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Sion’s preferences in porn are pretty unremarkable.
It’s not a deliberate choice; he’s constricted by the quick half an hour difference between his clock-out and Riku’s, and how the gallery he works in is a ten minute speedwalk away, and that there’s an additional three minute wait for their apartment’s shitty single elevator that takes another 30 seconds when stopping on each tedious floor. So really, Sion can’t afford to waste what’s left of his precious alone time dissecting which thumbnail looks the best, or which video has the script quality that doesn’t make him want to just never jack off again. Ever.
He types in the website on the search bar and whatever’s on the front page is it. Sometimes he exerts the effort to look for something amateur, because he likes the pretense of authenticity. But most of the time he’s stuck with videos like this— dull and a little cringe— the actual scene doing nothing except to serve as some sort of background noise for his imagination.
And… this video’s not doing it for him.
Sion groans and attempts to find a new one from the recommended. He’s very aware it’s 6:28. Any moment and his phone’s going to ping with a text. Something about dinner probably, or if Sion wants Riku to sneak desserts from the cafe and bring them home. Lately, Riku has taken a liking to stealing from his workplace— a glitch all their friends for some reason blame Sion for. As if Riku’s some flawless angel, who would never think of tucking cookies and honey sticks into his bag if it weren’t for Sion luring him into his evil ways.
And like, Sion’s not saying Riku isn’t a flawless angel— he certainly looks like one, kind of acts like one too if not several layers more spoiled— but the point is Sion didn’t tell him to do that, and if he’s being real, he doesn’t think it’s even what’s actually happening. Sion’s theory is that Riku is so soft-hearted— kind to a fault— that the cafe is selling the desserts that weren’t bought throughout the day at a discount and Riku feels so bad for the people he knows put their energy into making them that he thinks him buying them at half-off is highway robbery. So he’s not really stealing anything— he’s just that good of a person, purchasing at full price. Sion thinks it’s plausible solely because Riku is the best person on earth. Sion isn’t sure if heaven exists but if it does, that’s definitely where Riku came from.
Anyway. The second video’s also terrible, and has a weird angle, and Sion’s phone’s still not pinging so he looks for another. This time, he decides he’s going to stick to it, and he finds one where the guy is the first in frame and is surprisingly really cute.
Black overgrown hair, similar to Riku, has the same build. Sion kind of wishes this lighting wasn’t so shit so he can see his face more clearly. The other guy’s a little bigger, commanding and tall, and the way he approaches—
Sion blinks. Oh.
There are two guys in the video.
Sion’s cheeks flame like he’s not the perv clicking on gay porn at 6:30 on a Thursday. He’s really going to exit out of the tab— he swears he really means to— but the site’s set on auto-play and Riku’s look-alike is sooo cute.
Almost Riku-level cute. Riku has a little more growl to him, a little more edge that makes the contrasting sides of him even more endearing, but still.
Sion’s hand seems to be moving out of its own volition.
Sion wonders if Riku would sound similar to how this guy sounds like, when another guy is kissing him like he’s trying to eat his entire face. A strange thing to envision when Sion’s got earphones whimpering into his skull and his fist on his dick, but he can’t shake the image away. Riku is so— stunning? perfect? out of everyone’s league?— that thinking of him making out with someone feels like Sion’s committing a grave sin, almost. Sion can’t imagine Riku moaning and groaning like this guy, except now when he totally can because his last brain cell is running on Riku-adjacent porn overdrive. Has Riku ever kissed someone? A sour taste spreads in Sion’s mouth.
Has Riku ever kissed someone like that?
Who even deserves to make out with Riku? Surely not the douchebags who hit on him on the street, or the one who tried to ask for his number while Sion was there, shopping next to Riku for their moms’ purses. If Riku was going to be kissed, it needs to be by someone who knows what they’re doing, and will treat him well, like this dude with his boyfriend who’s increasingly becoming very vocal.
Maybe Sion can vet them; Riku is too sweet to break anyone’s heart without giving them a chance, so it’s up to him to decide if they’re good enough. Sion can meet with them before they meet with Riku and tell them to their face how they all failed because they didn’t realize it was a trick question. The answer is no one. There is no one good enough.
But perhaps some of the more delusional suitors will still try. And maybe Riku will like one of them, like them enough to let them do what these two men are doing in the video, let them feel Riku up and have him rubbing his ass against their groin.
How would they look like, Sion thinks. Riku deserves someone as pretty as he is, and doesn’t appear like they snuck into the planet when it was dark out. The closest people Sion can come up with would be their friends, maybe Jaehee, but he’d actually rather die than think of Jaehee making out with Riku, so maybe not. Maybe himself? Does Sion look good with Riku?
Sion’s fingers tighten around his shaft. Oh, why does he look kind of perfect in this imaginary sex scenario of Riku grinding against his cock?
Sion slinks down his headboard and gets more comfortable. This audio’s so crisp. And the vision in his head is 4K-vivid. Riku would look this pretty on top of him. Riku would look pretty anywhere. Riku’s just pretty in general. He’d probably sound like this too. Needy and desperate like he can’t wait to get Sion’s dick in his—
“Oh, f—” Sion almost shrieks when the door swings open. “Oh fuck—” His laptop falls, disconnects from his wired earphones, and now the unmistakable sound of a guy being railed within an inch of his life is echoing along the walls of their room. “Oh fuck.” His dick is still out. His dick is still out. His dick is still out and leaking and he doesn’t know whether he should fix that first or stop this video of two dudes with cocks and balls doing anal.
“I—” Kind, kind Riku is prompted into motion, rushing to the laptop and pausing it himself. Sion gawps at him, rattled. Riku’s eyes flicker to his dick. Sion remembers for the nth time that his entire cock is still out and curses as he yanks his sweats unevenly over it.
A few seconds of tense, overbearing silence cloud over them.
Sion is compelled to clarify: “I’m not gay.” And then, because that sounded too defensive to the point of being offensive— “Nothing wrong with being gay! I just don’t think I am. Gay.”
