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“You know how Roier and Cellbit just got married?”
Pac looked up from his takeout, humming in confusion, “Yeah? I mean, we were at their wedding right?” he laughed.
Fit sighed, “That's not what I meant, Roier came into work today bragging about how he got a big bonus now that he has a spouse.”
Pac raised his eyebrows, “Damn, that’s pretty nice, getting married and getting more money out of it?”
Fit laughed, “I know right? Anyway, apparently he gets 10% on his paychecks now that he’s married.”
“Man, that would be nice wouldn’t it,” Fit hummed in agreement and the two fell back into a comfortable quiet as they continued eating and watching reruns of some trashy reality show as they ate take out on Fit’s couch.
Now that Pac was thinking about it, getting married just for the financial benefit wasn’t a terrible idea. He and Fit had known each other for years, since he’d graduated from college and Pac had gotten out of prison. He’d been one of the first people that he and Mike had met after getting out, and they’d grown very close over the years. And Fit was an attractive man, it shouldn’t be too hard to pretend to be married and in love with him.
Pac wasn’t sure if it was the sleep deprivation that came with just finishing a twelve hour shift as a cashier, but the more Pac thought about it, the better the idea sounded.
“We should get married!” Pac blurted out, breaking the relative silence of Fit’s living room.
Fit sputtered, “What!?” almost spitting out the rice in his mouth.
Pac turned to face him, “No, you said that you get a big bonus for having a spouse right? I’m sure you could use the money.” He gestured around him, at the water damaged walls and cracked concrete around them, “Maybe you could move out of this shitty apartment you’ve been in since college.” Fit complained about the apartment he’d been in for nearly four years, the building slowly crumbling, and the landlord reluctant to do any maintenance on the apartment.
“Hey!” Fit frowned, “It's not that bad, may I remind you of that apartment you and Mike were in when I met you? I thought you two were going to die of diseases or something.”
Pac rolled his eyes, “There was only one family of rats in the actual apartment, and we got them all their shots!” He smirked, “And we just got out of prison, so finding a place was kind of hard-”
“Don't use the felon card on me, and please don’t defend the ratinhos right now-”
“Still sad we couldn’t take them with us when we moved out-” Pac cut himself off, “No think about it Fit! It's a win-win situation,”
Fit raised an eyebrow, “Really? What’s in it for you?”
“You getting a higher salary isn’t the only benefit that comes with marriage, Fit. I could really use your health insurance. With Mike leaving to go to school, I can’t use his plan anymore.” It had been something lingering in the back of Pac’s mind, he’d been able to leech off of Mike’s insurance through the university, but as his departure for grad school approached, Pac knew he was going to be left uninsured, and between appointments with his prosthetist and physical therapy, he doubted he’d be able to cover the costs.
Fit frowned, “I didn’t know that health insurance was something that was an issue for you-”
Pac just waved him off, not wanting Fit to worry, “No no, don’t worry about it, I knew I’d figure it out, and this could be a solution. I want a cut of the bonus money too though.” Pac grinned.
Fit was quiet for a few seconds, thinking.
His shoulders relaxed and he turned to Pac, “Okay, I’m down, we split my bonus fifty-fifty, you get in on my health insurance, and we get married.” He smiled.
Pac grinned, extending a hand, “Sounds like a deal fiance.”
Fit smiled back, taking Pac’s hand in his own and giving it a firm shake.
——
The transition from single to married wasn’t a hard one to make. Nearly nothing changed, sure Pac got Fit’s health insurance, and the extra money each month made it easier to keep up with the rent on his apartment after Mike moved out, but nothing in their relationship changed. They still had their own apartments, they still went to the gym together and ate takeout Thai food every Friday night.
Fit was still one of Pac’s best friends, and Pac didn’t consider a romantic potential in their relationship any more than he did before they got married, which was nearly never. No, Fit and Pac remained firmly platonic for the majority of their first year of marriage.
Fit had convinced Pac to use his new health insurance to see a prosthetist for the first time since he’d gotten out of prison, and his bonus had covered the leftover costs for a new leg that the insurance hadn’t. Overall, Pac’s life was pretty good, he’d finally found a job at a company he could bear to work at, who’d had no problems with hiring a felon as a lab aide.
