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There are a multitude of feelings that Heeseung makes Jake feel. For starters, there’s happiness and joy. Heeseung is just naturally so funny, but he’s also kind and sweet. He thinks of Jake first when doing almost everything, he spends time thinking of cute date ideas and paying for those dates, too. He genuinely makes Jake feel extremely happy in every aspect of the word.
He makes Jake feel seen and understood. Heeseung put in the effort that it took to truly get to know Jake on a deeper level, and he also learned how to talk to Jake when he was upset or angry. He learned how to be patient, even if patience was unfamiliar to someone as hot headed as Heeseung used to be.
He also makes Jake feel loved, even in moments where it sometimes felt like he didn’t love himself. Heeseung was always there to remind him of how much he deserved love, and how much he was loved too—by his family, by his friends and especially by Heeseung himself.
Now that he’s going to lose all of that, Heeseung has made him feel sadness for the very first time.
His heart aches, knowing that in a few hours he’s going to have to say goodbye—if his parents even allow it. Jake and Heeseung have been together for almost two years now and he had initially been keeping it a secret from his parents because he knew that they’d never accept somebody like Heeseung into their family.
Lee Heeseung was the resident bad boy in their small town. He was known for smoking cigarettes, riding around town on his loud motorcycle, and selling drugs—typical bad boy stereotyping. Even though all of those things were true—if selling weed once could be considered selling drugs plural—Heeseung was generally a sweetheart.
They met at school, where Heeseung was dangerously close to failing out and Jake was at the top of his class. He was instructed by their principal to tutor Heeseung for volunteer hours, and so that Heeseung could graduate and the rest is history.
Even if there were rumors circling around Heeseung—rumors like he was in a gang, or he was addicted to drugs—Jake didn’t care. Mainly because he could tell that none of it was true. Heeseung wasn’t what people painted him out to be at all. He was introverted, sincere and a loner by nature. He had a tough family life and he was from the wrong side of the tracks, but none of it mattered to Jake. The Heeseung that he had fallen in love with was the best person he’s ever met—still is to this day.
Which is why everything is taking such a toll on him now. It’s nearing one in the morning, and Jake hasn’t been able to go to sleep. He had just been with Heeseung earlier that day for a dinner date, but they were both a little down the entire time. Even if Heeseung had tried to make it better by planning a beautiful date, their gloomy moods could not be fixed.
Tomorrow morning, bright and early, Jake’s parents are driving him to his university nearly five hours away. It’ll definitely be a change for him, especially because it was in the city and he had only ever been familiar with their small town. Contrary to thinking he wouldn’t ever want to go back to school, Heeseung is in an eighteen month trade program that he actually really enjoys. For that reason, he can’t really leave their town until he gets his certification in a year and saves up enough money to follow Jake.
Jake knows that doing things like this is for the best. Heeseung loved working on cars and had managed to secure a spot at an extremely well known and well accredited trade school. He would be able to find work anywhere once he finished his program which would make it easier to follow Jake to the city in the long run.
But if things don’t work out because of the long distance, Jake doesn’t know if he’d ever forgive himself. Heeseung had urged him to go to the university farther away, reassuring him that they’d be fine. He had promised to visit, but Jake truly worries that they’ll lose their spark. The thought stresses him out to the highest degree, which explains why he’s been twisting and turning in bed ever since he got home almost three hours ago.
Even though he technically already said goodbye to Heeseung after dinner, he had begged his boyfriend to come in the morning, regardless of what his parents had to say about it. Even if he knows that he’ll see him again soon, the thought of leaving Heeseung here, leaving their relationship here, is a lot to bear. Even if he knows that they’ll still be together after he leaves, Jake just can’t help but be restless. What if Heeseung finds someone else while he’s gone? What if he realizes that he doesn’t feel as strongly as he thought he did for Jake? What if he gets tired of waiting or eventually falls out of love?
He can’t help but to catastrophize and plague his mind with what ifs. His entire life is packed into boxes. Everything that he’s accumulated over eighteen years has either been packed in a box to come with him, thrown away, or put into storage. Everything from Heeseung is coming with him, even the old hoodie that he gave Jake when they first started dating. It’s what he’s currently wearing and what he hopes to wear tomorrow when he moves into his new dorm.
His eyes roam from the ceiling over to the other side of his room, where all of his boxes are neatly stacked on top of each other. The one on the top is not taped yet, cardboard flap hanging open. Jake furrows his eyebrows, eyeing the roll of tape on his desk and getting out of bed with a sigh. The last thing that he wants to do is forget about it tomorrow and have things getting lost.
He stretches his limbs before he’s walking over to the box, not forgetting to grab the packing tape. He gets on his knees and peers inside, heart softening when he sees the stuffed animal that Heeseung won him at the summer fair last year. He pulls it out of the box and stares at it.
It’s a baby pink bear and on each of the paws they had written their names with a heart next to them. He brings it up to his nose and inhales when he smells the scent of Heeseung’s cologne. They had taken the time to spray it last week, just so Jake could feel like he was sleeping next to Heeseung every night. The thought now makes his eyes water and he brings the bear closer to his chest, nuzzling his face against the fur.
He’s going to miss Heeseung and the one thing he wants is to be able to go to sleep knowing that he’ll still have him when he wakes up. Right now, he’s not entirely sure that he will. The thought is harrowing, especially because he and Heeseung made a promise to each other to at least try long distance.
Jake picks the bear up and sets the packaging tape on top of the box as a way to remind him to close it tomorrow. He wants to sleep with the bear, to feel as close as possible to Heeseung.
Just as he’s getting ready to turn off his lamp and attempt to sleep again, there’s the sound of something hitting his window. He stops walking, trying to still his breathing as he listens for it again.
When it happens again, Jake feels his body fill with fear as he goes to grab his phone. His first thought is to text his boyfriend since he’s the only person who he trusts enough to come help him, but then he thinks twice when he glances at the time.
He doesn’t want to bother Heeseung or wake him up, especially if he’s going to wake up early and say goodbye to Jake in the morning. Instead, Jake looks around his room until he lands on something that would work well as a weapon. He finds an academic trophy, one of the things that he decided not to pack, and takes it into his hand. His fingers are wrapped tight around it as his heart beats sporadically.
In all honesty, Jake is nervous to open his curtain and see who is down there. For all he knows, it could be somebody trying to murder him. With that thought in mind, Jake grabs the pepper spray that he keeps in his bedside drawer and prays that it sprays far enough to hit whoever is down there if they prove to be a threat.
With baited breath, he inches towards the window, being careful not to make any sudden movements as he does so. He gently opens the blinds and peaks through them, only to let out a sign of relief when he sees his boyfriend down there, a pebble in his hand like he was getting ready to throw it again.
Jake slowly lifts the blinds and opens the window, wincing once it squeaks and he removes the screen out of the way.