Riku blinks at him. Sion blinks back. Sion can’t tell what he’s thinking.
“It was the first one on the site,” Sion lies, because he can feel his precum drying on his palm and this is so humiliating. “I got too lazy and didn’t want to look for another. Can I, um.” Sion clears his throat. Wills away the heat on his face and the rapid thrum of his racing heartbeat. “Can I have the…”
Riku, born and raised not to have any shame around people he’s comfortable with, born and raised the baby boy of two sisters, the maknae, born and raised to center himself in the spotlight of attention, a trait he’s carried despite not being around the same family that used to spoil and nurture that characteristic of his— evidently believes it’s a much better option to not give Sion his laptop with gay porn back and instead press play on the gay porn in question, while standing next to Sion, and point out, “I think one of them looks like me.”
Sion wishes the skies would open up and incinerate him where he’s sitting.
“Doesn’t he?” Riku adds, eyes glued to the screen, before he slides to the space next to Sion and propels this situation into comical heights of porn-script similarity. “Hyung, he does, right?”
Sion can’t actually think right now, what with Riku making himself cozy in the bed Sion was still wanking in just minutes ago, unknowing that he was the star Sion’s degenerate imagination has chosen to highlight in that same wanking session.
“He kind of sounds like me, too,” Riku continues in awe, seemingly not understanding Sion’s two seconds away from death by mortification and is acting like everything’s casual. Everything is not casual. Sion still has a boner. “Ah, ah,” Riku moans, head tilted as he bounces on the bed, because that angel face is a lie and a misleading facade, “see, he does, right?”
“I didn’t notice.”
“Really?”
Sion regrets speaking. He regrets waking up at all on this wretched day, if he’s getting down to it, because now Riku’s turning to him all sweet and adorable with those no-fail kira-kira eyes; the same kira-kira eyes he flashes at Sion when he needs Sion to do literally anything. Once, he used it to convince Sion to drive him three hours for a Haikyuu pop-up. After that fake moan, Sion’s head is supplying a very specific non-Haikyuu activity it wants Riku to ask.
“You didn’t, hyung?”
“Not until you said it.”
“But now that I have, do you see it?”
Sion forces himself to look at the screen on Riku’s lap, watching Not Riku’s asshole get pounded into oblivion for a couple of seconds, before he tears his gaze away and focuses it on Riku.
Riku, ever unbearable, side-eyes the video, thoughtlessly copies his look-alike’s expression, and now Sion’s dick is so hard he’s beginning to fear it might explode and take the whole building out.
“Do you see it now, hyung?”
What Sion sees is the return of the recent addition to his spank bank, starring Riku and his newfound ability to level up Sion’s boner as if it just super saiyan-ed.
What Sion sees is a haphazard plan to get Riku on his cock because he’s learning he may not be as straight as he once thought he was, and that the object of his non-straight desires may very possibly be the pretty boy on his mattress trying to prove he’s long lost twins with an amateur pornstar.
“I see it now.”
The smart thing to do is to quit masturbating in the room they share, in which Sion has already been caught dick-handed and had to put in considerable energy not to let that make a dent in his and Riku’s friendship, but, well. He got off work early and Sion doesn’t have to waste time looking for porn vids. Plus he’s finding out he might be gay. Feels as good a reason as any to indulge.
Sure, it’s a bit weird he’s watching the same man who really, really looks like Riku. Sure it’s even weirder Sion wasn’t in incognito and hunted down the video in his history, just so he could click on the profile itself and go through all the other videos they’ve posted because he has a fixation on this guy and apparently this guy alone when it comes to his gayer sexual fantasies, but maybe Sion just has a thing for this specific mix of features. He dated a girl with cat eyes too and Sion still thinks of her fondly. Maybe this is unrelated to Riku. Sion getting a boner from this dude moaning is because of the timbre of his voice in general, that Sion happens to like, not who Sion’s associating the voice with.
“Haaah—”
It’s making Sion’s imagination so much more true to life though, which is complicating things.
“Shit,” Sion hisses.
Because he accidentally picked a video of Not Riku getting eaten out, a similar picture of Riku with his dick spurting precum and his legs spread cements itself into Sion’s long-term memory. And now it’s himself Sion is seeing, face buried in between Riku’s asscheeks. It’s Sion in his own vision, lapping up Riku’s asshole like it’s a goddamn valentine treat.
What’s even worse is Riku looks fantastic in Sion’s imagination. Like objectively speaking, he’s sweaty and glistening, eyes glassy as he pants for breath. Face so flushed the color’s making him look intoxicated. And he’s pulling Sion up, dipping into the same mouth that was just on his ass. Pink tongue peeking out as he licks in, moans into Sion’s lips, huffy and impatient as he tries to taste himself on—
“Sion hyung!”
Sion startles out of his train of thought, eyes opening to find the real Riku with his jaw dropped, gaze meeting his before they flit down to Sion’s dick, that Sion is still valiantly pumping.
“Fuck—”
Sion cums with a choked breath, stare locked on Riku’s face. It lands partly on his hand, partly spilling over his linens. Trickles over his knuckles, slips into the webs in between his fingers. He sees Riku’s eyes track the drip, which would’ve had Sion hard as steel on any regular just-found-out-I’m-seriously-gay day, but is especially dangerous now, with the remnants of imaginary Riku’s actions playing like a broken horny loop meant solely to torment Sion in his brain.
The silence outside the video’s so thick Sion can feel it weighing him down the mattress.
“Is it the same guy?” Riku blurts out, still by the closed door, staring at Sion and Sion’s exposed cock in mild shock. Sion resolutely ignores the demon voice whispering to him how it looks less like shock and more like overt, curious interest.
“It’s the same guy.”
“The one who looks like me?”
“The one who looks like you.”
“Oh.” Riku stands there for a moment, then he approaches him, tilting the laptop screen so he can peek at what was playing. He bends down at first, to see, then seems to think sitting next to Sion even though his wang is on display is a more brilliant idea than pretending none of this ever happened. He doesn’t even flinch when his fingers graze Sion’s jizz on the sheets.
