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When Pepper mentioned going to Gam's beach house to celebrate the successful release of their first independent album, everyone had agreed that it would be the perfect place to relax for a few days.
Pepper had promised them five rooms, direct access to a secluded beach and lots of fun activities. Everything was supposed to go smoothly. It was only when they arrived at the destination that Gam mentioned that one of the rooms was being renovated and there were only 4 rooms left.
The main room was apparently reserved for Gam and Pepper. The 2nd room for Thame and Po. The other three had to share a single room and another bedroom with a double bed.
It all started with a look, Nano, Dylan and Jun looked at each other, daring the others to speak first. Jun looked straight at Nano, trying to convey that he was fine with sharing with him and leaving the other bedroom to Dylan, but before he or Dylan could say anything, the youngest sprinted into the house. By the time they got over their surprise, it was too late to follow.
Nano jumped face first into the single bed just as Dylan arrived at the door, already panting from the short sprint.
"Come on Nano, don't do this," he hissed, failing miserably to sound nice and pleading.
That only made the younger one smile and turn on his side to look at his friends, while Jun came to Dylan's side.
"I guess you'll have to share," he teased with a pleased smile and winked at them.
He really enjoyed messing with them and Jun sometimes hated him for it.
Dylan looked at Jun quickly, contempt written all over his face, his eyes widening as Jun tried to convince Nano to share with him and leave the room to Dylan.
"I don't share with him," Dylan blurted, crossing his arms. "He snores."
Jun scoffed, running a hand through his dark hair. "I don't snore. You're the one who talks in your sleep."
Nano rolled onto his back and laughed. "This will be more entertaining than I thought."
Dylan stepped into the room and lowered his voice. "Nano, come on. You know I need my space. Remember that time on the tour bus when-"
"When you accidentally cuddled Jun in your sleep and then pretended to be disgusted the next morning?" Nano finished, his eyes gleaming with mischief. "Yeah, I remember. We all do."
They knew there was no point in arguing. Nano would not budge. He had been teasing them relentlessly for as long as they could remember, and it had only gotten worse since Jun had confessed that he might have a crush on their bandmate.
Huffing, Dylan stormed out of the room, his shoulder bumping into Jun's, but he didn't look back.
Grimacing, Jun massaged his shoulder. "You know what you're trying to do will never work, right?" Jun asked, crossing his arms and leaning against the door frame. "Dylan can't stand me."
Nano's smile only widened, a knowing glint in his eyes. "Is that what you think?"
Jun sighed and pushed himself off the doorframe. "That's what I know. The guy can barely look at me without scowling."
"Funny," Nano mused, rolling onto his stomach and resting his chin on his hands. "Because when you're not looking, he can't seem to take his eyes off you."
Jun opened his mouth to argue, but closed it again, which only made Nano push harder. "I'm giving you a perfect opportunity, don't waste it P'Jun."
What was he supposed to say? Thanks? He rolled his eyes and left the room with a sigh. He would have to make do with the situation and maybe, just maybe, Dylan wouldn't be a brat all the time and they would actually get along for once.
Dylan was already unpacking when Jun found the right room. He didn't even give him a glance, but continued with his work, a scowl taking over his features, the pout making his mouth the focus of Jun's attention. Shaking his head, he opened his suitcase on the floor and let the silence drag on until he couldn't stand it anymore.
"Look, man, I don't like this situation any more than you do, but if we can get past whatever I did to upset you this time, I'd appreciate it if we could bury the hatchet for the time we're here," he suggested.
Jun was really tired, and even more tired of arguing with Dylan half the time without knowing why. Especially when he really, really liked the guy.
"I'm not mad at you," Dylan mumbled. "I just don't like sharing my space."
God, Jun knew more than anyone else that Dylan needed his space because he did too, despite his cool attitude, but it had always felt like more than that when it came to him and Dylan.
"You don't like me," Jun said matter-of-factly, or at least trying not to show how defeated he was.
That earned him his first look since coming in, and Dylan looked genuinely surprised for a second before the usual frown took over his features again.
"You're not very likeable," he replied with something more like a tease than an antagonism, which made Jun fight back a smile. Maybe one day, they would find common ground.
"Whatever floats your boat," Jun replied, promising himself that by the end of this trip he would have turned the tables and made himself so likable that Dylan would have no choice but to say it out loud. That would be his goal.
"I'm floating just fine without your help," Dylan muttered, turning his back on Jun as he arranged his clothes in the dresser with unnecessary precision.
Jun watched him for a moment and noticed how Dylan's shoulders tensed when he felt Jun's eyes on him. Interesting. For someone who claimed not to like him, Dylan seemed remarkably aware of his presence.
"What side of the bed do you want?" Jun asked casually, unfolding a t-shirt.
Dylan froze, his hands hovering over a neatly folded pile of shirts. "I... the right side," he replied, his voice a little higher than usual.
Jun snickered. Nano would be pleased to know that they at least matched perfectly on that front.
"Perfect," was all he said before they went back to the silent treatment.
***
The evening came faster than Jun had expected. The group gathered on the deck overlooking the beach, string lights strung overhead casting a warm glow on their faces. Gam had prepared cocktails and Po was surprisingly manning the grill with ease, the smell of barbecue wafting through the air.
Jun sat in a lounge chair and tried not to notice that Dylan had chosen the seat farthest away from him. Nano kept shooting him knowing looks that made Jun want to throw something at him.
"To our first independent album," Pepper raised his glass, his smile beaming. "And to many more."
Everyone clinked glasses, the sound mingling with the waves crashing on the shore. Jun caught Dylan's eye across the circle, and for once, Dylan didn't look away. Progress, Jun thought, hiding his smile behind his glass.
Jun was careful not to drink too much. Not only did he need to be in full possession of his brain around Dylan, but he knew that alcohol never helped his insomnia. It had never gotten better, it didn't matter if he was still in his home country or far away, sleeping away from home was always a struggle. He was in no hurry to end the night, enjoying the warm breeze and the sound of the waves crashing on the shore.
He looked around, taking in the faces of his friends, all lost in their own jokes and conversations. Gam was teasing Pepper about his latest failed attempt at cooking; Po was laughing so hard he had to clutch his stomach.
Jun's eyes wandered back to Dylan. The usually uptight rapper was slowly loosening up, his laughter becoming freer, his gestures more animated. When Dylan actually laughed at something Jun said - a casual joke about their old manager's ability to take a nap anywhere - Jun felt a warmth spreading through his chest and something hopeful he wanted to cling to.
***
Nano was sprawled across a lounge chair, drink in hand, looking far too pleased with himself, while Dylan sat on the floor next to him, talking with his hands.
"P'Jun!" The man with the aforementioned name jumped when Nano called out to him.
"Come tell Dylan how much he sucks at video games," he asked with a grin. "He doesn't believe me."
"Because it's not true!" Dylan protested, crossing his arms and glaring at Nano with that damn pout that was slowly becoming Jun's kryptonite.
"Shall I remind you of the time you got angry and threw your controller at me?" Jun teased, playing along. Dylan's feigned indignation sent a wave of laughter through the group.
"That was one time!" Dylan protested, but there was a hint of a smile on his lips.
Jun moved over to join Dylan and Nano, sitting closer to them than he usually did. The proximity made Dylan noticeably tense, but he didn't move away. Jun took that as a victory.
The night passed in a blur of jokes and half-remembered stories. For once, it felt like old times, before things got complicated and they split off from ONER to find their own way and got so busy that none of them had time to really enjoy the process.
***
When Jun slipped into the bedroom later, Dylan was already stretched out on the bed, headphones on and eyes closed. Jun hesitated at the door, watching him for a moment longer than necessary before quietly moving to his side.
Once he was sure that Dylan was indeed asleep, he moved closer and carefully removed the headphones. Dylan shifted, mumbled something unintelligible, but didn't wake up. Jun placed the headphones and Dylan's phone on the nightstand, his heart doing a strange little flip-flop. He brushed a strand of silver hair away and stopped in his tracks, a big sigh escaping his lips. Dylan had no right to look so beautiful in his sleep.
He quickly changed, leaving only his sweatpants and a t-shirt on, and lay down on his side of the bed, staring at the ceiling, hoping that sleep would find him tonight.
The room was quiet except for Dylan's soft breathing and the relentless ocean waves outside. It should have lulled him to sleep, but Jun tossed and turned, hoping not to disturb Dylan's peace.
His head was a jumble of thoughts, from everything they had accomplished in the past year, to Nano's words earlier in the day, to the pouty lips that invaded his dreams more and more lately.
When Dylan rolled onto his back, Jun waited anxiously, but his bandmate's breathing quickly returned to its regular pattern. Jun hesitated between slipping out of bed and doing something useful or staying here to enjoy this quiet moment at Dylan's side.
When Dylan suddenly said "Jun", the person with the mentioned name stopped breathing and turned to look at the speaker's face. He had known for some time that Dylan sometimes spoke in his sleep, but he hadn't expected to hear his own name fall from his lips.
Heart pounding in his chest, Jun waited, his eyes riveted to his bedside partner despite the darkness surrounding them. Dylan grumbled, and Jun would bet he was pouting. His talk was mostly gibberish, but Jun's ears perked up at something that sounded a lot like handsome. Did Dylan find him handsome?
With a deep chuckle, Jun turned to the side and rested his head on his hand, concentrating as much as possible on the words coming out of Dylan's mouth. Most of it was unintelligible, but Jun tried anyway. A big sigh fell from Dylan's lips, followed by "so annoying," and Jun's smile disappeared.
He lay back down and stared at the ceiling. He felt a little deflated, like a balloon popped by a needle of truth. He knew that Dylan wasn't particularly fond of him, but he had almost let himself believe that they had made some kind of progress tonight.
Annoying, huh?
Jun grinned to himself. He would just have to improve his game. Dylan might be stubborn, but Jun was nothing if not determined.
***
The next day was bright and sunny, but a light breeze made it bearable, the perfect weather for outdoor activities. Jun was one of the first up, even though he had barely slept, and he decided to take advantage of the quiet morning by preparing breakfast for everyone.
He was busy chopping fruit when he heard shuffling behind him.
"Are you sick or something?" Dylan's voice came from the doorway. He looked adorably rumpled, his hair sticking out in all directions, his voice gravelly with sleep.
"Couldn't sleep," Jun replied, keeping his tone light. "Thought I'd do something useful." He gestured to the spread of toast and fruit on the table.
"That's a first," Dylan teased, but his tone wasn't harsh, it was almost playful, and Jun found it hard to suppress a smile.
