Story of a swan and of the snake who reminded her what love was

by Lapis_stella

Summary:

After the death of her sister Sera feels crushed, and things don't improve when she is tasked with raising the next bringer of joy.
Fortunately a certain newly redeemed winner may just be the one to break her barrier of self loathing and make her realize she's still got a lot left to live for.

Notes:

English is not my first language, so please be kind.
Also I don't own anything, all the rights belong to Vivziepop and Prime Video

Chapter 1: A regretful swan and a caring snake

One could say Sera hadn't been well for a while; if by a while one meant the time between the creation of the world as we know it and the present.

She'd always been an anxious, rigid person, needing everything to go right, and highly critical of herself if she couldn't ensure it, but everything had gotten worse after Lucifer's fall.

Because before being the king of hell and the first fallen angel, he'd been her brother, her best friend, and above all, the angel who'd come into her office with a crooked smile and a snack to make sure she wasn't overworking herself.

He'd been the first seraphim of joy and damn it if he'd done his job well, at least with Sera; they balanced each other like a chemical compound, he made her less anxious, she made him less impulsive and kept him from doing stupid things.

And yet, she hadn't been able to stop him from doing the biggest stupid thing of all.

The archangels and elders told her that if she needed time to recover after what happened, they would give her that, but Sera wasn't ready to admit her feelings and so instead she threw herself immediately into her new work.

Emily was unlike any other seraphim or archangel; her life had begun not with light and adulthood, but with an egg, like most heavenborns.

Lucifer was her younger brother, technically, but he might as well have been her twin, but Emily…she was truly small; when the elders first handed her the egg that contained her, millennia ago, Sera immediately thought it was a joke.

The minuscule blue and silver ball she held in her hands couldn't have contained a seraphim; it barely looked big enough to contain a hamster.

Yet the moment she placed it in a basket in her room that evening, all doubts vanished; she grew so attached to it, so quickly, that she felt crazy, she wished Lucifer were there, because he had always been the one to tell her the names of the feelings she couldn't name.

But she was alone.

So she decided that this was love, even if it made her feel crazy and more anxious than usual.

It was love because she couldn't take her eyes off the egg, and it was love because even though the anxiety radiated down to her legs at the thought, she couldn't wait to see it hatch so she could meet the angel inside.

It was love because even though at times she was completely sure it was all a joke and that the elders had given her a painted stone to look at to prevent her from doing something stupid because of Lucifer's fall, she still couldn't stop caring for it.

She was alone when the egg, which in a few years had grown to the size of a newborn, finally hatched.

Sera was paralyzed as she watched it move, as if the thing inside had suddenly awakened from a long slumber.

She didn't know what to do, where to put her hands, but at the same time, she didn't feel like calling anyone; it was as if there was a barrier in the room preventing her from leaving, because if she did, the illusion would be shattered.

It was something she had to do...or rather, watch alone.

She spent hours staring at the basket, sitting on the floor, afraid that every breath she took would ruin everything.

Her heart was in her throat and her eyes were watering, and she didn't even know why.

At one point, the egg stopped moving for a moment, and Sera feared something had happened.

'There!'
She thought
'I've killed another one of my siblings with my stupidity and ignorance!'

Fortunately, her thoughts turned out to be simply dictated by her anxiety; the new seraphim of joy was born healthy as a fiddle just a few minutes later.

A tiny, graceful thing, with a serene face and closed eyes, a few white hairs already on her head and three pairs of ragged wings.

Sera almost cried when she realized how much she resembled her.

She gently tried to lift her from the remains of the egg, and immediately her little face wrinkled and she began to cry.

Sera wished she could do the same, but instead she held her close, trying to calm her, cradling her in her hands the way she had seen Eve do with one of her newborns.

It only made the little one cry more.

Sera's heart broke a little more for every single second she didn't calm down.

She never knew how long she remained in that position, but Michael swore it must have been hours, at least until Gabriel happened to pass by the room and, hearing the new seraphim's cries, went to call Raphael.

When the archangel of healing took the child from her hands, Sera felt as if her heart had been ripped out, but fortunately she was soon too distracted by everything the other angel was telling her to continue ruminating on the sensation.

Raphael, who was known for always going on for way too long on his medical tangents, kept saying things about the room temperature, the egg temperature, and the proper care of wings, but Sera just wanted to tear the little girl from his arms and put her back in hers.

To this day Sera doesn't know whether what happened next was a simple spasm of the little girl's wings that pushed her into her big sister's arms, or a deliberate choice of her own.

Probably the former.

Almost certainly the former.

But in that moment, the only thing Sera could do was hold the new seraphim to her chest, whispering simply,
"Emily...eager..."

The name stuck.

For centuries to come, Sera continued to fear for Emily's safety every day.

Her name fit her perfectly, because everything she did was done with extreme eagerness; she began to fly before she could walk, causing her sister to suffer more than a few heart attacks.

And, God bless her, when she discovered her role as a bringer of joy, she didn't stop helping everyone for a week straight, never once stopping to rest, dragging Sera along, who desperately needed a nap even though she knew it was biologically impossible.

But at least the two sisters spent those days together; the real problem began when Emily grew old enough to manage her work alone.

At that point, Sera could do nothing but wait for the seraphim to come home, which sometimes didn't happen for days.

Now she would have given anything to just sit in her office and wait for her return, even though it had once given her indescribable anxiety.

Because now, Emily would never come back.

Emily was…

No!

Sera couldn't bring herself to say it.

Her sister…had perished in hell, after exhausting herself trying to prevent that TV sinner's bomb from exploding.

Her little Emily had sacrificed herself for everyone else, as Sera always knew she would one day do.

She didn't declare war on those filthy sinners only because she knew Emily would turn in her grave if she knew Sera had started another holy war in her name.

In fact, in her memory, she began a collaboration with hell for redemption and all that bullshit, but she appointed Abel to handle the negotiations.

She couldn't look the monsters who had taken Emily from her in the eye… and with her, a part of her heart; perhaps the last good one, died.

This time, she forced herself to take a break; well, she called it a break, but the archangels called it 'self-imposed punishment.'

The seven, in fact, called her into the courtroom after the third week that she had spent doing nothing but staring at the ceiling of her office, thinking about all the times she had failed her younger siblings.

Even in the courtroom, those thoughts were decidedly louder than the voices of the other angels.

There was the time when Lucifer had told her to act as lookout in case Michael arrived while he went into his office to add his project to the Archangel's files, but she, seeing him arrive, had confessed everything for fear of sinning.

"Sera, we know that the loss of Emily has affected you deeply..."

Once, Emily had returned exhausted after spending the whole day comforting children who had died in a car accident, who could only have been mentally only a few years younger than her, and Sera had barely deigned to say hello.

"Believe me, it affected us too. We all loved her immensely."

Once, Lucifer had shown her his new creation, a real animal he had made with his own hands, he had called it a duck, and had asked her to help him propose it to Gabriel; Sera had said yes, but then hadn't shown up for the meeting for fear the archangel would think she was stupid.

