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Subaru isn’t in a great state when he wakes up. He rubs his face, confused and dazed as a headache throbs through his skull. He had been— training? No, Beako and him had been talking before, so why…?
He stirs, feeling sluggish and not all the way there. Subaru raises his head, then blinks. Once his gaze comes into focus, it meets an unfamiliar golden ceiling. “I don’t know this ceili— no, this is an old gag at this point.”
It’s a weird color to paint a room, but ranks a solid nine out of ten in the list of things to see when one wakes up in an unknown place. A lot more welcoming than a cell or a strange carriage, that’s for sure.
Still, though the pillows are comfortable, Subaru would very much want to know where he is. "Where?" He mutters, though it comes out more similar to a ‘veeregh’ than anything else.
"Oh, you are awake." Emilia's face— well, mainly her chin—enters his field of view. It's such a pretty chin, too. Not too pointy nor curvy, white as snow. Perfect as only EMT can be.
Not a pillow but Emilia’s lap, then. Subaru shifts, and meets her purple eyes with his own. Emilia raises an eyebrow, the corner of her mouth downwards. Even when she stares at him in such a menacing way, it ranks a million—no, a bazillion out of ten in the list of things to see when you wake up in an unknown place.
“Mhmmm… Emilia-tan… so comfy…”
"—Maybe we should call Felix to check on Subaru after all." Crusch's voice comes from his left, cutting through Subaru’s daydreaming and sobering his brain in an instant. “He doesn’t sound well.”
Subaru squeals as he leaps out of Emilia's lap in such a rush he almost trips with her shoes and falls down on top of her lap again. To his horror, his gaze doesn't just land in Crusch. All four candidates, each seated in a couch surrounding the coffee table, stare at him with different degrees of annoyance. "W—when did you all get here?!” What was Emilia thinking, giving him a lap pillow in front of… them?!
Felt, clad in the most obnoxious yellow and red velvet gown Subaru has ever seen—Reinhard getting that to happen was a lot more concerning than Subaru’s whereabouts—groans. "Great, and now Subaru has amnesia. I hope Julius is happy now, Anastasia.”
“I hope for the same!” Anastasia’s eyes seemed to sparkle like gold. “Gettin’ rid of the competition for me, how knightly of him.”
Felt glares daggers at her before turning towards Subaru. If looks could kill, Return By Death would have been triggered that very second. “He challenged you to a duel. Said that if you truly loved Emilia you should hit your head against a wall until you fainted." Her explanation, dry as the Auguria sand dunes, is of little help to him. “So you did it, of course.”
Subaru blinks. His lips part while his brain tries to process Felt’s words.
Okay… It's not that Subaru doesn't think he wouldn’t bang his head against a wall just because of a challenge. Subaru would like to think he isn’t that dumb but— maybe. He is self aware enough to know he would rise up to any challenge… depending on the circumstances. The problem is that Julius also knows he is that childish, so he wouldn’t say something like that even as a joke.
Subaru turns his gaze back to Emilia, but rather than refusing Felt's statement, her lips curl into an amused smile. "Right." He takes a seat next to Emilia. Maybe he did hit his head and is now seeing things. Better not to argue until he is no longer concussed and the world starts making sense again. "’Kay. Where am I now, then?"
Anastasia perks up, a toothy grin on her face. "At my manor."
Subaru raises his eyebrows before turning to study the room. Aside from the golden paint that he is now beginning to suspect is actual gold with rococo-like ornaments, clearly designed to impress and awe at first sight, there are several paintings depicting a fight between a dragon and a silver haired half elf decorating the walls. It’s a surprisingly European style he would have expected to see more from a Lugunican Noblefamily than a merchant.
"—but it's also yours. It's ours ," Anastasia continues.
Subaru’s thread of thought stops. “Huh?”
Felt curses and leans back into her chair, raising her hands in visible exasperation. "Not this shit again, it’s not yours—”
“—but it will be mine soon, and the day it becomes mine, it will become everyone's, for I will seize all means of production. Anastasia Marx will give to the people what belongs to the people!"
“For the last time—” Felt slams the tea table with both her fists as she stands up, glaring holes at Anastasia. Subaru cringes from the noise of cutlery and cups clicking each other,” —this isn't your manor, and it will never be. It's Astrea's!” Felt’s scowl grows deeper.
Emilia sighs and leans close to him so as to whisper in his ear. "Subaru, gawking is impolite, so shut your mouth." His lips close with an audible click. "Just how badly did you hit your head?"
