Hate

by Lecerx

Summary:

You hate Kris Dreemurr.

They mistreated you, locked you in a cage, and above all, betrayed you and your friends...

And you will make sure they pays for what they did.

Notes:

• A translation of Odio by Lecerx

You hate Kris Dreemurr.

Just a few days ago, you woke up in their body. You didn't know they was their own person, but then again, you didn't know what was going on. You were in a dark place, and someone asked you to create a body, so you did. It was beautiful. You had so many hopes for it and what you would do with it. You wanted to use it so badly.

But no one chooses who they are in this world, and you had to control Kris's body.

Despite knowing nothing about your situation—having just been born and finding yourself in a hostile, unknown world—you wanted to do your best.

You became friends with Susie and Ralsei. You tried to treat everyone well, even when they attacked, hurt, and even killed you.

You tried to be good, and... In the end, everyone helped you, that kindness you gave was returned and that was very nice, it made you feel good, it made you feel satisfied with the good you did, and you would do it again…

You sealed the dark fountain, stepped out into a world that was also new, a light world, and explored. All that fear, confusion, and nervousness you had that morning was gone, and you felt that, no matter how strange the situation was, you could live well, even in that body that didn't feel entirely yours... That was strange, all day, throughout the adventure, your body didn't feel like yours, in some strange way, but you got used to the feeling...

But when night came and you went to bed after such an exhausting day, you found out why that body didn't feel like yours. You found out why that body didn't feel like yours. That you weren't Kris... Kris was their own person. And you understood, for that brief moment you understood, you really empathized with Kris.

They was probably as confused as you were. Imagining yourself in that situation made you understand why they locked you in a cage. Despite your fear, despite the devastating feeling of not having a body again, of not being able to do anything, you understood and comprehended why Kris locked you in there.

So, you decided to continue being good. You thought that if you were good to Kris, if you continued being good to everyone, if you continued helping them on his adventure and helping they make more friends, they would understand that you were good, and he wouldn't lock you in the cage again, that you could be friends and share their body in a better way...

That wasn't the case.

You, Kris, Susie, and Ralsei had another adventure. You were good. You helped everyone. You made friends... And you got really scared.

Seeing Spamtom was like seeing yourself, at least in a way... You also lacked control of the situation, you couldn't do what you wanted, not really, and seeing someone who sought freedom die like that... It scared you.

It scared Kris, too—at least according to Ralsei—so again, you felt empathy. Kris was locked up with you, and you were locked up with Kris, both of you were restricted, it was ugly, it was horrible... But you still wanted to befriend them. You wanted to be their friend.

But Kris didn't want that.

After finishing that adventure and returning home with Susie, you hoped to have fun with her and Toriel.

You liked Toriel. She was kind, sweet, and funny. Even though you knew her love was directed at Kris, it was as if it were also for you. In a strange way, it made you feel good.

You didn't have a nice experience with them.

Kris pulled you out of their body. For a moment, you understood. "They just wants to spend time with their mom and best friend." You could handle that, so even though they put you in that dark drawer, even though you were so scared and had so many bad memories of that void... You tolerated it and didn't get angry at Kris... At least not for a moment... Kris left the room. They didn't go with their mom or Susie. They left. For hours and hours, they left you locked up... In the dark... As if you didn't matter... Of course, you didn't matter, not for them. They didn't care how you felt. But you understood; you tried to.

They wasn't a bad guy; they was one of the heroes of the prophecy... They was just a little weird, but even though they locked you up, they never really hurt you... So, you put up with it.

You put up with being locked up for hours. You tried your best not to get angry with Kris and to understand... Still, you wanted to talk... Talking was how you resolved fights, right? Maybe if you could talk to Kris, something would change.

When they arrived, you tried to communicate with them. You tried to talk to Kris. He just looked at you with contempt and disgust.

That made you feel bad, insignificant, despicable... You stood still and let them pull you back into their body.

“It's okay, it's logical that they dislikes me... I'll just keep being good and then we can talk, it's not bad, they doesn't want to hurt anyone, Kris... Just still confused.” That's what you thought, although, in reality, despite your optimism... You felt very bad. But you endured it.

You just had to keep being good and that kindness would return, it was only a matter of time...