Heeseung is standing there in his pajamas as he looks up at Jake with a dopey smile on his face. He lifts his hand up and waves, illuminated by the bright light of the moon. Jake can’t help but to be endeared by his cuteness, an involuntary smile forming on his face. Of course he’s always happy to see his boyfriend, but he also can’t help but wonder what exactly Heeseung is doing here.
“What are you doing?” Jake asks, trying to keep his voice quiet so that his parents don’t hear but also loud enough that Heeseung does.
“Couldn’t stop thinking of you,” Heeseung replies, voice sincere. The wind is softly blowing through his hair, dark stands moving away from his forehead. He looks so soft, cozy in his blue matching pajamas that Jake bought him and old, worn slippers. It’s crazy to think that this is the boy who is always perceived as a bad boy by the rest of their town.
“Heeseung…you know I can’t come down,” he softly says, the pain apparent in his voice. If it were up to Jake, he would be spending his last night in town with Heeseung, but unfortunately his parents would actually murder him.
“Please,” Heeseung says, moving closer to the window and craning his neck up so that he could make eye contact with Jake from an entire story below him. “I know that I’ve been acting fine about this whole thing, but Jake, I need to see you. I can’t give you the goodbye that I want to with your parents watching us.”
“My parents will kill me if they find out, Hee,” Jake sadly says, close to shutting the window because he can feel that he doesn’t have much more resolve in him to continue ignoring Heeseung’s advances.
“They won’t. Please, Yunnie. I need you,” Heeseung breathes out.
Jake finds that he doesn’t have any resolve when it comes to Heeseung. Before he knows it, he’s pulling on Heeseung’s hoodie and a pair of shorts, quietly leaving his room and padding down the stairs. He’s done this enough times to know exactly which steps creak the loudest and how to bribe Layla into not making a commotion about the fact that he’s leaving. All it takes is one treat and a minute of belly rubs before she’s falling back asleep and he’s free to walk out of their back door. The alarm system on that door has been broken for the better part of the year, but before that he would climb out of the window in the living room.
Anyways, Jake makes sure to close the door quietly behind him before he’s rounding the house and meeting Heesueng right below his bedroom window. Without a second thought, Heeseung’s arms are around his waist and pulling him in close. Jake buries his face into Heeseung’s neck, nosing at a patch of skin that smells like his bodywash—lavender with a hint of something sweet. The hug is saccharine, no words need to be exchanged between them as they take a moment to really embrace the other person’s presence. Heeseung’s hands don’t move from his waist as he pulls further away in favor of connecting his lips with Jake’s.
The kiss is soft, the taste of Heeseung’s chapstick strong against Jake’s own lips. The plushness of their lips melding together makes him feel like he’s melting as he attempts to get impossibly closer to Heeseung. He feels warm all over, letting out a quiet sigh against his boyfriend as Heeseung’s tongue swipes across his bottom lip. He can tell that the older man is hungry for more, and he doesn’t really blame him. They haven’t been able to have sex in a long time. They used to be able to do it in Jake’s bedroom whenever his parents would leave, but it seems like they’ve become overnight homebodies since they never leave the house anymore.
So they switched it up and began doing it in Jake’s car, only to get caught by the late night supermarket security guards—they were lucky to only end up with a warning that time. Maybe his parents were right—maybe Heeseung was a bad influence on him. Jake remembers being scared shitless that night, which only led to Heeseung having to comfort him and reassure him that they’d be fine.
Jake never wanted to risk anything like that again, especially because he didn’t want to jeopardize his opportunity to go to college. So yes, maybe he has been blue balling Heeseung for awhile now, which would explain why his boyfriend is being so needy, but he’s just as desperate. Unfortunately for the both of them, they can’t really do anything right now.
Jake pulls away from the kiss when Heeseung’s hands start to roam and cup his ass. The last thing they need right now is to get even more horny and have no way to expel that energy.
“Heeseung, we can’t. I have to go back up,” Jake says.
“No you don’t,” Heeseung mumbles, lips attempting to catch Jake’s once again.
Even if he wants to give in, he can’t.
“My parents,” Jake responds, giggling when Heeseung groans and buries his face into Jake’s neck. The feeling of his hair brushing against Jake’s collarbone is ticklish, and he can’t help but to let soft giggles continuously escape him.
“Screw your parents. It’s our last night together,” Heeseung mumbles, nibbling on the skin of Jake’s collarbone.
“Hee…” Jake sighs out, closing his eyes at the feeling of Heeseung’s tongue working over the small indents from his teeth.
“Jaeyun, baby.”
Oh. When Heeseung calls him baby, it ignites a fire so hot inside of Jake that he doesn’t feel like he can combat it. The desire itself is fiery, a roaring flame in his belly that burns wildly. It’s not only a sexual lust, but an intimate lust as well. He wants to be close to Heeseung, whether they have sex or not. He wants the two of them to be the only ones in the world, enclosed in their own bubble where only they matter. He wants to hear Heeseung’s honey voice in the cusp of his ear, his melting words dripping inside of Jake ever so slowly.
“We have to be back before they wake up,” Jake says, still distracted by the Heeseung induced fog clouding his mind.
“Don’t worry,” Heeseung says, finally pulling away from Jake’s neck and instead lacing their hands together. Their palms are soft against one another, the heat between them blooming into something that makes Jake only want to hold on tighter.
“Where are we going to go?” Jake asks, falling into step beside Heeseung as the leaves and twigs crunch under their feet. As his house gets farther away, his body fills with dread and anxiety. Of course he wants to be out with Heeseung, but he can’t help but to think about how upset and disappointed his parents would be if they found out that he snuck out.
His relationship with them is a bit complicated—they expect the best from him, and he always strives for the best, but not without developing an actual fear of failure. He doesn’t want to disappoint them, not when they’ve made it clear time and time again that they won’t accept failure. On top of that, they don’t approve of Heeseung. It’s the biggest thing that he and his parents can’t seem to agree on. They don’t care that Heeseung makes Jake feel loved, they don’t care that Jake is in love with Heeseung either.
They hear the rumors in town from all of the PTA parents and assume the worst—just like everyone else. As Jake’s eyes find the soft features on Heeseung’s face—the slope of his nose, his round and doe eyes—he can’t help but to feel guilty. He had been like that too, at one point. The things that people said and believed about Heeseung were just easy rumors that brought them all away from their own problems. Jake and his friends had gone around thinking that they were better than Heeseung, simply because their families had more money than his and lived a much more privileged life.
He knows the truth now. Heeseung isn’t stone cold and mean—sure he had a temper when they first met, but he’s been working to do better, which he has been. He isn’t a bad person at all, despite what mistakes he might’ve made in the past. He’s sweet and patient and gentle and Jake loves him. He only wants his parents to love him, too.
“I was thinking we could stargaze. I told you I’d take you to my spot, didn’t I?” Heeseung says, leading Jake over to where he’s parked his bike a few houses down.
“You want me to go into the woods with you at one in the morning?!” Jake asks, feeling the nerves ignite even deeper within him. His parents would definitely kill him if they knew that Heeseung wanted to take him to the woods. “Are you planning on killing me?”
