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Wylan was going spare. He had three hours, gods help him, three measly hours in which to complete his art assignment, and why had he left it so late? He was actually going to die. He sat down on the green, under a tree, and seriously considered making up a face. Unfortunately, he had to have solid proof of his reference. Maybe he could ask someone else on the green if he could draw them? But who could he ask? No one looked like he could just go up and ask, ‘Hey, can I draw you?’ They either looked busy, or with their friends, or had their headphones in, and he really didn’t want to disturb them. A man walked past him, and then flopped down on the grass about five meters away. Wylan watched the ducks. Could he turn in a portrait of a duck? Would that count? Surely there’d be some praise for being Avante Garde, right? But no, the assignment was clear. A portrait of another human, in the medium of your choice. Gods, what was an art major to do?
He scanned the green again, and his eyes snagged on the man who’d walked past him, who was feeding the ducks peas. Peas, not bread. And that settles it for Wylan, he simply must get to know this icon of a man better, and if asking to draw him was the way he would get to have a conversation with him, then asking to draw him it would have to be.
Wylan still had to work up the courage to get up and walk the five meters over to the man, which took him almost ten minutes, but he did. Picked up his sketchbook, swallowed his nerves, and walked over to the man. He was tall, brown, out of peas, and wearing the hottest pink jeans Wylan had ever seen, and a crop top.
“Excuse me.” He said. “I hope I’m not interrupting you, but can I draw you? If you’re not busy, that is?”
The man looked up and tilted his head to the side. Wylan stopped thinking, except for ‘Oh fuck he’s hot.’ Because it was true. Because how, HOW did genetics alone create that face. Gods, he was beautiful. And then the man reached up and pulled out an earbud. “Sorry, what was that gorgeous?”
Wylan froze. The man smiled at him patiently, as Wylan desperately tried to reassemble his knowledge of the English language as fast as he possibly could. “Ah- Sorry, I ’m Wylan, can I draw you?”
“Oh. Like, right now?”
“Yeah, if that’s alright? It’s for my drawing class, it’s due in two and a half hours. I’m an art major.”
“I kinda gathered that.” The man said, checking his watch. “Yeah, alright, I have time. Is here alright or do you want me somewhere else darling?”
“Um… here’s probably good.”
“Alright neat. Are you gonna sit down? I’m Jesper, by the way. I study economics.”
“Economics?” Wylan repeated, sitting down next to him. “I would not have pegged you for that.”
“Yeah, but hey, I’m not changing my style just cause I’m doing a certain major. I get a bit of slack for it sometimes from my professors but I don’t care. They’re stuck up, and I look fabulous, so.”
“It suits you,” Wylan said, rooting around in his satchel for his pens. “Sorry, could you turn so your back is facing the duck pond for me?”
“You got it doll.”
“By the way, I saw you feeding the ducks peas earlier. I thought that was so cool. I really appreciate folks who know how to feed wild animals properly.”
“Yeah, well my mama raised me right. Oh wow, you’re just going straight in with the pen, no sketching in pencil first? You must be a professional.”
“Hardly. If I fuck up it’s over. So try not to move for me?”
“Oh sweetie you picked the wrong bitch if you want me to stay still. I am textbook ADHD.” Jesper laughed.
Wylan groaned slightly. “Okay. You can move if you need, I just might need to guide you back to position every so often.”
“That’s fine, and for you sweetheart I will do my utmost best to stay as still as possible.”
“Oh, well, thank you.”
“No problem. So, what do you do with your time? When you aren’t asking hapless students to help with your art homework?”
“I work a lot. Rent, you know? I play the flute. I visit my mum on the weekends. It’s a quiet life. What about you?”
“I’m in a band with my best friends, so occasionally we have small gigs around town, and practice is every other day, so I do that a lot. I work at the Uni Bar on the weekends that I don’t have gigs, and I go out a lot.”
“A band, really?”
“Yeah. We’re The Dregs, it’s me, my best friends Kaz and Inej, and then sometimes we get our friend Matthias in to help out with drums. I play guitar, Kaz sings, and Inej is on keys. We’ve got a gig tonight, actually, if you wanted to come? It’s at this club downtown, The Birdcage. Just say you know the guitarist of the main act. They’ll let you in.” Jesper winked.
Wylan smiled. “That sounds really nice. Sorry, could you just tilt your head just a little to the left for me?”
“Like this?”
“Your other left.”
