Chapter Text
Godric's Hollow, early August, 1899
Perhaps it was the heat that rose to his head as he sat on the rickety chair at the desk, for this came like a bolt from the blue and he could have slapped himself in the face for not having thought of the possibility before. Resolutely he slammed the poor book he had been skimming through shut.
"GELLERT!"
The name of his favorite person came out a little too loudly, but he was far too excited by the thought to care. Gellert was lying on his bed and when his head snapped up at his sudden outburst it was with such force that the notes strewn across the bed whirled around. Instantly the boy was at his side, kneeling before him with his hands on his shoulders.
The look that sought his was a mixture of worry, excitement and uncertainty.
"What?! What have you found?!"
Albus blinked twice before regaining focus and looking straight into Gellert's enchanting eyes.
"Oh.. no, nothing to do with Hallows, but- hey, listen to me!"
The boy had stood up at this, ran a hand over his face and backed away towards the window, not letting him out of focus. Gellert was looking at Albus so intently that he felt the blush appear, as unwelcome as ever, and damned he couldn't look away. He was firmly, willingly caught up in the boy's charisma.
"Well, tell me what made it worth giving me a heart attack? I'm listening, liebling."
Hearing the affectionate nickname did absolutely nothing positive for his ability to formulate a response, which Gellert clearly showed he knew by smiling that.. awfully, awfully beautiful and cunningly at him.
Albus cleared his throat a little in embarrassment.
“Well.. I got to thinking about these two-way mirrors, you know? They’re quite rare, hard to come by, and the ones that are found are more expensive than any other object. You can make your own, although it would take an absurd amount of time and research into extremely complex spells, but then I thought, we’re pretty smart.. so it shouldn’t really require that much of our brainpower. What do you think?”
Gellert raised an eyebrow at him, his smile widening a little.
“And why would we need one, do you think?”
Albus put a hand around his neck and looked away.
"I don't want to take this, us, or you... for granted. I don't want to assume that we will always be by each other's side, I don't dare to believe that life will play so easily with us. The fact that you were even put in my path I just see as a test of fate. Sometimes I don't dare to believe that you are real, Gellert. This feels too good to be true, and when something seems that way... it usually is."
He took a deep breath and turned his gaze back to his love, who stood still and listened intently.
“I can’t believe how lucky I am that you came into my life and I’m terrified of waking up every morning and finding out it was just a dream. I know we have a blood pact, but..”
As soon as he saw the boy push himself away from the windowsill, he turned his head away again. Showing himself so vulnerable was not something he liked to do. It wasn’t long before he felt slender, familiar fingers wrap around his hands before a pair of other fingers gently gripped his chin to turn his head back.
Albus met Gellert's gaze warily, unsure of what he would find there. Those mismatched, mesmerizing eyes showed nothing but affection and understanding. He watched as the boy pulled their eternal vow from where it was hidden under his shirt and tenderly caressed the silvery metal.
"Yes, you know we have this. You also know, as well as I do, that this only prevents us from ever going against each other. It's no guarantee that we'll always be side by side, only that neither of us can attack the other without devastating consequences.
With a two-way mirror, however, we'll always be able to communicate, no matter if we're in different corners of this round planet. And that's why you want us to create our own. It's just another... I wouldn't call it a precaution, but an assurance that if something tears us apart, we'll still be available to each other. In more ways than one."
Albus could do nothing but stare at Gellert. It was as if the other had peered into his head and seen the exact words he had been unable to come up with just a minute earlier. This was further proof that the two of them were equals; their minds were always on the same wavelength and nothing was ever too complicated, too hard to follow. Nothing needed to be broken down into simplified components to be understood.
He felt a relieved smile take form on his lips and lowered his hand to cup Gellert's cheek. His partner closed his eyes and leaned into the touch before turning his head and kissing Albus' palm.
"I agree with you. Of course I do, you know that. No spells are too complicated for our big brains. Come on, let's get started!"
Without further ado, Gellert grabbed his hand, pulled him up, and dragged a laughing Albus out of the house with him.
