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Once upon a time, There was a girl in her tower attic room. She had always waited for the day that she could be free and safe to be herself. She thought that day was when she came to London and joined Lockwood & Co. But she was wrong, because that too hadn’t left her feeling free and safe.
As long as Lucy Carlyle stayed at Portland Row with that little self-run Agency, she would never be safe. Because they would never be safe. It was more important to her for them to be safe.
She zipped up her duffle bag. One last look around her attic room to see if there was anything she hadn’t packed yet. Apart from the ghost-jar that she intended to pack last.
She walked over to her mirror. She straightened out her clothes. She slipped her coat on. Not yet zipping it up.
“I’m doing this for them. To keep them alive.” She whispered to her reflection. She wiped the tears from her eyes before they could stain her face.
She went to wrap her scarf around her neck when she noticed a familiar glint of something shiny around her neck. That little diamond pendant necklace Lockwood had gifted her a few years before. The one she rarely ever took off because it reminded her of the important things in life. Home, safety and people who care about her. People she cares about too.
It reminded her of him. Oh, how she doesn’t want to leave him. But she had to.
Maybe she should leave the necklace behind.
Cut off all ties to the life she once lived here.
Maybe?
She could put on her scarf later before she sets foot out the front door into the cold air and quiet early morning of today. Christmas Day. She hadn’t originally planned on leaving the actual house until after the new year. But with everyone treading so carefully around her with their politeness. She didn’t know if she could last another week living like that in this house.
She grabbed the ghost jar from its usual place and took it over to her bed where her bags lay. She dropped her scarf on her top of her duffle bag.
“It’s just you and me now, Skull.” She said to Skull.
The Skull in the jar just glowed faintly in lieu of saying anything.
She put the ghost-jar in the backpack. She picked up her duffle bag and scarf in her left hand and the backpack containing the ghost-jar slung on her right shoulder
She walked toward the stairs out of the room. One final look back before she flicked the light switch off. A goodbye for-evermore, she thought for a moment.
She walked down the stairs as softly and quietly as she could. She didn’t want to wake anyone up. She figured it was better this way. To just leave in the dead of the morning. Nothing to show or say that she had lived here. (Apart from the little Christmas presents in the living room under the tree that she had placed there before she had even decided to leave in the first place. She couldn’t exactly take them back now. Could she.)
She stopped outside Lockwood’s door for just a moment. A part of her wanting to say something to him before she left. But she shouldn’t. Right?
Her right hand went to fidgeting with her necklace.
Out of habit. Out of comfort.
She dropped her hand and shook her head lightly. She was leaving. There was no going back on that.
She took off the necklace and hung it on Lockwood’s door handle.
Cut off all ties.
Let her Christmas gifts be her goodbye to them and Portland Row.
She turned away from door and continued her walk down.
There was a creak.
She froze, she was almost half way down the stairs to the ground floor. She hoped it wasn’t her on the steps. She hoped it wasn’t a door. Please just let it be the wind. Please don’t let be one of the boys waking up.
Please don’t be Lockwood.
Another creak, this one slightly longer. Followed by the sound of something dropping to floor. (She knew exactly what it was. The necklace. So, she knew exactly who it was too.)
“You were just going to leave without saying a word.” The voice spoke from behind her. Hints of pain and anger evident in his voice.
“How else was I meant to leave, Lockwood?” She said. Not yet turning around to face him. She wouldn’t do that. To turn around would be accepting the lure and letting the pattern repeat. She can’t let the pattern repeat, she can’t lose anyone else to death or something worse.
“Not like this. Not saying anything and just leaving behind…” His words trailed off as he picked up the object off the floor and realised what it was. “A proper goodbye, Lucy. Don’t we deserve that to say the least. Don’t I?” His voice thick with sadness. The necklace held carefully and securely in his hand. He might lose her but he wouldn’t lose the necklace which held memories of her and more than her.
“A proper goodbye?” She repeated. She tried to keep her emotions under control. “Don’t you think that would hurt me? As much as it would hurt you. Or George or Holly.”
He didn’t say a word. What does he say when you know she’s hurting as much as he’s hurting?
“Me leaving, it’s to keep you and the other safe from my growing Talent. There is no figuring this out, Lockwood.” She said as she (without thinking) turned to face him. Her pain clear in her voice and her words angry.
“How do you know that if we don’t try? Don’t you understand that we care about you here.” He replied. “That I care about you.” He added softly. Tears falling from his eyes.
She wanted to go up to him, wipe those tears and give him a hug. Of course, she understands that they all care about her. She cares about them too.
Instead, she doesn’t say a word.
She just doesn’t say a word.
Not a single word.
Neither does he.
Not a word was spoken by her or him.
But actions? Now that’s a different thing.
Before she even realised it, she running up the stairs to Lockwood. Her duffle bag fallen from her hand and rolled somewhere behind her. She wiped his tears and gently cupped his face.
They just looked into each other’s eyes. No words, just actions. Physical emotional actions speak so much louder than verbal thoughts.
A kiss. Simple and sweet. Honest and true.
“Maybe I could stay. Maybe try again. Maybe we can figure this out. Maybe we…” She started. Her words trailed off when he took her hand.
“Maybe we.” He repeated. “Maybe we what, Luce?”
“Maybe we should talk about this.” She answered softly.
And they did.
Eventually. (After they stopped kissing for a while.)
The girl stayed. A necklace back in its rightful place on her neck. The boy beside her holding her hand and her heart. As she held his too.
Promises kept, they’ll figure out.
Of course, they will.
Christmas went well for the little Agency of four people. Smiles and joy all around.
They might still have their issues but they can figure it out. They’re stronger together than they are apart.
It’ll be fine. Of course, it will. This little fracture will heal one day.