Chapter Text
“Hey dude, you okay?” A boy with yellow hair tapped his shoulder, “you staring at her?” He pointed quietly.
God, he's always trying to get him laid. “Pretty hot, you should go talk to her.” Izuku shook his head and looked away.
“Uhm, thanks…electro-dick.”
The boy put an arm around his shoulder, “it's Denki, Denki Kaminari. Call me Denki.” The boy guided him to the cafeteria, “so, trying to get laid in highschool?”
Izuku shook him off, “the age of consent in UA is sixteen, and most of us are fifteen…and, bruh? Let's just go eat.” Denki had been talking with him all of yesterday. “Mineta said he'd save us a table.” He really just didn't want to have his friend trying to come in his life.
“Aweee, come on dude, she was totally checking you out yesterday.”
He sighed and shook his head, “you said that for every other person…stop projecting.” Kaminari took his arm back and put a hand over his heart.
“Projecting?”
“Just using me to get laid because no girl wants to touch electro-dick.”
Kaminara scoffed and shook his head, “I've fucked before.” Izuku smacked his forehead and awkwardly walked forward with the eyes permeating his neck. “Don't walk away.”
“You slept with that lesbian and came crying to me and my mom because she was more of a dude than you.” He remembered that boy coming back shivering to his mom.
“I didn't know she was into pegging, nearly had me!”
“Nah…you're definitely a part of the letter community.” Izuku laughed, “you should've seen how you looked when you came home and cried to momma that your anus had been rubbed.”
Denki groaned and they entered the cafeteria. “She was so hot, and you never told me that she wasn't into dudes!” He had to relinquish that the girl was in fact the hottest girl of their grade year.
Drop dead gorgeous, “she never tried hiding it, always kissing other women.”
“But that's what girls doooo, you know what I mean.” Kaminari punched his shoulder, “she was offering a two man, if you went she wouldn't have had time to pull that plastic murder weapon out.”
“I knew she was gay dude, we're friends.” She used to come over his house and lay all over his room before Denki and Mineta started coming over. “She texted me that night you ‘bagged’ her. Asking if you knew she was gay.”
His head twisted quickly, “you wouldn't dare!” Students looked at them and rolled their eyes annoyingly.
Izuku nodded happily, “I bought her the strap-on…pause…anyways, I couldn't blame you, if she wasn't gay and I wasn't raised by my mom…definitely would've been able to turn her straight.”
“Hey Izuku!” Mineta called waving, they turned that way and walked towards the table and sat down. By the window. “What took y'all so long.”
Kaminari groaned, “you remember Sakai?”
Mineta smiled, “Izuku's definitely ‘gay’ girlfriend that's definitely willing to turn straight for him? Who wouldn't, she's as hot if not hotter than Ashido and ‘nem.”
He said eating his food, “I got her in bed with me, foreplay and whatnot-”
“-he nearly got pegged…and she's not my girlfriend.” Mineta coughed out his rice and his nose curled, “by a purple eight inch dildo.” Then he looked at Izuku, “yep…he's definitely a bit fruity.”
His shaky finger pointed at Izuku, “did-”
He shook his head, “nah, I bought it as a joke. And Sakai’s not really into toys, she's more into the rea-” Izuku paused and his jaw dropped.
Then he looked at the other boys, “I think she did actually wanted me?” She was always in his bed cuddling with him, but she was dating women at the time so he didn't think much of it.
“I said the same thing.”
“You nearly got pegged Kaminari, definitely gay.” Mineta scooted from in front of the boy and went towards the end of the table. “How far did you two go?” He wiggled his eyebrows.
“We…we kissed.” This time Izuku groaned, “I thought that's just what she does.” He dropped his spoon and dropped his head on the table. “She said she wanted my kids.”
Again, Mineta choked, “but did you hit though?”
He shook his head, “I'll ask her now!” Izuku said and dug through his pocket for his phone, “she said she'll be stopping by today to celebrate us getting into UA!”
Right before he could click the contact icon, the boys snatched his phone. “Woah,” Mineta said, “are you completely sure?”
“Yeah, she's like a top tier babe. If you're wrong, you're going to ruin a friendship that could last your entire life.”
Mineta looked at Denki in agreement, “you two have known each other your entire life. Can't just up and say that I want to fuck you thinking she wants the same.” He never thought he'd be receiving relationship advice from a wannabe fuck boy and a midget dick.
“I guess.” They put his phone back down, “plus, I don't really think dating her would be a good idea. She's really sweet and kind, but not really my type?”
“Uh-huh…” Kaminari dragged out unnecessarily long, “you're into slightly short girls. Long green hair. Long tongue. Small tits. Soft looking thighs?”
“Nooo.” Mineta said softly and pointed his thumb behind him while covering his mouth, “her?” He whispered, the other two looked past him. To the same green haired girl he had been staring at earlier.
