Chapter Text
An arrow is pulled from the quiver and placed on the bowstring.
Humans and wolves are enemies — both prey and predator simultaneously. There is a natural push and pull between them that continues throughout the centuries. It’s hard to track if any of them had shed more blood than the other. It’s not a game that either of them can win anyway.
A bowstring is slowly pulled back.
Most of them try to keep to themselves, in their respective tribes or packs, without interfering with others. This is the only way peace can be maintained for long periods. There are no fights as long as everyone keeps to themselves. Still, it happens that a human tribe and a wolf pack are living a few kilometers away from each other. It may sound inconceivable to some but a human child and pup can make an unlikely friendship with each other.
The arrow flies straight toward the target as cicadas hum under the dusky sky.
A heart filled with innocence has the ability to change the world. To be free of prejudice is to experience the taste of loving freely. A child and pup could love each other just like that, full of nativity and good-will. They may grow up to be adults and realize the wide gap between their worlds and the harsh reality will build a wall between them. Their love could still prevail.
The arrowhead lodges into the wolf’s side and it lets out a howl that doesn’t sound as animalistic as Hoseok expected. His heart plunges into his stomach.
Bow still in his hand, Hoseok bolts towards the wolf that’s now lying on the cold ground, warm blood trickling from its side onto the soft white snow. The wolf’s side heaves heavily and it lifts its head slightly to let out a yowl that makes Hoseok’s blood freeze with fear. He grips the bow tighter as he jumps over a trunk, his feet hitting the ground gracefully as he lands. Still, he knows he’s not being as graceful or as quiet as he should be, but right now none of that matters.
He jumps again, using his momentum to slide across the distance between him and the animal. He digs the heels of his feet into the ground to stop just right in front of it, dropping his bow next to him, and his worst fear is quickly becoming a reality. Up close, it’s so easy to see that the wolf is much bigger than the regular wolves that roam the tribe’s territory. As much as Hoseok wishes that this was just a wolf, he knows it’s not.
“I…” Hoseok reaches for the arrow but thinks better of it. Taking the arrow out would make the bleeding worse in all cases but this wolf is bleeding so much already that Hoseok has a hard time imagining more blood. He’s kneeling in blood and snow, mostly blood.
He shifts toward the wolf’s head, trying to make eye contact but he can clearly tell the wolf’s eyes aren’t focused on anything. The wolf inhales and death rattles its lungs as it exhales and Hoseok shrinks in on himself, fisting his hair as his panic spikes.
He was supposed to hunt wolves because a newborn was in need of a few more pelts.
Wolf shifters aren’t supposed to be in the human tribe’s territory.
He didn’t mean to kill one of them. He didn’t mean to.
An angry growl startles Hoseok out of his despair. His head turns and he spots two more wolves watching him — one with a white coat and another with a grayish coat. One of them is snarling at him and Hoseok reaches for his bow and another arrow, aiming it at the aggressive-looking one.
“I–I’m sorry. It was an honest mistake. I thought they were just a regular wolf,” Hoseok says, ignoring the way his voice trembles from the adrenaline. This wasn’t meant to happen but it’s too late now. He can’t even hear the wolf’s heavy breaths anymore.
The gray wolf snarls, its sharp, white teeth flashing in the descending darkness. The other wolf stops them from moving forward, stepping in front of the gray wolf and nudging it away with their body. The gray one lets out an almost annoyed exhale and then slowly turns away and starts running. The white one looks back and Hoseok pulls the bowstring tighter.
The wolf lifts its nose in the air and sniffs before running after the other one. Hoseok puts the bow on his back and the arrow back in its place and pushes himself up from the ground and starts running toward the creek that separates the wolf pack’s and the human tribe’s territory. He already knows what’s going to happen. Nobody kills a wolf from a pack and gets away with it. They will want his head for that and all Hoseok can think of is that he needs to get to Yoongi as quickly as possible.
So he runs faster than he ever did before, passing mossy pine trees and spruce trees behind, everything quickly becoming a blur. The freezing cold wind doesn’t make him shiver as much as two wolves howling from the distance do. It’s all happening so fast and he’s not even sure if he’s doing the right thing but he’s learned over the years that he needs to rely on his instincts.
His instincts are all screaming for Yoongi.
His tribe can’t protect him if the wolves came for him; he would only put them in harm's way. Not that Yoongi could defend him or vouch for him, but maybe there is something he can tell Hoseok. If not, at least Hoseok can say goodbye to him.
The stream bank has been their usual meeting spot ever since they first stumbled upon each other when Hoseok was six of age. He spots Yoongi walking up and down before the older sees him. He’s dressed more warmly than Hoseok is; the animal fur around his neck looks especially warm and, usually, Hoseok would give him a gentle compliment. His long brown hair matches the softness of his eyes. Yoongi rivals the beauty of angels.
Yoongi snaps his head toward him as soon as he’s in hearing distance and his eyes slightly widen as he studies Hoseok. He must be shocked by all the blood on Hoseok’s clothes. Hoseok has to be a scary sight.
In their many years of knowing each other, there were a few rules that they had to keep in order to preserve their friendship. They weren’t allowed to cross the creek or get near each other because Yoongi might carry the human scent back to the pack and he would be punished for it. They both knew the limitations of their friendship and the rules that they must uphold. So, when Hoseok jumps over the creek without a second of hesitation that must be an even scarier sight to Yoongi.
Hoseok stumbles forward, almost crashing into his friend and Yoongi looks at him like he can’t decide if he should help steady him or not. He ends up not moving forward but he looks alarmed, his body unnaturally rigid.
“Hy–hyung, there was an accident,” Hoseok wheezes. Panic feels like a cold snowball lodged in his throat, making it harder for him to breathe.
“What do you mean? What is this?” Yoongi asks. Then the wolves howl again, much closer than they were before. The pack isn’t that far from the creek as far as Hoseok knows, so trouble isn’t far off either.
“I was out hunting, and I shot a— I thought it was a regular wolf.” Hoseok hates how desperate his voice sounds even to his own ears even though he is desperate for Yoongi to believe him. Even if no one else will, Yoongi has to believe him. “I never would’ve hurt them if I knew they weren’t. You know I wouldn’t.”
Yoongi gapes at him. “You shot one of us?”
“Dead. The wolf died,” Hoseok says quietly. His throat feels too tight and his tongue too big in his mouth. It’s a wonder that any word even comes out of his mouth.
