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Nancy Drew never truly left River Heights, at least not in a way that ever allowed Deirdre to forget about her. Sure, Nancy certainly left the city or the state or even the country, gone off galavanting around the globe solving mysteries or whatever the hell it was she did. And yes, sure, maybe she was gone long enough that it allowed Deirdre to start forgetting about her. For Nancy to fade to the back of Deirdre’s mind until she was nothing more than a concept of a girl detective.
And then Deirdre would see Nancy’s name in a news article, or her parents would comment on where she’d last been, and Ned would avoid her at the grocery store, or she’d scroll through her phone and find Nancy’s number resting there unused since high school, or, or, or--
And Nancy would come back, full flesh and blood human being inside Deirdre’s mind.
(It had been during one of these moments, when Nancy had just found the crown jewel belonging to some European royalty too unimportant to show up on Deirdre’s radar, that she’d flown into a fury and posted Nancy’s number across as many different platforms as she could. Back then, if she’d been old enough she would have driven to every bar in the city and scribbled her number across bathroom doors.
But then her father had found out, and she’d gotten in trouble, and blah blah blah. Whatever.
Nancy had never seemed to notice, so it must not have really mattered in the end.
But, then again, if it had affected her, why would she have told Deirdre of all people?)
---
Her father dropped the newspaper on the breakfast table, one finger tapping the headline. “Nancy is back in town.”
Deirdre settled her coffee mug on top of Nancy’s face. “I wasn’t aware she’d ever left.”
“She was in New York,” he said, removing Deirdre’s mug from the paper, “helping find a stolen painting.” It was too early for this, for Nancy to already be on her mind. Annoyance ran through her.
“Let me guess, she found the painting? And uncovered an entire smuggling ring? And then saved a puppy from a tree?” Nancy’s face smiled up at her from where she stood posed next to a painting. It wasn’t even that impressive. “And now they want to make her the president of New York?”
“You don’t need to be so judgemental, Deirdre,” her mother said. “She’s doing good work--why don’t you invite her over sometime?”
Her parents had, at some point, gotten it in their heads that just because Nancy and Deirdre were the same age and their fathers knew each other (everyone’s fathers knew each other in River Heights) and they’d been in the same classes in high school, that they were somehow destined to be best friends forever. That, somehow, it would just take one invite to the house for Deirdre to irrevocably attach herself to Nancy like Bess and George had, and damn herself to a lifetime of dressing like a camp counselor.
Nothing Deirdre did or said could shake that conviction. “Pass,” she said, rolling her eyes. “If I cared that much about what she got up to I’d just read the paper. It would be less painful than actually speaking to her.”
Neither of her parents said anything; her father just pulled the newspaper off the table, while her mother shook her head and sighed. Whatever.
---
The thing was even if her parents hadn’t subjected her to Nancy so early in the morning, Deirdre would have found out barely hours later when she opened instagram.
It was disgusting, really, how predictable Bess and George were. Nancy left and they posted a story wishing her goodbye, tear emojis all over it. Nancy came back and they posted a story celebrating her return, this time with heart emojis. Nancy could sneeze and they’d be posting something.
The three of them were crammed into a table at Scoops, Bess holding the camera, all three of them with a milkshake held up to their face, and Nancy, face blurred as she laughed at something. ‘So happy to have her back again!’ the caption read. Heart eyes emoji. Heart eyes emoji.
Deirdre clicked through it, only to be subjected to the exact same post again because George had shared it. Of course. Nancy was tagged in it too, which meant that she’d probably shared it. Which wasn’t a problem, because they didn’t follow each other to begin with.
Well. They had. Back in high school. But Deirdre had blocked Nancy at one point and Nancy had never refollowed, even after being unblocked a month later.
Deirdre opened Nancy’s profile, against her better judgment, but really it was for reconnaissance. Maybe she’d be able to find out where Nancy was going today and avoid her. Her profile was private, nothing visible to Deirdre except for a list of mutual followers. Bess, George, classmates from high school. The number of posts had gone up since last time.
She closed instagram, shoving her phone back in her pocket.
---
They were still at Scoops when she arrived, despite it being more than enough time for them to finish up and leave. But there was at least one brightside to it all: Ned had arrived.