"But staying locked in the palace doesn't seem like a healthy option for you. This self-punishment isn't productive."

Emily had once asked if she could sleep with her for no particular reason, and that night she'd asked if she would have loved her even if her face was melted; she'd thought it was a ridiculous question and didn't answer, and when she'd discovered that her little sister had spent the previous day caring for a winner who'd been thrown a bucket of acid in the face in life and whose mother had never been able to look at her again, she hadn't really apologized.

"That's why we thought we'd give you a task that might help you distract yourself."

Lucifer had come to her a few days before the fall, confessed everything, how he'd fallen in love with Lilith, that beautiful woman who Adam called difficult in front of the archangels, and Sera had turned her back on him, telling him he needed to get all that bullshit out of his head and go back to his place.

The huge, ever-too-soft eyes of her brothers melted and blurred in Sera's head when she suddenly found herself holding a small object in her hands.

The heart that had never before did it, skipped a beat.

"No! No! Please, not again!"

There was an egg in her hands; red and white, this time, but still too small and scary.

Gabriel, ever the kindest, smiled at her.
“I know it seems impossible now, but I'm sure you'll care for and love this new baby as you did Emily!”

“And besides, we need a new Seraphim of Joy, and you raised one once, so you can do it again.”
Micheal added, in his unwavering tone.

Sera took another look at the egg, lowered her head, and nodded.

There was no choice.

That evening, for the first time since her... disappearance, Sera entered Emily's room; it was exactly as she had left it before going to hell: the bed still unmade, parchments opened everywhere, an army of stuffed animals on the shelves, and in a corner, next to the bed, the basket that had contained her a few million years before.

The seraphim of joy used it to rest her notebooks; on it still lay the soft white blanket and the stuffed sheep that Gabriel had given to the high Seraphim a few lifetimes ago.

She took the basket but left both the blanket and the sheep on the floor; she then placed the egg in the basket on a desk she couldn't see in her office.

She then went back to work.

For the following months, that was her routine: work, work, and more work.

Paperwork to sign, projects to approve, and Winners and Heavenborns demanding to come into her office with pointless complaints.

Those she simply sent to the archangels to deal with.

She saw very few people during that time and never spoke to anyone, not even the angels she encountered in the corridor between her office and her room.

She no longer read, even though it had once been her secret favorite pastime; now all the incredible stories about humans that had always intrigued her so much seemed pointless and ridiculous.

How could she get excited about the incredible scientific and technological discoveries of the nineteenth century when her sister would never again be there to spy on her reading and tease her passion for the subject?

What was the point of talking to anyone when her sister would never be able to do so again?

What was the point of caring for the egg when her sister would never meet the new angel that would hatch from it?

What was the point of continuing to live when her sister could never do so again?

Some days she held her breath for hours for no particular reason, she couldn't die of asphyxiation, but it made her feel sympathetic to Emily.

At least for a few hours, neither of them breathed.

Getting out of bed was a nightmare, and the only reason Sera forced herself to do it was because it hurt.

One of the few times she actually spoke to anyone was to ask Saint Peter and Abel if they wanted anything that once belonged to Emily; once they both said no, she set everything on fire.

She started with the parchments, then the journals, the tote bags, and the cute blue leather one Emily called her work bag.

She threw the glass jars containing candy and cookies, the blankets and pillows, into the flames, and left the stuffed animals for last.

When even the last stupid, smiling teddy bear was nothing but ashes in the living room fireplace, she went to sleep.

At some point, Gabriel gave her a new blanket, this time red, and a stuffed chicken for the new egg.

Sera sent them to join Emily's stuffed army as soon as the archangel turned the corner.

The scratches were a recent thing.

Sera didn't even remember how it had started, maybe just an itch from a draft or something, but the moment her long, bird-like claws made contact with the soft skin of her face, something clicked in her head.

It was liberating to see her internal pain exposed; every time the air hit the new, shallow scratches on her cheeks, it was as if an untameable fire was ignited within her, and for a few moments the thought that Emily was no longer with her faded enough to allow Sera to focus on something else.

It started with her cheeks but soon spread to her wrists, then her forearms, her neck, and finally her stomach.

No one commented, as far as she knew they didn't even know, but then again, she wasn't really listening to what people had to say about her.

Sometimes she woke up with gold-stained sheets and pillows, or let a few drops of her ichor run down the documents, but the elders hadn't mentioned it yet, so she continued.

This had been going on for a year when Sera heard a knock on her door.

Perhaps once she would have been annoyed by the intrusion, but now it was difficult for her to feel anything unless she was pressing on a scratch.

"Come in."
She simply said, her voice hoarse, as she finally broke her long, self-imposed silence.

The snake slithered in, and the high seraphim really wished she could give a damn about it, but instead she simply asked,
"What are you doing here?"

In her head, she wanted to sound stiff and perhaps angry, but in reality, the words came out of her mouth in the voice of an apathetic woman she barely recognized.

“I'm here because…uh, Abel sent me here to check on you. He's swamped with work at the moment, but…he wanted to make sure you were okay!”

The woman's heart sank a little at the thought.

She wondered if Abel was so caught up in the negotiations that he couldn't come and check on her himself; she had always felt immense affection for the boy, even if he sometimes exasperated her with his naiveté and lack of inclination for violence.

"I'm fine..."
She simply said, her voice always too flat to sound genuine.

The snake tilted its head.
"Are you completely sure?”

Sera nodded, feeling instantly tired; this was the longest conversation she'd had in a year, and it was leaving her feeling unbalanced.

"Okay... if you're sure, then I'd go and..."
The winner was about to leave the room when his eyes fell on something behind Sera.

The woman followed his gaze, and that was when she noticed it for the first time.

There was a crack on the egg; it wasn't big, but it was enough to make Sera feel her first real emotion in a year.

What had happened?

Had the egg fallen while she was too busy ruining her skin?

Had she placed it on the desk with too much strength?

Had she accidentally bumped it while writing?

Was it because she hadn't put a blanket at the bottom of the basket?

A million questions crowded her head, and the only thing Sera could do in response was go back to scratching her neck too hard.

Suddenly, however, two hands took hers.

"Breathe!"

It wasn't a command, more of a worried suggestion, but a very urgent one, from someone who knew what they were doing.

Sera tried to obey, but even though her hands were now in front of her, she still felt them around her neck.

"Okay...it's not working...so, hey...can you please look at me?"

The seraphim's eyes were still glued to the egg, but she forced herself to move them slowly and painfully toward the source of the voice.

Sir Pentious was looking at her with large, worried eyes.

"Ms Sera...can you...can you try breathing again? Slowly, this time, one long breath in and then one out."

The woman felt stupid: she was among the most important people in heaven and needed some random winner to remind her how to breathe; yet she forced herself to follow his instructions, because her head felt like it would explode otherwise.

After a few minutes of that constant inhalation and exhalation, the woman finally felt as if breathing and seeing clearly weren't an insurmountable task anymore.