“Who?” Yoongi breathes, almost like he doesn’t want to know.
“I don’t know. There were two others but they ran to alert the others and—” Hoseok cuts himself off, knowing that this would lead them nowhere. “I came to you because you know me. You could tell them that I’m harmless and we could prove that with our friendship.”
Several emotions run through Yoongi’s face and Hoseok isn’t sure what any of them mean. He’s crossing every line and breaking so many rules. He should’ve run back to his tribe, to his aunt; that’s what most humans would do in his case: go home and prepare for a fight or to turn themselves in. However, most humans don’t have a best friend who is also a wolf.
Hoseok turns his head toward the direction of people shouting indecipherable things from a distance. He doesn’t have much time left and he knows it’s a stupid gamble. His gaze meets Yoongi’s again and he sees that the older is thinking about all the same things that he is. Another second passes before Yoongi’s shoulders go lax and he forces a kind smile onto his face.
“I’ll solve it somehow. Come here,” Yoongi says, opening his arms like he’s asking for a hug, but that makes Hoseok pause immediately. They have never touched each other before. Yoongi wouldn’t—
“How?”
Yoongi sighs but doesn’t lower his arms. “Do you trust me, Seok-ah?”
Hoseok nods without thinking and Yoongi’s smile seems more genuine after that. “I won’t let them hurt you, I promise. Let’s hug just this once.”
His heart is eager but his body feels sluggish as he takes the first step toward Yoongi. It feels more like a dream than reality. It’s as though he’s walking on pillowy clouds and Yoongi is nothing more than a mirage. It would be easier to think that this is all just a dream. How else could so much happen in such little time?
Hoseok always thought that Yoongi looked like someone who had a comforting touch. Sometimes he would daydream about extending a hand over the creek just to see if Yoongi would reach for him too. About Yoongi’s fingers skimming his skin. About how Yoongi's skin might feel like. He doesn’t need any convincing to step into Yoongi’s embrace now; this is what he's always wanted.
He puts his chin on the older’s shoulder, eyes falling shut as his arms wrap around Yoongi. Suddenly he feels like he could cry from everything, from this hug. He finally got what he always wished for and he might never experience it ever again. At least, if all things go south, he can remember this one hug that they shared, even if he was too much of a coward to conf—
Pulling Hoseok’s coat to the side, Yoongi pushes his face against his shoulder and bites down hard. Hoseok gasps, a shout lodged in his throat as he tries to back out of the hug but Yoongi holds him tighter and his teeth sink deeper for a second before he lets go of Hoseok entirely.
Hoseok stumbles back in disbelief, pressing his palm against his shoulder and he doesn’t have to check to know that Yoongi bit him hard enough to bleed. Yoongi doesn’t look at him, eyes set on the ground, the tips of his ears red.
“I’m sorry. There is no other way,” he says to Hoseok. There is no time for a reply because there are people, Yoongi’s pack, approaching them from most sides, and every face that Hoseok sees looks furious. On instinct he reaches for his bow, getting ready to shoot but there are too many of them; fighting them is not an option. Everyone is talking at the same time and Hoseok can’t understand anything other than the insults. A gentle hand touches his back and Hoseok feels something snap in place just then.
Something that wasn’t there before grows inside his chest.
Angry, protective, ready.
A man steps closer to them and Hoseok shifts his attention to him but Yoongi steps in front of him, blocking his arrow’s path, so Hoseok lowers his bow, not wanting to accidentally hurt Yoongi.
“You caught the murderer already, Yoongi-yah,” the man says, his eyes set on Hoseok instead of Yoongi. He looks slightly taller than both of them, dark hair and faint stubble on his chin. His eyes hold thinly veiled rage inside them. “Well done.”
He steps toward them but Yoongi holds out a hand to stop him from advancing. The angry crowd around them quickly grows surprised.
“It was an honest mistake, Hajun-ah. Let’s take this case to the pack alpha,” Yoongi says, his tone calm and self-assured. “He’ll decide what he wants to do with Hoseok.”
Hajun lets out a surprised laugh, shaking his head. “With whom? Do you know this human?”
“I know him, yes,” Yoongi admits easily. “He didn’t do it on purpose.”
“So, you break our rules and make friends with a human and now you’re trying to save him from justice?” Hajun asks, his voice made up of nothing but mockery. He steps closer and Yoongi’s hand splays across his chest, trying to force him to keep the distance between them.
“If you kill him, you will be breaking a rule. Not me,” Yoongi grits through his teeth, and that finally makes Hajun pause, his eyes flickering between Yoongi and Hoseok.
“What do you mean by that?”
“Show him what I did,” Yoongi orders, and Hoseok doesn’t question him. He places the bow and the arrow back in its place on his back and pulls his coat to the side. Everyone gasps in surprise or horror, and Hoseok isn’t dumb. He knows what a bite on the shoulder means. He’s been taught that as a child. Though he doesn’t think his brain has really caught up with this reality yet.
He remembers sitting in a small circle with other child while the teacher stood in the middle, telling him all about wolf behavior. It was important to learn because they have to be able to tell the difference between regular animal wolves and those who can turn into humans. Scenting, mating, marking was all part of what they learned, and Hoseok always felt confident in everything that he knew about wolves, not just because his teacher was good but because of Yoongi too.
“You mated him?” Hajun steps back, looking behind him at someone. “And you can’t go on about my break rule—”
“It is our most ancient rule. As a member of a wolf pack, you cannot harm or kill another wolf’s mate if they belong to the same pack as you. It is known by everyone,” Yoongi interjects, reciting some law that Hoseok has never heard about before. It finally makes sense why Yoongi bit him, but it sounds like Yoongi is just as involved in all this as Hoseok is.
Hoseok looks to the side, eying the faces around them. Most of them look outraged by the prospect of Yoongi claiming him but a few look apprehensive because of their rule. He has no idea if that’s a good thing or not.
“The pack alpha took you in out of the kindness of his heart and you would dare put him in this situation?” Hajun says, jaw set. Then he turns to the others, “Let’s take them to Jaejong then. He’ll decide their fate.”
Hoseok goes rigid as hands grab at him from all sides. He only tries to fight it for a few seconds before he realizes that they aren’t trying to hurt him, they are merely dragging him to the camp, and that they are doing the same with Yoongi too, who is looking all too defeated now that he partially stopped the crowd from trying to kill Hoseok.