They saw her the same time she did, heads turning towards the door after the bell, conversation pausing and heads tilting towards each other to whisper. Maybe it should have bothered her, but she wouldn’t be Deirdre Shannon if she didn’t command attention when she entered a room. She slowed to a stop at their table, one hand braced against the back of a chair. “Hey, Ned,” she said, voice sing-song. “Fancy seeing you here.”
Ned jumped, looking up at her. “Oh, uh, hi Deirdre.” He looked from Deirdre, down to Nancy in the chair she was leaning against. For a brief second, Deirdre considered toppling it. And then considered the logistics of that and how capable she’d be at doing so without making a fool of herself. Maybe she would just kick it when she left. Hook her foot around the leg and yank. “Did you need something?”
“Just saying hi,” she said, twisting a piece of hair around her finger. “Give you some more riveting conversation than what you’re currently being subjected to.”
“Oh, please,” George muttered, at the same time Nancy went, “How have you been, Deirdre?”
Polite as always. She resisted the urge to roll her eyes. “Oh, just wonderful. So quiet and uneventful here. Relaxing.” Deirdre tilted her head towards Ned. “Haven’t seen you around much lately.”
“I’ve been busy.” He shifted, uncomfortable. Nancy patted his hand, looking away from Deirdre. This wasn’t even entertaining anymore. “Internships and stuff.”
“We were just talking about it!” Bess added. “Care to join us?”
She did roll her eyes this time. “Please,” she said, “I have better things to do.” She pulled away from the table, shooting Nancy one last glance. Nancy barely even looked over at her, hand still resting over Ned’s. It barely took any time at all for the chatter to pick back up.
Pride dictated that she remain in Scoops, unbothered.
So she did what she had planned from the start and ordered a milkshake, waiting for it at the counter. Toni chatted with her, but half of Deirdre’s mind was on the table behind her, Nancy’s laughter never ending.
---
It had started in tenth grade honors English class. Or maybe it had only surfaced then, all Deirdre’s hatred simmering beneath the surface for years prior. But maybe there hadn’t been anything before that. Maybe it had burst to life that year, hot and ravenous and unreasonable.
But if anyone asked it had started in tenth grade English class during the Shakespeare unit.
She didn’t remember the play they were on, didn’t remember much else from that unit either. Just sitting there some cold February day while her teacher droned on about rhythm and history and an assignment due the next week. Boring things that she didn’t care about.
But she remembered Nancy.
Nancy, who sat in front of her. Nancy, who dressed like somebody’s boring aunt. Nancy, who had a red ponytail that Deirdre stared at every day of class. Nancy, who was always raising her hand, a slender arm reaching into the air, voice bright and energetic no matter the day. Nancy, who was the perfect student. Nancy, who was always right.
Things could have stayed like that; Deirdre watching, Nancy moving. Maybe, years later, Nancy would have been someone her family commented on. Said “oh, look what Nancy Drew is up to, can you believe it?” and she would have still been in newspapers, but she would have been just a name. An old classmate. A sort-of friend. Someone she chatted with in the grocery store on occasion, but no more than that.
And then the group project happened.
---
George always liked to make sarcastic comments about how Deirdre was following Nancy, which was stupid, because everyone knew there were only so many places for people to hang out in River Heights and it wasn’t Deirdre’s fault they were all inconveniently there when she arrived.
Really, at this point if she wanted to avoid them her best bet would be the few shitty bars and even shittier nightclub in River Heights. And none of her friends were currently interesting enough to go drinking with. But at least Nancy wouldn’t be there.
Nancy being back in town meant that Deirdre never got to relax. Every street she went down, every store she went into, a small part of her was braced for impact. Would she be at the grocery store? At Scoops? Pancake Palace for a late breakfast? Walking her dog down the street, two seconds away from stumbling across some crime?
So she waited and waited, going about her days as if nothing had changed.
The impact never came, and two weeks later Nancy had left again.
---
Nancy was gone for a month and came back with a bruise across half her face. Deirdre didn’t ask and there was no article for her parents to shove at her.
---
She had slacked off on her portion of the project--something about their group writing their own scene from a Shakespearean play. Ignored it and did the bare minimum for each draft. Nancy sent texts reminding her to finish, asked if she needed help, but ultimately refused to do any of it for Deirdre.
Their theme was something about revenge and betrayal, a confrontation in a marketplace or a courtroom--the details were fuzzy. She’d gotten bored trying to write any profile for her character, and even more bored trying to come up with actual words for her portion of the script rather than leaving it as vague details.
