Chapter Text
The city had always been too much for Jungwon.
Loud, with its blinding lights and bustling energy. So when the opportunity to live with his grandparents in the quiet suburbs of Suwon arose after his graduation from university, Jungwon gladly took it, and bade his wishes towards his elder sister and his parents, who, as always, were too busy with work to care. And his sister had worried for him. Jungwon could tell by the way her eyes had flashed, startled when he'd told her he was going to leave for halmeoni's.
Jungwon remembered her faintly; the last memory of their parting being her urgent voice. "If anything happens, come back for me, alright?" And then she had hugged him, whispering words of invisible comfort to him, and sent him onto the train to watch him disappear off into the distance. Worried for him, as they all were. But Jungwon knew better.
From the corner of nobody's eyes, a young man wearing a cat-eared beanie stepped out of the station, dragging a large, sticker-patched suitcase behind him.
There he stood, awkwardly cradling both the handle of his suitcase and the notebook in his busy hand to palm for his phone. Waiting for the cab to arrive, Jungwon found a seat on the rickety bench in front of the station. He sat and stared at the broken watch on his wrist, arrows ticking beneath the jarred cracks of glass. The time read half past three in the afternoon, but the drive to his grandparents' house would be another long one. Humming, Jungwon stowed his phone away and turned to his notebook.
If Jungwon had been asked who his best friend was, he would have answered with the notebook in his hand. His sole confidant, and his sole voice. Jungwon had suffered from social anxiety for as long as he could remember, but was only diagnosed at the age of eight after his parents were concerned about him not being able to utter a single word in school. Selective mutism was a factor of this, and he would get so nervous in front of strangers that he'd only speak to his sister, and occasionally, to his mother. Never to his father.
The only other way for Jungwon to communicate with others due to his mutism was sign language, which he took up after his art teacher had recommended it to him. Of course, not everyone in the world knew sign language, so he resorted to his trusty notebook, accompanied with a pen to write down what he wanted to say to others so they could understand him. Often Jungwon was asked if he was deaf, and he simply let others assume so he wouldn't cause more misunderstandings.
It was just the way of Jungwon's world, and how it had always been.
An orange car rolled to a gentle stop in front of the station, seemingly in search of a guest. Recognising the plate number, Jungwon hurried from the bench, suitcase and notebook in tow. The driver kindly helped him put the baggage in the trunk and left Jungwon to hover over the address, making sure the handwriting was clear enough before displaying the piece of paper to the driver, who nodded and allowed Jungwon to the back seat.
Once the cab started its drive away from the station, Jungwon leaned back against his seat, easing into the plushness of the chair with a quiet hum as the seatbelt fastened over him with a click. He felt slightly glad that this driver wasn't a man to make small talk, as he had simply uttered a "Good day, sir," and left it at that. It was already hard enough explaining to others about why he couldn't speak in front of people, so whatever silence that came, he latched happily onto it like he was a butterfly who clutched at a fluttering leaf in the breeze, treating it like a rarity.
As his surroundings rolled gently into view, Jungwon couldn't help but quickly feel himself getting whisked into the fantasy of his new home. Suwon was a large city, and densely populated, but the hustle and bustle compared to those of the busy districts in Seoul were much more tame, especially since he was travelling to an area that was closer to the countryside than to another urban maze.
Jungwon drew away from the window with a purse on his lips, remembering that he still had to wait under the long-winded ticking of time before he'd arrive at his destination. Checking the location on his phone, he sighed quietly. One and-a-half hours. Until I see halmeoni again.
His soul was impatient, but as impatient as he was, he could wait. Pulling down his beanie in all modesty, Jungwon found himself fast asleep, cheek slumped against the window, engulfed in a temporary shroud of darkness.
-
Jungwon awoke to the sound of a bird chirping in the husky evening air, and the driver called out a warning before the taxi spluttered to a stop in front of a certain house.
Amidst the rest of the neighbourhood, this house was the only building which possessed a slanting roof, uncommon for modern structures. It didn't seem old and it wasn't about to crumble anytime soon, as the outside had clearly been refurbished from the traditional qualities it used to have. Trinkets like an empty bird's nest and an antique of an oil lamp were hung by the post. There was no sign on the front wall of the house, just bricks, yet the door had a wooden sign that had the words "Sheep Strawberry Garden" in small penmanship on it. Most importantly, the place looked familiar. Nice, and homely.
Jungwon recognised the place with a twinge of longing, and a quiet wave of nostalgia washed over his senses when the door rustled open and an elderly woman in blue hurried out, skin wrinkled from age yet aglow once more when her eyes laid upon the boy standing in front of her.
"Omo, Jungwon-ah! Is that you, my boy? You've grown so much since you've gone!" His grandmother gasped in delight, clasping a frail hand over his trembling ones. "Ah, poor you, standing here all out in the cold," she tutted in worry, turning towards the hapless driver, who had already hauled Jungwon's suitcase from the trunk after he had been paid for his service. "Was the car not warm enough, perhaps?"
It had been far too long, and Jungwon had missed her sarcasm. Laughing, Jungwon held up his hands and signed, feeling the curious eyes of onlookers on the street bearing into him like shards of glass. "No, car was warm. I came out and became a bit cold." Conscious, he held up his hands to his head in circular motions before shaking his head and waving his hands as a "no". "Don't worry."
