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Barnaby’s unflinching resentment towards anything and everything Christmas never changed. He didn’t like it when they met and Kotetsu made the mistake of trying to get him a Christmas present—at the time they weren’t exactly getting along, so Kotetsu thought that Barnaby hated him rather than the whole holiday season—and he didn’t like it now either. Kotetsu guessed it was just one of those things. Trauma that stuck around and festered until it ultimately just became a splinter embedded into someone’s life. Most everyone had something like that, to some degree. Kotetsu still didn’t like the smell of cigarette smoke ever since the Late and Not Great At All, Actually, Takeshi Kaburagi handed him one when he was just a kid who didn’t know what he was asking for. Anju didn’t know about that back then, or maybe she did when she picked up her baby and smelt the putrid nicotine on his breath. Kotetsu didn’t think about it. The only thing he knew now was that he couldn’t stand the stench. He avoided all the smoke-filled parties and stuck to the balcony when corporate absolutely required his presence.
His avoidance of smoking was probably a lot different than Barnaby’s whole thing, though. Bunny had a pretty damn good reason to not like all this cheerful holiday stuff. Marketing and obnoxious ad campaigns aside, Kotetsu figured it must feel like a kick in the gut to have an entire holiday about family and cheer on the day your parents died. Barnaby never got anybody presents, and he had a pretty lukewarm reaction when he received any. For Kotetsu’s sake he usually managed a smile and no rude comments (even if Kotetsu’s gift-giving ability left a lot to be desired), and that was honestly enough. Kotetsu didn’t expect any gushy stuff from Barnaby, anyway. He wasn’t the type.
Apparently this year was different though. Kotetsu blinked at the gift box on his desk, staring at the foreign object like it was some kind of prank can of nuts that would spring out snakes at him. Honestly, that would be something that happened to him. But when he held it up for closer inspection and then lifted the lid of the box it was a collector’s edition trading card of Mr. Legend. Mint condition too, stuck in a solid looking casing.
Kotetsu didn’t need to see the note on it to know it was from Bunny. Seriously, the guy did too much. If he spent this much on every friend, he’d go broke... if he wasn’t the ultra rich, super popular celebrity son of two dead tycoons. Sometimes Kotetsu forgot about those details, because Bunny was just Bunny to him, not Barnaby fucking Brooks Jr.
“Merry Christmas,” Barnaby passed him by to his desk, acting as casual as ever. Like he didn't just give Kotetsu a two hundred dollar collectible.
His eyes were already honed in on his computer, typing away with his right hand as the left unraveled the black scarf around his neck. His nose was still pink from the biting cold, but he otherwise looked perfectly supermodel-esque as usual. Coiffed blonde hair, designer frames, his expensive leather jacket. Kotetsu nearly dropped that small box when Barnaby’s eyes flicked up to him, a small smile on his face.
“Merry Christmas...?” Kotetsu wasn’t used to this back and forth, because usually there wasn’t one. “Bunny, what’s this about?”
“What, I can’t get you a gift now without being questioned?”
“This thing was two hundred dollars!” Kotetsu fished it out of the box for emphasis.
“We make a hero’s salary.”
Kotetsu really didn’t like how much of a smart ass his partner was, sometimes.
“Well, thanks is what I was going to say. It means a lot to me.” Kotetsu hoped his smile didn't look too dopey, but it probably did. He could never reign in how happy these little gestures made him, especially from someone like Barnaby.
Thankfully, if he looked stupid, Bunny didn’t say anything. Barnaby’s smile was genuine—he had a certain look in his eyes, not sharp but warm. “You’re welcome.”
He turned back to his computer, always back to business. Kotetsu had to finish up some work before their mandatory two-day Christmas break too, but he probably wasn’t going to get any of it done.
Kotetsu pursed his lips. He didn’t actually have anything for Barnaby this year. He didn’t think about it, and besides, Bunny was impossible to shop for anyways. What did you get the guy who literally had everything he could want at his fingertips?
“Are you doing anything over the break?” Kotetsu stepped closer to Barnaby’s desk, craning his head forward to look at the calendar on Barnaby’s screen. Huh. He had that many interviews lined up for February already?