Dylan grabbed a knife and went to work, helping to cut the mangoes. They worked side by side in silence, Jun occasionally stealing glances, a smile plastered on his face. He struggled to find words to say, but working in silence felt strangely comfortable and peaceful. Afraid of ruining the moment, Jun remained silent.
They went outside with trays of food and placed them on the table where everyone was gathered.
"Did you two work together in the kitchen without killing each other?" Nano asked mischievously, earning a glare from Jun, a silent warning not to stir up shit so early in the morning.
Dylan rolled his eyes, but smiled. "I know, right? Jun has been strangely cooperative."
"Maybe he hit his head," Po offered, reaching for a piece of toast.
Ignoring the teasing, Jun took a seat next to Dylan instead of the one on the other side. He didn't miss the wink Nano sent his way when Dylan didn't move or complain.
They all dug into their breakfast, easy conversation and laughter filling the warm morning air. Even with the chaos of everyone talking at once, Jun felt more peaceful than he had in a long time. He glanced at Dylan, who was arguing with Gam over the last piece of toast, and couldn't help but hope that maybe, just maybe, he wasn't the only one who felt like they could become something great if they dared to take a leap of faith.
Pepper had planned a full day of activities and games. Right after breakfast, they gathered on the patio for a game of drawing. To make the teams even, Gam had recruited her neighbor to play. As soon as the man entered the room, Jun knew that Nano would have a big crush on him and he made sure to tease him right back. An eye for an eye.
Of course, Jun and Dylan were on different teams, Jun with Thame, Po and Nano, while Dylan was with Pepper, Gam and the newcomer Diamond.
Jun's team lost. Badly. They had done well at first, but then Dylan went on a word guessing spree before anyone could even draw a line. It made Jun's competitive nature flare up, but the louder he got, the more Dylan laughed, and somehow that made losing almost worth it.
"Stop losing on purpose, you're making me look bad," Nano whispered after Jun guessed wrong for the umpteenth time.
"How dare you suggest that I would lose on purpose?" Jun answered with a dramatic hand to his heart.
He was having fun, there was nothing wrong with that.
"Please, the more Dylan laughs at your stupid answers, the stupider they get."
"I'm just warming up," Jun said, but Nano's words echoed his own thoughts. He kept looking at Dylan, who seemed more relaxed than he'd been in ages. His laughter was like music, and Jun found himself wanting to bottle it up and keep it forever.
***
After lunch they went to the beach to play volleyball. They split into teams again, but this time Jun managed to stay with Dylan. It was a hard-fought game; everyone was ruthless, but also laughing too much to take the scores seriously. Jun couldn't remember the last time he'd had so much fun, the pressure long forgotten.
He and Dylan worked surprisingly well together, as if their minds were connected, when one moved to the right, the other knew exactly where to go to cover the whole field. At least until it stopped. When they both jumped for the same ball and crashed into each other, falling into the sand in a tangle of limbs and laughter, Jun didn't even care that the other team scored. Lying next to Dylan, breathless and weightless, he felt like he'd already won something important when Dylan smiled at him.
When they were paired up again for the scavenger hunt, Jun didn't even care that Nano was their third wheel.
They tore through the list with wild energy, sprinting across the beach and through the house, chasing down clues. Jun was determined to win this one, if only to prove that they worked well together and were smarter than the rest. If Jun could keep Dylan's smile all to himself, that would be the icing on the cake, the cherry on top.
"Got it!" Dylan shouted, holding up a battered old flip-flop from behind a bush.
They were unstoppable. Even Nano's side comments couldn't distract them. Their usual back and forth worked wonders in uncovering clues.
"You two are disgustingly in sync," Nano complained, but his tone was more amused than anything else, and for once neither Jun nor Dylan had anything to say in return.
When they found the last item on the list, Jun and Dylan high-fived each other so hard it stung and roared in victory. Nano groaned dramatically, but his big smile betrayed him.
"Okay, okay," Gam conceded as they returned to the patio. "We get it. You guys are too good."
Dylan collapsed onto a lounge chair and Jun followed suit, collapsing next to him. They were both panting, but their exhilarated grins said it all.
"Teamwork makes the dream work," Jun said, nudging Dylan with his shoulder.
"I guess you're not so bad when you focus," Dylan admitted gracefully, stroking Jun's thigh once.
Jun's heart skipped a beat and he knew he was probably smiling like an idiot, but he didn't care. He stretched out on the chair and soaked up the sun and Dylan's presence. It was as if Dylan had gone from stormy weather to sunshine, and Jun soaked up every moment of it.
The last activity before dinner was much quieter and more in tune with their artistic side. They spread out on the terrace with canvases, paints and brushes. The sun was setting low, casting everything in a golden glow. Jun tried to concentrate on his painting, but kept sneaking glances at Dylan, who was working on an abstract splatter piece, his shirt already stained with bright colors.
"Looks like a rainbow threw up on you," Jun teased, dipping his brush into bright blue.
"Better than your blank canvas." Dylan flicked paint in Jun's direction, a challenging grin on his face.
Jun laughed and flicked some back. "Hey, it's called minimalism."
They fell back into companionable silence, the only sounds being the rustling of leaves and distant waves.
Nano and Diamond sat nearby, Nano whispering wildly while Diamond laughed and gently tried to shut him up. Jun smiled at the sight.
When they finally called it a day and went inside for dinner, Jun felt light and hopeful. Dinner went well, everyone chatted happily. When Dylan sat down next to him, Jun couldn't believe his eyes and smiled up at him stupidly, only to be met with a glare and a raised eyebrow.
"Are you broken?" Dylan asked confused.
"Malfunctioning," Jun replied, tapping the side of his head as if to solve the problem. He was rewarded with an eye roll and the hint of a smile, which was enough for him.
It was already dark when they finished eating, the night warm and inviting. Jun found himself back outside on the terrace, his mind racing but his body pleasantly tired. It had been such a great day, he didn't want it to end.
"Hey," Dylan said quietly, appearing at the door. "Everyone's getting ready for a game."
Jun's brain went blank. He had been so lost in his thoughts and the quiet night that he hadn't expected Dylan to look for him. "Oh. Right," he managed to say. "What kind of game?"
"Not sure. Nano said it's a surprise, which could mean chaos."
Jun nodded, trying to regain his composure. "I'm in."
"Today was fun," Dylan said as they walked back to the living room, Jun's footsteps stuttering. Was Dylan actually looking for a conversation... with him?
Jun glanced sideways at Dylan's impassive face, trying to pierce his thoughts. "Yes," he answered lamely for lack of words. "We - we make a great team."
His brain was screaming, begging Dylan to agree, to confirm that they were a great team and that Jun wasn't so bad after all. But they had already joined the others, and Nano wasted no time in grabbing their arms and forcing them to sit in the circle.
Unfortunately for Jun, the only seats left were on opposite sides and he found himself sitting not next to Dylan but directly across from him. Whether that was better or worse remained to be seen, but at least he could look at him without fear of being teased for stretching his neck.
Nano handed them drinks before clapping his hands and announcing that they would play "Never have I ever", which drew groans from his audience, but no one dared to argue with the idea.
"Get ready to spill your darkest secrets," Nano teased, raising his glass.
Diamond started things off with a tame question that broke the ice and got everyone talking more. It didn't take long for the game to heat up and become boisterous as they moved around the circle. When it was Dylan's turn, he looked pensive for a moment.
"I've never... broken a bone."
Jun lowered his drink in triumph. "I'm indestructible," he declared, drawing a chuckle from Dylan.
The questions continued, each revealing tiny pieces of their lives, and Jun felt like he was learning new things about his friends. Like how both Nano and Dylan had had crushes on teachers, or how Gam was afraid of fire. Every personal detail was like a treasure, and Jun put them all in a box in his head.
"My turn!" Nano announced happily. "I've never lost on purpose before."
Jun coughed and took a drink, glaring at Nano, who looked all too pleased with himself.
Dylan's sneer echoed sweetly around the room, "Of course you did, loser!" and Jun couldn't even pretend to be angry because Dylan's teasing made his heart flutter.
They went around the circle, the statements getting more and more outrageous. Dylan was animated, throwing in questions like "I've never crashed a wedding" and laughing when Diamond and Gam both took drinks. Every time Jun caught Dylan's eye, it felt like the night was sparkling around them.
Jun held his breath with each of Nano's turns, afraid of how he would tease him next. He was right, because the next question made him blush two shades of red. "I've never been attracted to my bandmate."
Jun stuttered and swallowed what was left of his beer, the bitter taste burning his tongue. A chorus of cheers and laughter filled the room. Dylan raised his eyebrows in mock shock before holding up his beer as if toasting Jun and taking a sip without breaking eye contact.
Jun blinked, trying to process what had just happened. Did Dylan...? His mind raced, but before he could say anything, Thame moved on and Dylan looked away.
Jun held up his empty beer bottle as if in surrender, then took the time to get a new one to calm his heartbeat.
The game continued, everyone getting more animated and wilder. Jun began to relax again, especially when Nano ran out of incriminating questions about him. Finally, the game ended.
"That was ridiculous," Dylan said, shaking his head but smiling.
"Ridiculously funny!" Nano corrected.
"We're going to bed." Pepper said, pulling Gam up.
Po and Thame followed shortly after, while Nano accompanied Diamond to the door, leaving Jun and Dylan as the last ones in the room. Jun shifted awkwardly, unsure if he should say something or just let the night end quietly.
But then Dylan broke the silence. "Do you want to stay out here for a while?"
He played with his beer bottle, pulling down the etiquette. He looked soft, beautiful, his cheeks flushed with laughter and alcohol, and Jun wanted him more than ever.
"Yes," Jun answered too quickly, trying not to sound too eager. He leaned back on his hands while Dylan sat cross-legged on the floor across from him.
It was quiet, neither of them said anything, but Jun didn't feel out of place or uncomfortable. Jun watched as Dylan traced a finger along the rim of his beer bottle, his expression pensive. Dylan looked up at the ceiling, a half-smile playing on his lips.
"You know, you surprised me today." He finally said quietly.
"How so?" Jun tried to keep his voice casual, despite the way his pulse was quickening.
Dylan shrugged, his fingers still fidgeting with the beer bottle. "I don't know. Less arrogant. Freer. Funnier."
Jun couldn't help but smile, feeling warmth in his chest at Dylan's words. "Are you admitting that I'm fun to be around?" he teased, leaning forward slightly.
Dylan rolled his eyes but didn't deny it. "Don't let it go to your head."
"Too late," Jun replied, tapping his temple. "I'm already cataloging this moment: Dylan admits Jun is fun. Historic event."
The silence was comfortable, easy, and Jun loved the idea of spending more time with Dylan like this.
"So," Jun ventured after a moment, "who in the band were you attracted to?" He tried to keep his tone light, teasing, but his heart pounded against his ribs.
