My Stubborness Will Put Up a Fight

by lepetiterik

Summary:

When a letter arrives in Grimglass, Felix and Mildmay must go back to Mélusine. While Felix fixes the Mirador's problems, Mildmay deals with the ghosts of his past.

Notes:

Partly this was inspired by me finishing the last book and thinking Mildmay deserved to have a crashout. We watched Felix crash out for four books. Now it's Mildmay's turn. Originally, I was going to write this for Whumptober, but it spiraled beyond that and I definitely don't have the time to finish it neatly during this month.

This is unbetaed so have fun.

Chapter 1

Mildmay

 

Felix had been acting all squirrelly since he got back from town. Like he was nervous or something. Like he was avoiding talking about something. And from the looks he kept shooting my way, he didn't think I'd like it. I didn't think I was going to like it none neither.

I wanted to wait a little, let him sweat it out a bit. He was getting better about telling me things, even when he knew I wouldn't like what he had to say. And not like before when we'd just fight about it. But it wasn't as often anymore that he'd be shitty for no reason. We'd left a lot of that behind, but Felix looked like he'd rather shove an entire seagull in his mouth than tell me why he was acting like he was.

Must be something I'd really hate then.

I can't imagine what it would be. We lived at the end of nowhere, so unless someone did something shifty in town, there's not much trouble Felix could have gotten into.

So I went about my day like he wasn't making me feel restless just watching him. He'd disappear into his books for a time and then come find me, start a conversation like he wanted to say something, and then clam up and head back to his books.

After the fifth time this happened, the sky was turning all sorts of fiery colors. I decided if he didn't tell me by dusk, then I'd ask him about it.

Turns out I didn't even have to wait that long. Not a septad of minutes after he left, he was back at the door. I was checking the clockwork for the lighthouse. We'd figured out how to automate the crank for the counterweight. After some experiments and letters back and forth to Hutchence, Felix did something and created a small hocus machine, what he called "thaumaturgic engine." I don't know about all that stuff, but it saved me from having to wind up the weight all night and meant far less time going up and down the stairs until we got the lift working.

But all that didn't mean we didn't have to keep the gears in good condition. Or well, I did. Felix was good at the theoretical stuff, but when it came to getting into the clockwork in order, he was about as useful as a chocolate teapot.

"Here," Felix said, setting down a cup of tea and sitting next to me as I put the last gear back in place.

I wiped my hands on the rag next to me that was more grease than rag at this point. Felix made a face at it as I picked up the mug. "Thanks."

He tapped his fingers on the mug, his rings making a clinking noise. "I got a letter today."

I took a sip of tea, wondering if that was what got him so wound up. I nodded.

"From Mélusine."

I shifted, turning towards him a little. "Mehitabel?"

Felix made a face I couldn't quite read, and usually I was pretty good at it. "Yes, sort of," he drew out. "But also Stephen."

I set my cup down. "What does he want?" I said as neutrally as I could.

"Oh something about the Virtu causing wizards to get sick," he said airily, like he was trying real hard to make it sound like it wasn't a huge problem.

"You ain't got nothing to do with that," I said, lowly.

"'Don't have anything'," he corrected. I rolled my eyes. "I know. Stephen is calling me back to fix it."

"Why?" I asked, turning fully towards him. "You don't owe them nothing anymore."

"'Anything,' and don't I?" Felix asked, staring into his tea like it might have an answer.

"No, and the Mirador can solve their own problems," I grumbled. They had wanted to burn Felix at the stake, and now they wanted him to fix their shit. Typical.

"Apparently, they can't," Felix said, a little snidely, like he had the same thought I had. "It sounds like I was not their first choice, and likely not even their third. But," he took a breath, "Seeing as I fixed it the last time, I might be able to pinpoint what is causing problems."

"So you're thinking about going back." Felix nodded, staring into the tea, his brow creased in thought.

"And nothing I say will convince you this is a terrible fucking idea," I said, rubbing my hand across my face before remembering I was still covered in grease. Good job, Milly-Fox.

"I know it's a terrible idea," Felix glanced up. "But what choice do I have?"

We sat in silence for a moment, me looking up at the light mechanism and him back in the tea cup. Well, ain't this just the bitchkitty. We were going back to Mélusine, and it didn't matter a damn if I wanted to go or not.

"I suppose we could ask Kay if he knows of anyone to take care of the lighthouse while we're gone," I said after a moment.

"We?" Felix asked, surprised, looking over at me with his skew eyes.

"You can't find your way out of a wet paper bag, what makes you think you're getting back to Marathat on your own?" I nudge him with my shoulder. He wrinkled his nose and brushed the invisible grease off his shirt.

