Chapter Text
Knock knock
En groaned, pulling the blanket up to his nose.
Knock knock
He shielded his eyes from the sun spilling through the window, too bright. Too tired. He needs more sleep.
Knock knock knock
En whines as he turns over. This was getting quite annoying now. He checks his phone. Who the heck was knocking as early as... 10 am. Well, for En, it was early.
He sighs and rolls onto his back as he stares at a notification from half an hour ago. 'I hope you didn't forget about our one-month anniversary. Be ready before I arrive.' From Akoya. Eh...Anniversary? Oh yeah, because a month ago he pulled that bitch by being autistic or however that saying goes.
Wait. Shoot. He just woke up, and now Akoya's here. What was that about being ready before that happened... Well, he could try to wear something presentable, but ..yeah. Nevermind. That's not happening.
He feels horrible, tired in every sense of the word. There isn't an ounce of motivation in the entire six feet of his body. He wants to try for Akoya, but he just can't.
His bedroom door opens, and En pulls the covers over his head, hiding himself. His dad must've let Akoya in the house. He doesn't want to be scalded when he's just woken up. He holds his shark plushie close to his chest and hopes Akoya is in a nice mood today.
"En?" Akoya's voice rings out. Oh, right, he stopped calling En Yufuin-san the moment they became a thing. There was a sentence or maybe a few after that, but they went right through one ear and out the other.
"Were you even listening to me, I-" The annoyance in Akoya's tone made En curl up more. He dreads the next sentence, knowing Akoya, there's going to be a lecture, but it never comes. Instead, there's a little pat on his head before footsteps leave the room. Huh.
This somehow makes En feel guiltier.
But the guilt is short-lived. Akoya comes back into the room, and the mattress dips, but it's too little to be a human. En pulls the covers from his head and is greeted with a meowing ball of fluff right in his face. His kitten, Manju, of course he named her that.
Manju starts purring upon seeing En's face and tries to headbutt her way under the covers. He smiles subtly, reaching out a hand to stroke her velvet-soft fur. He felt better now, good enough to sit up.
That's when he spots Akoya. "When your cat learns to climb the stairs, you'll wake up earlier. Now get ready; can't be late"
En groans. Living is hard. He gets up anyway, carrying Manju with him- as if she'd help him pick out suitable clothes. Just a simple shirt and trousers, that's all he needs- yet the guilt is creeping back, he's not putting in any effort again.
He feels like this whenever Akoya's around.. like he's not doing enough. Like he wants to change, but he just can't. Akoya is perfect, beautiful- and he's supposed to hate vulgar commoners like En, so why doesn't he anymore. Why would he willingly date someone like him? Why are they together? He doesn't get it.
Manju jumps out of En's arms, a little distressed by being excessively stroked. En frowns, grabs whatever he sees first and goes to the bathroom to get dressed. He doesn't know why he didn't ask Akoya to leave whilst he gets dressed, it's his room in the first place. Man... today is not a good day.
En changes his trousers and underwear first, finding it easier to get the harder part out of the way faster. But maybe it was a mistake because now he's standing shirtless in front of the bathroom mirror and just... staring.
His dead fish eyes stare right back at him, emotionless, hollow. Eyes are supposed to be the window to the soul, the things that show emotion. But En feels a lot. More than others think. Ha. His eyes are probably a part of that.
He sees the maturity in his face.. goddamnit now is not the time to be stressing over how old he looks, but it happens anyway. He doesn't really see any beauty there, not the freckles, not the handsomely downturned nose or the dark blonde locks. Just old.
Yeah. Really not a good day.
En frowns and puts his shirt on, covering up the freckles that are sprinkled all over his shoulders and arms and his happy trail. He also makes a lazy attempt to comb through his hair with his hands, but he's still not used to doing that by himself.
At least he's not completely alone, but his time with Akoya is limited. His boyfriend is still in school; as a third year now, so he's busy for a lot of the time. So the only times he'll see Akoya are probably on weekends, or during holidays- but the other will have plans during then, so just weekends it is.
En will be alone during the holidays.
The realisation leaves a gaping wound inside his stomach.
The holidays are soon
He has to spend most of the time as possible with Akoya