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“You’re completely crazy, I hope you know that.” Crosshair said when his twin had finished explaining his plan.
“Unless you have some miracle idea to get us out of here, I suggest we use my plan.” Tech retorted, typing rapidly on his datapad.
“Your plan? The plan to jump in the water, wait for one of those sea creatures to find us palatable, get swallowed by one of those creatures, let them carry us through that underwater tunnel, and rip them open when we get where we want to go. That plan?”
“Yes, Crosshair, that plan.”
“You’re completely crazy.”
“Unless you’ve been hiding from me your ability to hold your breath for over 10 minutes while swimming extremely fast, this plan is our only way out.”
Crosshair swore but looked at their situation again.
The Bad Batch’s mission of the day was to locate and infiltrate a Separatist base and then pass this information to the Jedi, who could then deploy special forces there to deal with this Separatist threat.
Well, so far, nothing too extraordinary. This wasn’t the first time the Bad Batch had carried out this kind of reconnaissance mission, and even if it wasn’t their preferred practice, they were used to it.
To complicate matters a bit, this base was located on an aquatic world, with only a few scattered islands. The Separatist base was located on one of these islands. To approach this island undetected, Clone Force 99 had been forced to land on another island dozens of kilometers away, travel part of the distance by boat, and for the last few kilometers, they had to swim there. Luckily, they didn't actually have to swim to get there and were aided by small machines that Tech had improved, of course.
These machines were used to pull a human underwater, the human holding onto handles and letting themselves be pulled by the machine powered by a powerful propeller. Tech had tweaked these existing machines a bit to make them faster and a little more comfortable, but it still took the Bad Batch nearly an hour to arrive near the Separatist base.
Hunter and Wrecker would go to one side of the island while Tech and Crosshair would take care of the other. Echo, on the other hand, had stayed aboard the Marauder not only because someone had to be able to save their shebs and evacuate them in a hurry in case of emergency, but mainly because he couldn’t really swim. Obviously, his prosthetics were all waterproof, but they were heavy and unlike organic matter, wouldn’t float when submerged in water. In a word, his prosthetics would sink Echo at the speed of a pebble. But even without talking about that, Echo couldn’t hold his breath like the others did and swimming without holding his breath was almost impossible for him. He could do it for short distances but afterward, his diaphragmatic pacemaker would start to panic and send emergency signals, which interfered with the functioning of his cardiac pacemaker.
Anyway, all that to say, Echo would be waiting for them aboard the Marauder. That didn’t mean he was completely isolated from the mission, though, as he remained connected to their comm channel.
So, he had followed when Hunter and Wrecker arrived safely on the island and had carried out the necessary scans, before moving away to wait for the other two before returning to the boat.
Echo had also followed when Tech and Crosshair hadn’t been so lucky and had been spotted by a droid patrol. It wasn’t a big deal in itself; there weren’t even 20 droids and the twins had no trouble taking them out. No, the problem was that while fighting those droids, they’d got stuck in some kind of cavern which the only remaining access was an underwater tunnel several hundred meters long located several meters below the surface.
“So? Have you discovered a pair of gills? If not, which I highly doubt, we’re going to have to use my plan. And I suggest you make a quick decision. Our presence hasn’t gone unnoticed, and the cave-in that allowed us to evade the first droid patrol won’t hold back reinforcements for long. Factoring in the time it will take these creatures to swallow and transport us, we need to be out of this cavern in less than-”
“Okay, okay, Tech.” Crosshair stopped. “We’ll use your substitute of a plan.”
“Excuse you, my plan is much more than a substitute.” Tech balked, pushing his glasses up his nose. “And I don’t hear you suggesting an alternative, so I’d ask you to keep your derogatory comments to yourself.”
Crosshair mumbled something that Tech didn’t bother to decipher but stopped protesting. “Okay. So, how do we do it?”
“First, we need to attract these animals to us. To do this, I’ll emit vibrational waves that should attract their attention. While I do this, contact the others and inform them of our situation.”
Crosshair nodded and as Tech approached the water with his datapad, opened their comm channel. “Okay, we have a plan. Or rather, Tech has a plan and I don’t, so I’m going to have to follow it.” The sniper mocked.
“Crosshair, if you disparage my plan one more time-” Tech began.
“It's okay, Techie, relax. I was just saying that-”
“Boys, this really isn’t the time to be arguing.” Hunter refocused them.
