Chapter Text
Eddie isn’t entirely sure why he does it. It isn’t his sort of thing. He’s never been the type to seek company like this. Even with Shannon, he wasn’t the most interested in—whatever.
That’s the past.
Now, he’s alone with a four year old in a city he’s only seen in movies, no friends, barely any family, just trying to make it through a few months at the academy. It makes sense that he needs to let loose, talk to someone. Even if it means paying $1.49 a minute.
If someone asks, Eddie can blame it on curiosity. He can say he saw an ad for a hotline and, even though he really doesn’t have the money to spare, called to see if it was real.
The line connects and Eddie inhales sharply. He looks at the website in front of him. There’s an assortment of photos. Most don’t show faces. Or at least not full ones. Eddie wonders if they’re actually the women whose names are written under each picture.
“Madeline’s Connections, Madeline speaking. How may I direct your call?” An older, raspy female voice asks.
“Uh,” Eddie pauses. He should just hang up.
“Hello?” Madeline asks again, a little less sweetly. “Is anyone there?”
“Hi,” Eddie says, so quietly he barely hears himself. “Hi,” he repeats, “I was, uh, wondering who is working today. Tonight.”
“What are you looking for?” She questions.
“Uh… what do you have?” Why is Eddie acting like he needs to pick an ice cream flavour? He’s trying to talk to a human.
“Well, I have some nice, young girls. Just legal. Or, if you like an older woman, there’s a few. We have dominant and submissive girls. Or, if women aren’t your fancy, there’s Evan.” Evan? All of the names online sound made up: Candy, Lala, Topaz, Marilyn, Diamond, etc. Not Evan.
Since Eddie clearly isn’t here for… for anything a Venus or Bambi might have to offer, he repeats Evan’s name.
The line clicks and he hears an old-fashioned dial tone, then another click. There’s a quiet moment before he hears someone take a breath.
“Hey,” a young sounding man says. “My name’s Evan, what’s yours?”
Something about his voice surprises Eddie. It’s not like Eddie expected him to be effeminate, but… he doesn’t even sound gay. Not that you can sound gay. But some guys might sound a little, y’know, light in their loafers. Evan has no accent at all. He sounds as American as, uh, something super American. Pie? Is the phrase ‘as American as pie?’
“Hello?” Evan asks. “Not sure if you heard me. My name’s Evan. What should I call you?” Eddie panics.
“John,” he says quickly. Shit. That's like the worst white man name ever. He could have at least picked something cool like Razor or Mateo.
On the other end of the line, he hears suppressed laughter.
“Is that your real name?”
“Are you allowed to ask that?” Eddie shoots back. He sighs and shakes his head. “No, obviously that’s not.”
“Mm, thought so. You can pick a different one if you want,” Evan offers. His breathing is soft and even. Eddie listens to it for a moment, thinking. Names that come to mind: Eddie, Chris, Ramon. None of those will work.
“Mundo,” he decides.
“Mundo.” It sounds like Evan is smiling. “Okay, mi mundo. What are you wearing?”
Eddie tilts his head and looks at his clothes. Gym shorts, a tank top, his gym sneakers.
“Uh, like athletic clothes. Why?” He scratches his head.
“Are you athletic?” Evan asks. “I like athletic men.”
“Oh, I play basketball, I guess. Just worked out. What about you?” Eddie shuts his laptop and places it by the foot of the bed.
Evan laughs.
“I’m wearing whatever you like. Suit, panties, nothing.”
Oh, right. That’s why Evan is asking. He’s here to… please Eddie.
“I’m, uh, not gay,” Eddie tells the voice. He crosses his legs and sits up in bed.
“That’s okay, Mundo. I can still make you feel good.”
“Sorry, uh… I mean, like, I didn’t call for sex.” Eddie covers his face with his hand. Jesus, he’s socially awkward.
“Oh, alright. Let me just…” Evan mimics a shitty zipper sound with his mouth. It makes Eddie smile. “What do you want to talk about?”
“I don’t know,” Eddie admits. “I didn’t think I’d get this far.”
Evan suppresses another laugh. Eddie can hear him shifting in a chair or something. He’s probably in a pretty similar position, sitting at home fully dressed, talking to a stranger on the phone.
“Are you, uh… actually not gay?” Evan questions. “I mean, like… did you call to… discuss that?”
“As far as I know, I’m straight. I haven’t thought too much about it, but I have a wife and kid. A son.” Eddie wishes that were true—the wife part. It’s been a while since he heard from Shannon. Hell, unless he’s cursing her name, he doesn’t even think of her much anymore. Too much going on.
“How old is your kid?”
“He’s four.” Eddie wonders if he should be telling a sex worker on the phone so much information. It’s all anonymous, so it probably doesn’t matter much. “He’s napping. Still not used to school.”
“Four. That’s a big boy.”
“Yeah, he’s grown so much. I remember, the first time I got home, I thought he was teeny. But now, he’s like… a person. So weird.” Eddie smiles, remembering how cute and small Chris was. He could barely hold his head up and loved cuddles. He still loves cuddles, but now he sits and stands and talks and even walks. “I guess that’s what happens with kids. They grow up.”
“Too true. I can’t imagine having a toddler. I forget I’m not sixteen anymore,” Evan admits.
“Am I allowed to ask how old you are?” Eddie slumps back down, relaxing again. This isn’t so bad. Evan seems nice even if it’s probably acting.
“There’s no rules to this, Mundo. As long as we’re both of age.” Evan must be trying to decide whether or not to say his age because next he adds, “How old do you want me to be?”
“Uh, I guess I don’t care. Out of school, hopefully.” Eddie swallows and takes a deep breath. “I’m 23.”
Evan makes a noise, but cuts himself off. Eddie’s sure he’s surprised.
“We’re the same, then,” he tells Eddie. “And that’s not a fib.”