-
Hogwarts, Great Britain, mid-November, 1932
It was with a sad smile that he stood with one half of the mirror in his hand, running his thumb carefully over the glass when he came back to the present. They had not created a large thing, but it was a "convenient travel-sized rarity", as Gellert had called it, and could easily fit in his coat pocket without having to be magically reduced.
Albus had not used the mirror since they had parted ways, just two weeks after it was finished, although he made sure to always have it close at hand. Not necessarily on him, but close. He could not bear to part with it, not after all the time and energy they had put into creating something that was actually quite complicated, even for magical and skilled people like him and Gellert.
One time his half had dimmed again before a line of text appeared.
"Albus... are you there?" it read.
They had designed the object so that the mist would disappear when the recipient began a response. If it didn't, the mist would simply remain until the sender wiped it off their part of the mirror, and thus it would also disappear from the recipient's mirror.
Albus had just stared at the four words for hours, unable to think, unable to feel anything but overwhelming guilt, sadness, and loss. He had sat on the floor, letting his tears flow in silence until he saw the mist disappear. Gellert had wiped it off his part, and right then and there it felt like an infinite betrayal on Albus' part. After all, he was the one who had suggested this idea, he was the one who had expressed concern that they would not be available to each other.
Yet he was the one who refused to answer.
He still felt it.
Guilt, sadness and loss were never far away, always easy to fall into when his thoughts became too intense, for the moment, to be controlled. He had long since come to terms with the fact that this was how his life would be from now on. Loneliness, constant anxiety. One side of the bed, his side, remained cold and empty. So did his heart; cold, locked. Reserved for one person only. The only person who had ever come close enough to know the real version of him, the only person who saw him.
Albus had wanted to try to contact Gellert. Of course he had, more times than he was willing to admit. But he couldn't. The Ministry was following his every move like desperate hawks looking for weak prey to sink their claws into. The slightest slip and he would be arrested, accused of whatever they could think of and try to stage their arguments as valid.
A thought struck him, taking a slightly different form than before. The difference now, compared to then, was that Gellert was free. He had been acquitted of all crimes, so technically it wouldn't be considered treason of any kind if he... just... happened to write something. Something small. It couldn't hurt, could it?
He wouldn't do anything illegal and he was quite sure that there would be no response anyway. Gellert's ego was too big for the man to try to communicate again himself and he could certainly be petty enough to ignore Albus out of sheer spite.
Do what is right, not what is easy..
He had lived by that phrase for so many years, chanted it like a mantra in the blind belief that that was how it had to be. He had let it guide almost all of his choices, had instilled it in his students' minds and convinced every single person that it was worth it in the end.
To hell with looking out for everyone else's needs.
Albus took a deep breath, then three. Steeling himself for what he was about to do and what the outcome would surely be.
He sat down in the armchair in front of the freshly lit fire in his library, lifted the mirror, and began to write.
In all honesty, he didn't actually write anything. He just... put his finger to the glass, watched the surface fog up, and moved his finger again. Repeated this pattern probably fifteen times at different intervals, and was absolutely certain that the man over there in his enormous castle on the mainland was laughing at his damned insecurity.
Assuming he saw this fussing. If he even had his mirror left..
Albus hadn't even considered the possibility that Gellert might not have kept his share after their drastic breakup. He froze at the thought with his finger still on the glass, seemingly unable to think clearly. What if the man had actually gotten rid of it?
Then he could still sit here and fuss back and forth for an eternity without it making any difference. No, he was sure that Gellert still had his piece of the mirror.
Despite all his earlier statements in his youth that he certainly wasn't sentimental in any way, Albus just knew that it was with him. So he decided to try to reach out.
“Gellert.. are you there?”
What bittersweet irony, to use the same wording he had learned so long ago.
Nervousness took over. What if Gellert saw this and became insanely irritated? Given the man's hot-tempered mood, it was an extremely likely scenario. What if he read and chose to ignore Albus, just as he himself had been ignored? Or, what if a response appeared?
Would it be imbued with anger? Would it be hateful? Or, most likely, completely cold and indifferent? As the man himself had appeared to be in recent years.
He stared at the mirror in determined silence, trying to force an answer from the man in Austria who was surely refusing to answer just because he could. The first hour passed rather quickly.