Torches are lining the path to the wolf camp and a strange emotion swirls in Hoseok’s stomach as he spots the first tents. They are not unlike the ones that his tribe has. Some tents are bigger than others, the outside is covered in animal skin and a metal pipe comes out of the middle, puffing smoke into the night sky. Despite how familiar the tents all look, Hoseok still feels like he’s witnessing something forbidden. Something that wasn’t meant for his eyes.
The hands that had been dragging him suddenly thrust him onto the cold ground, tearing the bow and the arrow off his back. Hoseok catches himself before his knees can hit the ground and he instinctively moves toward Yoongi who was also thrust into the middle of the circle that the pack is now making around them. It’s just them, Hajun, and a tall man that Hoseok presumes to be the pack leader.
“Who’s going to tell me what’s going on?” The pack leader asks. He seems patient enough but there is an edge in his voice. He looks to be in his fifties, his hair mostly gray and there is a black line running down from his left cheek to his neck — a tattoo of some sort. He is clearly an alpha; Hoseok can sense it without hesitation.
Something throbs in his chest.
Agitation. Worry. Protectiveness.
Hajun takes a step forward, standing up as straight as possible, hands behind his back, and the leader nods in his direction to begin.
“Juwon, Kyusung, and I went on a walk at sunset and only Kyusung and I came back because that human scum murdered Juwon,” Hajun says, summing up the whole thing in an incredibly unfair way. Hoseok’s hands curl into fists, and he knows he should remain calm so he can explain his side of the story properly but Hajun is plainly vying for his execution.
“Where is Kyusung?” The leader asks, turning his head and he must catch the person’s eyes before motioning for him to step forward. “Join us.”
A crowd shifts and then a short man walks into the middle of the circle with uncertainty rolling off him. His hair is touching his shoulder and he looks shaken, uncomfortable to be in the center of attention right now. He keeps his eyes on the leader though.
“Is Hajun telling the truth about what happened?” The leader asks without batting an eye at his discomfort.
Hoseok watches as Kyusung links his fingers together and shifts in his spot awkwardly, his eyes finding Hajun’s before he looks back at the leader.
“Well… Well,” Kyusung swallows thickly and then tries again, “Yes, he does but—”
The leader’s head snaps toward Hoseok, eyes studying him from head to toe, and Hoseok steals himself, not wanting to look weak in front of the alpha. Every human knows that all wolves look down on humans, and think them to be weak and helpless against them but Hoseok isn’t planning on dying like a coward.
Interrupting Kyusung, the leader asks him, “Why would you kill one of ours?”
“I didn’t mean to. I was hunting on human territory,” Hoseok says, his voice thankfully coming out evenly. “I saw a wolf from a distance and I didn’t realize it wasn’t just a regular wolf. I would’ve never fired an arrow if I had known.”
“Why did you go into human territory?” The leader asks the other two.
“We didn’t know,” Hajun says.
And at the same time, Kyusung replies with, “We were curious.”
There is an audible murmur that runs through the crowd around them. Everyone is slowly realizing that the situation isn’t as black and white as Hajun is making it out to be. Hoseok feels eternally grateful for Kyusung’s honesty. He could easily lie and make things worse for Hoseok.
The pack leader’s forehead creases and his eyes land on Yoongi.
“What’s Yoongi’s role in all this?” he questions.
“The human ran to him for help and Yoongi mated him,” Hajun explains before Yoongi could answer for himself. Hoseok notices the way Yoongi clenches his jaw, unhappy with the other’s blabbering.
The leader blinks at him in a mix of shock and horror. “Mated him?”
“Jaejong, I’ve known Hoseok since I was a child,” Yoongi says, almost pleading. His voice is soft and genuine and the leader can’t miss it. “He’s not a bad person. I vouch for him.”
The leader, Jaejong, looks at him with disappointment. “Juwon was always smaller than the others.” Jaejong approaches them and Yoongi doesn’t stop speaking, though his voice gets quieter. “They shouldn’t have been in human territory anyway. It’s not hard to imagine that Juwon was mistaken for a regular wolf. It was a mistake and you can–should punish Hoseok, or us, but please don’t hurt him.”
His last words are nothing more than a whisper and Hoseok can’t stop staring at Yoongi’s side profile. He never thought there would be a day when he would see Yoongi begging to save his life but now that he did… His fingers itch with the need to pull Yoongi close. Maybe into a hug, or just to merely touch his body.
“You made everything more difficult than it needed to be,” Jaejong tells Yoongi in a low voice, his gaze turning to Hoseok, but his attention isn’t on Hoseok’s face. It’s on his shoulder where Yoongi’s bite is hidden by his coat. Hoseok sees it all then — the confusion that’s blending with some revulsion on Jaejong’s face.
The leader might understand why Yoongi mated him but on a deeper level, he doesn’t understand it. The concept of friendship between humans and wolves is a foreign one that hasn’t taken seed in his mind yet. There was only ever a tentative truce between tribes and packs. Hoseok knows Jaejong has never considered anything more and now Yoongi did something that goes even beyond friendship. It placed him in an awkward situation; Hoseok can see that much.
Yoongi mutters a quiet I’m sorry before Jaejong turns away with a sigh. He walks back to his previous spot. His steps look heavy and his head hangs low. When he lifts his head, Hoseok moves a bit closer to Yoongi as though that will brace him for what they are about to hear.
“I won’t make a decision today. Everyone go back to your tent,” Jaejong orders, and Hajun looks like he’s about to fight him on it, but the leader lifts his hand. “I don’t want to hear more of this tonight.” His head turns toward Hoseok and Yoongi. “The human is not allowed to leave camp. He stays with you, for now, Yoongi-yah.”
Yoongi nods, and Hoseok looks down when he feels a hand wrapping around his wrist. He’s barely registering what’s happening as Yoongi starts pulling him and the crowd dissolves around them.
Hoseok doesn’t say much but his heart races because they’ve evaded punishment for now. Jaejong might decide tomorrow but Hoseok gets a night of good sleep that he might not even deserve. Not only that but he’s going to spend it in Yoongi’s company without the distance, without a creek between them. They get to be themselves for at least one night and Hoseok finds endless comfort in that.