“That's the one!” Izuku smacked Denki in the back of his head when the boy yelled out. “Aye, fuck you!” And then a piece of bread had been stuffed into his mouth.
“Dude, you're literally getting stuff shoved in your mouth by another dude. You're definitely gay…if you are, if you swing that way, only slightly judging.”
“Shut up you idiots, and eat. We don't have all d-”
[Emergency!] His eyes pulsed as the sirens blared, no one moved for a second-[Emergency!] And then they did, and everyone started screaming.
“Should we go!” Mineta started standing, but seeing that Izuku hadn't moved, he said back down. “Guess not!” Kaminari nodded as people rushed past their table.
Slowly, the crowd got bigger, and then Kaminari roughly tapped Izuku and pointed past him. “Use your quirk!” He yelled in his ears, Izuku followed his hand.
There, a few tables down, a girl had been knocked down…and then she had been stepped on? Not once but a few times. Izuku sighed, he nodded to the others. They gave him a thumbs up and covered their ears.
He breathed in, staring at the girl, “stop.” The shockwave stunned people, those around him yelped and covered their tinting ears. Soon, he pushed through the crowd and made his way to the girl on the floor.
Her head was covered with her arms. He tapped her softly, [Emergency!] He sighed and snapped.
The speaker silenced, “hey, get up.” Her skin was starting to bruise and bleed in some places. “You got to get off the ground.” He pulled her arms away from her softly.
She blinked and looked up, and then looked around to the people staring up at her. “You're going to need to go to the nurse.” He pulled her up slowly, “can you walk?”
He could see her dirtied skirt and footprint covered legs. She shook her head softly, “hey Izuku, you need help?” Denki walked up behind him.
Izuku sighed and shook his head, “just go check for other people. I'll take her to the nurse.” He hooked an arm below her arm. “I'll meet y'all back in class, and make sure Mineta doesn't do anything stupid.”
Denki nodded seriously and then turned around with lightning jumping from his skin. He cupped his mouth, “look down around you and make sure you're not stepping on anyone!”
With the girl supporting herself against him, he pushed past the students and made his way into the already packed hallway.
“Thank you.” She said loud enough for him to hear her.
Izuku looked over, “I'll need you to put these on.” He pulled his head phones from around his neck and placed them on her ears.
Breathing in, he sighed, “stop.” And the same thing happened, people screeched and fell to the ground hearing the sound. Taking their blindness, he walked through the crowd carefully to make sure no one else was on the floor.
He only found a teen and helped them up, they weren't hurt that bad. A few scuff marks on their uniform.
He made it down the hall and turned to enter the nurse's office without knocking. “Who is it?” An elderly voice ramped from the back room.
“A student, a friend of mine, hurt herself pretty badly!” He slowly helped her to a seat, “she's pretty bruised.” He bent down in front of her, they started swelling.
“Izuku?” The lady called and made her way up, “why are you back?” She said, “oooh, pretty student, what happened?”
She gave him a few alcohol wipes, “stampede, you know how people get when they panic.” The girl closed her legs instantly, “I'm not going to peek up your skirt.”
And she opened her legs again slowly that time., “Look how good you got, gonna use your quirk?” Recovery Girl looked over his shoulder as he cleaned the bruises and small cuts.
“Not really, my throat is hurting and Kaminari isn't here to fuel me.”
“The boy with yellow hair and black stripe thing?”
“That's the one.” He used his teeth to open some gauze, “I can use it, but she shouldn't be hurting that bad so the nerves are agitated enough for me to numb the pain.”
“Ah, what about you girl? Is he doing a good job?”
Izuku didn't look up, “yes.” She looked away from the two of them and towards the wall. “Can't believe I got stomped on the first real day of school.”
He scoffed and lifted her leg to work on the back, “I guess.” He chuckled, “can't believe we had an emergency the first day of school.” She shivered when he slowly wiped the scratch on the back of her thigh.
“Couldn't even eat my lunch.” She grumbled and crossed her arms, “today sucks.”
He laughed and Recovery Girl walked back on the back. “Same, woke up and knew it was all gonna go to shit.” She nodded and laughed.
“Dude, I stubbed my pinky toe and stepped on my brother's Legos as soon as I got out of my bed. My fan unplugged itself last night so I woke up sweaty and anxious and I overslept.” He looked up at her in pity, “only to come to school and get stepped on.”
“Sounds pretty bad.” He tapped, “is this okay?” He looked back up at her and rubbed a part on her other leg, not a hurt as the other one.
“That's a birth mark…I think?” She shrugged her shoulders.
“Do you want me to as-”
She shook her head, “nope.” Her cheeks would puff when she'd smile. “I'd rather just believe that it's not going to kill me.”