"Marx?!" Subaru whispers back. He can accept Felt wearing fancy clothes and Emilia’s expression being a little scary, but Anastasia having the surname Marx?! "Shouldn't it be Hoshin!?"
Emilia furrows her brow. "No? She adopted her name after the famous philosopher that was born beyond the Great Waterfall, yet ended up here 400 years ago. You already knew that, Subaru."
Subaru just stares, speechless. “Huh..." So he hit his head. And now Anastasia is a communist. Logical action and reaction event.
"You won't give a single thing to anyone," Felt snaps, ignoring Subaru's exchange with Emilia. "A foreigner like you shouldn’t be able to own a thing here anyway.”
Subaru grabs Emilia’s cup, then raises it to his face so as to hide his grimace.
"—if anything, this place belongs to me, for everything belongs to the King and I—” Felt points at herself,” —have Royal Blood." The ‘unlike you,’ goes unsaid.
"It belongs to the people!"
“Well… If we are serious about this discussion,” Crusch clears her throat. Both her manners and clothes seem similar to how she was when they first met, but Subaru can’t be fooled. With how Felt and Anastasia are acting, he is just waiting for the other shoe to drop. "Everything belongs to those that have power—therefore, the Divine Dragon.” She shrugs. “As it should, obviously.”
And the shoe drops. The rest of the table rolls their eyes.
Priscilla opens her fan and hides half her face behind it."You ignorant fools." Subaru blinks. He had completely forgotten she was in the room too. "Instead of trying to gain power for yourselves, we should let the commoners decide it. Let Democracy shine, as the world was made for their convenience."
Crusch, Felt and Anastasia share a look. Subaru doesn’t need to read their minds to know that the only thing they all agree on is that Priscilla's opinion needs to be discarded.
“Lady Emilia” Anastasia gives the tiniest of nods in Subaru’s direction. "Subaru ain’t feeling well yet? He keeps makin’ funny faces behind your cup.”
Emilia’s eyes—so similar to the ones he remembers, yet with a glacial glint he never imagined associating with her—bore down on him with concern. "Maybe banging his head affected him more than I first thought,” she taps his nose one, two times, and his heart skips just as many beats. “We could try hitting Subaru again and see if it fixes it.”
“H—huh?” Subaru’s free hand twitches. The closer Emilia gets to his face, the more he appreciates the delicate shape of her lips, the sweet perfume from her hair, and his cheeks feel the warmth of her breath. This scary version of Emilia has no right to look so attractive when talking about giving him physical damage. "W—wait a moment, Emilia—"
He gulps. Bad thoughts, reaaally bad thoughts. His heart belongs to his kind, gentle Emilia-tan. He opens his mouth again, but before he can get another word out, there is a sharp knock at the door. Emilia freezes, glancing toward the sound.
—his chance. Taking advantage of the distraction, Subaru slips out of the couch and Emilia’s side. “Come in!”
At his call, the dining room’s entrance parts open and Reinhard walks in, dipping his head in greeting. Subaru has never been happier to catch sight of his familiar mop of red hair. “I see Subaru has woken up.”
Subaru beams. “Reinhard! My friend, my pal, my colleague, my hero, I think I need some fresh air.” Pretending he doesn’t see the obvious pout Emilia sends his way, he walks to the door, grabs Reinhard by his shoulders, and leads them both out of the room.
"...Subaru, are you okay?” Reinhard stops walking the moment they get out of hearing range and into the garden. Of course he would realize Subaru was using him as an excuse to leave. Even in an alternative dimension, Reinhard is still Reinhard—and judging by the sword at his hip, the Sword Saint.
“Am I okay?” Subaru folds his arms, trying to look unbothered but failing. "No, Emilia looked like she was three seconds away from stepping on me."
"I see..." Reinhard’s worried smile falters.
“—and I just realized I'm very much into that— which is terrible because she is supposed to be an angel."
Reinhard tilts his head. “You are always calling her your Angel Lilith," despite the matter-of-fact tone, confusion laces his voice.
Lilith, like the evil religious figure? Subaru just stares. "That's not the praise you think it is."
Reinhard frowns, and for once ever since he woke up, Subaru is not the most puzzled person in the room. "Maybe I should have my father order Felix to come, head wounds can be extremely dangerous."
"You have a dad —? Never mind.” Everyone has a dad, Reinhard’s mom couldn’t have reproduced via mitosis. And as curious as he is about it, finding out what is going on is much more important. “Wait, Felix isn't here?"