After a little bit of walking, Yoongi halts in front of a tent, pulls the flap door open, and motions for Hoseok to get in. Hoseok obeys without a sound. He certainly tried to imagine what Yoongi’s home might look like but in his mind, it wasn’t as warm and comforting as it is in reality. Hoseok spots a small metal stove in the middle, stacks of wood lying next to it, and a small pot sitting on top of it. The floor is covered with different colored rugs, even animal fur. Heaps of blankets lie in one corner and some wooden boxes on the other side. Hoseok sees that there is another flap door that likely leads to the place where Yoongi sleeps.
“So, this is my home,” Yoongi says, breaking the silence between them, and Hoseok’s attention shits back to him. “It will have to do for now.”
“You’re insane. You know that, right?” Hoseok asks, his voice coming out harsher than he intended. Yoongi does a double take before he goes and crouches down before the stove.
“I don’t think I know that,” Yoongi replies, pulsing the stove’s little door open to place some wood in it. Hoseok can’t help but feel annoyed that the older is avoiding his gaze so he takes his shoes off and walks to the other side of the stove and crouches down too.
“Why would you do that?” Hoseok asks, frowning. Yoongi continues to concentrate on his task, so Hoseok keeps going. “I know I asked for your help but biting me was too much, hyung.”
“I complicated the situation enough so that Jaejong can’t make an immediate decision. That’s a good thing for you. This is how I could help you,” Yoongi points out, but Hoseok doesn’t like that answer. At all. It makes him upset that they ended up in a more convoluted situation than it was in the beginning.
“Still… If you had only vouched for me, you wouldn’t have been so closely tied to this mess. But you ma–mat—”
Yoongi looks up finally. “We would've had to reveal our friendship anyway. There are only a few worse things than keeping a secret like that from the pack for so many years.”
“It looked like your leader thought biting me was worse judging by his reaction.” Hoseok can’t blame him for his reaction. Maybe he’s even a little jealous that others know the appropriate reaction to a bite like that. He wishes he knew how he felt about it.
“I can’t say I’m surprised by that,” Yoongi confesses, and looks down at his hands as he fiddles with something that Hoseok can't see. “He might end up using that as a punishment.”
Hoseok blinks repeatedly. “What do you mean?”
“It’s an incomplete mating mark,” Yoongi answers, his expression and tone closed off. “I bit you but you didn’t bite me. Right now you have a bond with me but not the other way around. If he were to ask us to sever the half bond that we have, it would hurt you. That might be the punishment that he’s looking for. It doesn’t sound as good now, does it?”
“I didn’t know all that stuff about severing,” Hoseok admits, shrinking back on himself. It does sound like a good punishment. Being in pain for a while is better than being dead, but something feels wrong about it. “What if the punishment is something different? What happens with the mark then?”
Yoongi stands up suddenly and Hoseok follows suit.
“We’ll figure it out once we know what the punishment is,” Yoongi smiles but it’s brief and he takes a step away from the stove. “I’ll get us some food for dinner. You should change your clothes. You have dried blood,” Yoongi gestures toward his whole body, “everywhere. My clothes are in that box.”
“You’re not going hunting, are you?” Hoseok asks, suddenly hating the prospect of being left alone in this tent.
“Of course not,” Yoongi huffs, looking amused. “It’s just a few things. I’ll be back in a blink, so you better get dressed quickly.”
“Okay,” Hoseok nods, and Yoongi leaves immediately.
Hoseok shrugs off his coat. It’s a rather old thing. His aunt made it out of mismatched fabrics that she salvaged and sewed together into a proper coat that has kept him warm since he was eighteen. Now blood has seeped into the sleeve. His pants are looking much worse. It can be washed out but his heart feels heavy at the thought of wearing these clothes again.
He approaches the wooden boxes and peeks inside them. He finds some kitchenware in one of them, then tools and an ax in another one, and Yoongi’s clothes are stored in the third one. There is not much other than some underwear and socks, a couple of undershirts, and a few loose pants that are clearly meant for summer and not winter. The inside of the tent is warm enough that he won’t get cold in summer clothes, so he picks out a gray shirt and black pants.
Once he’s done undressing and putting on Yoongi’s clothes, he smiles to himself a little, noticing their differences absentmindedly. The shirt is a little loose around his shoulders while the pants aren’t quite long enough, causing his ankles to peak out. He puts on socks too and rolls them up as high as he can.
The bite on his shoulder is still pulsing, though not as much as it did before. Hoseok pulls the shirt’s hem aside and tries to take a look at it but from this angle, he can only see the edge of it. He spots a metal water basin near the stove. He picks out a white rag from the kitchenware box and crouches down next to the basin, wetting the rag slightly. Flames are dancing inside the small stove, wood popping and cracking inside it and as Hoseok gently pats the mark, he wonders if this is how Yoongi has been spending his nights, cooking on a small stove in silence.
Yoongi clears his throat as he steps inside again and Hoseok turns to him. The older is carrying two baskets full of things: one has long yellow pepper, some round tomatoes, a stick of smoked sausage, and a small loaf of bread; the other is covered by a thick blanket, so Hoseok can’t tell what else is in it. Yoongi looks at him over his shoulder for a second — there is a sudden rush of contentment, conviction, comfort in Hoseok’s chest —, and then he puts the baskets down and walks over to the boxes.
“Would you like to help me cook?” Yoongi asks.
Hoseok puts the rag down and readjusts his shirt as he says, “Sure.”
Yoongi sits down next to him on the floor and hands Hoseok a cutting board and a knife, then reaches into the basket and gives Hoseok the tomatoes. He puts the pepper onto his smaller cutting board and starts working on their meal. Hoseok keeps his eyes on Yoongi for another second before he looks down at the tomatoes and starts cutting them too.
“Is this how you spend your evenings?” Hoseok asks conversationally. “Everyone is in their tents cooking dinner?”
“It is the norm,” Yoongi nods. “Dinner time is for families to spend some time together. You know I don’t have a family, so I cook and eat alone.”
“I’ve never thought about you eating,” Hoseok muses with a small smile as the stubborn tomato slices keep escaping from under his fingers. “Dinner is a community thing for us. The tribe has a cook and she makes our dinner every day, we just have to contribute to it.”
“So, you’re saying you’ve never cooked?” Yoongi asks warily, and Hoseok can feel him glancing over at his sad attempt at slicing up tomatoes.
Hoseok pouts at him. “I’m doing my best here. Besides, I'm a hunter, so I’m very good at cutting up raw meat. Just not vegetables.”
