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Nicholas was never one to accept when something goes wrong, he's too proud to admit it but this semester has been too hard for him, especially these last few weeks.
He deliberately ignores the voice in his head that says this semester got worse since his fight with Euijoo, he doesn't want to go back to the same thing, he's not such a loser, everything is fine, he's not freaking out over a silly fight with his best friend.
Stifling a sigh, Nicholas gets out of his bed. This is the fourth time this week he's woken up before his alarm goes off, knowing that he won't accomplish anything by tossing and turning he starts getting ready to go to college. The exam is at 8:00 am but he plans to go to the cafeteria to try and review some more.
It's still early when he leaves his dorm but he's sure he'll find people in the college cafeteria, it's for the best, he knows that if he stays in his dorm his head will take him back to that fucking fight over and over again and he's not willing to let his mind consume him, he has an important exam for god's sake.
When he gets to the place he orders the most loaded coffee and sits down to review his notes or tries to, it's been fifteen minutes and he can't stop thinking about Euijoo. Fighting with his best friend is nothing new, they have been friends for years, it's logical to have some disagreements but he and Euijoo have never gone this long without talking to each other.
The argument wasn't even that bad, Nicholas thinks, the real problem was how he used that argument to avoid Euijoo and the feelings that recently seemed to overflow from his heart.
He doesn't even remember when he started feeling different about his best friend, one moment he and Euijoo were laughing and the next Nicholas was thinking about how good it would feel to be kissed by him, to say he went crazy is an understatement. Nicholas stopped going to classes for three days, his friends kept asking if he was well, it wasn't normal that kind of absences from him but he evaded every question by assuring that he had been sick to his stomach. He was sure none of them believed him but he had more important matters to solve, like being in love with his best friend.
Months had passed from that moment, Nicholas had made peace with how he felt and although he thought he was confused at first, the fact that his heart would try to burst out of his chest with any interaction he had with Euijoo was enough to confirm that he was indeed, totally in love with him.
Nicholas was sure he didn't want to act on those feelings. He wasn't going to let his friendship with Euijoo be ruined so his plan had been to completely ignore his feelings until they were completely nonexistent but Nicholas had been so naive to believe it was going to be easy. Over time the confidence he had faded, it seemed that once he was aware of his feelings, they only grew more. With every moment he spent with his best friend he felt his world getting smaller. The hugs, the little touches, the looks, the laughs shared with Euijoo only made him want more and that was the problem, he couldn't get more.
Embarrassment settles in his chest at the thought of how he used such a petty argument to avoid Euijoo, Nicholas had been avoiding the places his friend frequented, ignoring his messages, he had even stopped eating with the guys and it had been two weeks of that. Now he thinks it's too late to go to Euijoo and offer him an apology, he knows his friend too well, he's most likely wondering why the fuck he's been avoiding him and his chest tightens at the thought that he has no idea how he'll answer that question.
He checks the time on his phone, there's an hour left until the exam and he hasn't managed to get a word left in his head. He sighs defeatedly, beginning to believe that he will not do as well on this exam as he had hoped. He tries to continue reading when someone takes the free seat next to him.
“Hey Nicho, it's pretty weird seeing you around so early, everything okay?” greets Yudai.
“Hi, hyung” he replies “All good, thanks. I came to study a bit” he tries to smile but he doubts he did make it because of the look on his friend's face. He knows this is another reason why he avoids his friends, he doesn't want to answer questions, he doesn't want to be questioned.
“From the look on your face it looks like it's not going as planned.”
“It's going better than I expected” he lies, he's not willing to accept that he's been thinking more about a certain someone and hasn't read a single word of his notes, that will only make his friend assume things Nicholas wasn't ready to explain.
“Dude you've spent more time looking at nothing than studying, you didn't even notice I've been watching you” says his friend with a sly smile on his face, Nicholas appreciates him a lot but he thinks it would be easy to erase that expression with a punch “I doubted a lot about if you were avoiding us, I assumed it was an exaggeration from Euijoo and told him you might be busy with exams but seeing you I think I'll have to start believing him.”