Deirdre had decided to take the easy way out and googled similar projects online and then just copied it all down.
She’d gotten caught, somehow.
Nancy had figured it out, sat down next to Deirdre and laid out the script she’d emailed Nancy the night before, and explained that she knew Deirdre hadn’t written it and that it was copied and did you know that was plagiarism and against the rules and blah blah blah.
Deirdre wasn’t stupid, she knew it wasn’t ‘right’, but, like, who cared? It was a high school project and who cared if it wasn’t good. They were hardly going to be the only people doing it.
“You know we have to perform these in front of the class, right?” Nancy said, too earnest for such a stupid assignment. “I want it to be good! I’m sure you do, too.”
Deirdre hadn’t cared. Still didn’t care. But she was at Nancy’s house, sitting at her kitchen table, and Nancy was sitting across from her, too serious about this assignment, red hair a halo around her face from the window behind her. And she was saying that Deirdre could do better. That she wanted them to have a better project.
So. Whatever. She could change things. Edit it and make something acceptable. And it wouldn’t be because Nancy asked. It would be because she didn’t want to look like a fool in front of everyone.
---
Nancy Drew waltzed into the party an hour after it started, Ned and her friends in tow.
Normally, if this had happened, Deirdre would have sent a friend to deal with them. And by that she meant have someone shove everyone but Ned out the door and hope that they could convince Ned to stay. He never did, but a girl could dream.
But sometimes to get what you wanted you had to make some concessions. Which was why, in order to get Ned Nickerson to her party, Deirdre had invited the rest of his friends. She was altruistic like that.
Beside her, someone whooped and jumped into the pool, sending up a spray of water that splattered across her. How should she approach them? Should she ignore them?
She leaned back in her chair, tilting her sunhat forward. Fourth of July and the sun was baking her alive.
They saw her. Ned slid his arm into Nancy’s, pulling her close, and fury rose up inside Deirdre. Bess and George’s gazes skipped over her like she was nothing. They weren’t even going to greet her? Her! The host!
Nancy looked at Deirdre. Actually turned her head and looked as she walked by. Her free arm rose in half a greeting, her mouth turned up in the smallest of smiles. Deirdre looked away.
“Rebecca,” she said, after a moment.
And Rebecca, useless, useless Rebecca who was still in her ninety day trial period, perked up. “Yes, Deirdre?”
“Make sure they don’t do anything stupid.”
“Stupid?”
Deirdre rolled her eyes. “Like try and touch stuff inside? Break things? Solve some stupid mystery?” If anyone was going to ruin the party, it was going to be Nancy Drew. If anyone was going to draw attention away from Deirdre, it was going to be Nancy. Rebecca continued looking at her. “Well? Go!”
Rebecca scrambled off and Deirdre pushed herself off of the chair and towards the pool. It was her party and she could enjoy it just fine.
---
Nancy was in the pool next to Deirdre. Too close and leeching sanctimonious attitude into the water.
Deirdre should have told Rebecca to keep them out of the pool, not just the house.
Deirdre should kick Nancy out of the pool herself.
Deirdre never should have invited Nancy to begin with.
She pushed herself away from the side of the pool, letting the water carry her towards Nancy. She came to a stop, water sloshing around her shoulders. Nancy turned towards her, unimpressed expression on her face. She didn’t say anything. Deirdre didn’t want her to say anything.
“Ned left you all alone?” she cooed. “Bet he’s off finding more interesting girls.” Nancy’s face didn’t shift. No reaction; was Deirdre so predictable now? “How does it feel to be left alone?” More water lapped up against her chin; she pushed her toes against the pool bottom, bobbing in the water.
“Nice to see you, too, Deirdre.” Nancy had one arm against the side of the pool, steady where it was shallow enough she could touch. Red hair clung to her shoulders where it escaped her braid. Deirdre felt her own stick to her neck and around her ears. “Your party is nice.”
So bland. So boring. Anger grew in Deirdre’s chest. The facade had to slip at some point. What would it take to get a reaction? “I’m sure you’ve never experienced anything like it before.”
There was a glint in Nancy’s eyes. Something shot through Deirdre. “Oh, I was actually at a ball earlier this month.” Earlier this month when she’d been somewhere that wasn’t in River Heights. Earlier this month when she had disappeared for several weeks finally allowing Deirdre time to relax. “How are your parents?”
