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Shen Jiu, only very recently given the name Shen Qingqiu, was standing by the back wall of one of Huan Hua Palace's ostentatious rooms. Music drifted through a crowd of gathered disciples and their masters from various sects, each flitting here and there, drinking wine as the moon rose. Shen Qingqiu huffed. This was one of the huge banquets Huan Hua Palace always threw after a discussion conference and he hated it.
Of course, it wasn't as bad as when Cang Qiong Mountain hosted. On those days Shen Qingqiu would spend the entire time putting out fires left and right. He would run himself into a state of never ending exhaustion only to have to entertain every random cultivator from another sect who stopped by to see the Qing Jing Peak Lord. Of course, said Qing Jing Peak Lord was barely ever free and so Shen Qingqiu, as the named successor would end up making tea and playing guqin or reciting poetry on command as if he were a trained dog.
But even with all that, having to come to Huan Hua Palace was a close second in terms of how much he wanted to throw himself out a window. He swore if that Old Palace Master tried to talk to him one more time he was going to do something he'd regret. Disgusting old man.
Shen Qingqiu was sure it would be easier if he was drunk like most of the other attendees. It was probably only Shen Qingqiu and the scattering of ascetics who attended who were not already enjoying the intoxicating ease brought on by the constant flow of wine. But Shen Qingqiu did not drink. How could he? He could barely sleep on a good day without being worried at every unexpected sound. Drinking would dull all his senses, lower his inhibitions and make him an easy target. He would be liable to be attacked or do something incredibly embarrassing that he would regret for the rest of his days.
He really didn't know which was worse.
Tonight, there was one saving grace. He'd found a jar of what appeared to be some mix of plum juice. Plums were his favorite and to find something that didn't contain alcohol was even more fortunate. The jar had been tucked in the back of a collection of other wine jars, but it had been unlabeled, smaller than the rest and barely visible. He'd taken a sip to taste and when there was no alcohol burn, he'd happily stolen the whole jar. Everyone else was apparently fine with drinking, so he didn't see why it should be a problem for him to take the only thing he could actually consume.
He let his weight lean back against the wall as a new musician took over. A girl from Tian Yi Overlook, based on her robes. She settled into a chair with her erhu in her lap as Shen Qingqiu took another sip from his jar. The girl was… pretty good actually. She made a few mistakes right at the start but once she worked out the rhythm, the music wrapped around Shen Qingqiu like the cool spring breeze from outside. He thought maybe he was actually enjoying himself.
Just a little.
He took another sip, eyes drifting shut as he breathed in the scent of peony and camellia. His body shifted, swaying in time with the slow melodic rhythm. Yes. He thought this was actually very nice. Maybe the girl would play another song afterwards. That would be very fortunate. He didn't think he'd enjoyed a performance this much from anyone other than the jiejies at the Warm Red Pavilion.
A lightness stole through his chest as he took another drink. Meifen-jie and Liao-jie would probably like this. He hadn't seen them in a while. It was harder now that he was successor. But he should go visit when he could. He'd gathered an assortment of snacks to bring from the city outside Huan Hua Palace for the next time he could manage to sneak away. His lips tilted up as he thought of how much they'd probably enjoy them. They'd tease him for his absence but that wasn't so bad. It was nice to feel like people missed his presence.
The music faded out and he opened his eyes. He shivered, blinking as he forced himself to focus. The lantern light cast everything in a soft haze and he lifted the jar to take another sip. He frowned, staring down at its empty depths then tipped it upside down as if he was expecting something to come out.
Nothing.
That had been the only jar. Now what was he supposed to—
"Shen Qingqiu."
He paused then spun on the ball of his foot. The room tilted on its axis, rippling then settled again. It was Liu Qingge. There was something shivering through his thoughts. Something he had wanted to say. He considered, lips pursing as he tried to reach for the thought.
Oh yes! That was it.
A flicker of annoyance rushed through him and before he knew it he was rushing over to stand toe to toe with his arrogant shidi. Liu Qingge flinched backward, swaying on his feet. Good. Shen Qingqiu pushed him and Liu Qingge lost his balance tumbling into an open chair.
"You!" Liu Qingge bit out but Shen Qingqiu didn't want to hear it.
"Hush! I'm trying to speak to you," Shen Qingqiu said. Liu Qingge made a face like he bit into something sour.
"Shen Qing—" Liu Qingge started to push himself to his feet and Shen Qingqiu felt even more annoyed. It was unpleasant and he didn't like it. He pushed Liu Qingge back down. Liu Qingge made a shocked noise, face going red, and tried to stand again. Shen Qingqiu pushed him back down. Liu Qingge, again, tried to stand.
Shen Qingqiu really didn't like this! Why couldn't his shidi cooperate? Fine then. He gripped Liu Qingge's shoulders then plopped himself in Liu Qingge's lap. There. Now he couldn't move without moving Shen Qingqiu, too.
Liu Qingge sputtered, his flush spreading all the way to his ears. Shen Qingqiu watched him open his mouth to no doubt complain. That wouldn't do. He put his finger against Liu Qingge's surprisingly soft lips and shushed him.
Liu Qingge froze.
"Shidi, I'm trying to speak to you," Shen Qingqiu pouted. "So be quiet for your shixiong, ok?"
Liu Qingge might as well have turned to stone. Shen Qingqiu nodded, satisfied.
"Good." Shen Qingqiu slid his arms around Liu Qingge's shoulders. "Now, Shidi should apologize."
Liu Qingge's whole face twitched. "For what?"
Shen Qingqiu rolled his eyes. His vision swam, spinning in a rush of bright colors and hazy shapes. He started to tip backwards, no longer certain where the floor was. A laugh bubbled out of his chest as his weight slipped further and his stomach swooped. Liu Qingge jolted, hands wrapping around Shen Qingqiu's waist. They were so warm. The heat seeped through his robes in a way that made Shen Qingqiu shiver.
"Thank you," Shen Qingqiu sniffed. He paused, trying to remember…. Oh, yes. "Shidi should still apologize. Do you know, you would have a big hole in your pretty head if I hadn't taken care of that ghost at the well. And you just stormed off!"
Liu Qingge didn't respond, staring up at Shen Qingqiu like he had never seen him before.
"Really Liu-shidi, you won't give me any face and won't even call me shixiong," Shen Qingqiu pouted. "What am I supposed to do?"
"I—" Liu Qingge said. "What—"
Shen Qingqiu rolled his eyes, Liu Qingge's hands tightening on his waist as he began to sway again. It made Shen Qingqiu want to laugh. Liu Qingge was so arrogant, running around scowling all the time and marring that too-lovely face. But really? Could this little spoiled shidi of his even form a sentence? He leaned in until they were almost nose to nose, then repeated slowly.
"I said I kept your pretty head pristine and unharmed."
"You were attacking the ghost," Liu Qingge said.
"Mmhmm."
"Not me."
"So you aren't a complete idiot."
"Shen Qing—"
Shen Qingqiu whipped his hands up to cover Liu Qingge's mouth. "Shhhhhh. Thats not right. You're supposed to say shixiong. Ok?"
Somehow Liu Qingge's face managed to flush even more. His long lashes fluttering as he stared wide-eyed up at Shen Qingqiu. He looked so silly! Truly red as the camellia blossoms outside. Another laugh bubbled out of Shen Qingqiu, his chest light as air. Liu Qingge took the opportunity to pry Shen Qingqiu's hands away but Shen Qingqiu just tsked, slipping back under Liu Qingge's fingers to put them back in place.
"Nooooo," Shen Qingqiu pouted. "Call me shixiong. Shixiong."
Liu Qingge swallowed hard, stilling. After a moment Shen Qingqiu felt his jaw tense, then he nodded.
Shen Qingqiu pulled his hand away just a little, in case it was a trick.
Liu Qingge's eyes darted away, then he mumbled, "Shen-shixiong."
A flooding warmth filled his chest and Shen Qingqiu smiled, patting Liu Qingge's cheek. It was really nice to be acknowledged properly. And even better someone had finally taught this arrogant brute some manners!
Now what else could he—
A commotion nearby drew his attention. He whipped around, stopped only from falling by Liu Qingge's hands tightening on his waist. It was Qi Qingqi. She had her finger raised and was pointing in some boy's face. A Huan Hua palace disciple if the gold robes were anything to go by. He watched her gesture to a group of her shimei nearby and Shen Qingqiu nodded. He understood.