Dylan's lips curled up. "Who says it was just one person?"
Jun laughed, the sound coming out shakier than he intended. "Playing the field, huh?"
Dylan shook his head and chuckled softly. "No, not playing the field. Just..." he paused, taking a sip of his beer, "being honest with myself."
The atmosphere shifted, something electric and fragile hanging between them. Jun leaned forward, his voice dropping.
"Honest about what, exactly?"
Dylan met his gaze, his usual defenses nowhere to be found. "You know you're handsome, you don't need me to tell you that."
Jun's breath caught in his throat. In all the scenarios he'd imagined, he'd never thought Dylan would be so direct.
"Maybe I do," Jun said quietly, setting his beer down on the floor next to him. "Maybe I need to hear it from you."
Dylan looked away, his profile illuminated by the soft glow of the lights above them. "You're impossible," he murmured, but there was no bite to his words.
"And yet here you are, telling me I'm handsome." Jun's confidence returned, fueled by the way Dylan's eyes kept finding his despite his obvious attempts to look elsewhere.
"I said you know you're handsome," Dylan corrected, but a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. "There's a difference."
Jun moved closer, closing some of the distance between them. Dylan held Jun's gaze, the playful defensiveness in his eyes trapping Jun. Jun couldn't stop himself from moving forward, hope coursing through his veins like liquid power.
Dylan stood still, watching him with his guard still up. Jun moved as close as he could, blocked by Dylan's crossed legs. His heart was beating so loud he bet Dylan could hear it, too. Patiently, he waited for something, for a sign that Dylan wanted this too, but the other man remained silent.
It was torture to be so close to those inviting lips. Up close, Jun could see every detail he hadn't noticed before - the small scar near Dylan's lower lip, the mole on the tip of his nose, the way his eyes weren't just brown but flecked with gold, the way his breath hitched slightly when Jun leaned in.
"Can I kiss you?" Jun asked with his heart in his throat, the anticipation making his heart race and his body flush.
Jun didn't need words to know the answer, it was clear in the sad smile that adorned Dylan's beautiful features.
"No," the latter replied, softer than necessary.
A very simple word that stung and shattered Jun's fragile facade. Jun felt as if he had been slapped, the air knocked out of his lungs. He leaned back, trying not to show how much the rejection hurt. "Oh," he managed, forcing a smile that felt like walking on broken glass.
Dylan tilted his head, seemingly surprised by Jun's retreat, but he made no move to keep him there or to show that he had changed his mind.
"We should... hm - we should go to bed," Jun said before grimacing at the implication he hadn't meant.
If he could, he would gladly jump into a hole in the ground and hide from his embarrassment.
"I mean, separately. Or, well, in the same bed, but... you know what I mean," Jun stammered, wishing the ground would swallow him whole.
Dylan nodded, his expression unreadable. "Yeah, it's getting late."
The walk back to their room was silent, the tension between them palpable. Jun looked ahead, trying to ignore the burning sensation in his chest. What had he been thinking? Of course, Dylan would reject him. One good day didn't erase years of the complicated relationship they had built.
When they reached their room, Jun grabbed his toiletries without looking at Dylan and headed straight for the bathroom. He needed space, needed to collect himself before he faced Dylan again.
Once safely behind the locked door, Jun leaned against the sink and exhaled shakily. His reflection stared back at him, flushed and frustrated. He was an idiot.
Under the cool spray of the shower, Jun closed his eyes and let the water wash over him, hoping it would take away his embarrassment.
After what seemed like an eternity, Jun emerged from the bathroom in his pajamas, his hair still damp. Dylan was sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at his phone, but Jun could tell that he wasn't really doing anything. He was just scrolling to avoid looking at Jun, which made him want to bang his head against the wall. Had he already ruined all the progress he had made during the day?
Dylan didn't look in his direction before taking his turn in the bathroom. Jun hid under the covers, praying that sleep would come quickly, even though he knew he'd probably be awake most of the night.
Jun lay perfectly still, pretending to be asleep when Dylan returned. He heard the soft padding of feet on the floor, felt the dip of the mattress as Dylan settled on his side of the bed. The lamp clicked off, plunging the room into darkness.
Minutes stretched. Jun's eyes remained stubbornly open, his mind replaying the rejection on a loop. The soft sound of Dylan's breathing should have been soothing, but instead it was a constant reminder of how close, yet unreachable he was.
"I know you're awake," Dylan's voice cut through the silence, making Jun tense.
Jun considered keeping up his charade, but sighed instead. "Yeah."
"You always have trouble sleeping in new places," Dylan observed.
It wasn't exactly newsworthy, they all knew that. They had dealt with his insomnia more than once. Still, Jun was surprised that Dylan remembered that detail about him. "My brain never shuts down," he admitted quietly.
The silence stretched between them again, more uncomfortable than before.
"I'm sorry," Jun finally said, staring at the ceiling. "About before. I didn't mean to make things weird."
Dylan shifted and turned in Jun's direction, even though they could barely see each other in the darkness.
"You didn't make things weird, Jun." It was probably the softest thing Jun had ever heard him say, and somehow it made him want to curl up in a ball and cry.
"You felt something, wanted to act on it, asked my permission and respected my wishes."
Jun swallowed hard, unable to come up with a good answer. He knew that Dylan was right. He had done everything right, but the rejection still stung.
"Thank you, by the way. You're a shameless flirt, but you're a good guy, Jun." If he had not been so depressed, Jun would probably have laughed to hear a compliment fall from Dylan's lips. He should have felt giddy, but instead he felt empty.
Dylan was silent for so long that Jun thought he might have fallen asleep. Finally he spoke again, with an apologetic tone, "If anything, I should be the one to apologize for leading you on.
"You have nothing to apologize for," Jun replied immediately and sympathetically. "I'm fine, you're fine, nothing happened, case closed, okay?"
Jun could not bear to talk about it anymore. It didn't help, it just made him feel even worse.
"Okay." Dylan said simply before turning his back on Jun again.
Jun stared at the silhouette of Dylan's shoulders, the rise and fall of his breath. He wanted to reach out, to touch him, to ask why, if Dylan was attracted to him as the game had suggested, he'd said no. But Jun respected boundaries, and Dylan had clearly drawn his.
Sleep eluded Jun for hours. He listened to the waves outside, counted sheep and tried to clear his mind. When exhaustion finally claimed him, his dreams were filled with a silver-haired boy with beautiful lips, almost touches, and unspoken words.
***
The morning came too fast. Jun woke to an empty bed, the sheets on Dylan's side already cold. He blinked at the sunlight streaming through the windows, feeling groggy and disoriented. The events of the previous night came rushing back and he groaned, burying his face in his pillow.
The smell of coffee finally lured Jun out of bed. He took his time getting ready, dreading the inevitable awkwardness that awaited him. When he finally emerged from his room, he found everyone gathered around the breakfast table on the patio, the mood light and cheerful.
Dylan was sitting between Pepper and Po, laughing at something on Po's phone. He glanced up when Jun appeared and gave him a casual nod before returning his attention to the screen. The simple acknowledgement felt like both a relief and a disappointment.
"There he is!" Nano called out. "Sleeping Beauty finally graces us with his presence."
Jun forced a smile and slid into the only available seat, directly across from Dylan. "Morning."
Gam pushed a cup of coffee towards him. "Rough night?"
Jun's eyes flickered to Dylan for a split second. "Just the usual insomnia."
"A day at the beach will make you feel better!" Pepper exclaimed happily.
Jun seriously doubted it. How could seeing Dylan half naked make things better?
He took his time eating breakfast, letting the others get ready while he hovered around the table, nitpicking the food more than eating it. He waited until he was sure that Dylan wasn't around to enter their bedroom again to get ready.
Not even five seconds later, Nano barged in and locked the room after closing the door behind him.
"You want to tell me what happened last night?" Nano asked, falling onto the bed with his arms crossed. "You're acting weird, and Dylan looks like he's trying too hard to act normal."
Jun was busy rummaging through his bag. "Nothing happened."
"Bullshit," Nano replied flatly. "I left you two alone on purpose."
Jun sighed and stood up to face his friend. "Fine. I tried to kiss him, he said no, end of story."
Nano's eyes widened. "He said no? But he made heart eyes at you all day!"
"Well, apparently heart eyes don't mean you want to kiss me," Jun muttered, pulling out his swim shorts with more force than necessary.
Nano frowned, processing that information. "That doesn't make sense. I could have sworn..."
"Look, it's okay," Jun said forcefully, but it was very much not okay.
It had taken him a while to come to terms with the fact that he liked Dylan. It had taken even longer for Nano to convince him that Dylan might feel something, too. But last night clearly had been proof that nothing would come of it, and Jun had to accept that.
"P'Jun, please don't give up now." Nano said nicely. "Have you talked to him? Maybe it's not the best way to go straight to kissing. You have to get to know him first."
Jun scoffed because he already knew Dylan. "Am I supposed to make small talk with someone I've known for years?"
"You know that's not what I meant. Have you ever talked to him, really talked to him?"
Jun paused, thinking about Nano's words. Had he really spoken to Dylan? Sure, they had worked together for years, exchanged thousands of words, but most of their interactions had been colored by their strange antagonism or had been superficial at best. In fact, the night before had been the first time either of them had been open and honest.
"What would we even talk about?" Jun asked, frustration creeping into his voice.
"I don't know, maybe start with something simple or just ask him why he keeps acting like he can't stand you when he's clearly attracted to you?" Nano suggested with a raised eyebrow.
Jun ran a hand through his hair and sighed deeply. "Maybe he's just not that into me."
"Or maybe he's afraid," Nano countered. "Have you ever thought about that? Dylan overthinks everything. He probably has a million reasons why getting involved with you is a bad idea."
It was true that Dylan analyzed everything to death. But what could he be afraid of?
"Just... talk to him. Really." Nano stood up and squeezed Jun's shoulder. "But first, put on your swimming trunks. And for God's sake, look hot. Remind him what he's missing."
Jun couldn't help but smile at Nano's advice. His friend was incorrigible, but maybe he had a point.
"Fine," Jun conceded and grabbed his swim shorts. "I'll talk to him. But I don't expect anything."
Nano grinned triumphantly. "That's all I ask."
After Nano left, Jun quickly changed into his black swim trunks, which he knew showed off his legs well. He topped it off with a loose white button-up left open, a small act of defiance against his bruised ego. If Dylan didn't want him, fine, but Jun wasn't going to make it easy for him to ignore him either.
When he finally joined everyone on the beach, the scene before him was picturesque. Pepper and Gam were already in the water, while Thame and Po had set up a small volleyball net. Dylan sat under a tree, engrossed in a book, his silver hair catching the sunlight where it streamed between the shady leaves.