“Up at the lake.” Where else would they be? It was the Fourth of July, they lived in the midwest, everyone knew where the Shannons went in the summer. Deirdre felt her muscles tighten, let herself sink in the water, pushed herself back up. “You never answered my question, by the way. What kind of boyfriend leaves his girlfriend all alone at a party?”
She wanted a reaction. She wanted Nancy to yell. She wanted blood in the water.
Nancy’s jaw clenched, Deirdre’s heart raced. This was it, this was it. “Deirdre--”
“Nancy!”
They both jerked, looking towards the voice. Ned was making his way towards the pool, two drinks in hand. “Nancy!” he said again. “Sorry I took so long, the line was huge!”
Nancy turned away from Deirdre, placing her palms flat on the cement. “Don’t worry about it Ned; I was enjoying myself in the pool.”
Deirdre watched as he shifted the drinks in his hands, as he stuck out his palm, as he pulled Nancy from the pool. Water dripped down her body, slid off the ugly one piece she wore. Deirdre watched as it obscured the palm prints left behind. Watched as Nancy pressed her arm against Ned’s, as she took the drink from him. As they walked away towards a bonfire, leaving Deirdre floating in the water.
And not once, from the moment Ned arrived, did Nancy look back at Deirdre.
---
Deirdre passed the assignment just fine. Probably would have even if Nancy hadn’t been such a teacher’s pet the entire time. She didn’t come out of the project hating Nancy--just called her ‘annoying’ and ‘overbearing’ in the peer evaluation form. Nancy didn’t hate her either, at least as far as Deirdre could tell.
She was just boring. Boring and in all of Deirdre’s classes, but before when she’d been nothing but another face, now she was--
Maybe, in retrospect, things could have turned out differently. Maybe Deirdre could have pursued a friendship. Maybe they could have been partners in the rest of their classes. Maybe they could have been casual friends who only spoke at school or in grocery store lines or at the boring parties her parents held.
Instead Deirdre never bothered to pursue anything further. She’d like whatever instagram posts she saw even if they weren’t that good, wave at her in the hall, smile at her and her friends, but never anything more and therefore avoided the fate of being Nancy Drew’s lackey.
Nancy Drew solved her first major case two months later.
---
Nancy Drew stumbled out of a burning building and was arrested the next day. It was, possibly, the most exciting thing Deirdre had ever witnessed. Of course, she had to deal with all the bullshit of being interviewed by the police and having to explain what was going on. “Oh, the smoke was smoke-colored. Oh, I saw Nancy Drew walk into the building and come out later. No, I didn’t see anyone else come in.” Boring stuff and now her parents were all worried about things. Which was nonsense, because she hadn’t even been in the fire, only by it. (She did have a moment where she imagined if she had been in the fire. What kind of story she’d come out with, the interviews she’d give, the way people would fawn over her.)
“Can you believe that the Drew girl was arrested?” her mother asked the next day. “For arson of all things!”
Deirdre stirred her coffee. “I mean, is it really any surprise?” Her mother raised her eyebrow and Deirdre elaborated. “Like, think about it. Do you honestly think someone who solves that many mysteries is a law-abiding citizen?” She let her spoon clatter onto her plate, lifting her mug to take a sip. “That all that evidence just fell into her hands, perfectly legally? It was only a matter of time before she showed her true colors.”
It was only a shame that she hadn’t gotten caught while in the middle of a case, that her entire facade was crumbling during a game rather than anything of actual importance.
“I can see where you’re coming from, Deirdre,” her father said. “But do you honestly think the Drew girl would do something like that?”
Deirdre pictured Nancy getting led out of her house in handcuffs, sitting in the backseat of a police car. Pictured her sitting alone in a jail cell, hours after crawling out of a burning building.
She took another sip of her coffee. The smell of smoke burned her nostrils. “Yes,” she lied. “Yes, I do.”
---
Sitting in the house all day meant hearing her parents talk about Nancy’s arrest and it meant having the news channel constantly on and it meant seeing footage of the fire and of Brenda Carlton, with her plastic hair and caked on face, waving her microphone in front of anyone who walked by, demanding their opinion on the ‘most shocking twist in all of River Heights history’.