Reinhard shakes his head.
Ferris never separates from Crusch. "But Crusch is here?"
"Exactly."
Subaru takes a deep breath. He should have expected that change. “That’s fine, at least Felix is still a healer."
"Why would he not be a healer?"
"Because apparently the biggest merchant I know is now a communist, Crusch has a better relationship with the Divine Dragon than with Felix, Felt is pro monarchy, Priscilla is reasonable—"
" Reasonable might not be the best adjective to describe Lady Priscilla,” Reinhard winces. His face screams years of suffering and pain from dealing with her temperament. “She actually kicked a child down the stairs yesterday."
"That's worse!” Subaru throws his hands up in the air. “She is supposed to only be patient with children! It’s like the world turned upside down, everyone is exactly the opposite of what they used to be—"
No, not everyone . Subaru furrows his brows. Reinhard enquired about his health— just like the Reinhard he knows would have done. Aside from his friendly attitude, both his expression and spotless white uniform are as he remembers; the very definition of perfection. Taking a deep breath, Subaru narrows his eyes.
“—except you." As the realization sinks in, his blood turns to ice. Somehow, despite Emilia, Julius, Anastasia, Crush, Felt and Priscilla becoming their total opposite, Reinhard managed to stay the same. "...You aren't secretly evil or something, are you?"
Emilia had actually considered hitting his head to help him, so she had to care about him, even if in her special, dommy mommy way that Subaru would never admit out loud is super hot. She wouldn't have left her alone with Reinhard if he was a well known evil individual.
Reinhard blinks. "Why would you ask that?"
"The Reinhard I remember is openly kind. The goodest boy in Lugunica. The totally opposite to that is—" Subaru shrugs, “—secretly evil." Okay, no. Perhaps his reasoning is a little far-fetched, but why would whatever power that affected everyone skip Reinhard and only Reinhard? It doesn’t make any sense.
Rather than calling Subaru crazy, Reinhard puts a thoughtful expression on his face. "If my hypothetical counterpart is exactly as I am, how do you know he isn't the secretly evil one instead of me?" He sounds so honest, playing along with his dumb theory.
A pause. “That's… that’s what a secretly evil person would say to confuse me."
"That's also what an openly kind person would say. No one wants to be thought of as evil," Reinhard replies, a gentle smile tugging at his lips.
Subaru's mouth curls down in distaste. Touché. "Perhaps you are right, but just in case I want to ask—you are still Felt's knight, aren’t you?"
Felix not getting along with Crusch is just as unthinkable as Reinhard not being Felt’s knight— and therefore, equally reasonable, considering one has already been proved as true. Reinhard not being involved with the Royal Selection could mean he doesn’t care about Lugunica’s fate, and he could say that’s secretly evil...maybe.
"Well, she is part of the kingdom, so—"
“Nope,” Subaru presses on, “I meant her personal knight for the Royal Selection."
"I don’t think I’m able to follow.” Reinhard scratches his chin and glares at the grass next to them speculatively before looking back to Subaru. “What is this Royal Selection you mention?"
That's it. This version of Reinhard is a prankster and is messing with him. He has to. "The reason these five are even meeting today? They were talking about it. I heard them!"
Reinhard frowns. “They are here because of their monthly tea party. I don’t know what you heard, but it is unrelated to any Selection.”
“Now—now, I finally get it,” Subaru snorts. Oh, this one was hilarious. “So the difference between you and the other Reinhard is that you actually have a sense of humor.” He sighs and gifts Reinhard a winning smile. “You are hilarious, evil Reinhard, but I know the truth. Anastasia said she was going to take control of the government.”
“...Anastasia Marx sees revolution as a necessity for communism. She is always talking about giving the people what belongs to the people.” He pauses. “I’d never allow any revolution though, if it isn’t obvious.”
Subaru makes a face. “Good excuse, but she even called me her rival.”
“Subaru, you are a member of Her Majesty Capella’s Royal Knights and what Anastasia would classify as a bourgeois. Of course you are her enemy.”
“Now that excuse isn’t even good, because I’m not a—”
—his mouth closes with an audible click. He stares at his clothes. A white uniform and a matching white cape with a black shirt and a sword attached to the hip. Subaru blinks. Then raises his hands to rub his eyes and make the hallucination go away— but no, the clothes don’t blur and become his normal tracksuit. “ A Knight Uniform?!” Subaru squeals, loud enough even the birds chirping next to them fly away.
