Work Text:
Kaylee “KJ” Johnson had just been handed the opportunity to do the funniest thing in Formula 1 history.
She was eighteen years old, recently hired, and very much meant to be invisible to the public for at least another year. Instead, she was staring at her phone in the MCT, watching one notification after another roll in.
"BWT Alpine F1 Team announces Kaylee Johnson as Pierre Gasly’s Race Engineer for the 2025 season."
Former Alpine junior engineer.
Current McLaren engineer.
Oscar Piastri’s race engineer — signed, done. Not announced yet.
KJ stopped laughing.
“…That’s not right.”
She opened Slack and quickly added five people into a chat.
Zak Brown, Andrea Stella, Oscar Piastri, Sophia Oog, Tom Stallard
> KJ: hi sorry quick question
> KJ: hypothetically how illegal is it for alpine to announce me like this
> Zak: hypothetically or currently
> Andrea: this seems like an alpine problem
> Oscar: oh my god
> KJ: They announced me as pierre’s engineer for 2025
> Tom: no they did not
> KJ: they did
She dropped the screenshot.
> Zak: i need a coffee
There was a long pause.
> Andrea: this is… familiar
> Oscar:😐
> Zak: do not do what i think you’re about to do
> KJ: i was thinking of making a statement... also Tom we've announced you've retired right?
> Tom: yes?
> Sophie: what kind of statement
KJ typed carefully
> KJ: like. exactly the same one Oscar made
> Zak: absolutely not
> Sophie: …how exact
> KJ: word for word
> Oscar: 😭
Another pause.
>Oscar: that would be objectively hilarious
>Zak: i will pretend i did not hear this
>Andrea: if you do this, we must be ready
>KJ: mclaren social?
>Zak: @sophie
>Sophie: fine. three seconds after.
>Tom: I'm going to miss this team- best of luck Kaylee
That was permission enough.
KJ opened Twitter.
She copied the tweet.
She posted.
—-
I understand that, without my agreement, Alpine F1 have put out a press release late this afternoon that I am engineering for them next year.
This is wrong and I have not signed a contract with Alpine for 2025. I will not be engineering for Alpine next year.
---
Three seconds later.
McLaren Racing confirms Kaylee “KJ” Johnson as Oscar Piastri’s Race Engineer for the 2025 Formula 1 season.
The internet didn’t hesitate.
It imploded
---
Sky Sports cut in live.
> “We are seeing a remarkable repeat of history—this tweet mirrors Oscar Piastri’s 2023 statement almost exactly.”
Ted Kravitz, barely hiding a smile: “Alpine have once again announced someone who did not agree to be announced.”
Headlines followed instantly.
Motorsport.com:
'Engineer echoes Piastri tweet as Alpine repeat contract blunder'
The Athletic:
‘I will not be engineering for Alpine’: F1 déjà vu'
BBC Sport:
'McLaren teenager goes viral after Alpine error'
---
F1 Twitter lost its mind.
> “SHE COPIED IT WORD FOR WORD 😭”
> “ENGINEER SILLY SEASON >>> DRIVER SILLY SEASON”
> “ALPINE HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE AGAIN”
> “OSCAR YOU STARTED A CURSE”
Side-by-side screenshots flooded timelines.
Same formatting.
Same calm devastation.
Same Alpine.
---
Lando saw it, gasped, and immediately walked over to Oscar.
“No way,” he said, phone already up. “You’re being referenced.”
Oscar read it once.
Then smiled.
“…She really did do the line breaks.”
Lando laughed. “That’s commitment.”
He retweeted it with:
> history really does repeat itself
McLaren liked it instantly.
---
KJ put her phone down, heart racing, knowing she’d just done something incredibly stupid, incredibly funny and permanently entered Formula 1 lore.
And Alpine?
Alpine found out like everyone else.
On Twitter.
Again.