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Anakin’s body aches, sore from a long, extended training session. All Anakin wants now is to collapse on the couch with his Master. Maybe he can convince Obi-Wan into making him a cup of tea or something. He makes it back to the apartment without collapsing from exhaustion, thankfully, and immediately seeks out Obi-Wan’s Force presence.
He's curled up in an armchair, looking comfortable, and Anakin hopes that after a shower he'll have a chance at joining him. He sneaks up behind him as he makes his way towards the refresher, glancing at the datapad in his lap, no doubt holding a mission report or something of the like.
He barely spares it a glance, only to freeze and do a double take: That's no mission report.
Obi-Wan’s datapad is opened to a blog on one of the holo sites that Anakin is intimately familiar with. What’s worse is which holo blog Obi-Wan has his datapad opened to exactly.
Obi-Wan-Kenobis-Babygirl
No. No. This is not happening. This was never supposed to happen.
And then, what’s worse is that Obi-Wan must sense his presence because he turns around. "Ah, Anakin, you’re back. How was training?"
"Fine," he squeaks out, hoping the flush in his cheeks can be explained by the exercise instead of pure, raw embarrassment. This cannot be happening. "What, um...What'chya lookin' at?" he asks, trying to sound casual. It can't be what he thinks it is. It can't be the blog Anakin made to publicly appreciate (read: be horny over) his former Master.
Obi-Wan hums. "Cody showed me this website," he says, actually sounding casual as if Anakin’s whole world wasn’t crumbling around him. "It seems that I have quite the admirer."
He does, but Obi-Wan was never supposed to know. He was never supposed to see Anakin’s blog.
"Cody showed it to you?" he asks, confused without having to pretend to be. "Why would he....how did he...." He can't put words together. The situation has left him too flustered, too at a loss.
Obi-Wan strokes his chin, and Anakin tries not to think about how characteristic the action is (something he's vented about on said blog several times) or how weird and fluttery it makes him feel. "Cody says I might be in danger," he admits frankly.
"In danger!?" Anakin repeats. Oh stars, were his horny blog posts really that much of a threat to Obi-Wan’s safety? And, Force, how many of the horny posts did Obi-Wan read? Anakin clears his throat. "What—ah, what makes Cody think that?"
"Well, it’s mostly this picture." Obi-Wan tilts the datapad so Anakin can see it. "Taken of me while vulnerable and asleep in the Temple. The fact is that anyone who could have taken that picture is a very large threat to security."
Anakin's brain blanks. Oh no. Oh, Force. Anakin took that picture. Anakin takes most of the photos that end up on here, actually, and now that fact is becoming a lot more obvious as someone, and by someone he means Obi-Wan himself is seeing those pictures and realizing that only someone who was within like two feet of him (which Anakin often is) could take them.
"T-that is a concern," Anakin agrees, brain running on autopilot.
"Unfortunately, after having gone through the entire holo blog—" the entire blog? Obi-Wan read the entire blog!? Anakin thinks hysterically. He’s going to die. Someone needs to put him out of his misery. "—this individual has not given out much personal information. Only their, ah, thoughts on me."
"What's the plan, then?" Anakin asks faintly. He knows all too well what kinds of thoughts are on that blog (he wrote them, after all, including way too many fantasies about Obi-Wan's hands being places he shouldn't want them), and while part of him wants Obi-Wan to recount them for him to jerk off to later, the rest of him would die of embarrassment.
"We’re going to monitor the blog for a few days," Obi-Wan says, his face unreadable when he glances at Anakin. "We need to see if they keep posting and how much of a threat this blog poses."
Oh. Oh Force. Anakin might be sick. Obi-Wan is going to be monitoring his posts. Like he’s a child, visiting websites he’s not supposed to. Which he sort of is, but that’s not the point. The point is that Obi-Wan will be watching the blog and Anakin will have to keep posting because Obi-Wan is smart and he’ll get suspicious if the posts stop right after he’s interrogated Anakin about it.
But that means...that means he has to have thoughts about Obi-Wan knowing Obi-Wan is going to see them.
Which, okay. It's not that hard to have horny thoughts about Obi-Wan. In fact, it's even harder not to. But it's different. Very, very different knowing Obi-Wan (and possibly Commander Cody, kriff) will be seeing them—no, no, watching for them.
And yet he does it, because he has to, in order to not arouse suspicion.
He tries not to think too hard as he loads up his blog page later that evening. Just one post tonight. That’s all. That’ll keep them from suspecting Anakin.
Anakin scans through his notifications for comments. Maybe he can use one of them to his advantage. Of course, he doesn’t love that other people have similar thoughts about Obi-Wan, but every time he sees another person comment, Anakin gets to think about the fact that he gets to see Obi-Wan in person every single day. So, scrolling through the comments it is for now.
Someone is discussing his lightsaber form—and, yeah. Anakin could talk about it all day. His Master is so competent; watching him wield a lightsaber is art. It's a fight not to get distracted when they spar. He specifically chooses a photo where his hair is falling into his face because Anakin is a weak man and watching Obi-Wan, always so carefully put together, get even slightly disheveled is like a drug to him.
Anakin attaches the photo to a post and types up a quick caption.
Obi-Wan disheveled after a lightsaber fight will never fail to make me flustered. Between his perfect form and the way his hair falls loose...Makes me wonder if I could see his perfect form and disheveled hair somewhere else.
It’s not exactly how he’d write his normal captions but he writes a different one and deletes it at least three times, so this will have to be good enough.
Besides, he can prove (not that anyone will ask) that he is equally desperate for Obi-Wan Kenobi, if not more so, than when he made every other post on this blog. Really, he's always desperate for him. It's a terminal illness, and Anakin can't bring himself to care.
After that, he closes all of the tabs, careful to make sure no one could ever stumble upon something he doesn't want them seeing, and finally takes that glorious shower.
After his…long shower, Anakin wraps himself in nightclothes and collapses into bed. He ignores the fact that he’s going to have to keep making posts on his blog.