“What’s he doing tonight?” Riku asks plainly. “Rimming? What’s that?”
Honestly, Sion before this video had zero clue. But if he’s basing it on context. “I think it’s eating ass.”
“I didn’t know people called it that.”
Neither did Sion. “I guess it’s a big thing with like, gay people. I’ve seen a bunch of videos with it.”
“But Sion hyung isn’t gay?” Riku turns to him with a guileless expression that suggests he doesn’t really give a fuck if Sion is gay, or isn’t gay, it wouldn’t change much for him, but Sion told him he isn’t so that’s what he’s running with.
Sion bites his inner cheek because he doesn’t know what to say, considering he never even entertained the idea of being gay until he started conjuring extremely detailed fantasies of Riku. Thoroughly and on a lot of flat surfaces. One time, with his fingers in Riku’s mouth while Sion pinned him against the shower wall and fucked him open. Some other time, with Sion sliding into Riku’s bed in the middle of the night and dry-humping him to sleep.
“...I might be.”
Riku frowns slightly like he does when he’s processing, then his face lights up, excited. The reprieve it brings Sion is instantaneous and immense. He almost forgets his cock’s still hanging out in the open.
“So this is like you studying?” Riku lifts his legs on the bed as well, resting a mindless hand on Sion’s thigh while he uses the other to pull the laptop more centered between them. Sion scoots over to allow him more space and finally tucks his boner in. “Is he really good then? This guy, I mean? Cause he’s your favorite.”
He’s my favorite because he resembles you, Sion would say, except coming out is already a pretty big deal. Coming out and adding you made me realize I had something to come out of might be pushing it. “I don’t know if I can tell who’s good and who isn’t yet.”
“Oh, riiight,” Riku agrees. “Cause you’re new.”
“Yeah,” Sion breathes out, hyper aware of the one-centimeter-distance between Riku’s hand and the tent under his sweats. “Think I’d need to have experience with a guy first before I give out any opinions.”
“But what do you think you’ll do when you try?”
Riku removes his palm on his thigh to switch to a different video, which would’ve been disappointing, until he places it right back and a smidgen closer to where Sion wants it to be.
“Like would you be doing… this?” Riku says, eyes on the video that’s showing a very pointed frame of the other guy sliding his cock into Not Riku’s ass. “Or… that,” Riku tilts his head as the scene switches, showing Not Riku in all his glory, dazed and whimpering as he holds his legs up.
“Uh.”
Riku looks at him, anticipating.
“Probably… the first one?”
Riku mouths a soundless, “Ahhhhh,” then says, “I can see that,” and finishes it off with, “I think I’d be the other one,” as if this evening’s shitshow didn’t begin with him making Sion admit the porn he prefers needs to have the actor that looks damn near related to him. Which means all this curious sex talk is doing nothing but riling Sion up.
“Perfect match, then.”
Perpetually animated, Riku’s eyes widen. Sion holds his stare, and sure enough Riku doesn’t last, can’t last, immediately turning away and fixing his gaze to the laptop screen. His ears are red. Confirming to Sion that he’s read him right— thank god. It’s his biggest tell. Thank god for Riku and his chronic inability to look Sion in the eye for more than three seconds.
“Riku.”
Riku clears his throat, shy, and so cute. Sion leans in, angling himself so they’d be more face to face. Riku’s head instantly whips towards the opposite side of the room. Sion has to resist the impulse to manually return it forward.
“Riku-chan.”
“I can’t handle this,” Riku mumbles, a little resentful, like he’s mad at himself that’s the case.
“What happened? You were doing just fine five minutes ago.”
“Stop looking at me,” Riku’s fully whining, glancing thoughtlessly at Sion before staring at the wall again. “Oh my god, seriously—”
“Why? It’s fun,” Sion replies, faultless. It is fun. Riku has a charm to him that morphs his shyness, makes it endearing and near irresistible. Like sometimes Sion has to talk himself out of teasing Riku just because he feels he’s already overdoing it. And he overdoes it a lot. Because Riku’s adorable. “You’ve literally stared at me with my dick in my hand—”
“Hyung!”
“—but you’re still acting like this.”
Sion gives in to his demon voices and grabs Riku’s jaw to force him to face him, swallowing a laugh as Riku lets out a familiar strangled noise and pools all his energy into resisting. He tries to leave the bed but Sion yanks him by the arm, rough-houses him down, a mess of tangled limbs as Riku shows unwavering determination in his attempt to escape.
He’s always like that, always wants to flee. It’s like a game— dishes it out but he can’t take it. Flirts with Sion like it’ll kill him not to but god forbid Sion catches his eye. 9 times out of 10 Riku would rather talk to air while spit-firing compliments— Sion hyung’s so handsome, Sion hyung’s so hot, I’d 100% date Sion hyung just from how pretty he is— and then he can’t even really look at Sion unless Sion’s distracted by something else and not looking back at him.
The laptop falls, and just like he often does Riku tries to cash in on that distraction, but Sion has always been stronger, is still stronger than Riku, and manages to pin him to the mattress with one knee on Riku’s parted thigh and his forearm pressing down firmly on his heaving chest.
Riku meets his stare for a second and then he’s squeezing his eyelids shut, huffy and embarrassed, “Why are you doing this to me?!”
“You came onto me,” Sion retorts, watching Riku sputter and turn red like he wasn’t sidling up to Sion while Sion’s dick was out and telling Sion he’s a bottom— when absolutely no one asked. “Oi. Riku.”
Riku peeks one eye open, then seems to deem that unbearable and immediately closes it shut.
“How’d you know about that?” Sion asks, running over everything Riku’s said and itching for an answer. Sion knows he wants to do the fucking because that’s the role he kept playing in his fantasies. How the hell does Riku know he’d prefer to bottom? “Have you ever done that with anyone?” The thought leaves Sion incensed.