Kris opened a dark fountain.

In the living room.

You saw them do it, it was terrifying, and you were very confused about what happened... Was Kris evil? No... It didn't make sense...

Maybe they just... wanted to have a good time with Susie, dark worlds were fun, right? Maybe that was all it was... But you were still worried. How could they risk opening a dark world there? Toriel was sleeping, she could get confused, get hurt, something... Didn't they think about that? Again, you tried to see the best in Kris, but... Deep down, you knew that your perception of Kris had changed... You no longer saw them as just a scared teenager...

But you didn't want to think the worst... And you tried to have fun before closing the fountain... And it was fun, playing all those cute games, enjoying Tenna's silliness... It was nice... Although, it bothered you quite a bit that you couldn't get an S rank.

Still, it was a pretty enjoyable world. When you reached the end and saved Toriel from Tenna, you felt happy. You felt happy that Tenna wasn't really a bad guy, just someone... Who felt bad about how time had passed and how things had turned out. Someone who wanted to go back to those good times.

So, when you saw how the Knight cut off both his arms... You became enraged... The Knight just killed Tenna in front of you?... The Knight... Killed someone you considered a friend?

No... That's when you discovered it, you discovered the limit of your kindness. You wouldn't allow the person who did that to go unpunished. You wouldn't allow the knight to live.

When you saw him, when you saw the knight... A hatred you had never felt before took hold of you, and you were ready to give everything you had to kill the guy who had just killed Tenna, and you fought... For the first time, you attacked someone—the knight—and hurt him... You wanted to kill him.

But Kris was holding back.

They saw Tenna die and just held back... They smiled... They seemed to enjoy the situation...

That was the first time you got really angry with Kris. But you ignored everything, ignored the limitations you had, and gave everything to kill the knight... And you won. You defeated the knight, in the hardest fight (by far) you'd ever had, on the first try... You felt great. You wanted to deliver the final blow and avenge Tenna.

Kris held back again, and the knight hit you, Susie and Ralsei...

Again you were furious with Kris, you wanted to scream with all your might, to ask them what the hell they was doing. But you couldn't.

You followed the knight, wanting to finish what you started... You couldn't... He locked himself in the bunker with Undyne. Would he kill someone else? Would Kris allow it? What was wrong with that idiot? On top of that, he didn't even let you into the bunker...

That was the first time you truly felt hatred for Kris, that you stopped trying to understand them, to justify their treatment of you, to justify them creating a dark fountain...

That was your limit.

That Kris would let Tenna die...

But Tenna was still alive.

Somehow Susie saved him... So... That made you quite happy, and calmed your anger a little... Despite that, that new hatred for Kris, that feeling you avoided feeling all those days, didn't diminish... But it wasn't as much as the hatred you had for the knight... That's why you didn't do anything.After all... You didn't want to hurt Kris. They hadn't done irreparable damage. Tenna was still alive, and most likely Undyne too... Maybe Kris had their own motivations. Motives that weren't bad. You didn't know; you were confused. Even so, the hatred didn't go away. But it still wasn't as strong as the hatred you felt for the knight...

So you would wait a little longer, you would be patient to find out exactly what was going on and discover Kris's motives for collaborating with the knight, for betraying her friends... After finding out, you would act.

Or so you thought, but Kris pushed you to your limit.

They kicked you out of his body again at Noelle's house while they were looking for clues... Of course, it made sense. Why would they let you snoop around and figure out how to get into the bunker? They obviously wasn't going to let you ruin their plan...

You calmed down.You were able to quickly get out of the box he locked you in. So you were able to take a moment to calm down, think clearly, and decide to look for clues that way... Despite how awful it felt not to have a body.

You wandered around the vents for a while until you went to the kitchen... There it was, lying on the counter with a bottle of chocolate milk. Was Kris okay? A part of you—the kindest part—kept looking deep down to justify Kris's actions and saw only someone who might need help... And like a fool, you approached.

Kris jumped on top of you, squeezed you hard, and took you back to the room. It hurt; this time, it hurt a lot... You held on and tried with all your might not to hurt them... Then you went to Dess's room. You approached the guitar, looking for a code to enter the bunker... They hit you again, threw something at you, and hurt you badly.

It hurt a lot.