“Oh.” Jesper laughed, readjusting his position. Wylan shook his head.
“No just- here, let me do it.” Wylan put his pen down and reached out, readjusting the other man’s shoulders. “There. Stay like that for me.”
“Course gorgeous.”
“No, you’ve moved your head.” Wylan shifted forward, grabbed Jespers’ chin gently, and tilted his face ever so slightly to the left. “Perfect. Now can you just stay still for me, darling?”
Jespers’ eyes shone with what might have been amusement, but he was suddenly as still as a statue. Wylan felt as though he had to rip his hand away to go back to his drawing. He could feel himself blushing furiously. Where on earth had the word ‘darling’ come from? Honestly just because Jesper was hot as fuck and had invited him to see his band play didn’t mean he liked Wylan. They barely knew each other. Wylan put pen to paper rather vigorously for a few moments before clearing his throat.
“So. This gig, when’s it happening?”
“It starts at nine, but you’re welcome to get there earlier, we’ll probably be there from seven thirty, Inej likes to set up early. But then we’ll probably mingle for like, forty-five minutes, get a couple drinks, and then we’re performing for two hours, so maybe get there around eight? Our friend Nina will be there supporting us, so you can hang with her while we perform.”
Wylan blinked. That was more information than he’d expected. “Alright. I guess I’ll see you then.”
“Mmm. You can tell me how your professor took this last minute assignment.”
“Yeah. I should get away with it. But when I’m done this, I need a photo of you to prove I didn’t just make someone up.”
“Oh? Something you’ve done before?”
“No! No, not me, it’s just the assignment rules.”
“Woah, relax sweetheart, I was joking. I didn’t mean to freak you out.”
“Right. Sorry. And could you shut your eyes for me real quick?”
“Yeah, of course. Don’t be sorry, by the way. We’re all chill here.”
“Yeah, I mean, you are letting me draw you, so I kinda figured. But thank you. You can open your eyes, by the way.”
Jesper’s eyes fluttered open, and Wylan’s heart damn near stopped. His tombstone would probably read something like: ‘Wylan Van Eck, so gay that he died trying to draw a pretty boy.’
Jesper had such pretty eyes though, like an overcast sky with the sun peeking through the clouds. He’d never get the colour right. But gods be damned he would try. He had to try. After all, he only had- he checked his watch -two hours left.
~~~
Wylan wasn’t a fan of going out. Like he’d told Jesper, he lived a quiet life. The parties he went to consisted of board games and old Disney and entirely too much pizza. But something else, deep inside him, said that he should go.
So that’s how he found himself walking up to a line at 7:50 pm, under a bright pink neon sign that presumably declared the establishment ‘The Birdcage.’ At 22 Wylan was WELL above age (Ketterdam’s legal age to drink was sixteen.) But he’d still bought just about every form of identification he could rustle up, bar his birth certificate. He didn’t know if Jesper had been joking about ‘knowing the guitarist,’ but he thought it was best not to press his luck. The bouncer let him in without question though, and Wylan found himself in a very loud, dark room, filled with people and flashing lights and a relentless drumbeat.
He pressed himself against the wall. Yeah, THIS was why he didn’t go out. It was too much, all at once, he wanted out. He probably could leave, he had no obligation to Jesper, they’d just met today, but- but he didn’t want to.
He found he wanted to stay, to watch the show and meet Jesper’s friends. To stick around because he’d spent two hours talking to the hottest man on earth and he desperately wanted more. More of that laugh, those eyes, the petnames, gods, the petnames, darling coming from Jesper and directed at him was just so fucking addicting. So he sucked it up and headed to the bar.
He was halfway through his Vodka Cruiser when a familiar voice called his name. He turned toward the sound, and there was Jesper, waving at him from by the stage. Mostly shirtless. He had a puffy, long-sleeved, neon green top on, (seriously what was his obsession with neon?) but it was open in the front and cropped about to halfway up his ribcage. It wasn’t even a shirt at that point. Wylan felt his face heat, but headed over to Jesper and his friends.
“Hey Jes!” He said, weaving around the last group of people.
“Hey darling!” Jesper smiled. Okay, so he was just actively trying to kill Wylan now. He might as well just write up an obituary now. “Guys, this is Wylan, the art student I was telling you about.” The little huddle of people around him waved politely, introducing themselves.