“You know I don’t do anything.” Barnaby didn’t even look up from where he’d been typing.
“Wanna come to my mom’s place, then?”
That made Barnaby stop his typing. He looked at Kotetsu incredulously.
“What?”
“My mom always makes a pretty good Christmas dinner. There’ll be turkey and ham, and probably alcohol since Muramasa will be there. And a bunch of desserts. Kaede’s gotten really good since she started taking a cooking class after school.”
“Isn’t it a bit weird to bring me over for Christmas?”
“Is it?” Kotetsu grinned, “I don’t see the problem with it.”
Barnaby gave him a look, a stern eyebrow and a frown. Perfectly communicating: ‘I see several problems with this.’ Kotetsu didn’t even need Barnaby to say them out loud to know what he was thinking. ‘It’s two days out from Christmas, are you sure that’s okay?’ and ‘Did you think this through?’ and ‘Would your mother want me to come uninvited?’
“Just think about it, okay, Bunny? My mom loves you, Kaede thinks you’re the best thing since sliced bread, and Muramasa even respects you. He doesn’t even respect me!”
Barnaby snorted a laugh. Kotetsu chose to ignore it.
“If you come over, I’ll do all the legwork. I’ll drive us there, I’ll do all the holiday cooking I normally do, I’ll even stop by a coffee shop drive through to get hot chocolate for us. All you’d have to do is show up and look pretty.”
“I’ll think about it.”
“Make a decision by the end of the day and let me know.”
...
Kotetsu would consider having Barnaby in the passenger seat of his SUV something of a Christmas miracle. Technically, a Christmas Eve miracle. Despite his initial protests, the superstar Barnaby Brooks Jr. made time in his busy schedule for Kotetsu’s family Christmas. They were still about thirty minutes out from Oriental Town, the jazz FM radio station filling the silence between them when Kotetsu’s car made a strangled sound somewhere between a mechanical gasp and sputter and an actual, scarily-human-sounding squawk. His car lurched forward. Radio signal cut out, heat cooled, headlights dimmed, and the brakes weren't doing the one job they had to do. It was a blur of road and pine tree as Kotetsu swerved off to the side and ended up in a shallow ditch. In all of Kotetsu’s however-many years of owning this car, it never tried to kill him before.
The old clunker decided to finally slow to a halt a few feet before it could slam into a tree. Out this far from the road, any kind of assistance was going to be hard to get. Kotetsu groaned, belatedly pressing his head into his steering wheel.
“On Christmas Eve.”
He must have done something in a past life that was unforgivable, because he was still receiving the back end of the karma now. This kind of thing wouldn’t happen to anyone else.
“We should get out to inspect the damage.”
In his periphery, Kotetsu could already see his partner unbuckling.
“How do you not have whiplash from that, Bunny...”
Even still, Kotetsu was doing what he was told, pulling the keys out of the ignition and stepping out into the snow.
Nothing looked wrong about the car, but something broke inside of it. Probably a dead battery or engine failure. Or both, the pessimistic part of Kotetsu’s brain supplied. Maybe if it was just a battery problem, he’d be able to flag down someone off the side of the road and get them to jump his car.
Kotetsu scratched his chin. Geez, he really didn’t want to have to wave down strangers on Christmas Eve. “See anything I’m not seeing?”
Barnaby rounded the other side of the car. “It’s probably an internal problem.”
“Great.” Kotetsu grimaced. “Uh, well, I can go try to get some help.”
“From where, exactly?”
“Good Samaritan strangers? Listen, if you’ve got any better ideas, I’d love to hear ‘em.”
Wordlessly, Barnaby brought up his arm and pulled down at his sleeve to reveal the red-lined PDA attached to his wrist.
“Do you even have any signal out here?”
Barnaby pressed the display. “Just enough. I’ll call for roadside assistance.”
Kotetsu nodded, already turning to walk back up to the road. “You do that while I try to get help.”
In Kotetsu’s heart, he believed the world was full of mostly good people. People who would see others in need and step in to help, when they could. Circumstances permitting, of course. And he was really sure someone would help him, if there was another soul on the road now. A single car had passed by right before he’d firmly planted himself off to the side of the road, and it was seemingly the last for a while. Eventually Kotetsu gave up freezing his ass out with his arms waving out for attention to the audience of no one.