She didn't seem to care for her skirt again as she moved her legs happily. “Ignorance is bliss, or so I heard.” Izuku cleaned around her bandages with a wipe and then took another one and wiped his hands.
Then stood up, “grandma, I'm finished!”
“Yeah yeah yeah, hurry back to class!”
The girl stood up beside him wobbly, “do you want me to walk you to class?” She grinned at him and crossed her arms.
“You just want to touch me again? Already felt up my skirt.” He looked confused, “but yeah.” She slipped her arm around his elbow. “You can walk me to class.”
She was shorter than him, around Kami’s height of only an inch shorter. He opened the door and they walked through. “So, how was your day other than the emergency?” She asked him as they walked past students.
“Pretty good, nothing much happened…which class are you in?” He doesn't even know why he thought he could walk her to class, seriously Izuku, you're not a gentleman.
“1-A, just down the hall.”
His eyes widened, “me too.” She looked up at him smiling and nodded, “...you already knew that?” He blushed embarrassingly.
“You and your duo of perverts are pretty loud…and I don't blame you for not knowing me. I don't really talk much, don't have any friends.”
“You have one now.”
“Whatever dude, let's go before Aizawa-Sensei gets to notice we're not here.” They walked quietly and came across their class soon. He opened it and she walked in.
Their eyes scanned the class, the students were talking and the teacher wasn't here. “Hey.” She turned around at him.
They already dropped arms when they opened her door. “Never learned your name.” She pushed her hair behind her ear, “I'm Jirou Kyouka, by the way.”
She leaned softly on the heels of her feet, “Izuku Midoriya, and it was nice to meet you.” He smiled and she nodded and made her way to a seat.
Back of the class beside some man with six or eight arms? Immediately after, Izuku sat down in his seat. Behind Mineta and beside Kaminari.
Said blond placed their hand on his shoulder, then lightning filled his veins. Izuku sighed, “thanks.” Mineta turned around and.our his phone on his table.
“Who was that?” Kaminari asked, “she's way too cute.” The girl might not have had the largest chest or widest thighs, but she was hot enough to get Izuku's heart racing.
That's even after he saw her dark purple underwear two feet from his face. “That's Jirou…and I agree,” he sighed blissfully, “she is very hot…and talk low…her hearing’s pretty good.”
“She's perfectly petite.” Mineta said softly, “she might not be that developed, but it's in the charm.” He shoved his thumb out and nodded, “you have attracted an S-tier.”
Izuku rolled his eyes and breathed out, “she's pretty funny and doesn't talk loud.”
Denki groaned, “this is bull. First Sakai and now her, what do you have that I don't?” He muttered and slid back in his seat. “I'm not ugly-”
“Cap.” Someone said through a cough.
“Fuck you Mineta…and I'm handsome…got a pretty cool quirk and I work out.”
“Excuse me.” A girl’s voice filled their ears, they all looked over surprised. To the girl sitting in front of Denki, Mina Ashido. “Are y'all talking about girls?”
Denki rolled his his eyes and sat up, “if you wanted to get laid…which one of use would you fuck? Him,” he pointed at the green haired boy, “or me?”
“You skipped me?”
Mina looked between the two of them, “your super hot.” She said to Izuku, “but you might be weird…” she turned around to face him. “What type of women do you like?”
Mineta groaned, “here we go again.”
“Easy.” He sat up and locked in, “I like girls, big girls, itty-bitty-”
“He actually made it into a song.” Mineta couldn't believe it…Izuku was the weirdest of them all.
“-girls, pretty kitty girls, really witty girls, singing dity girls. I like the leggy girls, with the nice thighs,” Jirou had amazing thigjs, the girl knew that and blushed. “I like a good chest, no matter that size.” He said calmly.
“Stop.” Mina rubbed her cheeks and then her eyes, “there's no way you made a song out of that.” She cringed and shook her head, dropping her hands back on the back of her chair, she looked at Denki, “you let him make that?”
She said disgustingly, now, there were a lot.of things Izuku could take. But, disrespect wasn't on that list yet. Mineta noticed the way his smile dropped.
“It's terri-”
“Amazing, a wonderful piece of literature.” Denki and Mineta said at the same time. “That even God himself could not hope to fathom.” T
They looked as his smile returned.
Good…no more sounds.
He grinned at the girl who huffed and turned around, “the fuck is her problem?” Kaminari sighed again, she could hear with how loud he was. “People just can't mind their own damn business.”
Mineta and Denki's looked at each other and shrugged their shoulders. “Dude…but that song…do you sorta got the lyrics?” Mineta wiggled his eyebrows.
Izuku plopped his phone in his hand. “Check my notes, it's all there. Send it to yourself.”
“What, me too, send it to me Miineta.” The boy looked down at his phone and searched through his messages and saw the lyrics pop up.