Heeseung laughs, his voice smooth and attractive as Jake falls into the sound of his joy. “There have been plenty of opportunities for me to kill you if that’s what I wanted to do. I know that you wanted to see the stars before you left. You won’t be able to see them clearly so far in the heart of the city.”
He’s right. The realization that he’s really going to be in the city is enough to put a damper on Jake’s mood. Heeseung must notice because he swings their arms together and squeezes Jake’s hand tightly.
“We’ll be okay. I’ll come visit you all the time,” he softly says. His words don’t do much to soothe the ache in Jake’s heart. They’ve made it to Heeseung’s motorcycle by now, standing in front of it as Jake considers what to say. On one hand, he wants to tell Heeseung about what exactly is bothering him. On the other, he doesn’t want to worry his boyfriend, especially when it’s clear they’ve both already got things on their minds.
“I know,” he says instead, forcing a smile that he’s not entirely sure Heeseung believes. He doesn’t comment on it though, instead patting the seat of his bike and helping Jake get on it. This is familiar for them, the way that Heeseung picks up his helmet and gently pulls it on to Jake’s head, not needing to adjust any of the straps as he buckles it below his chin. There was a time where Jake was way too afraid to even consider getting on the back of Heeseung’s motorcycle, but his boyfriend always drove safe and never went too fast, which was enough for Jake to trust him to be careful while he’s riding on the back of it.
Heeseung sweetly kisses Jake on the lips before he’s turning around and swinging his leg over the bike as well. His hands find the handles and Jake takes that as his cue to wrap his own arms around Heeseung’s torso. Heeseung starts the ignition and the engine roars to life, Heeseung revving it a few times before they’re taking off down the street. Jake rests his cheek against Heeseung’s back, taking in the feeling of the wind blowing past his face and all around them. It’s only early August, so it isn’t too cold, but Jake still feels the need to be connected to Heeseung’s body warmth in every way possible.
When they’re like this, so close to each other, Jake can’t think straight. His mind is clouded with Heeseung, with the smell of his cologne, the feel of his abs underneath Jake’s fingertips. Even if his body is thrumming with anxiety and nerves from sneaking out, Heeseung acts as a balm to soothe his worries. He hugs Heeseung tighter, trying to ignore the way that tears are brimming at his eyes and threatening to fall.
Heeseung wouldn’t be able to tell anyways, not with the way the wind is instantly drying down each tear to his cheek. He doesn’t know if he can cope without Heeseung, without his light at the end of the tunnel.
They get to the edge of the forest in no time. Heeseung parks the bike and kills the engine, pulling his key out of the ignition. He takes the helmet off of Jake and helps him down. Maybe Jake’s nose is red or his eyes are swollen, but Heeseung doesn’t need to say anything as he wraps him into a comforting hug.
Heeseung’s hand comes up to Jake’s head, mindlessly sifting through the soft strands of hair as Jake lets it all out into his chest. His sobs are loud in the quiet of the night, but Heeseung is there. He isn’t telling Jake to keep it down or to cry quieter, he’s just soothing him through it, guiding him like he always has.
“Come on, sweetheart. Don’t do this to me,” Heeseung says, voice gentle and soft.
“I’m sorry. I’m going to miss you.”
Heeseung makes a tsking sound. “No apologies, pretty. I’ll miss you too, you know that. Nothing will change between us.”
Jake cracks a small smile at the nickname, pulling his head away from Heeseung’s chest and connecting their lips instead. Heeseung kisses him back with no hesitation, his free hand squeezing Jake’s hip reassuringly. When they pull away, Heeseung brings a hand up to Jake’s thin, lightly thumbing at it as he stares down at him.
“I’m going to miss you,” he repeats, eyes glimmering with adoration. Jake thinks that he can see them start to water too, but he doesn’t comment on it. “I’ll be thinking of you every moment we’re apart. It’ll be tough at first, but we can do it, baby. There won’t be a day where you aren’t on my mind.”
Jake knows that more tears are falling, but he feels reassured nonetheless. He sniffles before pulling Heeseung into another hug. They stay like that for a minute, basking in each other’s warmth. It’s comforting and grounding, the feel of Heeseung’s arms around his body, holding him tightly and keeping him safe. Even in the darkest hours of the night, Jake feels nothing but absolute safety with Heeseung.
And then Heeseung pulls away and takes Jake’s hand instead, intertwining it with his own and leading him deeper into the forest. They’ve always had this plan—Jake would lie to his parents and say that he’s spending the night with Sunghoon or Jay, when really he was out with Heeseung. They were supposed to go earlier in the summer time, when the sky was clearer and the days were at their longest. Jake’s logic was that if they did it on the day of the summer solstice, then they’d be together for the one day that the sun shines for the longest and there would be more light than dark.
In hindsight, it doesn’t make sense when referring to stargazing, but Jake didn’t need to wait until the middle of the night when the brightest star was constantly burning right beside him. He thinks that he just wanted to see Heeseung at the center of the universe, right where he belongs.
He never got to see it, but tonight he will. He casts his head towards the sky and takes count of all of the stars decorating the darkness, like beacons of hope. Jake can’t help but to think of Heeseung again, of hope, and how he needs to always carry it with him if they want this to work when he goes away.
As if sensing his distress, Heeseung squeezes Jake’s hand as he continues to pull him along. He’s concentrated as he leads them through all of the foliage, careful to hold all of the long branches and leaves out of the way for Jake. It makes his heart flutter, how much of a gentleman Heeseung is for him. There isn’t much left of their walk, and when they finally get to what Heeseung considers his spot, Jake is in awe. In all of their almost two years of dating, Heeseung has mentioned this place, but hasn’t shown it to him. They never had time, always pushing it off until later. Later is now, and unfortunately now will be the last time for awhile.
They’ve mostly stepped out of the forest, now standing in a more open clearing right next to a small stream. The sound of the water flowing does help to soothe Jake’s nerves which are still going haywire—whether it’s from the fact that he snuck out or the fact that tomorrow he’ll wake up and have to start a new life somewhere else, he doesn’t know.
Heeseung takes off the backpack that he had been wearing and unzips it, pulling out a blanket and placing it down right beside the stream. It really is a beautiful area, they’re still surrounded by the trees, but it’s clear enough that they can actually see the sky without much trouble. His boyfriend gestures for him to sit down, and Jake does without a second thought. Heeseung takes a seat next to him, instantly throwing his arm around Jake’s shoulders and pulling him in close. Heeseung turns to place a kiss on the crown of Jake’s head, lips so gentle and fleeting.
“What do you think?” He quietly asks, as if he’s trying not to disturb the peace of the wilderness around them.
Jake’s in such a trance that he doesn’t want to speak, but Heeseung is waiting for an answer. “It’s…beautiful. I don’t know what else to say,” he says.
Heeseung hums quietly. “You’re shaking.”
“I’m cold,” Jake replies. His body does feel like it’s two seconds away from going into hypothermia. It has nothing to do with the weather around them. He doesn’t know why he lies, but he knows that Heeseung instantly catches on to it. He isn’t sure how to go about his feelings, not when he feels like he’s bothering Heeseung with his inability to get over the fact that they won’t live twenty minutes across town anymore.
