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It's over. It’s over. It's over. It's over. It's over
was all that was speeding through Krupp's head.
The loud bangs shooting through him each time they went off, the laughing faded into the distance, even in a room with at least one hundred people he felt alone.
Alone with his thoughts, his memories, his pain.
The blasts weren’t real, not this time. Krupp knew that, but it didn't stop the memories flashing through his mind.
They came from Joule, who was showing off again, sparks cascading from her body, sending blasts of light around the large room, each one filling the room with applause, laughter and cheers from Electra's many party guests.
What should have been a night of celebrations blurred into sensations that dragged him back.
Back to places he didn’t want to remember.
He was meant to be walking around, following Electra around making sure no one tried to hurt him, or get too close, but here he was, flat against the wall, eyes shut, waiting for it to end.
What sort of Security guard was he if he couldn't even protect his boss in his own home?
"Krupp!" a voice called out, "Krupp!"
His eyes didn't open until a soft gentle hand grasped his shoulder, "Are you alright?"
Wrench asked, eyebrows knitted together with worry.
Krupp nodded but they both knew he was lying, "It's just loud that's all."
"I can take over if you want to go upstairs." The Repair truck suggested.
"I’m fine!” Krupp snapped, drawing a few curious glances from nearby engines. which he immediately regretted, hunching his shoulders and avoiding their stares.
Wrench didn’t back down, she had delt with him during these moments before. “You’re not. And that’s okay. Come on, just for a bit. Fresh air might help.”
Another bang made him jump, his right hand instinctively reaching for his closest weapon which just happened to be the most obvious. The gun in its holster at his side, but his hand was quickly knocked away by Wrench who had luckily seen what he was about to do.
"You're safe…come outside with me for a moment. It'll just keep getting worse the longer you're in here."
Krupp stared at her, his breath coming out in shallow gasps, the weight of the gun's presence against his side both grounding and terrifying. He wanted to argue, to bark out that he didn’t need to be coddled, but the tension in Wrench’s gaze stopped him.
She wasn’t judging him. She wasn’t pitying him. She was… worried.
"I'm pretty sure Purse is outside, do you want me to find him?" A second voice spoke on the other side of him, turning his head to see Volta, a similarly worried look on her face.
Stop being weak, his mind screamed.
"I'm going outside" he whimpered, he needed to get out of here before he ended up hurting someone.
He'd done it before, not to a party full of people but it destroyed him just the same.
Only a few months after him and Purse had officially started dating, he had a flashback during the night, and he wasn't sure what triggered it.
But what he was sure about was that when he came to, Purse's bedroom was trashed, furniture knocked over, picture frames smashed, and worst of all, he was kneeling on the bed, his knees on either side of Purse's legs and his hands around the Money truck's throat.
Krupp had been beside himself, telling Purse to leave and never see him again, but Purse refused, saying he loved him and no matter what they would always take care of each other, through thick and thin.
And that certainly hadn't been the last time he had a violent episode, although most of them involved him being violent against himself.
The three moved through the swarms of guests, Krupp's hands coming up to cover his ears, each step felt like torture, pushing him further and further into his memories.
"I'm here….You're safe." Purse's voice reached his ears, Krupp expected himself to still be stood in the hallway, but he wasn't.
He was sat, side by side with Purse on one of the many garden benches Electra had put in just for looks, Purse's hands cradling his larger ones, the girls were stood nearby, close enough to keep their eye on the two but far enough away to not hear them.
"Are you coming back to me?" Purse asked, his thumb brushing against the others knuckles.
'I think so.." Krupp whispered, "Can we go to bed?"
Purse sat up straighter, shocked that Krupp was giving in to his body rather than breaking himself trying to do his job.
The money truck stood, gently pulling Krupp to his feet, keeping a firm but comforting grip on his partner’s hand. They would have to go through one of the secure entrances to make sure no one saw them, luckily Krupp had shown Purse exactly where those were not too long ago.
Slipping through the hallways towards the closest elevator, Purse was glad they wouldn't be able to hear any of the noise from upstairs, and that no one without permission had access to this part of the mansion, The noise was completely gone once the elevator reopened, leaving only the sound of their wheels, the quiet hum of the mansion's electrical systems, and Krupp's whimpers.