Jun caught Nano's eye, who gave him an encouraging nod from where he was applying sunscreen to Diamond's back. Taking a deep breath, Jun walked across the hot sand towards Dylan. He dropped his towel nearby, far enough to give Dylan space, but close enough to make his presence known.
"Good book?" Jun asked casually, sitting down on his towel.
Dylan looked up, his eyes widening slightly behind his sunglasses as they took in Jun's appearance before quickly returning to his book. "It's okay."
Jun lay back on his towel and closed his eyes against the bright sun. "I didn't know you were such an avid reader."
Dylan put the book down and eyed him suspiciously. "What is this? What are you trying to do?"
Jun leaned on his elbows and tried to meet Dylan's suspicious look. "I want to talk to you. Get to know you better."
"After four years?" Dylan scoffed.
"Better late than never," Jun replied with a shrug. The breeze ruffled Dylan's silver hair and Jun had to force himself not to stare. "So, what's the book about?"
Dylan hesitated, his fingers tracing the cover. "It's about a musician who loses his hearing and has to rebuild his life." He paused, looking almost surprised at himself for sharing. "It's... really good, actually."
"Sounds intense," Jun said, genuinely interested.
Dylan hummed, his face turned to the sun, soaking it up. How could Jun not have fallen for him when he looked so gorgeous? Dylan's side profile was mesmerizing, and Jun found himself lost in him, not even hiding how he was staring.
"I thought you'd avoid me after last night." Dylan finally said after a while, still staring ahead.
Jun sat up and pulled his knees to his chest. "Why would I avoid you?"
Dylan gave him a sharp look.
"Look," Jun sighed, "I'm not going to make things awkward just because you turned me down. We're bandmates. Friends even, on good days." He paused to gauge Dylan's reaction. "Besides, I'd like to think we made some progress yesterday."
Dylan seemed to consider this, his expression softening. "We did," he admitted quietly. "It was... nice. Not fighting all the time."
Jun felt a wave of hope at Dylan's words. "So why go back to the way things were?" he asked. "We could try to be friends. Real friends who talk and don't just tolerate each other."
Dylan studied him for a moment, testing the word on his tongue. Jun was hanging on his lips, both figuratively and literally. "Friends," Dylan said, as if trying to see how the word felt in his mouth.
"I guess I could use another friend," he agreed, holding out his hand for Jun to shake.
Wrapping his hand around Dylan's fingers shouldn't have made his heart race. But it did. The touch lingered, neither pulling away until Pepper's cry broke the moment.
"Jun! Dylan! Come play volleyball!" he called, waving enthusiastically.
Dylan pulled his hand away first, placing a bookmark between the pages. "We should join them."
"Yeah," Jun agreed, trying to ignore the lingering warmth on his palm. "We should."
They walked towards the net together, the silence between them not quite comfortable, but no longer strained. Jun noticed Dylan stealing glances at him as he took off his shirt, quickly looking away when Jun caught him.
"Teams!" Po announced as they arrived. "Diamond, Nano and I against Thame, Jun and Dylan."
Jun felt a flutter in his stomach at being paired with Dylan again and smiled. Nano gave him a not-so-subtle wink from across the net.
As the volleyball game intensified, Jun found himself hyperaware of Dylan's every move. The way he called for the ball, the hunch of his shoulders as he sent it over the net, the triumphant smile when they scored a point. It was maddening.
"Eyes on the ball, Jun!" Thame yelled as Jun missed an easy return, too distracted by the drops of seawater glistening on Dylan's collarbone.
"Sorry," Jun mumbled, feeling a heat rise in his cheeks that had nothing to do with the sun.
Dylan tapped him lightly on the shoulder. "Focus," he said, but his lips curved into a small smile that made Jun's heart stutter.
The rest of the day passed in a blur, with Jun constantly either hovering around Dylan, asking him stupid questions, or admiring him from a distance. He was so obvious that even Thame seemed to have noticed his strange behavior, but Jun had reached a point where he didn't care who knew.
Each of Dylan's reactions during the day had only strengthened Jun's desire to make him give in. There was something undeniable there and he longed for Dylan to be on the same wavelength.
The sun was beginning to set when they finally collapsed onto their towels, exhausted from hours in the sun and in the sea. Jun was pleasantly tired, his muscles aching from the volleyball game they'd eventually lost after Dylan tripped over his own feet trying to save a particularly difficult shot. The memory of catching Dylan before he hit the sand, their bodies pressed together for that brief moment, still lingered on Jun's skin.
"You're staring again," Dylan murmured, eyes closed as he lay on his towel.
Jun didn't bother to deny it. "Just admiring the view."
Dylan's lips quirked slightly, but he kept his eyes closed. "Part of your new 'get to know me' campaign?"
"Something like that," Jun replied, drawing patterns in the sand next to his towel. "Is it working?"
Dylan finally opened his eyes and turned his head to look at Jun. His heart sank at the sad look on Dylan's face, but he kept a straight face, waiting for whatever came out of Dylan's mouth.
"I appreciate the effort, Jun, and I like spending time with you. Always have, if I'm being honest..." Dylan trailed off, not finishing his sentence, but the rest was loud and clear. But I can't give you what you want.
Jun sighed and ran a hand behind his neck, trying to get rid of the tension in his body. "I know I'm a flirt and I've been ogling you all day," Dylan chuckled at the admission, and Jun smiled, "but I respect you too much to jeopardize our relationship and our work because of some stupid, out of nowhere crush. It'll pass."
The lie tasted bitter on his tongue. The more time he spent with Dylan, the clearer it became that this wasn't just a phase.
Dylan's face shifted, a flicker of something Jun couldn't name crossing his features before he covered it. "Right. Of course." He sat up, brushing the sand from his arms. "It's just a crush. These things happen."
The silence stretched between them, heavy with unspoken words. In the distance, the laughter of their friends carried on the breeze, contrasting with the sudden tension surrounding them.
"We should probably get back," Dylan finally said, gathering his things. "The others are starting to pack."
Jun nodded, not trusting his voice. When Dylan stood up, Jun impulsively reached out and caught his wrist. "Dylan, wait-"
Dylan looked down at Jun's hand on his skin as if it burned him, then met his eyes. "What?"
"I just..." Jun hesitated, pulled his fingers away, searching for the right words. "I don't want to go back to the way things were. Even if - just don't shut me out, okay?"
Dylan's expression softened, the tension in his shoulders easing slightly. "I won't," he promised. "But Jun, I think we have to be careful here."
Jun nodded, forcing himself to accept this small victory. At least Dylan didn't push him away completely. "Careful is my middle name," he joked weakly.
That earned him a snort from Dylan. "Says the man who jumped off a stage into the crowd without warning security on the last tour."
"That was different," Jun protested, picking up his towel and shaking off the sand. "The energy was right."
They walked back to the others in companionable silence, close enough that their arms occasionally brushed. Each brief contact sent a jolt through Jun's body that he tried desperately to ignore.
Dinner that night had been a lively affair, with overlapping conversations, laughter all around and lots and lots of teasing, especially aimed at Jun, but he was used to it.
Before he had time to process everything, the day was over and everyone jumped into bed.
Needing some time alone, Jun busied himself with washing the dishes that didn't fit in the dishwasher and cleaning up the messy kitchen.
He was in deep trouble. Being attracted to Dylan? Not really a problem. It had been clear from their first meeting that sparks had flown. Dylan was gorgeous with his chubby lips, little eyes and angry kitten personality. That was something Jun could handle very well. He had met a lot of beautiful people in his life, but that didn't mean anything.
No, the point was that he liked Dylan. He liked it when Dylan made fun of him, he liked it when Dylan acted all nonchalant when Jun knew that he cared more than he let on, he liked it that Dylan was so passionate and knowledgeable about music. He even liked that Dylan was old-school enough to write on paper instead of using his phone like everyone else.
Now that he was paying more attention and getting to know him? It only got worse. Jun was detail-oriented, so of course he noticed things. For example, how Dylan had at least three different smiles. The smirk he wore most often when he was around Jun or someone he liked to tease, which Jun guessed was the equivalent of his own grin, which often pissed people off even more. Then there was the full smile that showed genuine laughter and happiness. A smile he did not wear as often as Jun would have liked. But the last one, the last one Jun had noticed only recently. A shy smile that was barely visible if you didn't pay attention. Jun had seen it several times today, mostly when someone surprisingly paid attention to Dylan or gave him a compliment he hadn't expected.
Jun's problem with realizing all this? He wanted to be the one to bring those smiles to life the most. He had spent the day cataloging every single one of them, taking a mental picture and a note explaining what he had done or said to make Dylan smile. He was slowly becoming addicted.
He was in deep trouble because the more he noticed things and spent time with Dylan, the more he liked him and he was dangerously close to feeling something stronger than friendship and attraction. It almost felt like Nano's advice was backfiring on Jun. Instead of making Dylan fall in love with Jun, it was making Jun fall in love with Dylan. Hard. Quickly. Consuming his every thought.
The house was eerily quiet when he went to bed. As he had hoped, Dylan was already fast asleep. The light from his phone, which he used to navigate around the room, illuminated Dylan's features just enough for Jun to see the soft hair falling over his eyes and the parted lips that let out his soft breathing. Something twisted in Jun's gut, a silent pain at not being able to sleep, but at not being able to sleep next to someone so beautiful on a regular basis.
He quickly grabbed his things and ran to the bathroom, afraid that he would not be able to resist the sleeping beauty.
Under the spray, with his eyes closed and the water drowning out the noise, he let himself relive the entire day. It was easy, so easy, to imagine Dylan's body, from his messy gray hair to the sweat glistening on his pale skin despite the sun shining brightly over their heads. Jun could picture the tiny, but oh so graspable waist perfectly. He could still feel how his sweaty skin had brushed against his on several occasions. Far from being uncomfortable, Jun longed for more.
Maybe he shouldn't be doing this, especially with the object of his desire, his friend, right behind the door, but he let his hands roam over his body, letting the feelings flow and be washed away by the water, the sound of the spray muffling any signs of what he was doing. One time, just this one time, to regain control of his body and mind before pretending that he didn't want more, that he hadn't already fallen far too deep to go back.
Should he feel guilty about the water washing down the drain, the proof of what he had just done? Maybe, but he couldn't bring himself to feel it, because it had helped him to come to terms with it. And as he slipped into bed, he managed not to be overly aware of Dylan's proximity.
On the verge of sleep, his brain picked up Dylan's changing breathing pattern and the muffled words coming out of his mouth. Jun tried to ignore it, but when the words got a little louder, he woke up completely. Was Dylan rapping in his sleep? Jun strained to listen, trying to make sense of the jumbled words. When the words became clearer, Jun held his breath, his attention now fully focused.
