Work Text:
The text message arrives on a Wednesday morning.
Hi bro. Heard you’re back in town, wanna hang out? Haven’t seen you in months.
News travels fast. And Rich reaching out like is this…suspicious. Eli sighs and texts back. I am, I guess. And we can hang out, sure. How did you even hear?
As expected, the answer is Never underestimate the power of our sisters in passing gossip, and uncle Randall is even worse. My place, tonight? There might be snacks.
Eli likes snacks. He feels a little bad leaving Becky alone, but she’s already pointed out that he tends to hover and she needs space, and leaving the house is actually a good idea because the stress of - of literally everything right now is getting to him, so…
Yeah ok.
They set a time. Eli volunteers to bring pizza. He runs late, of course, because he takes the subway and there are delays, per usual, and the pizza place is busy and he’s already feeling harassed by the time he gets to Richard’s place. It’s a tiny little apartment in Brooklyn, but Rich worked hard on making it neat and fashionable and used the space well. Eli likes it, had crashed on Rich’s sofa a few times when their dad had been at his worst, after they all got back. After mom died, Eli forces himself to think.
“Hey, kid. Come on in.” Rich slings a one-armed hug around him when he comes in, and takes the pizza with his other hand. “Drink?”
“Uh. Sure?” There are beers on the table, and Eli knows that Rich knows how old he is, but if they’re on offer, he won’t refuse. “Dad’ll be pissed if he finds out though.”
“I won’t tell him if you won’t. Besides, you’ve been to college and also lived in Italy so I’ll assume this won’t be the first drop of alcohol to pass your lips.” Rich sits down on his half-sized sofa and motions for Eli to join him, popping the caps of both bottles while Eli settles down.
“Well, no.” Eli agrees, only half reluctant. Even in Europe he hadn’t been old enough to drink legally when they’d left, but he’d snuck a few sips of wine from his parents and the occasional illicit beer shared with friends after school. And there was beer at college parties, sometimes. He’s avoided the harder stuff, after his experience with pills. He’s still not sure he’s a fan of beer anyway, but takes a sip after knocking his bottle against Rich’s lightly.
Rich, with the excellent timing reserved for older brothers everywhere, waits until Eli has a mouth full of beer before continuing. “I hear you’re engaging in the old family tradition, knocking a girl up without even trying for it.”
Eli, obviously, chokes on his beer rather spectacularly. “Christ.” He splutters inelegantly, barely avoiding spitting beer all over the sofa. “Timing, Rich.”
“Yes, thank you. I’m a master.” Rich makes a show of buffing his nails on his shirt, and Eli socks him in the arm, still coughing. “Am I wrong?”
Eli is quiet for a while, getting his breath back. “I mean. Becky’s pregnant, so…maybe? I don’t know about a tradition. Gonna guess Randall told you?”
“Got it in one. Said you might want a spot of brotherly advice and that dad doesn’t know yet.”
“He figured it out this morning, actually.” Eli still feels bad about it. “I made ginger tea.”
“He made a ton of it for mom, when you were on the way.” Rich nods. “Apparently she swore by it. With us as well.” He gives Eli a searching look. “You don’t look shattered and your hair’s all still there, so I guess he took it reasonably well?”
The truth is, Eli still has no idea. He shrugs. “He didn’t seem angry. Hurt, that I told uncle Randall first. I didn’t, though - Grandma B looked at Becky and figured it out the moment we walked in, and he was home. She’s not even showing yet…”
“Yeah, but grandma’s grandma, she figures things out.” Rich shrugs as well. “So you’re not going back to college?”
“I signed up for the Police Academy.” Eli says, by way of answer, and Rich winces.
“Bet that went over like a ton of bricks with dad.”
“Oh yeah. He hates the idea. Grandma loved it though.”
“Yeah…the old man takes some getting used to us making what he sees as the mistakes he made.” Rich raises his hands in a ‘what can you do’ gesture. “You were just a baby, when I got it into my head that I’d drop everything and enlist, after - some bad shit went down, dad’s job had to get involved and that’s never a good thing. I needed parental approval because I was still a minor, and dad wouldn’t give it, of course. We fought, and later, after we both cooled down, he said if I still wanted to join up after I graduated high school, he’d support it, even though he didn’t like the idea.”
Eli frowns. “And did you?” He’d been a kid and in another country by that time, and not entirely up to speed on what his siblings were doing.
“Yeah, for a couple of years stateside, after college. Mostly to show dad that I could. Made me stick out the whole stint too, even though I hated it most of the time. He was too far away to be smug about that, which I appreciated. But back to you, baby bro. How far along is Becky?”