The twins stared at each other, and Crosshair stuck his tongue out at his brother before replying. But he didn’t have time to say anything before Echo intervened. “Cross, stop sticking your tongue out at your brother.” The ARC said sternly.
“I didn’t do anything!” The sniper said indignantly.
“Crosshair Batcher.” Echo reprimanded.
“Ooh, he full-named you, it sucks for you, little brother.” Wrecker laughed.
“Shut up, Wrecker.” Crosshair muttered.
“Crosshair, I still haven’t heard an apology.” Echo continued.
Crosshair looked up at his brother, and even though Tech hadn’t moved, he could feel his smugness emanating from him in waves. But he knew Echo wouldn’t leave him alone until he apologized.
“Sorry.” He mumbled. It was the most he could do.
“I accept your apology.” Tech replied neutrally, even though Crosshair knew he had a small, victorious smile on his face beneath his helmet. Little shit. The sniper thought. But with Echo still online, he didn’t say anything out loud.
“Thank you. Now Crosshair, tell us your plan to get out of this.”
“Basically, getting swallowed by giant jellyfish and using them as a train.”
There was a long silence.
“Okay? A little more detail please, Cross?” Hunter asked, sounding completely lost.
“The only way out is an underwater tunnel several hundred meters long, so we can’t swim out. Tech wants us to use the sea creatures here. Their stomachs are partly filled with air, and with our filters, we should be able to breathe that air until we get out. Their stomachs are expandable, so we shouldn’t have any trouble getting in. Tech is calling them to us, but they don’t like tight spaces, so they’ll want to get out as quickly as possible. And once we’re through the tunnel, we’ll be able to get out and surface.”
“So, you want to get swallowed by giant jellyfish and use them as transportation.” Hunter summarized.
“That’s exactly what I said, yes.” Crosshair said, slightly annoyed at repeating himself.
“Yikes.” Echo commented. “Well, may the Force be with you, or whatever.”
Crosshair wanted to make a cutting remark like, ‘Thanks for the comment, very helpful’ but he stopped when he saw a gelatinous mass emerge from the water, followed by another.
“And here’s our way out! Tech exclaimed, sounding almost excited.
Seriously, what was his problem?
“We’ll need it.” Crosshair simply said into his earpiece.
“Good luck. Let us know as soon as you’re out.” Hunter encouraged.
“And if you don’t hear from us in three hours, come get our bodies.” Crosshair sighed dramatically before disconnecting the connection.
“Crosshair, stop whining, there is no reason to be so dramatic.” Tech asked, rolling his eyes, already stuffing his gear into his waterproof backpack, locking his precious datapad in a separate pouch so he could keep it with him.
“You want me to get swallowed by a shapeless gelatinous mass!” The sniper protested, preparing to dive anyway.
Tech didn’t respond but threw something slimy at Crosshair, the unknown material landing on his helmet visor. “Hey, what the kark is that?!”
“A seaweed they love. If you wrap it around your torso, they will swallow you whole.”
“Or cut me into a thousand pieces!”
“These creatures don’t have teeth, Crosshair.” Tech replied, sounding like someone explaining the same thing 50 times to a stubborn 5-year-old. “They use the enzymes and juices in their stomachs to kill and digest their prey.”
“Oh, they use what’s in their stomachs to kill. And remind me where are we going?”
“These jellyfish would take days to kill us. Even if it took us 30 minutes to get through this tunnel, only the paint on our armor would be damaged. However, I advise you to make sure your skin doesn’t protrude from your armor, as it could be damaged by the creatures’ digestive enzymes.”
“Oh, now I can relax.” Crosshair snarked.
Tech chose not to answer and simply jumped into the water after a final check of his equipment, having also wrapped some seaweed around his torso.
And even though it disgusted him, Crosshair certainly wasn’t going to let his twin get into this mess without him, so he jumped in as well.
Soon enough, one of the creatures approached him, and before he could react, Crosshair was swallowed whole by the huge jellyfish. He was tossed around for a few dozen seconds before he stopped moving, seemingly settled in the creature’s stomach. Crosshair honestly didn’t know which way he was facing, or whether his head was up or down, but truth be told, he couldn’t really move, so even if he had known which way he was facing, it wouldn’t have helped him much.
He could, however, turn on his comm. “Tech, do you read me?”
“I hear you, Crosshair.” Tech replied quickly. His voice was a little distorted but nothing too much and Crosshair heard him perfectly.
“Did you manage to get swallowed?” The sniper then asked.