He can’t ignore it forever, though, and he should really post something before meeting Obi-Wan in the morning. Or, better yet, he should schedule a post for when he and Obi-Wan are together so that Obi-Wan has absolutely no reason to suspect him.
He schedules one for the morning, but that means he one: has to get out of bed at a reasonable hour, and two: look Obi-Wan in the eye after posting that about him, knowing he'll see it. But needs must, so that's what he does.
The man looks....troubled when Anakin stumbles upon him sitting at the counter as he makes his way into the kitchen way too early in the morning, searching for caf.
"Something bothering you?" he asks, his voice rough with sleep, before he notices the datapad in the man's hands. On second thought, Anakin thinks he'll know exactly what's going on in his head. He regrets asking.
Obi-Wan pauses for a long moment. "Just… more posts on that blog I told you about last night," he says eventually.
"What troubles you about it so much, Master?" Anakin asks hesitantly. He should probably just shut down this conversation but he’s curious.
"It's just...odd. Not something I'd ever thought about," he says with a shrug. Right, because Obi-Wan is the perfect Jedi, and he would never have impure thoughts. Not like Anakin, who has them on the daily. "My hair, really?"
"… You do have very nice hair," Anakin says. Hopefully, that makes it sound like Anakin isn’t the one making the posts. Although how is releasing his thoughts onto the HoloNet any different than releasing them into the Force?
Really, if anything, Obi-Wan should be appreciative. He's letting go of things, releasing them! Even if it means telling them to an audience of one...or two...hundred.....thousand people.
"Ah, thank you," Obi-Wan says, clearly flustered. "Perhaps I should consider wearing it ungelled more often."
"No, no, that would ruin it. Seeing it fall out of the gel is part of the appeal, I believe," he tacks on in what feels like a futile attempt to not give himself entirely away.
Obi-Wan stares at Anakin for a long moment. Anakin tries his best not to squirm under his Master’s gaze. Eventually, Obi-Wan must take pity on him because he says, "Very well," with a small shrug-like movement.
"You’re not…I mean it doesn’t make you uncomfortable, does it? That people are saying all these things about you?" Anakin asks, the thought suddenly occurring to him. Anakin will have to stop immediately if Obi-Wan is horrified by the attention.
Even if he gives himself away, he can't keep doing it if Obi-Wan is displeased. He wouldn't want to do anything that would upset him.
"No, no," Obi-Wan says quickly. His cheeks are pink. "It doesn't bother me, perse. I really have no feelings about it. They don't know me, after all—I'm just a public figure, The Negotiator, they don't see me as a real being so much as a celebrity. None of these people would want me in real life, so it doesn't really matter."
Well, Obi-Wan is very wrong about that. Not that Anakin is going to tell him. Obi-Wan can keep believing what he believes.
"That…makes sense," Anakin says, downing his second cup of caf. Thankfully, or maybe not, Obi-Wan’s datapad chimes with a notification.
"Ah, they’ve posted again." Maybe Anakin should’ve scheduled it for a little bit later in the morning. He hides a grimace in his empty cup.
"That's good, right? For your monitoring?" Why is he still talking? Shut up shut up shut up—
Obi-Wan shrugs. "We've not really gained any new insights. None of the photos they've used have been personal, or at least not as egregiously."
Anakin hides a wince. "That’s a good thing, too, right? It means they only got in once."
"Once is already too many times, Anakin. Force, they could’ve done anything while we were asleep," Obi-Wan says softly, lost deep in thought.
Anakin goes for a casual shrug. "Then we're lucky they didn't," he says, voice coming out calm and steady, because. Well. Anakin is aware that there's no actual threat here, unlike Obi-Wan. It's just him.
Obi-Wan sighs, sounding frustrated. "Luck isn't good enough. Someone broke into our place, Anakin, and they could have done anything! What if they had done something to you? All because they're obsessed with me, with the way I look, and I was none the wiser?" He seems...guilty, almost, over what imaginary thing this fake stalker might have done to Anakin, as though it's his fault people find him attractive.
"Why would they have done anything to me when they wanted you?" Anakin asks. Which probably isn’t the right thing to say. Anakin might be obsessed with Obi-Wan but he would never want to cause harm to his master, much less while he’s asleep.
"We don’t know what intentions they had, Anakin. We need to be more careful from now on," Obi-Wan responds.
"Sleep with both eyes open, got it," he jokes. He already essentially sleeps with one eye open, as fitful as it is (which is how he got that picture of Obi-Wan in the first place).
Obi-Wan shakes his head ruefully. "Shall we sleep in shifts, the way we do on missions?"
"We could camp out in the living room," he jokes back, pretending the idea of sleeping that close to Obi-Wan doesn't make him want.
Obi-Wan laughs and Anakin very nearly takes a picture of that. Force, Obi-Wan is beautiful when he laughs. He’ll have to make a post about that later. He can probably find an image of Obi-Wan laughing somewhere.
"I’m afraid my back would protest that." Obi-Wan’s eyes are sparkling a little, and Anakin might just die on the spot.
"We could drag a mattress out!" he protests, and the joking is becoming a little too real because now Anakin is starting to want this and thinking of ways to make it happen. He can't look away from Obi-Wan, feeling a little lost in him, at this moment, and he's bitterly reminded that he's the only one who feels that way, the only one out of the two that can't look away from the man sitting across from them. But that's alright because Obi-Wan is giving him that smile he reserves just for him, and that's something so precious he won't let anything ruin his enjoyment of it.
Obi-Wan shakes his head fondly, eyes drifting back down to his datapad. His cheeks flush a little pink and a small frown creases his brows. Anakin had to stop himself from reaching out to touch his face and smooth out his frown. Maybe he shouldn’t have made this last post…quite so explicit. He sort of forgot that Obi-Wan would be reading them and got a little carried away. Still, he can’t stop his curiosity.
"What does the new post say?" he asks, probably because he has a death wish of some kind.
"It's, uhm. Rather..." Obi-Wan clears his throat. He can't seem to tear his eyes away, which Anakin gets a secretive little thrill about. Obi-Wan is entranced by his words.