“You can tell me whatever it is you’re feeling, Jaeyun. You know I won’t judge you,” Heeseung says, his hand rubbing up and down the side of Jake’s arm.
“I know,” Jake says, dangerously close to tears. “I can’t stop thinking about what will happen if you get tired of waiting for me,” he whispers, vulnerable as he bears his entire heart to Heeseung, not unlike what they’ve done in similar moments before.
“Oh, baby. I’ll never get tired of waiting for you. Get that thought out of your pretty brain,” Heeseung replies, voice sounding so genuine that it actually does make Jake shed a few tears. His vision blurs and before he knows it, he’s not able to look in Heeseung’s direction anymore.
“You don’t know that.”
Heeseung scoffs, pulling Jake back to his side and taking his chin in between his thumb and finger. He lifts Jake’s head until their eyes are locking. “No matter how many miles there are between us, my feelings won’t change. We won’t change.”
“I can’t leave you,” Jake says, voice wobbly as he finds Heeseung’s and clings on to it like if he lets go, he may never be able to hold on again.
Heeseung smiles, and even through the mess of tears, Jake can see that he’s close to crying too. He’s trying not to make it noticeable, trying to put on a strong face for Jake. “You have to. I want you to. You’re so smart, Yunnie. You have a future ahead of you, a bright one at that.”
Jake doesn’t say anything, tearing his eyes away from Heeseung and staring at the leaves in front of them. He watches as the water slowly moves downstream, a calming sight to settle the mess in his heart.
“There’s nobody that can replace you. I’ve never felt these feelings before towards anyone, and I know for a fact that they won’t ever change. Whether you move on—-”
“How could you say that? I can’t move on, I won’t.”
Heeseung sighs. “Jake, there’ll be other people. You’re not replaceable for me, there’s nobody that could come close to you. But you’ll have people falling to your feet, there will be people who can do more for you than I ever could.”
The words ring in Jake’s ears. He pushes Heeseung’s arm off of him and moves the small distance across the blanket. “I can’t believe you’d say that.”
“I’m being realistic. I don’t like it either,” Heeseung says, his voice tinged with hurt. Jake’s heart aches, he can’t stand the distance between them and regrets ever putting it there in the first place. He moves closer to Heeseung, sniffling when he puts his arm around Jake’s shoulders again in their previous position. Jake nuzzles his face into Heeseung’s chest, moving around until he’s comfortable.
“I love you so much, Jaeyun. You know that there’s no one in my life that matters to me as much as you do.”
Jake kisses Heeseung’s chest, right above his heart, no matter how ridiculous it feels. “I know. I love you too.”
Heeseung runs his hand through Jake’s hair softly, touching ever so gently. “I don’t want anything to change between us, but I don’t want to hold you back if there’s someone better for you.”
“There won’t be,” Jake says with a tone of finality, and it’s settled.
There won’t be anyone to replace either of them. They won’t let anything get in between them, no matter what Heeseung thinks. Jake knows that no one will be able to fill the void that’ll be left in his heart for the year that he’s apart from Heeseung.
“I promise that I’ll try my best to meet you up there before your second year starts,” Heeseung says, voice no louder than a whisper. Jake believes him, he knows that Heeseung has been working longer hours even if he tries to hide just how hard he’s working.
“I’ll just keep missing you until then,” Jake replies, leaning up until he’s able to capture Heeseung’s lips in his own. Heeseung kisses him back immediately, tongue quick to begin lapping at his bottom lip.
Their lips are hot and the kiss quickly becomes messy. Jake feels hypersensitive all over, maybe because of the fact that it’s been so long since he’s felt Heeseung or maybe because of his vulnerable state. Whatever it is, he doesn’t care, not when he has Heeseung right here in front of him, hands moving to feel around his body.
“You said you needed me,” Jake says, hot breath ghosting across Heeseung’s lips. He feels like he’s in a daze, eyes clouded over and brain surrounded by fog. He clings on to Heeseung harder, not wanting to separate from him.
Heeseung moans quietly, and Jake knows it’s because of what he’s said, but he makes no move to do anything about it. “We can’t, not here.”
Jake whines, throwing his leg over Heeseung and placing himself into his lap. He grinds down, taking in the sound of Heeseung’s surprised groan and the way his cock feels between his legs.
“I want to. Please, Heeseung. Tell me you need me,” Jake says, the tears blurring his eyes again.
Heeseung leans in, bringing one hand up to his face while the other one cups his waist. Jake can feel the way he’s hardening through their clothes and does the same movement again, attempting to stimulate himself even through the thick layers between them.
“You’re so gorgeous, sweet boy. There will never be anyone better for me,” Heeseung mumbles, kissing him again. “I need you.”
Jake moans into it, opening his mouth and letting Heeseung in. The words melt into his ears like hot wax, warming him all over. Even though his emotions are going haywire, even though he constantly feels like he’s on the brink of tears as of late, he doesn’t want to stop. The one thing that he hasn’t had in such a long time is Heeseung’s cock inside of him, opening him up and claiming him from the inside out.
He’s helplessly grinding himself on to Heeseung now, desperate for some sort of friction. Heeseung notices, pulling out of the kiss to flip them over and gently lay Jake down across the blanket beneath them. He’s careful, putting his hand under Jake’s head to stop him from hitting the ground. He takes his shirt off and bundles it into a makeshift pillow for Jake. It’s soft and it smells like the man above him. When Jake meets eyes with Heeseung, he sees exactly what he’s always wanted.
His entire world at the center of the universe. Heeseung looks beautiful, even in the dark where Jake can barely see his face. He can see the stars behind him, shining brightly on the brightest star. He can make out the way Heeseung’s eyes are hooded and his ears are flushed. Jake’s eyes roam over the hard planes of Heeseung’s abs, over his nipples and down his happy trail that leads to the inside of his pants.
Heeseung leans down, kissing Jake on the lips before he moves down his neck and sucks a hickey into the tender skin. Jake knows what this is, knows that regardless of what Heeseung says, he’s extremely possessive and easily gets jealous. This is him staking his claim on a part of Jake that everyone—including his parents—would be able to see come tomorrow.
He sucks hard enough that it hurts, bites deep enough that Jake is momentarily afraid that it will draw blood, but he knows that even if that blood spills, Heeseung would clean it up for him. His tongue is hot and wet as it laves over the mark, and Jake wants to feel it somewhere else.
“Heeseung,” he moans, hands coming up to tug at the dark strands of Heeseung’s hair. “Eat me out, please eat my pussy.”
Heeseung groans loudly against his neck, biting on the skin one more time before he pulls away. “You have such great manners, baby. How could I say no when you ask so nicely?”
Jake flushes all the way down to his chest, suddenly bashful at the praise. Heeseung knows the exact way to push all of the correct buttons, knows exactly how to get him riled up. The arousal that had been dormant in his lower belly flares up and he clenches his thighs—he tries to, but Heeseung’s body is in between them, keeping them open.
