Work Text:
Yeonjun needed him like the oxygen he needed to breathe. Since Soobin left, Yeonjun missed his gentle smile, his big and warm Hands, his Kind eyes that always looked tired. Soobin had kept him going.
he wanted Soobins’s things in his room, he wanted to have the chipped mug that Soobin used every Sunday on his day off, the stupid blanket that he couldn’t let go off since High School and his Digital Camera that had seen everything, their first trip together, their first date and eventually their last.
Choi Soobin left him on a sunny Mai afternoon without any reason aside from wantng to focus on his Work more, Yeonjun had heard about a new serial killer on the news and Soobin also felt like he couldn’t give him what he needed.Yeonjun cut himself that night for the first time in 9 years.
Beomgyu came over later that night just to clean the cuts and keep them bandaged. Not knowing that Yeonjun imagined cutting his throat just to see if Soobin would mourn his death or just pretend that he never existed. Yeonjun begged him not to leave him like everyone else had when they realised that he wasn’t who he pretended to be all the time,but Soobin still had left him there alone and abandoned near the Han River surrounded by happy couples and Cherry Blossoms.
Yeonjun wanted to die that day.
Yeonjun started to work from home starting in June and the summer went away in a blink opening up to October.
The forest was darker than he expected but it was quiet and no one would pester him about his wellbeing or ask him if he was depressed again or if he still wanted to kill himself. October would cure him that’s what he hoped for, the 13th finally came and Yeonjun still wasn’t cured but he would be by the end of the Year if he finally called his therapist back instead of ignoring her, like he had been doing so for the past six months.
It looked so easy for Soobin to leave him, Yeonjun felt the same way he did when he was 13 and his father had left them and he started to blame himself for feeling like he ruined everything, his family,his own life, his relationships by feeling sad all the time.
His 30th birthday had just passed near the end of October. Beomgyu brought cake, Kai brought flowers and Taehyun stayed with him through the night not trusting his hyung to stay unharmed, Yeonjun had a history of harming himself when his feelings overwhelmed him and Tonight they did, just Like on his 13th birthday.
Yeonjun stayed up the whole night waiting for Soobin call.
They all left with telling him that ’’t would get better’’ but nothing would get better until Soobin came back to. Him. Yeonjun really hoped that Soobin would call him even though Yeonjun knew that the younger one was drowning in case files,Wine and working himself tomthe ground.
He still checked his own Instagram obsessively, because he knew that Sobbing had a preference for a small waist and thick thighs, which was the reason why all his social media were full of pictures of him with skirts and high thighs even thought he knew that Soobin had unfollowed him months ago.
Working from home gave him the advantage to wear what ever he wanted and his Work hours were also very flexible, The colder weather also gave him am excuse to wear Knee socks and skirts, he visited the Cafe near Soobin’s office in hopes of getting a glimpse of the Taller since he started to skip their group hangouts he knew that he was the reason for Soobin not attending. Beomgyu would tell them that the Taller ‘‘had to work over time again, a case he was needed for, “, and with new bodies turning up every three days it was no wonder that Soobin had to work so long. which led to him having to skip their hangout.
Soobin didn’t want to leave Yeonjun but he had to for Yeonjun’s safety because he Loved the elder more than life itself and in order to keep him safe and sound he had to let him go. Because he knew thatnYeonjun had become the Target of their towns serial killer.
He wanted the elder to find a partner that would put effort into their Relationship and not be holed up in his office and trying to figure out who murdered a series of Women and Man between 25 and 30 and be able to fulfill his needs.
Soobin saw Yeonjun sitting near the Window of the Cafe near his Office it made his Heart squeeze painfully tight.
He contemplated going inside and telling Yeonjun the Truth but that’s when his Phome rang.