"Rather....?" he prompts like he's totally innocent and didn't write the post analyzing the bulge in Obi-Wan's leggings and discussing how fit he would be to totally destroy Anakin's hole (or, y'know, the mysterious author of the blog's).
"Speculative," he says faintly.
"Speculative?" Anakin huffs a small laugh. "What does that mean?"
Obi-Wan crosses his arms lightly over his chest. Then draws one out to wave dismissively. "Oh, you know."
"I really don’t, c’mon, Obi-Wan, what does it say?" Anakin asks, and now he needs Obi-Wan to say it out loud. He’s dug himself in too deep now.
"Nothing you should concern yourself with," he says firmly. He shuts off the datapad and tucks it into his robes, unwittingly hiding the thing Anakin himself goes to great lengths to conceal.
"Oh c'mon, Master," Anakin teases. "I thought we didn't keep secrets from each other?" He's pushing, and he knows he is, but he wouldn't be Anakin if he didn't push. Backing off now would seem suspicious, Obi-Wan had to expect that their 'argument' was only half over.
"We don’t, but I would hardly call this a secret given that a hundred other people have already seen it. You, Padawan, do not need to be one of those," Obi-Wan says in that tone he only uses for Anakin. Somewhere between friendly and scolding.
"I’m not a youngling anymore!" Anakin protests. "Just tell me."
"It has nothing to do with you being a youngling, Anakin," he says, which both mollifies and annoys Anakin. After all, he said it in a way that carefully implies that Anakin is one. "I highly doubt that most friends discuss...things like this with each other." And he's probably right, but Anakin wishes he did anyway.
"But it’s to keep you safe," Anakin says with a small frown. "How can I keep you safe if I don’t have all of the information?"
"I sincerely doubt this particular information would aid you in keeping me safe, Anakin."
Anakin huffs, but he knows when to leave it alone, so he just pours himself another cup of caf and pouts into it. "I like knowing everything I can about you, Master," he admits, probably far too honestly (especially given the knowledge they're discussing).
Obi-Wan stares at Anakin again. He seems to be doing that more often. "You don’t even know if the information on this blog is accurate," Obi-Wan says slowly.
"Yeah, 'cause you won't tell me," Anakin says, effortlessly going back to teasing. Obi-Wan just sighs.
"Promise me you won't go looking it up on your own time?" Obi-Wan asks seriously. Anakin, unfortunately, as the owner of the blog, can't promise that.
"What's the point if it's not accurate?" he deflects.
"Because even if it is not accurate, I do not want you thinking of me any differently," Obi-Wan says as if that could ever be a real concern.
"I could never! I don’t care what some—strangers are saying about you on the HoloNet! It doesn’t matter to me," Anakin says firmly, probably a little too passionately.
Obi-Wan sighs. "Just stay off the website, Anakin," he says firmly, pulling on his cloak and turning to leave. "Now, I've got to go update Cody on a concern about the security," he says, a clear goodbye.
"How is this a concern?!" Anakin shouts at his retreating back.
If Anakin weren’t listening so closely he would miss Obi-Wan’s next words, but he is listening carefully and so he hears it when Obi-Wan mutters, "Because those damn posts are getting too accurate."
What. What. What!?
Anakin is suddenly glad that Obi-Wan is out of the room because he gets hard so fast he gets dizzy. The post is accurate? He's......he actually.....
He’s apparently huge.
Anakin had in no unspecific terms made clear that he figured Obi-Wan would be absolutely hung. And did Obi-Wan just confirm it? Oh Force. Anakin needs to take a cold shower or jerk off now or he might explode or something.
Thank Force the man himself is gone and will be, presumably, for a while, because Anakin needs to get off to fantasies of Obi-Wan railing him with his, apparently, massive dick right now.
He locks himself in his room, spitting in his hand and pulling out his already hard cock without delay. He coats two of the fingers of his other hand in spit and reaches behind himself. He doesn't have time to get out proper slick, he needs to get off right now.
He wonders if he would feel small underneath Obi-Wan's big hands, if he would even be able to breathe after he pushed in, or if he would be too big for even his lungs to draw air. From all of the evidence he's gathered (number one being the fact that Obi-Wan confirmed it out loud), he guesses the latter.
He pushes two fingers into himself at once. He'll regret it later when he's sore and has to fight off wincing during training, but it's fine. It's worth it. Especially if it simulates how sore he'd be if Obi-Wan had his way with Anakin. Anakin wishes he could have the real deal, but this will have to do for now.
He wonders how many fingers he'd have to slip into himself to compare to Obi-Wan, then pushes the thought away when it makes him so flushed with arousal he can't think straight. Instead, he works on moving his fingers inside of himself, stretching so he can prepare to take more (and more and more and more, even if what he wants will never actually come).
Anakin manages to get up to three before he comes over his stomach, a fantasy of Obi-Wan pushing him down onto the bed, Anakin split by his massive cock, at the forefront of his mind. Anakin prays to every deity out there that his mental shields held during all of that.
He cleans himself off, takes a power nap despite the three cups of caf he's had, and has an actual meal to fuel himself to make another post. This time, like he planned, about Obi-Wan's smile, because now that he's over the earth-shattering revelation that Obi-Wan sits like that for a reason (he'll never get over it, let's be honest), he's feeling slightly romantic.
As much as he'd love to have Obi-Wan split him in half, he also longs for soft kisses and moments spent together where they both know they belong to one another. As more than just Master and Padawan. As equals. As lovers. Anakin sighs as he writes something fluffy and probably embarrassingly poetic about how gorgeous Obi-Wan is when he smiles and how much he'd like to be the one to put that smile on his face.
He schedules that one for when they're hopefully having dinner together, and then gets up to actually get some Jedi work done. Just for a bit, of course. He's not wasting his rare break on paperwork. He has better things to do in the meantime. Like relaxing. And jerking off. And thinking about Obi-Wan.
Well, he does that last one all the time, but still. Even if it's not appropriate it's still at least less dangerous when he's not actively in the middle of a battle.
Really, the Council should be thanking him for getting all of his horny and/or romantic thoughts out while he's at the Temple. It might make him more effective in battle, not that he and Obi-Wan aren't already the most effective team out there.