“I haven't been avoiding you guys” he lies again. “This exam is very important, you of all people know it Yudai, we studied together. I... I've been busy, you're right” adds Nicholas.
“Yes I know, it's not the first important exam we have but if it's the first time you behave like this, you worry me. Is there something you want to tell your hyung, Nicho? Are you okay?” Yudai's tone becomes softer, less amused.
“I'm fine, hyung” he says looking into his eyes but after a second he regrets doing so, Yudai looks at him with genuine concern, he feels a slight burning in his eyes, for this reason he had avoided his friends too he didn't want to worry them with his problems, the word 'fool' repeats over and over again in his head, in his selfishness he has not only managed to hurt Euijoo but also worry the boys, "I'm fine" he repeats, the words sounding less certain this time, he looks away.
“Honey, what's wrong?” he hears Yudai say, he feels his slowly come closer and put an arm around his shoulders, it's a slight gesture but Nicholas feels like he can breathe a little better. “Is it because of your argument with Euijoo? You know he adores you buddy. Yes, he might be a little angry but you are his world, he won't push you away if you approach him" the words his friend says settle in his chest “And if you are worried about us, don't be, we understand when you need time, we are your friends after all” that doesn't make him feel better, he doesn't deserve to have such good friends.
“I'm so sorry hyung, it wasn't my intention to get to this point...” he sighs “I will apologize to everyone, I'm very sorry” he says shyly and Nicholas thinks about Euijoo, he considers it, he knows Yudai is most likely right, for a slight moment he feels hope, until he remembers that the argument is not even the main reason why he is avoiding him now. “I'll apologize to Euijoo too... but not today.”
“Talk to me, I know there's something else, tell me what's wrong. Since I've known you I've never seen you so distant, you wouldn't be like this if there wasn't something else” says Yudai moving even closer to him, the grip on his shoulders getting tighter, clearly to comfort him.
“So, how?” asks Nicholas “I'm just worried about this exam” he adds although this time less convinced, he knows Yudai doesn't believe that.
“You seem very distant, I know you, something else is wrong with you and I want to know what it is. Trust me” his friend's tone is one of genuine concern and Nicholas feels the air catch in his chest.
“I ruined everything, I'm a fool” Nicholas says in a whisper, he thinks if Yudai hadn't been so close to him, he wouldn't have heard him “I ruined it, hyung” he feels a tear slip down his cheek which he quickly wipes away.
“What did you ruin, it's about the discussion? Relax, it's exam time, Euijoo will understand that you were stressed out, don't wor ....”
“It's not that” he interrupts the elder “It's not because of that, I.... I don't know how to say it... I think... I don't know... I...” his breath cuts off, more tears come out of his eyes, he can't get the words out but he knows that if there is one person he can trust it's Yudai "I... I like Euijoo" he says, he lifts his gaze from the table and directs it to his friend's face, his expression is one of astonishment, at another time it would have been funny, today it's not. Nicholas has no idea why but the next words come out of his mouth “I'm sorry” he says in a whisper, his friend's face changes to confusion.
"What?" he just confessed to his friend that he is in love with Euijoo but for him there is something more important "What the fuck Nicho, why are you apologizing?"
“I don't know” he replies, looking down “I feel like I failed him, you know. This isn't supposed to happen, he and I are friends, I wasn't supposed to...” his voice falters, the tears are uncontrollable, at another time Nicholas would be terrified to cry at the university, where there are too many people who can see him, right now Nicholas is so tired that he doesn't even think about that ‘I...’