“It’s going to get a little mushy anyway, so I suppose it doesn’t matter how you cut it,” Yoongi says after averting his gaze once more. Hoseok looks at his perfectly cut pepper with envy. “If there is ever raw meat that needs to be handled, I’ll make sure to ask for your help.”
“You would be surprised how good I am at it,” Hoseok states confidently, fully believing that he would redeem his cutting skills if Yoongi ever handed him meat. “Did you know I got my own tent when I was sixteen? That’s how proficient I am at living on my own.”
“You only told me that around fifty times so far,” Yoongi chuckles, and Hoseok watches him as he picks up a small vial of oil from the basket and pours it into the already hot pot, followed by the pepper and then he takes the tomatoes pieces from Hoseok next.
“Others get their tent when they are eighteen,” Hoseok points out, his eyes glued to the way Yoongi stirs the vegetables with a wooden spoon.
“You’re an orphan. Is it surprising that you’re so self-sufficient?”
“I’m not completely an orphan.”
“Because a woman raised you? The woman who you call your aunt instead of your mother?”
“Well, she isn’t my mother, so…” Hoseok shrugs, watching Yoongi slice up the sausage next. It’s hard to explain to others the way he feels about his aunt. She might’ve found him and taken him in but she never truly acted like she was his mother. She is kind enough and gave attention to him when she could but she’s also been inattentive even when Hoseok was a child.
Hoseok loved to wander around the tribe at first and then he loved to wander outside of it. He’s always remained in the human territory but still, he knows that a mother would get so worried if her child were to wander away. His aunt never even noticed when he was away. He wasn’t upset about it because due to her absent-mindedness, he met Yoongi by the creek. Then they kept meeting there regularly for most of their lives.
She is an important woman in his life but she is not his mother.
“You’re an orphan too. You know it’s not easy to find a family,” Hoseok says eventually after Yoongi put the sausage into the pot too alongside some spices and a bit of water from the basin.
“It is hard,” Yoongi admits, placing the lid on top of the pot and then finally turns his body toward Hoseok. His eyes flicker over his body, then he says, “Won’t she notice that you’re not back for dinner?”
“I don’t think so,” Hoseok shakes his head. He can’t find it within himself to feel bad that his aunt won’t even notice his absence because he’d rather sit across Yoongi in his tent than be anywhere else despite the reality of his situation. He thinks he would pick Yoongi over anyone.
“And… are you feeling okay after what happened?” Yoongi asks carefully.
“I’m not sure my brain has really caught up with everything that happened,” Hoseok confesses, lifting his eyes to the top of the tent. “I wish I didn’t fire that damn arrow. I wish I had chosen to hunt on a different part. I wish… I wish for a lot of things.”
“I understand that.”
“I think Hajun wanted to attack me after it happened but Kyusung nudged him away,” says Hoseok. “I’m grateful to him for that but… I don't know. I didn’t really think about anything after that except you. I needed to get to you.”
Yoongi’s gaze is unwavering, his chest rises and falls slowly, and he looks more like a wooden statue than a person. Hoseok would like to take a peek into his heart to see what he feels and thinks.
“I’m glad you came to me,” Yoongi says quietly after a moment of silence.
“I’ll tell you if I’m glad once this is over,” Hoseok jokes, raising his eyebrows, and Yoongi smiles at that, fondly rolling his eyes. It feels easy to exist so close to each other. He had no idea it would feel this easy. Hoseok looks around the tent with a sigh then says, “You know it’s weird that you don’t have chairs and a table in here.”
“Don’t start criticizing my home now,” Yoongi groans lightheartedly. “I prefer sitting on the ground, so what?”
“Nothing. Just an observation,” Hoseok says offhandedly.
They keep talking for a while until their meal is ready, then Yoongi takes out two bowls and tears the bread into half for them to share and they eat quietly on the floor. Hoseok is delighted to learn that Yoongi is a decent cook and he makes sure to drop a comment about that. It feels a little weird to be eating dinner without a lot of people around but Hoseok secretly thinks that he could get used to this too.
After dinner, Yoongi tasks him with rinsing off the dishes, which Hoseok happily does, but he keeps his eyes on the older as Yoongi pulls out the big blanket from the second basket and then another one and another one. His arms are completely full as he climbs into the sleeping area and disappears entirely for a few minutes.
Hoseok busies himself with folding dirty clothes and coats and arranging them in a pile near the entrance door until Yoongi comes back out again.
When he does, Hoseok says, “These clothes need to be washed and I can’t go anywhere in them,” pointing at his current clothing.
“Don’t worry. I’ll get you some winter clothes tomorrow,” Yoongi says reassuringly as Hoseok walks closer to him. “Are you ready to go to bed now?”
Hoseok nods, and Yoongi signals for him to go ahead. Hoseok has to step up into the sleeping area as it seems elevated from the ground to protect them from the cold. The space is big enough for two people to sleep in, but he is a little shocked by the sheer amount of blankets covering every bit of the floor from one corner to the other. Yoongi definitely didn’t need to bring more.
Yoongi climbs inside after him as Hoseok sits down on an incredibly warm-looking blanket. He never goes cold in his own home but feels like sleeping here will be a much different experience. He’s going to be so warm and Yoongi is going to be right next to him.
Hoseok’s heart stops when he notices that Yoongi is in the process of taking off his shirt.
His voice comes out weird when he asks, “What are you doing?”
“I’m going to shift and sleep in my wolf form just to be sure,” Yoongi tells him while Hoseok is fighting the urge to let his eyes wander to the other’s chest and stomach. It’s probably the hardest fight of his life.
“You think someone would attack us while we sleep?”
“No, but it’s better to be safe than sorry,” Yoongi says matter-of-factly, his hand pausing at the button of his pants. He tilts his head to the side. “Do you have everything that you need?”
Hoseok nods jerkily. “Yup.”
“Good. Then lay down and close your eyes while I do my thing,” Yoongi instructs. Hoseok does as he says and gets under the blanket, closing his eyes shut even though his curiosity hasn’t been sated at all.
“Are you shy, hyung?” Hoseok says, his ears focused on every rustle or noise that Yoongi is making so close to him.
Yoongi's laugh comes out airy and light. “Why are you asking? You want to see me naked?”
“You told me to close my eyes,” Hoseok says, then takes a deep breath, preparing himself for uttering the biggest lie of his life. “I don’t care what you look like naked.”
“Then why does it matter if I’m shy or not?”