"Are you feeling better now?"
Sir Pentious's voice was so soft, so concerned, and she didn't deserve it in the slightest, not a monster like her who was so caught up in her own dramas that she didn't realize her charge was compromised.

She shook her head before her brain could remind her that she was supposed to be the strong one and that admitting weakness was dangerous.

Sir Pentious slowly approached the egg, taking it in his hands with extreme delicacy, even though Sera flinched anyway, and began examining it as if he knew what he was doing.

Maybe he really did know, because after a few moments he smiled at the seraphim.

"It's all right."
He explained
"It must have been a sudden temperature change, it can easily be fixed with a little wax, I have as much as you want in my room.
I'll go get it if you want."

Sera nodded without speaking.

The Winner tried to place the egg in her hands, to go get the wax, but the woman still couldn't convince herself to hold it.

"You hold it, I'll walk with you."
She exclaimed, surprising even herself.

She couldn't hold the egg.

She no longer trusted herself with her siblings on principle, but even less so when she'd just had a sort of respiratory crisis, her, who didn't need to breathe, but at the same time, she couldn't let the egg get out of her watch; it was still her job to protect it.

So she followed Sir Pentious to his room and kept her eyes fixed on the snake as he covered the red and white shell with a thin layer of wax.

His hands were as steady as a surgeon's, his gaze extremely focused as he peered at the egg through a large bronze lens to ensure even the smallest of holes were covered.

It was fascinating to watch, and Sera found herself so mesmerized that she had to shake her head to remember where she was when he turned to show her the finished work.

"You're good with eggs..."
She simply commented.

The man blushed slightly, trying to pass the egg to Sera
"Thank you...I've learned a lot trying to take proper care of my Egg Boiz."

The woman tilted her head, trying to ignore his silent request to take the egg, she had heard the man mention his "Egg Boiz" before, but she hadn't quite figured out what they were; perhaps because her body was finally rebelling against the solitude she'd imposed, she asked,
"Are they real eggs? I figured they were like your minions."

Sir Pentious realized the high seraph wasn't gonna hold the egg, so he carefully placed it on the table behind him, explaining,
"Oh, no, they are my Minions, and also real eggs, with legs and arms, I made them with my own hands!"

He said the last part with such pride that it made the high seraphim smile slightly.

However, very soon, a complete, awkward silence fell over the room, and Sera remembered everything.

She immediately felt a pang in her chest. What did she think she was doing?
Emily would never be able to laugh at anyone's antics again.

How could she think she had the right to?

She looked at the floor and went to pick up the egg.

"Thanks again."
She just said.

Sir Pentious tilted his head, even the eye on his hat saddened
"Did I do something wrong?"
He asked softly.

Sera shook her head, pausing in the doorway.

"No, I just remembered I still have some duties to perform."

The winner nodded, and Sera thought he would just wait there, but as she was already halfway down the corridor, the first redeemed soul reached her.

"I, um...I was just thinking, I don't want to bother you or anything, but...what animal is in this egg?"

Sera pursed her lips
"Not an animal, an angel, a new seraphim of joy."

All the eyes on Pentious's body widened
"Do angels come from eggs?"
Then he realized her mistake
"Oh my...I didn't mean...I certainly didn't mean to seem rude..."

Sera shook her wings, her frustration already fading; she was too tired to be offended by a small mistake
"It doesn't matter, you're human, obviously you couldn't have known that."

Sir Pentious gave her another of his crooked smiles, twisting his hat a little with his hands
"Oh, okay...look...could I, um...ask you some more questions? I'm fascinated by this, and..."

The high seraphim paused, rubbing her forehead for a moment; she was about to say something when Sir Pentious exclaimed
"I can, um...repay you for your time; caring for an egg is hard, constantly turning it and making sure the temperature is just right, and...everything else...I could do it for you while you work!"

The woman nodded before the man could see her expression
"Then come by early tomorrow morning..."

When she locked herself in her office, she felt as if she'd just been beaten.

Did you have to do all those things?

She'd never done them, not even with Emily.

Oh, dear, was that why she hadn't been strong enough?

Well, apparently she was an even shittier big sister than she'd realized.

She didn't sleep that night, instead searching her entire room for anything she could use to make it seem like she wasn't a complete failure of a sister.

Finally, she managed to find an old pillow without even a pillowcase, just the right size to fit in the basket, and from the ashes of the fireplace, which she hadn't lit since her meltdown, she was able to salvage a white teddy bear.

Half a teddy bear, but it was something.

She placed them next to the egg, and the image made her want to sink into hell.

The egg was all mended with wax, looking like a shapeless mass, the pillow was frayed and felted, and the teddy bear...maybe she should have removed it before Sir Pentious arrived the next morning.

She didn't, in the end.

She wasn't even tired, or exhausted; neither words were adequate to describe the bone-crushing feeling she felt inside.

So she gave up trying to make herself presentable, moved the basket out of her sight, and stared into space.

She really intended to go to bed at some point, but morning caught her off guard, and so did Sir Pentious, who knocked on the door at the crack of dawn.

She wanted to huff, but she was the one who asked him to come early, right?

She opened the door and, without looking, pointed out where she'd put the egg, then spent the next few hours pretending to have work to do.

The winner didn't ask her any questions that day, probably believing she was truly busy or sensing her state of mind.

Things went on like this for months; Sir Pentious cared for the egg with a delicacy Sera would never have expected from someone as clumsy as he was; every movement seemed calculated to the millimeter and executed with all the attention in the world.

When he wasn't looking over the egg, the man usually sat knitting, Sera wouldn't have expected that from someone like him, but he was calm and didn't bother her; so she let the year slip into this new routine.

After a few months, the winner had even made a blanket for the egg; white and soft, and after a few more months he added a crocheted rabbit of the same color.

Sera's heart sank a little deeper with each object that appeared inside; it reminded her so much of Emily's basket.

The new routine continued for almost two years, before Sera realized that Sir Pentious hadn't actually asked her a single question yet, surprisingly, she was the one to break the silence
"Didn't you have questions for me?"

Sir Pentious tilted his head in that delicate, adorably ignorant way that somehow drove Sera crazy, stopping hus knitting, he simply said
"Well, yes, but you always seem so tired, you spend all your time rubbing the bridge of your nose and looking through the same documents over and over again...it never seemed like the right time, and well, I'm still learning a lot just by observing!"

Sera nodded.

That was perfect; she didn't feel like talking anyway.

The man was surprisingly observant.

That trait soon backfired on her, or perhaps it came to her aid; It depends on how you look at it.

Sera's scratching fits on her body continued, but they had been relegated to her wrists, so Sir Pentious would never notice.

Or so Sera thought.

It had been three months into the third year and that day and the high seraphim couldn't stop scratching; usually the urge only lasted a few minutes at most, but at the moment it was as if she was compelled to continue.

The sensation of her skin peeling away under her nails was the most satisfying thing in existence, the dripping ichor felt like a cascade of consequences that filled her with a purpose.

It was all her fault that Lucifer had fallen, that Emily...was no longer with her, and if no one had the intention of punishing her adequately, she would do so herself.