“Stop it, I'm not going to listen anymore” he interrupts him “Look at me Nicho” his friend releases his grip on his shoulders and instead grabs both his hands squeezing them comfortingly “Come on Nicho, look at me” Yudai says seeking his gaze, when Nicholas dares to look him in the eyes, more tears slip down his cheeks "Don't cry Nicho, everything is going to be okay. Calm down" Yudai hugs him and for the first time in a long time Nicholas feels that the world is not falling at his feet, for the first time he knows that if this exam goes wrong his career will not end, for the first time he feels that falling in love with his best friend is not the end of the world.
After a few minutes, Nicholas separates from his friend “Sorry, I think I stained it” he points to his friend's shirt wet with his tears, Yudai hands him a napkin “Thank you” he adds while wiping his face.
“No problem” Yudai's hands return to his “I want you to understand that this is not a bad thing, it's totally normal that your feelings towards Euijoo have changed, don't let yourself believe that it's a bad thing.”
“It is, these things never end well. I don't want him to hate me because I didn't know how to handle things and I ended up falling in love with him, I'm terrified of losing his friendship”
“Is that why you walked away from him, he didn't reciprocate your feelings, did he say anything to you?”
“No, I didn't say anything to him and I don't plan to.”
“Now I understand but you have to know that it's not right to walk away from him like that, Euijoo isn't having a very good time” Nicholas feels a new pain settle in his chest “Don't make that face. I'm not saying it to make you feel bad, I just want you to see that he's suffering too, you have to work things out with him, Nicho. Besides, this world doesn't feel right without you and him being inseparable, so you have to work it out.”
A small laugh comes from Nicholas' chest “There's that smile” he added tenderly “Don't let your insecurities get the better of you, nothing in the world will make Euijoo hate you.”
“That's enough, stop treating me like a baby, I'm not Harua” he says feigning indignation.
“Well, you looked like a baby two minutes ago but I see that good things don't last forever.”
Another laugh comes out of him “I don't know what happened a few minutes ago I think you're imagining things that didn't happen” he adds playfully though he changes to seriousness when he says “I know I didn't do things right. My intention was never to hurt anyone, I know I was wrong and I promise I'll talk to him soon.”
“That I don't doubt, dude” Yudai looks over his shoulder “I-I...”
“Hey guys, how are you?”
Nicholas feels like he's been punched in the stomach, he was so distracted talking to his friend that he lost track of time, Fuma was there and that just meant that “Hey guys” Euijoo adds a little more reserved. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, that wasn't what he meant by 'soon' but apparently luck was not on his side. A hand is placed on his, Yudai subtly squeezes it to get him to react and not be quiet like a complete asshole.
“H-hello guys” he replies, watches how Fuma and Euijoo sit on the chairs in front of them, if before he thought he had bad luck now he didn't doubt it for a second when it is Euijoo who sits in front of him.
He takes one look at his best friend and fuck, Nicholas might be able to jump into his arms right about now, his heart beats so hard he thinks it's going to burst out of his chest, he hasn't seen his friend in two weeks but from the way he feels it could easily have been years.
Euijoo looks handsome as always. He's not wearing anything extraordinary but that green sweater makes his skin glow, his gaze goes to his face and Nicholas stifles a sigh, those eyes were so gorgeous and bright and huge and they weren't directed at him, those eyes were completely ignoring him and something about that feels wrong.
"What are you guys doing around here? Do you have an exam?" Fuma asks.
“Yes, in a few minutes. What about you guys?” the guy next to him answers. After that, a conversation ensues in which Nicholas doesn't participate. He can see his friends talking and he only focuses his attention on Euijoo, he notices how he participates in the conversation and alternates his gaze from Yudai to Fuma, he never directs a glance or a word to him, it's as if Nicholas is not at that table
'It's not right' he feels his eyes burning, if he thinks about it calmly it's what he deserves but even knowing it doesn't hurt any less.
'Look at me, look at me, look at me' but Euijoo doesn't.
He is so engrossed in his thoughts, he doesn't notice the two pairs of eyes that have their gaze on him “Excuse me?” he says belatedly.
“Nicholas, are you alright?” asks Fuma in a concerned manner, 'Not again, he can't worry one more friend'.