“If you can be a good boy for me, I’ll give you whatever you want, sweetheart,” Heeseung whispers, kissing Jake’s lips again and moving his hand down Jake’s body. He forgoes taking off Jake’s shirt and instead slips his hand into his pajama pants, undoing the tie in the front and pulling them down. Jake blushes as he remembers that he didn’t put on any panties because he typically doesn’t really like sleeping in them. Heeseung knows this about him, and it shows in the way that surprise doesn’t even cross his features.
“So easy for me, right Yunnie? Always desperate for my cock,” he says, hand trailing down until he’s cupping Jake’s heat.
“I want it, Hee. Miss you,” Jake says, voice wobbly and tears brimming at his eyes.
“Poor baby. I’ve been neglecting you. I’m sorry sweet thing,” Heeseung replies, leaning down and kissing Jake just as his fingers rub across Jake’s folds. He collects the wetness there, the wetness that has been pooling ever since they started kissing. Heeseung lets out a sigh as he pulls his fingers out of Jake’s pants and brings his fingers up to his mouth. Jake watches as Heeseung’s tongue darts out and licks all of the slick off of the digits, leaving them shiny with his spit.
Heeseung laps at his fingers like a starved man, and then he’s shoving his hand back into Jake’s pants and between his legs. He rubs over Jake’s cunt again before he pushes his middle and ring fingers inside of Jake. It takes him by surprise, causing him to moan loudly at the feeling. It’s not like it's unfamiliar, he’s masturbated plenty of times to photos, texts and phone calls from Heeseung, but it’s been so long since Heeseung has fingered him that it feels brand new.
Heeseung pumps his fingers in and out, using the heel of his hand to nudge against Jake’s clit. It feels infinitely better than when Jake does it for himself, so he allows his legs to fall completely open, making more room for the man in between them.
“So wet for me, baby. I want a taste,” Heeseung says, pulling his fingers out again— he loves teasing Jake—and bringing them back up to his lips. He runs them across his plush bottom lip, leaving a shiny trail of slick in his wake. He teases them against the opening of his mouth before he’s putting them in and moaning at the taste of Jake on his fingertips.
Jake whines out, desperate for more. He attempts bucking his hips up, but Heeseung only tuts in disapproval. “What happened to being good?”
“You’re being mean,” Jake says, a tear falling from his eye that Heeseung wastes no time to wipe away. “Please don’t tease me,” he adds for good measure, knowing that Heeseung likes it whenever he begs.
“I just want to play with my baby. I promise I’ll give you what you want after I’m done,” Heeseung replies, and Jake can’t deny him, not when they’re like this. He nods as a response, relaxing his hips and allowing Heeseung to do whatever it is he pleases. His boyfriend smiles and pecks his lips sweetly. His fingers find their way back into Jake’s pussy at the same time that he brings his other hand to roam around under Jake’s shirt.
He pushes the fabric up until it’s all bunched up under Jake’s armpits, but then huffs and pulls the hoodie off all together. As he throws it in the dirt next to them, Jake is promptly reminded that they’re in the middle of the forest by the breeze that blows through them. Here he and Heeseung are, both shirtless and Jake’s pants pulled halfway down his thighs. Heeseung’s fingers are so deep in him that he can basically feel them in his throat, and he’s thumbing over Jake’s hard nipple with his other hand. Goosebumps bloom across Jake’s skin—someone, anyone, could find them here like this, and yet he doesn’t care.
He only feels as if it would be a testament of his love to Heeseung. Everyone would know who he belongs to. The thought of it all only makes him wetter, the loud squelch of Heeseung’s fingers moving in and out of him more than enough to have a pink flush settling on his cheeks. Heeseung’s warm hand cups the entirety of his left pec and squeezes it in his hand.
“Love your tits, baby,” Heeseung groans, lips latching on to Jake’s nipple. His hot tongue swirls around it, and Jake lets out a loud moan, arching his chest closer to Heeseung. It’s embarrassing, but he likes Heeseung’s dirty talk more than anything, and he likes the feel of his lips on his body, too.
“Hee…” Jake moans, closing his eyes and bringing a hand up to his hair. He holds Heeseung there, moaning louder each time that Heeseung’s tongue flicks over the sensitive bud. At the same time, Heeseung is slowly stretching Jake open, adding another finger as he buries his hand in deeper.
Heeseung presses his body against Jake’s, purposefully grinding his hard on into his thigh. “Do you see what you do to me? Do you feel how hard I am?” He asks, breath ghosting over Jake’s nipple. “That’s all for you, baby. Only you.”
“Please,” Jake begs, clenching his eyes closed. He wants to feel the heat of Heeseung’s cock pushing inside of him, wants it to burn a brand all over. His eyes are glossed over, and Heeseung kisses the tears right as he pulls his fingers out slowly. He seems a little more eager and less open to teasing now, especially with the way his cock is straining in his pants. He kisses down Jake’s body before he’s level with his cunt.
Heeseung’s hands find both of his thighs, pulling them until they’re each resting on his shoulders. He blows hot air over Jake’s pussy and wastes no time diving in. His tongue licks all the way up his cunt, wetting it before he dips it inside of his folds. Jake moans when he feels the vibrations of Heeseung humming at the taste, his nose hitting his clit with every jab inside.
Jake brings his hands down to Heeseung’s hair again, uncaring of the amount of times he’s pulled on those strands by now. He pushes Heeseung’s face closer to his heat, arching his back when Heeseung squeezes one of his thighs and aids his attempts by pulling Jake even closer. Jake can’t control it as he grinds his body against Heeseung’s face, trying to take in even more of his tongue.
He’s already on edge from all of the foreplay Heeseung had been doing to him, so it’s no surprise that his orgasm is already approaching him. There’s something about the feeling of Heeseung’s tongue, dragging across his walls and leaving a trail of his spit behind, almost like he’s claiming Jake in a different way.
Either way, it feels amazing, Heeseung has always been good at giving head. He has no shame when he does it, and actually enjoys himself. Jake knows that he enjoys it based on the enthusiasm he gives every single time.
“Heeseung,” Jake sighs out, mouth dropping open in a silent moan as Heeseung slurps up every last bit of his juices. “I’m close, please don’t stop.”
Jake’s orgasm comes like a wave, starting in his lower body and only building up the climax. Just as he’s at the peak where the wave is about to break, Heeseung stops.
“No!” Jake cries, real tears falling down his face now. Heeseung shushes him, but makes no attempt to move away from his pussy.
“I’m sorry, baby. Shhh, I promise I’ll make it better,” Heeseung says, immediately taking his clit into his mouth and lightly sucking on it. His fingers break through Jake’s folds again, and he spears them inside with no care to being gentle.