Damn.
When he got back to his car, Barnaby had made himself comfortable in the middle row of the SUV, his scarf wrapped around his neck and the bottom-half of his face, and his knees brought up to his chest. If it were any other situation, Kotetsu probably would’ve made some kind of jab about how he looked like a bundle of joy or a ball of fun. But he didn’t really feel up to it.
“So, any word from the outside world?”
“It’ll be another hour before someone can get us in these weather conditions.”
“Jesus.” Kotetsu sighed. “Hey, why are you in the back, anyway?”
“So I can press my knees to my body to conserve heat.” Barnaby rattled that off like it was the most obvious fact in the world. “There’s more space in these seats.”
“Right, yeah.”
It did make sense, though...
“Wha- Hey!” Barnaby indignantly squawked, inching himself back further into the seats against the far door as Kotetsu made his way inside.
“What? I’m just following your advice!” Kotetsu grinned, “You’ve been having it nice up here, sapping up all the leftover warmth in the car while I tried to thumb a ride.”
“And who was so adamant to try that strategy in the first place?”
Kotetsu opted to ignore that last part, closing the door and settling into his corner of the seats. He shuffled his knees close, then rubbed his hands together, breathing into his palms.
Barnaby looked at him, just his furrowed eyebrows and piercing green eyes behind his angular frames visible. Kotetsu didn’t need to see his full face to get the mental image of Bunny’s signature ‘thinking face.’ Like his brain was working overtime to crunch numbers Kotetsu couldn’t even imagine the meaning of. He finally spoke up after a moment.
“You don’t have any blankets in your car?”
“Nope,” Kotetsu frowned, “Mura kept telling me to get one of those and some emergency supplies for the trunk but I just forgot.”
Those green eyes looked away from Kotetsu, in the direction of the windshield, watching the flurry of snowfall drift down onto the world outside of the car. Kotetsu didn’t usually feel guilty for inconveniencing Barnaby—he did that a lot anyway—but this time felt different. There was no smooth jazz to mask the silence in the stagnant, cold air, there was nothing to be said between them, and Kotetsu had this sinking feeling in his gut that he was taking Barnaby away from what he’d usually be doing. What he should be doing. Visiting his parents’ gravesite, leaving a paper-wrapped bundle of pale lilies and white roses where they lay. Instead Bunny was gonna be spending time at Anju’s, with a family he wasn’t even a part of.
Even if the Kaburagi’s Christmas was probably the better option—more enjoyable than mourning, at least—Kotetsu had a feeling his idea of a ‘better option’ and Bunny’s idea of one were rarely the same thing.
God, Bunny really didn’t deserve this on a holiday.
If it were anyone else, like Kaede or Anju, Kotetsu would’ve offered a hug. Not in apology for his car’s malfunction, but just as a comfort. A little ‘hey, I’m here with you and we’ll make it through this together.’ But this was Barnaby, and it felt like the only times they ever hugged were in full-body tech gear.
Kotetsu stretched out his left leg and poked Barnaby’s right boot with his foot.
“Hm?”
“I was thinking,” Kotetsu shot Bunny a lopsided smile, “don’t people in these kinds of situations usually huddle for warmth?”
Barnaby looked at him for a long moment. “Yes, they do. You’re not suggesting we cuddle to prevent hypothermia, are you?”
“If it was between hugging you or dying, I’d wanna hug you.”
“How sentimental.” Barnaby curled himself further into his jacket. Ouch.
“Come on, Bunny. Don’t make me beg for a hug from you. You’re a lot warmer than I am over here.” Kotetsu vaguely gestured to himself, in his usual attire. It had been easier to slap on the same old shirt and slacks with a long overcoat that was more for style than warmth. It was a gift from Anju about three winter’s ago, intended to be worn at all those PR events that Kotetsu did everything to avoid in the first place.
“I’m comfortable here.”
“Well then I’ll just have to come to you.”