“Are you flirtin’ or just friendly? Man, I can’t decide
One day, we electric, next, it’s colder than the sky
Tell me what’s the deal, am I readin’ this all wrong?
Or am I just a verse in the game that you prolong?
Are you playin’ me or stayin’ with me?
Heart's on the line, but you’re changin' quickly
One day, it’s tempting, next day, it’s tricky
So tell me now, are you real or risky?
I ain't tryna fall for a shadow in disguise
But every time I leave, you pull me back inside
Tell me honestly, is it me you really see?
Or am I just a player in your fantasy?
Are you playin’ me or stayin’ with me?
Heart's on the line, but you’re changin' quickly
One day, it’s tempting, next day, it’s tricky
So tell me now, are you real or risky?”
Jun froze while his heart doubled in rhythm. Was this song about him, about their relationship? Had Dylan written it before or was it something new his sleepy brain had come up with?
The silence returned as Dylan sighed and turned on his side, his back now to Jun. After years of working together, Jun shouldn't be surprised, but he was still amazed by Dylan's ability to write songs and rap them as if his life depended on it.
He waited, eager to know if there would be more to come, but eventually sleep claimed him, an exhaustion that he couldn't fight.
His eyes opened wide as he heard the sound of rustling sheets and heavy breathing from Dylan's lips.
"No... can't... please..." Dylan mumbled, shifting restlessly under the sheets.
Jun propped himself up on one elbow, unsure if he should wake him. The sun was already streaming through the curtains, allowing him to see Dylan's face, scrunched up in discomfort, his breathing becoming more and more erratic.
"Dylan?" Jun whispered, reaching out hesitantly.
Dylan's next words came out clearer, tinged with fear. "Don't go, Mom!"
Dylan's voice became more and more agitated and Jun couldn't stand it anymore.
"Dylan, Dyl', wake up."
He shook his shoulder violently. Dylan jerked awake with a gasp, his eyes wild and unfocused. For a moment, he stared at Jun without recognition, still trapped in whatever nightmare had gripped him.
"Hey," Jun said softly, keeping his hand on Dylan's shoulder, rubbing soothing circles on the side of his neck. "It's okay. It's just me, it's Jun. You had a bad dream."
Awareness slowly returned to Dylan's eyes, quickly followed by embarrassment. He sat up, pulled away from Jun's touch and ran a trembling hand through his disheveled hair.
"Sorry," he murmured, his voice husky with sleep. "Did I wake you?"
Jun shrugged as if it was no big deal, "Don't worry about it. Are you okay?"
Dylan nodded stiffly, but the pallor of his face and the trembling in his hands gave him away. "It's nothing. Just a stupid dream."
All of them knew parts of Dylan's life story before they became an idol band, but Jun had never pressed for more than what Dylan had told them back then about not having a family anymore. His curiosity was piqued now, but Jun knew that Dylan probably didn't want to say anything.
Nevertheless, he asked because he cared. "It might not be what you want to hear right now, but if you want to talk about it, I'm all ears."
To his surprise, Dylan replied, "Maybe later."
That was more than Jun had hoped for, so he couldn't help the smile that spread across his lips and hid it by falling back onto his pillow with a groan. He was fully awake now and there was no way he was going to sleep again.
"I'm sorry I kept you from sleeping more," Dylan apologized after he had regained his composure and lay on his side to face Jun.
Jun's eyes met Dylan's in the soft morning light. "I didn't sleep well anyway," he admitted. "Besides, what are friends for, if not to wake you from nightmares?"
Dylan's lips curved into that shy smile, the third one, the one that made Jun's heart flutter traitorously. "I guess that's true."
For a moment, they just lay there, facing each other, the morning silence around them except for distant bird calls and the gentle sound of the waves. Jun couldn't help but marvel at how different this was from yesterday morning, the awkwardness replaced by something fragile but warm.
They moved only when they heard movement outside, the real world making itself known in the form of Thame's laughter. Neither said a word as they rose and walked side by side to the kitchen, closer and lighter than usual.
"Morning, lovebirds," Nano sang as they entered the room.
Jun shot Nano a warning glare, while Dylan simply ignored the comment and headed straight for the coffee pot. The kitchen was filled with the others preparing breakfast, the smell of eggs and toast wafting through the air.
Jun was busy grabbing a bowl and cereal, painfully aware of Dylan moving around him in the kitchen, their bodies occasionally brushing in the confined space. Every accidental touch sent tiny jolts through Jun's system that he tried desperately to ignore.
"What's the plan for today?" He asked, trying to change the subject.
His relatively good mood crumbled with every answer. Pepper and Gam wanted to go hiking before a romantic dinner. Thame and Po wanted to spend the day together sightseeing in the nearby city. Neither couple sounded particularly interested in sharing their time with others today.
Jun turned to Nano with hopeful eyes, but he didn't need any words to know that the little devil would deliver the final blow.
"I'm spending the day with Diamond," Nano replied with a hint of smugness. "We're going to the spa we passed on the way here."
Jun's spoon froze halfway to his mouth when he realized what this meant. Everyone had split up, leaving him and Dylan to fend for themselves. He shot Nano a look that clearly said, "I know what you're doing," which Nano answered with an innocent smile.
"What about you two?" Gam asked, glancing between Jun and Dylan.
Jun turned to Dylan, who was leaning against the counter, a coffee cup in his hands. "I, uh, don't have any plans," Jun said carefully.
Dylan, who had been quietly sipping his coffee, looked up. "I was actually going to work on some lyrics today."
"Perfect!" Nano exclaimed, patting Jun on the back as he walked by. "Jun will help you."
"What?" Dylan's surprised voice mingled with Jun's own protest.
"I'm not sure..." Jun started, but Nano was already herding the others out of the kitchen.
"You're both welcome!" Nano called over his shoulder, giving Jun a wink that only he could see before disappearing into the hallway.
And then they were alone. Again.
Dylan stared into his coffee cup as if it held answers to questions he hadn't asked. Jun fidgeted with his spoon, suddenly finding his cereal fascinating.
"You don't have to help me," Dylan finally said, breaking the silence. "I know Nano was just... Nano."
Jun looked up and studied Dylan's face. There was tension around his eyes, but also something else, something that looked a lot like vulnerability. He looked as tired as Jun felt and probably looked as well. Jun wanted to break down his walls, one by one, even if it took his whole life to finally reach that precious heart and brain.
"I'd like to," Jun said before he could question himself. "But let's do something fun first."
Dylan eyed him suspiciously. "Define 'fun.'"
"Nothing crazy," Jun reassured. "We're at a beach house in one of the most beautiful places in the country, you don't really want to spend the day indoors writing lyrics, do you?"
Dylan seemed to consider this, his fingers tapping on his cup. "I suppose I could use the inspiration before I dive in."
"That's the spirit!" Jun grinned, feeling a small victory. "How about we take our coffee up on deck? The view is amazing in the morning."
Just like that, their day got off to the best of starts. They talked and talked and talked about random things, their lives, their accomplishments, and Jun was just happy to listen to Dylan. It was so rare that Dylan talked so much that Jun basked in his voice, soaking up every single word and committing them to memory.
It was the little things that Jun vowed never to forget, like the way Dylan sometimes chuckled, making fun of himself in a way Jun had never thought he was capable of. Or the way his voice softened and his eyes lit up when he talked about music.
Jun reciprocated, answering every question with honesty, giving insights into his childhood and his oldest friends, and how he sometimes worried that living in the spotlight would mean losing them.
In return, Dylan opened up about some of the things he had to endure growing up. He mentioned his nightmare from the night before, what caused it, and the differences between the dream and what actually happened. Jun offered support without any of his usual teasing or sarcastic remarks.
The whole morning felt like the most honest conversation they had ever had. Their conversation flowed so naturally that they lost track of time, the sun climbing higher in the sky as they remained on the deck, empty coffee cups long forgotten.
At least until Jun's stomach rumbled loudly, reminding them that it was time for lunch. Dylan's laugh was mesmerizing, completely transforming his usually grumpy face, the pout nowhere to be seen. Jun's heart soared at the thought of eliciting such a reaction from him, butterflies dancing in his stomach as he couldn't help but stare.
They had a quick lunch and took the opportunity to change into shorts and light shirts before heading back to the beach. They walked barefoot along the shore, the gentle waves occasionally lapping at their ankles as they continued to talk about lighter subjects.
"So that's why you're so meticulous about the lyrics," Jun said, kicking at the wet sand. "I always thought you were just being difficult when you rejected my verses."
Dylan laughed, a sound Jun was quickly becoming addicted to. "I didn't reject them to spite you. Well, maybe a little at first," he admitted with an embarrassed grin. "But mostly because I knew you could do better."
Jun paused and looked at Dylan in awe as the realization dawned on him. "Thanks for pushing me to be a better lyricist."
And then, just because the mood felt right and he knew neither of them had taken their phones, he pushed Dylan further into the sea, trying to make him fall.
Dylan yelped and stumbled backwards into deeper water, his hands flying out to grab Jun for balance. Jun tried to dodge, but Dylan's fingers caught his shirt, and with a triumphant grin, Dylan pulled him down into the water beside him.
They both went under with a splash, the cool water shocking against their sun-warmed skin. Jun came up spluttering, pushing his wet hair out of his eyes to find Dylan already standing, water running down his face as he laughed.
"You should see your face right now," Dylan said, his eyes crinkled at the corners.
Jun lunged at him again, and they wrestled in the shallows like children, splashing and laughing, not caring about their soaked clothes or the salt water in their eyes. When they finally called a truce, they were both breathless and grinning, standing waist-deep in the clear blue water.
"I think I won this round," Dylan said, his smile wide and unguarded, drops of seawater clinging to his eyelashes.
Jun's breath caught in his throat. As the sun set behind Dylan, casting a golden halo around his silhouette, he looked ethereal. Jun had seen Dylan in countless photo shoots, in perfect lighting, styled by professionals, but nothing compared to this moment, with his hair plastered to his forehead and salt water dripping down his face.
"Only because I let you," Jun countered, trying to regain his composure. "I could take you down again if I wanted to."
Dylan raised an eyebrow. "Is that a challenge?"
"Maybe," Jun said, backing off a bit. "But I think we should probably go back and change. I'll start pruning." He held up his wrinkled fingertips as proof.
To be honest, Jun was afraid. Afraid of saying the wrong thing and pushing Dylan away. But most of all, he was afraid of the clucking between them, the soft fire, the humming electricity that drew Jun closer than he should. They were entering dangerous territory, and he didn't want to make Dylan uncomfortable, so it was better to be safe than sorry.