Hoseok blows out an annoyed breath through his mouth, his cheeks puffing up in the process. “It doesn’t matter. It was just a question.”
He doesn’t receive a reply to that but he keeps his eyes closed until he feels a wet nudge against his hand. His eyes fly open in an instant. His breathing picks up as he takes in the wolf that looms above him. His fur is mostly gray except for his ears and a line on his nose which is covered in black fur. Suddenly, the spacious sleeping area doesn’t feel so roomy anymore.
When he doesn’t react, the wolf nudges his hand harder this time, lifting it with his snout and lowering himself on the floor while placing his head on Hoseok’s chest. Carefully Hoseok strokes the wolf’s nose then the top of his head, and the wolf’s eyes fall shut immediately.
“Woah. You’re pretty cute, I think,” Hoseok breathes. He’s never seen Yoongi as a wolf before. The older has always been very careful to keep their worlds separate despite their friendship. The wolf lets out a huff as though he’s annoyed, but it only makes Hoseok smile. “Yeah, pretty cute.” He brings his hand down and pats him one last time. “Good night.”
Hoseok closes his eyes, and this time he feels it much stronger than before.
Determination, fondness, contentment.
Hoseok stirs awake when it’s still dark. He feels the weight on his chest and as he gets comfortable to go back to sleep again, his hand almost instinctively reaches to feel the wolf’s fur but instead, he touches silky hair. His eyes fly open when his hand travels down Yoongi’s neck and down, down to his naked back. His skin isn’t exactly cold but he’s not warm either. He must’ve accidentally shifted back to his human form while he slept, and Hoseok can’t let him sleep like that.
He gently shakes his shoulder, and whispers, “Hyung, wake up.”
He can’t see much in the darkness, except for the general shape of his friend’s body, and it makes his heart churn because Yoongi is doing so much for him. Everything that Hoseok asked for and more. It almost makes Hoseok feel guilty all over again.
Yoongi makes a soft questioning sound, barely lifting his head from Hoseok’s chest.
“You’re going to freeze like this,” Hoseok explains, and Yoongi makes another sleepy sound like he doesn’t know what’s happening around him. Hoseok grabs his wrist and starts pulling him with one hand and lifting the blanket with the other one. “Come here.”
“But ‘m naked,” Yoongi mutters, but he doesn’t resist Hoseok. He slides under the blanket easily, like he was supposed to be there from the beginning.
“I don’t care,” Hoseok whispers as Yoongi lays his head on his shoulder. Hoseok wraps his arms around him, trying to warm him up as much as he can. The last thing he wants is for Yoongi to get sick because of him. “Go back to sleep. It’s early.”
“You too,” Yoongi murmurs against the fabric of his shirt. His breathing evens out soon after, falling back into his slumber, and Hoseok goes back to sleep once Yoongi’s skin feels warmer under his palm, too.
Hoseok wakes up to birds chirping and a warm breath fanning against his nape. As he becomes more lucid, the more clearly he starts sensing the body that curls around his, the arm thrown over his side, his shirt getting caught between fingers, and the nose that moves slowly up to his hairline. The deep inhale has him blinking his eyes open and everything that happened yesterday rushes back to him.
He’s in Yoongi’s tent. In his sleeping area. In his arms.
“Hyung?” Hoseok asks, voice weak and rough from sleep. He knows that Yoongi is awake too but he still calls him like he’s unsure because this is all out of the ordinary for them. Probably the furthest thing from a regular morning.
“Hm?” Yoongi hums. Hoseok was expecting him to realize the situation that they are in and put some distance between them but if anything, Yoongi holds him a little tighter, his nose pressing against his hair a bit harder.
Everyone in his tribe learns what they deem as basic wolf knowledge, so he knows what scenting is. He may have heard about it but he’s never seen it, much less experienced it. Yet, he thinks this is probably what this is. It has to be.
“Good morning,” Hoseok whispers, feeling oddly out of his element. He feels so awkward and unsure, but a certain excitement that doesn’t belong to him throbs beneath his ribs. Yoongi mumbles something incoherent, a jumbled-up good morning most likely, but his lips press against Hoseok’s neck.
It sends a shiver down Hoseok’s spine. Part of him feels mortified because Yoongi must’ve felt it but the other traitorous part of him very much welcomes whatever this is. It’s not unwelcome or uncomfortable.
Yoongi moves down until his nose is gently pressed against Hoseok’s shoulder where his shirt covers the bite mark. There’s another inhale and a pleased hum from Yoongi, and Hoseok wonders if he should do or say something.
“You smell so good,” Yoongi says, and he sounds positively delirious. His voice is warm and gentle and Hoseok thinks he could get lost in it.
“Do I?” A burst of embarrassed laughter slips past Hoseok’s lips. He hardly had the opportunity to shower yesterday, but he still says, “Thank you.”
Yoongi’s fingers uncurl and they press against Hoseok’s stomach as his mouth moves against the crock of his neck, “Yeah, you smell like me.”
Hoseok wishes those words only sent down another shiver down his spine, but it’s much worse this time. All the nerves in this body light up suddenly and warmth starts rushing downward so quickly that he goes lightheaded for a second.
He needs all his strength to turn around, and not grab his friend’s hand and shove it down his pants. This air between them, around them — this heat is dangerous, and Hoseok scrambles to come up with something to dissolve the situation. Looking at Yoongi’s peaceful face, eyes closed while his arms are still holding him close, is not helping by any means.
“It’s strange, isn’t it?” Hoseok tries but he fears that his voice will give him away. That Yoongi just knows what Hoseok wants. “That there’s no creek between us. Isn’t that strange that there is nothing between us, hyung?”
“I think your clothes are still between us,” Yoongi says, refusing to open his eyes. The sudden realization that his friend still isn’t wearing any clothes hits him again, making his cheeks flush.
“And I think that you’re stupid.” Hoseok resorts to a weak insult that makes Yoongi huff out a laugh. He’s not used to being flustered by anyone, not even Yoongi. Even if the older doesn’t want to admit it, in some way this is all very strange.
“Is it okay if I take advantage of it?” Yoongi asks, his lips are still a little curled up but his tone is a lot more serious.
“Of?”
“Of the fact that there is no creek between us?”
Hoseok stares at him, knowing that if he would’ve been a little more logical he would say that it’s not okay. That they should wait and see how this all plays out. However, his heart has no doubts or fears when it comes to Yoongi. It’s always been like that, so despite everything, his reply comes out easily, maybe a little foolishly too.