“Is your name really Evan?”
“Yes.” It sounds like a lie. “But no one calls me that. Not anymore.”
“College nickname?” Eddie questions.
“No, uh… I never graduated.” Evan clears his throat. “I mean, unless you prefer I did.”
“Like I said, not looking for sex. Just… talking.” Eddie messes with his hair. “I didn’t go to college either.”
“Oh, that’s cool. What do you do?” Evan curses at himself. “Sorry, you do the asking.”
“It’s okay. I’m retired military. Now I’m…” Firefighting seems too specific. But maybe Evan isn’t even in Los Angeles. “Learning a trade.” Good. Nonspecific. “What about you?—God, I’m stupid.”
“It’s alright. This isn’t my full-time job.” Evan giggles and shifts again. “I’m a public servant.”
“Like a teacher?” Eddie giggles back. His not-sex buddy could be teaching his son. It would explain why he seemed happy to talk about Chris.
“I’m not a teacher, but that is an example of a public servant.”
God, why is this guy being vague? Well, Eddie did say he’s in trade school, so they’re both sort of dancing around answers.
“Do you like your work?” Eddie questions. “Your, uh, daytime one.”
“Yeah, I love it. It’s difficult, but… it makes me feel needed.” Evan chuckles. “I guess this does, too. Just in a different capacity.”
Needed. Eddie rarely feels that anymore. If it weren’t for Chris, he’d really have nothing. No one to love, to take care of, nothing to work for.
Eddie clears his throat. No use talking about his own shortcomings.
“Do you mind that a straight guy called you?”
“No. Gay, straight, man, woman, anything in between… I make the same amount.” Evan coughs and scratches something, probably his jaw. “Not that, uh, I don’t like—”
“It’s okay. I know I’m paying.” Eddie chuckles and rolls onto his side. “So you’re not disappointed?”
“This line is for companionship. For some, that means sex, but most people just want company,” Evan explains. He doesn’t sound judgemental in any way. “It’s all part of the job.”
“So, like, do you ever enjoy it?”
There’s a brief pause.
“I do, sometimes. I have regulars. People who call every week, sometimes even daily. Like anyone, I have favourites. But I’m not supposed to get close even if I care.” Evan sighs quietly. “I had this one regular, an old man. He liked to tell me about his husband who passed away. I liked him. When he stopped calling… I guess I should’ve minded my own business, but at least I got answers.”
“What happened?” Eddie inquires. He imagines it was something horrible.
“I called for a wellness check. He was by the phone, the sergeant said. Natural causes, 90 years old.” Evan blows air out of his mouth. “He had kids, grandkids, great-grandkids and still… he talked to me twice a week. I guess he didn’t want to burden anyone with his loneliness. Always kept a brave face.”
“You probably meant a lot to him,” Eddie says. He isn’t sure why he’s comforting his sex worker. Especially because Evan probably knows that. He makes a sort of grunt in acknowledgement.
“Then, there’s difficult people. They like certain things that I don’t, but I still talk.” Evan goes quiet and Eddie imagines he’s stopped to shrug.
“Like what? Feet?” Eddie questions. Evan laughs. He’s probably shaking his head.
“I can’t say I’m into that, but no, not feet. More like… they like to treat me like I’m young. Really young. But as long as they don’t explicitly say I’m a minor, it’s legal. Or, like, one guy had a thing for animals. Not calling me kitten, like actual animals. There’s crazy racists, too. People who want to own other people. Not in a BDSM way, but in an Old South way.”
“Does it ever get to you?”
“I’ve been disturbed a few times, but it’s also like… I’m glad it’s me and not the women. I’m a grown man, not a co-ed. There’s no danger for me,” Evan reasons.
“Do you ever actually get turned on?” Eddie wonders if that’s too far. Sure, this guy sells the idea of sex, but Eddie’s getting personal.
“I’ve been doing this for a while and it’s only happened once. The guy accidentally made me realise I like something. It wasn’t about him though, just a kink.” Evan clears his throat.
“Are you gay?” Eddie inquires. It’s not something he’d normally ask, but given the fact that Evan spends his evenings getting men off, it seems fair game.
“I’m bi.” Evan waits a moment for a reaction. Eddie has none. “That means men and women.”
“Yeah, I know.” A beat. “So, like… you’ve actually been with both?”
“Yup. But my boss, my daytime one, told me to cut that shit out. Not bisexuality, just sleeping around. I can’t help the public if I’m disrespecting myself and them.” Evan huffs and Eddie’s almost sure he hears an eyeroll.
“I’ve only ever been with my wife,” Eddie confesses. “It’s been, like, four years since we did anything.”
“The baby cockblocked you?” Evan teases. Eddie blushes. God, if only.
“No, I did that all by myself. I’m a shitty husband.” Eddie sets his phone on the bed, turning speaker mode on. “Have you ever had a shitty boyfriend?”
“Yeah, I have. But my relationships never last long, so I just left.” Evan clears his throat. “Did you, uh…” He doesn’t finish his question. “What did you do to her?”
“I got her pregnant really young. Too young. And our families made her keep it.” Eddie bites his lip. “I mean my family. It was my family that pressured her. And I let them.”
“Oh,” Evan sounds relieved. “I thought maybe… you hurt her.”
“I did, just… not like that,” Eddie confesses. “Birth is… fucking crazy. The baby got stuck. Doctors had to intervene. She bled for weeks afterwards, then it took almost a year to recover.” The brunet shakes his head, trying not to think about how useless he was at home, then how quickly he went back to the army. Phone calls once a week at most, video calls a rarity.
“You couldn’t help the complications. I’m sure it was awful, but… you can’t control that.”
“Thanks, but I know what I did. We knew things went wrong from the beginning, but I told her she’d be fine. I love my son, he’s everything to me. But if I got her help the first day we suspected… she wouldn’t have even needed a, uh, y’know. I think she would’ve had a much better life that way.”