And it didn't end there. When Susie and Noelle came in looking for you, Kris put them both in the closet, hiding them and... You tried to reach him, to reach the guitar, furious. Kris hit you again, this time with a hockey stick. Again and again... They hit you so hard; it hurt so much. You wanted to scream, but you couldn't. You tried to alert Susie and Noelle, but that didn't work either. You wanted to hit Kris with all your might and hurt them the way they hurt you. But you didn't have a body...

You reached for the guitar. Kris hit you again. There was a lot of noise, and Susie opened the closet door. But... It was useless; she didn't see you... She took the guitar, told Kris to look for clues, and left.

After that, Kris put you back in their body.

You had to endure it... You had to resist the urge to hurt Kris... You wanted to make they punch themself, bite his tongue, and bang his head against the wall. You didn't know why you endured it, you didn't know why you stopped yourself... Was it kindness? Believing that there was still something good in Kris? You didn't know.

But you endured. Just like you did all those days... You hoped they would realize that you were good. After enduring with all your strength not to hurt them, you continued with the adventure.

That was by far the worst adventure of all.

The most painful.

The saddest.

The most terrifying.

It made you hate Kris even more. Because you managed (miraculously) to get to the knight the first time, but again, Kris stood still... You were able to face the knight. But Kris, that damn bastard, didn't want to.

A part of you, that dark part that came out when you tried to kill the knight the day before, felt pleasure. Sadistic pleasure. You enjoyed knowing that Kris was really hurt by those shards of glass, and part of you wanted them to endure the pain without healing. You felt disappointed when Ralsei healed Kris.

They didn't deserve it. They didn't deserve to be healed. They didn't deserve to be treated well after everything they did, after how they betrayed you and your friends. After how they hurt you.

But... you held back... You had to do what was best for the group. It was bad enough to have a saboteur in the group. If you started hurting Kris on purpose, it would be unnecessarily difficult to get through that dark world... Still, you had to admit that part of you was less careful when Kris was the target.

The adventure continued and was fun, but... Much less so than the others, everything was so strange... So sad... So hopeful, in a strange way.

But, without a doubt, it was the most dangerous adventure you had. All the enemies were tough. And the end... Facing a titan... It was terrifying. It was hard. It was sad.

It was sad because, once again, one of the things you told yourself to believe that Kris was good at heart... Fell apart...

You thought the knight wasn't so bad. That he didn't want to destroy the world... But he summoned a Titan...

Kris worked with the knight, Kris did everything they could to help him... The knight summoned a titan... Because of Kris... Because Kris held them back, because Kris prevented them from truly harming the knight...

You hated them.

You really, really hate Kris...

No part of you wanted to believe they was good anymore. You were tired of being nice to them. They didn't deserve your kindness. They didn't deserve your pity... They didn't deserve anything.

That night, when they arrived at the house and saw Toriel, drunk and dancing with the skeleton... You felt good.Knowing that Kris was suffering made you feel good... And if it weren't for the anger and helplessness you felt when Kris locked you in that cage... You would have really enjoyed watching they cry and suffer in bed all night as they deserved.

You got tired. You reached your limit. You were good, you were kind, and in return you only got hatred, contempt, physical harm, being locked up like an animal in a cage all night... And the worst... Your friends were in danger, they suffered, they cried...

Kris didn't deserve your kindness.

You gave kindness and kindness was not returned.

Kris gave cruelty and you would make sure that cruelty was returned.

That morning, when Kris returned from his mysterious night out, you looked at them... You didn't move, you didn't try to communicate, you just looked at them.

Kris approached silently, opened the cage, and reached inside... You moved away from them because you didn't want them to touch you. The mere idea disgusted you... You kept looking them in the eyes, and they looked back at you... This time, their contempt didn't affect you. Not like before. It only made you hate them more.

 

"What do you think you're doing?" For the first time, you heard them... Their voice was... Soft, sounding curious and furious at the same time... Their voice disgusted you so much... But... You were given the option to respond...

"All this time... Could you have talked to me?” Your voice sounded hateful, and you saw Kris back away a little.But he continued to look at you with contempt and ignored your question.

“Yesterday was... A shitty day... Don't make today the same." Another wave of hatred washed over you. They had a bad day?... What right did they have to say that?