That day was the fall’s anniversary and Emily's birthday, and while those two events normally canceled each other out, making Sera always feel inadequate, too happy to remember one and too sad to celebrate the other, since her little sister was gone, the day had been nothing but a black hole of nothingness.

Sera woke up already hoping it would be over quickly.

Abel, who immediately confronted her outside her office that morning, tried to invite her to a sort of wake to remember the seraphim of joy, but she vehemently denied the invitation and went to lock herself in the office.

She didn't even notice Sir Pentious arrive, which is why she continued to scratch her wrist, and then...her neck.

She couldn't help it; more than anything, she wanted to be mortal and taste her own blood, while being suffocated by it.

She wanted to die and join her sister.

It was just as the spiral was about to peak that she was interrupted by a gentle voice and a light touch on her shoulder.

"Ms Sera...are you okay?"

Sir Pentious was looking at her with pity, and Sera just wanted to scream for him to stop, that she didn't deserve comfort, that she had to be punished, why wasn't anyone punishing her?
Someone should raise a sword of angelic steel and find out if seraphim could be killed the same way exorcists could.

"Ms Sera, you're bleeding..."

The woman came back to reality with a half-shudder, removing her hands from her neck only for fear that otherwise the winner would do it for her, which would be humiliating beyond belief.

She waited a moment, wondering if Sir Pentious would ask more questions, to which she would have to answer with lies, or if the man would return to guarding the egg now that he'd done his good deed for the day.

To her surprise, he did neither.

Instead, the snake simply handed the woman a small yellow rubber device, at which Sera raised an eyebrow.

“It’s a rubber band.”
Sir Pentious quickly explained
“You know…I had a friend who…used to hurt herself, like you…but she told me she quit because she started wearing a rubber band around her wrist and snapping it instead of cutting hetself…it’s still hurting oneself, but… less addicting…it’s like an intermediate step to quitting…”

The high seraphim blinked so fast her eyelashes looked like crazed dragonflies.

She wanted to tell the snake that she had no intention of quitting, that the whole point was to hurt herself and see how far she could push her immortal body before it finally destroyed itself.

But instead, she put the rubber band on her wrist and nodded seriously; at least while he was there, she could indulge him.

After all, he had been nothing but good to her, and he had helped her endlessly with the egg, she could pretend not to want to kill herself, at least in front of him.

From that moment on, the high seraphim began to swap the urge to scratch herself for snapping the rubber band whenever the snake was around, and even though she thought it was ridiculous, she unconsciously began to swap the gestures even when he wasn't present.

Slowly, only the scars from the times she'd gone too deep remained on her slender wrists, but no new wounds arose.

That, the third, was also the year she and Sir Pentious actually began to talk.

Perhaps it was because the snake noticed that she finally seemed to feel more relaxed, or perhaps, on the contrary, because he had noticed her self-destructive tendencies and wanted to help, but the fact is, one day he simply showed up and, instead of walking straight to the egg, asked
"So, can I ask you those questions?"

Sera nodded.

"So, from what I've noticed, the egg behaves very similarly to a bird's egg, is that the case with all angel eggs?"

“Yes, from what I've been told by various winners, Heavenborn eggs function in every way like those of your mortal species of birds; but, varying from egg to egg, they have characteristics similar to different species…”

From that day on, their conversations continued, and predictably, they quickly strayed from that initial thematic focus.

“So this isn't the first time you've handled an egg, you told me?”

“No, no, I did it with…my sister before…”
It was still difficult to say her name out loud, especially when almost no one did it anymore.

“Emily was your sister?”

“Of course, what did you think we were?”

“Oh, um…forgive me for the mistake, I believed that, given your behavior towards her, she was your daughter…”

“Oh, dear, no…someone like me could never have a daughter, I'm too busy…”
And I'd suck at being one
“I already spend so much time working, if I married someone and had a child with them, I really wouldn't know how to have five minutes to myself.
Even with…Emily, I struggled to find time to read.”

“Oh, so you read? I've never seen you do that!”

“I haven't done it much lately…”

“What do you like to read?”

It was strange, for once, when the high seraphim spoke of her passion for technology and human discoveries, her interlocutor, instead of trying to quickly change the subject or smiling tensely, knowing he'd be bored if she talked any further, widened his eyes.

"Well, I happen to have been a great inventor in 19th-century London... but, you already know that...what do you think of our theory of using steam?
I've been informed by more recent arrivals that steam has been ousted by oil, and I find that ridiculous! I mean, surely production with steam is more limited, but at least it's more ethical, right?”

The woman frowned and for the first time in her life actually spoke about what she otherwise only read
"I think oil isn't inherently unethical if used in moderation.
I mean, I think steam is great, but at the same time, it could reach its full potential if combined with something else.
Strength in numbers, right?"

Slowly, it became the norm for the two of them to simply talk about whatever was on their minds.

Sir Pentious talked about inventions, both those he'd created in life and in hell, and sometimes he even brought to the office the projects he'd managed to recreate in Heaven, where he and Sera would look at them and criticize them.

"I think you should swap those screws for smaller ones at that connection point, so they're harder to unscrew.
It's a constantly moving part, better not to risk it!"

Every time words like that, true, targeted, and constructive, came out of the seraphim's mouth, Pentious's eyes grew as big as saucers and filled with stars
"Oh, my, you're a true genius! How could I not have thought of that, and how could you have never been an inventor?
You're wasted here being a bureaucrat!"

Each time, the woman simply smiled awkwardly; perhaps it was a little sad, but no one had ever paid her a compliment since Lucifer's fall.

If they weren't discussing inventions, the snake was probably trying to convince Sera to read Charles Dickens.

"I swear, that guy was the best writer ever! He really understood people!"

Normally, the woman would bite her lip a little, making excuses
"I don't know, I met him at some point, and he was...a weird guy, can we read Jane Austen instead?
She really understood people..."

"Are you suggesting that Jane Austen is better than Charles Dickens?"

"What if I was?"

And so Pentious read Emma, and Sera read Oliver Twist, and they both absolutely hated the other's book and argued about it for weeks.

Unable to come to a conclusion, they went through the entire bibliography of both authors, trying to prove to the other that their author was superior.

Neither of them actually changed their opinion, but Sera had to admit she hadn't had this much fun in ages; she didn't even care that much about Jane Austen, but it was nice to be able to debate with Pentious, pretend to be upset by his opinions, and express her own.

Perhaps she'd never had this much fun.

After that initial argument, the two continued their debate, talking now about how they both thought Dante was overrated and Shakespeare too mistreated by modern audiences, and they continued recommending each other books, both fiction and non-fiction.

They ended up starting a sort of book club just for the two of them, and now Sera was getting out of bed a little more easily, thanks to the thought of having to discuss Victor Frankenstein's sudden and decidedly hasty change of heart with Pentious.

They reached a point where the man felt comfortable enough to joke with her
"Well, we're not putting Paradise Lost on our must-read list because I wouldn't like to see you cry."

