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It Wasn't meant to be this difficult. It wasn't meant to ruin his day, maybe even his year. It was supposed to be a fun, somewhat friendly challenge.
That was before Varian had lost horribly, at something he was confident in, to Hugo of all people. He watched in shock as Hugo managed to cook up the formula long before Varian had even gotten half way through the process. He hollered out in victory, Nuru and Yong even cheered in celebration for him. Varian stood unblinking, the bulb baster in his hand leaking onto the table below. Hugo turned to look at him, his smile twisting into a cocky grin.
“Guess we have a winner, eh Blue?”
Varian's free hand clenched at his side, his nose scrunched up.
“You got lucky.” He croaked out, sounding unsure and upset.
Hugo laughed, slapping a hand on Varian's shoulder and leaning against him.
“Sure, Tell yourself whatever you need to. Now, if you'll excuse me,” He said, turning on his heel towards the caravan.
“I need to bask in my glory alone for a moment.”
Varian's face heated up with frustration, tears almost welling up in his eyes. He slammed the tool onto the table before yelling after Hugo.
“Don't make a mess on my sheets, you mutt!”
Hugo laughed again in the distance, waving a dismissive hand before shutting the front door. Varian continued to stare as Yong and Nuru's voices blurred around him.
He shouldn't have cared as much as he did. It really wasn't a big deal. Varian was still talented, still the best in his field, still the prodigy child he always knew he was. But then why did it hurt so bad? Why did his chest ache as he thought about it?
He didn't bother to clean up the mess that they'd set up for their little challenge, stalking towards their carriage before throwing the door open.
“I didn't lose!” He yelled out, without causing Hugo to even look in his direction. He hummed in agreement, busy relaxing with his hands behind his head.
“I didn't!” Varian repeated. “It wasn't a fair challenge. Let's go again. Something different this time!” He proposed eagerly, his brows furrowed tightly.
Hugo opened one eye and glanced at Varian in the doorway.
“Oh yeah? Like what?”
Varian thought for a moment, biting his lip anxiously. “We'll let Yong and Nuru decide.”
Hugo opened both eyes now, a smirk spreading across his face.
“Alright, sounds fun. Hour and location, s'il te plaît.”
“Now! No, not now..” Varian trailed off, looking to the floor. “Tonight! At seven o'clock!” He corrected assertively.
“You really fail to deliver, Stripes.” Hugo grunted as he sat up to stretch.
“Alright, I'll be there. You should prepare to have your ass handed to you.”
“Excuse me?” Varian's face flushed, his expression a mix of anger and confusion.
“You're going to lose. Have you never heard that expression before?” Hugo laughed as he stood, pushing past Varian with his hands in his pants pockets.
Varian reddened harder, turning to follow Hugo. “I wasn't raised in a ruffian burrow!” He called out, his fists balled at his sides.
“Right, of course. Prissy little castle boy, huh?” Hugo taunted, venom cutting through his words as he looked back at Varian.
“What? No, I didn't- I'm not-” He shook his head and pointed a finger at Hugo. “That's not what I am!”
Hugo just huffed, a fronting smile plastered on his face. “Go get ready for our challenge, yeah?” And with that, he walked off.
Varian stood there for a moment, feeling that pressing ache in his chest once again.
He didn't plan on preparing for anything, he had confidence that he didn't need to. Of course he was better than Hugo.
—
After informing Yong and Nuru about the proposal, they got right on to setting up some challenges for them to tackle. Usually Nuru wouldn't encourage such behavior, but they Had some time to kill and she was a tad curious to see who'd win.
When seven O'clock came, both alchemists were standing on either side of a table set up outside. The sun was setting around them, causing beams of glowing sunlight to drape over them. The table was lined up with chemicals and minerals, everything they'd need to create a simple curative. Hugo smiled at Varian from where he stood, who in turn stared daggers at him.
“When Yong blows the whistle, feel free to begin. First to complete the solution before this timer runs out, wins.” Nuru declared, wagging the small hourglass she held in her fingers. Varian didn't take his eyes off of Hugo, his glare only hardening. The silence was cut by the shrieking sound of a whistle blowing, causing Varian to get to work.
He lifted his head after a moment, noticing Hugo had yet to begin.
“What are you doing?” He hissed out, his hands still moving.
“I find giving myself breaks improves my work.” Hugo shrugged his shoulders with a smile.
“Break? You haven't even started!” Varian gripped the vile in his hand much too tightly, close to shattering it.
“Focus, Goggles,” Hugo cooed, nodding a finger at Varian's equipment.
Varian just growled under his breath, trying his best to stay concentrated. He poured a neon green liquid into his cup, followed by a cyan colored one, then stirred them together. He was about to push the glass onto his heated plate before being interrupted by the straining whistle sound.
“What?” He called out, looking towards Nuru and Yong. They gestured towards Hugo, who held up his completed solution, swishing it around with mockery.
“How?” Varian cried in disbelief. “There's no way you finished that fast, you must've cheated!”