“It’s okay.”
Yoongi leans in and presses his nose to Hoseok’s neck again and Hoseok lets him, letting his hand rest on his friend’s naked shoulder, his thumb moving back and forth. They stay like that for a while. It’s hard to find an escape route from a situation that Hoseok doesn’t truly want to escape from. He could only dream of being this close to Yoongi but there is still a part of him that’s too worried to let himself go and enjoy whatever he has with Yoongi here.
“But it’s strange, isn’t it?” Hoseok whispers after a while, and Yoongi moves away from him, turning on his back. He runs a hand down his face before his eyes finally open with a heavy sigh. Hoseok eyes him curiously.
“Yes, but it feels right. Don’t you think so?” Yoongi’s head turns toward him, a small smile playing on his lips but his eyes seem a bit guarded, closed off in ways that Hoseok isn’t so used to.
“It does feel right,” Hoseok agrees, not keen on lying about how he feels about their suddenly gained proximity. They share a smile that shakes Hoseok’s heart a little, then abruptly, Yoongi shoots up into a sitting position, all of his back suddenly on display in front of Hoseok.
“I have to go to Jaejong,” Yoongi announces, and Hoseok blinks at him, confused.
“Why?”
“I have to apologize.”
Hoseok pushes himself up with a hand, a frown deepening on his forehead as he asks, “Apologize? Why do you need to apologize to him?”
“I’ve been breaking rules for years and now he knows. The least I could do is to apologize for going behind the pack’s back and…” Yoongi takes a deep breath, peeking at Hoseok over his shoulder. “I’m hoping that he’ll see that I’m serious about you. About us. If he believes that then hopefully it affects his decision and he’ll let us both off easier. I have to try.”
“I thought you wanted to bait him into punishing me through the incomplete bond,” says Hoseok. He’s not sure what the point of apologizing is at this point. There is no easy way to apologize for hiding a forbidden friendship. He may not know Jaejong personally but he can imagine a possibility where it just makes him more upset about the entire situation.
Yoongi shrugs. “I’m trying to complicate the situation. That’s all.”
“Well, if you think it worth the try,” Hoseok says, trailing off. He can’t exactly ask Yoongi not to leave when he’s doing something for both their sake’s but he wishes Yoongi would stay. “When are you coming back?”
“As soon as I can,” Yoongi’s expression softens and he turns toward him with his whole body. “There should be some leftover bread and sausage for you in the basket, and I’ll send my friends with fresh winter clothing. You don’t have to worry about anything.”
“Okay, hyung,” Hoseok says, though his wish stays the same. Yoongi moves toward him, a hand reaching for him and then he stops midair as though he’s having doubts. It only lasts a heartbeat because Yoongi cups the back of his neck and their forehead and the tip of their noses meet. Yoongi’s eyes are closed but Hoseok stares wide-eyed, unsure of what’s happening.
Yoongi pulls back abruptly and averts his gaze. “Can you close your eyes again? I need to get dressed.”
Hoseok flops back onto his back, arms thrown wide open. He wonders. “Are you going to do this a lot?”
“Do what? Get naked?” Yoongi laughs, and Hoseok can hear the sound of fabric rustling. The atmosphere in the tent shifts entirely to something lighter and fun.
“Make me close my eyes,” he clarifies. “You can’t even be sure that I’m not stealing peaks.”
“You’re not the type of person to do that,” Yoongi says, and Hoseok can almost see him shaking his head. “I know that you wouldn’t do that after I asked you to close your eyes. Not even if you were curious.”
“I’m not curious,” Hoseok fibs. Yoongi moves and suddenly warm breaths dance across Hoseok’s cheek.
“I wouldn’t be mad if you were.”
Hoseok opens his eyes but Yoongi is already gone.
He tries to stop the smile from spreading across his cheeks, his eyes flickering around the small area, seeing shadows of his friend everywhere in the small space. He almost wants to roll around on the blankets to soak in this energy, these strange moments, and Yoongi’s scent that’s sticking everywhere.
Instead, he sits up and slowly climbs out of the sleeping area, approaching the basket near the stove. Just like Yoongi said, he finds some leftover bread and sausage. He picks them up and sits down on the mess of blankets on the floor. It’s unusual for him to just sit around and have breakfast in peace. He’s more used to early mornings and hushed discussions of what the tribe needs and riding out with nothing but his trusty bow strapped to his back. The bow that he will probably not get back after yesterday.
In the absence of Yoongi, Hoseok has some time to better assess his feelings as he munches on his breakfast. Yesterday, he shot a wolf but now he knows that his name was Juwon. It's unsettling and stomach-churning to think about his taking a life on accident. Getting stuck in wolf territory is the closest thing a human can get to being in hell on Earth. He deserves a punishment even if he didn’t do it on purpose, even if those guys broke laws and walked into forbidden territory, and yet, he hopes for a gentle penalty.
The last thing that he wants is to lose the bond that he has with Yoongi. In the middle of this mayhem, they have something good here. It’s in the process of growing tall, something hanging off its branches, ready to ripen despite unfortunate times. In some ways, they have always been unfortunate. Unfortunate friends. Unfortunate companions divided by differences that fall out of their control. Yoongi cannot become a human and Hoseok cannot turn into a wolf. Their genetics won’t comply with their wishes, though Hoseok wouldn’t ever want Yoongi to change, nor would he want to change himself, and for the first time in their lives, they are free.
Free to touch.
Free to linger.
Free to exist impossibly close.
They held each other and the world didn’t fall apart. Yoongi’s arm curled around his and it didn’t feel wrong. Hoseok warmed him up and nothing got worse. They can’t be the first ones to experience this but Hoseok certainly feels like he’s discovering something new in Yoongi’s embrace.
It’s silly because he knew that he liked Yoongi as soon as he knew what it meant to love someone romantically. He recognized it instantly and hasn’t let go of the feeling since. Maybe he should’ve but there is something about wanting someone unattainable that always made his heart yearn so painfully and yet so beautifully. He can’t imagine his heart wanting anyone the way it wants Yoongi.
After Yoongi bit him, claimed him, half-mated him, it felt like something had awoken in his chest. Something that shouldn’t be there but is anyway. Hoseok thinks about those emotions that shine right next to him. It started after the bite and they all seem to lead toward Yoongi. When the older shifted, those emotions only got stronge—
“Hello? Yoongi-hyung’s mate, are you in there?” A deep voice sings, startling Hoseok out of his thoughts. There are two pairs of feet approaching the tent, and Hoseok pushes himself up from the blankets, cleaning the crumbs off his clothes.