He immediately went red after saying that, apologizing profusely, but Sera didn't feel the slightest bit offended, but rather, seen, as she had never felt seen in her entire life.

But what made the woman realize she truly felt completely at ease with the snake was that when the two were combing through a book list, looking for something new to read, they stumbled upon 'My Brilliant Friend' and Sera said, almost without thinking.

"Oh, delete that right now! Emily read the first one and cried for days! I had to stop her from finding out there were three sequels!"

It was the first time she'd spoken about Emily so casually, mentioning something she'd done without her heart sinking at the thought that she'd never be able to do it again.

And she didn't even notice until the evening.

She still snapped the rubber band on her arm every now and then, but most of the time she was too engrossed in her conversations to remember she was even wearing it.

She was better.

She was better, and she didn't feel guilty about it.

It was only natural that with all the hours the two spent together, sooner or later the topics would turn to their lives, and for once neither felt judged for their choice of solitude.

Finally, there was someone else who understood why they had made that choice and why that same choice now felt too tight for them.

Chapter 2: A hurt swan, a compassionate snake and a little lamb

They were halfway through their fifth year when Sir Pentious walked into the office one day with literal stars in his eyes.

“Oh, Sera! The best thing that could have happened to me has happened!”

The woman tilted her head with a smirk
“Did the archangels finally lift the ban on building potentially explosive machines?”

The man shook his head, crossing his arms in a playful manner
“No, that would require a miracle, the kind I don't think is possible even here in Heaven…”

“Okay, okay, so what happened?”

“Ms. Bomb! She got redeemed! She's here now!”

The woman smiled, letting her friend ramble on incessantly about the woman he apparently loved more than anything, well, not as much as he loved his Egg Boiz, but that was different!

And if her heart felt a little heavy at the thought that Pentious would now be spending less time with her, well...she had the right to be a little sad, because that's all she was: sad!

Certainly not jealous.

She didn't even know why that word had come to mind.

Envy is a sin, and she certainly wasn't a sinner.

Even so, she found herself rereading Great Expectations that night, even though she didn't like it, because at least she understood it, and she was pretty sure she couldn't say the same about that girl; and how could she have redeemed herself if she still had more bombs on her body than there had been at all in heaven before her arrival?

Okay...maybe she was a little jealous, but only because she hadn't had a friend in so long, and besides...she could afford it a little.

She had always been a paragon of virtue, and it's not as if she would go flaunting that sentiment around heaven.

It was just an unpleasant feeling that occasionally warbled in her chest, no one would ever know it was there but her.

And Pentious hadn't completely abandoned her, even though that had been exactly what Sera had feared in the beginning.

The man still came into her office early in the morning, talked to Sera, told her about the progress he'd made in their shared readings, they chatted together about this and that, and the man kept making sure the egg was at the perfect temperature the whole time.

“When will it hatch?”

He asked one day, as he was delicately placing it back in the basket.

Sera tilted her head.

“The incubation process it's about seven years, give or take a month, at least that's what Raphael told me.
Emily took something like seven years and nine months, but she always liked to wait until the last minute to do things.”

“Wow, so it will be here in a year and a half! Have you thought of a name yet?”

Sera bit her lower lip
"No, actually... I mean, I don't even know if it's a boy or a girl."

"Which one would you prefer?"

Sera thought about it; she honestly had no idea, either way, they would remind her of at least one of her siblings.

She shrugged
"Maybe a girl, my family has enough men already."

Pentious smiled
"Jane."
He said only.

Sera rolled her eyes, laughing
"Yeah, sure!"

For a while, they continued to throw names at each other in that ironic way, some of them might have actually been good, but Sera was taking it more as a game than anything else; she was sure the right name would come to her once the angel was born, as it had for Emily.

In short, things didn't change nearly as much as Sera had feared, and sure, she still didn't like Cherri, but at least she could spend the hours she now had free to actually get back to fulfilling her duties as a seraphim that she had neglected in previous years.

Not that anyone had said anything to her; she'd never realized how bureaucracy was seriously nothing more than a formality in heaven.

And what's more...Pentious seemed happy when he returned from those dates with his girlfriend, and after all, that's what friends did, right?
They were happy for each other's joys.

And they were sad for each other's misfortunes.

And they forgot their own problems to make sure the others’ were solved.

Sera truly realized that one evening.

She was tidying up her office, already on her way to her room, just making sure the egg was in the right position for the night, when she heard the door open.

She didn't even have to turn around to see who it was, but that didn't mean she wasn't worried
"Pen! Aren't you supposed to be with Cherri? You told me you were going to her house for dinner, right?"

The winner shuffled pathetically to his usual corner, his eyes watery, the one on his hat crying uncontrollably
"She left me..."
He only said.

Sera put a hand to her mouth; she expected to have to repress harsh words about the former bomber, but none came to mind at that moment; she was too busy thinking of how to console the man.

She couldn't think of anything, so that evening she simply sat next to him as he explained exactly how things had happened
"She says we have nothing in common...that if we find a way to do it here, we can still be arch nemesis, but that it will never work between us...and also…she likes someone else...I should have seen it...Husk and her were awfully close lately..."

Despite their now deep friendship, the two didn't touch each other often; Pentious must have realized that Sera wasn't the cuddly type, and it was true, even if only half true; she wasn't used to being the one to initiate hugs, caresses, and the like.

Everyone saw her as an inaccessible figure, the high seraph, always serious and stiff, and only her siblings allowed themselves to be openly affectionate with her, but those two were cuddly beyond compare, and so the woman never felt like doing anything but reciprocating their affection.

But that evening, for the first time in her thousand-years long life, the high seraphim leaned over and wrapped her arms around Sir Pentious, who, after a moment's hesitation, returned the embrace.

The woman wasn't sure exactly what to do during a hug, when to let go or how tightly to hold, so she let her friend do as he felt, and because of that they remained in that position for...probably longer than would have been considered appropriate.

Finally, it was Pentious who let go.

With a shy smile, he looked at Sera
"Thank you..."
He said softly, his eyes still shining.

Sera didn't know why, but she felt compelled to reach out and wipe away his tears.

Their faces were closer than they'd ever been; Sera could feel Pentious's breath, warm on her face.

She closed her eyes, just for a moment, and leaned toward the winner.

It was quick.

The man's scaly face was rough, but it felt perfect against the woman's soft lips.

The kiss lasted only a few seconds, but Sera swore she'd never felt so good.

Suddenly, they broke apart, both their eyes widening.

And then...they laughed.

"Sorry...sorry! I don't know what came over me!"
The woman exclaimed between laughs, covering her face so as not to show how red she had become.

“No, no, it's okay…we were just…we got carried away!”
The man tried to rationalize, even though he was smiling himself.

He slowly removed her hands from her face
“It didn't mean anything…we can forget it if you want.”

The woman nodded, but said nothing.

Pentious realized she needed some alone time; he stood up, smiled at her one last time, and then said softly,
“Good night, Sera…”

Only then did the seraphim find the courage to murmur
“Good night to you too, Pentious…”

The man walked out, leaving Sera alone and reeling.