Then time began to pass slowly, as it always does when one is eagerly waiting for something.. or someone.
Just as he was about to give up, about to wipe the mirror clean and accept that it was his turn to be rejected, a new frost began to form. Albus's eyes widened in shock. He clasped his hands together, put his fingertips to his lips, and held his breath. Merlin, his heart was pounding like crazy.
"Albus."
That was all. His name. Short and simple, just like that. He let out a breath, feeling thirty-three years of tension resting on his shoulders ease its pressure.
"It took time." Who was he to point that out, anyway?
"Is it really the right thing to come from you, do you think? Thirty-three years, Albus. Four hours is nothing by comparison."
Guilt washed over him as he read Gellert's answer. Of course he was right, they both knew that. But it didn't make it any easier. He decided to let it be, well aware that the man also knew he had a nail in his heart.
"Do you still drink tea?"
A simple question, as neutral to outsiders as if they had been talking about the weather. The answer came shortly after and Albus could easily see Gellert raise an eyebrow at this.
"Yes, do you?"
"I'm British, the blood in my veins has been replaced by tea. Be nice to Fawkes."
With that, he swept his hand over the glass, stood up, and left the mirror on the table. A low whistle later, Fawkes was perched on his shoulder, nuzzling his head against Albus' cheek. The man stroked the phoenix's feathers before attaching a small, cream-colored envelope to the bird's leg.
"Hurry up to him, okay?"
Fawkes let out a joyful howl, undeniably pleased at the opportunity to meet his former owner, and disappeared into his fire.
After sending his bird away, Albus turned to leave the library and head for the great kitchens of Hogwarts. A steaming cup of lemon tea had never hurt, even in the middle of the night.
Of course, he could have easily snapped his fingers in his chambers and seen the potion appear before him, but... he had never been one to turn down a walk. Alone or with others made no difference, although he preferred his own company.
It gave him time to consider his choice, time to foresee the consequences of this action regardless of the outcome. Being able to see the future without being a seer was an achievement.
Besides, there was something strangely soothing about making tea without magic. Perhaps because he had acquired the habit even before his teenage years. Perhaps because he had carried that particular habit with him throughout his life and had never let the skeptical looks and opinions of others influence him.
Once Albus had his tea in hand, he leaned against the stove and carefully sipped the hot liquid. Would Fawkes return tonight? He was the fastest winged creature in their magical world, although... the bird was just as attached to Gellert as Albus was.
A quiet scraping against one of the kitchen windows drew his attention back. Sure enough, his feathered friend was flapping outside, waiting.
Once back on his arm, Fawkes nuzzled his head against Albus's cheek and cooed contentedly. The man turned his face toward the bird's feathers and chuckled, before his breath caught in his throat as a faint scent of lavender and bergamot reached his senses.
“Well, he cuddled with you, hm?”
Hesitantly, he glanced down at the birds leg and felt his heart jump in his throat when he saw that there was an answer to his little inquiry, phrased as an established fact.
With trembling fingers, he opened Gellert’s envelope and saw his own words written in the man’s elegant, slightly cursive handwriting. A confirmation to be taken seriously.
-
Hotel Salzburger Hof, Salzburg Austria, mid-December, 1932
He had arrived at the hotel the night before.
It wouldn't take long to get from Britain to Austria in the morning, but it wouldn't hurt to get to their chosen meeting place in peace and quiet.
Albus had been wandering aimlessly around his small rented room, visibly nervous about tomorrow. He hadn't interacted with Gellert in years and found himself just as... excited now, as he had been every morning since their first meeting. The thought of being near him again made it hard to breathe.
This was nothing special, nothing to get excited about. It was just a meeting between two old friends. A meeting where two old friends were giving themselves a chance to catch up on lost time with each other, taking the time to sit down for a cup of tea and have a casual conversation, and absolutely nothing else. It wasn't a date.
So why couldn't he stop pacing? Why couldn't his pulse slow down?
Why was he getting so impatient with the fact that time was passing so damn slowly?
It was Gellert, after all.
No reason for all this nervousness and worry. The man wouldn't attack him, neither in a café in broad daylight nor hidden in the darkness of night in a slimy alley somewhere in a remote corner of the world.