He'd always quite admired the way Qi Qingqi could be so ruthless when it came to protecting her fellow disciples. She could be sharp but she was never needlessly rude the way Liu Qingge was. He paused. Well, never except to him.
The thought settled uncomfortably and he shook it away. He didn't like it and with the strains of music and laughter floating around him, and with Liu Qingge's hands still holding him steady, he couldn't quite remember why it mattered. All that remained as the thought slid away was a curling impulse. He wiggled his way off Liu Qingge's lap, ignoring the surprised noise Liu Qingge made as Shen Qingqiu finally got to his feet, arms thrust out to the side to keep his balance.
"Wait," Liu Qingge said, "She— Shixiong, there's something wrong with you."
Liu Qingge made a grab for him but Shen Qingqiu spun out of the way, ducking under one of Liu Qingge's hands, then leaping back lightly. He waved Liu Qingge off. There was nothing wrong with him! He felt fine. Great even! Besides he had other things to do.
"Don't worry so much Shidi," Shen Qingqiu said as he ducked back into Liu Qingge's space. "You look flushed—you should rest." He grasped both of Liu Qingge's cheeks then bent to press his lips just below the little mole on his cheek. Then darted away before Liu Qingge could react, a laugh slipping from his lips.
As Shen Qingqiu disappeared into the crowd in a flurry of delicate green robes, Liu Qingge stared after him. His heart was fluttering and his cheeks were hot. He couldn't get himself to move a single muscle. The image of Shen Qingqiu's delicate laugh and the way his eyes had flashed with mischief kept circling through his mind.
Liu Qingge dropped his head into his hands and groaned. He wanted to throw himself into the pond outside. Maybe then he wouldn't feel like he was about to sweat through his robes.
…
Shen Qingqiu slipped forward on light feet behind Qi Qingqi.
"Qi-shimei," he called just behind her ear. She jolted and whipped around.
"You— What are you doing skulking around like that?"
Shen Qingqiu pulled his fan from his sleeve, fluttering it in front of his face to hide his growing smirk. He felt even lighter than earlier. His stomach swooped like it had when he first learned qinggong and found himself leaping into the air like a bird.
"Who's skulking, shimei?" He drifted forward again, throwing an arm around her shoulder as the room tipped in a dizzying spill of color around him. "Shimei, shimei, I really love watching you reprimand anyone in your path. So vicious!" He paused, humming as her face contorted into a disgusted scowl. It was so funny and he had to swallow down laughter, putting on a very serious expression of his own. "But actually, you could be even more vicious. Some of these men," he tsked. "Shameless."
Qi Qingqi's jaw tightened. "You! Shameless? What are you doing right now?"
Shen Qingqiu blinked, frowning. "What? How am I shameless? Shimei, isn't it natural for your shixiong to see your hard work and offer you a compliment?"
Qi Qingqi stared, her face flushing a bright scarlet, then she shoved him off. Shen Qingqiu stumbled back. Everything whirled around him as he did a spin on the ball of his foot to catch his balance. A bubble of laughter burst out of him and he raised his fan to try to hide his grin. He was trying to be very serious and give a compliment! He really had to pull himself together.
He thought he should be upset that she was angry with him, that he should care more that she'd assumed he was— What? What had she assumed?
"Shimei—"
"You're flirting so openly!" Qi Qingqi spat. "Is that not shameless? Just because you think you can go around sleeping with whoever you want—"
She cut herself off as Shen Qingqiu really started to laugh. How silly! Truly! Him? Sleeping around? Something snaked through the back of his mind but it wouldn't stick. He tried to swallow down the laughter but it slipped out of him again, making his chest feel fluttery and his head hazy.
"What is so funny?" Qi Qingqi demanded. He couldn't tell whether she looked mad or horrified.
"Who is flirting?"
"You."
Shen Qingqiu pointed at himself, then waved his fan tipping his head to the side. "Me? Shimei, please don't take offense to this." He leaned in, swaying on his feet as he got close enough to whisper. "You're not really my type."
She arched a brow, unimpressed as he scooted closer, pressing his weight against her shoulder and smiling up into her scowling face. His Qi-shimei was so ornery all the time, with a biting wit and certainly more than one knife hidden on her person. He hadn't expected her to say something that made so little sense.
"Doesn't shimei know?" Shen Qingqiu huffed. "This shixiong only likes men."
Qi Qingqi's whole face froze, her lips parted. Then she jolted back.
"What?!!"
"So loud," Shen Qingqiu pouted, rubbing his temple.
"Why are you always at the brothel then?" Qi Qingqi jerked him forward by his collar.
"To see my jies, of course," Shen Qingqiu grumbled. Why was she so mad? He didn't like it.
"Your— Your jies?!"
"Mmhmm," Shen Qingqiu said, "Everyone has the wrong impression! But they taught me all my music, and let me sleep there when I was a still in the disciple dorms before I was named successor. They didnt even make me pay when they heard I couldn't sleep in the same room with the other disciples."
The memory made his gut twist. He really didn't like it, being surrounded by so many other boys. Some of them who would look at him with the same disdain that Qiu Jianl—
He shook his head. He didn't want to think about that. He was having a good time and those thoughts only ruined his mood.
Qi Qingqi ran a hand down her face. She grumbled then steeled herself.
"Shen Qingqiu, are you drunk right now?"
"What?" Shen Qingqiu shook his head, the lights casting shimmering after images across his vision. It was pretty and he felt his discomfort slip away.
"Shen Qingqiu!" Qi Qingqi snapped her fingers in front of his face.
"What? Oh. No, I don't drink. I don't ever drink. I'm fine."
"You are certainly not fine."
"I only drank the fruit juice that was on the table over there," Shen Qingqiu pouted. He didn't understand why she was making such a big deal over nothing. He had been having fun but he wasn't having fun anymore. That was fine; he would find something else to do and then he wouldn't keep feeling uncomfortable.
"Shixiong!" Qi Qingqi pulled him back around to look at her. "I don't think that was just juice. We should have Mu Qingfang look at you."
"Noooo," Shen Qingqiu shook his head. "No, I'm fine."
Qi Qingqi squeezed her eyes shut and took a deep breath. She turned him around again and pushed him forward, maneuvering him down until he was sitting in a chair.
"Listen to me. stay here and don't move. I'm going to find Mu Qingfang."
"I don't—"
"Shut your mouth. For once, can you please just listen and not argue?"
"Fine." Shen Qingqiu crossed his arms.
Qi Qingqi sighed, then darted away through the crowd. She knew she'd have to find Mu Qingfang fast. She had no illusions as to how long Shen Qingqiu would actually sit still. He loved being a contrarian on a good day, let alone, well, whatever this was. As she glanced through the gathered groups of people, she couldn't help but wonder; had what Shen Qingqiu said been true? Because if it had, the things she'd assumed about him…
Had she been wrong?
She shook her head. She would focus on the task at hand and then wonder about what Shen Qingqiu did or didn't do later.
…
Shen Qingqiu waited until he was sure Qi Qingqi was gone and then he got to his feet and slid back down the hall in the opposite direction. The breeze from the open garden doors ruffled his hair and he tilted his head back to look at the full moon. He twirled around a group of people passing by, dodging someone who made eye contact and started to say his name.
He didn't want to make small talk with some stranger. He wanted to enjoy the evening. He'd find that table of sweets he'd seen earlier, too embarrassed at the time to eat anything. He frowned as he slowed his steps. Why had he been embarrassed? He loved sweets. He'd eat only sweets if he could.
Well, no matter. He'd find them now and then he could have as much as he wanted.
He turned a corner into one of the large rooms and walked right into a wall. He blinked. That didn't make any sense. Stumbling his way backwards, he looked up then smiled.
"Wei-shidi," He went to raise his fan then realized his hands were empty. Turning in a circle revealed no missing fan. He'd just had it, so where—
"Shen-shixiong," Wei Qingwei looked down at him. "Are you alright? You look a little…"
Shen Qingqiu tilted his head then swayed to the side as the whole room tipped with him. Wei Qingwei's hand darted out to steady him, settling on his waist.
"Ah, Wei-shidi." Shen Qingqiu shivered, the heat of Wei Qingwei's hand seepeing through his robes. "You're hands are so warm. It's nice."
"Are you drunk?" Wei Qingwei looked like he couldn't quite believe it himself.
"Nooo," Shen Qingqiu pursed his lips. "Qi-shimei asked me the same thing. I only drank some fruit juice."