"I treated you well… I was good... Why do you hate me?..." Even so... That's all you wanted to know... If you were good, why wasn't Kris good to you?...

"I treated you better than I should have, you life-stealing parasite... You don't understand anything that's going on... If you stopped meddling in things that don't concern you, I wouldn't have to do this... So shut up... And don't ruin this day... Understood?"

"I hate you." Kris laughed a little, grabbed you, and pulled you close.

"You disgust me... If you don't want me to treat you worse... Don't ruin this day..." You didn't care about the threatening tone they used. You didn't care how hard they squeezed you. You didn't care about anything.

 

Kris put you back inside their body... You stayed still...

You looked at the window... You approached it and after a few moments you forced Kris to come down, even though this time they seemed to want to resist... They gave in after a brief struggle... They didn't understand what you wanted to do. You didn't care in the slightest, no matter how hard they tried, it was time for your revenge.

As you climbed down, you made their body falter slightly. This caused they to misstep and fall from the window, landing on their arm. You heard a crack. Kris's HP dropped by 2 points.

You smiled. You couldn't hear them, but you were sure they was crying or moaning in pain. You didn't care. You forced them to get up, making sure their used their injured arm to do so.

Then... You walked to school. Kris was going to suffer; you were going to make sure of that... You were going to make sure he remembered everything you were going to do to them.

So, before doing what you had in mind, you had to get Ralsei to heal Kris's wounds, and then you could save. You made sure Kris knew why you were doing everything you had planned.

You arrived at school, forced Kris's body to enter by banging on the door with their broken arm (or fractured, you didn't know which it was, but... you hoped it was broken), and then you finally went inside.

You walked slowly toward the door to the dark world, savoring the moment. It was a shame that you couldn't feel Kris's fear or hear their cries of pain... Was they begging you to stop hurting them?

You hated not being able to tell them that you wouldn't stop.

After standing in front of the closet... You stood still, watching, making sure Kris was desperate to get in and that Ralsei would heal them... You waited a minute, two minutes, and felt Kris start to try to move on their own... You forced them to stop. To stay still... and watch...

But after a few minutes, you finally decided it was time to give it back, to show Kris how screwed up they was.

Again using their injured arm, you took Kris's hand to their pants, to their back pocket, and after searching a little, you found it.

A knife. The same one they used to open the dark fountain. The one they scared you with on the first night... Now, you had it in your possession...

You grabbed the knife tightly, wanting it to hurt Kris, and raised it, forcing Kris to extend their other hand... You felt them try to stop you, but it was useless. You raised the knife as high as Kris's body would allow, and then brought it down with all the strength you could muster.

You stabbed their hand. Kris's HP dropped again, this time by 5 points. Good. You could do it again and hurt them more. You forced Kris to take the knife again and twist it into the wound. You felt them desperately trying to stop you... With each movement, Kris lost 1 HP... You did this three times, which was enough to satisfy you. Then, you made them raise the knife and stab their hand again, forming an "X," then finally gave them back control of their body.

Kris pulled you (with their broken arm) off their body, throwing you away so they could focus on removing the knife from their hand.

 

“W-WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!” You loved it. Kris's look of fear was beautiful. You liked seeing them cry and shake. You liked seeing them move away from you. You liked hearing their constant moans of pain and screams. You liked seeing blood drip from their hand as they tried to find the courage to pull out the knife.

 

You felt no pity, only sadistic pleasure and enormous happiness because justice was being served, for you and your friends...

You approached Kris, forcing them to back away further and further until they stumbled and fell. And finally you said it, what you wanted to say so badly...

 

“I'm tired of being nice... Of you mistreating me... Now... I'm going to make your life hell... I'm going to give you back all the pain you caused me... Multiplied... And I'm going to enjoy every moment... Because I hate you... Kris Dreemurr..."

 

That day would be the most painful of Kris's life.

Notes:

Honestly, this was quite entertaining to write and translate... Using “they/them” was complicated because I don't really know how to use them, but anyway, I did some research and all I can say is... It's pretty complicated lol, I don't have the necessary knowledge to use them yet, so if you see anything strange or wrong in the way I used Kris's pronouns, please let me know so I can try to fix it.

Thanks for reading!