The walk back was quieter, both of them lost in thought. Jun would give anything to get a glimpse into Dylan's brain, wondering what he was thinking today, about their conversations and the moments they had shared. They parted ways in the bedroom and Jun went out to find another room to change into, putting on a new shirt and loose pants that he felt comfortable in.
He lounged on the sofa in the patio, waiting for Dylan to join him with his notebook, as they had agreed to work on the song next. He had grabbed Thame's guitar on the way over and was now strumming the strings. He was only trying, but it would be enough to start working on the lyrics and the beat.
"Do you play?" Dylan asked in surprise as he sat down, much closer than Jun had expected, their knees pressed together.
"A little. Thame's been trying to teach me, but I'm not the best student."
"On brand," Dylan scoffed, and Jun nudged his shoulder playfully.
"Did you know you even rap in your sleep?" Jun asked to distract from his laziness.
"That's kind of a cool superpower, except I don't remember anything in the morning."
'I'd write it all down for you,' Jun thought, but kept quiet.
"Maybe we should record you while you sleep," Jun suggested instead, his tone light. "Could be our next hit single."
Dylan snorted and opened his notebook. "Pretty sure sleep-rapping won't top the charts."
"You never know. The fans will eat up anything you do." Jun leaned closer and tried to look at Dylan's notebook. "So what are we working on?"
Dylan hesitated, then tilted the notebook so Jun could see. Pages filled with scribbled lyrics, crossed-out lines, and doodles in the margins. "It's for the new album. I've been stuck on the bridge for weeks."
Jun scanned the lyrics, his eyebrows raised. This wasn't Dylan's usual style, the words were raw, vulnerable, almost confessional. "This is... different."
"Too different?" Dylan asked, a hint of uncertainty in his voice. He looked at Jun with an expression that made Jun's heart stutter.
"No, not too different. Just... real." Jun read the text again, letting the words sink in. "It's beautiful, Dylan."
Dylan's shoulders relaxed slightly. "Thank you. I wasn't sure if it was too personal."
"The best songs always are," Jun said quietly. He pointed to a verse near the middle. "This part here, it's like you're speaking directly to someone's soul."
Dylan's ears colored slightly. "Yeah, that's... that's the idea."
"Do you have a beat in mind?" He asked, trying out some chords, humming the part of the lyrics he had already memorized.
Dylan gave him a chord progression he had in mind, tapping the beat with his foot, and started rapping when he got Jun to do what he had in mind.
I see the cracks in my reflection,
Every flaw I try to hide.
A little too lost in imperfection,
Scared you'll see what's locked inside.
But if I let my walls come down,
Will you catch me before I drown?
When Dylan started to sing the chorus, Jun almost messed up the chords, too surprised to say a word.
Will you love me when I break?
When my heart’s too much to take?
When the shadows whisper louder than my name?
Will you stay through every doubt?
When I push and shut you out?
Tell me you won’t turn away
Love me anyway.
Jun held his breath for the 2nd verse and let Dylan's voice envelop him like a cocoon.
I’ve got scars that tell a story,
Some are deep and some still bleed.
But if I let you walk in slowly,
Will you still choose to believe?
That I’m more than all my damage,
More than fear and foolish habits?
Of course, Jun already knew the words, so he joined Dylan for the second chorus, their voices blending together, matching perfectly. They rarely sang together during songs, and now Jun couldn't even understand why.
Will you love me when I break?
When my heart’s too much to take?
When the shadows whisper louder than my name?
Will you stay through every doubt?
When I push and shut you out?
Tell me you won’t turn away
Love me anyway.
"This is as far as I got." Dylan said and looked up from his notebook at Jun, who was completely mesmerized.
For a moment Jun couldn't speak. The lyrics had burrowed somewhere deep inside him, touching a place he rarely admitted even to himself.
"That's... wow," he finally managed. "Who hurt you enough to write this?"
Dylan looked away, his profile sharp against the fading daylight. "It's not about being hurt. Not exactly."
"Then what?" Jun pressed gently.
"It's about...fear." Dylan's voice dropped lower. "Fear of letting someone see all of you. The real you. Not the version you show to the world."
Jun hummed thoughtfully and strummed a few experimental chords. "What if we slow it down here? Make it more intimate before building up to the final chorus."
He played a softer progression, then looked up at Dylan. "Something like this:
I don’t need perfect, just someone who tries,
Someone who sees me through honest eyes.
If I shatter, will you still stay near?
Hold me close and quiet the fear?"
Jun screamed inwardly, Dylan's eyes fixed on his face and the way he looked made him want to scream 'please give me a chance'. They sang the chorus together again, Jun letting the words wash over him, feeling as if they were his own.
"This - this could work," Dylan stuttered, grabbing his notebook and quickly scribbling down the words.
When Jun noticed that his hand was shaking, he didn't comment.
"Let's start from the beginning," Jun suggested, needing the distraction to keep from going crazy and saying something stupid.
They went through the whole song, Jun barely looking at his fingers, concentrating instead on Dylan and the way he seemed to be completely immersed in the song, pouring out his feelings. He looked beautiful with his eyes closed and his head bobbing to the beat.
Dylan surprised him by adding after the last chorus:
So if I fall, if I break,
Promise me you'll choose to stay.
Love me anyway...
When Dylan opened his eyes and found him staring at him, Jun didn't look away. The silence around them was heavy, thick with tension that Jun didn't know how to break without destroying what they had built today.
Dylan's habitual pout was back in place, and Jun's eyes dropped to the perfect lips that were swallowing hard and probably noticeably.
"Please don't pout," Jun whispered softly, fingers reaching up before his hand stopped halfway.
"Why?" A word. A very simple yet complicated word.
Jun hesitated, trying to weigh the best course of action before deciding on honesty. "Because it badly makes me want to kiss you."
The breathless words hung in the air while Dylan looked from one eye to the other, seemingly trying to find answers Jun probably didn't have.
"Permission granted." Dylan finally said after what seemed like hours.
Jun's brain short-circuited. He understood the words, but couldn't grasp their meaning.
"What?" He asked dumbly, his heart in his throat, feeling like he was about to pass out from lack of breath.
"I'm giving you my consent to kiss me." Dylan explained quietly, his eyes suddenly deeper than Jun had ever seen them before.
The guitar slipped from Jun's hands and landed with a soft thud on the upholstered deck chair. His heart pounded so hard he was sure Dylan could hear it.
The words were loud in his ears, deafening, impossible to take back or ignore.
"You... give me permission to kiss you," Jun repeated slowly, as if saying it out loud would reveal that he had misheard, but Dylan didn't take the words back, didn't try to laugh it off or pretend that he didn't mean it. Instead, he waited, his eyes fixed on Jun's.
Jun shifted closer on the seat, their knees now pressed tightly together. Up close, Jun could see the slight tremor in Dylan's lower lip, the way his pupils had dilated, dark and deep against the warm brown of his irises. Despite his bold words, Dylan looked as frightened as Jun felt.
Jun raised his hand, his fingers trembling as they finally made contact with Dylan's cheek. The touch was light as a feather, barely there, but it still sent electricity through him. Dylan's breath caught, a small sound that Jun felt more than heard in the tiny space between them.
Jun leaned forward, pausing when their noses brushed. He could feel Dylan's breath against his lips, warm and uncertain. The moment stretched between them, fragile and electric, until Dylan made a small, impatient sound and leaned in.
Their lips met softly at first, hesitant and questioning. Jun's eyes fluttered closed and he felt Dylan's hand grab his shirt, pulling him closer. The kiss deepened naturally, as if they'd been doing this forever instead of for the first time. Jun tasted mint and something sweeter - maybe the cherry soda Dylan had drunk earlier - and he couldn't help the small sound that escaped from the back of his throat.
Jun found himself chasing that taste, pulling closer. Dylan's hands found Jun's shoulders, gripping the fabric of his shirt like an anchor. The kiss deepened, growing bolder with each passing second, and Jun felt something inside him unravel.
When they finally broke apart, both breathing heavily, Jun kept his eyes closed for a moment, afraid of what he might see when he opened them. Reality had a way of shattering perfect moments.
But instead he felt Dylan's forehead pressed against his own, his breath warm against his lips as he whispered, "Why did it take you so long to see me?"
Jun opened his eyes wide and pulled his head away from Dylan's to look at him. His heart was still beating loudly, confusion taking over as the words found their way to the deepest part of his brain, the one that knew Dylan was looking at him with something special in his eyes.
"I'm sorry, babe. I see you now." He apologized softly, his thumb tracing the outline of Dylan's lips before pulling him into another kiss.
Dylan moved in a flash, pushing Jun against the couch and straddling his lap. Jun's hands instinctively found Dylan's waist, steadying him as the weight rested perfectly against his thighs. The sudden closeness was overwhelming, Dylan's warmth seeping through the thin fabric of their clothes.
With no time to waste, Dylan's hands began to undo the few buttons on his shirt while Jun's slid under his top, grabbing his hips and pulling him down to meet his awakening desire.
Dylan gasped against Jun's mouth, the friction sending sparks through both of them. His fingers fumbled with the last button, finally pushing open Jun's shirt to reveal smooth skin beneath. Jun's hands tightened on Dylan's hips, guiding a slow, deliberate rhythm that left them both breathless.
"You're sinful," Dylan commented, his fingers tracing idle patterns on Jun's chest, whose muscles tensed in response to every touch.
"You haven't seen sinful yet," Jun murmured against Dylan's throat, trailing kisses across the sensitive skin, feeling Dylan's pulse race beneath his lips.
A sharp intake of breath was his reward as Dylan tilted his head back, giving Jun better access. Jun took full advantage, nipping gently at the point where the neck met the shoulder, then soothing the spot with his tongue. Dylan's fingers tangled in Jun's hair, pulling just hard enough to send shivers down Jun's spine.
Dylan's fingers continued their exploration, tracing the lines of Jun's chest with reverent attention. Each touch felt like fire against Jun's skin, burning away any doubts that might have lingered between them.
"I've been dreaming about this for so long I can't even remember the first time," Dylan whispered with an expert roll of his hips, turning Jun into a panting, speechless mess.
The way Dylan moved against him, the way he sounded was all consuming and Jun didn't think he would ever be able to stop. So he did the only thing that seemed appropriate and grabbed Dylan's legs, wrapping them around his hips as he stood up. Dylan's yelp at being carried was muffled by Jun's lips as he kissed him again, stopping only for a few seconds to look where he was going before diving back in.
Thame's guitar and Dylan's notebook were long forgotten by the time Jun reached their bedroom, closing the door with his foot before gently dropping Dylan onto the bed.
