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Jiyan returned to Knell Bell square. He hadn’t planned on it, but after his meeting with Wenshu to plan another Riverside game, he suddenly found himself back at Knell Bell square in the field of Emortia flowers he had grown.
It was only after sitting in the field of flowers for a few moments did he realize something, he was tired. And not in the way a simple good days rest could fix, no it was an exhaustion steeped deep in his muscles all the way down to the very core of his bones. He was tired. He wanted all of this to end, he wanted his men to be able to return home to their loved ones, he didn’t want to continue ordering his men to their death, but he knew that was nothing more than wishful thinking. For as long as the Tacet discords exist, they would continue fighting and they would continue dying.
“I can tell you’re thinking too much for your own good, Jiyan.”
Jiyan jumped slightly at the sound of an all too familiar voice. He turned his head to find Mortefi walking towards him.
“What are you doing so late at night, you should rest. It’s not often you get the chance to properly do so.” Mortefi scolded him in the way he did towards the children that would frequently visit him looking for candy or toys. Gentle, his voice soft and holding no real vexation towards him.
“Shouldn’t I be saying the same thing to you? You don’t get much sleep yourself.” Jiyan replied, turning back to look at the Emortia flowers in front of him.
“Hmm”, Mortefi stayed silent, looking the flowers as well. After a while of standing in silence he slowly sat down next to Jiyan.
“These are the flowers you asked the Academy to breed, right?” Mortefi asked after a few moments.
“Yes.”
“…May I ask the reason as to why you decided to?” Mortefi’a voice was low and quiet, giving him room to reject answering the question if he wished to do so. But Jiyan didn’t want to, Mortefi was someone he has known for quite some time now, someone he placed great trust in. Jiyan suspected there was something more to that, but he had been too afraid to put a name to that feeling. He wasn’t quite sure if was ready to unpack all that just yet.
Jiyan sighed before answering, “Before I became the general my mother gave a pill case shaped as a gourd, she was worried that my time as a general would make me forget my role a healer, and the importance of life…” Jiyan quieted down, trying to figure what to say and how to say it. During this time Mortefi stays quiet, choosing to let Jiyan gather his thoughts first.
“But if anything, I feel it has only made me further realize just how precious life can be, how easily it can be created and then taken away at any moment.” Jiyan’s voice shakes slightly, and if Mortefi notices, he doesn’t comment. Jiyan’s grateful for that. As a general of war he should never let his emotions get the better of him, so Jiyan’s not sure if he would be able to handle someone pointing out that his resolve is slowly breaking.
“I wanted these flowers made to honor not just their death, but also their life. The life they sacrificed so that the people of Jinzhou can live another day, and to pave the path towards peace.”
Mortefi stays silent a little longer letting the information sink in before responding, “Well… you shouldn’t stay out too late, like I said before it’s not often you get the chance to properly rest.” Mortefi stands up before holding his hand out to Jiyan.
“So come on, let’s get you back home so you can sleep for once.”
Mortefi didn’t explicitly say it, but Jiyan knew what he meant. ‘I’ll be here for you if need it, so don’t hesitate to come to me if ever want to talk.’
Jiyan smiled softly, talking Mortefi’s hand as he replies.
“Thank you, Mortefi.”