“Ass or tits.” Mineta asked putting his phone back on the table.
Izuku smirked, “ass cannot be passed.” He nodded softly and turned to the left. He tapped on the red haired boy’s shoulder, “excuse me?”
“Huh?”
“Ass or tits?”
The boy looked slowly, and then his hair spiked up, “definitely persona-”
“Boooo.” They said simultaneously, “get outta here!” They booed again.
“Lame, I expected better from a fellow comrade.” Mineta shook his head dripping with fake tears. “He was taken by the brain rot.”
Kaminari wiped his face, “another brother lost into femininity. A shame, a damn shame.”
“Wait a minute guys…personality isn't so bad.” The boy looked at him disgusted, “if her ass is decent and her tits are superb, then maybe her personality is considered.” They all chuckled. “But seriously, a hot babe that’s a piece of shit is a huge no…not into thst toxic shit…you know?”
Mineta shook his head, “getting gagged with my hands tied, that's my heaven.” He rubbed his hands together. “Thinking about it now.-
Denki and Izuku looked at him disgusted, “you're definitely the type of man to enjoy getting pegged.” Kaminari said.
“That's rich coming from the only man here who had a dildo rubbed on their butt.” Denki flicked him off and Izuku laughed. “By the way, where is he anyways?” Mineta said, looking around. “Aizawa Sensei said well be training today.”
“Don't know, let's just wait.”
“Stockings, skirts, shorts, or tights?” Kaminari asked them before they could fall into the silence.
Izuku grinned, “it depends. Is she hefty?” Denki nodded, “then I'd definitely choose some tights. Nice and gray, or black and soft. Gosh, women are amazing.”
They all nodded quietly, “definitely.” Mineta sighed softly, “they're the best.”
“It goes women, cats, dogs, and then men.”
“Ha, definitely not, Men, Women! cats, and then dogs.”
“You two are so wrong, it goes women, dogs, cats, and then men.” Mineta ended happily, “wait…you're gay!” He pointed at Izuku who looked at the two of them confused. “You put men before women.”
Kaminari nodded, “definitely heard the same thing, if you swing that way, get off the swing.” He cackled and smacked the table.
Mineta fist bumped each other, “literally!” They gawked, Izuku rolled his eyes.
“Says green bean dick and dildo taker,” they stopped laughing suddenly and frowned. “You two fucks don't even know which is which.” He raised his fingers and flipped them off, “shit funny now huh?!” He laughed, “dickless losers–”
“Midoriya!” His eyes widened and the boy froze as he looked up towards the front of the class. Aizawa was staring.
Izuku slowly lowered his fingers, “when did you get here?” He scratched the back of his head.
“Long enough.”
“They als–”
“I know.”
Mineta and Denki's mouth dropped, “frankly, he was the only one who cussed—”
“Excuse me sir,” the three boys groaned, the personalitu redhead had to speak the fuck up. “I'd like to point out that they were all equally cussing.” Aizawa nodded.
“Oi,” Denki stood up beside and flicked off Kirishima. “Suck my magnum dong!” He waved his fingers, Mineta smacked.his forehead down on the table.
Izuku punched Denki in the throa, “ah,” he wheezed. Kaminari punched him back in the ribs. “Fuck you.”
“Ugh,” Aizawa sighed, “get the fuck out of my class.” Denki dragged him by his arm past the desk.
He placed a paper down on Mina’s desk, “you are so attractive.” He winked, “call me.” They were kicked out the room and the door slammed. Mina looked down at the paper.
It was his number.
She rolled her eyes and set it in her bag? Maybe she will? “Now that those disruptors are out,” Mineta fixed his tie, “we can start learning.”
“Minoru Mineta.”
The boy stood up and walked out, “my dick’s bigger than yours.” Aizawa slammed the door on the short boy. “I fucked your mo–!” He was gagged, “if you don't let me open this door Denki, I'm fucking your wife!”
Aizawa kicked the door and the kids scrambled off, “dude.” Jiro said over the silence. Momo looked back and nodded.
“Can you kick them out?”
Aizawa's teeth grit roughly, “oh trust me,” he kicked his desk, “I already tried…I already…tried.” Tears leaked from his dead eyes, “were stuck with those fuck ups.”
“I can kill them.”
They all looked towards Bakugo who was laying back in his chair, “nevermind.” He mumbled and closed his eyes.
“Did he actually give you his number?” Kirishima whispered. Mina smiled and nodded, he frowned. “You're not actually gonna call him?”
“Did he get on his knees and beg?”
His eyes crinkled and she shook her head, “then hell the fuck na—”
“Ashido!” Aizawa’s chalk cracked, “if you continue that fucking sentence, so help me God!” His hair floated and his nails scratched against the black board loudly. “Talk about that shit outside of my class!”