Chapter Text
Jason couldn’t suppress the whine that tore out of his throat as he regained consciousness. His entire lower body throbbed and he had no idea where he was or how he’d got there. He flickered his eyes open and blinked several times until the room around him came into focus.
He was lying in the centre of a very crudely put together nest on a bed in a very sparsely decorated room. That and the lack of scent in the room and in the nesting materials pointed towards him being in a safehouse. Just whose safehouse though, he had no idea.
He tried to sit up, but that just increased the ache between his legs, and to his horror, also tugged painfully at his throat. His breathing picked up as he reached a hand up to his neck only to find his mating gland covered in a bandage. He could feel worry and slight panic in his chest that didn’t belong to him and that just cemented what had happened. He couldn’t breathe. He’d spent so long making sure no one could use his designation against him and now someone had and he couldn’t even remember who.
“Jay, Jace, Jason!”
He snapped his head up to find Roy hovering on the edge of the badly made nest, looking like he wanted to reach out but not knowing if that’s what Jason wanted.
“Jay, you gotta breathe.” Roy said slowly, trying to exude calm.
Jason shook his head because the other person’s panic was rising in response to his and it was like a positive feedback loop because it just caused his panic to ratchet even higher. He pressed his hand to his chest hoping to alleviate some of the feeling but it didn’t work.
“Fuck. You can feel him panicking in response to you panicking, can’t you?” Roy said, but Jason had no idea what he was talking about. “Wait here.” Roy ran out.
Jason watched him go and tried to bring his breathing under control, but each time he thought he’d managed, something else twinged to remind him what state his body was in. He had no idea how long Roy was gone, it could have been seconds, or minutes, but when he came back he wasn’t alone.
The smell of caramel popcorn and chocolate cut through everything else and Jason felt a tug in his chest that made him want to bury himself in the scent.
“Jay, I’m so sorry.”
He opened his eyes to find Dick sitting on the edge of the bed with Roy hovering behind him. Dick looked like Jason felt, his hair was all over the place and he looked like he hadn’t slept in days. He had a bandage over his mating gland that matched the one on Jason’s neck, and the sight of it was what finally made things start to fall into place.
Jason took a deep breath, Dick’s presence seemed to have eased most of the panic. “I can’t- I don’t remember anything.”
Roy clenched his jaw, looking like he was seconds away from punching someone in the face, whereas Dick looked like he was about to cry.
“I’m not- I’m not entirely sure of all the details before I got there.” Dick started, keeping his eyes on the blanket in front of him. “From what I gathered, Black Mask set a trap for you using some pups off the street and then knocked you out. I don’t know if he already knew, or if he figured it out when they took your helmet off, but he found out you’re an omega. He then reset the trap, using you as the bait this time, and I fell for it. He gave you a heat inducer and then gave me a rut inducer and locked us in a room together. I can’t remember anything after that until I came out of it, but I think you’ve probably guessed by now what happened.”
Dick took a deep breath and swallowed thickly. “I didn’t think you’d want the bats involved so I called Roy and he helped me bring you here. I’m sorry. I should have known it was a trap or tried harder to stop him, or-”
“Dickie,” Jason cut him off, really not in the mood for Dick’s martyr complex. “not your fault, and that doesn’t change what happened.”
Dick nodded and chewed on his lip. “I could- I could break it.”
“No!” For some reason that thought caused the panic to surge back up inside Jason’s chest. He knew Dick could feel it through the bond because the alpha clutched at his chest like it was a physical pain. Jason took a breath and tried to explain. “No, don’t, please. Not yet. I think if you break it now my instincts are just going to go even more out of whack.”
Surprisingly, Dick looked relieved at Jason’s answer. Jason realised he was probably feeling it in the same way Jason was but was willing to put that to the side if Jason had asked him to; self sacrificing bastard .
“Okay, I won’t break it. Not until you ask me to.” Dick said before chewing his lip again. “Do you want me to stick around, or do you want some space to figure all this out?”
Part of Jason hated that Dick had put that ball in Jason’s court, the other part (the part that had been pining after Dick Grayson since before he presented) was glad Dick was letting him decide. He was pretty sure if Dick stuck around right now that he would never find the strength to ask Dick to break the bond. The situation was beginning to truly sink in and it made Jason want to throw up because being bonded to Dick was something he’d thought about on more than one occasion, but Black Mask had once again taken something that should be happy and their choice , and forced it onto them without either of their consent.