Gellert, who was the only one who understood him. The only one he could never erase.
Gellert, who was the only man he would ever love.
When morning came, he hadn't been ready for anything. Not to open his eyes after the embarrassingly little sleep he'd managed to get, not to get up and choose a suit. Even trying to eat breakfast was out of the question; his stomach felt like it was about to twist into a knot.
He was definitely not ready to meet the person who was causing him all these annoying butterflies.
With a quick flick of his wrist, he summoned the two different suits he'd packed. Neither of them felt right, neither felt appropriate for the situation.
What would you wear when you met your true love after thirty years?
Albus sighed loudly to himself, ran a frustrated hand over his face and up through his hair before choosing his favorite; a three-piece gray suit; charcoal gray jacket and trousers, with the waistcoat matching the smoke gray. To this he put on a midnight blue tie that automatically emphasized the luster of his eyes.
Perhaps he was a little interested in seeing if he could still elicit a reaction from Gellert. But this was not a date.
A quick glance at the clock above the door frame showed that it was time to leave. Taking a walk sounded like a perfectly appealing idea, despite the dry chill in the air outside. Albus summoned his coat, hat, and gloves before finally pulling his burgundy scarf around his neck. A deep breath later, he was on his way out of the hotel and towards the café they were to meet at.
This is definitely not a date.
-
Café Tomaselli, Salzburg Austria, mid-December, 1932
The atmosphere in the café gave a soft, cozy feeling to the mind, like a warming blanket after a chilly autumn evening. Albus was struck by the familiar feeling as soon as he entered the door.
He stood still for a moment, looking at the interior, which was in warm brown and cream, with squiggly gold details on the walls, which only appeared from a certain angle in the light from the lamps. He smiled to himself before letting his gaze slide around the tables, inspecting the few people who were already here - and was about to stumble backwards when his eyes landed on a pair of mismatched, stunningly beautiful looking back at him from a slightly more secluded spot, further back. Merlin help, Gellert had aged like fine wine.
Albus felt the blush creeping up and cursed his bad luck that the man over there in the corner would definitely notice it, even at this distance. He walked slowly towards the chosen small booth and chose to try in vain to ignore the knowing smile that was sent his way when he arrived and sat down.
After making himself comfortable, hat and gloves beside him on the soft little sofa, he tilted his head a little to the left and saw Gellert do the same, to the right. Whether it was conscious or a subconscious adjustment based on his own body language, he didn't know. Either way, it was captivating.
The fact that the man's cheeks were beginning to resemble his own only reinforced that impression.
"You chose a place far away from the modern city."
This made him laugh softly.
"Yes, it was conscious. I thought that a little privacy from the crowds might... make this a little easier." It definitely didn't sound like he had planned anything..
“What are you implying, Professor Dumbledore? Are you saying you wanted me alone, out of the spotlight?”
That was such a Gellert-esque comment that Albus immediately relaxed and picked up on the game.
“Oh, if you only knew the plans I’ve been making in the hopes of having you all to myself.”
He waved his hand lightly in the air, as if this was a given. Oh my God, was he really trying to rouse his eternal flame?
“Well, now you have me alone. What’s your master plan?”
Albus understood the meaning of the question and put his hands up in the universal gesture of surrender.
"You caught me. I have absolutely no master plan in mind, I just.. I just wanted to see you. And without all the surveillance, now that you're finally a free man, I thought it would be easier, you know, to just.." Help, what was this babbling nonsense?
He sighed and ran one hand up his hair and ruffled it, all the while turning his gaze out the window to his left with no chance of stopping the embarrassment from eating him alive.
"You might want to fan yourself with this?"
Out of the corner of his eye, Albus saw Gellert hand him a small menu. He glared at the man and snatched the laminated paper away, which earned him a small laugh in response.
"Well, let's not be like that. It's a bit charming, this reaction of yours. You Brits have a knack for lour irresistibly."
"Just like you Germans have a special ability to twist our English words into something difficult to understand, unless you have experience interpreting your accents."
He immediately looked down at the menu and bit his lip after his statement, very aware that the other person would take offense.