Eddie pictures Shannon on their graduation day. She wore a white dress under her gown and had half a dozen tassels around her neck. She was supposed to go to Texas State that fall. She even got scholarship money. And Eddie was going to start at a vocational college.
“She didn’t want to marry me, but we needed support. She stayed with my parents and I enlisted.”
“You wanted to provide,” Evan concludes.
“No, I wanted to run. My dad always said that, I provided for you, but he was never around. I said it, too. I think I might have believed it. But I know now that it’s better to be there and worry than to not know your own kid.” Eddie lets out a deep breath he didn’t know he was holding.
“It sounds like… like you’ve grown a lot, Mundo. Maybe now that you’re a little older…” Evan trails off. “It’s not all about sex, you know.”
“I know.”
“Your wife might appreciate other types of intimacy. Get the groceries. Prioritise her career. Grow flowers for her. Cook. It’s not about being a provider anymore. If you love her, you can find other ways,” Evan suggests. He sounds like he knows what he’s talking about, but, unfortunately, it’s too late.
Eddie wants to tell him as much. Wants to say that he isn’t sure how he feels about Shannon. That she was always his best friend, but… sometimes he thinks it was a mistake ever becoming more. Like he loved her, but it never felt like people talk about. But then, he’s probably overthinking things. He liked her hair and her smile even if he didn’t have sex on his mind. He loved her humor and the way she calmed him down.
If they got to take their time, met other people, came back to each other… maybe they would’ve worked. And if they didn’t, Eddie would still have his best friend. They were forever material, maybe they just got the form wrong.
“Mundo?” Evan asks. “You still there?”
“Yeah, I’m here. Just… thinking.”
Eddie gets a hint of that same feeling from Evan. Not the love, but the comfort. Evan must be good at his job. He’s already gotten further with Eddie than any therapist.
“You’re good at this,” Eddie tells him.
“Thank you.” Evan grins. Or at least, Eddie thinks he does. “I could always show you more,” he teases.
Eddie thinks about it. He’s never really considered trying anything sexual with anyone again, man or woman.
He clicks his phone screen so it lights up. Lets his eyes trace over the num pad. The 1-800 line he dialed. He sees the time. Shit, he’s really running through money on this call.
“Listen, Evan…” Say it, Diaz. “I have to go.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude,” Evan apologises. He sounds glum.
“You weren’t. It’s just my son. He’ll wake up soon,” Eddie lies. Better than saying he’s going to go broke if he doesn’t hang up.
“Ohh, gotcha. Well, I hope I was a good listener.” He sounds relieved. Eddie’s grateful.
“You were. If you don’t mind, I’d like to call again.”
“Yeah, that’d be nice. But I take every third day off, so you’ll have to do math. Today is day one of the cycle.”
“I can figure that out.” Eddie takes a deep breath. “Bye, Evan.”
“Bye, Mundo.”
Eddie waits for Evan to hang up. His phone goes dark and his heart drops just a little.
Back to business as usual.
———
Eddie desperately needs someone to talk to. He went out with a couple people from the academy during their lunch break, but none of them actually said anything. It was all gossip about captains and who is hooking up with who and what instructors are hardasses.
Eddie assumed, once the post call clarity hit, that he wouldn’t call Evan back. But he also didn’t order takeout a single time this week and he downloaded a rideshare app. While Abuelita and Tía Pepa watched Chris over the weekend, he got some hours in and picked up a bit of extra money. It should go to food or one of his many bills, but Eddie knows now that that won’t happen.
If Eddie spends fifteen dollars, he can talk for ten minutes. That’s not bad. He just has to be quick about it all.
Dial. Ask for Evan. Tell him, hey, it’s Mundo again. You might not remember. And when he remembers, don’t feel special.
“It’s been a while, Mundo. Thought you might’ve forgotten me.” Evan’s grinning. Eddie is almost sure of it.
Eddie sits on the sofa and pulls his shoes off.
“Just busy.” Just poor, more like. “How was your time off?”
“Less restful than you’d imagine.” That gets both of them laughing.
Eddie unbuttons his shirt and strips to his tank top.
“Trust me, I can imagine. I thought boot camp and war were difficult, but I come home to a four year old. He’s hungry, he needs the bathroom, he cries, needs hugs, play time, baths, walks, more food, more shitting, more of it all.” Eddie shakes his head. He sits back and puts his feet on the makeshift coffee table. “But he’s the best. Yesterday he gave me a drawing. It was just scribbles, but he made himself red and me green and asked his teacher to label it ‘Daddy and I.’ We were at a brown scribble. His interpretation of a beach.” Eddie looks to the kitchen where the picture is hanging on the fridge. Maybe he should frame it.
“That sounds kind of amazing. I love kids.” Evan lets out a deep breath. “I’m sure wiping a butt isn’t nice in the moment, though.”
“Oh, he’s potty trained. He only needs help getting on and off the toilet. We’re working on his motor skills. It’s so upsetting when he gets frustrated, but when he succeeds, it’s better than drugs.” Eddie cracks his neck and sighs.
“Oh, are you teaching him basketball?”
Basketball. So Evan does actually remember him.
“No, not yet. He’s…” Eddie considers lying or dancing around it. “He’s disabled. We’re working on basic stuff. He has a walker, but I know he wants to walk without it, play without it. At home, he’s doing really well. He stands on his own and can go short distances. With aid, he can kick and pedal his legs. It’s hard because mentally, he’s very bright. He’s reaching all of his milestones. He understands how to do stuff, but physically, he doesn’t have the same control. He knows he’s different.”
“Does your wife help?” Evan questions.
Eddie forgot that Evan knows about the wife thing, but not the separation part. They never got that far last week.