So, bored and irritated, Deirdre went to Scoops.
And, of course, because this town wanted her to suffer, George and Bess were there, huddled around a small table with Ned, faces tight and drawn. They were whispering among themselves urgently. Deirdre let her eyes bounce off them as she walked past their table, ordered her shake, and made idle conversation with Toni about how terrible yesterday had been.
The others continued whispering behind her.
She took a seat outside, settling in with her notebook and phone. Flipping open to a random page she only found notes on the scavenger hunt. It didn’t take long for the others to filter out of the store. Ned first, his shoulders tense, hand rattling against his thigh as he walked. He didn’t look at her, and neither did George when she followed after, spinning her car keys around her finger and no less anxious. And then, finally, Bess settling down at the table across from her, a bowl of ice cream in front of her.
She was very, very bad at pretending like she wasn’t watching Deirdre.
Well. Who really cared if they thought Deirdre was a suspect. She knew she hadn’t burned down the old town hall.
And she was pretty sure Nancy Drew hadn’t either.
---
The week after she solved her first major case, Nancy Drew appeared on TV and Deirdre watched.
It wasn’t willingly, of course. Her parents had put on the channel and Deirdre was in the room and there Nancy was, standing behind a podium, hair pulled neatly back and wearing a ‘vintage’ dress, if Deirdre were to be polite. The smile on her face was huge.
It was hardly the first time someone from school had been on the news. There were countless championships, teens winning competitions and going regional and then national, clubs gathering money for charity or sponsorships or any other number of things. In middle school, Deirdre had been in an interview, back when she was still part of Girl Scouts. It was all the same. Nancy wasn’t special.
Nancy, small on the television screen, half hidden behind the podium, talked a lot. Answered questions, praised others, condemned the thieves as if everyone wasn’t already aware that robbing a museum was illegal. Deirdre rolled her eyes, kept scrolling through instagram, tried to ignore the ego trip happening on screen.
“But how did you know they were fakes?” a reporter asked Nancy.
“I have my English teacher to thank for that,” Nancy said. Deirdre lowered her phone. “We’ve had a variety of projects this semester, and for them I’ve been doing a lot of research. It was that research that--”
“Deirdre,” her father said, turning to look at her, “weren’t you two in a group project together?”
---
If Deirdre had been the one accused of burning down the old town hall, she would have been out of jail immediately. Everyone would have known it was impossible for it to have been her and the fact that they thought Nancy Drew was the one who had done it, that it was reasonable for her to be an arsonist only meant that everyone was finally catching onto her actual character.
Maybe, if Deirdre were lucky, they’d realize that Nancy was cheating her way through the Clues Challenge as well and that was the only reason she was so far ahead of everyone else.
But Deirdre wasn’t accused and Nancy Drew was rotting in jail and now her friends, who couldn’t accept the truth, were accusing Deirdre of it.
“You think I’m the arsonist!” She laughed, rolling her eyes. “That’s cute. You’re priceless.”
Bess was standing above her, doing her best to look intimidating, as if she hadn’t spent the past three hours eating bowl after bowl of ice cream until she looked nauseous. As if she wasn’t so bad at whispering that Deirdre could overhear every phone call she had. As if Deirdre wasn’t now very aware of how bad Nancy’s situation was. “I’m serious, Deirdre. If you know something, say it. You were there at the scene. I don’t believe you were just walking by.”
“Or what?” She stirred her milkshake and took a sip. “You should be spending your time better by baking the actual arsonist a cake with a saw in it. Not by trying to interrogate me about something I had nothing to do with.”
“So you’re saying you actually believe Nancy did it?” Bess asked. “No one else? Not Brenda, not Toni, not Alexei?”
The town had already turned against Alexei once before, Brenda was a freak who dressed up as people, and Toni had plenty of pull in the town. And Nancy had been beloved by all up until yesterday. There were plenty of explanations, plenty of directions to go, but it was Nancy who had crawled out of that building.
Nancy, who had been there alone. Nancy, who Deirdre had been following in the hours beforehand.
Nancy, who was innocent.
“What are you expecting from me?” Deirdre asked. The condensation on her cup was slick beneath her fingers. “A confession? For me to suddenly remember that I saw--what?--a masked figure with a bottle of gasoline walk into the town hall after Nancy? That I believe she’s innocent and could never do this? You’re not going to get it.”