Anakin only stops his ruminating thoughts and dubious paperwork when Obi-Wan comes back to the apartment.
"Oh, good, Master, you're back," he says casually, lightly tossing the paperwork onto the opposite couch cushion. "I was just wondering what you wanted for dinner."
"Anything is fine, Anakin," Obi-Wan says, he sounds a little tired but not more than usual, so Anakin shrugs it off and jumps up to see what they have in the kitchen.
Anakin is by far the better cook out of the two, as Obi-Wan grew up with Qui-Gon and temple meals, whereas Anakin grew up with his single mother and poverty teaching him how to make whatever he could get his hands on at the very least edible, if not pleasantly so. He likes cooking for Obi-Wan, but the man doesn't seem to have any favorite meals, which annoys Anakin occasionally. How is he supposed to make the things he likes if he doesn't know?
He chooses a stew that he knows at the very least Obi-Wan will eat, and that they have the ingredients for. It also won't take too long to make, which means that Anakin can spend more time sitting with Obi-Wan at the dining table. Possibly when his next post is scheduled for...He does kind of want to see Obi-Wan's reaction to it.
At least it was sweet...he hopes. Although, unfortunately, that won't garner a reaction like the one from this morning. Seeing Obi-Wan flustered, seeing him blush ....Anakin wants more.
Well, at least he has content for tomorrow.
He finishes up the stew and pours himself and Obi-Wan each a bowl. Obi-Wan thanks him as he sits at the table and digs in. Anakin grins and watches Obi-Wan eat for a bit before reaching for his own food. He glances at the clock in the kitchen. Hm. Not much longer now.
He brushes their legs together on autopilot and then doesn't want to move his foot. He's almost startled by his own boldness. He's actually touching Obi-Wan!
And then, of course, Obi-Wan's datapad gets an alert, and he leans back in his chair, pulling himself away from Anakin to check it.
"They sure are active," Obi-Wan murmurs under his breath, turning on his datapad and navigating to the holo site. Anakin watches Obi-Wan's every reaction as he reads the post. The slight furrow of his brows, the darting of his eyes across the screen, and then, the very faint pinkening of his cheeks.
Oh, he got him to blush anyway. How lovely.
"More speculation?" he asks with a raised eyebrow. He spears a piece of meat on his fork, pretending he's not watching avidly for Obi-Wan's answer.
"No, merely... appreciation," Obi-Wan says slowly, dropping the datapad and pushing it to the side of the table. "Never mind that; I'll have to talk to Cody again tomorrow." Anakin briefly wonders if Obi-Wan had told Cody that the last post about his dick was accurate. The thought makes him so irrationally jealous that he nearly misses Obi-Wan's next words. "It seems we may have to bring this up to the Council."
"What?!" he blurts out a second too late as the words filter through his brain. "You'll have to—what? Why?"
He tries not to sound as frantic as he is, but how can he help it, they're going to bring it up to the Council. They're going to see all of the inappropriate pics that Anakin took, all of the posts about his dick size and his mouth—for Force's sake, he called it "Obi-Wan-Kenobis-Babygirl"!
If he thought this couldn't get any more embarrassing, he was wrong.
Obi-Wan gives Anakin an unimpressed look. "Because, Anakin, this is becoming a threat to Temple security," he says slowly, that same tone he used when Anakin was still a youngling and needed things explained. "We cannot let this person continue posting like this when they have been inside the Temple without informing the Council."
Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no.
What has he done? How has he gotten himself into this situation?
"No need to bring this to the council," he says quickly. Confessing might be less embarrassing than bringing it to the Council. Maybe. Quicker, at least. "It's...it's not a threat to security."
"No? And why is that?" Obi-Wan asks, staring Anakin down. Oh Force, he's really going to have to admit it. This is terrible. This is awful. Anakin should have never started that blog.
"Because I'm the one who runs it." The words all come out in a rushed jumble and Anakin really really hopes that Obi-Wan didn't actually understand any of them.
But, clearly, he does. His eyes go wide and his face goes pale. "What?" he asks anyway. Probably to torment Anakin. He deserves it.
"It's my blog," he admits tiredly. "I'm the one who took those photos. No one broke in."
"Anakin, why have you been writing a blog about me with...such content?" Obi-Wan asks, looking baffled, his face still drained of color. This really really really was a bad idea. Maybe Anakin should ask Master Yoda to meditate with him or something, then he shudders at the thought and dismisses it completely.
"Do you really want the answer to that?" he mutters. He can't look at him anymore, and drops his eyes down to the stew he made. Suddenly, he's not hungry. "I didn't mean for it to get so big. Or for you to actually see it.
"Clearly," Obi-Wan says dryly, but his voice comes out hoarse and croaky. Anakin would usually take pleasure in throwing him off so severely, but this time he thinks it'll have disastrous consequences.
"I just...I needed a place to vent my thoughts, and meditating wasn't working, and it's not like I could ask you to meditate with me," Anakin says, pushing the stew around in his bowl. He can't look up at Obi-Wan, can't meet his eyes. What is Obi-Wan thinking? Oh, he's going to be disgusted. He'll want nothing to do with Anakin after this.
"Anakin, you can always ask me to meditate with you," he admonishes kindly. Anakin looks at him, then, shocked. Does he not get it?
"About this?!" he asks hysterically. "Do you not understand what I'm saying, or are you so devoted to the code you want to purge me of these things despite the discomfort?" he can't help but ask.
"My loyalty to the code has nothing to do with this. If you want my help, you have it," Obi-Wan says plainly as if it's that easy! It's not.
"How can you say that when I've been—when I've been lusting after you for months, years at this point!" Anakin feels the strange urge to throw his hands up in frustration.
"Years?" Obi-Wan asks, thrown off this time. Although this time he sounds curious, instead of appalled, which is...good?
"Did you not see how far back the blog went? You said you went through the whole blog," he mutters. The only things sixteen-year-old Anakin was correct about are on that website.