“We haven’t spoken in a year,” Eddie confesses. “But it’s okay. I’m adjusting. Soon, I’ll have a good job. My classes are almost over.”
“That’s good. Are you excited?”
“Yeah, but I’m also dreading it. I’ll work long hours and I can’t leave my son with family. He had a sleepover at my Abuelita’s so I could work this week, but she’s too old for that to be sustainable.” Eddie rubs his eyes. “God, can we change the subject?”
“Of course. Anything you like,” Evan agrees. “Do you want to tell me more about your boy?”
“I would, but…” But this is a sex hotline, not family counseling. “Better not.”
“Yeah, hey, that’s okay.” Eddie wonders if he’s imagining the other man’s disappointment. He tries to picture it. His frown or sagging shoulders.
“What do you look like?” Eddie asks. “Sorry, I mean… not sexually. Like, your hair.”
“I’m like if a blond was a brunet,” Evan describes. Eddie chuckles.
“So do you have blond or brown hair?.”
“It’s bronde.” Evan sounds so matter of fact that it shocks a laugh out from Eddie’s chest. “Hey, don’t laugh at me. That’s rude, Mundo. It’s a real thing.”
“Sure, sure. And your eyes?”
“Hold on, what about you?” Evan interjects. “You have to tell me so I can picture mi mundo.”
“I have brown hair, brown eyes.” Eddie looks at his reflection in his phone screen. He looks tired.
“I’m dark blond with light blue eyes,” Evan describes. “About six-two, pretty muscular. I have to be for work.”
“You gotta keep the public happy, huh?” Eddie teases. He toys with his St. Christopher medal.
“Yeah, exactly. Give the people what they want,” Evan plays along. “I sorta have abs, but sorta like my ca—my dad’s cooking too much. I need to cut.”
“I’m not as tall as you, but probably a bit more muscular.” Eddie lifts his undershirt and looks at his belly. He definitely has abs, but not from cutting. He just doesn’t have time for beer and nice meals. Pepa’s cooking only lasts so long.
“Oh, so it’s a competition,” Evan challenges. “I bet I can bench more.”
“It’s not a competition and you probably can. I don’t bench often. I’m more of an endurance guy.” He has to carry people, not just lift them. Evan probably does something manual. Lifts heavy stuff, puts it down. Maybe he’s a ranger or a city contractor.
“You’re telling me my stamina sucks, Mundo?” Evan bites his tongue. If he were a girl, Eddie might consider this flirting.
“I’m saying it’s not always about the weight.” Eddie tries to picture Evan again. Is he blushing, too? Is he flexing and acting all macho? “Tell me more about you. What you look like and stuff,” he requests.
“I don’t have facial hair. I have a lot of tattoos, but not cohesive sleeves. I sort of dress like a fuckboy half the time and a mom the rest. Oh, and I have a birthmark. It’s on my eyelid.”
Eddie traces his eye socket, imagining it all.
“Are you good looking?” Eddie asks. He probably won’t get the most objective answer, but he’s seen plenty of men with nice bodies and average faces.
“I’m hot. I have a big dick and a fat ass,” Evan tells him. Eddie isn’t sure how much of it is a joke. “You?”
“I think I’m fine looking. I have a narrow waist compared to my shoulders, so I guess my ass looks good.” Eddie twists on the couch, trying to take a look. “Not fat, but I’d say a B+.”
“What about your dick?”
Eddie imagines there’s a lot of eyebrow wiggling going on.
“I think it’s fine.” Eddie looks down his pants. He exhales through his nose. “In the army, they called me Snake because I’m uncut. Said it’s like a snake shedding.”
“They call me firehose.”
Eddie laughs. No way Evan was ever military.
“Oh, yeah? Who?” He questions.
“Uh, they. Which is mainly me, but…” They both snicker through the phone. “Did people actually call you Snake?”
“For a while, yeah. But they found something or someone funnier and moved on. I’m not the most interesting guy.”
Evan says Eddie’s interesting to him and Eddie knows he’s going to live off that compliment until he has the opportunity to call again.
Shit, he’s actually starting to believe he’s friends with this guy.
———
Eddie cuts the bullshit after three more calls. At this point, it’s happened five times, so odds are that it’s going to happen again. Here’s his thinking; if he says no to lunch and drinks, he’s saving money. Lunch probably cost $20 for food and a soda or coffee. Alcohol is even more expensive. Affordable places charge eight dollars for a beer, fifteen for a mixed drink, so if he would normally have two or three, that’s up to $45 he isn’t spending by saying no. In total, he’s theoretically saving over sixty bucks a day! And now that he drives, he makes about $25 an hour on top of his academy pay.
So he has a little money to spare. He can afford the ten minutes with Evan. Maybe even twenty. See, Eddie has been looking forward to their next conversation, so really, he’s just taking care of his mental health and this way cheaper than therapy (even though he could get free counseling as a vet).
Eddie calls from the car. He just finished driving and he got a couple big fares, so he’s feeling good. He could tell Evan about the whole Uber thing. They’ve both got an evening gig, now. Something to bond over.
Eddie asks Madeline for Evan. She huffs in annoyance. Eddie’s a little offended until she finally speaks.
“He’s not working right now. Could I interest you in one of our girls? Trixie’s available, she’s real good with her mouth,” the older woman suggests. Eddie must scoff because Madeline starts offering other services. He doesn’t mean to be rude, but all the names are overwhelming him, so he hangs up.
He looks in his notes app. It’s definitely the first day of Evan’s three day cycle. Eddie didn’t get the math wrong. He counts again just to make sure. Sunday he worked, and Monday, then Tuesday off. Wednesday and Thursday on, Friday off. Now it’s Saturday. He should be working.
Eddie drives home just a little annoyed. Not angry, but… but he thought they sorta had a thing. Not like a romantic or friend thing, they’re strictly professional. And missing Eddie’s call—work. Missing work. That’s not professional.
