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“An escort,” Earthspirit muttered. “Really?”
She threw a glance over her shoulder at her companions, who were trailing behind her: Eyjafjalla, her colleague, whose presence was warranted; Cardigan, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, hefting around her shield like it was nothing; and a new Leithanien recruit that had recently onboarded, Eben-something-or-other.
Earthspirit couldn’t quite wrap her head around the idea. When Dr. Kal’tsit had written it in her missive, she had tried to argue against it - the trip was a routine geographical survey, and, really, couldn’t she and Eyjafjalla handle themselves just fine? But Dr. Kal’tsit had insisted, and the Doctor themselves had found no fault with it. As Earthspirit saw, it was a waste of money to send out two extra operators on their excursion, but the Doctor had simply shrugged when Earthspirit had brought that up.
Simply thinking about it now was threatening to give her a headache. Had the Doctor taken the piss? Three Leithaniens with their guard dog, and more than half of their names sounded just the same to each other, if she thought about it. Was the Doctor laughing at her? Laughing at her work? She put in 40 hours a week, no overtime, for this?
Maybe, Earthspirit thought, she should brush up on her damn resume when she returned to the landship.
“Fräulein Eyja,” said the idiot in the back, “you seem quite pleased.”
“It’s pretty nice today! You sure know how to pick ‘em, huh?” Cardigan bounced down the trail, her tail wagging lazily. How childish.
“Yes, when it’s overcast like this…” Eyjafjalla smiled softly. “And there’s a gentle breeze… it feels refreshing.”
“Let’s keep this professional, bitte. We are not here to picnic.”
“Verstanden!” Cardigan threw her a playful salute with a wink. “I shall do my best to maintain only the utmost seriousness.” She brandished her shield in front of her, narrowing her eyes to scan the area. “Hmmmm… Over there!”
They all turned to look at the far-off sloping hills. In the distance, a small stream trickled through the grassy valley, cutting through it with ease.
“What?” Earthspirit squinted her eyes, but saw nothing of note. “What is it?”
“Well, since you said picnic, I thought that would make a good spot.”
“Arschgiege,” she mumbled under her breath. She could hear her companions giggling amongst themselves. Ohoho, how hilarious were they! Might as well frolick out in the meadow and stare up at the sky and daydream about nothing! Why even take your work seriously? For God’s sake.
…Well, she could forgive Eyjafjalla. Earthspirit didn’t hold such immaturity against her. Oftentimes, the pair would spend these trips in a comfortable silence, making observations and taking notes as necessary, caching their data, and compiling reports. But it wasn’t unpleasant. Not to Earthspirit.
And not to Eyjafjalla, either, but as Earthspirit watched her out of the periphery of her vision, was she really still so sure?
“Does such language qualify as professional, Operator Earthspirit?” That Ebeneezer was awfully fond of slipping into Leithanien. Perhaps a bit rude, she thought, if it meant they were leaving Cardigan out of the conversation - or he hadn’t quite mastered a more universal tongue.
“What did she say?”
Earthspirit eyed Cardigan carefully. “You speak Leithanien?”
“Ah, yes! Born and raised. What, you didn’t know?”
So four Leithaniens, then. Earthspirit began mentally drafting her next PTO request.
“I admit, I wasn’t aware of that.” She turned to Eyjafjalla with a sigh.“We should be approaching our destination site in thirty meters.”
“Understood.”
“But my Victorian’s just as good, if not better.” Cardigan puffed out her chest with pride. “Wouldn’t you agree?”
“I would,” Eyjafjalla said kindly. “It’s perfect.”
Mr. Eggnog hummed in agreement. “Though, I much prefer Leithanien, when possible.”
“Aw, Ebenholz, your Victorian’s not so bad either!”
That was it.
“Of all things, I’ve never so much as seen you near a piano.” Earthspirit tapped her nails along her staff. It murmured lowly to her, as if even it couldn’t believe the ridiculousness of such a callsign like that. “Is there a story behind that codename?”
“A story behind my codename, you say? Ach, it is not terribly interesting, I’m afraid.”
“Still, I would like to hear it anyway.”
Ebenholz was quiet for a moment. “My music instructor was a pianoman,” he said at last. “He was quite skilled, as a matter of fact. I owe a great deal to him.”
“That’s sweet. ‘Cardigan’ is just my family’s clan!” She tilted her head to the side in thought. “If I had to pick something else, though…”
“How about ‘Windbreaker’?” Eyjafjalla suggested.
“Or ‘Parka,’” Ebenholz added.
“Twenty-three meters to arrival.”
“Well, that’s too long for a codename.” Cardigan frowned, shaking her head in mock disappointment. “I don’t think that would work.”
