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Language:
English
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Published:
2025-12-18
Updated:
2025-12-24
Words:
3,744
Chapters:
4/?
Comments:
11
Kudos:
14
Bookmarks:
2
Hits:
285

WHO TAUGHT DEMIGODS THE FUCK WORD? OR WIZARDS, ALCHEMISTS, PRINCESSES, AND EX-CONS FOR THAT MATTER?

Summary:

The one where Percy has connections.

Thalia: TreeTreeBitch
Grover: NOTASHEEP
Nico: death boi
Will: death boi's type
Jason: SKY
Piper: prettypretty
Leo: imwiththestapleseater
Hazel: Basically Rory
Frank: Basically Jess
Percy: NOT death boi's type
Annabeth: Wize
Ethan: NOT FAIR
Cassandra: SwordsSwordsAndMoreSwords
Rapunzel: WindInMyHair
Eugene: Gee-bug
Lance: swiper no swiping
Keira: cookies
Catalina: cream
Varian: stripes
Hugo: <3 stripes
Nuru: STARS
Yong: kablooey
Shel: Piper's Girlfriend
Draco: snarkeesweet
Harry: sweetsnarkee
Hermione: BooksLover
Ron: FoodLover
George: KitKat1
Fred: KitKat2
Apollo: SHIMMERANDSHINE
Lityerses: im with sparkles
Meg: IAMTHELORAXBITCHES
Neville: Food
Luke: goldenboi
Reyna: RARA

Edit: goddammit ive been calling ethan nathan and i'll change that now

Chapter Text

Percy Jackson has created a chat with 34 users

Percy Jackson has named the chat 'DONT SAY THE FUCK WORD KIDS'

Percy Jackson has changed 34 display names

snarkeesweet: tf is this

NOT death boi's type: was bored

NOT death boi's type: now im not

WindInMyHair: sworrrry whaayt is theis

WindInMyHair: hoew do i uewswe

stripes: Raps where r u

WindInMyHair: gnareden

stripes: be right there

NOT FAIR: hi guys havent seen yall in a while

Wize: And whom the fuck would you be?

NOT FAIR: ik u remember meeeeee

NOT death boi's type: I didnt add u

NOT FAIR: no the 4 of us hacked

NOT FAIR: into ur auto adds

NOT FAIR: and made ourselves autochange names too

NOT FAIR: @goldenboi@KitKat1, @SKY

goldenboi: mmyez?

NOT FAIR: should we

KitKat1: NO

SKY: nah im crashing camp 2mor 2c how theyll react

KitKat1: and im going to the dubs den.

goldenboi: im not going back

goldenboi: not after everything

NOT FAIR: i might not either

death boi's type: wdym

snarkeesweet: also who tf is even here

NOT death boi's type: we got demigods, wizards, a god, some (mad) scientists/alchemists, two princesses, and two ex-cons.

NOT death boi's type has posted a screenshot of the key of usernames (see summary) not including NOT FAIR, KitKat1, goldenboi, or SKY

NOT death boi's type: and those odd 4

imwiththestapleseater: jay wouldve been sky

imwiththestapleseater: i miss him


Private chat between NOT FAIR, KitKat1, goldenboi, and SKY

SKY: i gotta

SKY: i feel so bad

KitKat1: just lemme get my bros in there

goldenboi: should i

goldenboi: or will they hate me

goldenboi: i did go to punishment after all

NOT FAIR: it sucked ass there

goldenboi: IKR


DONT SAY THE FUCK WORD KIDS

KitKat1: @KitKat2@FoodLover

SKY: @imwiththestapleseater @prettypretty @TreeTreeBitch @NOT death boi's type @Wize @Basically Rory @Basically Jess @death boi

KitKat1: We have an announcement

SKY: also we're in an undisclosed locale for safety

KitKat1: anyways hi again fellow weaslys

KitKat2: i think its weaslies g

KitKat1: f! i missed u so much i am so sorry

KitKat2: dont be ur back and now 

KitKat1: were saints again

KirKat2: because

KitKat1: were

KitKat2: holy

FoodLover: hdciiiiiiiiiiiqerwy7ohecasUQG

SKY: and

SKY: um

SKY has posted a selfie of a blond boy with a scar on his lip

imwiththestapleseater: no

imwiththestapleseater: not funny

imwiththestapleseater: jason died

imwiththestapleseater: JASON DIED

imwiththestapleseater: JASON DIED A YEAR AGO

death boi: its true

death boi: he did

death boi: but he came back

death boi: just to be killed again by me

TreeTreeBitch: Oh no

TreeTreeBitch: leos was awful enough and that was like six days

TreeTreeBitch: and i didnt even kno him very well

TreeTreeBitch: but my brother

TreeTreeBitch: who was dead a year

TreeTreeBitch: who we burned the corpse of

SHIMMERANDSHINE: DON'T.

SHIMMERANDSHINE: HE WAS MY BROTHER TOO.

SHIMMERANDSHINE: HE DIED IN FRONT OF ME AS I WATCHED HELPLESSLY.

SHIMMERANDSHINE: FUCK HE DIED FOR ME.

SHIMMERANDSHINE: I DROVE HIS FUCKING HEARSE.

SHIMMERANDSHINE: I GOT ZOMBIFIED PROTECTING THAT FUCKING COFFIN.

SHIMMERANDSHINE: I CANBSGVYWECECSA

IAMTHELORAXBITCHES: Lestey is out of commission.

IAMTHELORAXBITCHES: Lit helping.

IAMTHELORAXBITCHES: but yeah watching it was pretty fucking awful.

prettypretty: LIKE HELL IT WAS YOU CANT JUST COME BACK FROM A SPEAR BEIN

Piper's Girlfriend: im coming now

Piper's Girlfriend: dont do anything i wouldnt

death boi: fucking bitch

death boi: remember in dalmatia when i sed dont ever grab me ever again

SKY: yeah. i can leave

death boi: NO.

death boi: FUCK WHAT I SAID IN DALMATIA, GIVE ME A FUCKING HUG.

death boi's type: neeks istgs u shadowed didnt u

SKY: he did

death boi's type: 

death boi's type: good.

death boi's type: did u kno u were the 1st he was ever out to?

SKY: no

death boi's type: your reaction gave him the courage to come out to others and eventually me. 

death boi's type: he was devastated when u died.

death boi's type: u better hug him for 1m years to make up for it.

SKY: gladly

SKY: atl he's giving me a chance

death boi's type: i am too

death boi's type:  ftr

SKY: :D

Wize: wabt the other 2

goldenboi: hey annie

Wize: fuuuuuck

Wize: luke?

goldenboi: and Nakmura

Wize: i missed u

Wize: we all did

Wize: noone else will say so but we all did

goldenboi: 

Wize: ethan 2

Wize: all the demigods that died on either side got a funeral. 

goldenboi:

Wize: I forgive you.

goldenboi: thank you

Wize: both of you.

Wize: all or you.

NOT FAIR: thank you.

goldenboi: not ready 4 camp tho

Wize: fair

Wize: just checking but

Wize: kronos is gone

Wize: right?

goldenboi: Absolutely

NOT FAIR: trust jas, he said so.

Wize: good. I missed you.

Wize: get over here and hug me.