It happened to be that job that caused the turning point in Pac and Fit’s relationship.
——
Pac was getting ready to go home, putting up the broom and filling out the cleaning checklist when his boss called him into his office.
His boss was an older man, who had started working at the biotechnology company as an intern in college, and had helped shape the groundbreaking research they were doing in prosthetics and medical wearables in the past two decades. He was kind, and cared deeply about their mission and the people on the staff.
Pac smiled as he took a seat across from him.
His boss smiled back, “Pac! Good to see you, how have you been?”
Pac shrugged, “Ah, you know, nothing new, just work and home, and doctors appointments,”
“I see, I see,” He nodded, shifting in his chair to face Pac better, “Well, I wanted to talk to you about a program this company has that I think you’d be a good fit for, and see if it’s something you’re interested in.” Pac nodded, and his boss continued, “We have a program called Career Advance, where the company would fully pay for you to go to school, get a degree, and you would agree to come back and work here for a minimum of four years after you graduate. While you’re in school, you could work part time here as well. Now, usually this program is used my our scientists or engineers to go to grad school, but Pac, I’ve seen the notes you’ve left on the files, heard you talking with our engineers, you are a very intelligent man, and given the opportunity, I think you would become a valuable member of our engineering team. I want you to have this opportunity because I see the potential in you.”
Pac was speechless. The idea of going to university, getting a degree in engineering no less, and then getting to come back and work for an amazing company who was advancing prosthetics technology every day was unbelievable, “I- I- don’t even know what to say sir,”
His boss nodded, “I understand, this is a big decision to make, take your time, it’s only May, and the earliest you could start classes is for the fall semester, so you have time to think this over. Go home, talk with your husband, and if you’re ready, we can talk more about it on Monday,”
“Thank you so much, sir, this really is unbelievable, I never thought I’d be able to get a degree, or work doing something so amazing,”
“Of course, Pac, I think everyone deserves the opportunity to do what they love,” He pushed himself up to stand, “Now, don’t let me keep you too long, enjoy your weekend Pac,”
Pac nodded, standing as well, “Thank you, you too sir,”
He made his way out of his boss’ office and back to gather his things.
Pac barely registered the walk to the bus stop, mind too focused on the possibility of going to university to be fully present. When he and Mike had gone to prison, they had been twenty and eighteen respectively, they’d been incarcerated for five years before their release, and when they got out, Pac flew back into that protective provider role over Mike that he’d filled since the two had met when they were nine and eleven in the orphanage, getting the first job he could find, a night custodian at an office building, then a second job for the day, bagging groceries at a supermarket, so Mike could start taking classes at community college.
And he had no regrets about it, if Pac could do it all again, he’d sacrifice his whole life for Mike to follow his dreams. But now that his brother was at university, he didn’t have to sacrifice himself for someone else. For the first time since before he was a teenager, he didn’t have someone else he had to watch out for. As much as Mike loathed to admit it, that’s what it had been. Pac had to work two full time jobs to keep a roof over him and Mike’s head, to help with his tuition, and books, and make sure the electricity stayed on so Mike could study when it got dark. When he’d gotten the job at the labs, it had calmed down a little bit, it was higher paying, better hours, and easier for Mike to make sure he looked after himself too, but he’d still been in that mindset.
He supposed, in a way he still was. Sure, Mike was a thousand miles away, and supporting himself entirely, but it had never switched over for Pac.
He’d never thought that maybe now, it was his turn to follow his dreams.
But still, Pac could barely afford rent on his apartment. If he switched to a part time position, he would be forced to budget even more, he’d be forced to go back to cheap shitty food, back down to two meals a day like just after he and Mike were released.
He trudged into the Thai restaurant, ordering his and Fit’s takeout orders on autopilot.
He supposed he could talk to Fit about it. It always felt better to talk out the big complicated feelings.
——
Pac wasn’t quite sure when his and Fit’s relationship changed, but he knew it was sometime just before he started school. They started cuddling closer on the couch on their movie nights, their hugs lingered longer, holding each other a little tighter. Pac started getting a weird fluttering in his gut when he and Fit were close to each other.
