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They broke my heart.
Some were worried that after the adventure I would take my gold and leave them. They didn’t want to get attached to me so soon in the adventure. They were worried about being the ones whose hearts were going to be broken. But they are the ones that ended up breaking mine. I never really forgave them for that.
I tried.
They said I was family. Family. They lied. You wouldn’t forget family like that. You wouldn’t let them just walk away and never talk to them. Not even to let me know who from our small and dysfunctional family was still alive. Forgave them when I got back to the Shire, although, I do get a bit bitter when remembering.The children love the stories. Two foolish princes and a moody king. But I’ll never forget how they stood there.
Watched.
Dwarves don’t cry. Made of stone they are. Just like the caves they mined in. Cold. Unfeeling. However, just like the miners if I could, I would go back everyday just to treasure the moments, never once thinking about how dangerous it might be. Forgetting the importance of my own life. Just how like the miners treasure the jewels they dig out. I would look in awe and make sure they shined the brightest. Anything for my family.
I tried.
I tried to do what was best for them, Thorin was taken over by gold lust. They all were. Counting. Hoarding. Not the same dwarves I traveled Middle Earth with. He was marching them towards death. The Battle of the Five Armies.
I tried.Even after the banishment and the threats of death and punishment.
Betrayer. Thief. Lier.
Did you not hire me to steal? I made foolish decisions all throughout the journey. Now was a time for me to do what’s right.
I still walked onto the battlefield beside Gandalf. Anything for family.
Family.