Eddie trudges in the house with a scowl. Pepa greets him and he ignores her save for a kiss to her head. He treads over to Chris’s room, his aunt following close behind.
“Eddito, are you okay?” Pepa questions, a soothing hand reaching for his back. He shrugs her off.
“Fine. Long day.” Eddie opens his son’s door.
“He’s already sleeping, cariño,” Pepa whispers. She peers in beside her nephew.
Eddie slides into the room and stands over Chris’s little bed. Chris looks peaceful. His glasses are on the side table and he’s hugging his stuffed bunny. His curls are everywhere and his jammies are riding up on his belly. Eddie takes a blanket and covers him up, tucking the edges out of habit. He sits down, kisses the boy’s head, and leans against the cot.
“Eddie,” Pepa calls quietly. “Sobrino?”
“I’m okay, Tía,” Eddie whispers. “You can go home now.” He looks toward her silhouette. She’s shaking her head.
“There’s tamales on the counter.”
“Okay.”
“And I’m making horchata tomorrow, Eddito. How much should I make for you?”
“None, I’m alright.” Eddie rests his cheek by Chris’s tiny hand. He watches his curled fingers. “Good night. Thank you.”
Pepa mutters to herself, but closes the door and walks away. The room is dark except for a star shaped nightlight.
Eddie pulls his phone out to doomscroll—he means escape reality—and reads about a building fire that spread half a block, affecting multiple homes and businesses up in Glendale. Soon, he’ll be one of the dumbasses running into that. He opens an article with an interview. Something about no casualties, just minor burns and inhalation… Somewhere along the way, Eddie must fall asleep because the next thing he knows, Chris is smooshing his face and squealing.
“Daddy!” Chris hugs his father’s head. “You’re here!”
“I’m here, buddy.” Eddie sits up. Fuck, his neck hurts. Why is it so bright in here? “Did you sleep well?”
“I slept good.” Chris curls around his bunny. Eddie wants to correct him, say well, but he doesn’t. He needs to appreciate the moment. “You came for a sleepover!”
“Yeah, I did.” Eddie laughs and brushes Chris’s hair with his fingers. Just like that, last night’s brooding melts away.
———
Eddie calls back that night. Chris is playing nicely in his room and he said, “Daddy, I’m making a surprise,” so Eddie’s sitting in the hallway with nothing but a blank wall in front of him. Chris is adamant he doesn’t spoil the gift.
It just seems like the right time for a phone call.
Eddie’s a little disappointed in himself when he dials the number from memory and doesn’t wait for a hello. The phone rings for too long before Evan connects.
“Hey, I—”
“Evan? It’s Mundo,” Eddie interrupts.
“Oh, hi. I heard I missed you yesterday.”
Eddie tilts his head back. Shit, he probably looks desperate.
“Sorry I wasn’t around. Work ran late,” Evan easily continues. “I love not sleeping for a full 39 hours.”
“Damn, you must be really dedicated to… serving the public.” Eddie places his feet on the opposite wall.
“I think it’s the adrenaline. I—” Evan cuts himself off. Eddie wishes he would continue.
“I get it. It makes you feel invincible even if it doesn’t last.” Eddie touches one of his scars. “I think that’s why I kept enlisting.”
“I tried out for the Seals, but I’m too emotional. Can’t turn off and become a machine like they do.” Evan lets out a strained chuckle, like he’s disappointed in himself.
“My ex will tell you I’m Mr.Repression,” Eddie jokes. Huh. This is the first time he’s ever called Shannon an ex. He didn’t even mean to say it. “It fits, though. I enlisted as soon as she was pregnant so I didn’t have to face it. We’d have a fight, I’d miss the high, I’d reenlist. Honestly, I’m awful. The only time I said I loved my wife was when I proposed.”
Evan doesn’t say anything for a moment. Eddie can actually hear him thinking it over.
“How old were you when she got pregnant?” He wonders. “You said teenagers, but…”
“Eighteen. Nineteen by the time our son was born.”
Evan makes a sad sound.
“You were a kid. Children aren’t supposed to have children.” He clears his throat. “I’m not trying to excuse anything that shouldn’t be excused, but how long were you even together? Were you good partners before? How could anyone cope at that age?”
Eddie feels conflicted. Logically, he agrees. But he treated Shannon like shit at every turn. He abandoned his son.
“Mundo? Those weren’t all rhetorical. How long were you with her?” Evan repeats.
“We were friends before, but we weren’t dating long. Less than a year. Probably only a few months.” Eddie scratches his head. It feels like a lifetime ago. He can’t even imagine a time before Chris. “We were good together, though. We respected each other and got along well. I loved her, I’m just not sure in what way.” Damn. That’s the first time Eddie’s admitted that to anyone aloud. He’s full of firsts.
“Have you ever thought that maybe… it wasn’t meant to be? I mean, like, maybe you were supposed to be good friends, not married.”
Yeah, honestly. Eddie’s considered that a hundred times. Like the last time they discussed Shannon instead of pick-up basketball and baking tips.
“Tell me if I’m overstepping,” Evan requests. “I know I can be a lot.”
“It’s a lot, but… I think that’s what I need. Back home, everyone kind of talks around this stuff. No one ever spoke to me about dating or sex or friendship. I was supposed to hang out with guys and date any girls I liked. I had plenty of buddies, but Sha—she was the only girl I paid attention to.” Eddie shrugs to himself and stares hard at the wall. “I mean, I liked her girl friends, but I was sort of lukewarm about them, so I assumed that was the difference between women friends and a girlfriend.”
“What happened to your guy friends?”
“I don’t know. College, work, marriage, the military. I was the first person to deploy, so I lost touch early. And with the baby stuff… I’m from a religious area. Catholic. It wasn’t a good situation.” Eddie exhales hard. “But, again, most of that fell on my ex. She couldn’t escape it like I did.”