It was the Friday of Pac’s first week of classes. So far, he’d been enjoying his classes, jumping right into Calculus, and Chemistry, and Biology, and Computer Aided Design, and though he’d been busy, he was excited to keep learning. Fit had showed up to his apartment just after he’d gotten home, a bottle of champagne in hand and a wide grin on his face.
“Fit! Hi! What is the occasion?” he ushered Fit in the door, gesturing at the bottle of champagne.
Fit stepped in, still beaming as he threw an arm around Pac, “Its to celebrate your first week of school, of course,” he squeezed Pac tight before pulling back, “I was going to take you out somewhere tonight, but I figured you would be tired and we could still celebrate at our regular movie nights,” he paused, lifting a hand to scratch at the back of his head, “Or, if you are too tired, its fine, we can drink it another time,”
Pac’s eyes widened, shaking his head, “No, no, I definitely am not objecting,” he grinned back, “I rented Jurassic Park for us,” Pac said as he led Fit over to the couch, where the pizza he ordered was sitting.
——
By the end of the movie, Pac and Fit were both comfortably tipsy, leaning into each other on the couch, talking about everything and nothing.
Pac leaned closer, head resting against Fit’s shoulder, giggling, “Thank you Fit, you’re too good to me,”
Fit’s arms came up around Pac’s shoulders, “Nah, you deserve a celebration Pac, you’ve been working really hard for this,”
Pac sat up, pushing back so he could look Fit in the eyes, “No, no, not just for the champagne, for everything, for being with me, for encouraging me, I wouldn’t be in school right now without you. Hell, I’d still be using that leg that didn’t really fit anymore if it wasn’t for you.” His hand came up to cradle Fit’s cheek, “Thank you, Fit,”
Fit’s cheeks warmed under Pac’s hand, face a light shade of pink, though if that was from Pac’s movement, or the alcohol, Pac wasn’t sure.
Fit sighed, smiling, and leaned a bit into Pac’s hand, holding out the champagne bottle. They had long since given up on using glasses, their cups sitting on the coffee table next to the couch, abandoned, “There isn’t much left, you should do the honors,”
Pac nodded, letting go of Fit to take the bottle, tilting it up to drink the last mouthful of champagne, then setting it on the coffee table, turning back to Fit.
He pulled the other man back into his arms, giggling softly when Fit squeaked in surprise, cheeks still dusted with pink.
Pac leaned back, tugging on Fit so that the other was laying on his chest. Fit brought his right arm up around Pac’s waist, both of their prosthetics long since abandoned to the floor near the coffee table.
“I’m scared,” Fit’s chest rumbled against Pac’s as he spoke.
“Hm?” Pac trailed his fingers back and forth along Fit’s spine, trying to comfort, waiting for his husband to continue.
“I’ve never loved anyone like this. I feel so much when I’m around you and I- I. I don’t know. I’m not good at the whole ‘verbalizing my emotions’ thing, but… I’m scared, I’m confused.”
Pac squeezed Fit a little tighter, and the two were quiet for a moment before Pac responded, “I’ve never been in love. Not romantically, I never dated someone for more than a few weeks before. The only person I’ve ever loved is Mike, and I can’t remember not loving him. I know how to love Mike, he’s my best friend, but I don’t know how to love you.”
Fit looked up, chin resting on Pac’s chest, “Maybe we can not know together.”
Pac smiled, “We’ll figure it out?”
“Yeah,” Fit nodded, “we’ll figure it out together.” he turned his head, resting his cheek against Pac’s chest again, still looking up at Pac’s face. Pac couldn’t take his eyes off of the other, bringing one hand up to brush his knuckles across Fit’s cheek. The older man’s eyes glittered in the dim light from the lamp in the corner, green and grey and brown streaking together in a masterpiece that made Pac dizzy.
The American smiled up at Pac, eyes drooping a little in drowsiness, “You have very pretty eyes, Fitche,” Pac couldn’t help but remark. A more sober version of himself would have reddened instantly, hiding his face in the collar of his sweater, embarrassed, but the champagne had left him just drunk enough to forgo that emotion.