Not that he wants Obi-Wan to see all of those thoughts either. He was desperate as a teenager and had even less of a filter than he does now.
"I have to say, I didn't scroll back that far. Perhaps I ought to," Obi-Wan muses. It's Anakin's turn to stare at Obi-Wan, his mouth hanging open.
"Why?" he asks incredulously. "Can't we just—drop it? Now that you know there's no danger? We're not being stalked, so." He shifts uncomfortably in his chair, and he wishes it was because he was sore instead of because he was anxious and vulnerable in front of the person he cares most about in the entire galaxy.
"No, I suppose there isn't any danger then. I'll let Cody know," Obi-Wan says without answering Anakin's question. Did he only say that he would look at the rest of the blog because he wants to humiliate Anakin? Anakin wants to think that isn't the answer, but he isn't sure. He's never had to navigate anything like this with Obi-Wan.
"Great, and I'll delete the blog and we can go back to normal—" It's less of a statement and more of a question, and less of a question than fervent, hopeful begging. Please, let them go back to normal. If he lost Obi-Wan over something as stupid as this...
Obi-Wan's brow furrows. "Now why would you do something silly like that?"
"What?" Anakin asks flatly, too shocked to put any real emotion behind his words. "You—Don't you want me to delete it? I mean, now that you know it's me, surely you don't want it up anymore, I mean why would you?" Anakin laughs a self-deprecating laugh, trying not to shrink in on himself too much.
Obi-Wan gently reaches over the table, fingers gentle under his chin, lifting his head until he's forced to make eye contact with him. He looks serious, completely serious, and Anakin tries not to panic. "Anakin," he says quietly. "I could listen to you talk about how much you want me forever."
Anakin knows he's gaping at him, and he doesn't know how to stop.
"You—You what " Anakin manages somehow despite his shock. Does Obi-Wan even know what he's saying? Does he have any idea of the effect it's having on Anakin?
"Please, don't stop on my account." Obi-Wan leans forward a little closer. "I like it better knowing that it's you."
Anakin is light-headed with need. "You can have the real thing," he says, brain-to-mouth filter broken. "You don't have to get it second hand, through a screen. I'll tell you whatever you want to hear, right now." He's getting desperate for it suddenly. Obi-Wan likes that it's him? Wants him, even?
And Obi-Wan's hand is still tilting his chin up, still touching him. "Is that right, dearest?" Obi-Wan asks, his eyes are narrowed, his pupils dilated. Is he... Is he getting off on this? Could Anakin get him hard and panting? Could Anakin get Obi-Wan to fuck him the way he's been dreaming about?
Anakin nods quickly, careful not to dislodge Obi-Wan's hand off his face, wanting him to never stop touching him. "Yes. Just tell me where you want to start." He'll dig up all of those old, embarrassing, unfiltered sixteen-year-old fantasies, he'll beg if that's what Obi-Wan wants to hear, anything.
Obi-Wan hums thoughtfully, staring Anakin down. "Why don't you start from the beginning, hm? When did you start your little blog? What was the catalyst that made you decide to put all your thoughts on the HoloNet for everyone to see?"
Anakin whines, high and almost inaudible in his throat. Almost. He knows Obi-Wan hears it because his grip tightens just slightly. "W-when I was sixteen. I just...needed an outlet. Meditation wasn't working, and I thought it would fade, as puberty ended, but it just got worse —" He remembers how frustrated he was, back then. When nothing would make the constant itch of want under his skin abate, when his inappropriate desire for his Master was only getting stronger when it was supposed to be fading.
That's when he realized it wasn't just a simple crush.
"Is that why you were so distracted that year?" Obi-Wan asks his thumb absentmindedly rubbing at Anakin's chin. Force, Anakin hopes Obi-Wan keeps touching him like this.
"Yes," Anakin admits. That had probably been one of the worst years of his training. "I didn't mean for it to get out of hand, but I was mortified and it's not like I had anyone I could ask for help."
"I told you, Anakin, you can always ask me for help," he chides. Personally, Anakin thinks the wait was worth it for this.
"W-what do you want to know next?" Anakin asks, voice shaky and a whimper trapped in his throat.
"What were you thinking when you made that post this morning?" Obi-Wan asks after a long pause, his voice low. "You knew I was going to see it, and you still posted it anyway. Did you want me to see it? Is that it?"
Anakin practically trembles. "I knew I had to keep up the posts—if they suddenly stopped only after I learned you were looking into it, it would look suspicious—"
Obi-Wan chuckles. "Oh trust me, dear one, I wouldn't have suspected you in a million years. I would have considered it 'wishful thinking'."
Anakin blushes a bright red. Obi-Wan is going to be the death of him.
"What are you going to do about it? Now that you do know it's me?" Anakin asks, and he desperately, desperately hopes that Obi-Wan's answer will fall somewhere in the realm of fuck you within an inch of your life. Wishful thinking on Anakin's part, maybe, but maybe not if the look Obi-Wan is giving him is anything to go by.
"First, I want you to finish answering my question." That sounds impossible when Anakin is already so hard it hurts and the only thing he can think about is Obi-Wan's voice and his hands. Obi-Wan seems to understand this, somehow, and does the unthinkable: he pulls his hand away.
Anakin barely stops a disappointed whine from slipping unbidden out of his throat. He doesn't know if Obi-Wan would appreciate such a sound. He takes a second to reorient himself before turning back to stare at Obi-Wan, he wants Obi-Wan's hands back on him now, but that won't happen until he answers all of his Master's questions.
"I can't say the fact that you were going to see it didn't cross my mind when I made the post," he admits, somehow still shy. "But that's a thought I've been having for a while," he confesses, wishing he could crawl into a hole. Obi-Wan didn't ask about that, he could have kept that private.
Obi-Wan pushes up from the table, slipping around behind Anakin, arms caging him in against the table.
Anakin swallows another embarrassing sound. This is going to be harder than he thought. He really hopes that Obi-Wan doesn't think him too desperate, because he is—desperate, that is, but he doesn't want that to be a turn-off for Obi-Wan.
"Do you fantasize about that often? What I would look like?" Obi-Wan asks, almost conversationally.