Earthspirit sighed through her nose. Hard.
“This is where the magic happens, or so I’ve heard,” Cardigan giggled. She stood at attention on the outskirts of their observation site, shield at the ready, ears pricked for suspicious noise. Even Earthspirit was impressed at how she didn’t seem to immediately relax, despite the calm atmosphere. It was just like she thought: a waste of time. A waste of money. A waste of both, really, since time was money!
“You’ve heard correctly.” Eyjafjalla turned to Earthspirit. “Ready to commence when you are.”
“Then let’s not waste any more time than we already have.” As Eyjafjalla clicked her tape recorder, she began her report: “November 9th, about 10:27 A.M. Overcast. Estimated 15 degrees Celsius…”
“It’s nearing that time of year, isn’t it?” Ebenholz muttered to Cardigan. “Soon, it’ll start to snow…”
“If you think this is cold, you should see my hometown! Really, this is nothing. Have you ever been to Karwendel, for instance? No? Well, I wanna say someone’s trying to host a trip there next month! You should come…”
Taking a breath, Earthspirit easily tuned out Cardigan’s incessant chattering and gripped her staff with both hands. If she focused on the whispers that poured forth from it, gradually they would rise in volume until they were a low grumble, and then she could truly get to work.
“Five paces out,” she noted, mostly to herself. “All clear. Ten paces…”
When she was approaching thirty paces, she noticed the clearing had fallen into total silence. Cautiously, Earthspirit lowered her staff. “Something wrong?”
“Not yet,” Cardigan said. Her characteristic cheer had dimmed slightly. “Looks like there’s a caravan out there, so we’ll be okay, I think.”
“You think, or you know?”
“I’m not sure yet.” Cardigan simply shook her head, her hair flopping from side to side. “But it doesn’t look like they’re gonna cross paths with us, so.”
“Your opinion, Ebenholz?” The man hadn’t said a word, but she wouldn’t let go of the fact that he had been gawking at her the whole time.
“We should leave it be. If there’s no trouble, then we needn’t go searching for it.” He turned to look away, but just as his gaze fell from her eyes, she caught the way it flickered to her staff - and lingered, just for a brief moment. But he had nothing else to add.
“Well-said. Resuming my assessment, then, if we’re clear. Thirty-five paces…”
“Do you see them? Over there.” Cardigan jabbed a finger out eastward, as if that would make Eyjafjalla see it any easier. Earthspirit held back an eye-roll. “They don’t look hostile, but you can never be too careful.”
Eyjafjalla nodded, though she seemed unsure. There was just the littlest hint of hesitance to it. Earthspirit could tell.
“Good thing we were here, then! What if something had happened to you? The both of you!” Cardigan made a sound of distress. “Jeez, I’d have been worried sick!”
“Well…” Eyjafjalla blinked owlishly at her. “I’m glad it didn’t come to that.”
“Eyjafjalla and I would have handled ourselves quite fine,” Earthspirit reassured her. “She is a capable operator. So am I, if I need to remind you.”
“Is your staff cleared for combat?”
She glanced at Ebenholz. “Yes, it is. Would you like a demonstration?”
“That’s all right.”
Hmph. Thought so.
Their survey had found nothing particularly alarming. The topography of the land seemed to be suitable for combat, at least, and neither she nor Eyjafjalla had stumbled across anything concerning in the brush.
A waste of time. A waste of money.
“What an exciting day,” Cardigan said, stretching her arms out. “Don’tcha think so?”
Eyjafjalla hummed. “It was nice.”
“I suppose. But the escort seemed…”
“Unnecessary,” Earthspirit finished.
“Perhaps.” Ebenholz shrugged. “It’s hard to say. I was going to say ‘over-cautious,’ myself.”
“Who knows what that Doctor’s thinking, these days?”
That, it seemed, everyone could agree on. Even Earthspirit. She was ready to head back, compile her report, and buy herself a drink - maybe even swing by Provence’s dorm and see if she was in. She was overdue for her lunch, too.
“I’m glad you enjoyed it, at least.” She nodded at Eyjafjalla. “Right?”
“Of course. Is something amiss, um, Miss Earthspirit?”
“No need for formalities, Eyjafjalla, I’ve told you a hundred times. You don’t need to worry about me.” She crossed her arms together. “I’m fine.”
“You had fun, for a change?” A smile was tugging at the corners of Eyjafjalla’s lips. This child…
“I come to work, not to while away the hours, Eyjafjalla.”
“It’s okay,” Eyjafjalla said. She winked conspiratorially at her. “I think you did.”
A waste of time, a waste of money. Truly.
But if it wasn’t on Earthspirit’s dime…
…then it was fine, wasn’t it?