Kotetsu managed to practically crawl his way over to Barnaby’s half of the seat, though when Barnaby shifted his position to adjust for him, Kotetsu ended up on his hands and knees more or less over Barnaby than he’d expected. His breath caught in his throat.
Kotetsu had his pride, but even he could admit when something was a bad idea.
He was going to peel away, back to his own lonely corner, but Barnaby reached for him instead, wrapping his arms around Kotetsu’s midsection.
Kotetsu laughed into Barnaby’s shoulder. “So, hugging’s better than hypothermia?”
“I’m not going to say no to more heat.”
“Uh huh.”
They stayed like that, clutching onto each other in a tight hug for warmth until Bunny squirmed underneath Kotetsu.
“Bunny?” Kotetsu looked up at him, pulling back a bit so his face wasn’t literally centimeters away from his partner’s. “Something up?”
“This is getting uncomfortable.” He grumbled, and Kotetsu felt the vibration of it in his own chest. “We should move onto our sides.”
“Pfft.” Kotetsu couldn’t help the sound he made, somewhere between a laugh and a snort.
Barnaby frowned at him, one of those wordless kinds.
“Well, it’s just-” How did he explain that being sideways somehow felt more intimate than this? “Wouldn’t that be like, canoodling?”
“Canoodling.”
With nowhere to hide his face except in Barnaby’s shoulder, Kotetsu just looked downwards. Maybe he was the problem, making this more embarrassing than it needed to be.
“Ugh, just forget I said anything. Come on, let’s do this.”
It was an awkward shuffle in the backseat until they maneuvered exactly like Bunny wanted—his back to the seats, and Kotetsu pressed up against him, his arms wrapped around Barnaby and his head in his shoulder again. They were so close, he could hear every breath Bunny took, and all those little discontented sighs.
Admittedly though, this was nicer. Kotetsu’s back didn’t hurt so bad from this angle, and even if he wasn’t super grateful now, he’d probably be later.
They were quiet again, but Kotetsu couldn’t stand the feeling in the air.
“I’m sorry about all this.” Kotetsu squeezed Barnaby’s midsection tighter for a moment.
“It’s not your fault the car died.”
“Not just that. This whole... thing.”
It felt like when the words were important to say, Kotetsu just couldn’t say them. Articulating all this was hard. How did he tell Bunny, ‘Sorry, I thought you’d rather spend time with your dead parents than this’ without sounding stupid?
Kotetsu’s mouth moved before his brain could pump the brakes, and he pulled back from Barnaby, just enough so he could look at him.
“I know you said you didn’t have plans, but you were probably going to go visit your parents, right? And then I suggested this trip to my family’s Christmas, and then my car died, and now we're stuck hugging for warmth on the side of the road.” Kotetsu huffed a laugh, somewhere between feeling pitiful and just plain pathetic, “All because I wanted to spend Christmas with you, Bunny. I thought this might be better than staying cooped up in your fancy apartment the whole holiday.”
Barnaby didn’t say anything at first, but his heart hammered against his chest, pressed close to Kotetsu. Every beat felt like a drum in Kotetsu’s ears. Even though he’d known Bunny for this long and the guy didn’t leave, even through all the shit they’d gone through together, part of Kotetsu wondered if fucking up plans on the day before the Brooks’ death anniversary would be the last straw.
Kotetsu didn’t really wait for a response, even when it looked like Barnaby was about to start talking.
“Hell, I didn’t even get you a present yet. I just didn’t really think about it, since we don’t usually get each other stuff for Christmas. ...I guess I was kind of hoping that I could swing my original gift idea to you, back when we first met and all the other heroes pitched in to throw you a birthday party.”
Barnaby raised a skeptical, perfectly-manicured eyebrow up. “That pink bunny thing wasn’t your idea?”
“I mean, I picked it out, but Nathan was the one who charged it to their card. Karina said I should’ve gone out and bought you something, but by that point it was a bit too late for that.”
“So what was your gift idea, then?”
“Hanging out with me?” Kotetsu snorted. “I mean, I didn’t say it was a good present.”
“Well, you’ve certainly delivered.”