Wei Qingwei hummed. "I see. Maybe we should find Mu Qingfang then?"
"I'm fine." Shen Qingqiu shook his head from side to side, the motion sending stars shimmering across his vision. He tried to pull back and stumbled over his feet, falling against Wei Qingwei. "Why does everyone keep saying the same thing. No one is ever concerned about me, so why now?"
"Ah, shixiong," Wei Qingwei started, then trailed off.
Shen Qingqiu huffed and punched him lightly in the arm. Something trembled through his chest, uncomfortable only for a moment before the lightness stole back in. He felt like maybe he was supposed to be upset, but he couldn't remember why. The lights were soft, there were strains of music echoing from close by and a floral scented breeze drifting from outside. He felt like he might float away if it weren't for Wei Qingwei's warm hands still on his waist. What was there to be upset about? A laugh spilled from his lips, the world spinning in dizzying golden light from the lanterns.
As the worry slipped from him, something else curled close to take it's place, pushing words to the front of his mind.
"We really should look for—" Wei Qingqwei started.
"Wei-shidi, I have a secret." Shen Qingqiu interrupted. Wei Qingwei's mouth snapped close and Shen Qingqiu's lips curled up. "You know, this shixiong is very impressed by your skill and craftsmanship."
"Wait," Wei Qingwei cocked a brow, his concern morphing into confusion. "You are?"
"Yes, yes," Shen Qingqiu nodded. "When I first met you I thought, this gigantic man couldn't have the skill to make an immortal cultivator's weapon."
Wei Qingwei frowned but it was only the truth. When Shen Qingqiu had been introduced to the disciples from Wan Jian Peak, Wei Qingwei had towered over the rest of his martial siblings, broad-shouldered, muscles defined even under his disciple robes. Shen Qingqiu wondered how someone like that could work on the delicate inlaid designs and engravings that were customary on spiritual weapons.
"Shh shh," Shen Qingqiu hushed Wei Qingwei before he could speak, raising his hand to place his finger against Wei Qingwei's lips. "I'm not done, so don't speak. Shidi is extremely talented and I misjudged you. There is no better weaponsmith in the jianghu. That is a known fact."
Wei Qingwei's lips parted, a soft flush blooming on his cheeks. "Shen-shixiong, you'll have to forgive me for not believing you but, you always seem so unhappy when you look at my work."
Shen Qingqiu rolled his eyes. Wei Qingwei, too? Why were all his shidi and shimei so silly? Didn't they know anything?
"That's because its unbecoming for a scholar to be so effusive with their feelings. Don't you know that?" Shen Qingqiu sniffed. "I'm a refined master."
"I did not know that." Wei Qingwei's frown wobbled, then his lips quirked up.
"So silly, Wei-shidi," Shen Qingqiu said. "Shixiong clearly has been remiss in not teaching you certain things. You have been spending to much time with your swords." He tipped his head, humming. It was unbecoming for certain, but it was just him and Wei Qingwei in earshot. He could probably be a little more open. He went onto his toes to whisper into Wei Qingwei's ear, just in case. "I actually quite admire your knives, I've wanted to ask you for one for ages and ages, but I thought you'd say no."
Shen Qingqiu felt the rumble of Wei Qingwei's laugh, pressed against his chest. Shen Qingqiu huffed, tipping his head back to shoot a pout at his shidi.
"Why are you laughing at me?"
"A knife? Really? What kind of weapon is that for a scholar?"
Shen Qingqiu huffed and dropped his head onto Wei Qingwei's shoulder. Wei Qingwei was so warm. It was nice to just let all of his weight lean against his shidi's broad chest.
"It's not," he grumbled. "I'm a scholar and a cultivator. Shouldn't I get to use a knife too? The one you made for Qi-shimei, that fit into her xiao-guan. I was so envious! It was really very beautiful. The work of a true master."
"If shixiong wants something like that, I'll make it for him," Wei Qingqwei laughed.
Shen Qingqiu's bounced back onto his toes, a rush of giddy excitement lighting him up. It was the kind he usually forced back down, but he could barely remember why that mattered. All he could think about was that his shidi had offered him something he'd wanted for some time.
"Really?" Shen Qingqiu smiled. "Then this shixiong will certainly accept."
Wei Qingwei stared, his mouth falling open and his ears turning red.
"Ah, Shen-shixiong…"
Shen Qingqiu hummed. He was about to ask what that expression was for when he heard someone call his name. He wrapped his hands in Wei Qingwei's robes then tipped his head upside down. The room flipped, lights going hazy and the floor and ceiling blurring together. He suppressed a laugh, watching as Liu Qingge and Qi Qingqi turned the corner and spotted him.
He pulled himself back up, going onto his toes to pat Wei Qingwei on the cheek, then darted off. He didn't want to be forced to sit down. He wanted to enjoy the night. Everything was so nice. It was the most he'd ever enjoyed a party and he wasn't going to let his overly concerned shidi and shimei force him to stop. Why everyone was worried enough to chase him around? No one was ever worried about him. He—
He didn't like that thought. It sent a sick twist through his gut. He shook it off, quickly turning another corner then bounding down the hall on light feet before slipping through another door. There. It'd take them awhile to find him now and he could go do something fun instead. Nothing to worry about at all. Everything was fine.
Wei Qingwei stared down the hall where Shen Qingqiu had made his quick exit, laughing the entire time. He didn't think he'd ever seen Shen Qingqiu laugh. He didn't think he'd ever seen Shen Qingqiu smile either. Not like that, his face softening and his long lashes fluttering. He was shocked to find that Shen Qingqiu, his cold as ice shixiong, was really quite pretty.
Wei Qingwei swallowed as his cheeks heated up. It was probably just the shock. He hadn't expected Shen Qingqiu to say he liked his work. Shen Qingqiu was happy with Xiu Ya of course. Wei Qingwei had never doubted that. But he thought it had been a fluke. Shen Qingqiu was so standoffish, looking down his nose at everybody and everything. To think he'd actually been admiring Wei Qingwei's work this whole time, that he was just too shy to admit it. What a thought.
His most hard to please Shixiong liked his work so much he wished to ask Wei Qingwei to make him something. Shen Qingqiu was really so… He was…
Wei Qingwei was saved from having to finish that thought as Liu Qingge and Qi Qingqi reached him.
"Why didn't you stop him?" Qi Qingqi crossed her arms. "There's clearly something wrong with him."
"Shixiong needs to be brought to Mu-shidi," Liu Qingge agreed.
"Since when are you calling him shixiong?" Wei Qingwei cocked a brow.
"He asked me to." Liu Qingge's lips turned down and his gaze cut away. Wei Qingqwei sighed. It seemed no one was quite prepared for the effect of a heavily intoxicated Shen Qingqiu.
…
Shen Qingqiu strolled through group of people surrounding a young disciple in blue robes playing the pipa. It was a nice enough sound, the song not overly complicated, but Shen Qingqiu could play something better. And there were so many of his fellow Qing Jing Peak disciples who he could say the same about. This disciple's master should be more strict!
He wondered if he should figure out who that was and tell them so, but as his eyes tracked around the room, he caught sight of a familiar figure. Shen Qingqiu slipped back through the crowd, walking along the side of the room so he wouldn't be seen before dipping into an alcove and quieting his steps. A rush of giddy excitement fluttered through his chest as he slid behind the shorter man. He reached out then before the man could notice him, tugged on his ribbon.
The man jolted, but Shen Qingqiu threw his arms around the man's narrow shoulders to keep him still then pressed close to whisper in his ear.
"Shang-shidi, are you enjoying the party?"
Shang Qinghua froze, turning stiff as a board. "Shen Qi— Shen-shixiong?"
"Mmhmm, you should be more aware of your surroundings."
Shang Qinghua let out a high tittering laugh. It made Shen Qingqiu want to tease his flighty little shidi more and he had to suppress his own laugh. Shang Qinghua was always acting like such a scared little mouse, flitting nervously this way and that. But, Shen Qingqiu thought Shang Qinghua was probably smarter than anyone gave him credit for.
His thoughts traced back to a certain mission his shidi had returned from, somehow unscathed unlike the other An Ding Peak disciples.
Shen Qingqiu thought Shang Qinghua was dangerously clever, in fact
"Shidi," Shen Qingqiu hummed. "This shixiong has a question for you."
