Chapter Text
“What the hell is wrong with that child!” Dale throws his hands in the air as he and Peri walk into his room. “What’s wrong with you, ” Peri seethes, crossing his arms.
“What? I’m not the one that almost cost me thousands!” He sits on his bed, grinding his mostly golden teeth. His business opportunity was going to be the highlight of his career, and his child almost fucked everything up.
“You’re the one who screamed at your child for making a simple mistake .” The humanoid fairy pinches the bridge of his nose, and he wonders why he even thought to get romantically involved with this idiot.
“He needed discipline!”
“Oh my god, Dale, he’s ten. ”
“So? I was working under a lemonade stand for years when I was his age-”
“Yes, yes, we all heard about your stint in child labor, but tell me Dale, did your years in the lemon dungeon make you forget how to socialize? Maybe with your child?!”
“I know how to socialize, I’m just a busy man!”
“If being busy means you can’t bond with your child, you need to reduce your hours.”
“I have priorities! Devin understands.” “Ugh, I can’t with you!” Peri paces around the room, in agitation. Of course, he knew what he was signing up for, but god, Dale was insufferable.
“Why do you care so much?”
“Why don’t you?! I swear, how has CPS not taken your child from you?? Ugh, I’m out.” Turning to the door, Peri angrily gives up. Dale scrambles off the bed to follow, startled.
Grabbing onto his wrist, Dale questions, “Wait, what? Peri, where are you-”
“I’ve had enough, Dale! I was surprised when you were attracted to me, but how the hell am I higher of a priority than your son ! I’m leaving!”
“No, we can talk, I just-”
“I’ve been talking, Dale!” Yanking his wrist back, Peri shouts, “Ever since you hired me, I’ve been trying to get you to realize how terrible of a father you are, and you haven't gotten a clue! I signed up to babysit a ten year old, not his childish father!”
At the hurt look on Dale’s face, he sighs. “Look Dale, you’re alright and all, but I just can’t date a dude who treats his kid badly. My adopted brother had horrible parents, and I wouldn't wish that on anybody, especially Dev.”
“But- I thought you liked me!” Dale whines.
“Listen, when you fell in love with me, I kinda liked you back, but you’ve been whining and crying about shit that doesn't matter instead of having a relationship with Dev.”
“You’ve been acting like a child then getting mad at your ten year old son! Listen Dale, when you grow a pear, you can call me back.” With that, Peri leaves Dale alone in his room, and the man falls in his bed, devastated. Grabbing his pillow, he screams into it, muffled.
Peri knocks quietly on Dev’s door, and when he gets a response, he walks in to Dev face down on his bed.
“Heya kid, you alright?”
“No….” Dev replies, “I didn’t mean to mess things up.”
“I know, accidents happen, right? If there’s anyone I’m mad at, it’s your dad.”
“Really?” “Yeah, I think we’re gonna be taking a little break.”
“Will you- will you stop coming here?”
“Heavens no, I wouldn’t leave you alone. I’m just going to be furious with him for a little while.”
Later in the night, Dale stares at a photo of him and Peri on his phone, eyes red-rimmed. The photo was from a media article, as news reporters had speculated on their relationship when they had first started dating.
Of course he knew he probably liked Peri more than he did him, but the break up still hit hard. He’s never been rejected before, but if he knew it felt like this, he wouldn’t have even pursued the purple haired man.
“When you grow a pear, you can call me back.” His finger hovers over the contact for Peri on his phone. Of course, Peri didn’t break everything off, he just needs to improve his relationship with his son. Then everything will be fine, and Peri will like him again, and his life will be perfect again.
He’s got everything handled .
No he does not. How the hell does he bond with a kid anyway? He sent the au pairs to research everything about bonding with children, but he feels utterly confused.
He clicks on a link, titled 8 Ways to “Strengthen a Parent-Child Relationship”. That sounds promising.
“ Say “I love you” often, ” He could do that, if a few words would fix everything, this would be a breeze.
“ Set boundaries, rules, and consequences, ” Oh, he does that all the time! Peri needs to watch out, he’ll be the number one dad in a blink!
“Listen and empathize,” Oh shit. Well maybe not everything on this list was going to be easy. But he’ll be fine. Reading the rest of the list, he has some form of rules to help him. Just be nice and spend time with him, he could do that.