Jackass, Kotetsu could practically see the cocky smile on his lips underneath the scarf. All the semi-mean thoughts Kotetsu had towards Barnaby melted away when his partner shifted his grip on him, just to hold him closer.
“Honestly,” Bunny spoke up, “Despite the set-backs, this has been nice.”
“Wh- how?”
“I enjoy watching you squirm.”
“Don’t you get enough of your fill when we do photo shoots together? I hate those damn things. Can’t stand still during ‘em.”
“And I like holding you like this.” Bunny emphasized his point by nudging Kotetsu’s foot with his own. “It’s been a while since you’ve been in my arms.”
“I try not to make it a habit, but you seem to like carrying me.”
“It’s an easy way to save you.”
“I can think of at least five more ways that don’t involve picking me up like I’m a bride. Anyway- I was trying to say something serious and sentimental!” Bunny laughed, and Kotetsu felt like the space between them was too warm now, “What I’m getting at is that- I’m sorry for all this. I like you a lot, and I wouldn’t have invited you over if I didn’t. I don’t even invite Antonio to my family stuff.”
“Oh, wow.”
There it was again, that fast hammering thump of Barnaby’s heart, squeezing and beating fast. Though the way Kotetsu felt it in his own ears, his own heart was racing. Racing over what? It was just Bunny. Laughing at him, hugging him, and- looking at Kotetsu, the black of his eyes practically swallowing up that forest green he knew all too well. Fuck. He shouldn’t have done this at all. He was in too deep.
Kotetsu knew he liked Bunny more than just this, he’d known for a while, but he didn’t usually have to face that head on, so he just didn’t think about it. Unless he was nursing a bottle or two or eight on his couch at night, wallowing in the waves of self-pity, he didn’t like to linger on the thought that he fell for his partner. Workplace relationships were bad. This was bad. Bunny was out of his league like crazy, Kotetsu was too old to date like some kind of love-struck teenager, he didn’t need a ‘boyfriend,’ and Barnaby didn’t need to deal with Kotetsu’s issues on top of his own. Really, when everything stacked up like that, Kotetsu didn’t think he’d ever end up here. Cuddling with Bunny in the backseat of his car, faces inches apart.
Barnaby took his hand away from Kotetsu’s side—fuck, could he read him that well? He had to know. With his now-free hand, Barnaby pulled his scarf down his neck, away from his face.
Kotetsu tried to reel in every thought that came to his mind. Bunny’s lips looked warm and inviting, and Kotetsu was so close he felt the warmth radiating off of his face.
Barnaby’s free hand came up to cup Kotetsu’s cheek and he was done for. Kotetsu couldn’t help it. Despite the cold around them, Bunny found a way to make Kotetsu feel warm and fuzzy.
“I love you-”
“I love you.”
Hah?
Kotetsu laughed, “Way to steal my spotlight, Bunny. As usual.”
“Stop making lame comments, old man.”
Kotetsu didn’t have time to retort or apologize (he hadn’t decided which would come out of his mouth) when Barnaby closed the distance between them, his soft lips all over Kotetsu’s. Electric. It was like straight fireworks in his veins, and Kotetsu melted into Barnaby’s touch. Savored it, and then really savored it, swinging his leg over Barnaby’s to bring them closer, letting himself get lost in everything that was Bunny. Barnaby wasn’t good at kissing, it was so sloppy and mouthy, but Kotetsu couldn’t find it in himself to care. So what if it wasn’t good, by normal standards. That just made it better. Barnaby fucking Brooks Jr couldn’t be the master of everything. Realizing that just made Kotetsu even more excited to show Bunny just how good of a lover he could be.
When Bunny finally let Kotetsu breathe again, he couldn’t help his goofy smile.
Bunny made a face. “What?”
“This is canoodling, now. By definition, I think.”
“Do you ever shut up?”
At the sound of a heavy fist banging against the car door, Kotetsu floundered untangling himself off of Bunny, flailing and then hitting the floor of the car with a thud.
“Fuck.” Kotetsu groaned, hand immediately flying to the part of his back that bore the brunt of the fall. His entire spine felt the impact, waves of pain radiating out from it.
Barnaby sighed. “I’ll talk to the handymen.”
“...Please.”