Chapter Text
Wednesday.
iMessage
jimbob
Today 19:48
Hey Sirius
OI
OI
OI
OI
OI
OI
OI
OI
fucking hell
WHAT
you woke me up you prick
Late night????
I told you!!!!
Stop staying up till the witching hour to finish editing ur vids!!!!!!
They'll still be there in the morning!!!!!!
yes i was totally editing a video i have recorded for my youtube channel all night
i was definitely not sleeping for 12 hours straight.
?!?!?!?!
How is tht even possible
if i tell u then ur gonna laugh at me :(
I literally won't!!!!!
When was the last time I laughed at you
when i kept dying on that one part in tomb raider.
That was AGES AGO!!
MORE LIKE THREE DAYS AGO.
cunt
I pinky promise I won't laugh or judge or lecture you or whatever
If I do then u can have the rest of my toblerone
omg
okay. i was watching asmr
my dirty secret is out now. I'M AN ASMR WATCHER.
That's not embarrassing
I mean I don't rlly like it cuz it rlly annoys me personally
Like y r u going so slow PICK UP THE PACE!!!!!!
But whatever tickles your pickle my dear sirius
idk why i was weirdly shameful about this
anyway
i found a new asmrtist to watch
was out like a light after one 45 min vid
slept like a log the whole night til u spammed my phone like a loony
Woaw
R they that good??
YES.
he's also fit as fuck
i kinda felt self conscious watching him like what if he can see me thru the screen and i look like a greasy loser :((
Omg no ur actually gorg
If he saw u thru ur camera he'd have fallen in love w u instantly and would have appeared outside ur window throwing pebbles at it w a stereo on his shoulder playing a love song
thanks james
u always know the right thing to say <3
ANYWAY BEFORE YOU RUDELY DIVERTED MY ATTENTION!!!
The landlord is upping the rent a bit
Like the fucking loser he is.
how much more money does he want
it's literally not even worth it anymore
our lease isn't up till may tho it's litchrally september
IK!!!!!
We just have to wait it out
Time will fly by
I think we should save some extra money so we can afford a nicer flat
don't talk to me about savings and rent this early in the morning
It's literally not early
You're just a lazy git
okay mr. i-jog-daily-at-6am
that took me too long to type out
Jogging is good for you
if it's so good for me then why does it make me suicidal every time you make me do it
the nhs therapy waiting list is too long for me to be jeopardising my mental health, james.
Ur such a drama queen!!!!!
i'm not i'm just reasonable unlike you
the cycling machine is my fave bc i can watch my phone at the same time
Ok but fr can u get up so we can go shopping cuz we literally have no food in the freezer and we can't keep eating takeaways if we're gonna be saving money now
ughhhhhhhhhh
fine
:DDd
Instagram DMs
Mary
marymacasmr
14:01
Heeyyyyyyyy
omg long time no speak
i miss you we need to hang out soon
YES
We can go to the new aquarium or something!
omg yes please that would be so nice
OKAY that’s not acc why I decided to message u!!!
oh??
I was just wondering if you’d like to collab or smth!!!
I was thinking of doing a new series on my channel where I get non-asmr YouTubers to try it out and maybe do some sort of q&a
I LITERALLY GASPED
i would fucking love that
you know i love asmr
:P
U would be the first of many (fingers crossed)
i am so down for it
Do you want to film something for ur channel as well??
So then it's even ofc
hmmm
nah
it's fine
maybe in the future we can play a game for my gaming channel but c:
i'm happy just doing a vid for ur channel
GREAT!!!!!!!!!
when r u free??
i can do tomorrow, friday or sunday any time
Friday evening??????
Then maybe we can get drunk afterwards and it be socially acceptable than if it was a Thursday morning
i love the way u think
:D
Okay I'll put a q&a post or smth on Twitter or whatever
You should do the same so we can both have questions to answer
smart
Anyway
HOW R U
hahahaha i'm very good
i was actually watching asmr last night
Better have been watching one of my vids
So then I get adsense
ummmmmm.........