With the quick change of emotions and their vulnerable conversation from before, Jake wastes no time reaching his peak once again. His orgasm washes over him, causing his entire body to still as he lets out a cry again. His toes curl as Heeseung doesn’t let up on the stimulation of both his g-spot and his clit. Jake can’t control his body, and before he knows it, he’s squirting all over Heeseung’s face and fingers. Jake momentarily blacks out, seeing stars from behind his eyelids as Heeseung drinks in his release.
The intensity of his orgasm has him feeling exhausted, but he knows that they’re far from done.
“That was so fucking hot, Jaeyun. Fuck, good boy,” Heeseung says, coming back up and connecting their lips. Jake barely has the energy to kiss back, but he gives it his all. He knows that Heeseung won’t stop, and he knows that Heeseung knows that Jake doesn’t want him to. He likes feeling used, especially if the only person who gets to use him is Heeseung.
When his boyfriend pulls away his brain finally registers what Heeseung has called him, and he visibly preens. Heeseung smiles too, his hand coming up to move a few stray strands of hair out of Jake’s eyes. He knows the effect that his words and actions have on Jake, how deep that desire to please runs.
“That’s right, baby. You’re my good boy,” Heeseung says, running an affectionate hand through Jake’s hair. Jake’s smile only grows wider as he nuzzles his head against Heeseung’s gentle hand, content to stay like this, but there’s still something close to desire burning deep in his belly. Heeseung must feel it too since he bends down to kiss Jake on the lips for the hundredth time tonight.
Jake languidly opens his mouth and allows Heeseung to lick inside of it with no qualms, tasting himself on his boyfriend’s tongue. When they kiss lazily like this, Jake can’t help but to grow even hornier. He and Heeseung both know that they belong to each other, but for some reason, there’s something so primal about this. There’s something so primal about Jake laying there with his mouth open, letting Heeseung take what he wants. He wholeheartedly trusts his boyfriend and knows that he would never hurt Jake. That’s why he lets Heeseung in, why he’s always so easy when it comes to the man on top of him.
Heeseung stops kissing him in favor of pulling his pants off alongside his boxers. Jake opens his eyes slowly and watches as Heeseung’s cock bobs out. He’s so hard, the veins protruding through it and leading to the angry, red and leaking tip. He watches as Heeseung brings a hand to the shaft and pumps it a few times, groaning quietly at the feeling of finally getting some sort of stimulation.
“You still with me?” Heeseung gently asks. Jake’s eyes follow as he swirls his thumb over the slit in his cock and spreads the precum all around the head.
Jake spreads his legs, trailing his hand down his body and holding his cunt open with two fingers. “I need it.”
Heeseung’s eyes are dark as he stares down at Jake’s open pussy, lust pooling in his brown irises. He doesn’t say anything as he guides the tip to Jake’s hold, picking up some of his slick with it. It looks heavy in his hand, girthy and long as it sits at his opening. Heeseung is gentle as he works the fat head through Jake’s folds, slowly pushing in and groaning lowly when he’s enveloped in the warmth of Jake’s cunt.
Jake, on the other hand, feels tears brim his eyes as he forces himself to breathe through it. It doesn’t hurt—Heeseung had done a good amount of prep—but it’s still a lot. It’s always so much when they have sex. Heeseung is so big that Jake can feel it in his brain and it clouds over his thinking. His only reactions are those that come from Heeseung pushing in further. He can’t think of anything beyond the man who is claiming his body, the only person he’s ever had inside of him and the only one that he ever wants inside of him.
“So good, so tight. Made for me,” Heeseung mindlessly says, stilling inside of Jake in order to catch his bearings.
“Only for you. It’s yours,” Jake responds, just as mindless. Heeseung still doesn’t move his hips, not yet. Jake can feel his cock pulsing inside of him, stretching him open so wide that it makes his head spin.
Heeseung smirks, licking at the corner of Jake’s mouth before they’re kissing again. As soon as their lips make contact, Heeseung begins moving his hips. It feels too good, the heat of his cock and the way it’s forcing itself inside of Jake, his mouth opens into another moan, and he breathes out moan after moan as Heeseung speeds up his pace.
With the way Heeseung is pressing down into him, Jake can feel the hard dirt beneath his back. He can smell the water from the stream, the grass and trees surrounding them. He feels ground, so close to the earth, but when he looks up, he sees Heeseung with the stars and the sky as his background. He sees life itself reflected in Heeseung. He feels like he’s floating with nothing to tether him to the real world, but it doesn’t matter, not when he’s got Heeseung there to always bring him back.
“Good boy, good puppy,” Heeseung groans, deep and guttural in his ear. His cheeks flush a deep red and Jake is thankful that it’s dark around them. They disturb the quiet of the night with their love making, the sound of Heeseung’s cock moving in and out of Jake’s cunt feels like it’s echoing around them. They’re both moaning in unison, creating even more noise in the otherwise quiet forest. Jake is glad that they’re so far out, mainly because he’s positive that nobody can really hear them.
“More, more,” Jake says, not sure what exactly he’s asking for, but Heeseung delivers anyways. He takes Jake’s legs and hikes them up so that they’re resting on his shoulders and then places his hand on Jake’s stomach to keep him laying flat. He drives his hips in aggressively, throwing his head back and groaning lowly at the feeling.
He’s so much deeper like this, the tip of his cock kissing Jake’s cervix with each thrust. Jake is so sensitive from his prior orgasm, so everything feels like a lot, but he doesn’t want it to stop. He wants Heeseung inside of him as deep as possible, he wants to remember this moment for the rest of their lives.
“Look at you, so pliant for me. I love when you’re like this, baby. Letting me take what I want,” Heeseung mumbles, his hand moving from Jake’s stomach back up to his chest where he rolls one of Jake’s nipples between his fingers. He leans down then, hips never faltering. “Who does this cunt belong to?”
By now, tears are fully running down Jake’s face. He isn’t sure why his reaction is to cry, but he knows that he can’t stop it. He just feels so close to Heeseung like this, so vulnerable. He feels full of trust, too, and that trust is something special to him—special to the both of them.
“‘S yours,” Jake babbles, too lost in the pleasure to form full sentences. His words feel like they’re stuck in his throat and his tongue feels heavy.
“Perfect puppy. Fucked dumb, but still responding. You’re such a good boy,” Heeseung says again, slowing his pace only to drive his hips deeper and make sure that Jake feels every bit of it.
And he does. He thinks that he’ll still feel Heeseung dick when he wakes up tomorrow and won’t be twenty minutes away from him anymore. The thought is so harrowing, but he really doesn’t want to think about it while they’re doing this right now.
As if to pull him out of his mind, Heeseung’s hand trails down to where they’re connected and starts playing with Jake’s clit. He knows that Heeseung is trying to make him orgasm again, but Jake doesn’t want him to focus on that right now. Jake’s main priority is to make Heeseung orgasm. With that thought in mind, he swats his boyfriend’s hand away—even if his movements did feel good—and starts moving his hips to meet his boyfriend half way.
“Hee—” Jake cuts himself off with a loud moan when Heeseung hits just the right spot inside of him. He clutches the blanket beneath him in an attempt to ground himself. “Wan’ it. Inside.”