“Affirmative. The position is not the most pleasant but will be satisfactory for our journey.”
“How will we know when we’re out?”
“I’m carefully monitoring our coordinates and altitude. I’ll be able to identify the moment when we can exit here and return to the ocean surface.”
“Of course you’re watching that.” Crosshair muttered.
“Did you know that these creatures normally feed exclusively on algae and small fish? However, their anatomy is adaptable to allow them to consume much larger prey, such as ourselves.”
Tech was currently in the stomach of a creature he had learned the existence less than a week ago, but nothing seemed to bother him, and he continued to info dumping about anything and everything as if everything was fine.
Crosshair only responded with a grunt, but he knew that was enough for Tech.
The jellyfish ride lasted about fifteen minutes, and just as Crosshair was starting to have trouble breathing, Tech spoke again. “We have just left the underwater tunnel and have begun our ascent to the surface. In a few seconds, we will be able to leave our hosts and swim back up.”
“And how do you expect us to get out of here?” Crosshair asked, realizing he hadn't asked that question before.
But Tech had already thought of that, as usual. “We’ll have to cut our way out. Their skin is thin enough that we can pierce it from our position with a simple vibroblade. Fortunately, these organisms are capable of regenerating their cells after injury, so they won’t succumb to our extraction. Normally.”
Crosshair grumbled but didn’t answer clearly, which Tech was content with.
A few seconds later, Tech gave the signal, and Crosshair cut a hole in the creature’s abdomen. A flurry of bubbles and confusion followed, but by observing the bubbles, Crosshair was able to identify the way up and was able to surface in a few more seconds.
When he broke the surface of the water, Crosshair took a deep breath. Oxygen had become scarce towards the end of the journey. The sniper turned to look for Tech, and fortunately, he soon came up as well.
“You okay, Tech?” He asked, moving closer to his brother.
“Impeccably. However, I think I’ll let myself be tempted by a real water shower and not settle for a Sonic.” The engineer replied calmly.
“I’ll go first; you always spend three hours in the shower.” Crosshair teased, pushing his brother away.
Tech responded by sending a wave towards the sniper, who responded in kind.
And that’s exactly when Echo contacted them. “Tech, Crosshair, if you’re out of those creatures and playing around in the water like kids instead of warning us, I’m not going to be happy.”
“Kriff, do you have a sixth sense or something?” Crosshair grumbled.
“That’s the ori'vod sense.” The cyborg replied. “But given your answer, I conclude you got out safely.”
“Affirmative.” Tech confirmed, his datapad back in his hands. “Hunter, I sent you our coordinates. If you could come and get us, we would appreciate it.”
“We’ll be there in a few minutes.” Confirmed the tracker.
“So, how was it in the jellyfish?” Wrecker asked, sounding excited.
“Hot, wet, and pitch black.” Crosshair muttered.
“You forgot slimy and smelly.” Tech added.
“You’d better wash up before you get back on board then.” Echo warned, and Crosshair could totally imagine his pinched, disgusted expression.
“Promise, Mom.” The sniper mocked, rolling his eyes.
Echo didn’t respond but didn’t need to because Hunter and Wrecker arrived. And when he reached him, Hunter slapped the back of his younger brother’s helmet.
“Hey, what’s that for?” Crosshair complained.
“You know what it’s for.” Hunter simply replied with a shrug. “Come on, hang on, we’re going back.” He added before the sniper could reply.
Crosshair muttered under his breath but clung to his new mode of transportation. And when they were launched, he couldn’t help but take another dig at his twin. “You see Tech, I much prefer this type of transport.”
“Crosshair, the next time you make a comment about today’s methods, I’ll hide a used sock in your bunk.”
Crosshair grimaced in disgust but didn’t say anything else out loud.
The rest of the journey went smoothly, and the four batchers found their boat where they had left it. Once on the boat, it took them another hour to reach the island where the Marauder and Echo were waiting for them.
“Ah, there you are.” The cyborg said, seeing his four little brothers arrive. “I’ve installed the outdoor shower, none of you are setting foot in this ship in your condition.”
“Hey, only Tech and Crosshair got swallowed by giant jellyfish!” Wrecker protested. “Why do we all have to shower?”
“Because you’ve all been soaking in dirty, salty water for several hours. I don’t know what’s in the oceans of this planet, but I don’t want it to be on the Marauder. Go shower.” Echo demanded, adamant.