Dylan bounced slightly on the mattress, his eyes never leaving Jun's as he propped himself up on his elbows. His shirt had risen, exposing a strip of pale skin above the waistband. Jun stood frozen at the foot of the bed, suddenly overwhelmed by the reality of what was happening.
"Are you having second thoughts?" Dylan asked, vulnerability creeping into his voice despite his attempt to keep it steady.
Jun shook his head, letting his open shirt slide from his shoulders to the floor. "No doubts. Just... making sure I'm not dreaming."
A slow smile spread across Dylan's face, the kind that made his eyes crinkle at the corners. "If this is a dream, I don't want to wake up." He held out a hand. "Come here."
Jun crawled onto the bed and hovered over Dylan, his heart pounding against his chest at the sight. Dylan's lips were swollen from their kisses, hair disheveled where Jun's fingers had run through it.
Lowering himself carefully until their bodies were aligned, supporting his weight on his forearms, Jun murmured, "I think I've been blind," before planting a soft kiss on the corner of Dylan's mouth. "And that I don't want to waste another second."
Dylan's hands slid up Jun's bare back, tracing the contours of his shoulder blades, pulling him closer. "Then don't," he whispered against Jun's lips.
The world shrank to this moment, this room, this bed. Jun lost himself in the sensation of Dylan's fingertips mapping his skin, memorizing every dip and curve as if they were committing it to memory. When Dylan arched beneath him, their bodies pressed together from chest to hip, Jun couldn't hold back the groan that escaped him.
Jun's fingers slid under Dylan's shirt, tracing the warm skin of his stomach, feeling the muscles there tense at his touch.
"Off," Dylan muttered, tugging impatiently at his own shirt. Jun helped him pull it over his head, then paused to take in the sight before him. Dylan's chest rose and fell with quick breaths, a flush spreading across his skin.
"You're staring," Dylan said, a hint of self-consciousness in his voice.
Jun ran a finger along Dylan's collarbone. "Can you blame me? You're beautiful."
Dylan's blush deepened, spreading across his chest. His eyes, dark and eager, held Jun's gaze with newfound confidence. "Show me how beautiful you think I am," he challenged softly.
Jun did not need any further invitation. He lowered his head, pressed his lips to Dylan's collarbone, then traced a path down with his mouth. Each kiss was deliberate, worshipful, drawing small sounds from Dylan that Jun wanted to capture and keep forever. As his lips brushed Dylan's nipple, Dylan's back arched slightly off the bed, his fingers digging into Jun's shoulders.
Jun took his time, learning the geography of Dylan's body with his lips and hands. Every breath, every shiver was a revelation. His mouth moved lower, tracing the subtle definition of Dylan's abdomen, feeling the muscles jump under his touch. He paused at the waistband of Dylan's jeans and looked up to find Dylan watching him with half-closed eyes, his lips parted in sin.
"Is this okay?" Jun whispered, his fingers hovering over the button.
Dylan nodded, then seemed to remember himself. "Yes," he breathed. "Please."
Jun's fingers unfastened the button, then the zipper, his movements deliberately slow. He wanted to savor this, to remember every second. Dylan lifted his hips to help as Jun pulled the jeans down his legs and tossed them somewhere beside the bed.
"You're still wearing too much," Dylan complained quietly, pulling the loose pants down easily.
Jun smiled against Dylan's lips as he kicked his pants off the rest of the way. The feeling of skin against skin was intoxicating, overwhelming in the best possible way. Dylan's hands were everywhere, tracing patterns down his back, sliding down to grab his hips, pulling him impossibly closer.
"I can't believe this is happening," Jun murmured, tracing the curve of Dylan's jaw with his lips.
Dylan's laugh was breathless. "If you'd been paying attention, this could have happened years ago."
Jun drew back slightly and met Dylan's eyes. "How long have you...?"
"Forever," Dylan said simply. "Pretty much since we first met and I was so angry at you for making me feel this way."
Jun's heart tightened. He had never meant for Dylan to fall in love with him. He was young, arrogant and careless. But now that he cared, he couldn't quite understand how he had missed the signs all these years, like the fact that he loved to annoy Dylan the most.
"Now is not the time to be sorry," Dylan whispered, his fingertips tracing the line of Jun's jaw. "Now is the time for this."
He pulled Jun down for another kiss, this one deeper, more urgent than before. Jun let himself be consumed by it, by the heat of Dylan's body beneath his, by the years of wanting that had somehow been there all along, unnamed and unacknowledged.
Dylan's hand slid between them, fingers wrapping around Jun with a confidence that made him gasp against his mouth. Jun's hips bucked involuntarily and Dylan smiled against his lips, obviously pleased with the reaction.
"Who would have thought," Dylan murmured, his voice low and teasing as his hand continued its torturous movements, "that I could reduce the great Jun of MARS to this."
Jun's laugh turned into a groan as Dylan's thumb circled just right. Jun couldn't think straight as Dylan's hand worked its magic, pleasure wrapping itself around the base of his spine. He buried his face in the crook of Dylan's neck, breathing in his scent, a mix of cedar cologne and something unique to Dylan.
"Two can play at this game," Jun whispered, his voice rough with desire as his own hand slid down Dylan's body, mirroring his movements. The sound Dylan made - half gasp, half moan - was like music, more beautiful than any song they could ever write together.
Jun matched Dylan's rhythm, beat for beat, watching in fascination as Dylan's composure unraveled beneath him. The songwriter who always had the perfect words was reduced to breathless moans and half-formed pleas. It was intoxicating to watch.
"Jun," Dylan gasped, his free hand gripping Jun's shoulder so tightly it might leave marks. "I need-I want-"
"Tell me," Jun urged, slowing his movements to a maddening pace. "What do you want, Dylan?"
Squirming, his hips thrusting into Jun's hand, Dylan was a panting mess, unable to form coherent words until Jun slowed down enough for his thoughts to return.
"Lube and condom in my backpack," Dylan managed, gesturing haphazardly to the far right of the room.
"Foresighted," Jun chuckled, planting a quick kiss on Dylan's wet and shiny lips before leaving his side and returning as quickly as he could.
He settled back between Dylan's thighs, the small bottle and foil packet placed within reach on the sheets.
"You're full of surprises," Jun murmured, leaning down to capture Dylan's lips once more.
Dylan arched into the kiss, his hands sliding down Jun's back until they reached his ass, grabbing a handful to pull him closer. "You have no idea," he whispered against Jun's mouth.
They lost themselves in each other, the room filling with gasps and moans as Jun slowly worked him open, driving Dylan mad with pleasure and ruining himself for everyone else.
"You're killing me," Dylan gasped, his head thrown back against the pillow as Jun's fingers curled inside him with deliberate precision. His body arched off the bed, seeking more of the exquisite sensation.
"Jun, please," Dylan whispered, his voice breaking at the last word. His eyes, when they met Jun's, were dark with need. "I'm ready. I need you."
Jun withdrew his fingers slowly, eliciting a soft whimper from Dylan. With trembling hands, he reached for the condom, fumbling with the wrapper until Dylan gently took it from him.
"Let me," Dylan said, tearing it open with surprisingly steady fingers.
His touch as he rolled the condom onto Jun was almost Jun's undoing, gentle yet purposeful and so intimate that it brought Jun closer to heaven. Jun had to close his eyes and breathe deeply to keep control.
When Jun opened his eyes again, the sight of Dylan beneath him, flushed, wanting, beautiful, almost took his breath away. Positioning himself carefully, Jun slowly pushed forward, watching Dylan's face for any sign of discomfort. Dylan's breath caught, his fingers digging into Jun's shoulders as he adjusted to the sensation.
Holding himself perfectly still despite every instinct urging him to move, Jun waited until Dylan moved his hips slightly in encouragement. "Don't stop."
Jun began to move, setting a rhythm that was painfully slow at first, savoring every sensation, every little sound that escaped Dylan's lips. Dylan's legs wrapped around Jun's waist, pulling him deeper, pushing him closer.
Words failed him as Dylan moved to meet his every thrust, pushing on his shoulder to reverse their position when the pace wasn't satisfactory. Jun watched in awe as Dylan took control, rising above him like an ethereal vision, his skin flushed and glistening with sweat. The change in position allowed Dylan to set the pace, his thighs tensing as he moved with purpose, each roll of his hips drawing strangled sounds from Jun's throat.
"You like this view better?" Dylan asked, his voice rough and breathless, a knowing smile playing at the corners of his mouth.
Jun couldn't form coherent words, could only nod as his hands found Dylan's hips, fingers pressing into the soft skin there. Dylan was great like that - confident, powerful, taking what he wanted. It was a side of him Jun had only glimpsed before. Something that would now be burned into his brain forever, never to be forgotten.
Dylan leaned forward, changing the angle slightly, taking Jun deeper, hitting all the right spots as their breaths mingled again.
Jun gasped, his fingers digging deeper into Dylan's hips. The sight of Dylan above him, eyes half-closed with pleasure, was almost too much to bear. Every roll of Dylan's hips sent waves of sensation through Jun's body, building to release.
Dylan braced his hands against Jun's chest, using the leverage to find a rhythm that had them both panting. Jun slid a hand up Dylan's side, tracing the curve of his ribs, his shoulder, finally tangling in the hair at the nape of his neck to pull him down for a desperate kiss.
The change in angle made Dylan moan against Jun's mouth, the sound vibrating between them. Jun could feel himself getting closer, the pressure building at the base of his spine. He wrapped his free hand around Dylan, stroking in time with their movements.
"Jun-" Dylan's voice broke at his name, a desperate, needy sound that would soon have Jun on his knees. "I'm close, I'm-"
Jun tightened his grip, his rhythm growing more erratic as his own release approached. "Let go," he whispered against Dylan's lips. "I've got you."
Dylan's entire body tensed, his back arching beautifully as he came, Jun's name on his lips, hot spilling between them. The sight of Dylan lost in pleasure, combined with the feeling of him tightening around Jun, was enough to push Jun over the edge. His release hit him like a tidal wave, pleasure coursing through every nerve ending as he held Dylan close, not caring that semen smeared between their bodies as Dylan fell onto his chest.
They stayed like that for several heartbeats, trembling against each other, their breath mingling in the small space between them. Jun cupped Dylan's face in his hands, planting soft kisses on his lips and face as he pulled away, soothing the grimace that stretched Dylan's features.
He'd like nothing more than to stay there, but he knew better than to let the cum dry, and he needed to get rid of the condom before it stuck to his skin. So he pulled away gently, making sure to keep his hands and eyes on Dylan.
Softly, softer than ever, he said, "Come on, babe. I'll clean you up."
