Chapter 1: Recovered Vlogs from Kale Vandelay: “Zanzo’s Ideas”
Chapter Text
Subject: Read this before I come down there and strangle you!!
From: MrCortado@Vandelay
To: Zanzoooooo@Vandelay
Zanzo.
Fellow employee.
Person who I pay to come up with ideas to keep my company afloat.
Remember that “genius” idea you had about the alien DNA in the eye you tried to pitch me? Well I think you left out the part where you were plagiarizing a piece of already existing piece of technology made by FUCKING TRANSTAR!! >:(
Even if by some miracle your little “brilliant idea” made it past those hair strands of yours, do you know what would happen? Those Yu fuckers would’ve sued us into a fucking crater!
I don’t know what part of your ass you pulled the “alien DNA” thing from, and I have a feeling those brothers would be pretty insulted at the idea that their big cash cow invention is made from something that doesn’t FUCKING EXIST!!
Pull this shit again, I will be more than happy to let Quality Assurance deal with you!
Reply Message Below////////
From: [email protected]
Sorry.
Subject: Better ideas
From: [email protected]
Hey, Boss!
I took your words from last week into consideration. I read you loud and clear that we want to stay under TranStar’s legal radar. And I’ve thought of some actual original ideas to bring to the table this week.
My ideas:
A deployable turret that can fold into a box
(Scare the shit out of intruders with a little surprise)
Flying drones shaped like boxes
(assign them as doctors, engineers, and scientists so we can start cutting out the useless human employees we still have on this island)
An eye scope helmet thing that scans an object and tells you what it’s made of.
(I always forget what materials we are using to make our robots. Should help me remember)
A gun that shoots glue. We could use it to put out fires and create makeshift staircases
(my robots keep complaining about needing stairs to reach high things or certain floors)
Glass that can trick people into thinking they're somewhere else.
(I really want to pretend my sleeping quarters are on a sandy beach somewhere. Or at the top of a high mountain.)
Again, no need to praise me this time. I’ll get started on these ideas right away as soon as I get your approval.
Reply Message Below////////
From: [email protected]
Zanzo.
Could you meet me at Production for a quick meeting?
Reply Message Below////////
From: [email protected]
Of course!
I knew you would come around to my ideas, Kale!
Just give me 30 min, and I’ll be there!
Subject: Idea
From: [email protected]
Had some recommendations for upgrading the magma generator to increase power around the island, Mr. Vandelay.
You can reject it if you want, but I’m running it by you like you asked.
Reply Message Below////////
From: [email protected]
Let me sit on it for a day or two. I’ll get back to you.
See, Zanzo? I knew you would give me a original idea eventually. Who knew all it took was you, me, and Rekka having a little chat together.
Reply Message Below////////
From: [email protected]
Of course, Mr Vandelay.
Thank you, Mr Vandelay.
Chapter 2: Recovered Emails: “Kale and TranStar” (To Be Updated)
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Subject: Big Opportunity
From: [email protected]
Hello, Mr. Yu.
I’m glad I’ve finally got a chance to email you. I would have reached out to you sooner, but my mother’s sudden decision to retire has left me with much to attend to.
Getting straight to the point, I feel now more than ever that our interests in reshaping the world have aligned. Yes, our solutions to bettering humanity differ, but I feel that if we create a beneficial relationship, we can accomplish things together that others could only dream of.
I can get into more detail over a video call if you wish. I may be occupied with Project Armstrong at this current point of time, but I have no problem scheduling a meeting at a time convenient to you.
I hope you will consider my offer. I can only think of good reasons as to what me, you, and your brother can do together.
Reply Message Below////////
From: [email protected]
Pleasure to meet your acquaintance, Mr. Vandelay.
I congratulate you on inheriting your mother’s company. And wish her the best for me on her well-earned retirement.
I have taken into consideration your request for mutual cooperation between our two strong foundationed empires. And I cannot argue against the potential benefits from a potential partnership. But I regret to inform you that we are not prepared to establish any partnerships, contracts, mergers or otherwise with any other companies at this point in time. Especially not with the release of our Neuromods around the corner.
As a man with years of experience in the business field. From one CEO to another, I feel that you will save yourself many potential headaches in the long run by solely focusing on your Project Armstrong.
Perhaps in the future, we will find a better foundation in time to work together. But at this current point in time, all I can offer is good luck for the both of us and our respective projects.
With kindest regards, Alex Yu.
RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: Subject: Big Opportunity
Reply Message////////
From: [email protected]
Hello, Alex
Sorry for taking so long to reply. I know it has been a whole week since my last email, but I wanted to check in.
I hope it has become evident by now that because of my ability to send so many emails in such a short amount of time while preparing for my Armstrong launch, you will see how I am a capable worker and a very valuable potential partner to work alongside with.
Please contact me again soon so that me and my Vandelay know when we will be working together.
Kindest regards, Kale Vandelay.
Chapter 3: Recovered Email: “Kale and KASMA” (To Be Updated)
Chapter Text
Subject: Big Opportunity
From: [email protected]
Hello, Mr. Singhapat
I’m glad I’ve finally got a chance to email you. I would have reached out to you sooner, but my mother’s sudden decision to retire has left me with much to attend to.
Getting straight to the point, I feel now more than ever that our interests in reshaping the world have aligned. Yes, our solutions to bettering humanity differ, but I feel that if we create a beneficial relationship, we can accomplish things together that others could only dream of.
I can get into more detail over a video call if you wish. I may be occupied with Project Armstrong at this current point of time, but I have no problem scheduling a meeting at a time convenient to you.
I hope you will consider my offer. I can only think of good reasons as to what me, you, and your team can do together.