Bess just stared at her for a long moment, twisting her fingers together. “The truth would be nice.”
Her cup slammed down onto the table. “I think I just heard Toni call your order.”
---
Three months after her first major case, Nancy Drew solved her second one, this time out of state. By the time the long weekend was over and she was back in town, it was all anyone at the school was talking about.
And then another month after that she solved another one. And two weeks after that she stopped a sabotage attempt against the football team, securing a victory against their rival school.
Another month after that she solved another case. And another and another and another.
“I don’t get what’s so special about her,” Deirdre said, stabbing at the pathetic salad that came with the school lunch. “Like, who decided that we all have to care about what one girl gets up to in her free time?”
Zoey, who was dangerously close to no longer being allowed to sit with Deirdre, shrugged a shoulder. “Well, she did find a stolen painting. I don’t see any of us doing that.”
“It was pure chance she solved it!” Anybody could have done it. Deirdre could have done it.
“Solve that many crimes?” Zoey asked, eyebrow raised. Deirdre resolved to have her replaced by the end of the semester.
“The only thing that makes her special,” she snapped, stabbing at her tray, “is that she has a dead mom.”
Zoey gasped, admonishing her, and Deirdre rolled her eyes. It was hardly a crime to say that. She’d even felt bad, back when she’d heard it happened. But that was before Nancy was more than just a name.
Across the cafeteria, Nancy ate with her friends.
---
When Deirdre was at school she didn’t have any boyfriends. She had boys--ones from class who wanted to study with her, ones from group projects, the single friends of her roommate’s boyfriend. Frat boys and football players and losers from general education credits who made jokes about her being the ‘bad cop’ when she told them she was majoring in criminology.
They were bad at flirting, worse at kissing, and completely uninteresting to Deirdre. Ned was either in River Heights and avoiding her or away at Emerson. It wasn’t like she didn’t want a boyfriend, and it wasn’t like she was hung up on Ned (he was painfully devoted to Nancy), but she had high standards and no one was matching them.
Still, she was bored, and Nancy being in jail was only so entertaining and maybe Ned was opening his eyes, because he asked her out on a date of all things. And she’d accepted and gone home to change and--look, she wasn’t stupid. She knew this was a ploy. That they were probably investigating her things or asking her friends questions or any other number of things to prove that she was the real arsonist and poor, persecuted Nancy was innocent.
Didn’t mean she couldn’t have a little fun with it.
They went to a coffee shop, away from Bess and Toni and any evidence Deirdre might have left behind, far enough away that she wouldn’t be able to see them snooping.
Deirdre had wondered about this, about how dating Ned Nickerson would feel. For years she’d seen him following Nancy around, brushing hair out of her face, holding her hand in the street, laughing with her at tables, leaning down to kiss her. She’d seen them sitting across from each other at restaurants, lost in each other's eyes, and imagined herself in that position.
What it would feel like, what it would be like.
It felt like nothing.
Ned sat across from her, worn jacket on, bags under his eyes from lack of sleep, face tight from stress and discomfort. Deirdre laughed at the right times, twirled her hair, asked him questions about himself and limited the digs she made towards Nancy. His phone buzzed across the table, text after text from George and Bess and Nancy coming through. He smiled sheepishly, silenced it and tucked it into his pocket. “Must be a breakthrough on the case,” he said.
She sucked in her cheeks. “You know, Nedstopher,” she said, tapping one finger against her coffee cup, “I didn’t take you for the kind of guy to ditch his girlfriend after a single act of arson.” He started to stumble through an explanation, but she waved her hand. “I’m not judging. Maybe this was a good thing for you. With her in jail for the rest of her life, who knows what opportunities will open up for you!”
Ned gave her a brittle smile and the date ended soon after.
---
It wasn't hard to come up with reasons to hate Nancy, if she put her mind to it.
---
No one warned her Nancy Drew was released from jail until she appeared outside of Scoops, looming over Deirdre’s table.
“You look like shit,” Deirdre said. It wasn’t even being mean to say that, considering how Nancy was standing there with unbrushed hair and wrinkled clothes. Really, if she was trying to convince people she wasn’t guilty of arson she could have put a little more effort into her appearance.
Nancy didn’t waste time on pleasantries. “Why were you at the fire, Deirdre?” she asked. “Why were you following me?”