“Done what?” Riku fixes his gaze to the ceiling. “What are you talking about?”
“Has anyone ever topped you before,” Sion explains, patient.
“Oh my god— no!” Riku replies hurriedly, pink to the neck. “I’ve never even— I don’t even know who I’d be doing that with!”
“Lots of options.” Sion remembers those fictional suitors who would never deserve Riku and gets irritated all over again. “Don’t act like you don’t know people want you.”
Riku finally looks at him. Sion blanches, his lack of oversight catching up to the corner he’s backed himself into. “Do they?”
Sion doesn’t respond, momentarily stunned in part because Riku’s not yielding. Riku always yields. It’s his pattern.
“Do they, Sion hyung?” Riku repeats, and then all of Sion’s rational thought is overridden by an abrupt need to let Riku know that yes, actually. Sion is one of many. Riku is beautiful and wanted. Yes, they most certainly do.
It’s so weird. It’s so weird because he’s so aware this is Riku, who’s his roommate, and a man, and Sion is also a man but this is still happening and it’s foreign and new and Sion has never kissed a guy before and he’s pulling away because it’s dawning on him how he didn’t even ask— he didn’t even know he was going to do it, didn’t realize he was doing it until it was already done— but then Riku hauls him back because evidently he doesn’t hate that Sion didn’t ask and then Riku’s clutching at the middle of his shirt, yanking it down like he’s stopping Sion from sitting up and suddenly— it’s not so surreal and strange, that Sion’s kissing Riku.
Sion would prefer something calm that involves direct statements of needs and wants but then that wouldn’t really be Riku, would it? Wouldn’t really be Riku if everything was that easy, if there was no challenge before the kiss. Wouldn’t really be Riku if Sion didn’t have to literally manhandle him into staying still.
Riku parts his lips so Sion can lick into his mouth and seriously, wow— not even the relentless reminder that this is a nerve-wracking moment meant to change the trajectory of his life forever will deter Sion. It’s just fucking hot. Riku’s fucking hot. And tastes like those gummies he loves to munch on. He was probably snacking on them on his walk home, headphones covering his ears, looking cool as hell, Maeda Riku. The prettiest thing any of those passerbys would have seen today. Sion’s so glad he’s the one Riku’s chosen to make out with the relief is making him delirious.
“You’re a good kisser, hyung,” Riku says, rushed, his chosen method of retaliation seemingly being this half-hearted attempt to make Sion just as flustered as he is. Unfortunately for him, Sion’s horny and growing more deranged by the second.
“Yeah?” Sion drifts his mouth to Riku’s neck and experimentally grinds down. Then he’s grabbing Riku’s hips and doing it again because that friction felt fucking phenomenal. God. Everything feels phenomenal. Frenching Riku, being on top of Riku, slotting himself in between Riku’s legs. Riku must agree because his expression has morphed into something more unguarded, encouraging Sion into rocking down with more purpose until Riku’s pressing his face against the pillow, a muffle, whimpering as their dicks rub together over their pants.
“Hyung, this is my first time,” Riku babbles, sounding like he means for it to be lighthearted, but failing because his voice is too soft and shaky and breathless. “Yours, too. A little fast but we’re doing a really good job.”
Sion can’t help but laugh, and kiss Riku with that laugh, finding it hilarious and endearing Riku’s giving realtime reviews of their performance. He’s so cute. Dear god, Riku’s really fucking cute. And the cutest thing about him is he knows and loves that he’s cute— would get upset when his aegyo goes unnoticed, hell, would use his displeasure to be even cuter, pouting and whining and weaponizing those kira-kira eyes against Sion.
Sion props his weight up on extended arms, hovering on top of Riku as he grinds their cocks together. Memorizes how Riku looks in the specific instance— that red tint on his ears that Sion has no doubt he’s mirroring, how puffy and pink his lips are. Admits, “I really wanna fuck you— but I don’t know how.”
“I do.” And before Sion can start monologuing about men that don’t exist, Riku clarifies, “I figured it out earlier than hyung did. That I. That I liked guys.” He turns several shades of red deeper. “It’s kind of hard not to when I… live with you.”
Sion slows into a stop. Riku freaks out and makes a screeching noise suggesting that was last thing he wanted.
“Me?”
Riku blushes and spaces out, acting like if he doesn’t move or say anything he’ll disappear to the naked eye.
“Me?” Sion insists, measured, tilting Riku’s face back when Riku tries shying away to stare at the wall again. “How long?”
Riku groans. Opens his mouth. Sucks his lips in. Squirms. “...I don’t know, maybe a couple of months?”
“And what did you do in those couple of months?” Sion asks, comprehension working overtime to connect all the dots that could be connected, glue together all the hints and pieces.
Sion’s only really been going through this realization for a few days, but even then he’s got a catalogue of scenarios in his head so colorful it should make him embarrassed. Like in one of them they’re in a magical world where Sion moved to Fukui— he doesn’t know why he moved to Fukui— and Riku was the nice, generous angel who let him stay for the night and also let Sion fuck him inside his hometown bedroom. So how was Riku’s personal experience, that Sion had no idea was even happening. Riku knows what he wants, knows how to get what he wants— Sion hasn’t gotten that far. What exactly were the steps that led Riku to that revelation?
“Did you think about me?”
Riku freezes, lips parting in silent guilt. Sion’s gaze roves over his face, woozy, winded. He did. He thought about him.
“What did you do, when you would think about me?” Sion rolls his hips leisurely, letting it drag. Letting Riku feel it. Riku lets out a shaky exhale loud enough for Sion to hear. His fingers fidget restlessly with the sheets. Sion dips his weight, more and more until their hips are rocking flat together.
“Did you touch yourself to the thought of me, Riku?”