“Yes hyung, don't worry, everything is fine. I've been a little stressed lately but this is the last test so I think I'll be better” he reassures him.
“Well you certainly don't look ‘a little stressed’ Have you been sleeping well? Your eyes look a little puffy.”
And of course Nicholas had forgotten that little detail, he had cried a few minutes ago, he probably looked terrible “N-no, I think that...”
“What the fuck Nicholas, did you cry?” interrupts Euijoo.
His gaze went from Fuma to Euijoo in a second and fuck, his brain short-circuited, those eyes were looking at him after what seemed like an eternity “I-I...” Apparently he became a person incapable of connecting two words.
“What is it, Nicholas?” his friend insisted. No Nicho, no Nichole, no Yixiang, just Nicholas, and it was an exaggeration because everyone called him Nicholas but not Euijoo, never him. He had ruined everything, that was for sure. Nothing would ever be the same between the two of them again because of him and Nicholas would never forgive himself for it.
He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't notice how a tear fell down his cheek, he also didn't notice how his friend got up from his seat a second later to go to his side, he grabbed him by the shoulders turning him so that Nicholas was sitting in front of a standing Euijoo.
He feels a hand touch his cheek to gently wipe away the small tear, when he looks up to meet his friend's, his vision is blurred by the tears he tries to hold back "I-I'm s-sorry Juju, I'm sorry for everything, forgive me" and with that Nicholas buries his face in the curve of Euijoo's neck as he feels his friend's arms wrap around him tightly pulling him closer to his body.
“Sweetheart, tell me what's wrong?” the voice of Euijoo was a whisper in his ear “Talk to me Nicho, don't shut me out.”
“I ruined everything Juju, forgive me”.
"Don't cry love" reassures him "You're breaking my heart" says Euijoo, his tone so concerned that it makes Nicholas feel worse.
"Let's take you somewhere else" Euijoo exclaims after a few minutes, one hand runs down Nicholas' back and the other strokes his hair.
Nicholas is willing to accept it, he just wants to be by his Juju's side forever but "We have an important test Ju, actually not to ruin the moment for you guys but we have to leave soon or they won't let us in" interrupts Yudai.
It feels so good to be in Euijoo's arms that he had completely forgotten that they weren't alone, which by the way they were in the fucking college cafeteria and there were people watching him being a mess, with that in mind he pulls his face out of the comfortable place on Euijoo's neck and tries to move further away but the arms that have him wrapped around him don't allow him to do so.
"No" the guy exclaims without giving him a chance to move away, his tone desperate "One more second" he adds and places Nicholas in the same position they were in moments ago.
Nicholas' nose is so close to Euijoo's neck that he does the most logical thing he can think of and starts nuzzling his neck with his nose up and down, he feels a giggle come out of Euijoo's chest.
"You look like a kitten," he whispers in his ear.
"Shut up."
"I missed you Nicho."
'Fuck, I love him. I love Euijoo so much.'
"I missed you too Juju, I'm sorry."
"We need to talk."
"Yes, I know."
Nicholas feels much better after leaving the test, he doesn't know if he did well or not but he won't do himself any good if he keeps thinking about it.
Now that he has no exams due and no classes for the rest of the day, he decides to go to his dorm. He has no social battery for anyone.
He sighs as he remembers his encounter with Euijoo 'What the fuck happened to me?' he wonders to himself, he can't believe he cried in front of Euijoo. Not that it was a bad thing, it was just something Nicholas wasn't used to.
A shiver runs through his body, just thinking about it makes him feel ashamed but Nicholas isn't going to feel bad about it, things had happened that way and there is nothing he can do to change it. He reached his limit. These last two weeks had not been easy for him, seeing his best friend had been the straw that broke the camel's back.
Nicholas is sure that had it not happened in the cafeteria with Euijoo, it would have happened somewhere else. At worst, it is better that it happened in the presence of his best friend and not with someone else.