"Oh?" Shang Qinghua's shoulders trembled as another high laugh escaped his lips. "What is that?"
Shen Qingqiu tugged on Shang Qinghua's ribbon again, grinning at the way it made his shidi jolt. How fun! He let his weight settle against Shang Qinghua's shoulders, pressing them together, chest to back.
"Shidi is always darting here and there, quivering like the tiniest mouse. Our martial siblings all tease you and think you're only good to do menial work. But Shixiong thinks that you know more than you let on," Shen Qingqiu said.
"I-I dont—"
"Shhhh, Shixiong is very impressed by your skill, so don't interrupt."
"You—" Shang Qinghua tried to turn around but Shen Qingqiu just tightened his grip. "You are?"
"Mmm, all these rich lords of martial siblings we have. They don't see you skimming off the top or sending messages to who knows where. But I do."
Ever since that mission where Shang Qinghua had been the sole survivor, Shen Qingqiu had paid extra close attention to him. Shen Qingqiu knew more than anyone how to craft the perfect response, to shift his tone or his face to look trustworthy. How could he not see it in someone else?
He sighed. The slithering twisting in his gut was back, but he couldn't stop the words if he tried.
"You should be careful shidi. This shixiong would be a little sad if something were to happen to you."
"You would?" Shang Qinghua tried to turn again and Shen Qingqiu flicked him in the temple.
"Ow— Hey!"
Shen Qingqiu ignored his shidi's yelp, sliding around to the front before settling his arms back around his Shang Qinghua's shoulders.
"What's wrong with you?" Shen Qingqiu pouted. He didn't like how the lightness in his body had faded away, leaving a sickly weight in his gut. But he couldn't help but carry on, driven on by some need to say what he'd been thinking for some time. He leaned more of his weight onto Shang Qinghua, tilting his head to meet his shidi's eyes. "Use those skills to protect the sect, ok? Otherwise this shixiong might have to kill you."
He didn't like it, didn't want to think about it those kinds of things. But now that the words were out, he felt a little better.
Shang Qinghua gaped at him. He looked distinctly like a fish and that made the worry slide from Shen Qingqiu's shoulders. He smiled leaning up to press a quick kiss to Shang Qinghua's cheek. Then he slipped away again, stumbling backwards as the room spun around him.
What a great evening! He was having fun and solving problems all in one go. He didn't notice Shang Qinghua still staring after him as he bounded away to go find something else to occupy his time.
It wasn't long before Wei Qingwei, Qi Qingqi, and Liu Qingge stopped in front of Shang Qinghua, still staring at the empty spot where Shen Qingqiu had been. His cheek was still tingling from where Shen Qingqiu had kissed him. Shen Qingqiu! Had kissed him! He couldn't even begin to think about the other things his generally ice-cold shixiong had said.
Qi Qingqi ducked her head to look him in the eye. "So you saw Shen-shixiong then." It wasn't a question.
Shang Qinghua nodded.
"What'd he say to you?"
"Uhhh," Shang Qinghua scratched his nose. "Let's not discuss it. There's—"
"Something wrong with him." Liu Qingge crossed his arms.
Shang Qinghua nodded again. "We should—"
"Catch him before he does anything else," Wei Qingqwei sighed.
Again, Shang Qinghua nodded. He really wondered how he'd ended up in this mess.
…
Shen Qingqiu slid through the crowd, humming softly to the sound of someone close by playing the guqin. He was very pleased. So many of his martial siblings had seen him and hadn't snubbed him at all! Not like they usually would. They had been surprised, certainly, but they hadn't turned him away or spoken to him with thinly veiled contempt. It made him very happy. He didn't remember the last time he had been so happy.
He had always dreamed of this as he lay on his hard mat in the Qiu house, trying to sleep despite the bruising and the pain. He'd think Qi-ge would come back and take him away to some sect. Then he would have martial siblings just like in all the stories. They'd train together, and eat together, and he'd finally have people who cared about him.
Maybe it would be like having a family.
His thoughts twisted together. It had never been like that though, had it? His martial siblings didn't care about him. They had disliked him from the moment they met—
No. That was unpleasant. He didn't want to think about it. He wanted to stay in the soft haze of the evening, enjoying the music and the attention of his shidi and shimei. Some things were best forgotten.
Besides, what was there to be upset about? He'd seen Feng Qinglun from Ku Xing Peak.1 Of course his ascetic shidi had not been drinking, but he'd taken one look at Shen Qingqiu and sat him down, offering him a cup of light green tea. Feng Qinglun had always been a little severe so Shen Qingqiu had found it quite funny to be fussed over, his shidi frowning down at him and helping him straighten his robes and insisting he drink the rest of the tea before moving.
But then he'd started saying how Shen Qingqiu really didn't look well and that maybe they should find Mu Qingfang. Shen Qingqiu didn't like that so he slipped away when Feng Qinglun went to refill his cup.
Bai Qingsheng, from Ling Yu Peak,2 had been tuning her guqin when he found her. She had looked at him like he'd been replaced with one of Wei Qingwei's pangolins then told him he needed to eat something. He'd waved her off until she produced a few osmanthus cakes. He could never resist a sweet and before he'd known it they were all gone and he was pouting down at his empty hands. She had laughed, eyes wide and disbelieving and he felt his mood lift even if he no longer had any osmanthus cakes.
He'd wanted to speak to her more about music. He never could manage to ask her to trade notes, even if she was the successor to the music peak and he loved playing guqin more than anything. But he'd caught sight of Wei Qingwei's giant form coming his way and he had to make a quick exit. He knew that Wei Qingwei would only force him to sit down and be examined by Mu Qingfang when there was nothing wrong with him!
How could anything be wrong with him when he was so happy?
Meng Qingtian, from Shou Ling Peak3 had bumped into him at just the right time. He'd been getting a little chilly and his head was spinning. It wasn't bad, it made the world feel light and full of brilliant color. But he didn't exactly like being cold. He dressed in so many layers to avoid that, so he didn't understand why there was a chill seeping through his bones. Meng Qingtian had pulled off his furry outer robe and draped it over Shen Qingqiu's shoulders as soon as the word cold had left Shen Qingqiu's lips. He could hardly believe it!
He paused, looking down at himself. He still had the robe on, in fact. He must have forgotten to give it back when Meng Qingtian had left him to go find Mu Qingfang. He had darted away before Meng Qingtian had made it back but it didn't matter. He still felt nice, as if everything was soft around him, his body barely pulled to the earth.
Through the haze of glowing lantern light he made out the most familiar figure of all. The night really couldn't be better now. He felt as if he were floating as he drifted across the room on light feet, pushing past a group of people to throw his arms around Yue Qingyuan's neck.
Yue Qingyuan startled, but his hands immediately wrapped around Shen Qingqiu's back to steady him.
"Qingqiu-shidi?"
"Qi-ge," Shen Qingqiu whined. "Qi-ge! Where have you been? Why aren't you paying attention to me?"
Yue Qingyuan's mouth hung open and he flushed up to the tips of his ears, eyes darting around to the group of people he'd been talking to. Shen Qingqiu couldn't find it in him to care even a little. Yue Qingyuan was so warm and Shen Qingqiu pressed his face against his Qi-ge's chest, rubbing his cheek back and forth across the soft fabric.
"Qi-ge grew up to be so big," Shen Qingqiu huffed. "How'd that happen? Why didn't that happen to me?"
"Ah," Yue Qingyuan winced, lifting his head to look at the group he'd been talking to. "Please excuse me. It seems my shidi is unwell."
If there were any responses, Shen Qingqiu barely noticed them. Yue Qingyuan guided them away too quickly for Shen Qingqiu to process, and soon enough they were stepping out onto the raised garden porch. The breeze was nice, filled with the scent of flowers and the sound of running water nearby. It was a perfect night, made even better with his face pressed against Yue Qingyuan's chest.
Yue Qingyuan's hands curled around Shen Qingqiu's shoulders and tried to tug him away but Shen Qingqiu whined and tightened his grip.
"Qi-ge why do you always pay attention to me when I dont want you to, but ignore me when I do?"
"Shidi," Yue Qingyuan sighed. "You are unwell. Let me look at you."
"Nooo," Shen Qingqiu shook his head. "I feel fine! Better than fine!" He was enjoying the night air and was finally feeling warm again and now Yue Qingyuan was being difficult. It wasn't fair.
"Alright, alright," Yue Qingyuan said. "Let's just sit for awhile, then."
