Chapter Text
It wasn't cold enough to need a hoodie, but it was cold enough that Jackie could feel it on her bare arms as she pulled up the carrots from the Walter's new allotment. The sun was beginning to set, it was at the point where it was high enough not to make a difference in the light, but low enough to turn the sky pink.
“You need some help with that New York?” Cole's voice startled Jackie from behind.
She turned to face him, smile on her face “what are you doing out here?”
“Helping you” Cole answered, kneeling down next to her and pulling up a radish. He tossed it into the basket with the carrots, causing Jackie to give a frustrated sigh.
“That's not a carrot” she said, giving him a look that wasn't quite annoyed, but couldn't be described as anything else either.
“I don't see any radish basket” Cole teased.
“That's because I haven't started picking them yet” Jackie retorted.
“Then you definitely need my help, no way you're getting all these out before dark” Cole said as he pulled another radish out, this time placing it in the empty basket next to the carrots.
“I wasn't planning to” Jackie replied, moving the first radish into what was now the radish basket as well.
“You do the carrots, I'll do the radish” said Cole, leaving no room for argument.
Jackie pulled up the last few carrots, filling the basket beside her. She reached over to help Cole with the radishes, her hand accidentally closing around his as he reached for the same radish. He looked up to meet her eyes, a soft, hopeful expression on his face. They froze like that, radishes forgotten, eyes locked.
Jackie pulled her hand back “sorry- sorry I just finished with the carrots so I thought-"
“Why can't we be together?” Cole cut her off, his voice sincere.
“Cole…” Jackie began, her eyes unable to meet his, “you're the reason Alex and I broke up” she said, finally meeting his eyes, his beautiful green eyes.
“Alex is with Kiley now” Cole pressed, his hand moving to Jackie's leg. “He's moved on”
“But what if he hasn't?” Jackie asked, not moving away from Cole's touch, but not embracing it. She looked down, almost ashamed “I just…I don't think I could do that to him” she looked back up, meeting Cole's confused gaze again “he's your brother, would you really want to do that to him? Again?"
“No” Cole replied, voice serious “which is why I wouldn't ask you this if I wasn't sure he was over you” he moved slightly closer to her, his hand drifting from her leg up to her forearm. “It's been months, Jackie”
The sun had fully set now, and the pair could only see each other by the lights coming through the windows of the ranch house a few meters away. “Do you really not want me?” Cole asked, his other hand slipping into Jackie's.
“I can't not want you” Jackie said, voice tight, “How could I not want you your-”
“Shh” Cole placed his finger over her lips. “You can have me”
“I can't have you, Cole” Jackie fought back the emotion in her voice.
“Why?” Cole asked, frustration spilling into his words as he squeezed her hand.
“You know why” Jackie's insides felt like they were all in the wrong places as she gripped Cole's hand in return.
Their gazes lingered on each other for awhile, the only sound was that of the nightlife beginning to wake up and they're heavy breathing.
“Are you scared?” Cole asked eventually, breaking the silence between them.
Jackie nodded, her eyes leaving his “yes”
“I'm not gonna let you lose yourself, you know? I've got you, New York” he put his hands on her shoulders, holding her firmly. “One night? Just to see? And then, after, if you can't do it I promise I will never ask you again” Jackie looked at him, she didn't know what to answer. One night of just letting herself be Cole's. She wanted it. But oh she did not want to lose herself again. She did not want to hurt Alex. But if it was just one night? She could let herself have all she wanted, without those consequences. “Alex isn't home till Monday” Cole added, a smirk on his face.
“Okay, just tonight” Jackie leaned in and finally kissed him. It always felt better with Cole. She didn't need to think about how she was kissing, or where she put her hands. It just happened, and it happened so well. She pulled away, smile plastered on her face. “But lets get these vegetables dug up first, Colorado"
He laughed, smile matching hers “okay”
— – - – —
They walked into the ranch house, a muddy basket in each of their hands. Cole took Jackie's basket and left it by the door before walking over to the sink and washing the dirt off his hands. Jackie stood beside him, eyes trained on the way he rubbed his hands together under the flowing water. He stepped back from the sink, letting Jackie wash the dirt off her own hands.
As she was drying them, Cole grabbed her arm and pulled her towards the stairs. “Cole!” She laughed, flicking the water she hadn't managed to dry off into Cole's face.
They ran up the stairs together, then Cole pushed Jackie through the door to his room. “What about Danny?” Jackie asked as Cole closed the door.
“Eh, he won't be back for ages” Cole said, leaning against the door, facing Jackie.
“I have my own room” Jackie said, reaching for the door handle.
“I like the risk” Cole smirked, stopping Jackie from opening the door. Jackie sighed. Cole gently put his arm around her, “Hey, you trying to waste our time?”
— – - – —
Cole woke up feeling groggy. He smiled as he realised Jackie was still in the bed next to him. He watched her for a while, she looked so peaceful, so beautiful. He just wanted to hold on to this moment forever.
“You both missed breakfast” Danny said, appearing in the doorway with a tray in his hands and a smirk on his face.
“Thanks, Danny” Cole said as Danny set the breakfast tray down on the desk.
“Doesn't Jackie have her own bed?” Danny teased.
“Shut up” Cole said, though he couldn't keep the smile off his face.
“You both looked so happy when I came in last night” Danny admitted “it was almost cute”
“When did you get in?” Cole asked, sitting upright a bit more.
“About 1am, rehearsals really ran over”
“Wait…we weren't like…?”
“No, no. You were both asleep, she was on your chest, I was slightly scared you might be suffocating her in your arms” Danny explained, fondness in his voice.
“Danny” Cole asked, a more serious tone in his voice this time.
“Yeah?”
“Can you…not tell anyone? I don't care!! But, uh, Jackie isn't really…” he trailed off, not sure how to explain it to his brother, but hoping he'd understand.
“Yeah, don't worry” Danny smiled. “I'm gonna go meet Erin so…yeah. Bye”
“Bye” Cole watched his brother leave, before he settled back down into bed next to Jackie.