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Another night, she watches him go. Shaky hands as he closes the front door and silent whispers of the stars and the void that’s been so familiar to him, but caused so much pain to her.
Was he that afraid of being caught that he changed places every night? Kae couldn’t help but wonder if it was normal for him. She would try not to pity Ash though, because she knew that if he found out she did, he would hate and deny such a thing. She pushes the desperate feeling away.
The feeling to confront him. Confront? No, that feels wrong. It feels like she’s disappointed, dissatisfied with him. Not confronting, negativity would only pull her into a rut.
She could offer a place to stay! A place, but he’s already doing that, he would counter. He just changes that place more often than Kae would like.
She shouldn’t care.
She knows he wouldn’t want her to care.
But when she’s already caring for so much, who’s one more familiar face to care about?
And so she watches him settle again into the night. Familiar faces and places and it pains her so dearly that the names start to fade from her memories. She swore they wouldn’t fade from her memories. Shadows and bones of how lively the places, no longer homes, used to be.
And so she’ll repeat the names unto her last breaths, until her veins are untouched by new blood, her lungs empty of fresh oxygen and her heart’s pumping grows still.
Another night, she’ll wait.
It doesn’t feel right tonight, to interrupt the monotony of the pattern etched into both minds.
Awake when they shouldn’t,
But both unready to stumble into each other’s lives yet.