Arriving at his bedroom, Nicholas begins to undress, puts on a pair of pants and an oversized shirt and lies down on the bed. He lets out a sigh as he settles in between the pillows, after such an emotionally draining day to finally be in the comfort of his bedroom was heaven.
'I have to talk to Euijoo' he thinks, the best thing to do was to text his friend to meet up for the night, it was the right thing to do. He didn't know if he was going to be able to tell him the truth about his feelings, but that's a problem for his "future self". Right now he didn't want to think about it. Sooner or later he would have to talk to him, he wasn't going to make a mistake again, Euijoo didn't deserve this.
Nicholas wakes up when he hears knocking on his bedroom door, he hates being woken up in the middle of a nap so he decides to ignore whoever is looking for him.
He is about to fall asleep again until "Nicholas, are you there?"
Nicholas sits up in a second 'Euijoo?'
He quickly gets up to open the door, the sight makes his chest flutter, his Juju is there looking quite angry, Nicholas braces himself for what's coming "What's wrong, what are you doing here?"
"What am I doing here? I went looking for you in your classroom and Yudai told me you were gone, I thought I told you we needed to talk" his tone is harsh, his face completely serious.
"Well yes, I know. I told you that's what we would do, it's just that I th-" the sentence is half-finished when his friend interrupts him.
"What did you think, that it was a good idea to avoid me for another two weeks?" his tone allows no argument, Nicholas lowers his gaze, that was a low blow "I'm tired Nicholas, I've never seen you act like this before. If this is because of something I did, you have to tell me. I can't fix it unless you tell me what I did wrong" Euijoo's hand goes to his cheek, Nicholas wants to lean into the contact but doesn't allow it "Look at me Nicholas" his tone softer. And he does, he can see pain in Euijoo's eyes "I'm sorry, if I did something that hurt you, forgive me. Just... come back to me" he whispers, and puts his forehead together with Nicholas "You're my best friend for years, I can count on the fingers of my hand the times we've been without each other, I don't want this" their noses brush, their eyes don't leave each other's.
"I'm so sorry Euijoo" he feels Euijoo's arms around his waist, they pull him closer to his body, Nicholas doesn't understand what's going on but he's not dumb enough to end it. He places his hands on the guy's shoulders "Never think you've done something wrong. The one with the problem is me, not you. You are incapable of hurting me, so never say that. I'm so sorry Juju, it's all my fault."
"Just tell me what's wrong."
Nicholas finds himself with Euijoo's arms around his waist, their foreheads together and those big brown eyes look at him so fondly and he thinks he has been overreacting because there is no way this guy who is in front of him, holding him, looking at him as if Nicholas is the most precious person in this world can do him any harm, if there is someone who will understand it is Euijoo, always him.
"I love you" he says without thinking, Euijoo's expression is one of pure confusion "And no, I don't love you like one friend loves another, or yes, of course I do but this time I'm not telling you like a friend, I'm telling you like... like... well like love from one person to another" Nicholas' cheeks are flushed, his eyes drifting to look anywhere but at the guy inches away from him as he tries to finish his speech "I mean, I... What I mean is..." The courage he felt had left his body in a second and the ability to speak as well "I-I..."
"Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you look blushing?" interrupts Euijoo.
"N-no, I don't think so but that's not wh-.... Wait, what?" his eyes find Euijoo's and Nicholas gasps, there's a big smile on his friend's face and those eyes were looking at him with so much love, Nicholas doesn't think it's something he's imagining "J-juju... What's wrong? I-I don't understand" he says trying to break free from his best friend's grip, his hands go towards Euijoo's chest as he pushes him slightly "Let me go, Euijoo'' he feels the grip getting weaker and he takes the opportunity to get out of his best friend's arms, throwing him one last look as he walks into his room.
Euijoo follows him "Come on Nicho, did you think I didn't know?" exclaims the guy, when he turns around to face him, he has him a few steps away from him, the smile on his face is huge, Nicholas thinks he can wipe it off with one blow "Don't make that face, Nichole!"