Fit’s cheeks turned redder again, turning his head to bury into Pac’s hoodie. Pac pulled Fit into a tighter embrace, pressing a soft kiss to the top of Fit’s head as Fit mumbled through the cloth, “I love you.”
Pac smiled widely, burying his grin into the top of Fit’s head, “I love you too, Fit.”
——
After the drunken confessions and heart to heart the two had shared on Pac’s couch, it wasn’t like much had changed, and Pac realized they acted more like an actual couple before than he’d thought. Their Friday movie and takeout hangouts turned to Friday movie and takeout dates, and they started going out on weekends more.
Little by little, they settled into their life together. It was all out of order, they talked about kids before ever moving in together, but their whole relationship had been out of order from the beginning. They found an apartment in a slightly nicer area of the city, with three bedrooms and two bathrooms, close enough to a bus stop and train station that he and Fit could take to work, and he could take to class.
They slipped into domestic life fairly quickly, but a lingering doubt never left the back of Pac’s head.
They were living together, and it had never been a question that Fit would have his own room. When they were touring, he’d remarked that he’d take the room across from the hall bathroom, letting Pac have the en suite bathroom because ‘It would be easier when you shower, less distance to walk without your leg.’
Still, Pac couldn’t help the worry that maybe they had taken too many steps too soon. Sure, they’d been married for years, but they’d only become romantic a few months ago, and maybe moving in together was too fast. Maybe Fit wasn’t ready, maybe he didn’t feel as deeply as Pac did, maybe he was just trying not to hurt Pac’s feelings?
Still, he had to reason with himself, Fit was a fairly touch averse person, sure they leaned against each other often, but that was usually when they were drunk, and almost always initiated by Pac. The other man flinched at sudden touch, and while Pac had noticed it improving since moving in together, he was still hesitant to initiate anything beyond a brush of shoulders, or nudging a knee against a thigh while on the couch.
Maybe it was a matter of trust? Maybe Pac wasn’t doing enough to help Fit feel comfortable in the relationship. He had no experience with something like this, had never been in a serious relationship like this, and he didn’t know if he was doing something wrong.
And yet, if Fit had a problem, why wouldn’t he tell Pac about it? The two had extensively agreed to talk about any problems they had when they moved in together, and Fit had already come to him, asking if he could be a little quieter when he arrived home late from class, and Fit was already in bed.
Fit deserved infinitely better than Pac, he deserved more than the felon who was barely able to afford rent while in school, who could barely boil pasta water successfully. He deserved better than to be stuck with his needy overemotional self for the rest of his life. Whining over his relationship insecurities would get him nowhere.
As always, Pac pushed it down, they had bigger things to worry about, namely their visit from the social worker.
Pac had been corresponding with her over email, and so far everything had gone well, minus a few snags when Pac mentioned his criminal record, but he was able to pass the background check fairly quickly because he wasn’t a violent offender.
The inspection and meeting with the social worker went well too, except for one moment. Pac doubted that Lauren, the social worker, had even noticed, but when touring the house, Pac had called his room his and Fit’s, calling Fit’s a spare room and office. He didn’t really know why he did it. Maybe he just didn’t want her judging their relationship. Sure it wasn’t the usual set up for a relationship, but it worked for them, and that was all that mattered. As long as you ignored Pac’s insecurities about it.
——
“So, I know we talked a little over email about this, but I wanted to speak in person about your reason for wanting to adopt,” Lauren shuffled a few papers around, clicking open her pen as she looked across the table at Fit and Pac.
Pac glanced at Fit, reaching over to grab his husband’s hand for reassurance, “I grew up an orphan, so I guess I just want to give kids a chance to have a family, which wasn’t something I ever really had. I was called a ‘problem kid’” his free hand came up in air quotes, and he felt Fit lace his fingers with his own, squeezing reassuringly, “And that really fu- uh- screwed me up for a while, made it hard for me, still does sometimes, and I don’t want other kids having to be labeled like that, to feel like they’re unwanted, or uh- unworthy of a family.” He took a deep breath, “Because they aren’t, everyone deserves a family.”
Lauren smiled, jotting a few things onto her paper, “Thank you Pac, did you have anything to add Fit?”