“I think-” Jason swallowed down the bile that wanted to make its way up his throat. “I think I need space. Just- I need to process everything you’ve told me.”
Dick nodded but Jason felt a swell of disappointment through the bond before Dick got it under control. “Okay. You know where to find me and if you need anything, Jay, don’t hesitate to call.”
Jason nodded and watched Dick walk out before turning his attention back to Roy, who still looked ready to punch someone in the face. “Can I stay here?”
Roy looked at him like he’d grown another head. “What kind of fucking question-” He muttered before taking a deep breath. “Jaybird, do you really think I’d kick you out right now?”
Jason shrugged, idly playing with a loose thread on the blanket in his lap.
“Goddamn bats.” Roy said under his breath. “I’m ordering food, you want pizza or Thai?”
“Thai.” Jason said, finally swinging his legs out of bed and standing. Or well, attempting to stand, because as soon as he tried to put his weight on his legs they crumpled. Roy jolted forward and caught him before he could hit the floor and kept a grip on his arm until the feeling came back in Jason’s legs.
“You good?”
“Yeah, I’m gonna grab a shower.” Jason said.
“Cool, there’s spare towels in the cupboard under the sink and help yourself to whatever is in the wardrobe.” Roy said as he walked out.
Jason knew there would be a conversation later, Roy would make sure he got everything off his chest that he needed to and give him a space to properly process what had happened, but Roy recognised that he needed to work through it in his own head first. Jason knew that was one of the reasons he and the former Titan had clicked so well when they formed the Outlaws and everything that came after.
Jason took a deep breath and turned on the shower as he tried to sort through his own thoughts and feelings.
Jason took one week off before he went back to patrolling. Roy had given him a hard stare and asked if he was sure he wanted to go back so soon, but apparently Jason’s answer was good enough because he didn’t bring it up again. Jason thought it probably helped that he had practically moved into Roy’s spare room, so the beta was able to see Jason’s state for himself each night.
It took Jason running into Dick on his fourth day back to realise he hadn’t actually given any thought to what he was going to say next time he saw him.
“Hey.” Nightwing said as he reached up and turned off his comm. Jason felt a twinge of nervousness through the bond and was sure Dick was feeling the same from him.
“Hey.” Jason mimicked, not making a move to take his helmet off because it wasn’t like Dick needed facial cues when they could both feel the others emotions through the bond.
“I wasn’t- I’m surprised you didn’t take longer off.” Dick said, keeping his eyes on his hands.
“I took more time than you did.” Jason said, trying not to let his annoyance at the statement show because just because he was an omega didn’t mean he was a delicate little flower that needed to be coddled.
“No, I didn’t mean- Fuck, I’m sorry. I don’t think my instincts have settled yet, it’s like my protectiveness is dialled to eleven.” Dick explained, swaying in place slightly in the way Jason knew meant he was itching to fly to work off nervous energy.
Jason sighed, but it just came through the helmet as static. “I know, it’s… an adjustment.”
“That’s one way to put it.” Dick gave him a small smile. “Look-”
“Nightwing! Why are you not answering your comm?” Robin cut off whatever Dick was going to say as he swung onto their roof.
Jason felt a wave of annoyance from Dick and resisted the urge to laugh. But he did wonder what Dick had been about to say.
“I turned it off, what’s up?” Dick said with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.
Damian looked between them suspiciously. “Something is happening by the docks, Batman wants us to take a look.”
“Well, that’s my cue to leave, you both have fun with that.” Jason said as he pulled out his grapple and shot off a line.
“Hood-”
He didn’t stick around to hear what Dick had to say, especially in front of the demon brat.
The next few weeks went by surprisingly quickly and nothing out of the ordinary seemed to happen. Jason’s patrols went about as well as they usually did and he barely saw Dick. From what he’d gathered through Bat chatter, Dick was working a pretty big case in Bludhaven so he hadn’t been back in Gotham since their conversation on the rooftop had been cut short. Part of Jason was glad because it meant he could put off the inevitable conversations they would have to have, but his omega viewed Dick’s alpha as its mate, no matter the circumstances the bonding had happened under, and was starting to get angsty at staying away.