"Well Euijoo, I don't know if you know but I was avoiding you for two weeks because I didn't want to ruin our friendship, I thought if I told you something, I was going to ruin everything. What the fuck does it mean that you knew? Y-you, since when did you know?" he asks unsurely, his tone brittle, uttering those words is difficult. That means Euijoo knew about his feelings long ago or that's what the guy's reaction makes him think, before his mind continues to work, his friend speaks up.
"I don't know what's going through your head right now but it's not what you're thinking" serenity dominates his tone.
"Isn't that what I'm thinking? Well I think what I'm thinking is quite correct. I want to know how long have you been laughing at me for my stupid feelings'' his face boiled with anger, damn, what a fool he was. His eyes meet his best friend's, Euijoo is angry too, he sees it in his face.
"What kind of person do you think I am, yeah, I know..."
"You're an idiot" Nicholas exclaims, completely exhaled, his hands push Euijoo's chest though he doesn't get his way, Euijoo just takes a step back.
"Let me explain."
"How could you be so cruel?" he tries to push him again but Euijoo is ready and grabs his wrists to prevent him.
"Stop it, you're going to hear what I have to say" he says as he uses the grip he has on Nicholas' wrists to pull him into his body, his arms go back around his waist "Stop fighting me, you're going to hurt yourself" he says as Nicholas uses his hands to push Euijoo's shoulders in an attempt to get out of his grip, he feels one of Euijoo's hands slide down his back, reaches the back of his neck and pushes him until he is inches away from the guy's mouth "You drive me crazy Nicholas, I swear to God" and with that Euijoo presses his lips together with Nicholas'.
The guy's lips move over his and Nicholas lets himself be carried away by the incredible sensation that runs through his body, he stops pushing Euijoo's shoulders to place his arms around his neck, the hand that Euijoo used to bring him closer to him is now tenderly gripping his hair while the other continues its firm grip on his waist. The kiss lingers until Nicholas feels like his lungs need air, he hardly pulls away from Euijoo but the guy only allows him to move a few inches away, their noses still brushing.
"What does this mean Euijoo?" he asks confused, he doesn't want to get his hopes up.
"It means I love you Nicho, I love you so much" he says as he brings their lips together again.
He doesn't know how long they spend kissing but when Nicholas is aware of his surroundings, Euijoo is sitting against the headboard of his bed and Nicholas is on top of his lap, Euijoo's hands run up and down his back while Nicholas' arms are still around the guy's neck.
They separate after what seems like an eternity and Nicholas places his head in the curve of Euijoo's neck, he feels like he's in heaven. Being kissed by Byun Euijoo is wonderful, the minutes pass with a rather comfortable silence between the two, Euijoo is the first to speak.
"I didn't know for sure about your feelings for me Nichole, sorry if I made you think I knew, I didn't know how to explain myself clearly" his voice is a whisper but Nicholas hears it clearly "The fact that you confessed made me very happy that's why I reacted that way, I'm sorry" he says tenderly.
"Why did it make you so happy, Juju?"
"I think because of what just happened between us you know perfectly well why."
Nicholas pulls his head out of Euijoo's neck, a loud laugh comes out of his chest when he sees how flushed his friend is "You're so silly, Juju" he says, his smile is so big that his cheeks hurt, Euijoo's eyes roam over his face.
"You're beautiful" Euijoo replies, stealing a gentle kiss from him but it's not enough for Nicholas so he steals another and another and another until again they have to break apart for lack of air.
"You said you didn't know for sure about my feelings but you suspected it right? What made you doubt?" Nicholas is curious, now he understands Euijoo's reaction when he confessed, he doesn't doubt him, he's just genuinely curious.