Shen Qingqiu let him maneuver them to the side of the porch. He sat down and Shen Qingqiu slid into his lap right afterwards. This was almost nicer. With his head tucked against Yue Qingyuan's neck and his legs curled up, he was more comfortable than he'd been all evening. Under the soft moonlight and with the sounds of music and laughter drifting from inside, he thought that there wasn't a single better way he'd rather spend his time. He hadn't sat like this with Yue Qingyuan since they were children. Why didn't they do this anymore? Why couldn't they sit together and just enjoy the night like they used to?
It made a shivery feeling thread through his thoughts, both pleasant and unpleasant.
"I miss you, Qi-ge," he mumbled against Yue Qingyuan's neck.
Yue Qingyuan stiffened. After a few moments he took a deep breath then raised his hand to rub across the curve of Shen Qingqiu's back over Meng Qingtian's furry robe.
"I'm right here," he said against the crown of Shen Qingqiu's head. "How could you miss me?"
"But you never feel like you're here," Shen Qingqiu said. "You're always so far away." A feeling simmered under his skin, but it never quite reached his thoughts. His mind was too light to hold it. He thought maybe he should be upset. That he should cry or yell, but he couldn't remember why.
"I know it's better for you here," he mumbled, the words unearthed from somewhere, slipping from his lips before he could think about them. "This Xiao-Jiu knows that Qi-ge deserved a better life. And I'm not— I just—
That feeling crept back, pressing up just beneath the surface. He didn't like it. It was too vast, too hard to hold. It threatened to pull him under into some deep cavernous place that he didn't want to go. The evening had been perfect. He'd been happy. It was better not to remember certain things, wasn't it? To just enjoy the night and Yue Qingyuan's presence.
Everyone had been so nice to him, so concerned. He wasn't worried anymore. He wasn't scared. He just—
"Xiao-Jiu?" Yue Qingyuan asked. He sounded worried. Shen Qingqiu didn't like that. He didn't want to think about it, but the words came out anyway.
"I just— I waited for you and I—"
He burrowed his head into Yue Qingyuan's shoulder and shook his head. If he didn't want to think about it, he wouldn't. Instead he breathed in Yue Qingyuan's familiar scent and let it all drift away into the quiet haze of the night.
"I don't like it. Qi-ge. Tell me something nice instead."
Yue Qingyuan ran a hand down the long fall of Shen Qingqiu's hair. He was quiet for some time before pressing his face against the top of Shen Qingqiu's head.
"I miss you, too."
Shen Qingqiu hummed, heart fluttering and warmth curling back through his thoughts.
"Mmm, that's nicer. Tell me more things."
"Alright," Yue Qingyuan hummed. "I like watching you play guqin. Xiao-Jiu has become such an accomplished musician."
"You should," Shen Qingqiu huffed. "I'm really good."
"You are," Yue Qingyuan agreed. "And I have one of your paintings hanging in my house."
"I never gave you a painting," Shen Qingqiu frowned. He'd have remembered that. He hadn't even known Yue Qingyuan liked his paintings.
"I know." Shen Qingqiu couldn't see his face, but Yue Qingyuan sounded embarrassed. "I bought it from someone. I knew you'd never give me one."
Shen Qingqiu's face flushed. "I would have if you asked. Dumb Qi-ge."
"You what?" Yue Qingyuan's hand paused from running through Shen Qingqiu's hair.
"You never say anything," Shen Qingqiu grumbled. His heart was fluttering and his cheeks felt hot. "How am I supposed to know what you want? Dumb, stupid, Qi-ge."
Yue Qingyuan let out a soft laugh. He sounded too pleased and Shen Qingqiu poked him in the side, relishing in the way Yue Qingyuan cut off on an "oof."
"This Qi-ge apologizes," Yue Qingyuan said. "He was wrong."
"You were. Aren't you the sect leader? Use your words."
"Xiao-Jiu is right, as always. Qi-ge apologizes."
"You're always sorry," Shen Qingqiu said. "Sorry this, sorry that." He leaned back to point a finger in Yue Qingyuan's face. "Don't you know anything? As useless as ever. When you're sorry you have to say why. When you want something, you have to say. Everyone knows this."
Yue Qingyuan's face turned pink and he ducked his head as he smiled.
"I see," he said. "But Xiao-Jiu doesn't do that."
Shen Qingqiu's mouth fell open. What was this man even saying! He swatted at Yue Qingyuan chest then huffed, "Why are you being rude! We weren't talking about me, we were talking about you."
Yue Qingyuan's smile curled up further. "Xiao-Jiu is right, of course. Qi-ge was wrong."
"Good, good," Shen Qingqiu sniffed. "Now try again."
"Mmmm," Yue Qingyuan hummed. "Will Xiao-Jiu give me one of his paintings?"
Shen Qingqiu tipped his head first one way then the other. He was warm to the tips of his toes, head light. Yue Qingyuan looked so eager, so hopeful, just like a little puppy. It made Shen Qingqiu want to tease him.
"I won't," he said.
Yue Qingyuan's smile wobbled, expression falling like Shen Qingqiu had just sent him out to sleep in the rain. He really was so foolish! Shen Qingqiu could hardly believe this man, his Qi-ge was one of the most powerful people in the jianghu.
This pitiful expression... Wasn't it really so cute?
He flicked Yue Qingyuan's nose then smirked. "This Xiao-Jiu will grace you with a brand new painting, just for Qi-ge."
"Xiao-jiu is so generous." Yue Qingyuan's smile curled back into place as his eyes went glassy.
"So embarrassing," Shen Qingqiu grumbled, darting his head away. "Don't look at me like some lovesick maiden."
"Sorry," Yue Qingyuan said as Shen Qingqiu glared at him. "Ah, this Qi-ge was just very happy."
"Better," Shen Qingqiu sniffed. "Work on using your words more, ok?"
"If that's what Xiao-Jiu wants—"
The pounding of footsteps echoed from both sides of the raised porch. Both of them turned to find a collection of their martial siblings stumbling out into the garden. The group looked first at each other in confusion then all their gazes landed on Yue Qingyuan and Shen Qingqiu.
"Shixiong!" Liu Qingge's cheeks were flushed and his hair disheveled as if he'd ended up rolling around somewhere.
"Finally," Qi Qingqi said from beside him, noticeably less ruffled than Liu Qingge.
"At least Yue-shixiong found him." Wei Qingwei ducked through the door on the other side of the raised porch, a smile twitching up his lips.
One by one everyone nodded. Shen Qingqiu looked from face to face in disbelief, a soft haze flooding his mind. They were all still looking for him? Were they really so worried? He could never have expected that they'd spend so much time just to make sure he was alright.
Shang Qinghua poked his head out from behind Wei Qingwei.
"Good, you still seem well enough, Shixiong. Mu-shidi needs to look at you for just a few moments."
Shen Qingqiu's smile slipped away. He didn't want to see Mu Qingfang. He was fine. Everything was good and the night was perfect. He didn't want that to change. The group of his martial siblings moved aside to let Mu Qingfang step forward. Shen Qingqiu's skin prickled, a worry threading up his spine.
He scrambled off Yue Qingyuan's lap, nimbly dodging as Yue Qingyuan tried to pull him back. He turned first towards one door, then the other, but the exits were blocked.
"Shen-shixiong, have I done something to you?" Mu Qingfang asked.
Shen Qingqiu shook his head, taking a step back farther into the garden. The moon was high above, casting everything around him in a soft blue glow. He could feel the tension trying to slip from his body. It was so much nicer to just stand here in the garden in soft lantern light. He didn't need anyone to examine him. He was fine. But Mu Qingfang was still watching him closely and he couldn't quite sink into the haziness of his thoughts the way he wanted to.
"Shen-shixiong?" Mu Qingfang took a step forward and Shen Qingqiu took another step back.
"Mu-shidi has done nothing. I admire him a great deal." Shen Qingqiu wrapped his arms around his chest. He didn't like the way his mind swirled, his muscles tightening like he was getting ready to run. But still the words spilled out of his mouth. "He is a good doctor and has never said anything about all the scarring I came to the sect with."
Yue Qingyuan winced. There was a scattering of whispers as his martial siblings all turned to each other, but Shen Qingqiu could barely make out any of it. Mu Qingfang stepped down into the garden and Shen Qingqiu took another step back. Mu Qingfang's head tipped, his lips pursing then he nodded and held up his hands.