A month and a half after what Jason was just referring to as ‘the incident’, Roy came back home with a pharmacy bag in his hand and a frown on his face. Jason would have been able to tell he was nervous, even if his scent wasn’t broadcasting it.
“What’s wrong?” Jason asked, sitting up from where he’d been laying on the ratty couch reading.
Roy took a deep breath. “I have no idea how to say this, but Jay, you smell different.”
“Yeah, that happens when you’re bonded to someone, doesn’t it?” Jason pinched his eyebrows together.
“Yeah, but it’s been changing for the past week, but it was only this morning I think I figured out why.” Roy shifted forward and perched on the coffee table in front of where Jason was sitting. “Fuck, I’m just going to get to the point, Jay, I think you’re pregnant. You smell pregnant.”
And that was not at all what Jason expected Roy to say. He definitely did not expect Roy to reach into the pharmacy bag and pull out three different brands of pregnancy tests.
“I’m on suppressants.” Jason said, staring at the tests in his hands. “No, I can’t- I can’t be.”
“Jaybird, we have no idea what kind of inducers Black Mask gave you and Dick. You know there are kinds that make birth control irrelevant.” Roy leaned forward to basically force Jason to make eye contact. “If you are, you’ll have options and you’ve got me, I’ll support you no matter what. But you can’t make any choices and take any of those options if you don’t know if you are or not.”
Jason knew he was right, but he still struggled to swallow back the panic that was trying to claw its way up his throat. He felt a twinge of worry through the bond and tried to send back calm and content signals because the last thing he wanted right now was for Dick to show up worried because Jason was panicking.
“Okay, I’m gonna…” He grabbed the tests and made a beeline for the bathroom.
He used all three because he’d rather cover all the bases. Once he was done he left them on the counter, washed his hands, set an alarm on his phone and made his way back into the living room. Roy was sat on the sofa with his hands clasped in front of him. He looked up just in time to catch the phone Jason threw at him, looking at it with understanding as Jason dropped down onto the other side of the sofa and curled up as much as he could.
He could feel Dick still worrying about whatever was causing Jason to panic, but Jason was pretty certain that as long as he didn’t have a full blown panic attack, Dick wouldn’t want to intrude. But that meant trying to prepare himself for the possibility the tests were going to come back positive.
He’d be lying if he said he’d never thought about having pups one day; he’d always been soft on kids and he didn’t think anything would change that. But there were several things he had to consider before anything else. The first was who he was, being a vigilante was hardly a good environment to raise a kid, and he’d be damned if he ever let his pup near any of it. So, going forward would most likely mean giving up Red Hood and either keeping the pup away from Dick and the family or convincing Nightwing of all people to give up the life. The second issue was he knew this was exactly what Roman had wanted when he locked them in that room together. Red Hood was becoming a problem, but Roman couldn’t kill him without bringing a vengeful hoard of bats down on his head, so he’d found a way to try and take Jason out of the game for at least a year. And Jason was reluctant to play into his hands, no matter what. But the biggest problem of all was his own insecurities. His parents had hardly been stable, and Bruce had tried, but he was hardly fit to raise kids with his night job. Add in Jason’s trauma and triggers and he wasn’t sure he’d be a good mom. He knew Dick would be an amazing dad, would most likely focus on the pup more than his night job, but Jason knew he would never be able to give up the pup for someone else to raise if he went through with it.
The shrill tones of the alarm caused both him and Roy to jump.
“Fuck.” Roy cursed as he fumbled to turn it off. He turned to look at Jason when Jason made no move to go and check what the tests said, before sighing and going to look himself.
Jason sat up and worked through one of the meditation techniques Bruce had taught him nearly a decade before in an attempt to stay calm. He knew from the look on Roy’s face what the result was as soon as the archer walked back in.
“They’re all positive.” Roy said carefully, like he fully expected Jason to explode.
“I don’t know what to do.” Jason admitted, feeling younger than he had in a very long time.