“That’s a lot of pressure, man.” It sounds like Evan’s typing. Maybe he’s bored.
“Yeah. But, here I am. Sunny Southern California with a cute kid. It’s not all bad.” Eddie needs to get Evan interested and quick. “Say, uh, want to tell me more about you?”
Evan giggles. Wow, that’s endearing.
“Sure, Mundo. What would you like to know?”
There’s a lot Eddie would like to know. Maybe they should start with the basics.
“Like, where are you from?”
“Hershey, Pennsylvania,” Evan answers.
“You live in Hershey? What time is it for you?” Wow! Eddie never even considered a time difference.
“Oh, no, I don’t live there. I left at 18. Went to college out of state, got kicked out, went to community college for like a week, then packed up and booked it.” Evan laughs and makes a vrooming noise. “I drove around the country trying shit out for a while, ended up in South America, then made it to LA.”
So he lives in LA too. What are the chances they’ve seen each other?
“Oh, ¿hablas español?” Eddie questions.
“Sí, pero… soy ‘suck’ en eso. Necesito practicar,” Evan speaks slowly, but his pronunciation is pretty good.
“Ah, eres pésimo en eso. Necesito practicar también. Estoy decepcionando a mi abuelita porque ella me enseñó. Christopher y yo practicamos con las telenovelas,” Eddie replies, far less slowly.
“Uh, sorry… soy pésimo… uh… You deceive your grandma because she taught you?” Evan tries to clarify.
“I disappoint her. Decepcionando is like a false… similar sound.” Eddie laughs and facepalms. He sounds like he doesn’t even know English.
“False cognate, I think,” Evan suggests. “Anyway, I was a bartender in Peru. I can talk about food, drinks, and sex, but not much else. I remember por and para from high school, though. I was actually pretty good at grammar.”
“That’s better than me. I know a lot of vocabulary from my family, but not much formal grammar.” Eddie wants to offer an information exchange. He could teach Evan new words and Evan could correct him when he’s walking por la playa but he buys flowers para tu.
“You probably know more than me. I have the knowledge of a pre-schooler. Maybe Christopher and I can study together,” Evan jokes. Eddie’s taken aback by the use of his son’s name.
“Chris might be better than us. He can talk to his doctors in English and Spanish.” Eddie’s definitely proud of that accomplishment. Chris’s new GP was impressed by his knowledge in both languages, too.
“Wow, he must be so smart. I can’t even talk to them in English!” Evan jokes. “Last time I saw one, my coworker had to speak for me.”
“I bet that’s a story and a half,” Eddie comments. Maybe he’s prying a little.
“Yeah! I got a tooth knocked out by a, uh, dignified member of the public. My face swelled up and I had a black eye, but they put my tooth back and I can bite ice cream without feeling any pain now.” Evan makes a chomping sound.
“Damn, that must have hurt like hell.” Eddie whoops and chuckles. “You make a lot of sound effects. Do you work with kids in any way?”
“Sometimes, but my job isn’t related to people of any specific demographic. The sound effects are a result of this job, actually. Like, I’m not actually going to jerk off or walk in heels or start a car, so I mimic it. Not with my mouth, mostly recorded noises or slapping my leg or something.” Evan makes a noise that sounds wet. “That’s me moving my cheek, but it sounds like… I don’t know. Pussy?” Ew. Not Eddie’s first though.
And huh. Eddie never considered that people would expect Evan to make noises besides speaking and, presumably, moaning.
“So you don’t actually masturbate?”
“No way. I mean, in my private life, but not here. I have anywhere from five to fifteen calls a shift, so I couldn’t even if I wanted to.” Evan makes a sound similar to a horse walking. “That’s a cup on my table.”
“Wow, it’s pretty realistic.” Eddie raises an eyebrow. “Do you mimic a lot of sex noises?”
“Yeah, like I said, slapping my leg sounds like fapping. Most of it is moaning and talking, though. I’d fake moan, but that seems too weird with you,” Evan confesses.
“Yeah, you’ll only real moan with me.” Why the fuck did Eddie say that. “I mean, like… if you were a woman and not a male sex hotline worker.”
“Right, of course,” Evan chuckles. “I’m sure you’re very good in bed.” A beat. “With women.”
“Okay, don’t start that rumor because there’s no way to prove it’s true. If I ever get a girlfriend, I’m wearing a condom to kiss her and we won’t fuck until we’re married for at least a decade.” Eddie shakes his head. When he hears Chris giggle in the next room, he covers his mouth. He needs to watch himself.
“I bet you’re wearing one right now,” Evan teases. “Can’t get me pregnant through phone sex, don’t worry.”
“But I could normally?” Eddie questions. He’s grinning like an idiot.
“Who knows, I haven’t let a man try before. Maybe we could make butt babies.”
Wow. Blush, blush, blush. Eddie does not need to think about butts right now. Or babies. Or how they’re made. And speaking of how they’re made, Eddie hasn’t spent any quality time with his hand in…
Damn. He can’t even remember.
“I might as well be sterile. I haven’t gotten off since I moved. Literal months,” Eddie groans and shakes his head.
“I can’t say I don’t beat it on the regular, but I haven’t had sex in a while.” Evan sighs dramatically. “And I haven’t been with a guy in way too long.”
“What’s a while?” Eddie asks.
“Okay, now that I think about it, it’s only been a few weeks. But… a lot has happened. Work has been crazy. My sister randomly showed up saying she left her husband. I met you. That’s, like, at least three major events,” Evan insists. “And I only started my job eight or nine months ago, so I’m going through a lot.”
“Okay, that’s fair, but I got shot at, retired, my wife left, I became a single father, moved from Texas to LA, started job training, met you, survived an Earthquake, and got a side job in like a matter of months, too.”