"It's alright, Shixiong, I just want to ask a few questions," he said. "What did you drink this evening?"
"Everyone keeps asking me that," Shen Qingqiu pouted. "It was just juice."
"Of course it was," Mu Qingfang nodded. "But what did it taste like?"
"Nice," Shen Qingqiu hummed. "Like plum wine, but without the alcohol. A little floral."
"I see. And how does Shixiong feel now?"
"Annoyed," Shen Qingqiu huffed. "Unpleasant. I don't like this conversation."
"It's alright. It won't take long," Mu Qingfang said. "How did you feel earlier this evening?"
The worry started to slip off him like water. This wasn't at all what he expected. After being chased around all evening, he thought this conversation would be more unpleasant but Mu Qingfang was as even natured as always.
He tilted his head as he considered how it had felt to talk to each of his martial siblings, to enjoy the music and the scent of flowers in the spring air, to watch the soft glow of lantern light or the dizzying spill of colors whenever he turned too fast.
"It made me happy. I've never been to a party and felt comfortable, before."
There was more whispering from his other martial siblings but his attention was on Mu Qingfang.
"Alright shixiong, will you answer just a few more questions?"
Shen Qingqiu narrowed his eyes, lips pursing. "If you want."
"Then you'll have to forgive me," Mu Qingfang's smile tightened. "But let's start with something easy. Shixiong, what's your favorite food?"
"Tanghulu, no tangren," Shen Qingqiu frowned. "No dragon's beard. Ah—"
"Sweets then?"
"Mmm," Shen Qingqiu nodded. "They're my favorite. I barely ever got them when I was little."
"Thank you," Mu Qingfang said. "Just a few more. Where did you learn to play the pipa?"
This one was another easy question and Shen Qingqiu found himself relaxing more, swaying a little on his feet as he hummed.
"From Meifen-jie."
"Not your shizun?" Mu Qingfang cocked a brow and Shen Qingqiu snorted.
"No. He never has any time for me. Meifen-jie made sure I didn't fall behind."
"And who is Meifen-jie"
"My friend at the Warm Red Pavilion." Shen Qingqiu thought she would have liked this party. Any party would have been made better with her there. She taught him the pipa and the guqin and the erhu, but she'd never quite managed to teach him how to be relaxed in a crowd the way she was.
Mu Qingfang's ears went red and Shen Qingqiu snickered. She would have thought that was funny, too.
"Are you— Are you intimate with her?" Mu Qingfang asked.
"No! With Meifen-jie? No! Never."
"Ah, I see. What about the rest of the women there?"
Shen Qingqiu's lips turned down. "No, why would you ask? What a strange question."
The redness from Mu Qingfang's ears spread to his cheeks and he took a deep breath before continuing. "You never have because Shen-shixiong… Shen-shixiong prefers men?"
"That and they're like my jies. It would be weird," Shen Qingqiu sniffed.
The group of his martial siblings all broke out into hushed whispers, Qi Qingqi's voice cutting through the noise with an "I told you so."
Mu Qingfang shook his head. "Just a few more questions. How do you feel about Liu Qingge?"
Shen Qingqiu snorted. Truly, what strange questions! But he didn't mind so much even if he didn't understand their importance. It was like the words all just slipped out of him without him even needing to think about them
"He's so rude. A brute. Just because he is so talented and so pretty doesn't mean he shouldn't learn manners," Shen Qingqiu said.
Liu Qingge face was bright red as he stared down at the floor and grumbled, "see."
"I think that's enough." Yue Qingyuan stood.
"Apologies Shixiong. Just one more," Mu Qingfang said. "Are you happy on Cang Qiong Mountain?"
Shen Qingqiu frowned, gaze moving from Mu Qingfang to each of his martial siblings. They were all watching him, unmoving. His skin prickled, his mind flitting through thoughts that he didn't want to focus on. He didn't like it. He didn't want to think of those things. But he couldn't stop the words climbing up his throat.
"No," he shook his head. "Why would you ask me that? Don't you know already? You all hated me from the beginning. You—"
"That's enough, Mu-shidi," Yue Qingyuan said. His voice sliced through the air, cool and direct. Yue Qingyuan would barely ever take a stand, would never say anything when it needed to be said, would bow his head and remain silent rather than forcing an issue. But it seemed even he could make an impression when he wanted to.
"Apologies," Mu Qingfang bowed his head. "I did not wish to upset Shen-shixiong, but I had to be sure." He softened his smile when he turned his attention back to Shen Qingqiu. That was easier. Shen Qingqiu didn't have to think about how alone he was anymore. He could just allow the warm regard of his gathered martial siblings to wash over him. When had he ever received an apology anyway?
It was alright. It was all alright.
"Well," Liu Qingge huffed. "What's the issue?"
"Shen-shixiong must have consumed the juice from the fruit Paradise's Open Embrace. As to why it's here is anyone's guess." Mu Qingfang said. "It works both as an intoxicant like alcohol, but also increases the pleasant feelings of anyone who consumes it. This lowers their mental defenses and they end up answering any question asked truthfully. They usually feel so good under its effects they will even volunteer information."
"Well that explains the compliments," Qi Qingqi said, scuffing her boot against the floor.
"But not why Shen-shixiong kept running away," Wei Qingwei said.
"Ah, I have an explanation for that as well," Mu Qingfang nodded. "Because it uses pleasant feelings, it also drives the one intoxicated to run away from anything negative. As you have all seen this evening."
"So what? We had to chase him down because we made him feel bad?" Qi Qingqi cocked a brow.
"Sort of," Mu Qingfang said. "I believe Shen-shixiong probably had some stress over being told repeatedly there was something wrong with him. And because all of you kept mentioning me—" He paused to shoot a long look at the gathered group, "Shen-shixiong then started to associate me with those negative feelings."
"I was trying to help," Liu Qingge grumbled, crossing his arms. He was getting flustered again. It was actually quite cute. Shen Qingqiu raised his hand to hide his growing smile.
"Shen- Shixiong," Mu Qingfang called his attention back. "Do you understand? Everyone was mistaken. There's nothing wrong with you."
Shen Qingqiu's gut twisted and he frowned at Mu Qingfang, "But you just said—"
"I just said what you drank. But it's alright." Mu Qingfang stretched out a hand. "It won't do anything to you. Now come along, we can enjoy the rest of the party alright?"
Shen Qingqiu stared at Mu Qingfang's open palm, beckoning him forward. Even through his hazy thoughts, he couldn't shake the feeling that he was being tricked somehow.
"Really shixiong, it was all a mistake," Mu Qingfang smiled. "Everyone was just worried about you, so come sit down. Shang-shixiong will get you something to eat."
"I will?" Shang Qinghua made a loud oof. "I will! Alright, I will."
Shen Qingqiu looked around. "You were all worried about me?"
His martial siblings all nodded, making various noises of assent. Like a stone dropped into a pond, the worry rippled through his mind, rippling out through his thoughts until it sank to the bottom. He smiled. If they all really were worried about him, if they had gone through so much trouble to make sure he was safe, then it could only mean that he had been wrong. They didn't hate him.
"See, its alright. Now come here," Mu Qingfang said.
Shen Qingqiu sank back into the warm haze of his thoughts. The lightness returned, filtering through his body as he drifted over to Mu Qingfang. Mu Qingfang favored him with a soft smile, placing a warm hand on his shoulder. Shen Qingqiu had thought a lot of things about his martial siblings, so sure of their disregard for him. But for Mu Qingfang, he'd never felt the same negativity. He thought he probably actually quite liked this shidi of his.
He swayed a little then curled his hands around Mu Qingfang's face. Mu Qingfang blinked, his lips parting. Shen Qingqiu wanted to shave his weird little mustache but other than that—
"Mu-shidi is handsome and a good doctor," Shen Qingqiu said. "He's never said anything harsh to me even about my qi deviations and was always discreet even after he saw the brand on my shoulder. This shixiong has always been thankful for that."
Mu Qingfang coughed, gaze sliding away. "It's nothing, shixiong."
"Mmm," Shen Qingqiu hummed. He was feeling a little sleepy. And cold again. He didn't like that. He'd just worked everything out and he wasn't ready to stop yet. Mu Qingfang hummed as his eyes tracked along Shen Qingqiu's face.
"Shixiong likes sweets," he said. There was a rustling as he felt around his sleeve, then held out a wrapped piece of candy. "Do you want this for now? Then we can go find something else for you to eat."