"You've seen the blog," Anakin points out desperately.
"I have," Obi-Wan agrees. "And given the fact that you posted almost three times a day, the answer seems pretty clear. But I want you to say it."
Anakin is going to pass out. Anakin is going to come. Anakin is having the time of his life.
"I thought about it practically every night, Master," Anakin breathes out softly. "At the very least, I thought about it every single time I got myself off. Pretending that it was you who was pressing into me and that you were going to make me sore enough that I wouldn't be able to walk for days. "
"And when was the last time you did that, hmm?" At least he's starting to sound a little breathless. Anakin wants that composure to break so he can finally take what he wants.
"This morning," Anakin says, without shame, remembering his desperation for more, more, more, and with Obi-Wan behind him like this he might finally get it.
"This—morning?" Obi-Wan asks, and, yep, definitely breathless by now. "Was that before or after I left?"
"After, but only because I heard what you said as you were leaving. I needed—I couldn't think, I needed to get off," Anakin says with a small shrug, that he just barely manages to make look casual.
Obi-Wan groans. "You heard that?" he asks, voice aroused and appalled all at once. Anakin nods, leaning back in his chair, wishing he could press right up against Obi-Wan.
"Like I said, I couldn't think. You kind of broke me, I was only focused on getting off, knowing you were as big as I thought you were, bigger, even, that you would fill me just the way I dreamed—"
"Anakin," Obi-Wan cuts off sharply. He looks frazzled, affected. Anakin needs him. Now. Three years ago. Whenever.
"Yes, Master?" he asks when Obi-Wan doesn't actually keep talking.
"...There's no going back from here," he cautions.
"Good," Anakin says. He'll never want anyone else. Not tomorrow, not next week, not in a decade. Not when the last star in the universe burns out. He'll never stop wanting Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan stands and Anakin almost thinks that he's just going to leave. That he'll leave Anakin here, alone and desperate and so very horny. But, he glances over his shoulder at Anakin. "Aren't you coming?"
Anakin doesn't think he's ever stood up faster.
He's lightheaded from a combination of standing up too fast and having no blood left for his brain. Luckily, Obi-Wan is there to catch him, to rest his broad hands on his forearms, holding him steady.
"Keep daydreaming about your hands, too," he feels compelled to say if only to watch Obi-Wan shudder.
"Well, there are only so many fantasies we can fulfill in one night," Obi-Wan says, and Anakin dearly hopes that doesn't mean Obi-Wan only wants to do this once. He pulls Anakin by the hand to the bedroom, and Anakin only has brief moments to luxuriate in the feeling of holding hands with Obi-Wan.
Then Obi-Wan's (wide, strong, capable) hands (that look so good wrapped around a lightsaber) are pressed gently against his chest, guiding him back onto the bed—Obi-Wan's bed. Oh, he wants to wrap himself in the blankets and burrow his face into his pillow and inhale his scent.
Later. After the sex. As long as Obi-Wan doesn't kick Anakin out of his room right after. Anakin tries not to dwell on that thought, especially because he's laid out on the bed and Obi-Wan is hovering above him, looking like he wants to devour Anakin.
He looks up at him, waiting for him to make the first move, desperate for so much he doesn't know where to start. His eyes glance down to Obi-Wan's trousers and Force, he's hard. Meaning Anakin can see him almost fully through his trousers; can imagine cupping him through the fabric, which he would lean forward to do if he wasn't so dumbstruck by the sight. As it is, he's pinned down by his own arousal, a noise of pure need coming from his throat.
Obi-Wan is staring down at him, his eyes focused on Anakin’s face. Anakin wonders if Obi-Wan will lean down and kiss him. Or if that would be too far even for him. He can’t tell, and Obi-Wan is frustratingly still above him.
"Please," he says softly, torn between coming off as needy and getting what he wants. He'll beg if that's what he needs to do, does Obi-Wan want him to beg?
Rather than give a verbal answer, Obi-Wan reaches down to start undoing the fastenings of Anakin’s robes. Oh, he can work with this. He hopes Obi-Wan likes what he sees.
He helps Obi-Wan rid him of his clothes, the man gently kneeling to pull off his boots in a move that makes his heart skip a beat. He can't focus on that, so instead he works on pulling off his pants and tunic.
When he’s laid out completely bare on the bed, Obi-Wan stops again, his intense gaze making Anakin squirm.
"Master?" he asks hesitantly.
"You're gorgeous, Anakin," he says, voice low, and Anakin turns pink at the seriousness in his voice, the pure devotion. He can't stand it. He wants more.
"Pretty enough for you to write blog posts about?" Anakin can’t help but tease. And maybe a small part of him is fishing for compliments, not that he’d admit that.
"No," Obi-Wan says, eyes still tracing every part of his body. "I want to keep this, keep you, all to myself."
Anakin wants to tease him about attachment, about the code, but he wants that so badly too the words get stuck in his throat. He tries to swallow them down.
"Will you touch me then?" he blurts out instead. Which, really isn’t the worst thing he could have said, considering he’s desperate for Obi-Wan’s touch.
Obi-Wan gently cups his face, which is sweet, but then his hands are trailing downwards, over his sides and stomach, brushing over where he wants them. Anakin moans, but then his hands retreat, cupping his thighs instead.
"What do you want, dear one?" he asks, like Anakin has any brain power to answer.
"Master—You—Inside me," Anakin somehow manages despite feeling like his brain has been completely fried.
Obi-Wan makes a soft sound that Anakin can’t quite place, but then he nods. "Yes, I suppose we can arrange that."
Holy shit. Holy shit, this is actually happening. He's going to get Obi-Wan inside him.
Obi-Wan grabs something—lube, kriff—but Anakin is more focused on trying to get his clothes off. He'll finally see everything, get to appreciate everything.
Obi-Wan lets Anakin undress him, and Anakin may or may not call on the Force a little bit to help him move faster. Not that Obi-Wan has to know that particular fact—he’s pretty sure that Obi-Wan would consider this an improper use of the Force. Once Obi-Wan is in a similar state of undress as Anakin, Anakin stares at his body.