Fit glanced over at Pac before speaking, clearing his throat quickly, “Yeah uh- I think just the same things Pac said, I didn’t have the greatest home life growing up, and I want to make sure we can help make a home for kids who need it.” Pac smiled at his husband, giving his hand a squeeze.
“Thank you,” Lauren shuffled her papers around, turning back to Pac, “Okay, I know we talked a little bit about your conviction Pac, and you are still eligible for being a foster parent because it was nonviolent, but I’d like to hear you speak more about it.”
“Oh, uh,” Pac straightened, “I mentioned being an orphan, and yeah, I aged out when I turned 18, and was taking care of my best friend who was a little younger, and we were desperate, and poor, it started as shoplifting, then we got mixed up with some people who were planning a bigger operation, and we got caught, spent five years in prison. We got out of prison, and then off probation early for good behavior, which was about a year ago now.”
Lauren nodded, not looking up from her paperwork, “Alrighty, thank you both for your time, I’ll be contacting you in the next few days to let you know next steps, but I’m fairly confident that you both will be approved, you passed the inspection with flying colors. I wish you the best in the rest of the process.”
Fit and Pac nodded, shaking her hand and thanking her as she left, Pac practically buzzing as Fit shut the door behind her, waving out a goodbye.
The door latch had barely clicked before Pac was launching himself at Fit, unable to contain his excitement, giggling as he squeezed Fit tight, joy bubbling up inside of him.
“Fitche, oh my god,” He pulled back and planted a kiss on Fit’s cheek, “We’re going to adopt a kid! We’re going to be dads!” He let go of Fit’s shoulders to spin around the living room, giggling again.
His fingers pulled outwards as he spun, tingling as his arms were tugged. A rush of emotions flooded his brain, head spinning as he twirled, the living room turned into a colorful, streaking blur.
“Hell yeah we are! And we’re going to be the best goddamn dads ever!” Pac stopped his spin to watch Fit as he talked, dizzy and wobbling slightly, vision tilting as he looked at his husband.
Pac giggled, rushing forward to squeeze Fit into another hug, “Do you think so?” He questioned, still feeling that lingering doubt in the back of his mind.
Fit nodded, squeezing Pac a little tighter and pressing a quick kiss to his hair, “I know we are Pac, you especially, there’s no way this kid doesn’t love you.”
Pac sighed, relaxing into Fit’s arms, the reassurance washing over him gently quieting that annoying voice in the back of his head, “Thank you,” he breathed out, “you’re too good to me Fit.”
It was a long while before they separated again, basking in the joy of the next stage of their life together, happy, and full of love.
——
Pac had always known he wanted to be a dad. When he was growing up in the system, he knew he wanted to help kids get out, to escape the ‘problem child’ label that he and Mike had been branded with as kids. Now though, Fit was driving them home, their son was in the back seat, a real living breathing child that they had the responsibility to care for now. Pac could feel the anxiety welling up inside of himself.
Somehow, Fit seemed to notice, and reached over, pulling Pac’s hand from his lap, lacing their fingers together over the center console. Pac squeezed Fit’s fingers, relaxing just a little into the passenger’s seat.
It was quiet for the rest of the short car ride, and then Fit and Pac were showing Ramón to his room. The boy hadn’t said much, but had smiled softly when they showed him where he could place his things, and they decided to leave him to get used to the new environment, moving to the kitchen to start cooking dinner.
They didn’t say anything as they moved around the kitchen, Pac chopping up the zucchini, and grating the cheese, while Fit started on the sauce, and set a pot of water to boil. They whirled around each other, in sync, Pac already ready with the veggies before Fit even asked, and as Ramón joined them, settling onto one of the barstools with his stuffed animal clutched close to his chest, Pac didn’t feel as scared anymore, just happy.
——
Richarlyson had been a surprise. Neither Fit or Pac were prepared for that phone call one Friday night, nor were they ready to become long-term foster parents to the boy when they’d let him stay with them. Pac had grown fond of the boy in record time though. The two had an unspoken camaraderie, and the boy had quickly turned to him in awe, asking question after question about his prosthetic, what it was like, and how he dealt with the pain.