Jun couldn't believe it himself, he'd never been one to do so much aftercare, but with Dylan? He wanted it all, wanted to be the one to make him feel good and taken care of.
Dylan snuggled his head into the crook of Jun's neck and seemed to inhale his scent, making him shiver. When Jun made a move, Dylan held on even tighter, protesting weakly without words. Jun was so in ove that he felt like his heart would jump out of his body and lie at Dylan's feet.
"Just a minute more," Dylan murmured against Jun's skin, his body a warm, comfortable weight. "I've wanted this for so long. I'm not ready to let go."
Jun's heart swelled at the admission. He traced lazy patterns on Dylan's back, feeling the slight bumps of his spine under the smooth skin. "We have all night," he promised quietly. "And tomorrow. And the day after that."
Dylan lifted his head slightly, just enough to meet Jun's eyes. There was something vulnerable in his gaze, a question he seemed afraid to ask. "Do we?"
Jun understood the uncertainty. This wasn't just sex, it was years of tension finally breaking, years of feelings neither of them had acknowledged until now. It changed everything.
"Yes," Jun said firmly, brushing a strand of hair from Dylan's forehead. "If you want to."
Dylan said nothing, opting for a simple nod and that damned shy smile that melted Jun to the core. As they rolled over, Dylan squirmed under the onslaught of kisses, his giggles filling the room.
When Jun finally gave in, Dylan was breathless, his eyes bright with what looked suspiciously like happiness. Jun hopefully wore the same expression, because he certainly felt like it.
"We really should clean up," he said with a disgusted nod at their bodies.
He planted a last kiss on Dylan's temple and slid off the bed. Jun padded to the bathroom, discarding the condom and wetting a washcloth with warm water. When he returned, he paused on the threshold, leaned against the doorframe, and took in the sight of Dylan, propped up on his elbows, looking delicious with his disheveled hair and squinty eyes.
"Shower with me?" Jun suggested, holding out his hand in invitation.
"I don't think my legs are working yet," Dylan finally said with a shy smile.
Jun couldn't help the satisfied grin that spread across his face. He walked back to the bed, still holding the warm washcloth in his hand.
Dylan smiled lazily and reached for Jun's outstretched hand. Jun pulled him up with a gentle tug, steadying Dylan when he flinched slightly. "Just cleaning, I promise." He led Dylan to the bathroom and turned on the shower, testing the water temperature with his wrist before leading them both under the warm spray.
The steam rose around them, creating a cocoon of warmth and intimacy. Jun squeezed some shampoo into his palm and worked it gently into Dylan's hair, massaging his scalp with careful fingers. Dylan's eyes fluttered shut.
"Brings back memories," Jun commented with a smile as Dylan hummed in appreciation.
"The day you dyed my hair," Dylan began, looking up at Jun, "I didn't know if I wanted to kill you for being so damn handsome and annoying or get down on my knees."
Dylan's fingers traced idle patterns along Jun's forearm, leaving goosebumps in their wake despite the warmth surrounding them.
"I wouldn't have stopped you," Jun admitted, because that day had changed things for him.
"Oh, I know," Dylan scoffed, "but I wouldn't have trusted you not to break my heart."
Jun's hands stopped in Dylan's hair. He probably would have freaked out and left Dylan right after it happened.
"And now?" Jun asked, his voice barely audible over the splashing water.
Dylan turned over completely in Jun's arms, water running down his face, making his eyelashes curl. He looked painfully beautiful like that, vulnerable and open in a way Jun had never seen before.
"Now I'm terrified," Dylan admitted, "but I'm more scared of never knowing what this could be."
Jun felt something crack inside his chest. Dylan had built walls around himself for so long, cultivating a reputation for being casual, unattached, but deep down he craved attention, Jun's attention, and Jun was finally ready to give it all to him.
Jun leaned forward and pressed his forehead against Dylan's. "I can't promise I won't screw up," he whispered. "But I can promise that I'll try. Every day."
Dylan's lips curved into that soft smile again, the one that made Jun's chest ache with something he was only now beginning to recognize as belonging. Like home.
"That's all I'm asking," Dylan murmured, his fingers tracing the line of Jun's jaw. "Just try. With me."
They finished the shower in comfortable silence, hands lingering as they washed each other, learning curves and dips they'd only just begun to explore. Jun wrapped Dylan in a towel and rubbed his hair dry with a tenderness that surprised even himself.
Back in the bedroom, Jun changed the sheets while Dylan rummaged through his luggage, pulling out a worn T-shirt that Jun recognized as his own, lost months ago.
"So that's where it went," Jun said, raising an eyebrow.
Dylan clutched the shirt to his chest, a blush spreading to the top of his ears. "I may have been stealing your clothes for a while."
With a smile, Jun helped him put the shirt on before stepping behind Dylan and wrapping his arms around his waist so that his head fell right on his shoulder.
"Looks better on you," he said with a kiss right behind Dylan's ear, admiring the shiver he felt go through Dylan's body.
"You're the clingy type of boyfriend, huh?" Dylan asked smugly.
"I'm your clingy boyfriend." Jun teased back, giving Dylan a loud kiss on the cheek before running out the door yelling, "I'm starving."
They took full advantage of the empty house and the giddiness that came with a new relationship, stealing kisses and making out. It was the freest and lightest they had felt in a very, very long time, and they planned to enjoy the bliss while it lasted.
Neither of them moved when they heard the others come in, too busy cuddling under the covers. Jun ran his hand through Dylan's hair, gently massaging his scalp as he told a childhood story.
Realizing that he was talking to himself when Dylan fell asleep, Jun decided to get a drink. It was late, and unfortunately, despite his relaxed mood, he knew he would have a hard time getting back to sleep. Dylan barely stirred when Jun gently removed his head from his lap. He really was a clingy boyfriend, because he couldn't help but kiss Dylan's cheek and whisper, "I'll be right back."
He heard the front door open as he left the bedroom and found Nano whistling in the kitchen.
"Did you just get home?" Jun asked nicely, wondering what his guardian angel had been up to today.
Nano jumped up and put his hand to his heart, making Jun smile at finally being able to return the favor, since Nano often scared the shit out of him by coming in out of the blue.
"Yup." Nano replied after a while, "It was one of the best days of my life." He said with a megawatt smile that Jun hadn't seen in a long time.
He put his arms around Nano and congratulated him and told him how happy he was to see him so happy. He let Nano rave about Diamond and everything they had done today, happy beyond words not to have the spotlight on him.
As he listened to his friend, he debated whether or not to be honest with him. What made him decide was how helpful Nano had been during this trip. Despite the teasing that Jun would have liked to avoid, Nano had always had his back.
So when Nano was done with his story, and before he could ask any questions, Jun made sure to look directly into his eyes and say a simple "thank you" with a gentle smile.
It didn't take Nano long to understand. The squeal he let out caused Jun to put his hand over his mouth and stifle him.
"Shut up, you'll wake the whole house."
Nano nodded emphatically, his eyes wide with excitement, but Jun didn't trust him enough to remove his hand just yet.
"If I let go, will you be quiet?" Jun whispered, raising an eyebrow.
Nano nodded again, more solemnly this time, and Jun carefully withdrew his hand.
"So you and Dylan finally -" Nano whispered, making an obscene gesture with his hands that made Jun roll his eyes, but he couldn't help the smile that spread across his face, and he nodded slightly.
"About damn time," Nano said, punching Jun lightly on the shoulder.
"Did you really know?" Jun asked curiously, wondering how much Nano knew before Jun even told him that he liked Dylan.
"Know what? That you were meant for each other or that you were a chickenshit idiot?" Nano asked back with a roll of his eyes and threw a water bottle in Jun's face after grabbing one for himself.
"Brat!" Jun muttered under his breath. "About Dylan liking me for real?"
"I had my doubts from the very first day. I think it was love at first sight for him," Nano chuckled, as if the thought was crazy. "But it became painfully obvious after the whole P'Po debacle. The man was insanely jealous that you were flirting right under his nose."
"I wasn't flirting!" Jun protested.
"You could have fooled me." Nano glared at him so hard that Jun blushed.
"So the whole time you were teasing Dylan about us, you knew?"
"He wouldn't admit it, but I knew."
"You're evil," Jun laughed, remembering all the times Nano had made sly comments.
"I'm a mastermind," he replied with a wink before saying goodbye. "Tell him I'm glad he finally got what he wanted and that you, my friend, better take care of him or I'll kick your ass on his behalf."
With those words and a kiss in Jun's face, he tiptoed into his own bedroom, leaving Jun half annoyed and half laughing in the kitchen.
As soon as he slipped into bed, an octopus attacked him, throwing its arms and legs over his body.
"Where did you go?" Dylan mumbled against his skin, obviously still half asleep.
"Just to get some water," he replied lightly, putting his hand back where it belonged and stroking the gray strands of Dylan's hair. "Nano knows," he added as a warning, not knowing what the youngest member would do or say.
"Good." Dylan hummed sleepily. "He deserves to know first."
Before Jun could agree, Dylan was asleep again.
A few hours later, when Dylan began rapping their song in the middle of the night, Jun hummed along, quietly singing the lyrics that would become their anthem.
***
'Love Me Anyway' became the lead single of their second album as an independent group, with Nano cooking up a perfect choreography that put their duo front and center.
Rumors about their relationship status became more rampant, but they never commented. Until one concert, their biggest ever in Thailand.
They had performed the song so many times that the routine was perfected after hours of practice. Dylan's rap to open the song, everyone joining in the chorus, Jun singing the bridge he had written, and the last part of the choreography. The part where he had to put his arms around Dylan and coould sing in his ear that he'd still love him anyway. Jun's microphone was always off at that moment and the words were only for Dylan to hear. Until that night, when everyone in the audience and on the livestream got a taste of it.
If panic had gripped his heart at first, the deafening screams quickly put his fears to rest. Emboldened, he took advantage of the fading lights to kiss Dylan on the cheek before running to his next location with a smile.
The social media frenzy was wild, but to Jun's surprise, most of it was positive. Maybe it was because the band already had two open relationships, or maybe things were finally changing, he didn't know why. But the response was so positive that he asked Dylan for permission to release something that would strongly hint at their relationship.
Jun went through his entire 'JunDylan' album before choosing their first ever photo as a couple. Courtesy of P'Po, the day after they became boyfriends, they were lying on the beach, Dylan's head in Jun's lap. He was playing with Jun's hand while Jun was staring at him with stars in his eyes. But what Jun loved most about the photo was the smile on Dylan's lips. The third smile that had captured his heart forever.
With a kiss, Dylan agreed and hit the "share" button on Jun's Instagram page. A simple post with the photo, a caption that read 'my favorite smile' and 'love me anyway' as the background music.