“What the fuck did I do…?”
She asked, more to herself than to God.

It couldn't have really happened; she must have just woken up from a nightmare.

She looked around, took a deep breath, and then headed for her room.

Pentious was right: they could forget everything.

No, they had to forget everything.

That night she fell into a restless, dreamless sleep.

She woke up more tired than when she'd gone to bed, but she forced herself to get up; she wouldn't ruin the only good thing she'd had since...since Emily's death, she wouldn't lose all the progress she'd made because of a stupid impulse.

She wasn't her sister, nor her brother.

She was the wise one, the one who thought twice before doing something stupid and irrational.

She slipped into her office and waited for Pentious to arrive; for a moment she feared he wouldn't show up, but instead he did, with a smile and a gift.
"I didn't sleep much last night...so...I made this for you..."

The seraphim smiled at the mechanical bird the man placed on her finger, and with that she understood that they were okay, that the night before really shouldn't have meant anything other than what they wanted.

Their routine returned to normal.

And if sometimes, while the two exchanged books, their hands rested on each other a little too long, or if they hugged a little too tightly when it was time to say goodbye, well...it was only because they were very close friends.

And then Sera found out everything.

And for the third time, it was as if the universe had stopped spinning.

During the previous two days, the high seraphim had asked Pentious not to come by, or at least to remain silent in his corner if he did, because even though the bureaucracy in heaven was a formality, sometimes those formalities had to be fulfilled.

She wasn't really looking at what he signed too carefully; she only read every other line and approved everything without exception.

It wasn't as if anyone would suggest anything negative, after all, not there in heaven.

Finally, halfway through the third day, the woman had managed to catch up on all the documents and patents and now only had to hand them over to the archangels.

Normally, she would have asked someone to bring it to them, but she wanted to pick up Pentious after, because seriously, they absolutely had to talk about that Elsa Morante woman and probably cross all the Italian books off their list, because seriously, there was no way they were all that depressing!

She left the stack of papers outside the courtroom, in the designated box, and would have left that very moment if Gabriel hadn't stopped her.

Sera forced a smile.
"Hi..."

The archangel wasn't one for small talk and immediately took Sera's hands, looking at her like a vase you want to make sure isn't broken; or so it seemed to the seraphim
"Oh, look at you, you've got some color back on your face! And you don't have those ugly marks on your face anymore, oh goodness!"

So they knew…

"Oh yes, you're really back, our Sera, and you're even smiling more.
Michael really had a great idea convincing that snake to be your friend! I really have to stop doubting him, because even if they're a little controversial at times, he always has the best intuitions!"

To Sera, it seemed that Gabriel hadn't even realized he'd said anything wrong, beyond the compliments he'd paid the seraphim, but he was nothing if not a man of too many words, almost always the wrong ones.

Sera didn't even say goodbye, instead heading toward the office where she knew she'd find Micheal.

She wasn't wrong.

The archangel was sitting at his desk, intent on signing who knows what, and didn't even raise his head to look the woman in the eye.
"So Gabriel spoke too much once more?"

The woman felt herself fill with anger in a way she'd never felt before.

Her heart was broken, the last four years of her life a charade orchestrated by the archangels, and that asshole Michael wouldn't even deign to look at her.

She wanted to scream, cry, and yell like a child, but he was still the high seraphim, so through gritted teeth, but without shouting, she said
"Is it true then? You asked Pen...that winner to come be my friend? Was it all a lie? Did you promise him something in return? What?"

He didn't answer, but the way he looked at her was enough for her to understand.

Suddenly she wasn't angry anymore, but she felt broken; so all the days she'd spent with Pentious didn't matter at all?

The compliments he'd given her, their conversations, that night...had it all been a plan orchestrated to 'make her feel better'?

To convince her to forget about her sister's...disappearance?

To make her go back to being a perfect pawn in their sick chess game?

She forced herself to hold back tears, only to realize she didn't feel the need to cry.

The emptiness in her chest, in her head, had returned.

Looking at the floor, she went back to her room and hid under the covers.

That same evening, she set fire to the blanket and the rabbit he'd made for the egg, to their silly shared projects, to all the books they'd read together, and finally to the mechanical bird.

She threw it into the fireplace with such force that it split in two on impact, but the voice box wasn't damaged, not immediately, and it continued chirping until the flames melted it too, making the song nothing more than an eerie creaking sound.

She didn't go to her office the next day.

Or the day after that.

Or the day after that.

Time no longer mattered, days blended into nights.

Sera didn't sleep, she just stayed in her bed, lying on her side, staring at the wall, her wings shielding her from the outside world.

She was scratching herself again, this time not to feel anything, because she was completely incapable of doing so anymore, but to keep her hands busy.

And to punish herself.

Because that time she had truly been the ultimate idiot, how could she have thought she could be friends with a former sinner?

How could she have kissed him?

Her lips were constantly golden because, more than anything else, that was the body part she tormented the most, biting into it until her teeth broke the flesh, and her lips became properly chapped and then tore the flesh off.

She was dirty.

She was unworthy.

She deserved nothing but eternal damnation and punishment.

He came to visit her one day; one of the firsts.

He approached the bed, and Sera didn't even need to turn around to know he was playing with his tail.

"Sera...I..."

"Don't apologize, I don't care about your apologies..."

"Okay...I'll go then, but first let me tell you that..."

"The only thing I want to know from you is what they promised you? What value does my life gold for the archangels, exactly?"

"Sera, please..."

"No! You know what? Don't answer, I don't care, just go away!"

She must have shouted, because he left.

A vein popped on her wrist one day, she didn't even know she had them; a golden waterfall flowed out of it, flowing until Gabriel noticed it, one day when he came to check on her, and he called Raphael to treat her.

The bandage was tight and enchanted to prevent her from undoing it, just to be safe, they did the same with the other wrist.

Perhaps they lectured her about her "self-destructive patterns" or something, but they definitely talked about having someone in her room monitoring her at all times.

They forced her to get up, just one day, and took her in front of the Speaker of God.

The entity touched her face with overly warm hands, looked into her eyes tenderly, and called her "My child."

Sera felt mocked.

If the Speaker of God was there before her, why hadn't she helped Emily survive?

She knew no one more worthy of that divine help.

She asked, but the answers were the usual high-sounding words about divine design.

She just wanted to burn that design like she had done with all of Emily's stuff.

She didn't know whether to call it a crisis of faith; after all, she wasn't questioning whether God was real; she had his Speaker right before her, but she was no longer sure she could trust his judgment.

She thought of it as more of a crisis of trust.

The speaker told her that only she could heal herself, and with that, she left.

They took her back to her freezing room.

Gabriel made her promise not to hurt herself again.

Raphael simply reminded her that she couldn't undo the bandages.

She ignored them both, and as soon as they left the room, she began scratching her stomach.

She dreamed often.

About her siblings, especially, sometimes they laughed at her, at the stupid, high seraphim who had been fooled for years.