"Austrian."
As expected, the answer came tinged with irritation. He looked up from the menu to meet Gellert's burning gaze and smiled warmly at him.
"Same sensitive subject, I hear. Isn't this your favorite? Which one would you recommend?"
Albus pointed at the menu and noted that it took the man across from him a second to register what he had said, which gave the impression that he wasn't the only one still affected by.. them.
When Gellert read the pointed text, it was with his own finger placed close to Albus's. He could immediately feel the static electricity in the air as his heart suddenly jumped in his chest.
If he reacted like this to just one finger..
"Apple strudel, yes. You remember that, right? I'm pretty sure you'd like that one."
Their fingers brushed as Gellert moved his to point to a line that read 'Sachertorte.' The small caress caused an enormous shiver of pleasure to rush through his entire body.
"What.. what kind of, um, flavor combination is that?" How would this end?
Gellert smiled at him and moved his finger back, letting it slide deliberately up and down his own.
"It's a luscious chocolate cake, with a layer of apricot jam, topped with chocolate icing."
"That sounds.. heavenly."
It was only when Albus saw the starry patterns in Gellert's captivating eyes that he realized that they had both leaned over the table and ended up dangerously close to each other.
Dangerous, as in the sense that it would be enough to stretch his neck a little to be able to reach the man's lips with his own. Dangerous, as in the sense that it would take minimal effort to tangle his fingers in that soft, fine hair at the same time and pull him closer, breathe into each other, let the other's hot breath fill his own lungs.
Dangerous, as in never feeling so safe anywhere else than in the strong embrace that was finally within his reach.
Albus bit his lower lip as he saw the man's pupils dilate, how he moistened his lips and felt their fingers link together. It wouldn't take much now.
His heart pounded like never before. Albus was sure that Gellert could hear it, could read his thoughts, could feel the magic crackling in the air between them.
Just a little centimeter left..
Just as he felt the man's lips ghost over his, something clanged loudly in the kitchen behind the counter of the café. Both men flinched and straightened up immediately. The spell was broken.
Albus noticed that his first instinctive reaction was not to look around nervously. Instead, he simply sat down more comfortably and looked at Gellert, no longer trying to hide all his emotions but letting them flow freely for the man to discover. That he was noticed was confirmed by the way the man's gaze deepened into his own and everything Albus felt for said man was reflected in the tender smile that took shape in the appealing, loving face opposite him.
He snuck his leg close to Gellert's under the table and saw the other's eyebrows shoot up. He just kept smiling back.
"I don't know about you, but I don't really feel hungry anymore."
"Wouldn't it be rude if we left without ordering?"
“Much less rude to leave without ordering something we won't eat anyway.”
Was that an indication or insinuation? Regardless..
Albus stood up, gathered his belongings, and looked questioningly at Gellert.
"Good point. So, are you coming?"
The man stood up and led the way through the room. Without further ado, Gellert opened the door, stopped, and waited for him to go out first. So incredibly chivalrous.
With a downcast look on his face and the blush returning, Albus walked out and continued for a bit before stopping and waiting for his companion to catch up.
Gellert was close enough for him to feel his breath on his neck. A strong shiver ran through his body, making his entire insides vibrate with something he thought he had forgotten.
"Where are we going now?"
The sentence was almost whispered in his ear and Albus closed his eyes to gather his thoughts. Merlin's beard, that man made it impossible to think clearly.
"You know the area better than I do. After all, we are in your territory now."
The voice did not sound nearly as calm and collected as he had imagined.
Gellert closed up next to him with a sly smile on his face, clearly aware of the inner chaos he had caused. Damned, horrible, wonderful man.
They walked for a while in comfortable silence. Albus looked around and noticed that every house, every building they passed had a picturesque aura, as if they had been painted on site straight from a storybook. It was calm and still outside, with a thin layer of snow that sparkled beautifully everywhere he turned his gaze.
Without stopping or saying anything, he gently intertwined his fingers with Gellert's. The man, however, stopped, mid-step, and looked first at their hands, then at Albus with a questioning look.
"I'm a little too old to actually care what other people think."