That last question had sent Pac into a flurry, calling social workers, scheduling doctors appointments to get a referral to a physical therapist and a prosthetist. Richas had ended up getting a new leg, and was running and jumping and playing again, in much less pain now that he had a socket that fit again.
Surprisingly, it hadn’t taken long to get used to having a second child in the house. After they’d decided to foster Richarlyson long-term, they’d rearranged, converting Fit’s old room into a less temporary bedroom for a child, moving Fit’s desk and computer into his and Pac’s shared room, changing the bedspread, getting some posters for the walls, and a few stuffed animals for the bed. Slowly, with the additions of Richas’ art being added to the walls, the room became his own, rather than a room he was borrowing.
By the end of the boy’s first month with them, he was starting to open up some, to fit into their routine now that he was fully enrolled in school, had a schedule of therapy and physical therapy, and movie nights, and things had finally settled down.
It was a normal Thursday afternoon when it happened, Pac home from class, Fit home from work, both of their kids at an after school club or physical therapy. Pac was working on a lab report when Fit walked in the door, but he closed the lid on his laptop before turning towards the entryway, grinning, “Minha vida! Hi!” He sat up straighter, patting the couch next to him for Fit to sit.
He watched as Fit slipped off his shoes, setting his bag down next to them and took a seat on the couch.
“I have something I need to tell you,” Fit said, looking at Pac. He felt his eyebrows furrow, worry passing through him, though Fit rushed to reassure him, “Nothing bad I promise! Just something I haven’t been able to get out of my head you know?”
Pac nodded, waiting for Fit to continue. The other man opened his mouth to speak, but paused, before slamming it shut and starting to pace back and forth between the couch and the TV.
“Fit? Are you sure it isn’t something bad?” Pac was beginning to grow more concerned for his husband.
“No, no,” Fit shook his head, “I- I just have to figure out the right words to say.”
Fit looked up, staring into Pac’s eyes, and Pac couldn’t help but admire how the late afternoon sun through the window caught in his eyes, making them shine gold and grey and green.
Fit’s shoulders rose, then fell, “I love you Pac,”
Pac’s face split in a wide smile, “Awe, meu bem! I love you too!” He felt a bubbling warmth pool up in his core.
Fit shook his head, “No, no I- I’m in love with you Pac, I- eu te amo.” Pac’s eyebrows furrowed, the worry-turned-joy fading into confusion.
“I- uh, was that not a given? I- I thought we were in love?”
Fit’s eyebrows furrowed in return, “Huh? I, I mean, I think I’ve been in love with you for a long time, but I only just realized a few days ago.”
Pac sat up straighter, his whole world feeling like it was shattering, “A few days ago! Fitche, I’ve been in love with you since you encouraged me to go to university.”
Fit hadn’t known they were in love? It had been years since Pac thought they’d made that agreement. He remembered that night after his first day in university. He remembered the emotional confessions of love, and fear, and the promise to stick through it together. Had Fit forgotten? Had he brushed it off as something platonic??? Pac was still frozen as Fit spoke again.
“Pac, that’s- that was like four years ago.”
“I think I started thinking we were together together around the time we first talked about kids.” Pac tilted his head, squinting.
“I- I had no idea.” Fit sat back on the couch, Pac tilting towards him with the “I was having a bit of a crisis the past few days, realizing all the stuff we do that’s romantic, and I guess what you’ve been doing has been romantic the whole time.”
Pac nodded, “I can’t believe you didn’t know, we share a bed Fit!”
“Well we didn’t the first year we lived together, how did that not ring any alarm bells?”
Pac shrugged, not wanting to admit his insecurities about their initial sleeping arrangements. At least he now knew it wasn’t Fit lacking trust in their relationship, it was just his ignorance of their relationship. Though, he wasn’t sure what was truly the worst option, “I just thought you were nervous about physical touch, you’ve always been a big fan of personal space.”
“Wait I was such an asshole, I was the worst husband Pac! You thought we were together and I didn’t even kiss you, or take you on dates, anything like that!”
Pac smiled, shaking his head, “We go on dates, what do you think our Thai food dinners are? We go to the movies just the two of us a bunch too. And we kiss on the cheek all the time, sure it got a little odd after the first year or so, but I thought you were just shy with affection. You always blush at the smallest things, Fitche!” Pac grinned as Fit turned that telltale red.