“Didn't look like it.” Yong said, kicking his legs on the small crate he sat on.
Varian looked to Hugo, his expression contorting between rage and humiliation.
“Fine! You win.” He slid his unfinished curative across the table, crossing his arms bitterly.
“Let's just move on to the next challenge.” He muttered, looking to the ground.
The second hurdle was a battle of strengths. First to carry a barrel full of sand to the finish line wins. Varian had the upper ground here, he was naturally stronger than Hugo and has had a long history of lugging around much heavier things. He would win this one for sure.
“On your marks,” Nuru began, holding a makeshift flag in front of the two racers.
“Get set,” She continued, Yong waiting at the finish line with a pile of chalk in front of him.
“Go!” Nuru swiped the flag, signaling them to start.
Varian carried the barrel with ease, already taking the lead. Hugo seemed to be struggling, but he wasn't too far behind. Varian still felt confident, still knew he could achieve this win. He was nearly at the end when he stumbled, the barrel slipping from his arms. He tried to catch it, but went off balance completely and fell to the ground with a thud. The shrill whistling sound invaded his ears as he lifted his head. Hugo had crossed the finish line.
“No! That's- that's not fair!” Varian whined, getting up to his feet and trudging towards the others.
“I tripped, that doesn't count!”
“Surely footing is something that needs to be accounted for. There were no rules stating a mistake like that could be ignored.” Nuru shrugged, walking closer to them.
“Who's side are you on?” Varian shouted, throwing his arms out dramatically.
“The winning side, clearly.” Hugo jested, using Varian's head as an armrest. Varian knocked him off harshly, taking a step back from the group.
“That isn't right! I want a rematch!” He yelled, his face flushing with frustration.
“Varian,” Nuru sighed, crossing her arms idly. “Let's just continue, okay? This isn't supposed to be serious, and it's getting dark.”
Varian scoffed with disbelief, looking her over before dropping his shoulders and tightening his jaw.
“Fine.” He said coldly. “Let's just continue.”
The next challenge was that of general alchemical and engineering knowledge. The one with the most correct answers wins.
Varian shuffled in his chair, sitting beside Hugo and facing the other two. He clutched two handfuls of his shorts, staring downwards with sad eyes. There was no confidence in this round, no hope, no passion to win. He knew he'd lose again.
“Alright, first question begins now.” Nuru says, clearing her throat before reading from a heavy book in her lap.
“What are some examples of chemicals that are needed to make a gas toxic?”
“That'd be bleach, and a number of different things,” Hugo said smugly, his eyes closed. “Vinegar or Ammonia for example.”
“That's correct!” Yong said, peeking over Nuru's shoulder in order to read the text.
“What is Phosgene?” Nuru asked, looking up from the book.
“Phosgene is a toxic colorless gas, with the formula COCI².” Hugo said, opening one eye to glance at Varian. He seemed sad, disinterested. Not even trying. Hugo's smile fell just slightly.
“Correct. What “A” word defines the scientific study of sound, used to determine the efficiency of engineering projects?”
Hugo waited for a moment, watching Varian, hoping he'd say something, knowing for sure that he knew the answer.
“Acoustics.” He said somewhat quietly.
“You got it.” Nuru nodded, flipping the page for the next question. As she did, Varian stood up. The group's eyes were on him, watching him turn to leave.
“Hey, hey-” Hugo called, grabbing Varian's wrist. “Where are you going?”
Varian pulled away sharply, looking at him through lidded uncaring eyes.
“I'm going to bed. You win.”
“What?” Hugo guffawed, letting out a baffled laugh. He stood to follow Varian, who ignored him on his way to the caravan.
“Goggles!” Hugo called out, catching up to him and grabbing onto him again. “What's going on, what's up with you?”
“Nothing.” Varian Shrugged Hugo off, swinging the front door open and heading inside before slamming the door behind him. Hugo quickly opened it back up and closed it behind him. Varian stood with his back to him, his arms clutching his shoulders.
“You weren't even trying! What happened?” Hugo asked, touching Varian's shoulder lightly.
Varian pulled back like he'd been burned, turning to face him.
“Why should I try? What's the point?” You were just going to beat me anyway.”
“What are you talking about?” Hugo huffed out, his eyebrows contorting with confusion.
“You're better than me, Hugo! At everything! Why should I ever bother to try when I already know exactly how it'll end?” Varian slid his hands down, clenching his fists as he yelled out, tears pricking at his eyes.
“Don't be stupid.” Hugo scoffed, shaking his head.
“Whatever. Congratulations. Go enjoy your win, Hugo, you've earned it.” Varian gave a small short-lived smile, then moved to open the door.
Nuru and Yong quickly moved from where they were eavesdropping, their hands cupped against the door. It swung open fast, Hugo standing in the doorway as Varian ran off into the distance. Hugo called after him a few times, but it was useless.
Nuru gave Hugo an awkward look, unsure of what to say.
“Maybe you should uh,” She looked away, wringing her hands together. “Talk to him?”
“Me? Why?” He cringed, holding his hands up dismissively.