Wrecker mumbled a bit more but complied, and the four batchers headed to the side of the ship, discarding their equipment.
And as luck would have it, Crosshair and Tech ended up next for the shower. And Crosshair apparently never got tired of annoying his twin.
“Crosshair, stop throwing your dirty foam at me.” Tech complained after the third time.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Crosshair replied innocently, angling so that the stream of dirty water running from his elbow landed directly on Tech.
“Crosshair!”
The sniper wanted to respond but before he could, he was grabbed by the arms and lifted to the side, Wrecker switching positions. “There, that way it will be better.” The tallest replied.
Crosshair didn’t answer.
“How’s the shower going, boys?” Echo asked, keeping his distance.
“Good, Mom.” The four batchers replied in unison.
Echo rolled his eyes but couldn’t help but smile as well. Yes, sometimes he really did feel like the only responsible adult in the group. Because while no trooper had ever had it easy on Kamino, he knew that for the Batch, it had been even worse. So, if he could be a guiding and supportive older figure, he didn’t mind. And no, he wasn’t stupid, he knew they were being ironic when they called him ‘Mom’, but he suspected there must be some truth to it, and he was fine with that.
“Oh look, fireflies.” Hunter pointed out after a while.
Wrecker immediately turned his head in the direction indicated but Crosshair first grabbed Tech’s goggles, sticking them on his nose before turning his head towards where Hunter was pointing.
“Oh, they’re voracious fireflies. Unlike their fellow fireflies of other species, these feed on insects, often still alive. To catch them, they use the webs of certain spiders. The prey gets trapped in the webs, and the fireflies, faster than spiders, grab the prey before carrying it to their nest to devour it.” Tech rambled.
“And they don’t get caught in cobwebs?” Crosshair asked.
He wasn’t necessarily very interested in how voracious fireflies lived and hunted, but he knew how much Tech liked to talk about things that interested him.
“Before scavenging prey, fireflies coat themselves in an oily substance they secrete that makes them invulnerable to spiders’ slimy webs. I wonder if I can catch one in holo?” The engineer added, grabbing his datapad and moving closer to the small lights.
“Tech.” Echo interrupted. “The fireflies aren’t going anywhere, and they’ll still be here in 10 minutes. You can finish washing your hair and get dressed before you go exploring.”
“You’re so small that if you walk around naked as a worm in the forest the fireflies will eat you.” Crosshair sneered as he put on his blacks.
Tech didn’t answer but reluctantly put down his datapad, finishing washing his hair while watching the bright blur of fireflies.
“Echo, can we spend the night here?” Tech asked, like a 5-year-old asking to spend the night at the park because he’s having too much fun.
“No.” The cyborg replied firmly. “If we stay too long, the Seppies might spot us, and there are too many of them for us.”
“Three hours then?” Tech bargained.
“Three hours is fine. But all your things need to be packed before you go firefly hunting. I want us ready to take off at the slightest sign that we've been spotted.”
“Okay.” Tech agreed immediately, jumping into his blacks and rushing into the Marauder with his dirty armor in a bag.
In no time at all, Tech was coming back down the ramp. He stopped to give Echo a quick hug before continuing. “Thank you Echo.”
“You’re welcome, Tech.” Echo smiled, watching one of his younger brothers walk towards the fireflies with an excited look.
He then glanced at the other three and while Hunter and Wrecker were busy cleaning their armor, Crosshair was looking at Tech with the urge to do something stupid visibly showing.
“Crosshair, have you cleaned your rifle today?” He asked not wanting the sniper to bother his twin.
Crosshair froze like a child caught red-handed and shook his head at Echo.
“Come clean it up and leave your brother alone.” The cyborg urged.
The younger man didn’t answer immediately, throwing one last mischievous look at Tech, before sighing and walking back to the Marauder, grabbing his rifle and sitting cross-legged on the deck, pulling out a cleaning kit from who knew where and getting to work.
Echo checked one last time that everyone was occupied before heading back into the ship. However, something compelled him to get back out quickly, so he simply grabbed a datapad before heading out.
And he hadn’t even fully emerged yet when he saw Crosshair aiming his rifle at Tech, the latter set to simply fire a rubber bullet.
“Crosshair Batcher!” Echo reprimanded.
The sniper jumped slightly but acted as if nothing had happened, quickly placing his rifle back on his knees and continuing to clean it while sending an angelic smile to his older brother.
Echo sighed, shaking his head. He definitely couldn’t leave them alone for more than a few seconds.