Work Text:
Set in America.
17.03.--32
It was raining, straight up pouring. Why was it raining in DAMN MARCH?! The weather report said it would be sunny today. WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT?? They promised. I was once more fooled and dare I say bamboozled. Shame on me for believing their lies. Anyways, not the point. It was raining and I was GODDAMN WET, as I was not ready for this disgrace to the beautiful skies. Again not the point. I was running for my damn life, when I saw a coffee shop I decided to enter to save myself from this assault. There was one person already ordering, and except for me, the customer, and the cashier there wasn't anyone there. Until the door swung open again, with what seemed like another person that wasn't ready for this assault from the sky.
“Terrible weather huh?”, she asked me. I didn't realise she was talking to me until what felt like a 10 minute pause. When I realised she was talking to me, I turned around and stupidly pointed at myself in a ‘me?’ gesture. And she, stupidly, nodded.
“Uh, yeah, I suppose,” which deadass made that woman at first CHUCKLE, and then FULL ON LAUGH. It could not have been that funny to be honest.
It was kind of annoying, but weirdly endearing. Then it was my turn to order. I ordered a chai latte with whipped cream and cinnamon. I turned around as I was expecting to get judged, and even started saying a sentence that would have been extremely embarrassing down the line.
On the lines of “Don't call me basic just because I like my drink like this, It's a comfort thing,” when she said “I gotta try that,” with a sincere and sort of curious look.
And sure enough when it was her turn to order she just said, “I'll have what she ordered.”
I laughed at that. She seemed a bit offended at that so I explained that I didn't think she was serious.
She sat at my table then and she decided to spark up a conversation. We talked about everything and nothing. An hour and a half later the rain stopped, and I felt kind of disappointed to not have a reason to talk any more. I was a bit awkward as we both needed to leave, but before I could go she stopped and gave me her number.
20.03.--32
I finally got the courage to ask if she wanted to meet at a cafe, she replied, “So it's a date?” And I dumbly replied “I guess it is”. I GUESS IT IS??? What type of response was that? She's gonna think I'm a total weirdo now. I was hoping she'd ghost me or something just to save myself from the embarrassment. She didn't cancel though.
14.06.--32
The first date went well, and so did the one after that, and after that. Our thing seems to be cooking. I found this out on our second date. she asked me if I liked to cook, I thought it was going to go in a weird direction, I said I didn't know how, and she said he'd teach me. she isn't a weirdo after all! It's been a lot of fun. she comes over every weekend and she teaches me how to make a new dish. We meet on other days of course, but those Saturday nights always feel weirdly special. We always talk a lot. Conversation feels easy, and every time she leaves it's like my apartment is weirdly quiet. Like there's a piece missing. I don't know when I started to feel like this, but I can't imagine a time I ever felt any different.
20.10.--32
We were eating dinner. I told her about my plans to visit my family, and she told me about her. I don't know how it happened or why I asked, but suddenly the question “do you want to move in,” is hanging in the air. It seemed to have caught her a bit of guard as she proceeded to choke on the macaroni, but she was smiling nonetheless. she was stuttering and continued to wheeze for air, but still looked like I had just offered her a million dollars and not a shitty apartment to live in. The rest of dinner was spent making plans about the future.
04.11.--33
He finished moving in a while ago. We threw a party for her birthday and it was amazing. Every time I come home I feel calm. It's quiet when I get home as she works late shifts, but it's not the sad kind. Maybe because there's a promise that I'll never truly be alone for long.
31.12–33
He started a new job. It makes her work later shifts. It's weird. I eat alone and go to bed alone. When I wake up he's still sleeping. she needs the sleep, so I don’t wake him. It's quiet now. We hardly ever talk because of our schedules. It's difficult but I’m sure we'll figure something out.
17.02–33
I prepared everything which wasn't prepared the day earlier, by him. We’ve talked about this for a week, our plan to have dinner. It is currently 1 am and she hasn't come back home yet. I didn't receive a text or call. she told me she might have a work emergency. I'm tired. I ate my portion already and kept her out for her to heat up in the microwave. I cleaned the kitchen and went to bed. I didn't notice when she came back. I don't think I cared. The food was good. her pasta can’t be topped.
18.03.--33
We were preparing our anniversary dinner. It was a quiet affair. We had quiet music playing in the background, I think it was jazz. We wanted to make pasta with a tomato sauce. She was rolling and shaping the dough while I cut tomatoes for the sauce. The rhythmic sound of my knife hitting the cutting board was calming. Distracting. she slowly set the pasta down, and quietly, but with a determination said, “We should break up.” My knife stopped.
It should have hurt. Hurt so, so much. But it didn't. It didn't.
Instead there was an acceptance, it was the truth. And so, I replied, “Yeah, it would be for the best,” and continued cutting the tomatoes. she got back to making the pasta. The rest was quiet. There was no screaming, crying, or kicking. No anger or pain. Just words that should have been said a while ago, finally breaking free.
We talked over dinner, talking about trips we took, embarrassing memories. We had a good laugh.
20.03.--33
I helped her move out.
I feel like I set a paper boat on a river, seeing it drift off.