that for sure.”
"But he's worried enough about the possibility to not want to put his real boyfriend through it."
"He doesn't actually have a real boyfriend just yet, but-"
“I said no, Gwaine.”
“Please! You can have all the money, I swear! But my reputation and my conscience requires that I don’t cancel. This is Arthur fucking Pendragon!”
Merlin didn’t know why Gwaine thought that name meant anything to him. “Gwaine, I really don’t–”
“It’s one week in a bloody castle for Christmas! Everything paid for by Pendragon himself!”
“An entire week? I can’t just–”
“It’s for five grand, Merlin!”
That made Merlin pause. “Five grand? As in-”
“Yes. Five thousand.” Merlin thought it sounded too good to be true and Gwaine must have read his skepticism because he added, “And he already delivered half up front.”
“Wow. But why is he paying so much?”
Gwaine looked a little guilty as he answered, “He’s a Pendragon. Old money. I knew he’d be able to pay if it was important to him, and he did. The money's yours if you just say yes! I’ll forward the advance to your account tonight!”
Five thousand would allow him to breathe for a few months without fretting about his hours at Gaius’s shop, which was already going to be closed for the week of Christmas. It wouldn't be a conflict and it would mean extra money. A lot of extra money.
Merlin squeezed his eyes shut. “I’m totally going to regret this, aren’t I?”
“Here, I’ll show you a picture if you need more incentive. Just look at him!” Gwaine held out his phone so Merlin could see the image. “How can you say no to that?”
Merlin stared at the picture of the blond, hair sweaty from playing footie. Nice figure, a crooked smile as he slapped the back of someone just out of frame, the man's eyes crinkling with mirth. The man actually looked a bit familiar, though Merlin couldn't place him.
“You get to spend an entire week cozying up to him.”
It was tempting, but also promised to be a week of potential torture. Then he recognized the uniform. “Wait. This is your team’s uniform. He’s on your football team?” Merlin tore his eyes from the screen.
“Yes.”
“A friend of yours then?”
Gwaine shrugged. “Not really. He doesn’t spend much time with the team outside of practice and games. Maybe showed up to the pub after a game a couple of times. He’s not a bad guy, just quiet.”
“He'll know I’m not you as soon as I show up.”
“I’ll explain everything to him so he’ll know.”
“What if hiring you was just an excuse for him to get you alone? He’ll be disappointed to get me.” Having to trade someone confident and athletic for someone shy and scrawny.
“I swear he won’t. Arthur will understand. He just needs someone to bring home. You’ll do great.”
Merlin glanced back down at the image on the screen and bit his lip.
“I knew you’d say yes.”
“I didn’t.”
“But you will.”
Merlin sighed. Gwaine did know him too well.
-
“I can’t believe he’s doing this to me.” Arthur swore, staring at his phone after the last text with Gwaine.
“Hey, he at least provided a last minute replacement,” Morgana said. “And you never did tell Father your date’s name because you didn’t want him to know it was a man. So it’ll be fine.”
“But Merlin?” Arthur asked, looking at the text. “That’s a bird. Or a wizard. What if he’s – I don’t know – one of those LARPers or something? Shows up in a wizard cloak or something equally ridiculous?”
Morgana just rolled her eyes and stirred her coffee. “Gwaine swore it was all legit and that Merlin would treat it professionally, just as you asked.” She put the spoon in her mouth to clean it off.
“What if Merlin's, I don't know, hideous?”
She wagged her spoon at him. “Gwaine said he's cute.”
“Then what if he's an idiot?” Something had to be wrong with a person who was willing to give up their Christmas to do something insane like this with a complete stranger. At least he’d known Gwaine. He'd already known Gwaine was impulsive. He didn't know anything about this Merlin person.
“Gwaine wouldn't recommend someone who couldn’t do the job. They’re flatmates, right? So this Merlin probably won’t be entirely crazy or a murderer,” she said simply.
“But I don’t know Merlin. I know Gwaine. It’ll be awkward pretending to be boyfriends because I know nothing about this man.”
“Then get to know him on the drive out. Pick him up and, I don’t know, talk to him!”
Arthur groaned. “An hour trapped in a car with a complete stranger. It’ll be terrible.”
“But it would have been fine with Gwaine?”
“I mean, at least then we could always talk footie. What do I talk to this guy about?”
“About your family. His. Your jobs. Treat it like you would a date and get to know him.”
Arthur groaned. “This is more work than I wanted.”
“Then get a real date and cancel.”
“We leave this weekend! What kind of person am I going to pick up in a day that I can trust won’t be an insane person?”
“Just call Merlin. Talk to him for ten minutes. If it’s terrible, then cancel. But don’t you dare try to take your deposit back. They are bending over backwards to make sure you still have someone. It's not their fault you are having second thoughts.”
“Fine. I’ll give him ten minutes.”
-
Merlin looked at his phone as it buzzed.
Unknown Number - Cafe Noir. 9:15
“What is this?” Merlin asked, staring at the text.
Gwaine looked over his shoulder and prodded the screen. “That’s Arthur’s number,” he said, walking into the kitchen to pull his toast from the toaster.
“But what is it?”
“A text,” Gwaine said, spreading butter onto his toast.
Merlin threw a crumpled napkin at his friend, who laughed as he attempted and failed to dodge the projectile.
“Alright! It looks like he wants to meet you,” Gwaine said, jabbing towards Merlin with his toast before taking a bite out of it, dropping crumbs all over their kitchen counter.
“In thirty minutes? Not even asking if I’m available? What kind of prat does that?”
“The kind that has always been the boss’s son, in charge, filthy rich, and expects people to jump when he says so.”
Merlin wrinkled his nose as he stared at his phone. “I’m not doing that.”
“He’s paying you to do that,” Gwaine pointed out.
“Hell no.”
-
Arthur took a step inside the café when his phone chirruped.
M- No
Arthur frowned.
A- What do you mean no?
M- I’m busy
A- Get unbusy and get here. I don’t have all day.
M- Neither do I. I am working and then I have a last minute week long trip to prepare for and I am not dropping everything to show up at your beck and call. My services don’t start until tomorrow. So - no
A- Show up now or you won’t have a trip
M- Fine. I’d rather see my mum anyways
A- You can’t just cancel on me!
M- I didn’t. you just fired me
A- What is your problem?
M- I’m not a dog nor am I really your boyfriend. And if this is how you treat your boyfriends, no wonder you had to buy one for the week
A- I’ve always done just fine
M- Then do just fine with someone else.
M - And I don't do refunds for prats
Arthur stared at his phone, furious.
He shoved the café door open as he stormed back out to his car. Once inside and settled behind the wheel, he called his sister.
“What did you think of him?” Morgana asked without preamble.
“He refused to show up.”
“Really? Did he say why?”
“He said he’s busy.”
“After you asked him if he could meet you?” she asked incredulously.
“I… I didn’t actually ask him,” he admitted.
Morgana laughed. “You are so bad at this, Arthur.”
“I’ve done just fine!”
“With gold-digging girlfriends who had nothing better to do than follow your every whim in the hopes that you’d marry them so they could get your money.”
They had all been very accommodating. “That's just how relationships are,” he said stubbornly.
“No, Arthur, they're not. Especially not when someone has a job and life of their own that they won't risk losing by betting their future on a sugar daddy. If you want someone to order around, expect to pay for it one way or another.”
“I am paying him,” Arthur grumbled.
“Just apologize so you can make Uther flip out this week and get it out of the way.”
“You just want to watch it happen.”
“Yes I do. Now apologize to Merlin before he cancels on you or something.”
“Fine,” Arthur grumbled and started texting.