~~~
Wylan swallowed the last of his drink and cheered with the crowd as The Dregs finished up their final song and took a bow. It was clear that both the spotlight and the crowd adored them, from Inej’s chunky, bedazzled, platform boots, to the eyeliner Kaz had put on in the bathroom five minutes before they went on, to Jesper’s charmingly disabling, nothing-but-teeth smile. They’d loved Matthias too, in the few songs that he helped with, long blond hair done back in numerous little braids and charms. Nina slung an arm, covered in friendship bracelets, around his shoulders.
“They’re so talented!” She bawled in his ear, over the roar of the crowd.
“I know!” He yelled back. “And so hot too! How do you not just wanna fuck all of them?” Oh he was very tipsy now. He might be drunk. Nina’s first words to him had been ‘It’s lovely to meet you Wylan, I’m Nina, I’m horrendously bisexual, and if you ever need another model I’m here for you babes.’
“Restraint!” She called. “Wait wait, here they come!”
Indeed, the other four had trooped offstage to make way for a DJ who had a name with far too many Z’s and were winding their way through the crowd, covered in glitter and grinning, accepting congratulations as they passed. Nina whooped and threw herself at them as they came through the crowd, picking Inej up and spinning her around.
“You guys were AMAZING!!” She yelled. Inej giggled. Wylan hung back, but Jesper pulled him into his side.
“Drinks anyone?” He asked, sliding his hand around to Wylan’s waist. Wylan pressed up against Jesper’s side, warm and solid amongst the vague haze of the alcohol. He wouldn’t mind another drink. After the others expressed much the same thing, Kaz went up to the bar to collect their drinks. Wylan stayed with the group, Jesper’s hand still on his waist.
“Y’all are so fucking talented!” Nina crowed.
Wylan nodded empathetically. “It’s so good! I love your music!”
“And their style, huh Wylan?” Nina winked. Wylan laughed. Kaz came back with a tray of drinks and handed them round. The girls had convinced him to try a cocktail, and he had to admit, the colourful drinks looked more appealing than the beer Matthias had gotten.
“What was that wink for?” Inej asked, looking between him and Nina.
Wylan raised his eyebrows pointedly at Nina, who clearly didn’t get it, because she blurted out, “He said you’re all hot and asked me how I don’t wanna fuck all of you!”
Matthias and Kaz gasped. Nina doubled over laughing. Inej opened her mouth in shock, her eyes lit with laughter. And Jesper leaned down to purr in his ear, still loud enough for their whole circle to hear, “You think I’m hot?”
Wylan gasped. “No I- I’m drunk, I didn’t-“
“Drunk words are sober thoughts, Wylan.” Inej said, sagely.
“He’s a good model! He has good features!” Wylan said, indignantly. Jesper’s hands were slowly untucking his shirt and rapidly disassembling his argument.
“You weren’t looking at his features when you came over earlier.” Kaz smirked, raising one eyebrow.
“He was wearing slightly more clothes on the uni green, surprisingly!” Wylan said.
“It’s fine.” Matthias said, “Everybody is a little bit attracted to Jesper. He’s like Henry Cavill, even straight guys like him.” And then, under his breath, “I would know.”
Kaz let out a bark of laughter. “Still not convincing us you’re straight there Matty!” they said.
Inej smiled. “He’s been known to charm the lesbians.”
“Wait wait wait!” Kaz said, waving their arms in the air. “Never have I ever wanted to hook up with Jesper!” Everyone in the circle took a swig of their drink. Jesper squeezed Wylan's waist and laughed.
“Wait, aren’t you Ace though Kaz?” Inej asked.
“Aro, and you’re literally a lesbian.”
“He’s charmed the lesbians too, I just said that, he’s a menace!”
“Mmm, I’ve been told that I can be something of a devil sometimes.” Jesper hummed.
’Understatement.’ Wylan thought, as Jesper rested his chin on Wylan’s head. The other man was the sexiest bitch alive and if after all of this he didn’t end up in Jesper’s bed by the end of the week Wylan would die and then sue from beyond the grave for negligence. But now that he thought about it… did he know what Jesper’s sexuality was? He twisted in Jesper's arms, moving his drink out of the way awkwardly.
“Wait so like, everyone wants you, but, what are you into?” He said.
“Right now I’m into you, sweetie.” Jesper winked.
Wylan rolled his eyes. “No but like, who would you get with?”
“You.”
“He’s bisexual,” Kaz said, exasperatedly. “And a right dick sometimes, honestly Jes, give the art twink a break.” They took a sip of their drink. Wylan finished his cocktail with a small laugh.