Oh, so they knew about that. She checked her nails, flipped a page in her notebook. “Just so you know,” she said, “I don’t care about the Clues Challenge. Really, I don’t. But my dad will not shut up about me being involved and so--” she waved her hands “--here I am!” Nancy frowned, opening her mouth. “Oh, don’t hurt your brain,” Deirdre said. “I was trying to catch you cheating.”
“Cheating.” Her voice was flat, her grip flexed once on the back of the chair. “You thought I was cheating.”
And here she was acting all high and mighty. “I thought we were all cheating,” Deirdre huffed. “I was cheating, I thought it would be fun to show everyone the true you.” She still wasn’t convinced that Nancy hadn’t. Surely she had some connection in the organization or had broken into their offices the week before and gotten all the clues. There was no way she was so far ahead of Deirdre based on skill alone. She laughed. “But then you went and burned a building down!”
“I didn’t--!” Nancy sucked in a breath, one hand coming up to rub her forehead. “You didn’t see anything? You’re sure.” She gave Deirdre an imploring look. “Please.”
She gnawed on her lip. Watched the way Nancy’s shoulders hunched, the white knuckled grip on the chair. Thought of the way she’d been released from jail and immediately gone to figure out who had actually done it. The worn out expression, the tangles in her hair. “I’m not hiding anything, Nancy.” Over Nancy’s shoulder Bess was listening in rapt attention, pencil poised over a notepad. “I swear.”
---
“I can’t believe she exposed Brenda and won the Clues Challenge,” Holly said. “Like who else!”
Deirdre scoffed. “I’m still not convinced she wasn’t cheating.” They were huddled in the corner of the room, cups in hand and watching the party move around them.
“Why did you invite her then?” Across the room, Nancy and her friends were in a circle. For the past hour, people had been coming up to them. Probably apologizing or praising them or swooning over them. Claiming they had never doubted her ever in their lives, that they always knew it was her and that Brenda had always had something wrong with her.
But Deirdre knew. Deirdre had seen the posts, heard the whispers. Been there as everyone flipped back and forth to be on the winning side.
“My parents made me invite them,” she lied. “Because they’re the winners and good sportsmanship and all that bullshit.” The only way to get Ned to come had been to invite the others. Deirdre drained the rest of her drink, grimacing at the taste. Maybe if she were lucky Nancy would get drunk and make a fool of herself tonight.
The party swept onwards. People spoke to Deirdre and the conversations slid out of her mind. Holly and Jessica disappeared at one point, leaving Deirdre alone in the corner of the room at her own party. Her own party and she wasn’t even the center of attention. But then again, why would she be? Nancy was here.
She needed air.
Deirdre pushed herself away from the wall and through the crowd, towards the balcony. The curtains had been pulled to the side and through the glass she saw a flash of red hair and a blue dress. Her hand paused over the handle, grip tightening on her cup.
She turned, searching the crowd. Ned was in the corner, surrounded by his old teammates and gesturing wildly. Bess and George were split up on opposite sides of the room. She turned back around, pushing open the door and stepping out into the summer night.
“Avoiding the party?” Deirdre asked.
Nancy stayed where she was, leaning against the railing, staring out across the Shannon’s backyard. “Hey, Deirdre.”
She settled against the railing, inches away from Nancy. “You didn’t answer my question. Got tired of being fawned over?”
“Just needed some air.”
An overplayed pop song filtered through the doors. Nancy didn’t move, didn’t say anything more, just kept staring straight ahead. “I heard they threw a brick through your window.”
Nancy scoffed. “Broke my window, threw me under the bus, framed me, spread rumors about me.” She still wasn’t looking at Deirdre, eyes fixed on the distance. “Arrested me.”
The question came before she could stop it. “Why do you do all this?” Nancy jerked, looking at Deirdre for the first time that night. “If everyone is just going to turn against you in the end, why do you even bother?”
Nancy blinked at her. “I like helping people.”
She said it like it was the simplest thing in the world, like there was no other reason someone would go to the lengths she did. Like that was the only motive she’d ever had. “Oh come on,” Deirdre said. “It’s just us out here. You can tell the truth. It strokes your ego? The pay is good? Be real.”
“What do you want me to say?” she asked, frustrated. “And why do you even care? I thought you hated me.”
“Oh, I do.”