Riku croaks out a moan incriminating to his cause. Sion shifts, wanders his hand down, meaning to undo Riku’s pants, but diverts to a path under Riku’s tshirt after he accidentally grazes the soft flesh of Riku’s stomach. Sion sits up, feeling a surging urge to fully look at Riku. He likes looking at Riku. He needs to see what Riku looks like while he hikes Riku’s shirt up, luxuriating on the feel of his skin against Sion’s palms. Riku’s trembling under his touch, but it’s not enough for Sion. Not enough for the pent-up energy he’s been keeping in check since that first night Riku walked in on him. Not enough for the compounded fantasies he’s been stacking hour by hour— faintly, Sion’s worried he’ll always feel like this when it comes to him.
He’s always had a deep-seated claim over Riku, even when they were just friends, it was there, in the form of unease when Riku would hang too close to someone else, would talk too fondly about people who aren’t Sion. Sion had thought it was simply him being protective but he’d been wrong. Greedy. It’s greed. A quiet hunger. And now Riku’s, what? Telling him it’s been months since he could’ve licked the plate? That kind of admission requires a level of restraint Sion does not possess.
“Sion hyung?”
Sion tracks his palms up, brushing over Riku’s sides, feeling it bloom under his touch. Peers down at Riku as he spreads his hands, runs them over Riku’s chest, conspiratorial. Would it feel good? Sion eyes Riku. From that twitchy demeanor, Riku probably knows it would.
Riku whimpers when Sion grazes a nipple. Jolts and wraps panicked fingers around Sion’s wrist before Sion can rub it down with his thumb. Riku’s breathing so hard. Nervous, maybe? Most likely embarrassed. Sion allows him a second before he tries again, a little surprised when there’s barely any force pushing him back.
Riku turns to quiet himself against the pillow again, then lets out a protesting noise because Sion’s keeping him from angling to the side.
Sion takes his time. Steadies Riku into immobility before he leans in, lips tracing a line of phantom kisses up his stomach. Riku’s shuddering under his mouth. This is probably worse for him in a way— Riku would most likely choose to make it quick, if not solely to minimize any chances of him and Sion locking stares at some point in the act, but Sion sort of doesn’t care that it’s worse for Riku, busy logging down how the contours of his abdomen contract, how his breath hitches, how his whining sounds— merging reality with his fantasies that he has no doubt will backfire after this night and would probably result in intensified wet dreams that have Sion dry-heaving as soon as he wakes up.
He pushes Riku’s shirt up higher with his fingertips, palms grazing his nipples as he slides them outward. Riku won’t stop squirming, and whimpering, a tender, muted sound that consistently licks heat up Sion’s spine. Riku’s touch flits to different parts of Sion’s body as if he can’t decide whether to hold onto him, or stop him, watching Sion trace his lips around a stiff nub until Sion looks up from under his lashes, meets his gaze, Riku flustering and pulling the pillow to his face.
“Hyung, I can’t breathe,” Riku complains weakly, like he’s not literally suffocating himself, “I think I’m gonna pass out.”
Sion ignores him to focus on closing his mouth around the nipple, toying with it with his tongue while his fingers tease the other nub. A sharp breath escapes Riku. Sion sucks harder to draw more out. Riku grinds up into him in his writhing, that Sion instinctively returns, laving his tongue over Riku’s chest, alternating which nipple gets his mouth and which gets his hand, all while he pulses into him and idly wonders if he can make Riku cum like that.
“Hyung—” Riku calls again, more garbled than before, and then he’s pawing at Sion, like he wants to pull him up but he doesn’t know, can’t remember how. He shoves at the pillow until it lands on the floor and then, “Mmn—” Sion swallows Riku’s moan as he reconnects their lips, putting more pressure into his hips to rub Riku down. Riku can’t stop shivering, fingernails sinking into Sion’s arms as if that’ll get Sion not to notice. He’s close, Sion can tell, so Sion speeds up his pace, grinding against Riku until Riku’s gasping into him, eyes shut as his body stills under Sion and he creams in his pants.
Sion pushes himself up on his wrists and then he’s cumming too, looking down at a dazed Riku as he loses his rhythm, Riku too in his bliss to be self-conscious how his glassy eyes are peering up at Sion, open and vulnerable, shirt still hiked up to his armpits and his lips still raw and damp, sweaty and shaking as he watches Sion grow erratic in his climax.
Sion lands on top of him after it, Riku winding his arms around him while he catches his breath. The wet spot in Sion’s sweats feels disgusting, but with Riku acting like this, sweet and snuggling against the side of his head like an appreciative cat, legs looping around his hips as if to make sure Sion doesn’t leave, Sion can’t say he really minds.
Sion isn’t given the luxury of obsessing over it. He still tries though, despite his busy schedule, on account of him having Riku living in his head every second of every damn day regardless.
To Sion’s credit, the third time it happens, he really wasn’t doing anything inappropriate.
Clocked out of what felt like an eternal work week, took a hot shower to relax, walked out of the bathroom to change. Riku came home and Sion was so exhausted he didn’t even notice him at first, still in his towel rummaging for clothes when he became cognizant Riku was in the room with him. Then he asked how Riku’s day was, because he’d missed talking to him. Riku said it was okay. Riku asked him how his day was too. Sion said awful, because he couldn’t find this one tshirt he really liked and then he was turning around to complain about it and promptly short-circuiting because Riku was wearing said tshirt.
After that, it was a bit of a blur. Sion remembers seeing Riku blushing, and then Riku’s stare following an insolent water droplet down the middle of his abs, and then Sion may have flexed a little because a scheme has mystically conjured itself in his mind and then he’s giving Riku bedroom eyes and then they’re making out.
So, did he plan all of it? Absolutely not. Did he however seize his chance when it was presented to him, all while being mind-blown by the epiphany that he was looking for that shirt precisely because it was Riku’s favorite?
Who wouldn’t have?
“We— really need to talk,” Sion manages in between kisses, and in between pulling Riku into the bed and onto his lap, despite only wearing a flimsy towel that’s one wrong move away from being completely useless.
“What about?” Riku says, preoccupied, slinking his arms over Sion’s shoulders as Sion kisses down his neck.
“This?”
