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“It’s so bloody cold here,” Siuan complains as she and Moiraine sit by the river. They snuck out this morning, because Siuan was homesick and needed to be close to the water. But the Erinin feels so achingly different here that Siuan only misses Tear more. Back home it’s still hot, the water warm. Siuan’s toes grow cold as she sits with her feet in the river and misses the warmth of swimming as a girl. Back home, Siuan would be helping her papa get their chores done so they could nap and avoid the midday heat.
“It’s only the first day of autumn.” Moiraine’s brow is furrowed as she sits beside Siuan, dress pulled up above her knees, seemingly enjoying the far too cold water. Most people here tease Siuan for her hatred of the cold, but Moiraine just worries, leaves all her warmest sweaters in Siuan’s room, feigning forgetfulness. It had been early spring when Siuan and Moiraine arrived at the White Tower, and the evenings still felt bitterly cold to Siuan. “We’ll have to get you a warm coat for winter.”
When Moiraine says things like this, Siuan believes that maybe Moiraine feels the same way Siuan does. She’d been drawn to Moiraine since the first day they met, felt an instant connection that Siuan couldn’t explain. She’d wondered then what she could possibly have in common with a Cairhienin noble. But these last six months Moiraine has listened to Siuan talk of home, hugged her while she cried, snuck out with Siuan every time she was feeling homesick. They made each other laugh, played pranks together and giggled, and so many nights, Siuan wanted to kiss Moiraine.
“Or you could keep me warm,” Siuan replies. It’s innocent enough that she can shrug it off as a joke if she needs to, but Moiraine’s eyes go wide, her expression hopeful, Siuan thinks. Light, she hopes this isn’t just wishful thinking, but it seems like Moiraine is leaning closer.
“Keep you warm how?” Moiraine asks, and dear Light, now Siuan is sure there’s mischief in Moiraine’s eyes, playfulness that makes Siuan nearly certain that Moiraine knows exactly what Siuan wants.
Siuan’s heart hammers in her chest. “You could kiss me.”
It feels like an eternity before Moiraine moves, before her lips are on Siuan’s. Moiraine wraps her arms around Siuan, hands on her waist and lower back. Siuan’s heart pounds faster, and she struggles to remember how to breathe. She sits back panting, arms still wrapped around Moiraine, body hot and flushed now even in the autumn chill.
“Was that ok?” Moiraine asks. Her arms seem to pull Siuan closer, and they shift so their legs are touching. Siuan strokes Moiraine’s neck and watches her whole body tremble. “That was my first time kissing someone.”
“Mine too.” Siuan smiles at Moiraine, keeps stroking her neck to see the response Moiraine has, to feel Moiraine lean into Siuan’s touch, to see her breathing grow uneven. “I think we should do it again.”
Moiraine surges forward, one hand on Siuan’s face, the other still pressed to her lower back. Siuan thinks she won’t mind winter in Tar Valon at all.