Fit shook his head, defensive, “No I don’t, what are you talking about?”
Pac leaned forward, teasing smirk on his face as he gently grabbed Fit’s chin in his hands, turning Fit’s face to look at him, “I don’t know Fitche, you’re looking pretty red to me.” He leaned in closed, pressing a long kiss to the red skin of Fit’s cheek. The skin was warm against his lips, and Pac felt himself smile against Fit’s cheek.
Pac slid his hand around to cradle Fit’s jaw, noticing as the American’s gaze dropped to Pac’s lips, “Can- can I kiss you?” His words came out breathless, and Pac was still nodding rapidly in response without even really noticing.
“Yes, yes, amor, Fitche, marido, you don’t know how long I’ve been waiting for you to kiss me.” The words spilled out of him, full of the love he’d held for his husband for the past four years.
Fit smiled, eyes crinkling as he brought his hand up to run through Pac’s hair, leaning in until their mouths met.
Pac sighed, long, and full of love, relaxing into the kiss. There was nothing that felt new about kissing Fit. It was safe, and warm, and familiar. It tasted like the sun. It felt like coming home. He slid his thumb across the skin of Fit’s cheek, over the slightly raised bump of scar tissue that cheek kisses had long since acquainted with his lips. Fit’s fingers running through his hair scratched lightly at his scalp and Pac knew he’d ascended to heaven. He let out a soft hum, leaning ever so slightly into his husband’s hand as the noise vibrated between their joined lips.
When they finally pulled back, seconds or days later, their eyes were half lidded, cheeks dusted with pink, and lazy smiles tugging across their faces. They didn’t stay separated long though, both leaning back in together, smiles too wide for it to really be a kiss, but it didn't matter, five years of marriage, five years of big complicated feelings finally, finally understood.
They pulled back again, foreheads resting against each other as they just breathed. Fit scratched along Pac’s scalp again, and Pac continued to gently rub his thumb back and forth along Fit’s cheek.
Fit’s eyes were still closed, dark eyelashes fanned out across his cheeks. He looked so peaceful. His eyes flicked open, and he giggled, darting forward to press a quick peck to Pac’s lips. Pac giggled too, and they kissed between laughs for a few minutes more before Pac leaned against the back of the couch, head tilting sideways to look at his husband, glowing across the couch from him.
“Meu deus we’re idiots aren’t we.”
Fit laughed, loud and happy, and Pac lit up. Fit leaned further into Pac to press his face into the junction of his shoulder and neck, pressing a soft kiss there as he whispered, “Eu te amo Pac. Darling.”
There was nothing that could describe the warmth that Pac felt when he heard those words. He’d thought he’d felt the full depth of his love for Fit, but this? This was another level that he’d never dreamed of experiencing, hadn’t even known this was something he could hope to feel. He pressed a kiss to the top of Fit’s head, “Eu te amo também minha vida.”
Pac could feel Fit relax into his arms after that. They stayed there in each other’s embrace for a few minutes, before Fit pulled back, glancing at his watch. His eyes widened, and he turned back to Pac.
Pac saw Fit’s panic and looked at his own watch, eyes widening as well, Ramón’s robotics club was over in twenty minutes, and Richas’ PT was over in thirty-five. He shot up, wobbling a bit as he reached for his prosthesis and liner, running a hand through his hair, “You get Ramón, and I’ll get Richas?”
Fit nodded, standing as well, “Sounds good.” He walked towards the door as Pac bent to slide the liner back over his leg, then pulled on the prosthesis.
He stood, putting his weight onto his leg until it clicked into place, reaching down to slip his shoes on, “Fit wait!”
Fit paused, turning from where he was slipping his keys into his pocket. Pac straightened, and then walked over to his husband, cupping his face gently between his hands and giving him a quick peck on his lips. Fit smiled, cheeks turning that pretty shade of pink again, “Okay, let's go get the kids, we’ll talk more tonight right?”
Fit nodded, bringing his flesh hand down to intertwine his fingers with Pac’s and they left the house, walking down towards the train station to pick up their sons.