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“What about this one?” Lena asked, presenting her companion with another dress. “It would bring out your eyes!”
Shin looked back at her, her head leaning toward her right just like a confused puppy, and Lena had to bite her tongue to contain a chuckle. She was so adorable sometimes…
To tell the truth, Vladilena Milizé had never been a girl who paid much attention to things like parties and dresses, not back in the Republic at least. Sure, as the heiress of one of the most important houses of San Magnolia, how to present herself in front of other people had been instilled in her throughout her whole life. But that didn’t mean she liked it, nor that she gave it more than two minutes of her time at most. Balls in the Republic had been nothing but a flashy farce, another way to distract its citizens and promote the useless illusion of peace and prosperity as war happened around them. And, specifically for ladies of Lena’s age, these kinds of events were just a glorified marketplace for their families to sell them to the best bidder.
It had been tiresome, and disgusting, honestly, having to attend them out of familial duty while countless died on the battlefield outside the walls.
But, if that was the case, why had she volunteered to help with this? What had changed?
Well, for starters, this was a completely different situation from the parties back in the Republic. The ball was not just another fun activity in their R&R period: it was an exercise for the Eighty-Six, aimed at teaching them how to handle formal situations like this one. Giad was very fond of them, after all.
However, it wasn’t her duty as their commander that had brought her to this situation. Looking after the outfits of her soldiers during their off time wasn’t exactly a part of her work.
But that was the thing. Shin wasn’t just another soldier to her, right?
And the way Shin’s usually indifferent expression twitched with the smallest hint of embarrassment, the way her face turned the slightest shade of pink when Lena suggested one or another dress, was just too amusing and cute to miss. Or to allow anyone else to see it. Lena wanted those gestures to be hers, and hers alone.
Oh, no. This was bad.
Lena knew her feelings for Shin went beyond those of friendship. It was different from the rest of her friends and subordinates, different from what she felt for Annette, who was her closest friend. No, Shin was different, she had been from the very beginning, back when they met each other through the para-RAID two years ago. She had been intriguing, with her silences and hushed words that spoke of resignation and half-truths; admirable in her skills as a soldier and strength to face everything thrown in her direction; endearing in her quiet, wordless kindness towards her.
Then Lena met her in person. And maybe it was the shock after growing up in such a cloistered world of silver and white, but she seemed… so beautiful. Different from everything she had known, in an exciting way. Those tall cheekbones and delicate features, so characteristic of Giad nobility, gave her such a refined beauty, akin to a porcelain doll. And yet, at the same time, Shin exuded the silent strength of a sword: tall, slim, athletic. Mighty.
Such a contrast could only intrigue Lena to no end…
And then there were those aloof crimson eyes that glowed a little warmer when they looked at her, as if they were a bonfire in the middle of a windy night, its embers reaching her and lighting something inside.
How could Lena resist?
She had agonized over this for a long time. As a commander, Lena shouldn't be partial to one of her soldiers. As a woman, she shouldn't feel something like this for another woman… right? It wasn't proper; it wasn’t natural.
Or so she had been taught.
The thing is… She had come to realize that everything she had learned in the Republic was basically a big slop of propaganda. They said people with colors in their bodies were pigs in human form; they proclaimed that they were winning the war against the Legion, and that it wouldn't be long until it was over. Lies, all of it.
Why wouldn't they lie about this, too?
So, Lena had gone over it during the weeks leading up to their trip to Wald. She wanted to have Shin by her side, whatever that meant for them. She didn’t want her to be taken away, not by the Legion, not by anyone else. She wanted Shin to be hers, only hers, forever, if possible.
She wanted to say all of that to her at some point during their trip to Wald. She was aware of the possibility of being rejected, yes, but… these feelings seemed too big, too important to contain for long. Even if nothing came from them, at least having them out in the open would make things easier to handle for her.
So, for now, Lena would just enjoy these peaceful moments with her, for as long as she could.
“What about this?” Lena asked, showing her another dress. Shin’s expression froze as soon as she saw the piece.
“... There’s no way I could wear that neckline to the ball, Lena,” she concluded after a moment of silence. Lena’s eyes went back to the gown, and then to her companion again.
“Aw, it’s not that bad, is it?”
Shin just stared at her and sighed for some reason.
“I don’t think you’re the most qualified to distinguish those things…”
“What do you mean by that?!”