"You started behaving differently with me, Nicho, you may not have been aware of your own changes but you started more physical contact with me, little touches here or there, your hand in mine, more hugs, it was just something that crossed my mind but I thought 'Does he like me?' and then I felt like a fool, I couldn't believe I was thinking about it just because you had those actions with me so I knew something was going on with me too."
"You figured out what was wrong with you, Juju?" his hand tenderly caresses the guy's cheek.
"I liked you Nicho, so much that when you started having those little behaviors with me it made me the happiest person in the world. I didn't want to get my hopes up but I know you, I knew something was changing, I had hopes that it was for our good. When we had that silly argument I didn't worry, there have been worse, but when the next day you kept ignoring my messages I thought something had happened. By the way, I'm sorry I kept bothering you, I knew you were having a hard time with your studies but I kept doing it, it was rude of me" he says sincerely.
"Don't apologize" Nicholas replies, he knows the argument was mostly his fault "I may not have been having a good time but that doesn't justify me having to take it out on you. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you"
"I know honey, I know" a slight blush appears on Nicholas' cheeks, he doesn't think he'll get used to Euijoo calling him by those nicknames "I wanted you to take all the time you needed to be ready and talk to me. I know you like no one else, I just didn't want to assume your feelings so I kept waiting but when one day turned into two weeks I decided I couldn't wait any longer"
"I thought if I distanced myself from you for a while I'd get over it" he reveals, embarrassed.
"And how did that work out for you?" replies Euijoo to him with tenderness in his voice.
"Not as well as I thought" he replies "I'm an idiot, I'm sorry" he adds, burying his face in his hands.
"I swear to God if you ever apologize again, I'll run out of here and you'll never see me again" his voice is amused, his hands hold Nicholas' wrists away from his face "Look at me" and he does, his eyes meet Euijoo's and Nicholas has never felt so in love as he does now "Don't ever walk away from me like this again Nicho, I'm serious. Don't do this to us again, promise me."
"I promise" he replies in a second, his eyes drop from Euijoo's eyes to his mouth, he leans in to kiss him but a hand on his chest stops him
"I've never felt what I felt seeing you at the cafeteria, love, I missed you" Euijoo whispers against his lips "I'm so in love with you" he says bringing their lips together again.
As Euijoo watches Nicholas sleep in his arms, his back pressed against his chest, his arm above the guy's waist and the other arm serving as a pillow for Nicholas, being the big spoon, he thinks that many things won't change between them after all.
Euijoo thinks about how lucky he is, things turned out better than he thought they would, spending two weeks away from this guy hadn't been easy but if it was what it took for this outcome, they had been totally worth it.
'Beautiful' he repeats in his head 'I adore you' he thinks as he slides his hand from the guy's waist to start stroking his arm up and down, he stays a while longer on the scar on Nicholas' arm, then continues his way to his face where his hand gently caresses the guy's cheek which now stirs in the touch.
"Let me sleep, Juju" his voice in a whisper as he turns and buries his face in Euijoo's chest and his arm tightly grips his waist, Euijoo's arm that was serving as a pillow for Nicholas now caresses the guy's back.
"Don't you think you've slept enough, honey?" his tone amused.
"Shut up."
"Let me be your boyfriend," he asks in a whisper. Nicholas' head pops out of his chest in a second, his eyes wide in a clear expression of surprise "Don't look so surprised, love."
Nicholas instantly leans into his touch as Euijoo's hands hold his face "I love you more than anything Nicho, I don't want to spend a single day of my life without you in it" he continues "When we met I knew you were going to be in my life forever. Many things can happen in this life but losing you is not something I'm willing to live through, I want to be by your side as much as you allow me to be."
The eyes of the guy in front of him sparkle "I want you to be by my side always, Euijoo" he says, turning his face to leave a light kiss on one of the hands still holding his face "I love you so much"
"Come here" and with the grip he has on his face he pulls the guy until they are inches away "I adore you."
As he kisses his now boyfriend, Euijoo is sure that if some things change, the love he has for Nicholas and the love Nicholas has for him will not change at all.