“About ten weeks? Could be off by a few days.” Eli feels awkward saying it. Pregnancy is a whole new language he’s still learning, and it all feels big and overwhelming and terrifying. Rich gives him a mostly sympathetic look.
“I’m sure dad gave you the extra warning, when he gave you the talk about sex, that Stablers should be extra careful what they do with their dicks.”
“Uh. No?”
Rich’s eyebrows shoot up. “Seriously? I got that warning and also a surprise baby brother when I was 14 and my parents were technically already divorced, plus the knowledge that mom graduated highschool pregnant and married, as an extra practical demonstration of the risks involved. Extra powerful sperm, or something. That dad didn’t warn you to be more careful is totally on him.”
“Uh. I guess he wasn’t really…you know. He was working a lot, and after mom, and - I got the basic talk when I was like twelve, you know?” And a mortifying experience that had been, too. “Guess I never got the advanced version. Becky and I - we thought we were being careful. Just not enough, clearly.” He ends, kind of sour, knowing he was flushed bright red just from discussing it. It’s not exactly that he’s unhappy about the whole thing - in fact, occasionally he lets himself be thrilled and elated about it - but it’s a stick in both their wheels.
“And you’re definitely up for both of you quitting school, moving back here, and keeping it?” Rich asks, brutally direct. It’s more than anybody else in the family’s asked so far, and Eli looks away.
“I mean - yeah. Becky wants to keep it, she can go back to school here in the city, later. And - I love her. I want to support her and stay with her, and it’s my kid, you know? I’m not going to ditch them for a college degree I wasn’t that into in the first place.” Is he unprepared? Wildly. But it’s the right thing to do.
“Okay.” Rich nods, his face more serious now. “I hope you know the whole family’s going to support you on that. Potentially, more closely than you both will enjoy, at some point.”
“Becky survived that awful dinner and didn’t dump me on the spot.” Eli offers a weak grin, “She’ll be okay. And I - well, I survived Maureen in the first year after mom -” he stalls and forces it out, “died. I can handle the family.” He knows it might be hard, but he doesn’t know much about babies, except that people say they take a village to raise, and he has a pretty good village on hand.
“Fair.” Rich nods again. “You sure about the police academy? Joining the force will be easier with a college degree, if you’re sure about it. Dad was always hung up about how he had to do night classes for college. It’s why he was so insistent on all of us going.”
Eli nods in turn. He knows, had it drummed into him from childhood, that education was important, that both their parents had gone to college despite working and raising kids, and it was a privilege for him to be able to do it without those two things in the background. “I’m sure. I need to be able to - to support a family. Being a cop gets us all insurance and benefits and it’s not boring. Plus, there’s a family legacy.”
“Eli.” Rich almost never uses their names, so Eli knows this is serious, “It’s a shitty family legacy. Grandpa was an abusive asshole and an alcoholic, dad was never there and always angry or overprotective, mom was killed, and dad will never not blame himself for that.” He sighs. “I know he probably went at it the worst possible way, but I understand why it’s not a life he’d wish on any of us. He has a hard enough time with Kathleen working in victim advocacy. I mean, it’s your life, but consider that he might have a point.”
“I’ve looked into it.” Eli shakes his head, because he has. “There aren’t that many jobs I can support a family on, without college. Not that many I can support a family on with college either, honestly. My inheritance from mom is tied up in trust until I’m 21.” Most of the joint property had gone to their dad, of course, but Eli was surprised, through the worst grief of his life, to find he was the sole beneficiary of his mother’s life insurance policy - in trust and to be used only for his education and any healthcare needs until he turned 21. “I can’t just leech off dad.”
“He’d be happy for you to, you know, if it means you’re safe and setting up your future in a way that doesn’t involve life threatening situations daily.” Rich points out, and Eli knows he’s right, and hates it anyway.
“I can’t. I did this thing, I need to handle the consequences.”
The slap upside his head isn’t hard, but still surprises him. “Hey!”
“Snap out of it, kid. The only voice telling you that you gotta handle the consequences of this alone is in your head. It’s a stupid damn voice, Eli. It’s a voice out of dad’s past, the voice that made two seventeen year olds get married when they weren’t even sure they were right for each other, and had dad keeping to a job that wasn’t his first choice for forty years.” Rich sounds dead serious. “Did you know he wanted to be an architect?”