“Okay, you win. I’m not a divorcee or a dad. But my serious adult girlfriend left and I’m living in her place and I haven’t gone out with a guy since I started working.” Evan grumbles to himself. “Oh, and the woman I was with and I rarely got intimate. When we did, it was so normal that I had a gay crisis.”
“A gay crisis, that must be hard. Do you miss men when you’re with a woman or women with a man?” Eddie hopes he’s not being rude, but he doesn’t know any bisexual people well enough to know if that’s a thing.
“Neither, but I do miss types of… stimulation. My ex and I were in a traditional straight relationship. In other words, she doesn’t own a strap. Didn’t.” Evan clicks his tongue. “Man, I need to move.”
“You could always bring your own,” Eddie suggests.
“I do, but if my partner doesn’t have one, chances are…” Evan trails off.
“They’re not into guns,” Eddie concludes.
“Guns? What?” Evan sounds panicked. “Why would I want someone to like guns?”
“Strap.”
“Strap- on. Like a detachable penis.” Evan laughs so hard it makes Eddie worry about his breathing. “Oh my god, not guns. I like getting pegged, Mundo.”
Oh.
“Oh.” Okay, so his Texas is showing. “I don’t think my gay friend back home would have ever admitted to being the girl with a guy, let alone a girl being the guy and a guy being the girl.”
“I think the word you’re looking for is bottom. He wouldn’t say he’s a bottom. ‘Cause even if he’s receiving, he’s still a guy,” Evan explains. “I may be a princess, but I am a man.”
“You’re a princess?” Eddie asks. “Anywhere I heard of?”
“Uh, yeah. I’m the West Hollywood Princess. Find me at Tower Bar every night of the week.”
“Really? I’ve never heard of that, is it good?” Eddie pulls his knees to his chest. Is that an invite?
“I wouldn’t know, I’ve never been outside of work. It’s expensive, a place to see and be seen. I am not bougie like that.” Evan sounds like he’s smiling. “Did you forget that I supplement my income by making men come?”
“Sorry, I forgot. Honestly, you’re the closest thing to a friend I have, so… even though I know I’m paying, it sorta feels like paying for cell minutes, not your service.” Eddie spins on his butt so he can watch Chris’s door.
“We can be friends, if you want,” Evan offers. “I know it’s lame, but outside of work, you’re the only person I talk to regularly. Well, I have my other regulars, but they’re over forty and one of them likes farts, so…”
That makes Eddie laugh.
“So, like, can I know your real job?” Eddie questions. Evan hums quietly.
“How do I know you’re not a serial killer?”
Eddie begins his response, but cuts himself off when he notices Chris through the cracked door.
“Chris!” He jumps up, opening the door too far, slamming it into the wall. He grabs his son, phone tucked to his shoulder. “No, no, no,” Eddie breathes. He takes a marker from the toddler’s hand and looks at the disaster in front of him.
“Are you okay, Mundo?” Evan asks, concern lacing his voice.
“My son just drew on the wall,” Eddie laments. He holds Chris away from his body and studies his little face. “Chris, why did you do that?”
“Suh-prise!” Chris sings. “I made it pretty!” He wiggles in Eddie’s grip.
“Chris,” Eddie whimpers. “We’re renters.”
Evan stifles his giggles through the phone.
“Does he know what renting is?”
“No, he doesn’t understand the housing market!” Eddie complains. “Chris…”
“Daddy,” Chris squeals. “Who are you talking to?” He reaches for the phone.
“Uh, my friend.” Eddie tucks Chris to his chest and grabs his phone. He puts it on speaker and kneels to examine the wall.
“Grandma?”
“No, Grandma isn’t my friend. She’s my mom.” Eddie sets his son down, but gathers up the markers.
“Abuelo?” Chris asks, looking at Eddie’s phone.
“No, not Abuelo. A man my age, a friend.” Eddie wipes the wall with his palm. Nothing.
“HELLO?” Chris asks loudly.
Evan doesn’t say anything.
“HELLO!” Chris shouts.
“Evan, it’s okay,” Eddie says. “He’s not going to stop yelling unless you say hello.”
“Hi, Chris, my name is Evan,” the man says softly.
Eddie searches for the wet wipes across the hall in the bathroom.
“My name is Chris.” Chris settles on his belly, an arm under his cheek. “Why are you talking to Daddy?”
“Dad wanted to talk to a friend and we are friends,” Evan explains simply. “Do you have friends?”
“Are you in Texas or Cal-uh-for-nuh?” Chris questions, lips pursed and nose scrunched. Eddie comes back into his room with wipes, already bunching some in his fist.
“I am in California. Do you like California?” Evan asks. Chris nods enthusiastically.
“Chris, this isn’t FaceTime. You need to use words.” Eddie starts by rubbing firmly on a yellow scribble.
“Yes,” Chris calls out. “I like Abuelita’s house.” He plays with a long strand on his rug.
“Oh, is Abuelita your grandma? I loved my grandma’s house, too.”
“No, she’s my friend.” Chris sighs. “Grandma is in Texas.”
“Actually, buddy, Abuelita is your grandma, too. Your great-grandma.” Eddie lifts the wipe. It’s actually coming off.
Evan is laughing again. It makes Eddie feel just a little lighter.
“How’s it going, Mundo?” He asks. “Still freaking out?”
“No, I just feel stupid for leaving a child alone with markers. At least he didn’t eat anything.” Eddie looks at Chris again. “Baby, that was not nice. Daddy has to clean it off.”
Chris pouts, lip trembling.
“But it’s a present!” He whines.
“I know, but…” Eddie’s at a loss.
“Hey, Chris?” Evan begins. Chris wipes at his eyes, staring at the phone. “Have you ever gotten a present like clothes?”