Chuckling, his grandmother nodded and turned towards the driver gratefully, speaking with her usual air of hospitality. "Thank you for taking care of my grandson. Please come back anytime to get strawberries if you crave some!"
Only when the cab had driven off did Jungwon finally catch a glimpse of the late-afternoon sun, bled out into the clouds that had turned a garish hue of pink and orange. It was a beautiful sight, one that was accompanied by the common quiet of the suburbs. With a small sigh of appreciation, Jungwon turned towards the house after being ushered over by his grandmother, the wheels of his luggage rolling noisily behind him on the concrete road.
"It's a bit messy in here, so be careful of the steps," Jungwon's grandmother chided, guiding him through the door.
Nodding attentively, Jungwon hauled his heavy load through and tried his best to avoid the furniture. After a lot of silent huffing and puffing, Jungwon finally managed to get settled in the attic of the house, where he would be staying for the time being. The attic looked nothing like a plain old room in the roof for storage- instead, after the time and care of his grandparents, had turned into a cozy bedroom, with a small desk, a new lamp that hung from the ceiling instead of the old lightbulb, a carpeted floor replacing the wooden creaks and a brand-new bed.
Jungwon set his suitcase in the middle of the room, feeling fuzzy with happiness. He was eager to settle in as quickly as he could, to explore his new home and every nook and cranny of things he'd never thought he'd see before. This was different to the city. Now, he had control over his own life and his own choices. If Jungwon was completely honest, he was tired of being a burden to his parents and his nuna. Although they had never openly said the words aloud, Jungwon had already known a long time ago, and it only burdened him even more.
Jungwon ducked his head under the low ceiling and climbed down the shallow steps that led from the attic to the rest of the house. Upon his arrival in the living room, his grandmother was there to greet him once more, with the companion of a small box of ripely red and plump strawberries set on the table.
"Jungwon-ah, come, have some of this," his grandmother beckoned him over, and Jungwon gladly walked over, the sweet tang of strawberries hitting his nose and making his head spiral.
Catching his expression, his grandmother let out a chuckle. "Fresh from the farm. Knew you'd like it." With a kind smile, she plucked one of the strawberries onto a small fork and handed it to him, curiously watching as Jungwon held the fruit to his lips and bit down on the sweet flesh. He felt the rich flavour hit him, felt the crunch of the fruit between his teeth and tongue, felt the juice trickle down his chin as he quickly held a palm to his lips to catch the spill.
"You haven't changed one bit besides your looks! You've gotten more handsome but you're still clumsy as ever," his grandmother remarked amusedly. "Come, now, help me prepare the table for dinner."
After they had set the table together, the same grey tablecloth covering the wooden table (with the cutlery just as wooden), Jungwon sat over on the couch, happy to have been of help. Folding his hands over themselves, he glanced at the curtain-closed windows, wondering when his grandfather would return.
Abruptly, the jangling of keys was heard from somewhere downstairs, and his grandmother let out a gasp from the kitchen. "Speak of the devil! Your grandfather's here."
Jungwon hurried over to open the door for his grandfather, who turned from the doorway and stood before him, grunting in surprise when he caught sight of Jungwon. "Oh, you're here already, Jungwon-ah?" he said gruffly, closing the door behind them. "Good to see you. I take it that you've settled in your new home, yes? How was your trip here?"
Jungwon nodded, and slowly signed, "Good."
His grandfather chuckled. "Good. Ah, my eyes are faulty with age. I am not as educated in sign, so you'll have to speak up when you're comfortable, grandson."
"Okay," Jungwon said shyly, taking a deep breath. This was the first time he'd spoken today, and his voice was husky from misuse.
Hearing him, his grandfather's eyes crinkled in the same familiar smile and hung his coat on the doorpost, inviting Jungwon to take their seats over at the dining table. Dinner was cooked in small portions, but Jungwon was more than glad to be able to indulge in his grandmother's homemade curry after a long day of travelling. They didn't talk much over the meal- at least, his grandparents did, asking him questions about his parents and sister, and Jungwon simply signed or spoke up when it was quiet again.
Jungwon excused himself from the table to wash his dishes, and after he put the last plates to the drying rack to be hung, he said his goodnights and turned to the staircase that led to the attic. Tired, he shut the door behind him and slumped against the desk with a sigh, looking at the messy pile of clothes and his other necessities on the floor. He was exhausted, much to say the least, and taking the two hour train ride earlier was enough to drain his social battery.
His attention was briefly diverted towards the buzzing phone on his table. Picking it up, Jungwon held it to the light, pursing his lips when he saw the message was from his sister.
<unread message from "nuna">
jungwon
are you at halmeoni's house already?
you better answer right now or else
Knowing how protective his older sister could be, Jungwon didn't hesitate any longer and replied with a "yes, I'm there" and a quick smiley-face to assure her he was doing okay. Overreacting and over-worrying was a trait of hers, as after all she had become the one responsible for taking care of Jungwon at a young age since their parents had no time to take care of either of them. Jungwon was grateful, and he hoped his nuna knew he was after all these years.
Clicking off his phone with a sigh, Jungwon rubbed his droopy eyelids and stood to rummage through his pile of belongings until his urgent hands settled on his pair of teddy bear pyjamas. His weary body persuaded him a shower could wait until tomorrow.
Pulling the cottony fabric over his head and curling himself into the covers, Jungwon dreamt of dandelions in the wind and empty hands catching dragonflies that never came.