Roy let out a breath as he moved to sit on the edge of the coffee table again so they were face to face. “No one can tell you what to do with this one, Jay, it has to be your decision or you’ll end up hating yourself down the line. But I will say, don’t do anything rash. Take a few days, think everything through, because you have time before you need to make a decision. And whatever you choose, I’m here for you. No judgments or questions, I’ll back you on whatever you decide.”
Jason nodded, not knowing how to put into words how thankful he was for everything Roy had done for him since the moment they met after he came back. “I think- I think I need some time on my own to think everything through and make a decision.”
“Okay.” Roy nodded. “How about I give you a week? You can contact me before the week is up if you’ve made a decision, but if I don’t hear anything I’ll come find you this time next tuesday?”
“Okay.” Jason agreed, glad that Roy knew he meant he wanted some time completely off the grid to get his head straight. “I’ll leave in the morning.”
Roy nodded in agreement.
Jason kept his head down and the hood of his red hoodie up as he ducked into the clinic. While Jason Todd was still legally dead, he didn’t fancy anyone who could report back to the bats recognising him. It was easy to slip into the back corridor as the receptionist was preoccupied with a guy who looked too drunk to spell his own name. Leslie’s office was right by the back door; Jason had joked once as Robin that she had it set out that way so she’d be the one to hear the vigilantes when they inevitably came calling.
He took a deep breath before reaching up and rapping on the frosted glass pane three times.
“ It’s open !”
He pulled the door open and stepped inside before he could lose his nerve. Leslie was focused on some paperwork on her desk and didn’t look up to see who had walked in. Jason would normally have chastised her for not paying attention, but as it was, he was using all his focus to not throw up.
“If this is about the fact we’re running low on antibiotics, I’ve already put in the order and it’ll be here later today.” Leslie said, still focused on her papers.
“Not quite, Doc.” Jason said quietly.
Leslie whipped around to face him and her eyes immediately scanned him for injuries. “I’m not used to seeing you here while the sun’s up, Jason. What happened?”
“I’m pregnant.”
Leslie, to her credit, managed to reel in her shock exceptionally fast. “Okay, there are a few OB-GYN’s I trust that I can put you in contact with.”
Jason shook his head, that wasn’t what he was here for, at least not yet. “I-I haven’t made a decision about what to do yet.”
“That’s okay too.” Leslie shot him a warm smile. “We have plenty of leaflets for different options.”
“Would it be possible? I mean, with the Lazarus pit and everything that happened…” He trailed off.
Leslie’s smile dropped but the warmth didn’t leave her eyes. “I don’t know. But we can run some tests: check your hormone levels, run some bloods, external and internal ultrasound. I can tell you if it’s possible for your body to carry a pregnancy to term, but I’m not an OB-GYN, Jason, if you did want to move forward with the pregnancy, you would need an actual one.”
“Okay.” Jason nodded.
“I’m going to assume you’d like this to stay between us.” Leslie said.
“Please.” Jason looked up to see her nod in agreement and knew she wouldn’t tell anyone unless he gave her to go ahead.
“Well, let’s go through to the observation room and get you checked out.”
Jason had roughly six hours before Roy would come looking for him, and as he walked up the front drive to the manor, he wondered if it would have been better to wait it out and bring Roy with him. But he knew it was better to rip the bandaid off so he’d put on his strongest scent blockers and decided it was time to talk to Dick. He’d already checked Dick’s apartment, the gym he worked at and his favourite coffee shop. The feeling coming through the bond was somewhere between worry, apprehension and guilt. Jason was pretty sure that meant he was working on a difficult case, so the manor seemed the logical place he’d be.
He let himself in with the key Bruce had given him, shortly after they stopped screaming at each other every time they were in a room together, and then just never mentioned again. There were several pairs of shoes on the mat in the entrance way so he toed off his boots next to them and walked towards the stairs, intending to head to the study and then to the cave.
“Is someone dying that I’m not aware of?”
He spun around to find Tim standing in the hall that led to the kitchen with his hair all over the place and a cup of coffee clutched in his hands.
“Excuse me?” Jason raised an eyebrow.
“You’re here, apparently of your own free will, during the day, what else am I supposed to think?” Tim raised an eyebrow in retaliation.
Jason shook his head with a sigh. “I got something to discuss with Dickhead and he’s not at his apartment, so I assumed he’d be here.”