And he thinks Anakin is attractive? Anakin can't look away from him. He's broad-shouldered, with perfect arms Anakin wants around him, or at least holding Obi-Wan above him. He's clearly strong, and Anakin wants him to use that strength, or maybe to crush him underneath his weight, so Anakin can feel him everywhere, completely enveloped by him.
And, fuck, his dick. Anakin needs that in him, like, yesterday.
Thankfully, Obi-Wan seems to agree with Anakin’s impatience because he slicks up his fingers and reaches his hand between Anakin’s thighs. His eyes dart between Anakin’s face and where Anakin wants him most. Anakin lets his legs fall open even further, waiting for Obi-Wan to finally press inside.
He slips one finger in, and Anakin sighs happily. Still slightly stretched from earlier, one finger quickly becomes two. Anakin is moaning now, trying to bite them back but unable to when Obi-Wan brushes over his prostate.
His body jolts a little when Obi-Wan presses against that spot again. Force. Anakin is desperate to feel Obi-Wan’s dick hit his prostate.
"Master," he moans quietly, thrusting his hips lightly against Obi-Wan’s fingers.
"Yes, dear one?" he murmurs, gaze not straying from where his fingers are opening Anakin up, focusing intently on the way his hole stretches.
Anakin was going to be impatient and demand that Obi-Wan split him open with his cock already, but Anakin can’t deny that he likes the look on Obi-Wan’s face. Single-mindedly focused on stretching Anakin open and staring down at his hole. Yeah, he can be patient if Obi-Wan just keeps looking at him like that.
Obi-Wan doesn't even seem to notice that he hasn't answered his question, instead slipping a third finger into him, stretching Anakin to his limits. Limits that are about to be pushed (broken) when Obi-Wan slides inside. He presses a fourth finger at his entrance, and Anakin is ready.
"Master, please," Anakin begs softly.
"Hm?" Obi-Wan hums, finally glancing up at Anakin’s face.
"’M ready," Anakin mumbles, knowing his face has gone completely red.
"Right," Obi-Wan says, clearing his throat and pulling away. Anakin whines when he pulls his fingers out, feeling empty, but he knows soon it'll be replaced by something far better.
Obi-Wan carefully slicks up his cock until it’s practically dripping. Anakin hopes he isn’t drooling. That would be kind of embarrassing. He stares as Obi-Wan carefully lines himself up with Anakin’s entrance. Sithhells. He’s really going to do it.
"Breathe," Obi-Wan prompts, and as Anakin inhales Obi-Wan pushes into him, just a little, linking them together. Even that is so much, and Anakin chokes on the breath he just took. He's so big. Bigger than he anticipated, and Anakin has thought about this a lot.
But thinking about it while he has four fingers pushed into himself and actually experiencing it are two very different things.
"Breathe, Anakin," Obi-Wan repeats gently, pausing his movement to give Anakin a chance to catch his breath.
"More," he moans as soon as he has his breath back. "Please, Master." He knows Obi-Wan has barely pushed in, and he wants to take all of him.
"Are you sure?" he asks, running a hand through Anakin's curls. "You're tight, Anakin. I could stretch you more first—" If he thinks Anakin is going to let him go after having him, he's sorely mistaken.
"No," Anakin answers firmly. "I can take it. I want it."
"If you’re sure," Obi-Wan murmurs.
"More than sure," Anakin whispers back. And, finally, Obi-Wan goes back to pressing into Anakin’s body.
He stretches Anakin so perfectly, better than anything Anakin has ever experienced, a million times better than his own hands. He fills him so well, that Anakin can't help but go limp and just take it, fighting to keep his eyes open so he can watch Obi-Wan's face.
Obi-Wan is staring down at him, his hands braced on either side of Anakin’s body, encasing Anakin beneath him. There really is nowhere Anakin would rather be.
"Anakin," he gasps out, pushing the rest of the way in. "Are you alright, dear one? Force, you feel incredible."
Anakin wraps his legs around Obi-Wan’s waist, the way he’s dreamed about doing. "Yes," Anakin breathes out. " Perfect, Master. You’re perfect."
Obi-Wan leans down, pressing kisses and bites into his chest, leaving him panting and writhing, arching up off the bed and into his mouth, needing more and less and everything all at once. He slides one hand into Obi-Wan's hair, the way he dreamed, three limbs holding him as close as he can. He tangles his mechno-hand in the sheets.
Anakin is definitely going to be sore tomorrow—especially once Obi-Wan picks up the pace a bit. The thought is delightful. Hopefully, no one asks why. He can blame it on lightsaber training maybe.
Obi-Wan rocks into him and he can't think anymore. Who cares if they find out? This is the best thing to ever happen to him. He moans with every movement of Obi-Wan's hips.
"Obi-Wan," Anakin breathes out, too quiet to really be heard between the moans and the sounds of skin on skin. Obi-Wan presses deep into him, hitting his prostate hard every so often.
He's so close, and he doesn't have the words to inform him, too lost in Obi-Wan's thrusts, in the feeling of him in him, in how good it feels.
Anakin tries to warn Obi-Wan that he’s going to come, but all he manages is a desperate moan as he spills. Force. His mind whites out with pleasure. Anakin is going to be thinking about this for years. That was the best orgasm he’s ever had.
He comes down feeling all warm and hazy, but that's ruined slightly when Obi-Wan tries to pull out.
He wraps his legs tighter around him, inadvertently getting Obi-Wan to slip deeper, which distracts him for a moment as he moans. "Where do you think you're going?" he asks, glaring (pouting) up at him.
"You're overstimulated, Anakin," Obi-Wan points out. Luckily for him, Anakin doesn't care. He'd want Obi-Wan inside of him no matter how overstimulated he got.
"But I still want you to come. In me," Anakin says flatly, looking up at Obi-Wan through his lashes. "Come on, you’re still hard and I want you to."
"I can't bear to hurt you," Obi-Wan murmurs, thrusting in just slightly and grimacing at the slightly pained whine Anakin makes.