“Goodnight--”
“Grow up.” She took a sip of her drink, tilted her head back to look at the sky. “I don’t hate you-hate you. It’s just fun for me. What Brenda did was shitty and unfair. Honestly,” she said, and here the words were coming faster than she wanted, “I’m glad you’re not in jail.” Nancy’s eyebrows raised at that. “It would have thrown off the whole equilibrium.” She gestured, looking away. “I never really believed you did it.”
“Well…” Hesitating, Nancy leaned back against the railing. Deirdre felt the heat radiating off her. “That’s very nice of you. Thank you.”
Below, the party began to spill out into the backyard. “You know--” Deirdre licked her lips “--if I were you I’d be letting loose a bit more.” She nodded at Nancy’s empty hands. “Not even a single drink?” Nancy shrugged. The breeze caught a strand of her hair, pulling it across her face. “What are you afraid of? That Brenda escaped custody and is hiding in a bush somewhere, ready to snap a picture? ‘Breaking News! Local 21-year-old Caught Drinking Alcohol!’”
She didn’t laugh at it, just glanced down at Deirdre’s half empty cup and then back up at her face. “Oh, come on.” Deirdre shoved the cup towards her. “Just one sip.”
“I don’t get why it matters to you.”
Because. Because, because, because.
Because she’d seen Nancy’s post-win post-exoneration interview. Because it had been the same as every other interview she’d given before. Because she’d been perfectly poised and diplomatic and thanked everyone for their hard work. Because she’d won the Clues Challenge and never cheated. Because afterwards she’d accepted the invite to Deirdre’s party and smiled at everyone who had said she was guilty just days before. Because in none of this-- none of it-- had Deirdre seen any of the rundown, angry Nancy that she’d seen outside Scoops that day.
“Because,” she said, tilting the cup towards Nancy, “I want you to.”
Nancy looked at her, eyes searching Deirdre’s face for something. Her hand came up slowly, wrapped around the cup, fingers overlapping Deirdre’s own. Deirdre’s heart started pounding in her chest. Nancy slid the cup out of Deirdre’s grasp, brought it to her lips, and finished it.
She handed it back to Deirdre. There was a lipstick stain on the rim. “I never really suspected you.”
“How kind of you,” Deirdre said. The lipstick stain stared at her. The cheap plastic flexed under her fingers. Nancy was inches away, the music pounded inside her ribs. Someone yelled in the yard, there was a splash in the pool.
Words were bubbling at the back of her throat. Something inside Nancy was peeking out. If she just pushed then maybe Deirdre could reveal the truth. Show the world who Nancy Drew really was.
Show that they were the same inside.
“I--”
Nancy’s phone chimed, cutting Deirdre off. “Sorry,” she said, digging into her purse. “I bet it’s Ned looking for me.”
Deirdre’s jaw snapped shut. She turned, looking through the glass, past the reflection of her and Nancy alone on the balcony. Ned stood in the corner, eyes on his phone. Besides her, Nancy typed on her own.
She could see it now. Nancy disappearing into the party, Ned wrapping his arm around her, them sliding out the door to go home. And then what? And then what? Nancy against the door, Nancy against the wall, her hands in his hair, his hands on her. Nancy in his bed, Ned in hers. Him sliding the dress off her shoulders, her mouth on his neck. She crunched the cup in her hands.
Nancy didn’t deserve him.
Zipping her purse shut, Nancy smiled at Deirdre. “Time for me to go. This was a nice party--”
“I don’t know what he sees in you.”
She froze, halfway to the door. “Sorry?”
Her face grew hot in anger. “I said, I don’t know what he sees in you.”
She didn’t say anything for a long moment, hand poised halfway to the handle. “Of course you wouldn’t.”
There was no rage in it. No shock or horror. Deirdre stood there, crumpled cup still in her hand, Nancy looking at her, face perfectly blank, as if Deirdre were some child throwing a fit. As if she weren’t worth a reaction.
As if Nancy was better than her.
She opened the door, back turned to Deirdre. “Have a nice night.”
Deirdre couldn’t look away. Couldn’t stop watching as Nancy found Ned, as it played out as she predicted. Kept staring even as she lost sight of them in the house. Kept standing there on the balcony, waiting for the sound of his car to start. Stood there until she couldn’t hear the engine any longer, cup still in hand.