Capella’s Royal Knights, Reinhard said. He knows what a Royal Knight is, but the name Capella doesn't ring any bells. “Capella?”
“Oh, that might be a problem,” Reinhard’s expression finally shifts into one of worry. "You don't remember Her Majesty Capella Lugunica at all? She knighted you just a year ago, shortly after you arrived in Lugunica."
Subaru feels dizzy, and he doesn’t think it has anything to do with the tea he drank from Emilia’s cup just five minutes before. He is someone’s knight, just not Emilia’s. Lugunica has a Queen called Capella, who is also an actual member of the Royal Family. “...But, I was in Emilia’s lap, if I’m not her knight then why—”
Dread sinks into the pit of his stomach. After how much he worked to be Emilia’s knight, he can’t just lose his position like this!
“Emilia and you have been dating from the very first moment you two met.” Reinhard misinterpreted his question, but his reply still makes his heart skip a beat. “She will not take your amnesia well.”
Subaru gapes. “Emilia and I— we…? Here we actually…?”
Before Subaru can say anything, the garden’s door bursts open. Reinhard and Subaru both jerk in surprise, turning to see a serious looking Emilia standing in the doorway. Her face pale, her eyes wide with shock, and an ice mace materializing in her hand.
“I heard everything,” she says, voice shaky, as she steps into the garden. “It’s safe to say you don’t remember anything about us?”
"There is nothing safe about you at the moment, Emilia-tan,” Subaru blurts out. The word ‘us’ repeats like a broken record inside his head. There is an ‘us’ between dommy mommy Emilia and him— or well, this world’s him. Emilia balances the ice maze with her right hand.
"Why~ thank you!" Emilia beams, sounding like her usual bright self for the first time since he woke up— a second later, her expression shifts into a serious one once again. "Now Subaru, please stand still as I hit your head and fix this."
Ah, so that’s why she materialized the ice mace.
Reinhard moves to stand between them. "I must digress, that sounds terribly dangerous, Lady Emilia."
Emilia raises an eyebrow. "I’m just trying to give him his memories back. Subaru is okay with my mace. He always is."
“I haven’t heard him say so.” The temperature drops, and Reinhard puts a hand over his Sword’s pommel. "I won't allow it unless he gives his explicit consent."
Subaru blinks. Worst case scenario, he dies and Returns by Death to a moment in which the world makes sense. Best case scenario, he dies and Returns by Death to a moment in which the world makes sense. Subaru shrugs. "Yep, go ahead."
Reinhard's expression falters. "He has a concussion, maybe his judgment isn't the—"
—and Dommy Momilia hits him in the face with the ice mace.
"—Subaru!"
Subaru jolts awake, his chest heavy as if he had run miles. The sound of the ice mace cracking his skull open echoes in his mind like bells in a church. He sits up, still gasping for breath, but rather than Dommy Momilia’s scary expression or might-be-secretly-evil Reinhard’s concerned face, he meets Beako's butterfly eyes with his own. "Bewakow?!"
Beatrice’s looks cut through the fog of his confusion when he takes in her appearance. Long, curly blonde hair, styled in twin drills that spiral down on both sides of her face. A distinctive doll-like dress. Exactly as he remembers her.
Subaru blinks."I'm in… my bed?" His eyes adjust to the soft glow of the sunrise coming from the window as Beatrice stands there, with concern etched across her expression.
"Betty woke her Subaru because he was screa—"
“Is Emilia a Dommy mommy? Do we have a Queen already? Does Reinhard smell like a Witch Cultist? Do you think he is secretly evil?"
“Betty doesn't know what the first thing means,” Beatrice deadpans, lips a thin line, “nor has met the Sword Saint yet, but we don't have a Queen, in fact, that's why Betty's Subaru is helping Emilia win the Royal election.”
It was all a nightmare...
"Sorry I woke you up, Beako," Subaru smiles in relief. Of course it was a dream. Anastasia would never be a communist.
"It’s fine,” Beatrice sighs. “We need to get ready to leave for Priestella anyway, I suppose." Beako rolls out of the bed.
Right, they were supposed to travel today. Seeing that Julius had a younger brother just as annoying as him must have made him have a nightmare. There was no Dommy Momilia, nor a Queen called Capella.
Life is good.
Two days later, when Wilhelm tells Subaru an Archbishop named Capella Lugunica is attacking the city, a heart attack triggers Return By Dead. He should have stayed enough time to find out which Reinhard was secretly evil.