Truthfully, Sion would rather eat glass than initiate any conversations about feelings and relationships and more mortifyingly, labels— but the combination of anxiety over a talk that he knows needs to happen and the fact that every time he closed his eyes this week, all he could see was Riku’s blissed out face when he came— this is more about stress-relief than anything else. Like what are they? Are they fuck buddies? Roommates who dry-hump? Boyfriends? Sion’s never been great dealing with indecision. It’s at large why he appreciates Riku so much; a clearer head in the midst of Sion’s uncertainty.
“This?” Riku repeats, like he’s thinking about it, but Sion’s also trying to suck a hickey on his throat so he gets distracted fast.
Sion may be doing it on purpose. He’s a little scared. He doesn’t think he’d take it well if Riku tells him they really are just roommates who dry-hump.
“I—” Riku’s cut off by Sion pulling his shirt up, then by Sion pushing him onto the mattress and kissing him again. It goes on for a while. It goes on for as long as Sion’s heart is still pounding against his chest, thoughts foggy with fears of impending heartbreak. He thinks Riku gets it a bit, can see through him, because he’s kissing back earnestly, a gradual comfort to Sion’s internal panic. And then Riku’s pulling him away to breathe, panting softly as Sion peers down at him.
After a few moments, Riku glances at Sion before averting his gaze. “...Are you asking me to decide or are we having a discussion?”
“You decide.”
Riku sneaks another glimpse. Flusters and gnaws on his bottom lip. Sion resists the strong urge to suck it free. “If…” And Sion impresses himself how many mini heart attacks he can survive in a span of a second and a half, “...I say we’re dating—”
Riku doesn’t get to finish because Sion’s back on him in his relief, trying to somehow communicate his gratitude through really intense frenching. “Mmph—”
Sion is on a single-minded mission to defy science. Surely if he tongues into Riku’s mouth deep enough, Riku would understand.
“Hyung—”
“No take-backs,” Sion says, firm, and then Riku’s gasping because Sion’s dragging a stripe on the line of his jaw then giggling a little which is so so so adorable and then he’s letting out a screech, because he accidentally yanked Sion’s towel off.
“Oh my god!”
“Why?” Sion asks, feeling a lot more pompous now that they’re official— official! “It’s nothing you haven’t seen before.”
Riku— Sion’s sweet, sweet angel, his spoiled baby, his princess— actually covers his eyes with his hands like he hasn’t ogled Sion’s dick twice, on separate occasions. “Why does it look bigger?!”
Sion groans, cock twitching. He tosses the towel aimlessly before prying Riku’s hands off, pinning them on either side of his head. Riku’s gaze flits down to Sion’s dick briefly before he lets out a strangled noise and squeezes his eyes shut. Sion presses on his wrists. “Why does what look bigger?”
Riku colors redder than what Sion thought was humanly possible, and then he’s letting out a questioning sound as Sion moves from the bed. There’s the click of the light switch, the room washed in darkness.
“Better?” Sion doesn’t receive a verbal response, but he’s immediately hauled down once he’s close enough to the mattress.
Riku’s legs wind around him, hands feeling for Sion’s jaw before he pulls him in for a hungry kiss. Riku’s whining so much louder. Like so much louder. Sion doesn’t know what that means. He sounds frustrated, but he could’ve said he liked the lights on and didn’t—
“Hyung, I really like you,” Riku confesses, braver when he’s semi-hidden, reconnecting their lips for an affectionate smooch. Sion laughs unsurely because he has no idea what brought this on. “That was so sweet. Oh my god, hyung.”
“What was sweet?” Sion asks, honest. Riku just whines again. “Tell me so I can do it more.”
“So you can…” Riku starts, and then whatever it is he wanted to say gets lost in another frustrated noise and a kiss that tops all the other kisses they’ve had— all the kisses anyone’s had ever. Sion lets Riku lick between the seam of his lips— he shouldn’t be asking questions, really, whatever it is that’s going on with Riku’s working out for Sion anyway— but then Riku goes insane and sucks on his tongue and holy shit?! Sion’s fingers dig into Riku’s waist, earning a moan. He had no idea Riku got down like that. If he knew all it took to unleash it was getting Riku in the dark, he would’ve busted all the lights in the building weeks ago.
“Hyung,” Riku calls, in that oh my god I can’t believe it tone. Sion can believe it. He’s pretty sure the last half hour just stamped itself into his pre-death highlights; top two spot and it’s not number two. “Sionie hyung,” he whispers, “can I suck you off?”
Sion squawks. This is a huge step up from the entirety of Riku’s passive contribution last time. Sion’s been wishing for it but he’s also not entirely sure he’s equipped to handle this side of him. Also he’s strangely so proud of Riku?!
“Can we do it like this?”
Sion spends a solid five seconds and still doesn’t understand what he’s trying to say. “Like—”
“Like you can come up to my face, while I’m lying down,” Riku explains, shy but not as shy as he would’ve been with the lights on. “And then you just. Fuck it.”
Sion’s brain genuinely feels like it breaks and dies, and in its place a new, wrinklier brain is reborn, coming with brand new fantasies and ideas, reoriented to Riku’s request. Sion shuffles quick, half because Riku might change his mind, mostly because if Riku does change his mind Sion will instantly stop and he sort of wants to get his dick in Riku’s mouth before that happens. Riku squirms when Sion sits up, Sion’s eyes adjusting to the lack of light and showing him Riku trying to shrug his pants off. Sion helps him. And then Sion’s climbing on top of Riku, like Riku instructed, pausing when he’s positioned with his knees on either side of Riku’s neck.
Sion may have legitimately blacked out because he doesn’t remember what went on next. When he comes to, he’s already thrusting into Riku, Riku keeping his lips parted as he holds Sion’s hips, guiding him into a faster rhythm. He can see Riku looking at him, dazed as he peers up, raising his head a little to push Sion even deeper into his throat. It’s so fucking hot. Sion’s mind begins supplying sentiments that sound a whole lot like marriage vows. They devolve into outright wedding bells when Riku gags, and still doesn’t let Sion pull out.