Tim scrunched his eyebrows together and frowned. “I thought you were currently living with Roy?”
Alarm bells started ringing in Jason’s head and the panic he’d been pushing back for a week started trying to claw its way to the surface. “Not this past week. What’s that got to do with me looking for Dick?”
Tim’s frown deepened. “I thought Roy would have called or messaged you?”
“I’ve been kind of off the grid for the last week. So, why don’t you tell me what the fuck is going on?” Jason said, trying to keep his cool.
“They’re gone.” Tim said. “There was an issue, I don’t know all the details, something to do with what the original Titans were doing on Tamaran when you…”
“When I died.” Jason finished when it became clear Tim wasn’t going to.
Tim coughed awkwardly. “Yeah, then. Kori called them all in, all the original Titans, the Justice League okayed it and they set off late last night after borrowing a ship from the Lantern Corps.”
Jason felt like someone had wrapped iron bands around his lungs and started shrinking them. “How long? How long are they going to be gone?”
“Jay? Are you okay? You look-”
“Tim, how long?” Jason choked out as he felt an answering swell of panic through the bond in response to his own.
“They don’t know for sure. Months, possibly a year.”
That wasn’t- No, Tim had to be joking.
But Jason knew he wasn’t. He couldn’t suppress the whine that tore out of his throat. Maybe he would have been able to deal with it if it was just one of them gone, but Dick and Roy being gone seemed to be what finally broke the dam holding back his panic.
“Jason? Jason!”
He barely registered the sound of something shattering as Tim jolted forward and grabbed his arms as his legs threatened to give out. He felt like he was underwater; his vision blurry and his ears full of cotton wool as he struggled to pull air into his lungs.
“Jason? Jay? Bruce! Bruce!” Tim sounded almost hysterical and Jason had a vague feeling that was probably a normal reaction to trying to keep your ‘maybe brother who happened to be much bigger than you’ standing as he had a panic attack for no apparent reason.
“Jason?” Another voice asked as a strong arm wrapped around his waist to keep him standing and pulled him into a solid chest.
He breathed in the omega scent of vanilla and woodsmoke that his brain registered as home . He whined and buried his face in the source of the scent as his breath came out as hitched sobs.
“Jay? What’s wrong?” Bruce asked as he ran a hand through Jason’s hair. “What happened?”
“I don’t- He asked where Dick was and I told him about the mission.” Tim said, his beta scent souring with panic.
Bruce gently pulled the collar of Jason’s hoodie away from his scent gland and pulled off his scent blocker. Jason didn’t try to stop him, he just wanted to feel safe and sleep so the panic would stop.
“Shit.” Tim whispered as the scent hit him.
“Okay, it’s going to be okay, Jay.” Bruce said as he swept Jason up into his arms like he was still a scrawny twelve year old and not a twenty-two year old who was almost as big as he was. “Tim, can you go and ask Alfred if he can meet me upstairs?”
Jason assumed Tim ran off to find Alfred as Bruce started walking up the stairs. He keened quietly and tried to bury his face further into Bruce’s neck.
“I know, sweetheart.” Bruce said softly as Jason felt a kiss being pressed against his forehead. “Just a few minutes and then you can sleep.”
Bruce shifted him slightly so he could open a door and then he laid Jason down on some soft blankets. Nest , Jason’s brain registered and he released one hand from the death grip he had on Bruce’s shirt to pull one of the blankets over him. He felt Bruce try and pull back.
“No, mama.” Jason felt Bruce go stiff. There’d been a few months, before the fight that resulted in Jason running off, where Jason had started to feel comfortable using the typical omega parental term. Jason had barely been able to think of Bruce as such since he came back, let alone say it. But something about being back in Bruce’s nest made him feel like a pup again and it slipped out before he could think about it.
“It’s okay, I’m not going anywhere.” Bruce said, his voice thick with emotion as he climbed into the nest and pulled Jason close.
Jason buried his face in Bruce’s chest and felt some of the panic start to ease as the feeling of safety washed over him. He tried to stay awake to relish in the feeling of Bruce stroking his hair while it lasted, but everything that had happened has drained him and he could do nothing to stop the exhaustion pulling him under.