They soon entered their shared bedroom, the space was dim, bathed in the soft glow of a bedside lamp. Krupp’s shoulders dropped as he entered, Purse guided him to sit on the edge of the bed and knelt before him, his hands still cradling Krupp’s.
“I’m proud of you, you know,” Purse spoke, his gaze soft. “You didn’t have to push through that, but you did anyway.”
Krupp looked away, guilt flickering across his face. “I shouldn’t be here in the first place. I’m a liability. What kind of security guard gets spooked by a light show?”
Purse cupped his cheek, gently tilting his face back toward him. “The kind who’s been through hell and still keeps showing up for the people he loves. Don’t sell yourself short, Krupp.”
The armaments truck exhaled shakily, leaning into Purse’s touch. It was moments like this, when his defences were down and his partner's unwavering support was front and centre, that he felt both unworthy and overwhelmingly grateful.
“I’m scared, Purse,” Krupp admitted in a broken whisper. “One day, I might not snap out of it in time. What if… what if it’s you again?”
Purse didn’t flinch. He simply moved to sit beside him, wrapping an arm around Krupp’s shoulders and pulling him close. “You won't. I know you won't."
It might not have been the best thing to say but Purse couldn't help it slip out.
For a while, they sat in silence, Krupp’s breaths evened out, his head resting against Purse’s.
“Lie down,” Purse easing him back onto the bed. Krupp didn’t protest, letting his partner guide him under the covers, neither caring about the fact they were still fully clothed, just needing to be close to each other for as long as it took for Krupp to feel better.
Purse climbed in beside him, “I’m here. Just rest,” he said, his voice a low murmur.
Krupp’s eyes fluttered shut, the steady rhythm of Purse’s breathing pulling him toward sleep. For the first time in hours, his thoughts began to quiet.
But that didn't last long.
The dream began like all the others, bright flashes, deafening explosions, screams tearing through the air. Krupp’s mind plunged him back into the chaos, his hands were caked in blood, he could feel it running down the side of his face, his fallen friends lay around him, their eyes staring into his own.
There was no way he could get out of this alive, but he had.
But it didn't mean he wouldn't wake up every morning trembling at the thought of what his death should have been like, after all he should have died that day.
“Krupp!” a voice cut through the haze.
That didn't sound like his Commander but there was something so…familiar about that voice.
"Krupp!" The voice repeated.
His eyes snapped open, but the nightmare still clung to him, overlapping with reality. The faint glow of the lamp cast flickering shadows, he was going to get attacked, he was going to be killed.
He was ready, gripping his gun, the cold metal pressing into his palm, finger on the trigger.
“Drop it,” the voice commanded—steady, calm, familiar.
That was when the light moved, the warzone changing, no longer was he stood in the middle of death looking his attacker in the eyes…he was in a familiar bedroom.
His vision focused. Electra stood at the edge of the bed, his hands raised in a gesture of surrender. The Electric Engine’s usual smug confidence was gone, replaced with a careful, measured tone.
Although he didn't seemed scared like one normally would after waking up with a gun pointed at their face.
“Electra…” Krupp whispered, tears streaming down his face. His hands shook violently as he lowered the weapon, his breath coming in shallow gasps.
Purse was beside him in an instant, gently but firmly taking the gun from his grasp. “You’re safe, love. You’re here, with me.”
The others were there too, they must have been there the whole time, how long had he even been in Electra's room?
Krupp stared at his empty hands, the weight of what had just happened crashing over him. “I… I could have…”
“You didn’t,” Electra interrupted, his voice softer now. “But we need to talk about this. Not right now, but soon.”
Krupp nodded weakly, his gaze falling to the floor. He felt Purse’s arms wrap around him again, grounding him in the moment.
“I can't do this…I can't work for you anymore."
"It was one small accident-" Electra started but he was cut off by the crying truck.
"None of you are safe with me here, you need to find a better security truck. One who won't try to kill you."
Wrench went to object but was stopped.
"You've all tried to help but I'm not getting any better, I need to go."
Purse stared at Electra for a moment.
"If he goes, I go." Sucking in a deep breath, rubbing Krupp's back, "I'll help you find our replacements."
Electra nodded with a frown, if that was what they thought was best for Krupp then he would allow it, they weren't just his minders…they were his friends…his family.