In spite of himself, “Enough,” Sion reprimands gently, carefully pulling Riku back by his hair, mostly out of concern. He regrets it as soon as Riku whines in protest. Not so much he’d do it again, because he’s still worried, but it makes him shift down, to where he’s slotted in between Riku’s thighs, kissing Riku again as a pacifier. It’s so sloppy— from Riku’s spit, not fully dried on his chin, and from Riku himself whose preferences in making out seemingly being nasty, open-mouthed tongueing.
Sion indulges him until Riku’s no longer sulking, then he’s moving lower, marking bruises on Riku’s neck, his collarbones, his chest. Sion slows to pay attention to Riku’s nipples, Riku moaning and sinking his hand into his damp hair, cock grinding against his abs in the process. Sion keeps his fingers on both nubs, teasing and rubbing as he shifts further down, pressing a trail of kisses down Riku’s stomach. Sion still sucks Riku’s dick a bit, because it feels wrong to skip it, then he pushes Riku’s legs up. One of them twitches. Riku follows Sion’s hand when it grabs the pillow next to him. He only speaks once Sion’s slid it under his lower back, propping up his hips.
“Hyung?”
“Princess, I’m gonna eat you out, okay?” Sion slides his palms across Riku’s inner thighs. Squeezes. Riku whimpers and drops his head back, a muted go-ahead. “It’s probably gonna be terrible but I really want to do it.”
In Sion’s defense, it’s his first time. He’s not some ass-eating prodigy, there’s a learning curve to this. So he gives himself grace when he doesn’t know what to do, doesn’t even know how to touch Riku, jittery when he pries Riku’s asscheeks apart before he gains a little more courage and runs a curious thumb over his hole. Riku reacts full-body. Lets out one of those sweet noises that sliver straight into Sion’s cock. Sion takes that as his cue to lean in, brushing his lips around the thin sensitive skin before he laves his tongue over it. Riku gasps, sharp, hole clenching against his lips.
Sion tries a variety of methods so he wouldn’t overthink. He starts licking, which is when the noises begin, and then he licks more meticulously, lapping over the areas he noticed Riku whimpered the loudest from, and then he starts making out with Riku’s asshole, making out with it like it could french him back, this cute little thing. Making out with it until Riku’s hole is wet and softened with his spit and like if he tried slipping a finger inside, it would sink in without a hitch.
“Ah—”
Sion tries fucking Riku with his tongue, and then Riku’s letting out sounds that resemble mating calls Sion only ever hears from his family’s farm or on National Geographic. Every shaky moan of hyung primes Sion into doing better, driven by what feels like a carnal need to push Riku over the edge. Sion sucks and licks and kisses, Sion slides his tongue inside and out then finally adds a finger to the mix. He does it thoughtfully, stocked with passive knowledge that there’s something in here he needs to find, and then he’s getting his reward swift, Riku shuddering to his toes as he spills precum all over his belly, forearms covering his eyes as Sion continues rubbing into his prostate.
“Oh god,” Riku says, except he doesn’t really say oh god, because his voice is cracking. He’s grabbing at everything he can reach like he can’t think about it— pulling at the sheets, at the sides of the pillow, fisting his own hair— spasming involuntarily in front of Sion while Sion suckles around his stretched hole and keeps massaging that spot inside him.
Sion actually feels it as Riku loosens up, which is fucking crazy. He didn’t know it’d be like that, didn’t know he’d physically be able to tell, confirming his assumption when he adds a second finger into Riku and it slides in easy. Distantly, he remembers his lube’s under the corner of the bed. He drives his fingers harder, trying to come up with a plan to procure the bottle when—
“W-wait—” Riku gasps, hands flying to clutch Sion’s arms. Sion pauses a beat late then Riku’s whining, a stretched high sound, thigh twitching as he cums.
“Oh, fuck.”
“Oh god—” It’s still going. Riku won’t stop shaking. Sion attempts to pull his fingers out but Riku chases after it, Sion taking the hint and experimentally grazing his prostate. Riku’s nails sink into his skin as he writhes. Sion presses harder, deliberate, and then he’s doing it with more pressure, shifting to be on top of Riku, held up on one elbow as he rubs into the same spot.
“Hyung,” Riku sobs. Sion kisses the tear tracks on his cheeks. Alternates the force of his fingers and keeps Riku bent in half with his weight. “Hyung—”
“Good?”
“Hyung,” Riku just cries out again, louder, arms sliding around his neck. “It won’t end—” It really won’t, Sion can feel it against his dick. His length resting on Riku’s belly that’s slick and still pooling more cum over it.
Sion lifts his hand up and swipes it over Riku’s stomach, wetting his fingers, then he’s slipping three into Riku before he can complain at the loss, feeling Riku tense a little before Sion returns to that spot. Riku moans, distracted by sensation. He’s grinding his ass into it now, rocking into Sion’s hand while he sweats and trembles. It takes very little time before he spasms again, rutting up furiously while Sion fucks him with his fingers. Before Sion can ask, because he’s pretty sure he just punched out Riku’s second orgasm, Riku’s breathing out in a rush, “Do it now— Now, hyung—”
“Now—”
“Now,” Riku repeats firmly, or as firm as he can sound with his voice scratchy and barely there.
Sion doesn’t have to be told twice; he makes quick work fishing out the lube, all while he may or may not be conveniently forgetting to grab a condom with it and telling himself he’ll just get one if Riku asks. Riku doesn’t. Sion slicks himself up, smearing some onto Riku as well, then rubs the length of his dick against his hole before breaching the tip in, stopping when he feels very little give. “Shit.” It’s like pushing a fucking couch through a very soft, yet tiny door. A snug fit.
“Keep going.”
Sion shoots Riku a concerned look— Riku’s on demon time with his pain tolerance so it’s up to Sion to gauge whether he’s really getting hurt— still reluctant until Riku’s ankles lock around his hips and drag him in deeper. Sion groans, toppling over, enveloped by the overwhelming feeling of hot-wet-tight that continues on and on until he’s fully sheathed because Riku’s impatient as fuck and doesn’t want to do any waiting.