"I like it," he confesses. Anakin clenches down around him with a moan, and, finally, Obi-Wan moves again. The first thrust was involuntarily, perhaps, but with each one, he gets closer and therefore more incapable of stopping as Anakin's body draws his orgasm from him.
Anakin does let his eyes fall shut in this moment, letting himself just feel the way Obi-Wan is thrusting into him. It's better than he ever could have imagined.
His eyes fly open when he feels Obi-Wan's thrusts start to stutter. He wants to see the expression Obi-Wan makes when he comes.
He's gorgeous, eyes shut in pleasure, mouth parting around a moan that would get him hard if he hadn't come so recently (and might still anyway), hair falling into his face.
Anakin was right. His hair is disheveled, his brow slightly slick with sweat. He looks even more beautiful than he does in the heat of battle. Anakin should keep a running tally of how many of his blog posts are turning out to be true.
He'll have to go back through them—maybe read them out as he confirms which ones are true, as Obi-Wan seemed to like that—at some point. Not yet, however, for now, he needs to appreciate the sight of Obi-Wan above him and dream of kissing him, of getting another night like this one.
Obi-Wan, once he comes down from his high, carefully pulls back from Anakin. Despite himself, Anakin lets his legs drop down away from Obi-Wan's waist. He wants to see if Obi-Wan will still stay, even without Anakin holding him in place.
Obi-Wan moves off of him and then climbs off of the bed completely, much to Anakin's disappointment. Is he not going to stay? Where is he going to sleep? Anakin is in his bed.
But he returns not long later with a washcloth, and Anakin sighs with relief.
He wipes Anakin down carefully, almost reverently, but that would be ridiculous. Despite...all of this, Obi-Wan is still a Jedi, and he still sticks with close adherence to the code. Anakin is also disappointed to notice that Obi-Wan has redressed himself with pants, though, much to Anakin's pleasure, his chest remains bare.
"C'mere," he says once Obi-Wan is done, because even if he is still a responsible, code-following Jedi, Anakin is not, and they've shared a bed before (on missions and after nightmares, slightly different but not so different he couldn't swing it this way) so it shouldn't be hard to do it again. And maybe, once Obi-Wan is asleep, he could kiss his hair and his forehead and pretend he had a little bit more, and pretend he won't feel cold tomorrow without Obi-Wan's body to warm his own.
Obi-Wan doesn't say anything, but he's looking at Anakin sort of fondly, and he lets Anakin pull him close. It's just a hug. Or well, it's just cuddling. Surely that isn't against the code. Everyone needs physical affection sometimes, even Obi-Wan.
Especially Obi-Wan, if they're being honest. The man has been through a lot. Anakin would hug him until he wasn't sad anymore if he thought that was possible.
He'll have to make do with this, their bodies pressed together as close as he can get them.
This is nice. Peaceful. Anakin feels more at ease than he ever does after meditating. He thinks Obi-Wan can probably feel it because he, too, is relaxed in bed. It's quiet and Anakin lets his mind drift, feeling calm and close to sleep.
And then—and then, because Obi-Wan is perfect and everything Anakin could ever want, he feels a soft brush of lips over his hair, and his forehead, and his cheek, because apparently Obi-Wan had the exact same thought he did, and maybe it's not impossible that he wants him just as much. In the same way.
Anakin tilts his head, just slightly to the side—a question, an invitation. One which Obi-Wan accepts with a gentle press against Anakin's lips. Anakin melts back into the sheets, the kiss is soft and warm and perfect.
His heart is fluttering in his chest, and he brings one hand up to cup the back of Obi-Wan's neck, leaning into the warmth of Obi-Wan's mouth. He could do this forever.
He would probably try if Obi-Wan didn't pull back. Anakin's eyes flutter open slowly, disappointed that Obi-Wan pulled back, but the fond expression he's met with melts away that disappointment.
"Why'd you stop?" he murmurs, nudging his nose against Obi-Wan's, pressing their foreheads together, brushing their mouths against one another. He wants to get as close as he can, and then closer. Obi-Wan kisses Anakin again instead of answering, pressing their lips together in another soft, languid kiss. Anakin would very much like to keep kissing him like this over and over again, but then Obi-Wan is pulling away.
"Dearest, as much as I'd like to continue this, I ought to tell Cody that your blog is no longer a security risk, or he might go to the council himself."
Anakin can't help but laugh. He'd forgotten about that. Suddenly, having people see it doesn't seem so bad. His love for Obi-Wan already feels so clearly on display.
On the other hand, he doesn't need Mace Windu thinking about someone (thinking about Anakin) speculating about the size of Obi-Wan's dick, so perhaps he should let him up.
"But you'll come back after?" Anakin says, trying and failing miserably to hide his pout. He just wants to cuddle with Obi-Wan, hold the man close, and fall asleep in his arms.
"Yes, Anakin," he promises, kissing him one more time before extracting himself from Anakin and the blankets. "I'll come back. I could never stay away from you," he says, like it's simple and not something that makes him want to drag Obi-Wan right back down into bed.
Anakin just barely manages to keep himself from dragging Obi-Wan back. He watches as Obi-Wan puts on the rest of his robes and straightens his hair, though it's still fluffier than it would normally be.
"Good enough?" he checks with Anakin.
"You know I think you're attractive no matter what," Anakin says, thinking of the hundreds if not thousands of posts dedicated to exactly that.
"I meant for a meeting with Cody, but thank you, dear one."
"Mmm, you only look sort of like you just fucked your Padawan," Anakin says lazily, grinning up at Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan seemingly resists the urge to roll his eyes. "Very well, I'll be back soon. Stay out of trouble," Obi-Wan throws over his shoulder as he leaves.
"How much trouble could I get up to while I'm in your bed?" he asks rhetorically. Meanwhile, his eyes dart over to a nearby datapad, from which he could absolutely make another post.
A lot of trouble, he thinks. A lot of very pleasurable trouble.
Obi-Wan is already leaving, though, and doesn't dignify that particular statement with a response. Anakin waits until the door to the apartment shuts and then he grins.
He reaches for the datapad.