Shen Qingqiu's eyes darted to the piece of candy as a smile curled up his lips. He nodded and popped it in his mouth as soon as Mu Qingfang handed it over. The taste was sugary and floral and Shen Qingqiu bounced on the balls of his feet, feeling even better than before.
"Mu-shidi is so nice," he took a step back and everything swayed around him, his vision going dark at the corners. "Mu-shidi—" He swallowed. As the sugar melted over his tongue, his limbs grew heavy. Spots formed in front of his vision. He had a moment of confusion before he was falling forward into Mu Qingfang's waiting arms. His last thought was warm and full of affection. At least his shidi had caught him.
Mu Qingfang shifted Shen Qingqiu to get a better grip. It was surprisingly easy. For all his shixiong 's height and lean muscle, he was lighter than Mu Qingfang expected. Something to file away to think about after the current problem was solved.
Yue Qingyuan jolted to his feet at the same moment Liu Qingge shouldered past the others and hopped off the raised porch.
"He's fine," Mu Qingfang said, letting Yue Qingyuan take Shen Qingqiu from his arms. Shen Qingqiu's head lolled to the side, his body as loose as a doll's. Mu Qingfang frowned as a tendril of some worry slithered through his chest. More things to file away for later. "I just gave him something to knock him out. Paradise's Open Embrace keeps increasing its effect until the consumer is incapacitated then it eats through their meridians. Shen-shixiong was never going to let us flush it from his system willingly, so I thought this was better."
"Clever," Qi Qingqi snorted.
"He's not going to be happy about that when he wakes up," Xu Qingyu4 laughed, taking a swig from the flask he always carried with him.
"He's not going to be happy about any of this when he wakes up." Wei Qingwei rubbed his temples
"Did you hear? He thinks we all hate him." Shi Qingxing5 frowned. "Since the beginning."
"I wonder who's fault that is," Shang Qinghua grumbled.
Liu Qingge glared. "You—"
"Hush," Qi Qingqi snapped. "You antagonize him all the time."
"Yeah, then what do you do?" Wei Qingwei arched a brow. Qi Qingqi shot him a venomous sneer, her lips curling up.
"Enough," Yue Qingyuan said. He barely needed to raise his voice, all of them quieting down immediately. "We'll deal with the rest of the matters raised this evening later. Mu-Shidi, what do we do to cure Qingqiu-shidi."
"We'll need to continuously circulate his qi until he wakes up to make sure all intoxicants are cleared from his system," Mu Qingfang said. "It'll be best to take shifts."
"Nasty poison," Qi Qingqi said, stepping down into the garden to come peer into Shen Qingqiu's deeply sleeping face. "It seemed harmless enough."
"Thats the point of it, I imagine." Mu Qingfang took one of Shen Qingqiu's wrists, humming as he let his qi flow through Shen Qingqiu's meridians. They were alright, full of the same blockages as usual, but not too damaged yet by the poison. That was good. "Easy to get information from someone who is having the best night of their life."
"Strange though," Qi Qingqi turned back to survey the bright lantern lit room just on the other side of the garden door. There was music still playing, people still laughing. No one had seemed to notice the sudden disappearance of Cang Qiong Mountain's next generation of Peak Lords.
"What?" Liu Qingge said.
"How did it get here?" Qi Qingqi said, "Shen-shixiong can be difficult but I doubt he was the intended target."
"Who can say?" Shang Qinghua shuffled. "But he seems to be the only one affected, so lets just focus on him for now."
They all exchanged a look but Mu Qingfang had to admit he was right. Best to get Shen Qingqiu settled somewhere quiet so they could start working out the poison.
…
Shen Qingqiu woke up to his head spinning but his body strangely relaxed. He was warm to the tips of his toes, comfortable curled in soft sheets with barely an ache to be had. He squeezed his eyes shut more tightly, unwilling to move just yet when he'd apparently gotten the best sleep he'd had in years. He traced back through his hazy memory of the night before and couldn't remember how he fell asleep. The last thing that came to him was the sweet taste of plum juice and then the rest was blurry, only snippets of colors and a floating giddiness rising out of the murk in his mind.
He frowned. He had a bad feeling about this.
Something shifted beside him on the bed and his heart flew into his throat. He jolted up, body tensing. His qi fluttered. Someone had to have been circulating it. He whipped around to find Yue Qingyuan fast asleep on one side of him and Wei Qingwei on the other. Wei Qingwei's hand was still half raised, the remnants of his qi sliding through the thread-thin connection between them before the last of it severed and fell away.
"Shixiong is awake. How do you feel?" Wei Qingwei asked.
"How do I—" Shen Qingqiu broke off as he looked around. Nearly all of his martial siblings were there, each in a different state of slumber and disarray. Mu Qingfang was in the chair facing the bed, head tipped into his upturned palm like he had simply rested it there and could no longer keep his eyes open. A thin trail of drool streaked down his chin.
Shang Qinghua was leaning against the side of the bed, collapsed in a heap and snoring in tiny whistling breaths. Xu Qingyu was face down on his rolled up robe on the floor, arms flat to his sides. This was not the first time Shen Qingqiu had seen the man passed out, but the pose still made his lips quirk up at the corners.
What was surprising was seeing Feng Qinglun slumped over the low table instead of straight backed and meditating the way Shen Qingqiu had found him on the morning of every mission they'd ever been on together.
Bai Qingsheng and Shi Qingxing were laying tangled together on the floor like sleeping cats under one of the beds blankets. Liu Qingge was nowhere to be seen, but Qi Qingqi was sitting on the raised porch just outside the room's door overlooking an unfamiliar garden. So they were no longer in Huan Hua Palace. Strange.
Qi Qingqi's head cocked then she turned and shot him a smile. He tensed on instinct, a nervous tremor running down his spine. What was going on?
"You were poisoned," Wei Qingqwei answered before Shen Qingqiu could even form the question. "We had to circulate your qi while you slept to make sure it didn't harm you."
Shen Qingqiu stared at him. Where did he even start? So many questions were flicking through his head that he couldn't get them to settle. How had he even been poisoned? And why were all his martial siblings here? Surely it didn't take eleven people to circulate one person's qi. Yue Qingyuan's presence, he could understand. It would certainly look badly on the future sect leader if the person he brought to Cang Qiong Mountain was killed at another sect's party. And Mu Qingfang made sense. He was dedicated to his craft after all.
But everyone else?
He shifted, shivering in the crisp early morning air. He looked down to find he was only in a single robe and that single robe was not his. Not only that but his hair was down. Where were his things? The familiar swell of panic rose up from his gut even as he swallowed hard to push it down. His nails cut into his palms. What had happened last night?
"Where are my clothes," he snapped. "This isn't—"
"Wei-shixiong," Qi Qingqi huffed, rolling her eyes as she stood up and made her way over to sit on the edge of the bed. "What did you say to him you big brute? He's panicking as soon as he woke up."
Shen Qingqiu's ears went hot. "I'm not—"
Qi Qingqi reached out and flicked Shen Qingqiu in the head. "Shut your mouth and calm down. We didn't spend all night purging your meridians for you to wake up and qi deviate."
"I didn't do anything. He just wanted to know about his clothes," Wei Qingqwei grumbled.
"I'm right here! Stop talking about me like—"
"Didn't I tell you to be quiet?" Qi Qingqi cocked a brow. "Me, Bai-shimei, and Shi-shimei changed your clothes. You don't have to worry."
Shen Qingqiu stopped. "What?"
"Meng Qingtian was getting everyone drinks while we got you settled in the inn here and the dumb fool spilled one all over your robes." She shrugged. "I know how particular you are and I didnt want you passed out in wet clothes so I sent your robes to be cleaned and then borrowed the ones you're wearing from the innkeeper." She crossed her arms, mumbling, "As if I'd let any of these bastards change your clothes while you slept. I didn't want to deal with your temper this morning."
Shen Qingqiu stared at Qi Qingqi, looking for a lie, and found none. He didn't know how Qi Qingqi knew to be that considerate of him, let alone even care enough to go through the trouble.
"Oh stop with the shocked look. You can say thank you, you know? Don't go around chastising Liu-shidi when you can't even manage that," Qi Qingqi said.
"When did I—" He stopped and shook his head. There was too much he didn't remember. He certainly couldn't try and understand it all right now. He tightened his jaw, but he felt wrong-footed, unsure of what to do from here. But there was a lingering softness in his limbs and the strangeness of the morning somehow made it a little easier to bow his head. "Thank you, shimei."