“And what about you darling? What turns you on?” Jesper purred at him.
“Right now? Your hands. I’m gay as fuck.”
Jesper’s face split into a wicked grin.
“OKAY, that’s enough boys!” Nina said, loudly. “Step away from each other before I enforce a ‘leave room for Jesus’ rule.”
Jesper’s hands left his waist, and Wylan stepped away slowly and regretfully. When he looked back, Jesper had polished off the rest of his drink and was shooting him some serious puppy eyes. Nina just shook her head. Wylan pouted at her, but she stood in between him and Jesper with her arms folded pointedly.
~~~
The others were laughing, somebody had bought them a round of ciders, bottles had clinked and a toast was made, Nina and Inej had kissed just to spite them, Wylan was sure, and somehow they all ended up back at Jesper and Nina’s apartment, sitting on the couch while Kaz and Matthias bickered over what to watch.
Jesper was trying to get Nina to play nice and let him sit next to Wylan, but Nina wasn’t having it, insisting something about consent not counting when you’re drunk. Jesper, rightly enough in Wylan’s intoxicated mind, was insisting she was a cockblock. Inej meanwhile was painting Wylan’s nails and telling him very earnestly that he needed to find happiness in himself before he settled for a boy, and that he was one of the more genuine people she had ever met, and he should keep that quality close because it was precious. Wylan leant his head on the back of the couch and shut his eyes with a satisfied sigh. Someone’s chin dug into his shoulder, and he cracked an eyelid open. Jesper was leaning over him, hands creeping around his chest.
“Aren’t you supposed to be keeping like a meter and a half away from me at all times?” Wylan asked.
“Only when Nina’s in the room. She’s stepped out and I am stealing the time I can with you.” Jesper smiled.
“Well isn’t that romantic.”
“Wylan, what have I just been telling you?” Inej slurred.
“To be happy in myself before I settle for a man. I am happy with myself, Inej, university was the best decision I ever made! I’m out of my dad’s house, I’m headed to a career I love, I’m not ashamed of myself anymore, and I met you guys! I’m happy.”
“Oh I’m sorry that happened.” Inej said.
“Sorry what happened?”
“Whatever it was that made ‘getting out of your dad’s house’ so important.”
“Oh. Yeah, he was an asshole. Made me feel like shit for things I can’t even control.”
“Oh don’t tell me he was homophobic?” Nina said, coming back into the room. “Jesper, hands off the art twink. I’ll use the spray bottle.” Jesper flopped backwards onto the couch. Wylan gave Inej his other hand to paint.
“Oh he was. Transphobic, sexist, and racist too. Whole nine yards. Tried to kill me when I stopped hiding my dyslexia.” Kaz and Matthias went quiet. Jesper sat back up.
“Are- are you exaggerating?” Kaz asked. Wylan paused. Maybe he shouldn’t have said the last part of that sentence. Every eye was on him as he slowly shook his head.
“But I’m out now.” He said. “And I appreciate your concern, but I don’t wanna talk about it. Not right now anyway.”
“Of course,” Inej said. “But we’re always here if you do want to talk.”
“Yeah.” Matthias piped up. “A lot of us have shitty home lives too.”
“We support you Wylan. And we’re glad you got out.” Nina said.
Jesper took his hand without a word. Kaz disappeared into the kitchen for a moment and came back with a bottle of wine.
Nina gasped. “The trauma wine?”
“You know it.” Kaz said, pouring six full glasses. “We keep wine at all our houses for occasions like this. You don’t have to spill your trauma, you just gotta drink till you forget it.” They explained. Wylan shrugged and took the glass he was offered. “To forgetting the bad shit!” Kaz said, raising their glass.
“To forgetting!” The rest of them chorused.
~~~
Wylan forgot a lot that night. He forgot why he’d been afraid of going out. He forgot his teacher’s disapproving look when he handed in work that was obviously last minute. He forgot his father’s face and most of the hurt. He forgot he’d been assigned more homework. He forgot how to get home, but Nina let him sleep on the couch.
What he did remember was much better. The sound of everyone’s laughter. Jesper’s voice in his ear. The feeling of forgetting all of the bad things. His new friends. Jesper’s drunken goodnight kiss and a promise to catch up later ‘just the two of them.’ Jespers goodnight kiss, which was a proper, full-on kiss and the best thing in the world.