"I know it's in that general direction," he gestured with his teacup. I pushed the teacup a foot in the other direction, towards where Marathat would be. "Anyway, there are maps!"

I sighed. Sure, I could have dug my heels in and told Felix where the Mirador could stick their letter, but he'd be just as determined to go and like fuck I was going to let him walk into that viper's nest without backup. I still thought it was a dumb fucking idea, but it didn't matter much what I thought.

I followed Felix across the continent more than once and by Kethe, I'd do it again.

 

Chapter 2

Summary:

On the way to Mélusine.

Felix

 

Mehitabel's letter had been much more informative than Stephen's had been. While Stephen's letter had come with an official summons to give in Esmer, Mehitabel would arrange for our travel once we reached Bernatha. It would take us much less time than walking with a mule had and I, for one, was glad of that. It would certainly save Mildmay some trouble as well.

I suppose I shouldn't have been surprised Mildmay agreed to go with me to Mélusine. I just assumed he'd push back more about it. Yes, he gave some token protests and even the next morning he asked again if I was sure I wanted to go, but never did he suggest he wouldn't go with me.

Mildmay would walk on knives for you.

I shook away that thought. I confess, it would have been strange to go back without him. We'd hardly been separated for all the time since we met, and I've heard more than a few townspeople refer to us as a set. Where one was, the other wasn't far behind.

I was still apprehensive about being back in the Mirador, but knowing I wouldn't be alone was of some comfort, and Mildmay was more than correct, damn him, that I was terrible with directions. He was also better about packing and, within a week of the letter arriving, had our home prepared for our absence, someone to care for the lighthouse, and our bags packed.

That is not to say I was idle. I spent that time poring through my now modest collection of texts for any hint as to what could possibly be wrong with the Virtu now. I had even picked Thamuris's mind, wondering if it was an issue with my casting. While he couldn't think of an outright problem, he agreed to do some research on his side. I could tell Thamuris wasn't pleased that we were traveling back to Mélusine, but he ultimately agreed that an issue with the Virtu should probably not be ignored.

Before setting off, we said our goodbyes to Kay. We took the paddle-steamer back to Esmer. I still wasn't thrilled about taking the boat, but Mildmay spent much of the trip in the machine room discussing how the engine worked. That didn't much hold my interest, but I enjoyed seeing Mildmay excited, his keen eyes drinking in how each part worked. I had suggested more than once that he should look into learning a trade or really anything that would get him out more into Grimglass, but he was stubborn and said he was happy enough to visit Kay, run the lighthouse, and play a few hands of Long Tiffany in the local tavern. I wasn't sure how true that was, but after everything I've put him through, who was I to suggest he was not content.

 

Mildmay

 

The letter didn't say nothing about me, but that didn't surprise me none. Seeing as they probably still thought I was under the obligation d'ame, they probably assumed I'd be tagging along. We'd just have to be careful they didn't find out it had been removed. The binding had been the only thing protecting me from a fiery end, not to mention the people who'd want my head in the Lower City. While I could probably still hold my own, quick escapes were long past me. Better to stick close to Felix and put up with pompous hocus bullshit than show my face outside the Mirador.

But then again, I wasn't sure what the hocuses, Virtuers, whatever, in Esmer had told the Mirador. We'd just have to be cautious when we arrived in Mélusine. I was fucked either way.

Traveling wasn't so bad this time, except I could tell Felix was impatient. It was nice to stop in Esmer on our way. Felix got to do some research, which put him in a little better mood and he got to visit with Hutch and Corbie. Felix didn't find what he was looking for though, so we didn't stay more than a couple of days.

It weren't long before we were on a train, heading back to the one place I had hoped we'd never have to go back to again.

Felix was drumming his fingers on the arm of the train seat, the light glinting off his rings.

I pulled out a deck of cards, holding them up.

"Are you asking if I want to play a round or just showing me you have them?" Felix sighed.

I just started dealing. "It's this or you driving me crazy for the next few days." He was making me anxious just looking at him.

Picking up his cards, "I don't believe there was a flaw in my casting when I linked the Virtu to the Sim and I'm loath to go back to check."

"Think someone could have broken it again?" I didn't think it was likely but I know nothing and care less about all that.

"No," he said, setting down his cards and looking out the window. "If that had been it, the letter would have said as much, but this sounds more like a corruption. I would need to see the affected and the Virtu itself to confirm if that is what we're dealing with."

I hummed in agreement. "In any case," Felix continued, "we won't know until we get there. It's your deal."

Notes:

If this chapter feels short and hurried, it's because it is. This isn't about their travels. We'll be coming up on the Mélusine next time!

Notes:

Be gentle with me, I haven't written a fic in years and this is my first in DoL. If you see a spelling error, no you didn't. Unless it was funny.