More often, they simply stared at her, their eyes vacant, Lucifer with the same betrayed expression he'd had on the day of his fall, and Emily with the expression of absolute horror she'd had when she'd found out about the extermination.

At a certain point, someone brought the basket with the egg into her room.

At six years and ten months, it hatched.

Sera didn't watch the egg hatch; she didn't even notice it had opened until she heard a newborn baby's cry.

She didn't call Raphael, or anyone else.

For the first time, she got out of bed and took the little seraphim in her arms.

She was smaller than Emily had been when she first hatched, she had pale skin, like Lucifer's, and her wings were similar to his as well, white with red feathers, her eyes hadn't opened yet, but she already had a little white hairs on top of her small head.

Sera wrapped her in a blanket and put her back in her basket.

From then on, she began to care for the baby; she got up to rock her if she cried, she fed her, she kept her warm, but she still hadn't been able to give her a name.

Every time she looked at her, she couldn't see her as a sister, or as a person really; she was just another lamb to be sent to the slaughter.

She was also so white and delicate that soon that was the only way Sera could think of her, the little lamb.

She didn't talk to her, she didn't smile at her, she didn't play with her, but she cared for her.

The rest of the time, she slept and scratched herself.

For two whole years, that was the routine for the High seraphim.

And then her little lamb began to feel sick.

She cried incessantly, even though Sera fed her, rocked her, and let her sleep in bed with her.

Perhaps from crying so much, she began coughing constantly and shaking like a leaf.

Sera tried desperately to pretend she didn't care; she knew, she knew she would die like the others, it had just happened sooner than expected, and maybe it was for the best, at least she hadn't had time to really get to know her.

She forced herself not to call anyone.

And she knew it was a sin.

Because, of course, shedding innocent blood was a sin.

But she couldn't force herself to get up and go to the archangels to tell them that the little lamb was dying just like Emily had and just like Lucifer practically had.

She could already see herself kneeling before the council, her eyes filled with tears as she showed them a tiny corpse
"There, have you seen?! This is what I do! I kill poor souls without even having to lift a finger! I ruin everything and I don't know how to do anything else! Now find someone else to raise the next bringer of joy, I don't want to have anything else to do with this!"

She imagined herself alone, for the rest of her life; probably in her office, if they'd let her keep her position, though perhaps it would have been better to cast her down too.

Yes...falling seemed like a good enough punishment.

Perhaps down there her efforts wouldn't have been in vain and she would have died, suffocated by her own blood.

It was a comforting thought.

But then it was the little lamb that began coughing up blood.

She writhed like a fly in a spider's web, crying incessantly, and between the sobs, jets of gold came from her throat.

She was increasingly pale, almost more gray than white, rich blue eyes lifeless, as if she was already dead, her wings were shedding red feathers all over the bed.

She was already smaller than she should have been at birth, but slowly she seemed to be getting smaller and smaller.

She wasn't eating, and even though Sera knew it shouldn't matter, because seraphims didn't really need to eat, it seemed to, because with every meal she skipped, she seemed to disappear a little more.

She didn't know what to do.

She had to call someone, but it couldn't be the archangels.

And also she didn't have the strength.

She never had the strength to do anything.

And then one morning Sera woke up, the little lamb beside her, still, her eyes closed.

She wasn't crying, she wasn't wheezing, she wasn't moving at all.

Her little blanket completely covered in gold.

The high seraphim immediately shook her, hoping that what she feared hadn't actually happened.

She still didn't move.

She picked her up, shook her again, put her back in bed, waited…

Nothing.

She was a rag doll in the woman's hands.

She was dead.

Sera had killed her sister once more.

And for the first time in months, the emotions returned: anguish, anxiety, but above all, disgust for herself, for having screwed up yet again.

She had to fix this.

She stood up, her legs shaking from the inactivity.

She had to ask for help; she hated the idea, but there was no other way.

She walked blindly through the halls of the palace, the little lamb in her arms, and then an idea occurred to her.

She hadn't flown in a long, long time, and her wings were even more shaky than her legs as she took flight, but at least she managed to do it.

She rang the doorbell at Sir Pentious's house with such strength she almost broke it.

He came to open it immediately.

Their eyes met, and for a second they looked at each other, but before the snake could say anything, Sera pushed the little lamb into his arms.

"Is she dead?"
She asked frantically.

Pentious's eyes widened and he immediately placed two fingers against her neck, then exhaled a long breath
"No!"
He exclaimed, entering the house, immediately followed by Sera.
"But she's freezing..."

"Freezing?"

"Yes, where have you kept her until now?"

“In my room…”

Finally the man stopped, entering his lan and placing the little lamb on the desk, pushing aside a few pieces of scrap metal
“Okay, okay…that must have been it, then…baby birds need a lot of heat when they’re born…I’ll go get my heat lamp, you wrap her in a clean blanket, okay?”

The woman obeyed without saying anything.

She didn’t know what to say; the last time she’d seen Pentious, she’d rudely sent him away, yet now he hadn’t thought twice about helping her and her little lamb.

He deserved his place in Heaven far more than she did.

As she wrapped the little lamb in a blanket, Pentious returned
“Okay, now we’ll put her under the lamp, come into the living room.”

Again, she followed him without saying a word and watched him place the little lamb on the cushions with the same delicacy and precision he’d used when she’d been just an egg.

The seraphim's eyes shone as she looked at him; he was doing all this for her, despite everything.

Once they were settled, the two of them faced the couch and waited for what seemed like an eternity.

At a certain point, their hands intertwined, more by instinct than anything else.

Finally, the little lamb began to move; she wasn't awake yet, but she was alive.

Sera finally breathed again.

For a moment, she expected to feel all of her feelings being drained from her body again, but it didn't happen; she still felt anxious and deeply guilty
"I almost killed her..."
She said, more like a whisper than anything else.

Pentious didn't try to reassure her, but instead looked at her with a strangely sweet seriousness
"Nothing. The archangels didn't give me anything for being by your side, they just told me about a very sad woman who could really use a friend, it was just a bonus that she turned out to be the coolest woman I've ever known."

Sera smiled slightly
"You saved my little lamb's life..."

Pentious shrugged.
"She needed help..."

Without thinking, the woman hugged him tightly
"Thank you...thank you for saving both of our lives, thank you for being a true angel...far more deserving of the title than I am...and thank you for being the best friend I've ever had.”

They pulled away, and the man looked at her with the same stars she'd seen in his eyes that day, when he'd told her Cherri had gotten redeemed
"I want to kiss you so much right now, but your lips don't seem ready..."

The high seraphim laughed amusedly and leaned over to kiss the man herself.

His lips did in fact begin to bleed.

Pentious took a handkerchief from his pocket and dabbed them gently.

They spent the rest of the day cuddled next to the couch, making sure the little lamb was fully recovered.

It wasn't all sunshine and rainbows after that.

Sera actually started going to therapy; the advantage of finally having sinners in heaven was that almost all of them were still in the habit of working, unlike most winners.