“Well, you're kind of the reason he's upset.” Nuru shrugged.
“That's not fair, I'm always the reason he's upset!” Hugo argued, pressing a hand to his chest.
Nuru sighed, giving Hugo a shove. “Just go! You know how he gets, he could be dangling off a cliff right now.”
Hugo groaned, crossing his arms before leaving to find Varian. Nuru brought Yong inside for bed once he was gone, figuring the night ought to be over.
—
Hugo found Varian sitting on a hill, his legs drawn to his chest with his head buried in his knees.
“Hey,” Hugo began, startling Varian. He looked up at him with red raw eyes, tears staining his cheeks.
“I'm uh,” He hesitated, getting down to sit by Varian's side. “I'm sorry.”
Varian said nothing, looking straight ahead of him.
“C'mon, don't make this difficult for me. I'm not good at all of this mushy comforting junk. Can we just go back, forget about this?”
Varian stayed silent for a moment, still staring forward.
“I don't need your pity. We're not friends, don't treat me like we are.” He said calmly, matter of factly.
Hugo returned his silence, feeling weirdly hurt by that comment. It was true, they weren't friends. They never had been. They're mutually using each other, a means to an end. But it still hurt him, for some reason.
“I spent my entire life trying to get to where I am.” Varian spoke up.
“I've dedicated my life to what I can do, the things I can create. There was a time in my life where I thought I was the best.” He huffed out a humorless laugh.
“But I'm not. I never was. I've wasted my life on something I'm not even good at.”
There was a beat of silence, Hugo felt his heart ache, felt the urge to reach his hand out. To comfort him maybe, or slap some sense into him.
“The truth is,” Varian smiled sadly, turning to look at Hugo. “I'm not the best. I'm not even average. I'm nothing.”
Up until this point, Hugo had never seen Varian this vulnerable. It was never something he planned to see, not something he prepared for. He wasn't sure what to say, what he should do.
“You just love being wrong, don't you?” He said, using the only tactic he knew how to.
“Is now the time?” Varian said quietly, looking at the grass below.
“It's never not the time to correct you.” Hugo smirked, nudging Varian lightly. He didn't react. Hugo frowned, pulling his hand away.
“Look,” He exhaled, unsure of how to go about this. “You're the smartest person I know.”
Varian looked up then, his expression softening just slightly.
“I may give you a hard time,” Hugo shrugged, while Varian scoffed under his breath.
“But honestly, you're the first person I've ever met who I see as an equal.”
He drew his words out a little, as if he didn't want to say them.
Varian lifted his head higher, looking hurt and confused.
“Why are you saying this? What's your angle?”
Hugo sighed, crossing his legs and resting his hands in his lap.
“Does there have to be an angle?”
“In my experience, yeah.”
Hugo hummed softly, looking for the words to say. They sat in silence for a few moments.
“You're a great alchemist, Varian.”
Varian blinked, turning his head to Hugo with wide blown out eyes. The stars above them reflected against them.
“Cherish that, because I'm not saying it again.” Hugo joked with a toothy smile.
Varian breathed out a short quiet laugh.
“You'll say anything to get Nuru off your back.” He looked away again, his small smile faltering.
“I mean it.” Hugo said firmly, causing Varian to glance back at him.
“You're a genius,” He started, looking forward now. “You're creative, innovative, compassionate, and impossibly driven.” He smiled fondly to himself, seemingly in thought. “You're a good leader, an amazing engineer, and a friend to those around you.”
He looked down at the ground below for a moment, his expression more serious.
“If all of that doesn't make you the best, I don't know what would.” He said softly.
He waited a moment before turning to look at Varian, shocked to see his eyes full of tears ready to spill.
“Oh, uh I'm-”
“Thank you.” Varian interrupted, his voice breaking. Tears fell down his cheeks and he hastily rubbed them away, sniffling into his gloves. He seemed like he wanted to say more, but he couldn't catch his breath.
Hugo reached an apprehensive hand out, still not quite sure how to help. Varian shockingly took his hand in his, pulled him forward and lunged in to hug him. Hugo's arms hovered over Varian's back, his face flushed as he let himself be hugged, tears soaking his jacket. After the awkwardness mostly subsided, he hugged back just slightly.
“M'sorry.” Varian muttered into Hugo's chest, pulling back and shaking his head.
“This is stupid. I'm being stupid.”
“No, it's,” Hugo breathed out, their faces suddenly much too close. “It's okay.” He said quietly, his eyes locked with Varian's.
Let's get back to the caravan.” Hugo suggested after a moment, scared of how warm he had gotten.
“Yeah,” Varian agreed, looking away while brushing some hair out of his face.
“we probably should.”
He got up first, brushing his clothes off before wiping at his face again. Hugo followed, walking ahead to lead the way.
“Don't tell the others that I cried.” Varian mumbled, walking to Hugo's side.
“No promises.” Hugo jeered, smirking down at Varian as he picked up speed.
“Stop! I'm serious!” Varian yelled, running after him.