Heeseung giggles like he isn’t fucking Jake within an inch of his life. “Does my baby want my come? Is that it?”
Jake wordlessly nods, tongue lolling out of his mouth like he really is nothing more than Heeseung’s mindless puppy.
“Use your words, baby,” Heeseung gently reminds him.
“Want your come. Please.”
Heeseung groans at the words, and then he’s picking up the pace again. He’s merciless as he plays with Jake’s clit and brings them to their orgasms together. Jake feels the same intensity he did before, tensing around Heeseung’s cock before he loudly lets out a moan when the tip of it pushes against his g-spot. His orgasm washes over him at the same time that he feels Heeseung stilling and filling him up with his come.
They’ve done this before—fucking without a condom—but now that they’re going to be apart, it feels much more sacred. Jake doesn’t want to let any of it drip out of him. He wants to keep Heeseung inside for as long as he can.
“Don’t pull out,” he tiredly mumbles, catching his breath as Heeseung finally lets his legs down.
“Wasn’t planning on it,” Heeseung responds, voice sounding way too cheeky. Jake lightly slaps at his chest as he maneuvers them so that they’re spooning. They can still kind of see the stars like this, but definitely not as good as they’d be able to if they laid on their backs. Jake doesn’t care though, all he wants is to be close to Heeseung.
They stay like that for a while, silent as they bask in each other’s presence. As much as Jake loves talking to Heeseung, he also always enjoys being able to sit in silence with him. It’s never weird or awkward, they can take their own time to recoup, but still be in each other’s presence while they do it.
Heeseung shifts them around then, claiming that his back hurts from laying down on the forest floor. He moves until he’s sitting, and then he pulls Jake into his lap, his cock sliding back in effortlessly. Jake sighs as the feeling, leaning back until his back hits Heeseung’s chest. It’s comfortable, whenever they’ve had the opportunities to do it, Jake loves cockwarming Heeseung. It feels like they’re truly connected that way, physically and emotionally.
It’s quiet around them, the only sounds coming from the stream and late night birds or owls. Jake watches the stars, watches how they twinkle in the dark night sky. There aren’t many clouds out, so they really have the perfect view. Heeseung is resting his chin on Jake’s shoulder, his hands circling his waist and squeezing it rhythmically.
Jake knows that they should probably pack up and start heading back to his house, but he can’t help but to feel insatiable. He still wants Heeseung, still wants more. Even the thought of not feeling Heeseung inside of him for however long makes him want to be sick.
He slowly begins moving his hips, placing his hands on Heeseung’s thighs and using his hold as leverage to ride him. He leans forward a bit, showing off his ass as he lets out a high pitch moan when Heeseung’s cock jabs at that sweet bundle of nerves.
“Baby,” Heeseung groans, tightening his hold on Jake’s waist.
“I need to feel you one more time, please,” Jake says, letting out a breath as he sits on Heeseung’s cock and feels it deep inside of him. He guides Heeseung’s hand to where the tip is bulging through his stomach. His boyfriend moans, bucking his hips up to meet Jake’s own efforts.
“You’re doing such a good job, sweetheart. Just like that,” Heeseung says, helping Jake by pulling him down onto his cock. “You’re making me feel so good. You’re so perfect.”
Jake cries out, the praise shooting straight to his pussy. He loves it when Heeseung talks him through it during sex, loves hearing his sweet, honey voice and feeling his thick cock fucking inside of him at the same time. He puts more effort into the way he’s bouncing on Heeseung’s cock, moaning when his boyfriend’s fingers find their way to his clit.
“Keep going, baby,” Heeseung groans, right in Jake’s ear. “So tight and warm around me.”
Jake does as he’s told, being a good boy like always. His bounces get a bit more eager, faster as he’s encouraged by the sound of Heeseung’s moans. He’s maybe a little too eager, because on one of the thrusts he raises himself too high and Heeseung’s cock slips out, followed by a drop of his come.
The tears fall from Jake’s eyes before he’s even fully comprehended what has happened. He feels so empty without Heeseung inside of him, and the feeling of his come leaking out too is enough to have him desperately rutting back in an attempt to get Heeseung’s cock inside of him again. It slips between them, drops of come making a mess of Jake’s ass cheeks.
“Heeseung,” he cries out, eyes blurred by tears and face feeling hot and sticky.
“Relax, baby. Take a deep breath,” Heeseung whispers, bringing a hand up to Jake’s ass and using it to knead at the flesh of his cheeks. “Lean back for me,” he says, using his other hand to guide his cock back towards Jake’s cunt.
Jake sniffles, holding on to Heeseung tighter as he follows his instructions and slowly lowers himself until he can feel the tip kissing his folds. Heeseung runs it through the mess of his come leaking out, collecting all of it on the head of his cock so he can fuck it back into Jake.
“There you go, lovely. So good for me. Now sit on my cock, sweet boy.”
Jake does, moaning at the feeling of Heeseung’s cock breaching him once again. It fits perfectly, like it belongs inside of him—which Jake would argue that it does. His mouth falls open in a silent moan, but Heeseung doesn’t care about being very quiet. He breathes out a low groan, and then does again and again as he moves his hips to fuck Jake’s cunt.
Jake doesn’t want him doing all of the work though, so he lifts himself up again and gets back to his pace from before, bouncing in Heeseung lap like there’s no tomorrow. He throws his head back, body grinding against Heeseung’s.
He does that exact thing before his pace starts to falter and his thighs start to feel sore. “Heeseung, it hurts,” he whines, wanting his boyfriend to take control and finally make him orgasm again.
Heeseung tuts, “Come on, be a good boy. I want you to keep going.”
“Heeseung,” Jake cries, drawing out his name in an attempt to get what he wants.
Jake hears Heeseung let out a sigh before he’s gently maneuvering them so that they’re in missionary position once again. He knows that his boyfriend is soft on him and would never deny him of anything. Heeseung certainly likes to tease, but it doesn’t take much begging for Jake to get him to do what he wants.
Heeseung looks down at him, leaning down to kiss his lips as he slaps his heavy cock against Jake’s pussy. They’re a mess of wetness and come from the first round, but Jake doesn’t care. He likes it, likes the way Heeseung’s release sticks on the inside of his thighs and leaks out of his cunt as proof of what they’ve done. He likes it even more when Heeseung fucks it back into him like he does now, snapping his hips inside of Jake for the third time that night.
From there, Jake wraps his legs around Heeseung’s waist and uses his heels to push his boyfriend deeper inside of him. Heeseung groans and then settles on a pace, hips pistoning in and out of Jake. It’s clear that they’re both desperate to orgasm at this point. They don’t speak to each other, instead listening to the sound of their labored breathing and passionate fucking. Jake moans louder every time Heeseung’s balls slap against his taint from the speed in which they’re fucking. Nothing about it is gentle, but Jake doesn’t care because he’s so desperate.
“I want it,” he mindlessly babbles, throwing his head to the side as Heeseung’s cock nudges at his g-spot at the same time that he pinches Jake’s clit between his fingers. “Come inside, need it.”