“No…” But there had been - “You know, when we were packing up the apartment, I found a sketchbook, drawings of cathedrals and old buildings, all around Rome. Mom couldn’t do a stick figure. Dad can draw. Especially buildings. I think mom and him took a class at some point before covid, like as a ‘date night’ thing, and he just kept it up.” Eli is quiet for a beat. “Didja know grandpa used to hit him?”
Rich shrugs. “Not for a fact, but it was the 70’s, and like I said, grandpa was an asshole, so I’m not surprised if he did. He died before I was born, but Mo says they never went to visit him before, either. We weren’t in touch with Grandma B until we were all in high school, either. I didn’t even know she was still alive when I was a kid. Dad didn’t have parents to fall back on, other than mom’s mom when Mo and Kathleen were babies. You do. You don’t have to figure shit out alone, and dad can be judgy as fuck, but he doesn’t have a leg to stand on about you knocking your girlfriend up. Feel free to throw it in his face if he tries.”
With an inelegant snort, Eli leans back and finishes the last of his beer. “He’ll knock me on my ass.”
“Has he ever raised a hand to you? Ever?”
Eli has to admit that no, he never has. “I was afraid he might, when he got flashbacks, but no, you’re right. Still, though.”
“I threw it in his face a few times. But I was a little shit when I was a kid.” Rich gets up. “More beer? Ice cream or something?”
“Nah.” Feeling a little overwhelmed, Eli decides to switch gears. “Wait, when did you engage in this old family tradition? ‘Cause I can’t help noticing I only have two nephews and they’re both Mo’s.”
“Ah.” Rich pops the cap off a second beer and drains half of it in a long gulp. “That’d be my last year of college, when you guys were safely on another continent.”
Okay, entirely not the answer he expected. Fortunately this time there’s nothing liquid in his mouth. “Seriously?”
“Uh huh.”
“You never told mom and dad?”
“They didn’t need to know. Liz knew, of course - she called me before I could call her, always says me being stressed or upset gives her a migraine. But no, mom and dad would’ve complicated things.”
“Because they’d have insisted you marry her and have the baby?”
“They’d have expected it, maybe. Definitely would’ve given me a hard time about doing the honorable thing, as they saw it. But Megan was in her third year of med school and didn’t want to be a mother, then or at all, and I had zero intention of making her do anything she didn’t want to. Besides, I knew it was just a school thing, and not a life-long connection. I liked her, but I didn’t like her enough for ‘til death do us part’, and she sure as hell wasn’t interested in that. So I went with her to the consult and the clinic and I made sure she was okay afterwards, for a few weeks, until she told me she could handle it from there and to get lost. We’re still friends on Facebook, she’s in orthopedics, in Arizona, single and child-free and seems happy about it. Liz helped me get the money together for it, so mom and dad wouldn’t ask questions. I’ve been very, very careful since.”
“Dude.” That is…a lot. “That’s kinda rough.”
“When I have kids I’d rather it was with a woman who wants them, and wants to share her life with me. Anything else isn’t fair. Alicia and I are talking about it, we seem to have about the same ideas, at least.” For the first time, Rich looks away, and Eli whistles.
“Serious, huh? Move fast enough and mine and yours can play together.”
“Yeah, thanks but I’m not hitching my schedule to yours.” Rich reaches over to ruffle his hair, and Eli dodges successfully. “Anyway, think about what you actually want your future to look like, before you commit. Police academy isn’t easy, it’s much tougher than college, and being a junior beat cop sucks, I hear. You can afford to look for something better, or study something else. Make sure you really want it before you go for it, or you’ll burn out early and quit, or worse, burn out early and stay.”
Eli shakes his head, but not to oppose what Rich is saying. “I hear you. I guess I have time to decide.”
“At least another few months before you need to start buying baby things. If you really want this, dad’ll come ‘round eventually. But you gotta really want it, bro. Look at uncle Joey, out of the army after 20 years, with a drug problem and a job he probably could’ve gotten right out of school. You don’t wanna end up like that.”
“Yeah, no.” Damn. If this is what brotherly hangouts are always like, Eli’d rather limit himself to one every other month or so. “Next time you wanna hang out, let’s go to a ball game, or somewhere else that’s loud and bad for personal talks.”
Rich snickers. “You needed brotherly advice. Don’t tell Randall he was right, man has a big enough ego already. But I hope I gave you food for thought, yeah? By the way, d’you know if it’s a boy or a girl yet?”
“Too early. Few weeks more, we’ll let you know if you’re going to be an uncle or an auntie.”
The ensuing hair ruffle, which turns into a noogie, Eli doesn’t manage to dodge.
He sleeps better that night than he has every night since Becky’s home test came up positive.