“You can move—”
“I swear to god,” Sion bristles, glowering at Riku. He’s pretty sure he read somewhere that there has to be some sort of adjustment period for this. Sion does not believe Riku has a bionic asshole that’s impervious to physical injuries. “Have more care for your own well-being,” he scolds.
“But it doesn’t hurt,” Riku argues, whiny, as if saying that means anything. He begins rocking against Sion to prove his point. “See.” Riku uses his arm to gain momentum, and Sion considers stopping him despite how good it feels— he really does— but Riku also keeps shifting like he’s looking for an angle and is growing more aggravated the longer he doesn’t find it and it’s just— “Ah!”
“Too spoiled,” Sion chides, starting off slow before building to a faster rhythm, Riku’s whimpering dialing up to ceaseless moaning because unlike him, Sion actually knows where to aim.
Sion rises to have more control over his thrusts, gripping the back of Riku’s thighs. Looks at where he’s sinking into Riku, becomes a little entranced with how Riku’s wrapped around him. His rim’s pulled taut around Sion, a stretched ring that’s choking him at the base. Clinging every time Sion cants back, keeping his cock from from pulling out completely. Sion squeezes more lube when he feels a slight chafe— that Riku doesn’t even complain about, which is precisely why Sion has to be vigilant with him— and then he’s pounding into Riku harder, hauling him onto his dick whenever he inches up the bed, that hot-wet-tight feeling amplifying as Riku spills so much precum over himself it’s forming a damp outline on the mattress.
“H-hyung—” Riku clenches around him, grabbing his own hair and whining when Sion forces him still with a firm hand on his hip. Sion grunts, crouching down to lick the drool that’s dripped from his lips, then tongueing into Riku’s mouth, like Riku likes, his thrusts losing rhythm as he inches close to the edge. “Oh god—”
Sion attempts to slow down again, pacing himself, only to be rallied back into action when he draws a dissatisfied howl from Riku.
“Sionie hyung,” Riku sobs, which Sion tries very hard to filter out. “Why— You don’t like it?” His airy pouty tone’s doing the heavy-lifting for his appeal. “You don’t— feel good? You don’t feel good inside me?”
“Fuck.”
Riku folds his legs around Sion as he slams into him, the force of it slightly skidding them down. Sion’s going to cum. His balls feel tight, his dick so hard it feels like it’s spearing through Riku. Everything made worse with the sharp slap of skin and Riku’s ah-ah-ah reverberating in the room, sounding monumentally better than any porno Sion’s ever watched. His only respite is he’s pretty sure he’s at least got it in him to pummel Riku’s out first. Maybe. If he tries kissing Riku’s neck and toying with his nipples—
Riku cums with a broken whine, arching into Sion’s touch as Sion fucks him through his orgasm. Sion grunts, following shortly after, Riku sliding up the mattress from how deep he’s trying to sink his dick in. “O-oh—”
Sion pushes and pushes and pushes, only stopping when Riku’s head reaches the bed end, groaning as he spurts inside him. He’s whiting out for several moments before he collapses on top of Riku, exhausted. A long minute passes. Sion pulls out, careful, then tiredly rolls to the bed.
“That was a whole workout,” Sion concludes to fill in the silence, buzzing from his high, running a hand through his damp hair and wincing. He needs another shower.
“...Hyung,” Riku says, eyes closed and his legs laying flat again. “Thanks for liking me back.”
Sion stills, then lets out a soft laugh as he musters the last of his energy to cuddle Riku. Riku turns to cradle himself in Sion’s arms, squirming until he’s comfortable— or as comfortable as he can be when he’s still filled with Sion’s load— tucking his head under Sion’s chin as Sion pulls him closer.
“Seriously,” Riku adds, apparently not done. “Cause you’re really hot… so I appreciate it.” Sion presses his mouth against Riku’s head to muffle his laughter. “Do you think if we walk down the street in couple outfits, people will look at us and say you’re the hotter boyfriend?”
Sion tips back to gaze at Riku curiously, amused.
“...I’m the hotter boyfriend, hyung,” Riku leans up to meet his stare with a stony expression, not breaking even when Sion bursts out into a cackle. “Do you agree?”
“I agree.”
“Okay,” Riku nods, then returns to Sion’s neck. Sion feels his lips curving against it. “I’m glad you know.”
(A year from now, Sion wonders if this would be as unfathomable to him as it is today. He sort of wants to pinch himself to verify he’s awake except he’s actively pretending he’s still sleeping.
Cute, was Sion’s first aware thought, waking up to the feeling of a blunt fingernail tracing his cheek, the line of his jaw, moving on to sweep the brush of his lashes before grazing his bottom lip. Riku smells a bit like me this morning as the second, when Riku snuggled against him carefully, afraid to wake him, resting his head against Sion’s chest before being embarrassed and pulling away. Third: His ass looks incredible in my underwear, when he opens his eyes and sees Riku with his back turned on him, deceptively immobile, acting like he’d also been sleeping.
Sion observes him. Riku’s hair is a mess. It looks like a flock of birds flew in and had a fight in it. There are bruises on his hips and waist, marked by Sion, joining the hickeys on his throat, and Sion’s piss-poor cleaning skills means that white streak on his skin’s probably last night’s leftovers. It’s deplorable by Riku’s standards, he’d definitely freak when he finally notices how filthy they both are, but Sion can’t find it in him to feel remorse.
He did that. With Riku. Because they’re dating now. They’re official.
Sion moves toward him, nuzzling against Riku’s neck, planting two soft kisses on the moles there. Smiles when Riku groans.
“...Can you let some of them go?”
Sion laughs. On the spot, he comes up with a new fantasy, less porn-y, more like the movies Riku likes falling asleep to: making Riku’s life so cheesy and intolerable Riku’s going to miss when his biggest problem was walking in on Sion.)