She discovered she had more than one problem to solve, but she was working on it, and besides, she liked her therapist.

Husk was Pentious's friend, and although Sera had had her reservations at first, she had to admit that talking to him was strangely liberating, like seriously it was so refreshing to talk with a man who didn't talk to her like they got high on sugar before even waking up.

The rubber band was back on her wrist, Pentious always carried lip balm, and Raphael sometimes gave her enchanted bandages if things got too bad, but she was needing them less and less.

For now, she had stepped down from her post as high seraphim and was letting the archangels handle all the bureaucratic matters that would otherwise have fallen on her shoulders.

In general, she was trying to take things more slowly.

She hadn't killed her siblings.

She wasn't the cause of their unhappiness.

She hadn't ruined them.

The fate of the world didn't rest on her shoulders.

She tried to tell herself all that every day, and sometimes she even believed it, more often than not, as time went on.

She and Pentious had started something.

Sera still didn't know what to call it, but they were back spending a lot of time together, discussing inventions and philosophers and books and kissing; no secrets between them.

And they started living together.

They ended up naming the little lamb Jane, between laughs
"It has a beautiful meaning, doesn't it?"
Sera tried to justify herself, even though they both knew the biblical meaning had nothing to do with the choice.

The seraphim of joy was growing up well, even with two biblically unprepared parents, and she delighted in giving them as many heart attacks as possible, a true heir to her late sister; it's no coincidence that she learned to fly at just six years old, when most angels weren't even able to sit up properly.

But all in all, both Sera and Pentious were learning to be parents in the best possible way possible, and maybe, just maybe, they wouldn't have screwed up.

In short, the two had already managed to keep Jane alive for almost thirteen years; they could continue like this for a few hundred more, until she was self-sufficient.

There was a ball that evening.

Sera didn't want to go.

Not that day.

It was the cursed date again, the anniversary and the birthday; it's no coincidence that the party itself would technically be for that last event, Abel's idea.

But her therapist had told Sera it would do her good, and she couldn't deny that going out and having fun was probably a more dignified way to honor her sister's memory than staying home and feeling sorry for herself.

It was also very likely what Emily would have wanted.

So the woman was getting ready.

She had left the thankless task of dressing Jane to Pentious and was herself slipping into a dress that seemed ridiculous to her.

It was long and had at least four layers of tulle too many, the corset was too tight and had no sleeves, exposing her arms, full of scars and with the enchanted bandages on both wrists.

She had tried gloves but they itched, and they would have been very impractical if she had to take hold of Jane, in case she decided to fly around, so she had scrapped them.

She certainly could have found something better if she'd thought about it sooner, but honestly, she'd only been 100% convinced to go to the party that morning, and in the days leading up to it, not buying a dress had been a bit of a way of keeping a door open in case she ended duo not wanting to go.

And also...it had been a gift from Emily, and it seemed right to wear it for the occasion.

A little uncomfortable but determined, she zipped up her dress and they headed off to rescue Pentious.

The man was in the midst of a battle; he'd already been wearing a simple, formal black jacket, but he probably would have ended up changing it because, thanks to Jane, it was completely wrinkled; the little girl was only wearing half of the dress and didn't seem eager to get the other half on.

She kept kicking and writhing like a little worm.

“Hold her still, I beg you!”
Pentious exclaimed as soon as he heard Sera enter.

The woman immediately headed for the little seraphim, and in just half an hour they managed to force her into the dress.

Only then did Pentious look at Sera properly, his eyes wide with exhaustion
“I know we said we’d do her hair nicely for the occasion, but…oh, my…you’re…”

The woman looked at the ground, a little uncomfortable, but before her head could begin to spiral, Pentious took her hands
“You’re beautiful! You look like a pile of swans!”

The high seraph laughed, and the two kissed softly

“Come on!”
He said with determination once they had pulled away, handing her her lip balm.

The evening was…

Well, at first it was more than a little overstimulating; Sera greeted everyone she knew awkwardly, trying to stay close to Pentious as they both tried to make sure Jane didn't have the bright idea to start flying around the room.

Of course, it eventually happened, because the little girl was a seraphim of joy after all, and impulsiveness was apparently in their genes, but Pentious caught her almost immediately.

The lights were bright, the music loud, but Sera thought she was holding her own well enough, so much so that when Pentious saw Cherri and his other friends dancing in the middle of the room, she motioned for him to join them.

"Aren't you coming?"

“No, for goodness sake, the center of the dance floor isn't really my place…”

“Okay, I'll take Janey. I think Cherri and Angel could actually knock her out, they're quite the match.”

“I'd like to see them try, and hey, if they end up being able to, congratulate them for me and ask them if they'd agree to put her to bed every night. I'm willing to pay!”

The man gave her another kiss and left.

Sera watched the group dance for a few minutes, but soon felt uncomfortable standing still at the side of the room, so she began to pace aimlessly.

She ended up sitting on the stairs and took a deep breath.

She snapped the rubber band three times, one after the other.

She smiled slightly.

Sera hadn't been feeling well for a while.

Perhaps she'd never really felt well, not with all the expectations that had been heaped on her shoulders over the millennia.

But for the first time, she felt as if something was changing.

Perhaps for the first time, she would truly be okay.

Because for the first time in millennia, she was surrounded by love again, and she would make sure to let herself be truly loved.

Suddenly, she saw Jane flying undisturbed across the ceiling.

She couldn't help but laugh as the little girl landed on her with very little grace.

She hugged her tightly, kissing her white head.

"My precious little lamb! Come here."

Probably already exhausted from the music and dancing, the little girl fell asleep in her big sister's arms.

And Sera couldn't help but hold her tighter.

"Your older siblings would have loved you, little lamb...just like I do."

Pentious joined them, breathless, a few moments later, and upon seeing the scene, he smiled sweetly, sitting down next to the two and holding Sera tightly.

"Thank you for the second chance..."

"Thank you for being my second chance…”

Notes:

so, yeah, here's the second and last chapter!
Did you like it?
Do you have questions, compliments or complaints?
If you do I beg you to let me know in the comments cause each and every of them makes me the happiest gal in the galaxy
If you want to talk more my Tumblr is still Regina_del_trash, today I visited a German church so expect a drawing of Sera, Pentious and Jane in a German church in the next few days and maybe some headcanon for her because I love her and need to yap about her.
I'll see you all next fic, but till then
I hope you have the nicest day
An intergalactic kiss
Lapis★

Notes:

So, yeah! I've been thinking about writing something for this ship for a long while, and finally I caved in.
Do you have any questions? Compliments of complaints?
Please let me know all of that down in the comments, I love comments, every single one of them makes me the happiest gal in the galaxy.
If you want to chat there's also my Tumblr Regina_del_trash
Also hope it isn't too noticeable that I've been reading My Brilliant friend, cause at one point I was fearing that my writing style got a bit too inspired by it, but well...worst books to be influenced by.
I'll see you all next Sunday for the next chapter.
In the meantime
Hope you have the nicest day
An intergalactic kiss
Lapis★