“Mhm,” Chris hums.
“Have they ever been too big or too small?”
“Mhm.”
“Well, maybe, this present was too big for Daddy. He needs a smaller size, like a piece of paper.” Evan pauses and Chris looks like he’s contemplating it. “If you colour the wall, how can Dad carry your drawing around?”
Chris makes a small oh like that’s a very important point he hasn’t considered before.
“It was too big?” He asks his father. Eddie nods, sort of surprised that worked. Usually, Chris is beyond reasoning once that lip starts trembling. “I’m sorry,” Chris whispers.
“It’s okay, Superman. But from now on, can you make me pretty pictures on paper?” Eddie strokes the boy’s hair. “I want to show them off everywhere.”
Chris nods and curls around Eddie’s leg. Eddie sighs and drops the wet wipes. He’ll have to deal with this situation later.
Eddie grabs his phone and takes it off speaker.
“Can you be a good boy while I say goodbye to Evan?”
“Bye-bye, Evan,” Chris waves. Eddie smiles and kisses his head.
“Hey, Ev,” Eddie says. “I would never think of something like that. You’re smart.”
“It’s my job to help, remember?” Evan sounds calm, less intense than ever. “So, I guess this is good night?”
“Unfortunately. I better give Chris a bath and clean the wall before the marker soaks in. He’ll probably want a snack and storytime, too.” Eddie rubs his eye. “Maybe I could call again this week, if I have time.”
“Yeah, that’d be nice. It’s your… am I on speaker?”
“No.”
“It’s your money. If you need it for that cutie, save it. I’ll be here next week.”
God, why is the one nice, normal person Eddie knows on the opposite end of a pay wall?
“Thanks. I’ve put away some money for myself. Nothing much, just if I want a beer or a chat.” Eddie looks at Chris, who’s squirming. “Alright, I better let you go. My baby needs a tubby!”
Chris giggles and shakes his head.
“Yessir, you’re getting washed,” Eddie coos.
“Alright, Mundo. I’ll talk to you soon.”
———
After the wall is fixed up, Chris is washed, read to, and in bed, and Eddie showers, the brunet sits on his bed contemplating life and all of its greatest hits.
His mind wanders back to Evan. Well, not Evan, but their conversation. So he’s the girl sometimes. What was the word he used? Bottom? He’s a bottom. Sometimes.
Eddie hasn’t thought much about butts before. Shannon was pretty, but Eddie was more focused on her personality, so he actually hasn’t thought about bodies much at all. And now that he doesn’t think about her like a wife, he definitely doesn’t think about her when he feels… inclined.
But butts. Haha. But. Butts.
Theoretically, butts do sound nice. They’re kind of soft, but firm. They have the, uh, hole part. Which probably, if Eddie had to guess, feels good around a penis. Which is not a gay thought because women have butts and, hey, a lot of things feel nice down there.
So maybe Eddie doesn’t bother getting dressed. He wraps a hand around himself and considers the sensation. It’s nice. Could be a little better. He just so happens to have aloe because it’s the best way to soothe burns and, listen, he’s almost a firefighter. So he puts a little in his palm. And his hand ends up sorta stroking himself.
It’s not bad. Kinda makes his thighs and belly tingle in a distantly familiar way.
God, it’s been way too long.
He squeezes a little. Is that what a butt would feel like? He rubs his cock firmly, testing out different grips. None of them feel super similar to a vagina, so he probably can’t simulate an ass with his hand. But, if he pictures it… the thought is pleasing. A fair, round ass. Firm, but jiggly. Easy to part. Eddie can’t really picture a pussy below it. On a guy, would he see dick and balls, or would the legs be in the way? Maybe he shouldn’t picture being behind someone, he hasn’t been there before.
Facing someone, then.
Eddie pulls his foreskin back and grips the head. He jerks the tip, tensing and breathing deeper. That’s really nice. He can sort of picture putting the tip in. The person under him… still fair. Light hair… Eddie can’t really picture any genitals, but he sees abs. Defined, but soft. Golden hair from the belly button down.
And he doesn’t really picture tits either. Flatter, firmer, with pink nipples. No hair, but muscle definition. No face, but soft pink lips. An open mouth.
Mundo.
Eddie thrusts into his fist. Fuck, that feels good. God, he’s getting close.
So, the person’s tight around Eddie and they’d touch him, his back and neck. They’d say his name, Mundo, Mundo. They’d tell him it feels so good. Eddie would kiss them and they’d kiss back with tongue, so Eddie would lean over them and kiss them while he fucks them and…
Eddie jerks his tip, thumbing at the slit and panting.
God, he’d hold their legs and they’d hold him around the neck and they’d moan for him, Mundo. And they’d clench on it and roll their hips and ask for him to keep going. Then, they’d be close and Eddie would be close, so they’d breath into each other’s mouths and tell each other to come. Eddie would touch them between their legs. Whatever’s there. In his mind, he’s jerking the person off. Probably because he’s beating his dick.
And, fuck, he’d make them come first so he could feel them tense and hear his name again, Mundo. And when Eddie finally finishes, he’d finish inside. Part of Eddie’s mind doesn’t picture any protection, just warmth and semen and ass and thighs.
Eddie comes hard, squeezing his eyes shut. Blue eyes and a square jaw and bronde hair flash under his lids as his dick spurts, wetting his stomach. He twitches, massaging himself through the waves of pleasure, thick drops of cum getting on his hand.
He opens his eyes to a blank ceiling. As his mind focuses on the sound of cars outside and the mess he made and his cooling sweat, Eddie tries to avoid thinking about Evan. Because he absolutely did not just picture a guy. And if he did, it’s just the mystery of what Evan looks like and butt sex combining to confuse Eddie.
It definitely couldn’t be Evan because Eddie didn’t picture a single tattoo and Evan said he has a lot. So. There.