WOW.
How DARE you cheat on me!!!!!
We're over
I'M SORRY!!!!
i wasn't thinking.....
please take me back
If you tell me who u were watching then I might
this guy called MoonyASMR
i can't lie to you i fell asleep after ONE video
like i can't believe he was that good
i've never heard of him before but he has like 200k subs so idk how
Ohhhh Remus
that's his name????
Time to do some stalking
HAHAHAHA
I'd give u his personal @ but like u guys dunno each other
unfortunately
are u two friends??
Yessss
I acc love him
(Platonically)
oh thank god
he's so fit i would have cried if you were in love with him
i would have had to steal him from under ur nose
No need
He's single but not really mingling with anyone rn
He's as free as a bird
that is WONDERFUL news.
i've never met him obvs but i'm guessing he's at least decent if you're friends with him
and queer
IT'S NOT MY FAULT I ATTRACT QUEER PEOPLE
Also Remus is great I think u two would balance each other out
omg r u shipping us
Totes
I think you'd be cute together tbh
mary he's so fit
i'm gonna binge watch all his vids tonight
maybe dm him or smth
You go girl
I wish you all the luck in the world
thank you mary <33
love you
Love you too <3
I'll let you know when I'm free so we can go on our aquarium date
perf x
iMessage
lillian
Today 17:02
Hiya I'm grabbing supper from the chippy, what do u want?
if you weren't with james and i were into women then i think i'd fall in love with you
can I get a burger with no tomatoes pleaase
🫡
Finally got our food
I'll be like 10 mins
I'm driving instead of taking the bus
does that mean you can be my personal chauffeur??????
Oh hardy harr
I can't believe you never get fish from THE FISH AND CHIP SHOP!
i can't help it if i'm so original and go against the grain
i'm an independent thinker
Where was your independent thinking when you copied my maths homework in year 11
UM LOW BLOW!
that was like 7 years ago how do u even remember that
anyway
HURRY UP I'M STARVING.
Stop texting me then
YOU'RE the one replying
pretty please can you stop at the off licence and get some booze
Way ahead of you
Open the door please
Thursday.
jimbob
Today 1:23
i am so drunk
honestly why did you let me take that many shots of tequila
I dunno to b honesy
I regret it because I had to literally drag you to your bed
I'm not exactly sober!!!!!!!
I could have fallen and broken both our necks
thankssssss
james ur such a good ffiend
autocorrect is saving my arse
I was wondering how hour spelling as so good
i'm just so talented
i love being a youtuber because that means i can get shitfaced whenever i want
Still wondering WHY you wanted to get shitfaced on a Wednesday night
courage
???
i wana message hot asmr giy
moony asme
Omg???!!!!!!!!!
Does he have an insta
yessss
i followed him earlier
and he followed me back!!!!!
thst LITERALLY MENAS THAR WE R MESNT TO BE TOGETEHR
Of course
YOH should dm him NOW SO THEN TOU DONT Accidentally PASS OUT!!!!
Also because I'm TIRED and Lily is making me turn my phone off now
okay loooserrrttt
have fun being boring
i'm goinf to medsahhe moonyasmr noe
Instagram DMs
Remus
moony_asmr
1:32
heyy
i jusr realised um ur probfs asleep but
i wanted to tell you that I lovr your asmr videos evrn thoigh i onlt found our abour you yesyterday
or actually 2 days sgo noe since itd tue bext day now
excuse my word vom
Oh shit
Hello
Thank you for watching my videos, I'm really happy that you like them
omf moony they r a belssinf
i fell aslerp the first time fi watched you after one cideo
Haha
That's a massive compliment, thank you
This is so weird because I've been subscribed to you for at least 4 years now
I can't believe you watch my videos
OFC!!!
i lpve amr
ASMT
ASMR
i'm goid friends with matu
mary
Ohhh Mary??
I'm friends with her too
She's really great.
heyt i'm realy glaf she's not in lpve with you
Oh um
I didn't think she was?
Goodnight Sirius