Qi Qingqi lips turned up, far too smug, then reached out and ruffled his hair. "See, not so hard is it, Shixiong?"
Snapping branches and a breaking roof tile had Shen Qingqiu tensing again. He whipped his head up then let out a long sigh. So there was Liu Qingge. He had a large sack in his hand that he didn't seem to care much about as he cleared the garden wall and landed on the other side, robes still somehow perfectly white.
"I swear he needs a babysitter," Qi Qingqi grumbled. She stood striding out into the garden. "What are you doing—you're going to crush everything!"
"I got breakfast. Stop complaining," Liu Qingge huffed.
"Does it matter if you make us eat squished food? Give me that." Qi Qingqi made a grab for the bag. Liu Qingge side stepped.
Shen Qingqiu rolled his eyes. "Wei-shidi, did you see—"
He stopped as he turned to find Wei Qingqwei already deeply asleep. He looked exhausted, just like Yue Qingyuan on the other side of the bed. Yue Qingyuan's brows were drawn down, a deep furrow formed between them. He looked worried even in sleep, just the same as when they were children.
Shen Qingqiu shook his head. His hand drifted out before he could think better of it and smoothed the space between Yue Qingyuan's brows. Yue Qingyuan mumbled something then turned onto his side and burrowed into the blankets like he really was still that little scrawny kid he'd once been. Shen Qingqiu snorted, then clambered out of the bed and onto his feet.
He found one of Meng Qingtian's fur-lined robes on the floor, and Meng Qingtian himself somehow squeezed underneath the bed. Shen Qingqiu stared, then shook his head. What a strange man, but if his shidi had messed up Shen Qingqiu's robes, Shen Qingqiu thought it was only fair to steal one for himself.
He shrugged the robe on, feeling warmer already, then made his way over to the raised porch to stare out at the now sparring Qi Qingqi and Liu Qingge.
A rustling drew his attention and he turned to find Mu Qingfang stretching. He shuffled to the side to make room as his shidi rose to stand next to him.
"I wasn't expecting Shen-shixiong to be awake, but you are as resilient as ever," Mu Qingfang said. "It's like when I saw you take a Striped Tiger Drake claw to your side and walk back to the inn as if you hadn't been touched."
"As I recall, I missed some of the blood dripping from my sleeve and you demanded I let you into my room," Shen Qingqiu sniffed. He'd only been on Cang Qiong Mountain a year at that point and he'd been so worried Mu Qingfang would rat him out to his Shizun and he'd be thrown off the mountain no matter what Yue Qingyuan said. It was also the first time Shen Qingqiu had learned how discreet Mu Qingfang could be.
"And aren't you glad I did. You would have reopened your wound on the way back to the mountain the next day." Mu Qingfang arched a brow. "How do you feel now?" He held out a hand, meeting Shen Qingqiu's gaze.
Shen Qingqiu sighed. Again, Mu Qingfang had helped him without being asked and had apparently gathered the rest of their martial siblings to do it. After a moment he placed his wrist in Mu Qingfang's hand, trying not to tense as Mu Qingfang's qi started to wind through him.
Mu Qingfang's gaze went far away, as his qi passed through Shen Qingqiu like a cool stream. Then he nodded and stepped away.
"All the poison seems to be cleared. That's good."
Shen Qingqiu watched as Qi Qingqi flipped over Liu Qingge's head, her triumphant grin quickly replaced by a scowl as Liu Qingge stole the bag back.
"Did everyone really volunteer to stay with me all night," Shen Qingqiu asked.
"They did. I think perhaps they all felt a little bad after some of things you said."
Shen Qingqiu froze, his thoughts spiking into a fevered cacophony of all the things that could mean. Mu Qingfang patted him on the shoulder.
"It's alright, nothing too scandalous. Yue-shixiong also took the time to set us straight that you were not the instigator of the difficulties between you and him." Mu Qingfang shot him a knowing look. "Don't worry about that either. He didn't speak much, but it's clear you weren't rude to him out of entitlement or because you were spoiled."
Shen Qingqiu crossed his arms and turned his head away, shocked out of his rising panic for the second time that morning. He couldn't imagine what could have changed so much in one night to suddenly be treated with such care by people who could barely stand to be in a room with him.
"I don't want your pity," he grumbled.
"Good, because I wasn't going to give it to you," Mu Qingfang replied. "You have a bad temper and are quick to judge. You should work on those things." Shen Qingqiu glared at him but he only smiled back. "But you're our shixiong, so we can all work on some things too. We'll all be Peak Lords together. You dont deserve to be ostracized because of some misunderstandings."
Shen Qingqiu's fingers curled into his palm. This was what he had always wanted wasn't it? The thing he had dreamed about as he waited for Yue Qingyuan to come back for him, to save him from that beast who called himself a young lord. Hadn't he wanted to have the type of people who would take care of him, who he could trust?
He didn't know if this was it. He had spent so long doubting every motive of the people around him and bearing the weight of their disdain that he didn't know if he could believe they hadn't only taken care of him out of some misplaced obligation.
He watched Qi Qingqi and Liu Qingge traded a few more blows, lighthearted and easy. Liu Qingge looked up and caught his eye. His face turned bright red and while he was distracted Qi Qingqi swiped the bag back from him, her laugh trilling into the air.
Liu Qingge glared and lunged for her and they were back to trading blows again. Shen Qingqiu snorted. They acted like a bunch of children, not future leaders of their generation of Cang Qiong Mountain disciples. But even so he couldn't help but think it was a little cute.
"Shixiong," Mu Qingfang said. "You should come for tea at Qian Cao Peak when we return."
Shen Qingqiu paused. He'd never been invited for tea before.
"If you don't want to—" Mu Qingfang started.
"Who said I didn't want to?" Shen Qingqiu snapped.
"Then you should come. I think you'll like to see the plants we're growing. Some of them will make quite nice paints."
Shen Qingqiu steeled his expression, wishing he had his fan. He didn't know the right way to react, too afraid of seeming too eager or coming across as cold after receiving an invitation. He shuffled from one side to the other, wrongfooted again.
"I'd like to see them," he said after a moment.
Mu Qingfang nodded his head and smiled. Liu Qingge did a quick kick then a thrust of his palm and Qi Qingqi went flying, finally ending the match. Shen Qingqiu snorted.
"You know, generally, you would have already come to pay me a visit," Mu Qingfang said.
Shen Qingqiu's brow furrowed. He wondered if he was being criticized but Mu Qingfang's tone was even. His lips tilted up as his eyes cut to the side to meet Shen Qingqiu's.
"That's what I thought. You didn't know," Mu Qingfang said. "Shixiong, it's customary on Cang Qiong Mountain to pay your shidi and shimei a visit when you are named successor, to come to their peak for tea and see how they are. Well now you know. So after you come see me, you should go visit everyone else. I think they'd like that. I'm sure they've all felt a little neglected."
Shen Qingqiu dropped his gaze, feeling his ears heat up again. He couldn't imagine that was true and that his shidi and shimei actually wanted him showing up to pay them a visit. He hated even more that Mu Qingfang had found a gap in his knowledge that all his observations had somehow missed. A familiar sick feeling churned through his stomach.
Mu Qingfang sighed, then bumped his shoulder. "Why don't you just come for tea with me, first. We can work up from there."
Shen Qingqiu huffed but somehow, he felt a little lighter anyway. If it was just one afternoon, he thought he could manage that much. He nodded, then bumped Mu Qingfang's shoulder back.
1 Feng Qinglun (清倫 Clear Order/Human relations, related to ethics) of the canon peak of Ascetics, Ku Xing Peak return to text ↩
2 Bai Qingsheng (清声 Clear Sound/Voice) from the non-canon Ling Yu Peak (泠玉峰, the Peak of Sounding Jade), the peak for musical cultivation. return to text ↩
3 Meng Qingtian (清湉 Clear Calm Water) from Shou Ling Peak (兽灵峰, the Peak of Sacred Creatures), the peak for studying the beasts of the world. return to text ↩
4 Xu Qingyu (清雨 Clear Rain) from the canon alcohol peak, Zui Xian. return to text ↩
5 Shi Qingxing(清星 Clear Star) from non-canon Yu Feng Peak (御风峰 Peak of Guiding Wind), the peak for diviners. return to text ↩