He said it nonchalantly and waved his free hand in the air slightly dismissively. His heart punded strongly again, uncertain of how his love would react.
"Albus.. if we make this public, if we make ourselves public, without 'going public' so to speak, it will change everything for you. You who are used to living a secluded life, out of the spotlight, will experience life the other way around. You will have the whole world's eyes on you, all the time. People will judge you harshly, make bizarre and absurd assumptions, throw out cheeky comments.."
Albus watched Gellert in silence as he spoke. He looked genuinely worried as his eyes ran over his face, searching without a doubt for the slightest sign of doubt. There would be none to be found.
There was no doubt within him.
He had never been more certain of anything in his life than he was of this very man who was right now standing silently waiting for his reaction, waiting for an answer.
After thinking through Gellert's reaction, he formulated a simple question.
"Wouldn't you be subjected to the same treatment, you mean?"
The incredulous look he got back was almost enough to make him understand what was coming next.
"Of course I would. And which of us has always been more inclined to take on what others think and feel? Which of us has always been the more... um, sensitive?"
Albus chuckled at that. He knew the man was right. During their summer, he had always been the one who had been careful, careful never to let anyone have the slightest suspicion of his true nature.
He had always made sure that they kept a respectful distance from each other when they were out, only he thought before he opened his mouth.
"I know... I know. Like I said, I'm too old to let myself be influenced by others.
If you have become insecure, if you don't want to... well, that's okay."
He shrugged one shoulder slightly and saw how Gellert's eyes changed from skepticism to almost offended before he continued.
“We can resume the secretiveness of youth. It was always a bit exciting, wasn’t it?”
Albus began to release the hand that fit so perfectly in his and felt the cold creep into the small space that had formed between their fingers.
Gellert didn’t let their hands slip apart, but took a firmer grip on his fingers as he stepped closer to Albus and began to speak.
“To hell with that. Nothing would make me prouder than to be seen by your side like this. You are mine, you have always been only mine and I want the whole world to know it.”
He said it so intensely, with a determination burning in his eyes, that Albus could do nothing but quickly look away before looking back into the warm, beautiful eyes he loved so much.
“Your self-imposed prison will no longer serve as a protection. Are you really sure you want to do this?”
The glow that shimmered in Gellert's eyes burned through his skin to settle in his veins, taking over his blood and now being responsible for his continued existence.
"I need no protection as long as I have you, my love."
Albus tenderly placed his free hand on the man's cheek and smiled as he watched his soulmate close his eyes and lean into the touch with a soft sigh. He felt a warm hand around his neck and instinctively tilted his head up, closing his eyes in anticipation. Finally, after so many years.
Gently he pressed his lips to his love's and marveled at whatever force was holding him upright. It was new, it was familiar. It was so right.
Albus couldn't stop the little moan from leaving his lips as they suddenly went cold from the lack of contact. It gave him a warm, loving look from Gellert and instantly he felt as if the world was back on track.
No matter what it took, he would never leave this man's side.
"You know, it was a shame to miss out on that cake... it sounded incredibly tempting."
Not fucking around a bit was something he would never enjoy. It wouldn't be them if that piece disappeared.
“Oh, I can probably think of something more tempting to give you.”
Gellert's suggestive gaze and knowing smile caused Albus's entire being to ignite. He lightly nudged the man in the chest with the hand that had previously been on his cheek.
“Oh, you horrible, horrible man.. so you talk.”
His partner burst out laughing. The deep sound made him melt and he felt a broad smile form on his face.
“Are you going to say you're too old for that too?”
Merlin should give him strength, how else would he put up with this eternal teasing?
“GELLERT! I didn't say that! Or, well, we're not seventeen anymore, but I didn't mean.. I want.. or, you, well, you know- fuck you..”
Another burst of laughter later, Albus glared at the man who was causing him equal parts misery and youthful, lovingly butterflies.
“My Albus. You’re amazing, you know that? I promise to bring you back here so you can experience both the cake and the tea. I can even see to it that the apricot jam is replaced with lemon. How about that?”
How could he ever deny Gellert anything when he was looking at him like that?
“Good. Shall we take Vienna after that?”
“Wherever you want to go.”
“Wherever you are."