“Almost there, baby. I want to feel you milking my cock,” Heeseung says.
The words are enough in combination with his thrusts and ministrations on Jake’s clit for him to feel his orgasm begin to bubble in his stomach. Tears threaten to fall from the corners of Jake’s eyes as he digs his nails into Heeseung’s back. His entire body tenses as he curls his toes and tightens around Heeseung’s cock as soon as his orgasm consumes him.
“Fuck,” Heeseung says, cock sensitive as he spills immediately after.
Jake’s orgasm is so intense once again that he can’t do anything else except lay there and try to regulate his breathing. His head is in the clouds, pussy throbbing and spasming around Heeseung who is still spilling his come deep inside of him.
They stay like that for a minute, Heeseung still inside and on top of Jake. He pulls his cock out halfway and strokes it, jerking it until more of his come floods inside of Jake. Then he pulls out completely, despite Jake’s whines, and watches as his release drips out of him. Jake spreads his legs, hand coming down to spread apart his folds in order to give Heeseung a better view of his puffy, red cunt.
Heeseung groans lowly, “Don’t do that, baby. You’ll make me want more.”
Jake smiles then, feeling dopey. “You’re insatiable.”
His boyfriend laughs. “Says you. Come on, we should clean up and get you back home.”
His words immediately put a damper on Jake’s mood, but he knows that Heeseung is right. He still can’t hide how everything really makes him feel. When he gets home he’ll have to go to sleep and wake up to say goodbye to everything here. His entire life, his love.
“Jake…” Heeseung trails off, voice sounding sorry. He has nothing to be sorry for. None of this is his fault.
“I know, let’s just go. I don’t want to fight with my parents,” Jake says, not really feeling up to anything anymore.
Heeseung sighs, but agrees nonetheless. He’s gentle as he dresses Jake back up, wrapping the blanket around him and giving him his boxer briefs so that nothing leaks out. Despite offering, Jake doesn’t want Heeseung to clean him up just yet, wants to cherish the feeling of him for as long as possible.
They’re wordless as they get back on Heeseung’s motorcycle, both clearly in their own worlds. The drive isn’t long and although the sky starts to get lighter, the sun hasn’t come up yet. He knows that his parents didn’t set their alarm until eight or nine, so figures that he’ll be in the clear.
Heeseung parks a couple of houses down from Jake’s, just like he did before. He walks Jake to the back door, and just as he’s about to kiss him goodbye, Jake pulls him into a tight hug.
“Don’t go. Not yet,” he says, voice watery as he cries into Heeseung’s chest.
“Oh, sweetheart. I’m right here,” Heeseung replies, kissing the crown of Jake’s head as he holds him in his arms. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m a phone call or text away. I promise you that I’ll always be here.”
“Come inside,” Jake offers. He’s snuck Heeseung into their house before, but he got caught which only added to the number of reasons why his parents hated Heeseung. He doesn’t care though, doesn’t want to let go yet.
“I shouldn’t. If your parents find us…”
“Please,” he begs, not waiting for a response as he pulls Heeseung in behind him. It seems like, similar to how he has no resolve when it comes to Heeseung, Heeseung also has no resolve when it comes to Jake. He only sighs, but doesn’t argue, following Jake in wordlessly.
Jake doesn’t need to say anything and neither does Heeseung. They quietly make their way up the stairs and lock themselves in Jake’s bathroom. Jake feels exhausted, closing the toilet seat and sitting on the lid as Heeseung turns on the shower.
He watches his boyfriend, watches the way he waits until the water is the perfect temperature before letting Jake even get close to it. He watches Heeseung as he slowly strips off Jake’s clothes and helps him into the shower. He watches Heeseung as he takes off his own clothes and steps in behind him.
They don’t say anything as the water cascades around them. Heeseung wordlessly shampoos Jake’s hair as well as his own before he’s moving on to wash their bodies. He doesn’t later up the loofa yet, hand instead circling at Jake’s cunt.
Jake knows that he just wants to help him clean up, wants to finger his release out of him so that Jake doesn’t have to do it himself, but his body takes it as something else. Jake turns around, looking up at Heeseung who is already staring down at him with lust filled eyes.
“One last time,” Jake breathes out, moaning when Heeseung kisses him and shoves him against the shower wall. He wastes no time as he slides inside, groaning so quietly that Jake can hardly hear it over the sound of the water.
He doesn’t say anything as he starts drilling into Jake, connecting their lips as a way to quiet him down. Neither of them last long, not like this. Their bodies rock together under the stream of water, the squelching sound loud enough that it makes Jake feel wetter.
“I love you,” Heeseung moans, grinding his hips into Jake.
Jake moans too, but it’s once again covered by Heeseung’s lips on his. The kiss is a mess, less of a kiss and more of them moaning into each other’s mouths desperately.
“I love you too,” Jake manages to get out, just before Heeseung’s cock rams into his g-spot again and again.
Their orgasms wash over them quickly, both of them coming in unison. Heeseung fills him up at the same time that Jake’s cunt suffocates his cock during his orgasm. When Heeseung lets him down, Jake can hardly stand on his own from how tired he is. He leans against the shower wall when Heeseung takes his time to clean all of the come out for him, apologizing every time that Jake whines from the sensitivity.
When they get out of the shower, Heeseung does Jake’s skincare for him and helps him brush his teeth too. Jake is like a walking zombie through all of it, far too exhausted to do anything to help. He just clings on to Heeseung, desperate not to let him go.
But the time eventually comes. Jake knows that Heeseung should sneak out before his parents wake up. He can see that the sun is rising through the window, indicating that their time spent together is close to over.
Heeseung tucks Jake into bed then, pushing his hair out of his eyes. Jake can hardly keep them open, but he registers Heeseung leaning down and placing a kiss on his forehead. It’s reassuring, he thinks. Nothing between them will change.
There isn’t one obstacle that they can’t get over, not if they’re together. It’ll only be for a year, and then Heeseung will come meet him in the city. They’ll get their own place together, start a new life together.
It all sounds like a dream, as well as the perfect plan.
“Sleep well, sweet boy. I love you,” Heeseung whispers, kissing Jake’s lips. “You’ll do amazing things.”
Jake smiles to himself, getting cozier under the covers. “I love you too, Heeseung. Love you,” he sleepily mumbles.
There’s something that falls on his face, something wet. His sleepy brain tells him that he’s imagining it, but something else tells Jake that Heeseung might be crying. He doesn’t have enough energy to open his eyes and check.
“Stay until I fall asleep,” he says, moving over and making space for his boyfriend.
Heeseung doesn’t argue, getting in the bed next to Jake and holding him in his arms.
“I love you,” he repeats.
Jake giggles to himself, thinking that maybe Heeseung forgot that he already said that. “You’re silly, but I love you too.”
Heeseung doesn’t answer, but he kisses Jake’s cheek and that’s the last thing that Jake remembers before he promptly falls asleep.
🩷