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It was a beautiful day today. Well, as beautiful as a day could get on Yashiori, and Yamashi was in his room reading since he had the free time. He was having a good day, his parents were in a good mood and even his baby brother seemed to be having a good day.
But after a while, a severe sense of doom washed over Yamashi. Something was wrong. Something was REALLY wrong. He gets up from his bed and grabs a bat that he'd hidden under a floorboard. A precaution that now he was glad he'd taken. Yamashi exits his room and scours the house, peeking into every room, where did his parents go again? Not important... He keeps looking.
Eventually, Yamashi finds himself in a kitchen, facing a man with a knife, Yamashi can't make out his face but he knows this is where the danger is coming from. So he starts hitting... And he doesn't stop, bludgeoning the intruders head in with the bat with terror. And he only stops when the body stops moving. Yamashi doesn't feel anything. He calmly drags the body out of the house and- does the village seem emptier? Never mind that- he's doing something- and rolls it into that chasm. Then he cleans up and hides the bat again.
Yamashi returns to his book, and feels nothing at what he did. He doesn't quite remember where he was so he starts the chapter again, and soon a six year old Heizou joins him, a bruise forming on his arm. Yamashi frowns at the injury but reads to his brother. Smiling as his baby brother curls into his side and asks what exactly he's reading.
"I'm reading a mystery book," Yamashi says, watching Heizou absolutely light up and adjust so he can try to read along, but the book is still a little complex for a home-schooled kid like Heizou. Yamashi winces, knowing that he isn't the best teacher, and their mom refuses to teach anything their dad doesn't approve.
Weeks pass and Yamashi gets that feeling if doom again. But its louder. More urgent. He grabs the bat and runs. He gets to the main room, and his father is towering over Heizou. Heizou, who looks terrifies and covered in dirt and bruises. Yamashi feels fury explode inside him and slams the bat into his father's head. And he does it again. And again. And again. There's blood seeping from his father's head and a rage in his body that he can't quell.
Distantly he feels himself tell Heizou to go to his room, and Yamashi grabs a knife. Then there's a knife in his dad's shoulder and Yamashi keeps attacking his father. There's blood on the mats and in his hair and sliding on his skin and his dad is screaming obscenities and pleas for Yamashi to let him live. But he doesn't stop, desperate and slightly unhinged giggles escape the seventeen year old and he watches the light leave the man's eyes.
And it felt amazing. Like a weight was being lifted from Yamashi's shoulders as he murders his father in cold blood. When he stops he's bloody and smiling. He did it.
No more training. No more bruises. No more having to be perfect. Yamashi disposes of the body the same way as the criminal and cleans up, before going to comfort Heizou.
....
Thirty-one year old Shikanoin Yamashi wakes up with a deep breath, and sits up from his tatami mat. 'What the fuck was that?' He wonders, thinking of the violent and vivid dream he'd had.
And then the guilt sets in... Maybe if Yamashi had actually done that, maybe Heizou would still be around. Maybe if Yamashi had been a better brother, maybe Heizou wouldn't have been hurt at all... Maybe he'd still be around and talk to him.
Yamashi sighs and gets up. Today is a new day.