“He has a name, Taehyung-ah,” another man chides, his voice sounding gentle though a little displeased. “I think humans prefer to be called by their names.”
“Oh? How many humans have you met in your life?” The first person asks, not unkindly. “Maybe they prefer to be called by their mate’s name, or something.”
“Humans don’t have mates,” the second person huffs, then adds quieter, “I think.”
“We don’t, and we do prefer to be called by our real name,” Hoseok says as he sticks his head out through the entrance. He doesn’t want to needlessly expose himself. “Hi! Just call me Hoseok please.”
He takes in the two men in front of him, one taller than the other. They are both wearing earthy colors, a mix of deep green and brown. The taller one has short spiky hair and a sturdy form. He’s holding a bunch of clothing in his arms. The other’s hair is a bit longer, he has a mole on his nose, and a wide, boxy smile. They both look at him curiously like this is the first time they’ve seen a human in their lives, which Hoseok seriously doubts, but this is probably the closest they’ve ever been to one.
“Yoongi-hyung sent us. I’m Namjoon,” says the tallest one, then points at the other one. “This is Taehyung.”
Taehyung lifts his hand in a greeting. “Hi. Can we come in?”
“Sure, come in,” Hoseok says, moving back into the tent. He knew that Yoongi had friends but he never spent time thinking about them before.
They come in one by one like they are used to walking through the entrance. The image of Yoongi’s evening changes in his mind; now he imagines the three of them together, sitting around the stove and talking until they get tired. It’s a much friendlier image.
“He told me that you need new clothing, so I brought you this.” Namjoon steps closer to him and hands him the pile that he’s been holding onto. Hoseok takes it from him and runs his hand over the warm fabric. It’s just what he needs.
“Thank you. I appreciate it,” Hoseok says, his eyes shifting to Taehyung who is still staring at him curiously. It’s not the most comfortable to be looked at that way but he still prefers this to being grabbed and dragged by a bunch of people.
Taehyung’s lips jut out as he asks, “How did Yoongi-hyung hide you for so long?”
“There wasn’t much to hide. I had never stepped foot on wolf territory before,” Hoseok explains. “We talked to each other from a distance.”
“For how long?” This time it’s Namjoon asking him.
“Since he was seven,” Hoseok replies curtly, turning around to put the clothes down in front of the sleeping area. He’ll change once the others leave.
“Hyung is twenty-three now, so that’s like—”
“Sixteen years,” Namjoon finishes instead of Taehyung and when Hoseok turns back to them, he sees the prolonged look that the two of them share. It makes him wonder what that means. They might think it’s silly to be so attached to a friendship that is forbidden. Hoseok wouldn’t blame them for thinking that.
“I had no idea. Did you?” Taehyung asks and it’s clear from his expression that he thinks this is all mind-boggling.
“Zero idea. His being away is normal because of his role in the pack so…” Namjoon’s voice trails off, then his eyebrows twitch. “Do you think he chose to patrol the perimeter of our territory, so he had easier access to his human?”
Hoseok presses his lips together, trying to bite back the thick layer of delightfulness that spreads at being referred to as Yoongi’s human. He never thought about it but he knows that Yoongi must’ve taken on the task of partoling because of him. They both took every opportunity to see each other.
“Of course, he did.” Taehyung looks back at Hoseok. “He’s not stupid. He must have something nice with Hoseok-ssi.”
“We support you, by the way,” Namjoon says, shifting in his spot. “They went to human territory and found out why nobody does that.”
“Thank you. I hope your leaders will see that too,” Hoseok says, feeling a little warm on the inside. “Though I’m sure not everybody thinks like you do.”
“There has been a lot of tension between our people but I don’t think that means we should get stuck in the mentality that this other group of people are inherently wrong,” Namjoon says encouragingly, The way he phrases it makes it all sound logical but Hoseok knows that the reality is a lot different than that.
“It’s pretty incredible that we found out that one of us was sheltering a friendship with you. I think it’s inspiring,” Taehyung adds with an impressed expression as he shoves his hands into his pockets. “It changes what we thought is normal for our people.”
“Could someone like Hajun change his mind?” Hoseok prompts, raising an eyebrow. The way Taehyung’s face falls is more than sufficient answer.
“No. Probably not someone like him but our leader isn’t harsh,” Namjoon shakes his head, and each of his words give Hoseok a bit more hope. “He knows loss and joy. I think he’ll judge you fairly.”
“Yes, and Yoongi is making sure of it,” Taehyung grins, wide and toothy.
Hoseok already misses his presence. “How long will this apology last exactly?”
“Once our leader got tired of hyung’s scent stinking up the entrance of his tent. So, it will take a while.” is what Namjoon says, and Hoseok feels a little taken aback, concerned, and displeased all at once. ‘A while’ doesn’t sound good to him.
“Why does an apology last that long?” Hoseok mumbles.
“It’s not a spoken apology.”
Hoseok’s eyes widen just slightly. “Then what is it?”
“He has to kneel until the pack leader sends him away,” Taehyung explains.
That feels so wrong to Hoseok at once. To do that all alone — that’s not something that Yoongi should do when it was Hoseok who caused this mess for both of them. Determination fills him up immediately as the two others blink at him in shock.
“Tell me where he is.” Hoseok turns around and picks up new clothes from the floor, holding them tightly to his body.
“Er, if you walk down the path, it should lead you to it. It’s the biggest tent, so you can’t miss it,” Namjoon says hesitantly. “But what are you planning on doing?”
“I don’t know, but I’m not letting him do this alone.” Hoseok looks back at them over his shoulder. “I don’t mean to be rude but I’d like to change my clothes now. I’m very grateful for this and I’m glad we met but…”
“We get it,” Taehyung says, lifting his hand in surrender. “That’s your mate. We get it, really.”
Part of Hoseok wants to argue that that’s not exactly how he sees Yoongi. That his feelings are strong for him but it’s all a bit more complicated right now and he doesn’t even want to think about that now. Not when Yoongi is kneeling in the snow.
“I’m sure we’ll see you soon anyway,” Namjoon says easily, and then quickly leaves after waving him goodbye. Hoseok doesn’t hesitate to strip out of Yoongi's clothes.